Welcome to our latest journey down the trousers of time with the Lost In Porridge Plaguecast, brought to you by Primordial Radio.

Formed from the daily episodes of the most riveting, edge-of-your-seat broadcasting since Gardeners Question Time this plaguecast is a collection of this weeks adventures in outrageous tall-tale telling.

Our intrepid guide is none other than Dr Cornelius Porridge; part gentleman adventurer, part steampunk stand up, part-time Amsterdam booth cleaner. Armed with nothing more than spit, polish, and an industrial size tub of jizz-be-gone disinfectant, no-one can get rid of stains like Porridge.

Following their recent misadventures on a pirate planet involving death, destruction and mayhem, Porridge and his cybernetic badger accomplice Colon, find themselves with a new crewmate, in the form of the sociopathic Pirate Captain Bonney. Our crew of miscreants now head off into the great blue yonder in search of their next adventure and - hopefully - a wash.

Image Credit: Tom Brown