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Dr. Abby Medcalf
Relationships Made EasyClaimedEpisodes
Dr. Abby Medcalf
Relationships Made Easy
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You messed up, or at least you think you did. Maybe it was a job you quit in the heat of the moment, not finishing your education ten years ago or cheating on your spouse. We can perceive big or little things as crimes that need to be punished
Whether you call it a consensually non-monogamous relationship or ethical nonmonogamy, open relationships can be hard to define. It’s not cheating or swinging, and it’s not polyamory. So, what are open relationships and do you want to consider
If you’re like me, when you think of a relationship break, you’re remembering Ross Gellar on the show Friends, screaming, “We were on a break!” Well, let me tell you, that was not the right way to take a relationship break. But there is a healt
Does your mother make a comment about your haircut, and you blow up? Does your partner casually mention that they’re going out with friends after work, and you get upset and withdraw? When you’re triggered, you have a strong emotional reaction
Adjustment disorders are basically having excessive reactions to some stress (or stressors) in your life that result in overly strong emotions, increased negative thinking and some sort of change in behavior. The key is that the reaction to thi
The vast majority of people find it difficult to talk about money with partners, friends or family. At the root of this issue is something called money shame. To have effective conversations about finances with others, we have to understand mon
I’m not going to keep you in suspense on this one. You know you’re making a “right” decision, or following your “gut,” when you’re acting from the rational part of your brain, not from the fear part of your brain. What I’m going to help you wit
Shame doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t matter if you’re fat or thin, rich or poor, tall or short: shame is an equal opportunity emotion and it’s amazingly destructive. Research has linked it to violence, addiction, depression, sleep problems, e
Jealousy in a moment happens when you perceive someone or something else as a threat to your relationship. Retroactive jealousy is different because you feel threatened by something or someone in your partner’s past but there’s no current situa
My name is Abby, and I don’t like Valentine’s Day. There. I said it. But across the US and all around the world, people are celebrating Valentine’s Day either today or on another special date (depending on the country). Today I’m going to share
With Valentine’s Day around the corner in about 30 countries around the world, I thought it would be an excellent time to talk about Gary Chapman’s love languages. Let me say first that I’m not a Gary Chapman hater, and I think the Love Languag
I know you’ve heard that curiosity killed the cat, but that negative spin is all wrong! We know from the research that curiosity will help with everything from improving your relationships, to coping better with rejection to feeling happier and
What do you do when your partner gets along great with their ex and wants to spend all holidays and main events with them and the kids? You’re invited too, of course, but you feel like a third wheel somehow and you’re wondering how to fit in. D
Here we are with part two of The Five Steps to Having an Empowered Mindset. If you haven’t listened to the first part yet, that’s OK; this one stands on its own (although I encourage you to go back and listen to episode 269). Today we’re going
An empowered mindset means that you make conscious choices followed by intentional actions to take control of your life. It means you take responsibility for creating the life you want and leave victimhood in the past. But how exactly do you do
I’ve said over and over that the secret to a life filled with connection, ease and joy is to create and hold boundaries. And there’s one big thing that generally gets in the way of holding those boundaries: having a victim mentality. In my almo
Hello. My name is Abby, and I hate to ask for help. Despite all my years of therapy and teaching others how important it is, asking for help is still something I find difficult to do and I know I’m not alone! Today, I’ll be sharing the reasons
The short answer is “yes,” but the real question is, “When should I listen to my relationship doubts and when should I ignore them?” Whether you’re deciding to move in together and having doubts, or you’ve been together for ten years and wonder
You’ve tried to draw a boundary with your partner, boss or best friend, but they call you selfish, self-absorbed or even narcissistic! How could dare you prioritize yourself over what they want? In my new book, Boundaries Made Easy (which is dr
Your current partner is friends with one or more of their past partners or hookups, and you don’t like it. You’ve told them you’re uncomfortable, but they say they’re just friends and you’re overreacting. Does it mean you have to break up? Shou
How do you not let your family drive you crazy this holiday season? Boundaries. How can you find peace even though there’s so much going on during November and December? Boundaries. How can you enter the new year feeling refreshed and energized
Have you been thinking it’s time to call it quits in your relationship, but maybe you’re wondering if you’re quitting too soon or wanting to leave for the wrong reasons? It can be hard to know when a relationship “should be” over. Today I’ll be
Defense mechanisms are your brain’s (mostly unconscious) way of avoiding conflict, anxiety or upset. Although they get a bad rap, defense mechanisms are a necessary part of your psychology, and some are even considered healthy! Today, you’ll ga
Do you have that person in your life who, no matter what you do, you can’t seem to get through to them or get them to listen or engage in a healthy conversation about issues you’re experiencing in the relationship? You try to say how you’re fee
Positive communication is communication that’s based on respect and builds trust and collaboration. Although it’s something that’s mostly been applied to the workplace, its goal is to build a psychologically safe space, and that’s something we
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