Family honor. Does your family name bring you joy? For some it brings shame, and a deep desire to restore that honor. Jerry Dugan shares his story and journey to bring honor to his family name.
At 14, in his mind, his family name stood for trouble, heartbreak, bullying, racial microaggressions and brokenness. He had already been through so much in his young life. And this environment took a huge toll.
Jerry shares with us the life-changing prayers and loving God that lead him to a new family honor, and helped him to change the generational patterns that informed his childhood. He isn’t perfect, but he is The Real Jerry Dugan.

Jeremiah 1:5-“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”

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Topics Shared:
Biracial childhood
Tiger Mom
Performance-based acceptance
Performance-based affection
Top Gun style bet to break up his parents
Heart-breaking divorce
The Army brushed a lot of things under the carpet
Suicide ideations and suicide attempts
Intervention
Loving foster home
Bullied by uncles in Ca.
His gentle father flips the switch to military policeman with army training
A turning point
Deployment to Kuwait, 1/’03-3/’03
Writing the ‘in case I die’ letter
War homecoming and seeing his kids for the first time

Quotes:
“When you are 7 or 8 years old and the amount of affection you are getting from your mom, the kind of attention you get from your mom is solely based on your performance in an activity, that sets a weird expectation.”

“In the movies they always have that ‘in case I die’ letter they hand to their buddy to hand off, but I was so convinced I was going to die, that I wrote my letter. I disguised the wording just enough so it didn’t freak my wife out when she read it, but it was there. Everything I wanted to say to her was in that letter. I folded it, and I mailed it that night. It was one last mail run before we crossed the border.”

“We as a church can do better, back off the condemnation, and demonstrate more of the Jesus who hung out with prostitutes and tax collectors and treated them with dignity, treated them with respect because he honored their dignity.”

References:

Beyond the Rut Website & Podcast:
https://beyondtherut.com/
https://therealjerrydugan.com/

Jerry Dugan’s Ted Talk:
http://therealjerrydugan.com/category/biblical-marriage/

Marriage Episode with Meg Glesener:
https://beyondtherut.com/meg-glesener-healthy-marriage-btr-236/

The Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
& Website: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

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