The football: What are the crucial criteria that must be met for a game to be considered 'good'? The assumption is that the simple answer is goals; but both high-scoring affairs of little consequence, coupled with the old Italian footballing adage that a nil-nil is the perfect result, suggests there's more of a conversation to be had. Any excuse...

The food: Firstly Chinch and Hugh have a homemade cookie-off, and then our former England international behaves completely inappropriately with a merengue. There is video evidence of this.

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