As evil AG gollum Jeff Sessions fights back against Trump, clutching massive pearls over the suggestion the DOJ was politically motivated under his reign, Trump declared the market would crash if his treasonous, orange pumpkin head were impeached. The National Enquirer’s David Pecker has decided to cooperate with Mueller’s investigation and has a safe full of evidence against the Cheeto. The Donald uses special tech to conceal communications with Vlad and Co. With a single stupid tweet about South Africa inspired by FOX bigot load Tucker Carlson, our rapist-in-chief further embraced a white nationalist bullcrap narrative. A gay Utah Republican claims LGBT youth suicide is a result of too much sex. A supporter of Shitler assaulted a car with a knife at a Kathy Griffin comedy show. In the Republikkk of Alabama, a crackpot preacher who speaks in tongues demanded prayers for Trump. Finally, Don the Con, reminded us flipping should be illegal.