This week we review John Carpenter's Vampires from 1998 and debate whether this is the least likeable cast of all time. Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. Leave us a voicemail by calling 346-246-3143! You can

292 The Horror Movies That Made Us

Jun 3rd, 2023 1h 2m

Mitch's computer is still dead this week, so we go back in time and discuss the horror movies that made us fans of the genre when we were WAY too young! Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. Leave us a voicemail

291 TPM 2023 Horror Preview

May 26th, 2023 39m 40s

Mitch's computer died this week, so we preview 2023's upcoming horror slate and pick out the films we're the most excited for along with a lot of Nun 2 talk! Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. Leave us a voic

290 Scream and Renfield Double Feature!

May 19th, 2023 58m 6s

This week we have a double feature reviewing two somewhat classic 2023 films Renfield and Scream 6! Debate Question: What horror roles should Nic Cage take on next? Movie Reviews: Renfield (2023) and Scream 6 (2023) Final Cut: Movie review sco

289 Evil Dead Rises: Marley & Me-vil Dead

May 11th, 2023 1h 5m

Mitch is back from his Summer Living and travels to review Evil Dead Rise! We debate way better names for this movie and rank where this film sits in the illustrious Evil Dead franchise. Debate Question (9:10): What is a better name for this m

FROM THE CRYPT: Episode 245 - Mama

May 5th, 2023 1h 14m

Re-release of episode 245! We kick off Guiller-May del Toro month with Mother's Day-approved Mama from 2013! We debate the Murderverse, get a controversial review, and Mitch talks about parenthood. Debate Question (5:35): What's Nate's take on

288 Tales From the Darkside: The Movie: Cat Got Your Throat

Apr 20th, 2023 57m 8s

This week we review Tales From the Darkside: The Movie... well we mostly pitch spin off movies. We debate which film segment would make a good spinoff, Mitch debates Evil Dead Rise vs. Beau Is Afraid, and Nate references The Good Son again. De

287 Guyver 2: Job Security as Security

Apr 6th, 2023 1h 13m

Mitch Madness concludes with Guyver: Dark Hero, the sequel that only young Mitch wanted! We debate Ultraman vs. Guyver, take one of the best actor rabbit holes ever, and we say the word 'Zoanoid' so many times! Debate Question (4:15): Is Guyve

286 Return of the Living Dead 3: Ghost of Veronica Mars 2

Mar 30th, 2023 1h 14m

This week we're back with another Mitch pick, Return of the Living Dead 3 from 1993. We debate which 2000s teen tv characters would fit in horror franchises, talk about how Hereditary 100% ripped off this film, and pitch a Night Of vs. Return O

285 Stay Tuned: Dead Lasso and the Kill More Girls

Mar 23rd, 2023 1h

This week we make kid Mitch's dreams come true and review Stay Tuned from 1992. We debate the best tv spoofs for hell (Kill More Girls and Dead Lasso), run through so many early 90s TV show puns, and Mitch roasts Rotten Tomatoes reviews. Debat

284 Leprechaun Returns: All's Well That Dies Well

Mar 17th, 2023 1h 20m

Happy St. Patrick's Day! As per tradition we review Leprechaun Returns, debate the next horror director that should take on the storied franchise, and Mitch rants about bad limericks and Nate's movie score. Debate Question (TBD): What hor

283 The Dead Don't Die: Jimmy Jaramusch Runs Stevie Sturgill Into the Ground

Mar 9th, 2023 1h 3m

This week we watched listener request The Dead Don't Die from 2019. We debate what we do would do as a zombie, ask whether Sturgill Simpson deserves jail time for writing this song, and apologize to Joy Ride fans. Debate Question: What are you

282 The Boy: Doll of Fame Inductee Brahms

Mar 2nd, 2023 1h 1m

Doll of Fame week 5 is belatedly upon as with The Boy from 2016. We give a horror name to Mitch's brand new baby Samara, pitch an American Girl doll slasher flick, and pitch Brahms in a band called Doll and Oates. Debate Question: What horror

FROM THE CRYPT: Rosemary's Baby Ep18 - Congrats to Lisa and Mitch on kid #3!!!

Feb 24th, 2023 1h 2m

Congrats to Lisa and Mitch on kid #3! To commemorate this joyous occasion, here's our classic Rosemary's Baby episode! Join the Texas Podcast Massacre coven as they drop a new single and review the 1968 masterpiece Rosemary's Baby. Show Segment

281 Bride of Chucky: Doll of Fame Inductee Tiffany

Feb 16th, 2023 1h 10m

Doll of Fame week 4 is upon us so we review the 4th Child's Play film Bride of Chucky. We debate the best mid-franchise pivots, Mitch FORGETS TO WATCH THIS MOVIE, and Jennifer Tilly's Tiffany steals the show with the nomination. Debate Questio

280 Puppet Master 4: Doll of Fame Inductee Tunneler

Feb 9th, 2023 1h 12m

The Doll of Fame continues unfortunately with the obligatory Puppet Master entry, Puppet Master 4 from 1993. We debate the best actors to do Egyptian demon voiceovers, reject Decapitron, and discuss the somehow 15 films in this franchise.

279 Possum: Doll of Fame Inductee, Most Depressing Category

Feb 2nd, 2023 1h 11m

Week 2 of Doll of Fame has us frowning on the English countryside with Possum from 2018. We debate the things from our childhood that creeped us out, Nate gushes over Garth Marenghi's Dark place, and we induct Possum in as the creepiest nominee

278 M3gan: Doll of Fame Inductee - Once She's Here, She's Family!

Jan 27th, 2023 1h 9m

Somehow the Doll of Fame is back already with M3gan, instantly the most memorable movie of 2023 so far. We debate M3gan vs. the Child's Play remake from 2019, Mitch corrupts his niece with android TikTok dance videos, and we find entirely too m

277 The Menu: It's a Rare, Well Done Film

Jan 18th, 2023 1h 2m

This week we dine in on new HBO Max entree The Menu. We debate which food in film we would add to The Menu (including Sausage Party), Mitch says 'amuse bouche' way too many times, and there are many food puns to be digested. Debate Question (1

276 Chopping Mall: Prequel to House on Hottie Hill

Jan 12th, 2023 1h 5m

We're back in the year 2023 aka 202-M3gan with 1986 robot slasher classic Chopping Mall. We dig into director Jim Wynorski's backlog of punny adult films, discuss why you need tasers AND lasers, and Mitch pines for the days of Spencer's Gifts.

275: Year End Review 2022

Dec 21st, 2022 1h 40m

We're ending 2022 by ranking our most/least favorite movies of the year, getting excited by 2023 films, and agreeing on another Doll theme month. Horror News (3:30) Top 10 Horror Movies of 2022 (16:20) Best/Worsts of the Year and what's coming

FROM THE CRYPT: Gremlins 2 Episode 177

Dec 14th, 2022 1h 13m

Re-release of classic Christmas episode number 177 Gremlins 2! This week Lisa is back to review the classic sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch! We talk about Gizmo in space, the worst office building of all time, and physics-breaking Gremlins mad

274 Home Alone 2: It's All About Rituals and True Crime

Dec 8th, 2022 1h 14m

We're back with another round of Home Alone where Kevin McCallister gets closer and closer to becoming Jigsaw. We discuss true crime theories, Mitch's undercover mob boss theories (multiple times), and the still the stone-cold parents in family

273 Becky: Look at Becky, Her Dog Is So Big!

Dec 1st, 2022 1h 12m

We're back from a Thanksgiving break with listener request Becky from 2020. Did you want to see Kevin James as a neo-nazi? Well this is your movie! We debate single female name titled film quality, if 'Apex' is the best henchman name, and what

272 Joy Ride: He Who Drives Into the Rows

Nov 16th, 2022 1h 1m

This week we take listener request Joy Ride for a spin we'd like to forget. We debate the worst movies to spawn franchises (wink), discuss the classic TV series Crank Yankers, and rail against poorly written characters and truck physics. Debat