The final episode! Host Rosie Waterland's spent a lifetime struggling to understand why she wasn't a cool kid, constantly wondering just what she was missing. From her early days trying to hide her poo pants from her sister's friends, to later

Chapter 21: you will learn how to be a functioning adult, and realise you don't care about being a functioning adult

Feb 19th, 2018 37m 58s

When you're twenty-seven years old and realise that you have no clue how to post a letter, it's obvious something has gone very wrong somewhere along the line.Now that host Rosie Waterland was out there living on her own as a functioning adult

Chapter 20: someone will play Jenga with your face and their penis, and you will consider it a sexual revolution

Feb 6th, 2018 51m 19s

If Lisa thought there was ever going to be an episode from Rosie's book 'The Anti-Cool Girl' that was going to make her squirm, this is it. This one is about host Rosie Waterland's more adult escapades: the time she scared a penis back inside i

Chapter 19: you will gain ninety kilos, and it will be the best thing that has ever happened to you

Jan 30th, 2018 52m 30s

After her time in the mental institution, Rosie had never had a healthier sense of self-worth in her entire life. She was learning how to be her own saviour, how to feel comfortable being single and how to be mentally healthy. And then there wa

Chapter 18: you will watch your mum attempt suicide, and realise that she's the only one who understands you

Jan 23rd, 2018 30m 22s

Just like when Rosie was little, something about Mum calling her 'darling' calmed her down. After spending almost a month in a mental home, that's exactly what host Rosie Waterland needed. And Lisa understood that. She was the only person in Ro

Chapter 17: you will end up in a mental institution

Jan 16th, 2018 45m 42s

When a guy wearing nothing but a bedsheet as a toga pushes in front of you in the dinner line so he can get better dibs on the custard, you know you've hit rock bottom. Host Rosie Waterland's was twenty-four, and was in a mental institution. Pr

Chapter 16: your second set of parents will abandon you. damn.

Jan 11th, 2018 31m 37s

Through her time at boarding school and then at drama school, host Rosie Waterland had been looked after by her uncle and aunt. Then one day, they asked her to leave. Rosie wondered if it was because they found out she had peed herself at the l

Chapter 15: you will go to a very crappy drama school and do a very crappy naked scene

Dec 19th, 2017 34m 15s

host Rosie Waterland knew that she would chicken out. She knew it all the way through the rehearsal and all day before the first performance. It was 2006 and it was Rosie's second year at a very crappy drama school. But drama school wasn't just

Chapter 14: you will lose your virginity, followed by your mind

Dec 12th, 2017 41m 36s

The lucky boy was Josh - a day student from the College - who host Rosie Waterland's had started dating during her final few weeks there. After a few false starts, Rosie's path of self-discovery was on. It was also a period of time Rosie realis

Chapter 13: you will try to fit in at a very exclusive private boarding school - and fail spectacularly

Dec 5th, 2017 46m 11s

The next chapter of host Rosie Waterland's life saw her living with her Uncle Ben, who enrolled her in a very fancy boarding school. At first glance, this was an amazing turn of events: from a life of constantly moving houses, situations and pe

Chapter 12: your mum will decide she is a lesbian, and she'll pick her new lover over you

Nov 28th, 2017 41m 26s

For a while there Mum, Rosie and family became a kind of gypsy family, living with whoever would take them in. Living arrangements included couches, caravans and being part of a new 'family'. After a period of moving from place to place, Lisa m

Chapter 11: you will get your first period, and it won't be the only blood you have to deal with that year

Oct 31st, 2017 40m 36s

"There was red stuff on Rosie's undies this morning, but you don't want to know about secret women's business." Host Rosie Waterland's was thirteen and life was the most stable it had been for a while for Rosie and family.. but this was not the

Chapter 10: your foster dad will stick his hands down your pants, and you will feel so, so lucky

Oct 24th, 2017 24m 42s

It was hard for host Rosie Waterland and her big sister to keep up appearances when mum Lisa hadn't been home in four days. After a while, others started to cotton on - including the Department of Community Services. For a while Rosie and siste

Chapter 9: your mum will chase you with a butcher's knife

Oct 10th, 2017 38m 37s

"Joooe... Jooooe! Come out, Joey baby," Rosie's mum Lisa chanted. She was trying to stab at her husband, Joe the Removalist's feet with a knife. Now it was up to a frightened young Rosie and her older sister to go and fetch help. After the pass

Chapter 8: your dad will finally die, and you'll be relieved

Oct 3rd, 2017 39m 31s

Host Rosie Waterland's realised at age 8 that she was never going to be one of those incredible kids on the news who manages to save the day in a time of crisis. While staying with her Dad and Grandpa in Tumut, a fall by Grandpa sparked off a s

Chapter 7: you will get caught masturbating while watching Rugrats

Sep 26th, 2017 23m 4s

Host Rosie Waterland's is now eight, Lisa has re-married and the family have moved out of Smurf Village. For Rosie the learning about life continues, including learning about 'special place sessions'. For most families, conversations about all

Chapter 6: you will be in rehab several times before you're ten years old

Sep 19th, 2017 39m 43s

Rosie's life growing up also meant time in rehab. But the rehab wasn't for host Rosie Waterland's, it was for her Mum. Rehab for adults with children also mean that families can stay living together at a rehab facility while the adults get the

Chapter 5: Jesus will propose to your sister, and not you. dick.

Sep 12th, 2017 28m 37s

One day, Rosie's Mum decided that they were becoming Mormons. Being a Mormon meant visits to church, bible readings and even a special day for host Rosie Waterland's sister. Why did they become Mormon? Why did the trips to church all end one da

Chapter 4: your friends will find a dead body in the bush, and it will be your dad

Sep 6th, 2017 32m 28s

"There's a dead guy! A dead guy!" This sighting at Smurf Village got all the children running to see. Rosie and her sister knew who it was straight away.. and it scared them. Host Rosie Waterland's dad would appear at random moments and how he

Chapter 3: you will be a houso kid

Aug 30th, 2017 37m 20s

Life's next turn sees the family move into a Houso complex nicknamed 'Smurf Village', a place planted right in the middle of affluent suburban Sydney. But host Rosie Waterland's and family's arrival there was not straightforward: there was a sh

Chapter 2: your mum will be a sex worker, and you'll have no idea

Aug 22nd, 2017 42m 51s

It starts off with a prickly question from an attendee to host Rosie Waterland's 4th birthday party. But how is a child to know to all the answers about Mum's personal life at that age? Rosie did eventually work out that mum Lisa worked as an e

Chapter 1: you will be fed up before you've even left the womb

Aug 22nd, 2017 33m 7s

In the middle of the night host Rosie Waterland's Mum and Dad pack everything in the car and flee Sydney to escape bikie drug dealers after a deal did not exactly go to plan. Mum and Dad escape to Tumut, with Rosie in Lisa's tummy and Rosie's b

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