Seasons change, circumstances change, people change and the world changes. everything is always changing. That means we have to allow and even insist that our stories change or we will find ourselves stuck. The longer we hold a story the more

The stories we tell - tell the story of us

Sep 11th, 2020 9m 45s

I am becoming fascinated by the reality that all of us humans are always telling stories, to ourselves. Every single observable fact carries meaning to us as individuals. We experience things and instinctively run them through the grid of our

Am I Kidding Myself?

Sep 4th, 2020 17m 20s

Such a fascinating question that I asked myself for the first time last night. The answer came so quickly that it surprised me. Yes... I am always kidding myself and I do it without even noticing. The reason I believe that, is based on some

But I’m in so much pain

Aug 28th, 2020 9m 26s

If you listened to episode 44 you may have responded with the thought, “but I’m in so much pain!” I did, even as I was recording it. That’s because I was in the early stages of a really painful family crisis. So here I am, In more pain than

I don’t want to feel this way

Aug 21st, 2020 7m 32s

So much is catching up with me emotionally these days. I want COVID to be over. I’m starting to feel trapped and angry. I really want to do some things that move me forward As a human being who lives with and for the sake of black lives knowing

You Upset Me (and a few other confessions)

Aug 14th, 2020 12m 19s

In this episode, Judy describes the way that our human lives bump into each other. As a result, we are always doing and saying things that upset one another. The words that offer a new perspective this week are simply, “of course.” Human being

Why do such imperfect people demand so much perfection from each other?

Aug 7th, 2020 10m 46s

This question has been on my mind a lot lately and I think it’s connected to our fear. Acknowledging my own fear, and the broken ways of relating that have grown out of it creates a great foundation for change. That’s because it humbles me and

What am I really afraid of?

Jul 31st, 2020 11m 41s

Today’s episode is fueled by James Baldwin’s story I Am Not Your Negro, which highlights the role of fear in the story of our racism. He speaks powerfully undeniable and profound words straight into the heart of anyone who is willing to listen!

Change is right here

Jul 24th, 2020 11m 51s

Today’s episode marks the beginning of a new series of episodes that will bring us to the end of year one of The If We Matter Podcast. For the next three months, our focus will be less on the issues that divide us, and more on the issues inside

We are more alike than you think!

Jul 17th, 2020 26m 54s

Today’s episode is an interview with an ordinary person who happens to be a young mom with an amazing heart for people. Crystal was introduced to the If We Matter Podcast by someone she randomly met. When she reached out to me I knew immediatel

Do black lives matter?

Jul 10th, 2020 15m 28s

For a brief moment after the murder of George Floyd, I had the sense that our country was coming together. But things have definitely shifted. I don’t know about you, but that video required me to see things I didn’t want to see. It exposed me

Does my black life matter?

Jul 3rd, 2020 26m 36s

Regina Robinson is a beautiful, competent, confident educated woman who happens to be black. She is a mother of four, a devoted follower of Jesus and the Dean of Student Affairs at Cambridge College in Boston. The last few months have rocked Re

Becoming conscious of the unconscious

Jun 26th, 2020 10m 24s

As racism is being exposed, I’m discovering the goodness of allowing the deeper parts of who I am to be exposed with it. I’ve always wondered about the things hidden in my subconscious mind. What’s in there and how is it impacting who I am?

African American Bridges

Jun 19th, 2020 21m 37s

Much like Danté Upshaw and Neil Edwards, Jua Robinson is an African American who has chosen to live his life as a bridge. Not many will, and no one should be expected to. Maybe that’s what makes these men’s lives such a gift to all of us. Jua l

No one wants to be labeled

Jun 12th, 2020 15m 3s

Right? I don’t like to put labels on others or have them put on me. A person is so much more than any label they wear, and labels have different meanings to different people. I hate being defined by other people who wear the same label as me. L

We are not powerless!

Jun 5th, 2020 27m 18s

Today’s episode is a follow up with Neil Edwards (Episode 31) a man who is committed to speaking truth for the sake of added meaning. I’m certain that new meaning will be added to these moments for you as Neil describes the toxicity of white

Dismantling my human supremacy

May 29th, 2020 11m 18s

At the root of racism and every other related “ism” is the presence of supremacy. Us humans dabble in it every day and some of us live with our feet firmly planted in it, almost like an anchor. We naturally connect with people who share our

I can see myself in you

May 22nd, 2020 25m 52s

Today’s interview is with a beautiful human being who happens to be black. Neil is a coaching colleague and a new friend who has deeply touched my life. His story is unique in that it began in the Bahamas where Neil was privileged to be among t

Am I willing to expose myself?

May 15th, 2020 19m 38s

As Neal speaks of his recent years and personal journey through the issues of racism his intentions are to expose himself. As an older, white, American, male whose life has been devoted to the church, there is a lot to expose. An experience o

Wait, is Christian Supremacy a thing?

May 8th, 2020 14m 29s

If you are not a believer, you are probably ready to give that question a wholehearted “yes.” That’s because you have felt it. On the other hand, If you are a believer, you might be feeling the exact opposite and a bit defensive. I was utterly

It’s a human problem

May 1st, 2020 25m 35s

Today’s conversation opens the door for us to begin some conversations around the significant issue we call racism. The depth of this issue makes it easy for us to leave it “over there” somewhere, and not address it - or to see it as someone el

Take off your mask and let’s go!

Apr 24th, 2020 9m

Episode 26 was profound for this one simple reason. In the midst of his own fear and confusion, Danny put his mask on and went to work on the front lines of in the pandemic. He was ready to live out his purpose as a nurse in spite of the risk.

Get your mask on and let’s go!

Apr 17th, 2020 17m 36s

Today’s episode highlights a health care worker who is doing exactly that. This moment in history is not one that any of us were prepared for. It’s also not something we signed up for. When life happens to us, in unexpected ways, what matters t

Do we have to see to believe?

Apr 10th, 2020 11m 17s

Judy’s reflections from last week's dialogue with Neal, created new energy in her for the If We Matter conversation. Maybe it did you too, or maybe it will as you Interact with her thoughts today around the pandemic. The reality that most of

What is this crazy moment about for you?

Apr 3rd, 2020 26m 40s

In the midst of what feels like an unprecedented global coming together, the vulnerability created by the pandemic seems to have heightened the political conflict both among Americans and among us as countries. There seems to be a desperate nee