Episode Transcript
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0:00
Hello Hello. I wasn't
0:02
talking to you, to was you, talking was
0:04
listener. Oh. Guess what? We've got new
0:06
merch. And everything you buy goes
0:08
directly to supporting the show, which we're
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now making new episodes of. yeah
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Store Store .goodmorningfromhell.com. You'll find classics like
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our mugs and our pink hail Clayton
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shirts. We some new stuff that
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doesn't look like crap because Chris didn't
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design all of it this time.
0:23
Yeah. Stickers shirts, sweaters. Maybe someday we'll
0:25
have cars. Who's to say Get
0:27
your car at store .goodmorningfromhell.com. Good
0:32
morning from hell. It's me
0:34
Clayton, and I'm writing solo. Where's
0:36
Chris? Chris! I
0:39
gotta say there's someone I need to talk to.
0:41
You're out of breath. Oh, why your breath smell so
0:44
bad? Oh my god Because the shit you made
0:46
me eat. But there's a little girl I to talk
0:48
to you about. Okay. but There's a little girl?
0:50
Yeah, What? I don't think No, no, no. We just
0:52
started the podcast recording. You're late. You should have
0:54
checked your Google calendar. Okay. All right So whatever it
0:56
is, it can wait. Alright. Alright. Okay
0:59
All right, now go take some breath mints.
1:01
Okay. we we get through some orders of
1:03
business. Now, Oh, yes welcome to good morning Hell.
1:05
I am Clayton, this is Chris. He's eating
1:07
shit, his breath smells terrible. For context, if you
1:09
aren't familiar, I'm dead. And my eternal punishment
1:11
is to do this podcast where we interview everyone
1:13
in hell. Clayton, did you introduce yourself? Well,
1:16
yeah, mean, Clayton, mean I I did introduce myself.
1:18
Sorry. I missed it. We're all over the place,
1:20
this is a weird introduction. You came in,
1:22
you're out of breath, you breathed in my face,
1:24
and now you're all calm all of a
1:26
sudden. Well, I the breath mints really chilled me
1:28
out. Oh, okay. Okay, well good, that's good.
1:30
Yeah, no, I'm the brother of Satan,
1:32
Clayton, et cetera, et cetera, cetera. Okay, all
1:34
right, let's get into Q &a. What do
1:36
you got for us, Chris? Okay, uh This
1:39
is from Keith Foley on
1:41
our hatrion. Is exothermic or
1:43
endothermic? Okay, first of all,
1:45
nerd, Um, does that mean?
1:47
I'm gonna google Does it
1:49
give off heat or does
1:51
it absorb heat? Exothermic versus,
1:53
is that like he asking
1:56
about hell's like complexion? Like
1:58
it does have eczema. Or
2:00
I don't know That be it. I
2:02
mean, I would imagine it gives
2:04
off heat Okay, exothermic releases heat energy
2:06
to its surroundings making it
2:08
feel warm while an endothermic reaction absorbs heat energy
2:10
its surroundings Making it feel cool.
2:12
Thank you, Google AI, for all your hard
2:14
work calling all the sources
2:17
from the internet. Okay, so I don't know how
2:19
to answer that. I would
2:21
say Keith, Have you ever
2:23
heard of hell? It's hot Yeah, I
2:25
would say both We're gonna go with both.
2:27
Okay. Thank you, Keith. question Alright All right, Chris, next
2:29
question, Chris. We all just got a question from Mike Longfellow
2:31
on the Hatreon. they asked, That's a fake name,
2:33
that's a a fake name. a I know,
2:35
totally. I know, totally. honest. What is the
2:37
current water level of the river of Dix?
2:39
Are there hurricanes in Hell? context,
2:41
if you're not familiar, the River Styx, it
2:43
it was a mispronunciation. It's actually
2:45
a river of Dix. Yeah, Dante got
2:48
that wrong. So, you know
2:50
what, River of I'm glad that you brought
2:52
that up there, Mike, Mr. Longfellow. You
2:54
know, climate change, although fake on Earth,
2:56
very real down in hell. So, the
2:58
River of Dix, it's rising. every day, and
3:00
more Dix, you know It's true you do not
3:02
want to be in a hurricane near the
3:04
River of Dix. let me tell you all right Chris?
3:07
No, no. I mean I know you've been
3:09
in one it's some of the roughest weather
3:11
I've ever seen and you talk about
3:13
like a hurricane, you know rating of one,
3:15
three or four or five I mean these
3:17
some of these go up to like nine
3:19
and a half it yeah I mean we're
3:21
almost like the foot logs. Um, So, it's
3:23
a pretty intense hurricane. Yeah, yeah. No, I mean,
3:25
I have made Chris sit in several
3:27
hurricanes near the River of Dix and
3:29
he's just been pounded to death, you know?
3:31
just, Salami's just hitting him and right. You know,
3:34
he comes back battered and bruised. and wet
3:36
And wet from all sorts of things.
3:38
It's terrible. so. yeah, you know, save our planet,
3:40
you know? Save our planet. It's very
3:42
exothermic. Yeah. It's very endothermic, you know?
3:44
It's crazy down here. We keep up
3:46
those levels of heat or cold or whatever it
3:48
might be. That's right. If you're listening
3:50
at home, you can do can do us a
3:52
favor. You outside with an aerosol can just blast
3:55
that puppy up in the air you know
3:57
I think how it works out from if
3:59
my calculations are I've done a lot
4:01
of science is a the worse is up an earth
4:03
better it is down in hell So you
4:05
know if you want to submit some
4:07
more questions you can join our hate
4:09
John good from hell.com Oh here. I got
4:11
one here. We go here here Stephanie Strang
4:13
cat Adams says you guys ever
4:15
do a D &D game on
4:17
the show again? But Clayton
4:20
plays two of all D&D for nerds
4:22
All right. totally for nerds Yeah,
4:24
I don't think any of
4:26
us no no doing a D&D? &D
4:29
Podcast these days. I mean, let's
4:31
be real, you know stupid. It's crazy. It's
4:33
dumb everyone doing a &D podcast. It's
4:35
just dumb. It's just dumb. There's no
4:37
money in &D. So thanks for the
4:39
question. Thanks for the waste of
4:41
time more like all right now on
4:43
business Chris. were you gasping about? okay?
4:45
so you know how you mentioned, you
4:47
know your secret mission Oh, right.
4:49
Yes to determine whether or not
4:51
people in hell belong in hell yeah,
4:53
yeah, yeah we We judging whether or
4:55
not, you know, yeah, some people
4:57
may have gotten misplaced right yeah Well,
4:59
I think I found one you one.
5:01
I got one You think you you found
5:03
we found a little angel down here She's
5:05
the most adorable little Let me can
5:07
I I'm just bring her in. Okay.
5:09
All right. Come on in. Hey. hey
5:11
Tilly Oh,
5:14
hello, hello Who
5:17
are you? I'm scared.
5:19
Oh, hi scared. I'm Clayton. It's
5:21
okay I'm
5:25
just messing with you tillie. It's
5:27
okay. Don't cry. It's okay. Yeah,
5:30
don't worry. He's just a demon from
5:32
hell. It's okay Yeah oh God, that's
5:34
so scary a demon. Yeah, not
5:36
a demon Yeah, wait that again say
5:38
that again that line more time not
5:40
a demon not it, okay do
5:43
I I know you we've we've tell you we've met
5:45
before? No, you're a
5:47
stranger mister. I've never seen
5:49
you in my whole life, and I've
5:51
only lived for seven years She's only
5:53
seven seven years Clayton Chris. Where'd you find
5:55
this kid? Where'd you find this kid?
5:57
I found her stuck in a mud A mud
5:59
pit? A mud pit. I was stuck!
6:02
Yeah. Stuck doing what? What are
6:04
you What are you doing here, Tilly? I don't
6:06
know, I'm lost. Okay, she's lost. My
6:08
mommy and daddy and me so much,
6:10
I hope I can see them
6:12
again. Hmm. where are you, Where are your
6:14
mommy and daddy, are mommy and daddy? did you - Did
6:17
you die? know I don't think so I don't
6:19
think so. Hmm. gosh. Interesting.
6:22
just an innocent little girl. I'm just
6:24
haven't even lived yet. I
6:26
haven't loved yet. I lost or lost done
6:28
anything fun. Oh, that's so
6:30
tragic. That's so tragic. Um, Chris, can you-
6:32
Hasn't or lost? Chris, you hand me
6:34
that bucket of boiling water over
6:37
there really quick? You passed that to me. Why? Yeah,
6:39
just it to me. Just it to me. it to me. I hit
6:41
you. I
6:48
slapped. don't gotta me I
6:50
knew it. is not a Tilly.
6:52
This is a Bazoo Zoo, isn't it? Oh,
6:54
hey, what's up? What's What's
6:57
good? Chris, got fooled man. got fooled by
6:59
the best in the biz what's up
7:01
Bazoo Look, you me you got me but they
7:03
call me the best in the business Why am
7:05
in the best in the biz, man? I'm sorry, but
7:08
Tilly? Tilly? nah, tilly, Nah. tilly? That's just
7:10
It's just a girl that I inhabit it, you know?
7:12
That's just, just a- I her. I possessed her.
7:14
That's what I do. That's what I do. I
7:16
things. Chris, what you witnessed is a
7:18
classic possession, all right? We're demons. it's what
7:20
we do, do in and Bazoo Zoo. happens
7:22
to be the best in the
7:24
biz. A classic hashtag Pazoo Zoo
7:27
possession, you know, it's, it's
7:29
what I do. That's
7:31
right. That's right. So what what about Tilly?
7:34
Maybe she's dead. Yeah, Yeah. I came
7:36
I came into the- It came. I I came into the
7:38
soul, then I make her you know
7:40
killer parents, whatever kill the dog.
7:42
They're always a dog and you
7:44
know and it's I just- I my thing
7:46
and then I live my life
7:48
and I find the next. I the
7:50
next on the next I find the next.
7:52
of You heard from the exorcist? You heard of the
7:54
the exorcist is, know who that is, right,
7:56
Chris? seen You seen this? I've - I've -
7:58
I'm aware of the exorcist. Right. the movie. Yeah,
8:00
been it since it since 73 man. I've been at it.
8:02
Yeah, so, you know, Chris, you know, that's
8:04
just like of demon culture, you know, like
8:07
either torturing people down here in hell or
8:09
we're going up to earth you know,
8:11
up in the earth realm And then we're like into
8:13
people's bodies and we're making them do stupid
8:15
shit. It's fun, right, Pazuzu Yeah, so is
8:17
there a way to you know save
8:19
Tilly soul in way you know?
8:22
know I don't know let
8:24
me check in with her. Hey
8:26
mister. Hey. so scared it's okay
8:28
no I hope my soul
8:30
can be safe. Yeah me too. Don't worry Tilly.
8:32
We're gonna get you. You're so safe. You've
8:34
got a Pizzuzu in you Oh, no,
8:36
What am I gonna do? Chris
8:38
go give her a hug.
8:41
She needs comfort. Oh, no, I'm
8:43
stuck in hell the midnest guy
8:45
ever! You won't be stuck!
8:47
Hey, hey, It's just I got her I
8:49
her! you her! you know, pazuzu is
8:51
Tilly Tilly's bazuzu There's no separating
8:53
us unless do a first-class exorcism. so
8:55
you know, what are you
8:57
gonna do? yeah Chris you you fell
8:59
for it again. You You got pazuzu Well,
9:01
I'm just saying you you know, like this
9:03
little girl, down in hell. you know,
9:05
we uh-huh -huh. ...just seek permission. Well,
9:08
no no, no, no Chris This is, again,
9:10
bazuzu is it's as easy demon you know? and sometimes
9:12
goes up he grabs people. I mean, bazoozoo,
9:14
tell them about all the different
9:16
kinds of folks that you've brought down, you
9:18
know, in your possession days. All
9:21
right, so there this there is
9:23
this meter made right? like Like like absolutely
9:25
people parking tickets or
9:27
whatever. they going to hell regardless Uh-huh.
9:29
What was that guy's name?
9:32
like Ronnie or what? honey, and I
9:34
inhabited Ronnie, and I did like
9:36
meanest thing ever. You wouldn't
9:38
believe what I did. It
9:40
was really me Hey,
9:43
man, I'm struggling. I'm
9:45
running out of ideas. I'm running
9:47
out of people to To make them
9:49
bad things. And you
9:51
know, I'm kind of peeling back the
9:53
layers of myself here what I'm gonna
9:55
do next. Oh wow. hard. It's hard
9:57
out here for a demon. Yeah You're
10:00
getting vulnerable with this business. I know that. I wish you
10:02
had hit me up earlier. You know you got
10:04
some great hits under your belt You know,
10:06
like, remember back in like this is a bit
10:08
of a weird one, but bear with
10:10
me. Howard Dean 2004, Howard Dean, he was like
10:13
a candidate as a politician. yes Yes, Yeah, and
10:15
I was like, what if he just
10:17
screamed, man? Yeah, What if he just screamed
10:19
and fucked up his whole, his whole stick
10:21
Give us the scream It was like, and we're
10:23
gonna go to the White House Yeah. Yeah. It
10:26
was like that. Yeah, it was
10:28
just, it was. It is you and we
10:31
back. We listened back to that scream, and
10:33
It's like, maybe that wasn't such
10:35
a big deal. Maybe they're candidates now much
10:37
worse things that we should have worried about
10:39
them and less about the guy guy screaming But
10:41
you know, that was me. yeah, That
10:43
was me. I'm saying I could have
10:46
made a great president well. So there
10:48
you go. you see bozoo you still got
10:50
it. it. shouldn't be so down on
10:52
yourself. There's plenty of things that you've
10:54
got going for you. Man, and dude,
10:56
just when I think I'm down
10:58
on myself, you bring me right back
11:01
up up to hell. You are the wind
11:03
beneath my wings dude. Got you. I you, bro
11:05
I I mean, Chris bazuzu and I you used
11:07
to go to demon together. So we a
11:09
long history. and yeah, you know, I mean,
11:11
Bazoozer was like best in the theater department
11:14
Bazoozer was so good. I was. yeah,
11:16
you know, they even gave me
11:18
one of those, those yearbook like best stuff They were
11:20
like most to fuck up. You know, it
11:22
was a demon but demon superlatives That's what they
11:24
called It was it was an honor. but maybe I
11:26
peaked in high school, man. No, maybe I
11:29
peaked You can't say that bazuzu You can't
11:31
say that. Chris Why why don't you get
11:33
like inspired bazuzu Come on. I am still
11:35
really invested in Tilly I I think that
11:37
was really impressive. You know, I've
11:39
been in hell for a while now and
11:41
I come across little girls
11:44
that so innocent. And are you
11:46
sure that she's okay? Yeah,
11:48
we should check back in with
11:50
Tilly. Yeah, guess all All right.
11:52
Hey, hey, hey. Tilly, Tilly, come
11:54
here. What? Hey Hello? Okay. I
11:56
I feel like I've been in
11:58
another place for last like five
12:00
minutes or so I'm so confused and
12:02
I I get these bad
12:04
thoughts like that I could be
12:06
mean no No, no, no, no no No,
12:08
Oh, Chris. what what is what's getting what are we
12:10
going to do with her? Next time you feel
12:12
something pulling you away, you just stick with it, okay?
12:14
You just stick with it. Okay. don't
12:16
go back. Okay. I'll think about
12:18
yeah, yeah unicorns and in
12:21
my my doggy. Mr. Floppy mr.
12:23
Floppy. Yeah, yeah, he's got
12:25
these big floppy ears and he
12:27
knows how to sit and
12:29
shake I'll just think about that.
12:31
Yeah, instead of thinking about
12:34
Destruction and war oh, yeah, killing
12:36
people. Yeah. Oh, no No,
12:38
no, oh, no not till no till he
12:40
don't think about those things, no! Yeah,
12:42
I might have gotten like an innocent kid
12:44
down here. Yeah, I I should have
12:47
like stayed up there with her and
12:49
like kind of made a wreck a
12:51
havoc in her classroom or whatever. You mean
12:53
like asking what sexies and stuff like
12:55
that in the classroom or something like
12:57
that? But no, I brought it down
12:59
here. Maybe that was a mistake. No,
13:01
because you you guys, I'm just so filled
13:03
with self -doubt You know what? This is
13:05
going to be an episode where we give
13:07
a lot of affirmations and let's consider this
13:09
like a therapy session, okay, Pizzuzu? Okay. Yeah
13:12
for sure I feel like
13:14
you need some better, you know, like
13:16
internal monologuing, you know like you need to
13:18
have like like what's going on in
13:20
your brain right now Like how are you
13:22
treating yourself and the inside? I'm
13:24
like, you're a bad demon, man.
13:26
Whenever you do something bad,
13:28
it's like that's not good. And
13:30
so that's just this negative
13:32
feedback loop I find myself in
13:34
where the worst I am,
13:36
the worst I think I'm gonna
13:39
be yeah, those negative thoughts really can't
13:41
consume you. What do you see when
13:43
you look in the mirror? Yeah, for
13:45
the audience at home, we are talking
13:47
to a little girl. She is seven
13:49
years old, but you know, whenever she's
13:51
talking Pazuzu mode Her head flips around
13:53
180 degrees. It's actually kind of kind of weird
13:55
It's a little disturbing. It's a little weird. a little
13:57
weird. You have to. do that? Yeah, I do
13:59
because It's it of helps me get
14:01
in the character, you know, I'm like I
14:03
see I look in the mirror I
14:06
see everybody I've ever been so this is
14:08
like, you know, your average Playboy
14:10
guy who's just like, you
14:12
know, like doing taxes and like
14:14
getting his wiener sucked stuff like that
14:17
But you know, you also you
14:19
also have like just you
14:21
know, I've been dolls before I've been
14:23
creepy dolls So I see dolls in the
14:25
mirror classic. Yeah, yeah classic creepy
14:27
doll scenario stuff like that And then you
14:30
know I see my father Oh,
14:32
look in the mirror I see
14:34
my father Oh, did you possess your dad or you
14:36
know, sometimes I think he's possessing
14:38
me. Oh. Oh, I got I got
14:40
this gray hair that's coming up right
14:43
through my eyebrow and I it's
14:45
just like he had It's just like he had and
14:47
I think you know I I
14:49
hear his voice in my
14:51
head Sometimes like you're not enough
14:53
at being bad Wow, and so
14:55
it's hard Listen, you know, I I know
14:57
it's like to live in a person's shadow.
14:59
You know, my brother is Satan All right,
15:01
bazoo zoo, so I'm like right there with you,
15:03
you know But like you got focus on you
15:05
you got to focus on like what makes you
15:07
you Chris I I we need to like we
15:09
need to build bazoo zoo -esteem from the ground up Uh-huh,
15:11
I think they need to possess you. I
15:13
I know you think that that's really gonna help bazoo
15:15
zoo out Well, yeah, I mean, but it's not
15:17
really you wouldn't like it in here. No, honestly,
15:19
bazoo I think you should give it a
15:21
go. I think you should give it a go
15:23
but right, all
15:26
right, just uh, just me Chris
15:28
you would say on your
15:30
worst day to your
15:32
best friend What what really
15:34
hurt your best friend's feelings? Yeah,
15:37
Chris what would really hurt my
15:39
feelings? Uh, Uh, well Clayton, you know,
15:41
I don't think you're ever gonna to
15:43
anything more than podcasting. Whoa! Well
15:46
Clayton, don't think you're
15:48
going to amount to anything more
15:50
than podcasting and really is is
15:52
there a worse career? Is
15:55
there - career that attracts
15:57
more rabid animals
15:59
lowest of the low thinking
16:01
that their opinions about
16:03
anything matter to anyone,
16:05
shouting into the void,
16:07
as if their thing
16:09
wasn't the worst, most fartest
16:12
thing of an opinion that
16:14
else could come up
16:16
with in their car on
16:18
the 405, driving southbound Wow Wow Wow
16:20
podcast that's uh oh
16:23
wow whoa Chris you're back.
16:25
What a rush, man what a rush. rush see
16:27
you you know you jumped in and and that
16:29
really that stung pazuzu I mean, that really you got
16:31
to the core of me on that one. yeah
16:33
I mean, that's sometimes just try to, try
16:35
to really, you know, just be mean was
16:37
like, I'm a demon and it's feels good,
16:39
man. feels good. you in on that one,
16:41
you're good. You see, you're good at
16:43
character work because a second there, I really
16:45
didn't think that Chris was talking to
16:47
me one -on -one saying, is this what
16:49
we should be doing? Should we be podcasting?
16:52
Wow just just work, Pazuzu. you the topic of
16:54
podcast I did want to pause quick and talk about,
16:56
you you know, this is a podcast. We
16:58
try to make money from this and
17:00
part of the way that we make
17:02
money is through a patreon So if you got
17:04
a good one help calm that's our patreon That's how
17:06
you can sign up and and this stupid
17:08
dream or nightmare alive. If you're not
17:10
a member already, it's only six dollars and sixty six
17:12
which is, you know, a hell of a
17:14
deal. You get access to our other podcast
17:16
or exclusive podcast why we're going to hell That's a
17:18
great show. You can get roasted You can get
17:20
up me on LinkedIn. You can submit
17:23
Q and A. All sorts of fun perks.
17:25
also you know you know, if you're already
17:27
a member or if you're looking for a
17:29
gift this season, you can gift a membership. That's
17:31
right. does that now. Just got a good word from
17:33
help Scroll down to the bottom of the you're
17:35
page. just like blue tab. Boom. Gift looking
17:37
a membership. give to a friend. Give it
17:39
to an enemy. Give it to somebody to
17:41
it to fucking anybody All right, just keep the
17:43
show alive. subscribe to us on Patreon or
17:46
gift to membership both, you know? Fuck it.
17:48
I'm I'm sure you're rich. you're rolling in the
17:50
money. my works in
17:52
B2B marketing He came by my
17:54
school for career day and
17:56
said he was a big roas man
17:58
then told everyone how much
18:00
he loved loved his return on ad spend.
18:03
My friends still laugh me to this day. Not
18:06
gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll
18:08
be able to reach people who
18:10
do. Get a hundred dollar
18:12
credit on your next ad campaign.
18:14
Go to linkedin.com/ to claim your
18:16
credit. That's LinkedIn.com slash campaign. Terms
18:18
and conditions apply. LinkedIn. The
18:20
place to be, To be. Where Where
18:22
we though? Pazuzu, that was an incredible
18:24
possession. That was amazing. You're super
18:26
talented. Stop it. Stop it. You're
18:29
too kind. You're too kind. know,
18:31
I see my other demon friends
18:33
doing possession, it feels like they're
18:35
always 10 steps ahead of me.
18:37
I got one. One guy was
18:39
possessing the president of Blumhouse. Yeah. Blumhouse
18:42
doing all the movies and stuff like
18:44
that. You know, kind of appropriating culture
18:46
if you think about it. But
18:48
you know, it was just like he
18:50
was the the whole of the horror
18:52
So you know, he's he's getting places. He's
18:54
with movers and shakers and I'm just
18:56
here, you know, possessing little girls
18:58
and stuff. So I'm there. I mean,
19:00
that felt really bad when you
19:02
were in me. Like really hurt. Oh, it did?
19:04
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's like torturous.
19:06
You know, and I live in
19:08
hell, So. I Oh, man. man. That's great,
19:10
dude. Yeah. That great. That makes
19:12
me feel so good about myself,
19:14
dude. Yeah. You still got it. You still
19:16
got it, Pazuzu. And know, like. I I
19:18
got it. And like, you know, podcasting
19:21
may be a dying medium, it
19:23
might be oversaturated. And yeah, there's like too
19:25
many to support all at once.
19:27
And people are like, why am
19:29
I going to to my money like to
19:31
the podcast? But you know, possession, there's
19:33
big money in possession. All right.
19:35
Just the other day I saw like
19:37
an article about the president of
19:39
Abercrombie and Fridge. That guy's possessed? He's been
19:41
doing stupid stuff. I mean, all
19:43
over the place. guy. Yeah, It's it
19:45
was such a big twist too,
19:47
Cause I used to possess guys like
19:49
front of Abercrombie and Fridge with all the naked
19:51
models. And that was just a
19:53
big surprise to find out that
19:55
that guy was that. So but know, to
19:57
their own. It's it's interesting. Yeah. lot.
19:59
a lot of controversies, a lot of controversies and
20:01
I be the of any of them
20:03
Yeah. So that feels good What's it
20:05
like when you're not possessing? I
20:08
wake up, I put on my
20:10
flaming demon shoes, one cloven at
20:12
a time, and go to the gym,
20:14
get a little pump, get get little a
20:16
pump in, and then I just kinda look
20:18
at the job boards. There's an indeed, a
20:20
hellish indeed. it's very, very scary, it's a
20:22
real scary version of Indeed, and it
20:24
tells you all these possession jobs that
20:26
you might be, but but you I guess
20:28
I spent a little too much time
20:30
on the couch, man. I spent too much
20:32
time on the couch playing video games,
20:34
I'm a gamer, I'm a bit of
20:36
a gamer. I think you're talking about inbreed. I
20:38
think that that's the site that
20:40
you're talking about. about. Yeah Yeah. Oh yeah.
20:42
Inbreed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's the one you
20:44
know, Bazuzu, think what we got to do if
20:47
I may I mean, what do I
20:49
know? I'm just a podcaster, okay, but I
20:51
think we got to up a game plan
20:53
for you We need to come up with
20:55
some some checkpoints, life goals that you can
20:57
hit You know And then I think that
20:59
that's gonna get you back up on
21:01
your clothing feed. Yeah, you know going again Yeah, man.
21:04
go on again. Is there anyone you've
21:06
always wanted to possess but never,
21:08
you know, Yeah. Yeah. it Dude, you you know,
21:10
ever since the Howard Dean thing, I've always
21:13
wanted to get a president. never could. Nicholas
21:15
Cage tried that guy a few times. There's
21:17
a lot of senators that you could easily
21:19
get. In fact, I think some of them are
21:21
already taken. Some of those spots have been
21:23
parked, but I think you could get a a senator.
21:26
of those spots are definitely parked. Yeah.
21:28
you know, I've never possessed a
21:30
demon already possessing somebody though.
21:32
you know, the old, the double dipping, you
21:34
know, I don't think anybody's
21:36
ever done that. There's a first for that,
21:38
you could try that. A lot of layers. You
21:40
try that. I think that a good goal to
21:42
have, you know? I mean, how many demons can
21:45
we get into Marjorie Taylor Greene, really? That
21:47
boy can fit so many demons,
21:49
you have no idea. Yeah. I mean
21:51
when they were at the, you know up up
21:53
in Congress and they just going around there slapping
21:55
them, They're like this boy five demons. Yep. You could
21:57
five demons So many demons. Five demons. You know, Chris, out.
22:00
of Bazuzu possessing you earlier. Yeah, yeah.
22:02
It's a daily thing, you know, possession.
22:04
You're been out and then you see
22:06
someone and you're like, what if I
22:08
punched him? Right in the punched face, right
22:10
in the face. You know that call
22:12
to the void, you know? Yeah, yeah,
22:14
a lot, a lot. Yeah, every time
22:16
you're sitting in a theater and you
22:18
think about pulling that fire alarm, that's
22:20
just me licking your ear, buddy. That's
22:23
just them giving you a little tickle,
22:25
you know? It's a really weird statement
22:27
out of Tilly. Yeah. Even with the
22:29
reverse head, that's a weird thing. Yeah,
22:31
with the reverse head, the blackened eyes,
22:33
the blood coming from every orifice of
22:35
the face. Yeah, the yeah. Do you
22:37
need a tissue, by the the way? That
22:39
is a lot of blood, a lot
22:41
of blood. No, no, yeah, it's just
22:44
a cold, it's a cold, man. Okay,
22:46
man, going through it, Bazuzu. I took
22:48
the home test, man, it's saying negative.
22:50
I'm good to hang out with you,
22:52
man. Okay, all right, yeah. Those home
22:54
tests, they work all the time. Yeah,
22:56
you gotta let me hang out with
22:58
you in close quarters, man. Chris, Bazuzu's
23:00
already been in there. Damage has been
23:02
done, you know? From my experience with
23:04
Exorcist, the movie, people are always trying
23:07
to get demons to come out. Has
23:09
that ever happened to you? you ever
23:11
been like ousted? Oh, evicted, we call
23:13
it, yeah. Oh, yeah. Evicted, I guess?
23:15
Yeah, we call it evicted. It's tough,
23:17
man. It's like you spend so much
23:19
time in character, so to speak. So
23:21
I was possessing Christian Bale. This was
23:23
a few years ago. Mm -hmm, mm -hmm.
23:25
And maybe some gaffer left some lighting
23:28
in a weird path such that it
23:30
caused the reverse curse. gaffing exorcism, so
23:32
to speak, got me out of Christian
23:34
Bale. He started yelling at this gaffer.
23:36
It was a whiplash for me and
23:38
for Christian. It wasn't good for either
23:40
of us. He starts yelling, I start
23:42
yelling. We're just like, you know, you
23:44
spend so much time with somebody. You
23:46
get to know their loves, their fears,
23:49
and then you pull your thrust out
23:51
of that world. It's rough, man. Terminator
23:53
salvation. Who am I? Oh, yeah, that
23:55
was tough. good one, McGy. Yeah. Yeah.
23:57
know, but Buzuzu, you were inside of
23:59
Christian during all - with all performances of Terminator
24:01
salvation. Yeah. If I may, I mean, that's
24:03
a pretty good Terminator movie. Let's be
24:05
honest, let's be honest. I thought
24:07
same thing. I went to the theaters
24:09
and I saw fucking Terminator dark fate. Yeah.
24:11
And I thought that wasn't that
24:14
bad. I thought it was fine. So
24:16
there. They got gas in the
24:18
tank. I was with for many years.
24:20
Yeah. His His Oscars, if he has
24:22
Oscars, should mine. Yeah. So there. Do
24:25
they have awards for
24:27
demons, like possessions? Oh yeah. The
24:30
possesses. The possesses. that's right, right. Yes.
24:32
possesses? The possesses? no, it's
24:34
big. Yeah, I did a
24:36
campaign Yeah. me for me this
24:38
history teacher. Yeah Yeah, I put
24:40
up the billboards and everything and
24:42
it it a lot of money actually.
24:44
actually find out that sometimes more of those
24:46
big demons have a lot of
24:49
money to campaign for that stuff.
24:51
So there's a lot of politics into
24:53
the whole thing I'd imagine a
24:55
lot of politics Yeah. A lot of
24:57
politics involved, Yeah, for sure. It's like
24:59
a Yeah. you know some of the best greatest
25:01
hits though, you know the Coney 2012 guy that
25:03
was a a classic possession You know him on
25:05
that street corner. That was a classic. Yeah. Oh
25:08
Oh God. David David he's had his fair
25:10
share of possessions. Look, we're
25:12
getting off track, but I just
25:14
want to say, if anybody would ever
25:16
consider me for a possessy, you don't
25:19
even know the lengths I go to
25:21
possess somebody. I have stalked families for
25:23
months. Yeah. so you know what
25:25
I think that that's that's, we talking about
25:27
earlier, but there you go You
25:29
know, that's your objective. That's your goal.
25:31
We're gonna what's it called your You're manifest.
25:33
You're gonna manifest getting a possessy. Okay, Bazuzu? Yeah.
25:36
what I haven't That's that's what I've
25:38
got on my got on my 2025 card, okay?
25:40
Oh, Love that. Love to hear that. that.
25:42
What if I possessed a
25:45
listener to tune into your podcast
25:47
that you do? huh? A
25:49
little tip tad, little little
25:52
demon pro quo situation.
25:54
so yeah. don't know what would
25:56
someone to listen to this show But
25:59
you can do your. You're worst, you know, yeah
26:01
Pure Maybe and I got it in me.
26:03
I tell ya. yeah, maybe maybe I'm
26:05
just gonna throw this out there if
26:07
you really wanted to go the extra
26:09
Yeah, go ahead you could possess someone
26:11
to follow us on Patreon pay us $6.66
26:13
a dollars and 66 six a month
26:15
I'm just saying that would go
26:17
a long way Pazuzu. Oh Yeah to possess somebody
26:19
reach into their wallet like I've reached into
26:21
their soul. It's just that I
26:23
think it may be possible. Do
26:25
have a preference on like when
26:27
you jump into someone like the
26:29
more innocent, the better. Yeah. Yeah, the more
26:31
I can corrupt the very Essence
26:34
of what people to
26:36
be harmless, then make
26:38
that like a Harmful thing
26:41
an evil dog thing. Maybe just
26:43
dark and twisted. Pazuzu, I say that
26:45
right, Pazuzu? Pazuzu, Yeah, Is there any
26:47
like someone you've always wanted
26:49
to get into, know, Oh, dude. you
26:51
you know someone. Thank you
26:54
for asking. Yeah. Yeah. yeah. you
26:56
for asking this question. So
26:58
many people don't don't really
27:00
dive in, really dive in but
27:02
is is person who
27:04
would be a dream to sneak
27:06
sneak into. Oh, yeah
27:09
Fortunately a very very high
27:11
security person you know, you
27:13
would know him as the Pope. Oh
27:15
Oh, would be like huge
27:17
huge for you. Yeah.
27:19
Yeah In terms is kind
27:21
of like an Ocean's 11 scenario. would
27:23
have to hire another demon yeah, so maybe
27:26
make that heist me I mean if you're
27:28
free if you're free if you want to
27:30
if you want to try the Pope, well,
27:32
you could try the Pope, I would love
27:34
to love the invite is open. I
27:36
think that that's the beginnings of an
27:39
incredible team I mean, this is like the
27:41
Fort of of possession, this would be awesome
27:43
You know, maybe I can get like
27:45
a cardinal or something, you know get
27:47
his guards down Yeah, you definitely need
27:49
an inside man in order to get
27:51
inside of that man, right Right. right. Yeah,
27:54
like got the Cardinal, but but I realized it
27:56
was like the wrong kind. It was like
27:58
the burden. Oh. mistake. Yeah find a
28:00
different cardinal there. Yeah I mean that
28:02
would definitely be the dream We've
28:04
got to get into Vatican City yeah no I
28:07
mean I we can we
28:09
can come in from below you
28:11
know obviously take up through
28:13
hell Oh wait wait telling me something
28:15
yeah my parents were planning
28:17
a visit to Vatican City to
28:19
get me blessed. Oh there's our inn think
28:21
yeah. Yeah great Tilly thank you wow
28:23
in clutch that's awesome I
28:25
didn't even know that she anything
28:27
to contribute to this is great
28:29
way to go yeah. So she
28:32
got it to the Vatican to
28:34
get blessed though what happen to you. Oh oh
28:36
oh yikes yeah I find somebody to
28:38
jump into pronto before that happens
28:40
because that holy water it burns. It
28:42
burns like hell. It burns. different yeah. Oh
28:44
think we got the beginnings
28:46
of a plan here I think
28:48
we got the beginnings of
28:50
a beautiful plan so yeah I'm feeling
28:52
rejuvenated baby I'm feeling the
28:54
best I've felt in man We did it thanks
28:57
to you Chris brought this strange little
28:59
girl in and then now we're gonna over
29:01
the Pope and get him
29:03
possessed and then he's gonna rule the
29:05
world and then start the next devil revolution.
29:07
We're gonna the world Chris and it's all
29:09
down to you my man
29:11
well I don't Way go Chris at
29:13
all the good you've done you've
29:15
helped Pazuzu who is now going to
29:17
possess one of the most important
29:19
religious figures alive. Yeah. And then we're
29:22
just gonna fuck up way to go Chris. We're
29:24
fuck so much it up things can't
29:26
even conceive of happening in
29:28
a bad way will happen because
29:30
of you Chris it's gonna be
29:32
great Yeah. You are gonna make earth
29:34
objectively worse by giving bazoozoo this
29:36
amazing idea Chris. Hey love that man love it.
29:38
you possessed right now Chris? No. Is
29:40
this another possession? Is this another classmate Pazuzu?
29:43
No just me Okay all right Oh it's
29:45
just okay well well just know
29:47
you got a friend in the
29:49
possession business and you get started anytime so
29:52
we're on the on on the great things.
29:54
All great right Pazuzu well I'll see
29:56
all see you up in Vatican
29:58
City. Tilly last words Um, wait,
30:01
not what I meant. I don't want-
30:04
Hey, up Oh my god! Alright, bye
30:06
guys, bye! Bye, Tilly, be-be
30:08
sick. Uh, no, no, she's gone. She's dead,
30:10
She's dead. Yeah, yeah, she's vomiting on the- the - Yeah,
30:12
her head's just spinnin'. It's like a a sprinkler
30:14
out there. She's- -she's watering the lawn with the
30:16
vomit. Wow! Yeah, she just kind of like off like a
30:18
helicopter. Yep, yep, That's how it goes. It's impressive.
30:21
Great episode, you know? I'm glad I
30:23
got to get back up with a friend. I'm
30:25
Chris, You did some bad in the world.
30:27
Good for you. That That was great. Mm-hmm. All
30:29
right. We'll tell the people where they can
30:31
find us and they can support us. Yeah, at
30:33
from Hell most social media or just uh, morning
30:35
from hell on on YouTube or, uh, Patreon. Yeah, or go
30:37
to morningfromhell.com. That's the other one. Yeah. If to become
30:40
a hatred. your friends do it read the
30:42
bad word. Yeah, I'm possessing you to do
30:44
it right now. Turn to the guy next
30:46
to you on the bus and say Ugh, good
30:48
morning from hell. Yeah, Yeah, yeah, do it. that
30:50
could not go wrong. It couldn't go wrong. You
30:52
might be- might be your future spouse that
30:54
way Yeah, you know Find true love. Yeah, turn to the
30:56
person on the left right now spin your
30:59
head around and scream, Good morning from Hell, Good morning from Hell,
31:01
Good morning from Hell, Subscribe, Subscribe, Subscribe. It's gonna great for you, listener.
31:03
It's gonna go go great. All right. Hail Clayton. Hey
31:06
guys, thank you for listening to another episode
31:08
of Good Morning Hell. I forgot the name of
31:10
our own show. Hahaha. We wanted to thank
31:12
Beth May for stopping by. Beth, thank
31:14
you. Thank you for having me.
31:17
Um, my name's Beth May. Um, I
31:19
normally can be found on
31:21
the podcast Dungeons and Daddies, which is a
31:23
podcast about four from our world
31:25
that get flown a fantasy world
31:27
on a quest to rescue
31:29
their lost sons. Um, I'm on
31:31
Instagram and sometimes Twitter. And,
31:34
my handle is at
31:36
Beth May. I'm also working
31:38
on a Kickstarter. Oh. to plug
31:41
that bad boy. Ooh, la la, no, please do.
31:43
Yeah, I am. I'm working
31:45
on going to Edinburgh
31:47
Fringe with my solo
31:50
show Beth Wants the D year,
31:52
so uh, you go to
31:54
bit .ly slash bwtd dash
31:57
Kickstarter and us
31:59
out if you're so inclined. or not, it's
32:01
fine. but I just want
32:03
to say thank you so much for having me ahead of blast.
32:05
Yeah, if you haven't listened to Dungeons and Datties,
32:07
you definitely should. We've had, if you remember,
32:09
if anyone's heard Genghis Khan episode that
32:11
we did with Freddie, he's also on that
32:13
show. It's show. really, it's really, really funny
32:16
show. So, funny yeah. Yeah, We also had
32:18
the awesome opportunity to work together at
32:20
RTX. I don't know if you remember, but
32:22
we were on that, like - mega
32:24
crossover dungeons and
32:27
Yeah, that was that was a freaking blast. I
32:29
was like the first like live thing I had
32:31
done. I was really nervous Was it really But
32:33
ended up being very fun You guys killed it.
32:35
Yeah. All right. well go check out Beth
32:37
May and thank you for listening. Yeah, and
32:40
we're gonna go talk about our sins Oh,
32:42
yeah, yeah, I guess we should plug why
32:44
we're going to hell. Yeah, so for Patreon
32:46
people. Yeah next week on Monday We're gonna
32:48
be having an episode of why we're going
32:50
to hell out with Beth May and for
32:52
those who are unfamiliar If you follow some
32:54
Patreon, it's our exclusive show for our patrons
32:56
where we just have like a little baby
32:58
podcast It's not the full great. It's a
33:01
full grown adult podcast. We have a we
33:03
have a podcast another podcast It's a Oh
33:05
grown podcast for No, no, it's
33:07
not for babies. it's for big cool
33:09
people. So go check this out
33:11
on Patreon. Okay. Bye Thanks, Bye
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