Unapologetically Sensitive

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TITLE 5 Ways to Thrive As a Highly Sensitive Person During COVID-19 GUEST Solo episode EPISODE OVERVIEW Brene Brown said we can heal together during this time.  I talk about how the Highly Sensitive Person, aka HSP, may be impacted right now with COVID-19, but more importantly, I talk about ways we can thrive and really take care of ourselves during this time.  In spite of the big feels we may be having, we CAN make choices to help us feel connected and supported.  Let’s use our HSP Glue to come together and heal.  HIGHLIGHTS I am not an expert; nor am I a healthcare official—this is my opinion As Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), we most likely will be processing more than usual It may take more time to figure out how we are feeling about COVID-19 and all of the ramifications It can be difficult to live with so much uncertainty Empathy overload We may be feeling things in our bodies, or feel like we’re buzzing, but not know exactly what it is We may be more fearful, irritable, weepy, disconnect, using things for comfort (food, electronics, exercise, wine, online shopping etc.) Use lots of mindfulness and self-compassion We may want to go dark and disappear Please check in with yourself and see if that’s what you really need It’s easy to create a story in our heads about how what we’re feeling is too much. This is a time to come together and create support and community We need to find ways to honor our feelings AND consciously acknowledge what IS working 5 Ways to take care of ourselves Get accurate information I’ve been going to the CDC Be mindful of where you’re getting your information PLEASE do NOT talk about your adult fears in front of your children! We adults need places to process our fears—with other adults Find ways to give your kids answers to the questions they ask, but they are looking to us to know everything is going to be ok Consciously curate what you’re consuming When you consume What you consume How long you consume Unfriend/unfollow E-mail/social media/friends Create positive things to consume Things that make you laugh, are light, positive and maintain balance Ask for suggestions for books, movies, podcasts, music playlists Spend time outdoors Engage in creative activities Spend time with animals, children, loved ones, friends Spirituality Plan with calmness Work, childcare, homeschooling, logistics, care of aging parents, logistics etc. Designate the amount of time (when/where you will plan) Plan with a buddy Make a planning sandwich—positive, plan, positive Get support/Create community Zoom call for the closed fb group Many therapists and coaches are moving to telehealth Connect with your friends/family via Skype, WhatsApp, Voxer, MarcoPolo See how your community is supporting others We get a sense of connection through service Ask for help/support—it allows others to feel good and focus on something outside of themselves Self-Care Sleep Nutrition Gentle loving movement Get outside Dance, laugh, play, meditate, yoga (yoga with Adriene) Spend time with people that make you happy Ask for help and support Tend to your spiritual needs—meditation or prayer or time in nature PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS Yoga with Adriene-- https://www.youtube.com/user/yogawithadriene Marco Polo-- https://www.marcopolo.me/ Whatsapp-- https://www.whatsapp.com/ Voxer-- https://www.voxer.com/individuals Skype-- https://www.skype.com/en/ 10 Tilts for Parenting during the CaronaVirus-- https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10156721476846423&set=a.114668386422&type=3&theater&ifg=1 Brene Brown Getting Well Together or Staying Sick Together-- https://www.facebook.com/brenebrown/photos/a.194293500585767/3287297457952007/?type=3&theater&ifg=1   HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Bonus Episode 53   TITLE I Didn’t Feel Seen and Heard, So I Sang the This Sucks Song!   GUEST Solo Episode   EPISODE OVERVIEW What do we do when we tell someone we’re not feeling seen and heard, and it triggers one of their wounds, and they get defensive? Whose responsibility is it to meet our needs? How can we use mindfulness and curiosity when we are feeling hurt, disappointed and frustrated? Is it possible to sit with discomfort, AND feel gratitude and notice the things that ARE going right? And a special meetup for San Diego Folks September 7, 2019 with a free giveaway for one of the Online HSP Courses!   HIGHLIGHTS When we are going through struggles, we tend to want to externalize—find things that are wrong on the outside, instead of going within to see where we need to focus on healing We might try to pick a fight with someone, or we find things that others are doing that we feel are wrong We can use mindfulness to get curious and try and observe without judgment what’s going on Sometimes in relationships we need to sit with the discomfort to see if it’s wounding that we need to work on Sometimes it’s important to talk about what’s going on in the relationship in order to have healing happen It can hurt, especially as a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), when we don’t feel seen and heard Sometimes this is about the present, but it’s not uncommon for HSPs to have wounding around not feeling seen and heard because this was our experience when we were growing up If we have a REALLY BIG reaction to not feeling seen and heard, it may be an indication that it’s about wounding from the past, and not the present When I have a 7 reaction to a situation that probably would be 4, there’s a good chance my reaction is about my history, and not the current situation We often are skilled at figuring out what others need, and we are skilled at meeting their needs This is often how we get our sense of connecting, belonging and self-esteem Are we able to identify our own needs? Are we able to really show up for ourselves in the ways we show up for others? Becoming aware of these patterns and sitting with them, may cause some feelings of anxiety We need to learn how to provide reassurances to ourselves—it’s ok to want it from others, and to get it from others, but ultimately, we need to be able to provide this to ourselves It’s ok to depend on others It’s ok to need others When we are processing things that are difficult, it can be harder to ask for what we want. We have a story in our head, and when we get vague feedback (or no feedback) from others, we may use that to validate the story in our head that says we don’t matter; we’re wrong, or whatever that story is When we’re feeling stuck, there are ways to move energy either internally, with our bodies or in our home When we are in the midst of understanding something that’s uncomfortable, we may tell ourselves that we’re ruminating. Maybe we’re just processing deeply because we want to understand, and we want to heal It’s all about what we tell ourselves. We do better when we are kind to ourselves We make unconscious agreements with others like—I’m going to be here for you, and I expect you to be here for me This doesn’t always work out We may feel we are doing this out of love or generosity, but when the other person doesn’t reciprocate and we become really upset, it could be an indication that we had an unconscious agreement with them, and they broke the agreement If we are feeling resentment, that can be another indicator that the agreement was broken We may feel powerless, angry, frustrated and disappointed when these things happen. That’s totally normal! How do we hear ourselves, so we feel heard and seen? You can make up an it sucks song to sing to yourself We may have fantasies about how we want the other person to hurt or to feel what we’re feeling. This is normal.  We don’t have to act on it We can feel frustration, hurt and disappointment, AND also be experiencing things in life that work! We tend to focus on what’s not working, and we miss the “both, and” When we can see what’s not working and what is working (the both and), we can cultivate compassion and it gives us some distance and perspective We get to decide what is working for us We have choice; we have power We can be sad and disappointed that people aren’t there for us, and we can find ways to soothe and be ok Sometimes things suck, so you get to make up your own it sucks song     PODCAST HOST Patricia Young hosts the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive, and works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more).   LINKS   Online HSP Course-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/   San Diego Meetup—Saturday September 7, 2019 10 am – noon https://www.meetup.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-Meetup/events/264112525/   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
TITLE Overwhelm & Perfectionism - I’m in the Middle of the Struggle   GUEST Solo episode Patricia Young   EPISODE OVERVIEW I’ve been struggling with overwhelm, perfectionism and feeling not good enough. I feel vulnerable sharing when I’m in the middle of the struggle, but the way to break shame is to name it. When we are growing and doing new things, our gremlins will come up. I talk about and name what my gremlins are saying, and I talk about the things I do when I’m struggling in spite of the desire to sit on the couch and numb out.   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out.   LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor -- David Petlansky of Pitseleh Pictures - www.facebook.com/PitselehPictures
TITLE I Acknowledge I’m not Broken; I’m Really Strong   GUEST Elena Truskova Lenochka   EPISODE OVERVIEW Elena lives in Moscow and has a podcast and a very popular blog.  She is an avid reader, and often translates best sellers written in English into Russian.  Elena talks about her fear of not feeling good enough, and not being perfect enough to be on the podcast, but she realized that we have more things in common than our differences.  This is an incredibly insightful and rich conversation, and Elena talks about how she manages intrusive thoughts. Elena demonstrates such a high level of self-acceptance, and she shares the books that have helped her develop these skills.     HIGHLIGHTS Elena talks about feeling not good enough or not perfect enough to be on the podcast Even though we may have different cultures, language, experiences, etc., we all have similarities that we share Emotions are universal Elena has had to learn how to manage intrusive thoughts. She acknowledges how her brain is wired She allows herself to be Elena has learned to remind herself that “I’m not ok, and this is ok.” CEN Childhood Emotional Neglect is common in immigrant families Elena believes that many millennial parents are striving to provide a good life, but they are not fluent in emotional language If you are angry, after 90 seconds, the anger will dissipate, or it will be with you for 13 years I can change how I respond Women can get angry. It can mobilize us to take action “I’m not ok, but this is ok.”   GUEST BIO Elena Truskova (Lenochka) works as a (project manager at IT company named Yandex, it’s kind of Russian Google, really good place to work), she also has a blog with 500+ visitors per day, a weekly kitchen-talk podcast, an Instagram and a blog in a Telegram app with 3200+ followers (similar to WhatsApp but there are blogs without comment sections — a gift for HSPs! No criticism!). She also helps with book translations and also holds online creative writing workshops. She’s an avid reader—she reads 150-200 books a year.   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young hosts the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive, and works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more).   LINKS   Elena’s Links Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/forgetenot/ My separate cat Instagram profile: https://www.instagram.com/fayeeena/   Facebook profile: https://www.facebook.com/elena.truskova   https://tipsfromonerussianbear.blogspot.com — my small blog about non-touristic Russia that doesn't update lately but there are lots of old posts I wrote that still are valid   https://www.spottedbylocals.com/saintpetersburg/author/elenatruskova/ —  my articles for Spotted by Locals website about non-touristic spots in my city that could be interesting for a visitor (everything is kept up to date on this website/app)   RESOURCES   Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers  by Karyl McBride   I Think Too Much: How to Channel Intrusive Thoughts by Christel Petitcollin   Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents—Lindsay Gibson PsyD   Pema Chodron-- https://pemachodronfoundation.org/   Brene Brown-- https://brenebrown.com/   The Highly Sensitive Person Dr. Elaine Aron       Patricia’s Links Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Pinterest-- https://www.pinterest.com/patriciayounglcsw/ e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Bonus Episode 51   TITLE Our Highly Sensitive Strengths and How I Am Working with Anxious Thoughts   GUEST Solo Episode   EPISODE OVERVIEW We need to talk more about the incredible strengths we have as Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs).  I highlight some of these in this episode, and I talk about some anxiety I’m experiencing as I’m preparing to go away to a 7 day silent retreat at a Monastery, and what I’m hoping to get from this retreat.   HIGHLIGHTS I talk a little bit about the retreat I’m going to What I’m hoping to get from the retreat, and what I struggle with Listing our HS strengths, and there are many! Why vulnerability and authenticity is important to me My concern about oversharing, and wanting the listener to feel validated, but wanting to also talk about the strengths we have as HSPs Some challenges I’m having; how I would have handled it in the past, and what’s different now I talk about what my gremlins are saying now—thank you for sharing The importance of naming things How when I’ve named things, I often struggle after releasing an episode How to pre-dispose for upcoming bumps Looking at the possibilities Playing around with our anxious thoughts and using that as a guide to see possibilities   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young hosts the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive, and works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more).   LINKS   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
My son Josh talks about what it's like having a therapist who's a mom.  We also talk about our relationship, and the areas where we are similar.  I ask Josh about the relationships his friends have with their parents.
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 12 TITLE When your kidult is engaging in behavior that doesn’t align with your values GUEST Daniel Young EPISODE OVERVIEW My twins were home from college for the weekend, and my son Daniel sat down with me to chat.  I asked him what it’s like to have a mom who’s a therapist. We also talk about how we navigated when Daniel started engaging in behaviors that did not align with our family’s values.  It’s controversial since most families would probably forbid the kidult against engaging in the behavior.  My relationship with my son was more important, and since he was going to be 18 soon and heading off to college, it felt more important to have open and honest conversations with him about his behavior; how to stay safe and what my concerns were.  I also think I may have been manipulative when I tell Daniel at the end that I love him.  I think I wanted you all to hear that my son tells me he loves me.   BIO Daniel is a freshman at Cal State University Long Beach where he is studying criminology.  Daniel is a talented rapper who writes and performs his own songs.  He is an amazing graphic designer and photographer.  He took all the headshots on my website (and the pic of me podcasting that I use for the podcast).    LINKS     Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  
EPISODE Episode 7 TITLE The 5 Love Languages GUEST Dr. Tom Murray EPISODE OVERVIEW Dr. Tom Murray explains why it’s important to be able to speak your partner’s love language. Most people identify their top 2 love languages. Words of Affirmation-the person needs to hear, “I love you,” and receive compliments. There is a sense that words hold value. This will strengthen the bong to hear that your partner cares deeply about you. Quality Time-giving your partner undivided attention. Spending time together feels comforting and satisfying. Your partner may be bothered if you’re on your phone during these times Receiving Gifts-Receiving tokens of appreciation shows the person that their partner is thinking of them. It’s showing signs of appreciation, and it’s not so much about being materialistic Acts of Service-for these people, actions speak louder than words. They feel loved and cared for when their partner does things that help to make their life easier (washing the car, picking up something on the way home, doing the dishes). Physical Touch—this can be things like holding hands, kissing, public displays of affection, sitting close together. HIGHLIGHTS It’s possible for us to want a certain type of love language to be used with us, and we resent it at the same time Tom believes that it’s really helpful when a partner recognizes that the other partner may be loving them with the love language that is their partner’s preferred love language. If you want to figure out your partner’s love language, you can observe how they respond to other people in their relationships Men, culturally have a harder time acknowledging that they have needs Men need support in allowing themselves to receive in a way that’s meaningful to them When we have parents that don’t provide a rich emotional environment, many times we don’t recognize our needs since it wasn’t modeled for us Improv can be great for Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) to help them be less in their heads and more in the moment BIO Dr. Tom Murray, international trainer, educator, and couples and sex therapist, is a widely sought-after expert in the fields of sexuality and intimate relationships. For 15+ years, Murray has worked with everyday folks to embrace their weirdness, shed labels and shame, lean into anxiety, and build better and stronger relationships. Murray's appeared in numerous venues, including the Huffington Post and The Daily Mail, as well as radio, television and podcasts, including the Practice of Being Seen and Shrink Rap Radio. Murray directs a group practice in Greensboro, NC and holds a faculty appointment at Northwestern University’s Family Institute.     LINKS Website— https://drtommurray.com/ Self-assessment for the 5 Love Languages-- https://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/ Downloadable self-test-- https://www3.canyons.edu/faculty/rafterm/0%200lli%20loveandloss/Day%20Files/Day%201%20Files/5%20Love%20Languages%20Assessment.pdf   Dr. Elaine Aron-- https://hsperson.com/   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Bonus Episode 49   TITLE What Happens When We Get Triggered by Multiple Things   GUEST Solo Episode   EPISODE OVERVIEW Sometimes it’s hard enough to manage getting overwhelmed or triggered, but when there are multiple things are that causing us stress or triggering us, it really can be much harder to manage.  I talk about some recent triggers that happened at the same time, and how I managed (very imperfectly, and the negative, fearful, and judgmental thoughts that came up).  The use of self-compassion is SO important especially when we are having human experiences.   HIGHLIGHTS Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) are deep thinkers and deep feelers. This means we are likely to respond more to things than others do. There is nothing wrong with having a strong emotional reaction to something We can learn tools to master how we choose to respond (which is different than the reaction that we have) When we find ourselves having a strong emotional reaction, it’s really important to name what’s going on This doesn’t mean we have to DO anything. The practice of observing what’s happening; identifying it, and stating what’s going on (naming it), is the first step To me, the word reaction is what happens automatically. I don’t have control over my initial reaction. It’s what happens internally.  I don’t have to DO anything about my initial reaction What I do after I have a reaction is what I call my response. I have time to feel my feels, think about my reaction, and then I choose how I want to respond Often we have expectations that we’re not even aware of. Then when something unexpected happens, we find ourselves upset, frustrated, disappointed, and we don’t understand why we’re feeling this way. When this happens, it’s not uncommon for us to go into self-blame—there’s something wrong with me; I shouldn’t be feeling this way. We also tend to negate our experience because we’re having strong feelings Often when we’re having uncomfortable feelings, the mind wants to make up stories to match our intense feelings, and this often begins what I call circling the drain. This is NOT a helpful place that we go We often judge our feelings, and THAT’S what makes us feel badly! When we can just allow our feelings to be, and curiously observe them, they are not as strong and powerful. When we judge our feelings, we feel worse, and we tend to stay in those uncomfortable feelings longer, and we continue to make up stories in our head to justify the uncomfortable feelings We can look with curiosity—what happened? What came up for you? What were your expectations? When we don’t name our feelings, the feelings can feel bigger than we are—that can be scary and overwhelming We are bigger than our feelings Feelings are just feelings—they come and go We may still be having feelings; that’s ok. The goal is NOT to get rid of the feelings.  It’s to observe them; feel them; name them and honor them We CAN tolerate uncomfortable feelings We can also predispose that when we engage in certain activities, we may feel disappointed, frustrated, low energy etc. This helps to “prepare” us for feelings that may come up I’ve found it really helpful to “set the bar really low” so that no matter what happens, we experience success Many HSPs tend to have really high expectations, so we often feel frustrated and angry with ourselves due to perceived failure, when in fact, we just have really unrealistic expectations When you find yourself reacting, you can get really curious and think about how is it you think you’re “supposed” to be feeling, or how you want to be feeling It’s important to allow yourself a LOT of grace for where you’re at It’s temporary; you will feel differently later on. It’s just a blip on the radar When we fight the feelings/reactions/responses we’re having, it causes US more suffering It can be messy, uncomfortable and it takes a lot of practice to learn to be with our feelings, but there are so many gifts on the other side of the discomfort The more we practice, the more we get mastery over being with our feelings and moving through them    PODCAST HOST Patricia Young is a Life Coach in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPS providing coaching. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. Patricia also facilitates online specialty groups for HSPs.   LINKS   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 36 TITLE Being Vulnerable and Having Deep Feelings Takes Courage and Strength GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW This is a pretty vulnerable episode.  My husband was out of town, and toward the end of the week I sent my husband and message that I was struggling, and he didn’t respond. This really hurt my feelings, and I realized that I have a hard time being direct and asking for what I need.  I wasn’t taking care of my need for play and doing creative projects, and I was feeling resentful because my husband is really good about taking care of his needs. I also realized that I function better when he is gone.  I talk about how we both used this information to create something that works better for both of us. I also talk about some things that I did to shift my energy to create a lighter more playful environment for myself. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice.  Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers.  Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer.  Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California.  We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out.   LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE 009  TITLE Developing Empathy Guided Me To Hear Myself GUEST Timothy Wienecke, MP, LPC, LAC EPISODE OVERVIEW The term Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) was charged and heavy for Tim. He talks about violence against women; interpersonal violence, feminism, learning to have empathy; the ways men are taught to express only anger or happiness and they have no emotional vocabulary. Tim works with men, and he has a podcast that is primarily for men called Stories and Lessons. Highlights 4 Characteristics of Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) D-O-E-S Depth of processing Overarousability & Overstimulation Emotional Responsiveness/Empathy Sensory Sensitivity Learning the skills of how to develop empathy and listen guided me to hear myself I don’t think that your empathy and your explorations happens without community Empathy is a skill that can be developed Men are sexualized to only feel anger BIO I have spent the last two decades learning with and helping people navigate the hard times life throws at us. I have served as an advocate, representative, Airman, Sergeant, mentor, organizer, educator, and counselor. I will use my experience, passion, and education to  empower you with the skills and knowledge needed to find the best way forward. LINKS Tim Wienecke website & podcast--https://empoweredchangece.com/   Dr. Elaine Aron— https://hsperson.com/ Highly Sensitive Person Self Test https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Highly Sensitive Child Test https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Dr. Ted Zeff— http://www.drtedzeff.com/ Feelings Wheel-- https://www.simplemost.com/feeling-wheel-will-help-better-describe-emotions/ Jackson Katz Ted Talk—Violence Against Women—It’s a Man’s Issue https://www.ted.com/talks/jackson_katz_violence_against_women_it_s_a_men_s_issue?language=en Alan Alda If I Understood You Would I Have This Look On My Face?     Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com    
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 17 TITLE One of my favorite stories about Josh and empathy GUEST Joshua Young EPISODE OVERVIEW Josh talks about his perspective about sensitivity. We talk about my anxiety and how it impacted him and what was helpful in how I communicated with him.  I talk about how when Josh was applying for college, at one point, I was asked to NOT talk with him about it, then my husband coached me to only ask him 2 questions at a time, which was very effective.  I talk a lot in the introduction about the mental load we carry when we have to remember all the details for everyone we care for, and what a toll it can take.  I give some suggestions about what worked for us. BIO Josh Young is a freshman at Cal State University Fullerton where he is a business major.  Josh has a wicked sense of humor, and loves to push the rules until they just about break.  Josh loves doing distance cycling, and he did his first triathalon a few years ago.  He also participates in marathon napping!   LINKS   Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Vulnerability alert! I'm getting caught up with the number of downloads (listeners) to the podcast, and I'm feeling a little depressed because I'm connecting my sense of value and worth to how many people are listening.  I'm questioning, "Do I matter? Am I important? Is what I have to say important?" and I'm thinking that, "No one wants to hear about me."  My friend Laura Carr, LMFT reminds me that this is like dieting and getting on and off the scale and feeling good if the numbers go down, and feeling bad if the numbers go up.  My value and worth are not connected to downloads.  My "why" for doing this podcast is to create a tribe and a culture where we embrace sensitivity, and we feel really good about who we are.
EPISODE Episode 13 TITLE Parent Your Highly Sensitive Child Like a Ninja GUEST Megghan Thompson, LCPC EPISODE OVERVIEW Parenting a Highly Sensitive Child (HSC) can be challenging—especially if your child has meltdowns.  Megghan talks about the Shame Meltdown Cycle; What works to raise an HSC; how to avoid sending the message to your child that that they are wrong; how to communicate with your HSC to strengthen your relationship, and effective ways to communicate with your child to build a solid relationship and mirror your child’s strengths.  We talk about the challenges that external validation (reward/sticker programs) pose as well as ways to avoid communicating in a way that increases shame and perfectionism. highlights DBT—Dialetctical Behavioral Therapy Vantage Sensitivity—when parents change how they parent, the Highly Sensitive Child (HSC) will benefit more than a non-HSC, and the HSC will feel better about themselves. The HSC will thrive and do much better and will respond faster than a non HSC. Differential Susceptibility—Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) suffer more in highly negative environments compared to non HSPs. The opposite is also true in the HSPs benefit more in highly positive environments than non HSPs. HSPs/HSCs also notice more positive things in positive environments A little bit of positivity can give an HSP hope, but if an HSC is having frequent meltdowns, they end up feeling incapable and say things like, “You guys would be better off without me.” Or “I wish I was in a different family.” “I wish I were dead.” For children, a little bit of positivity goes a long way Traditional parenting says it’s the child that needs to learn skills, but Megghan has learned that when the family changes the environment and how they parent, everyone benefits The HSC changes how he/she feels about himself/herself when the parents change the environment Shame can be pervasive for HSCs and HSPs   Shame Meltdown Cycle— The HSC feels shame—I’m a bad kid; I didn’t do it fast enough or good enough This is followed by having big feelings—they are told not to worry They learn to hide their emotions, internalize, or think there is something wrong with them What does the HSC do with these feelings—they learn to stuff, bottle or deny their feelings Eventually the child explodes They are given a consequence, but there is no repair work; no tools taught, the family is still not talking about feelings or validating the HSC’s feelings so the cycle repeats itself Don’t tell your child not to worry! It’s really important to validate their feelings!   BIO   Megghan Thompson is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, Registered Play Therapist-Supervisor and Parent Coach who has specialized in working with Highly Sensitive Children and their parents for a decade. She helps parents eliminate daily meltdowns in as little as 8 weeks without giving in or doing a complete overhaul of their household, and strengthen the relationship with their child in the process. Growing up with a Highly Sensitive sister, she also has firsthand experience of the struggles families face when they don't understand the needs of Highly Sensitive Children. She has extensive training and experience working with sensitive teens who engage in self-harmful and life-threatening behaviors, and has made it her mission to build an army of ninja parents of Highly Sensitive Children to prevent this from happening for other sensitive kids and their families.  She owns a group practice in Mount Airy, Maryland that specializes in treating Highly Sensitive Children, teens, and their families. You can find her on Facebook through her group: Parent Your Highly Sensitive Child Like a Ninja, and a link to her free training for parents of HSCs will be in the show notes.   LINKS Parent Your Highly Sensitive Child Like a Ninja Facebook Group: https://goo.gl/yTre1h Free Parent Training: https://www.megghanthompsoncoaching.com/p/5steps Schedule a Free Consultation: https://www.megghanthompsoncoaching.com/p/talk     Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/   HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/   Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”     Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Highly Sensitive People are easily overwhelmed by sensory input (think the 5 senses--taste, touch, smell, hearing and sight).  Bright lights and bright sunshine can feel like too much, strong smells, loud noises or unappealing noises can feel assaulting to our finely-tuned nervous systems.  The texture of clothes can strongly impact us (tags, itchy fabric, restrictive clothing, tight belts or waistbands).  We may have a favorite blanket or pillow because it is soft and comforting.  It might be difficult to tune out noises in the environment that others don't even hear or notice.
Bonus Episode 54   TITLE Being an Educated and Informed HSP Allows You to Know Your Gifts; Know Your Limitations, and to Accept that this is How You’re Wired   GUEST Solo Episode   EPISODE OVERVIEW The Highly Sensitive Person can have a number of struggles, AND it is possible to embrace our traits as an HSP; to feel comfortable in our skin; to know we think and feel deeply and to learn to shrug off things that aren’t helpful.  We often have a greater capacity than we think we do.  When we know about our traits, we can advocate for ourselves and educate others.  Being sensitive is an incredible strength! Enter to win free registration for the upcoming HSP Online Course for September 2019.   QUOTES Being an educated and informed HSP means that you know your gifts; you know your limitations, and you accept that this is how you’re wired   With this Course, it was a very loving and secure environment that allowed you to be vulnerable.   I realized I’m valid; that my needs and desires are valid and my boundaries are valid…people need to be ok with it, or they are just not going to be able to be in my life or interact with me in a major way.   This is my strength. This is something that I have that others don’t, and it lets me shine in situations.   I’m able to overserve things and see things that other people don’t see.     HIGHLIGHTS The Highly Sensitive Person often experiences some of these things Difficulty calming our nervous system Being able to stand by what we say, and not be overrun with guilt or shame (boundaries) Thriving in a world with people who don’t “get” us Trusting too quickly Getting attached too quickly Embracing our “weirdness” Getting tongue tied Comparing Having a difficult time letting things go Not taking things personally Ways to break patterns and make change Name the challenge It breaks the shame It creates room for healing and brings it out into the light Reframing our perceived weaknesses Picky becomes detail oriented or discriminating Embracing our traits Learning how our brains work We take in more information than non-HSPs, so our sense of reality may be different than others We may get nervous before new things, but there are ways we can manage We can use mindfulness to check in I’ve been struggling with how to communicate the benefits of the online courses     PODCAST HOST Patricia Young hosts the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive, and works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more).   LINKS   Online HSP Course-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/   Welcome video for Online HSP Course--https://youtu.be/pGwwfbnuXfc   To enter the raffle for the scholarship for the Online HSP Course, send an email to unapologeticallysensitive.com and put “HSP Course Raffle” in the subject line.  A winner will be announced via e-mail on Monday September 16, 2017   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 23 TITLE How to Care for Ourselves When We are Depleted GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW After having 4 teenagers staying with us for 9 very long days, I talk about how depleted I am, and how challenging it was to be the only Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) who is sensitive to sounds, people and noise in a household of 6.  It brought back those old feelings of feeling like I’m a freak and not asserting myself because I felt like I was being too picky.  I realize that I need to assert my needs and figure out how to negotiate with others in order to have an environment that works for everyone.  I realize that because of this, I haven’t done a very good job of teaching my boys how to be sensitive and considerate of others’ needs.  I always made it about me, and I didn’t require them to be more mindful about this. They kids will be back for close to a month over spring break, so it will be important for me come up with some ways to allow myself to maintain peace and balance. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice.  Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers.  Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer.    LINKS   Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  
TITLE Sensitive Souls Can Be Prone to Addiction with Angela Raspass   GUEST Angela Raspass   EPISODE OVERVIEW We discuss the struggle that some Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) have with addiction. Angela shares her recovery story and provides the tools she uses on a daily basis to be her best.  We talk about the importance of trusting yourself and leaning into your strengths.  Sometimes, what we feel is a weakness, is really our greatest gift(s). Angela talks about the different types of inner critics we have. With addiction, you’re not a bad person, just a sick person who needs to be loved back to life.   HIGHLIGHTS Angela didn’t realize she was a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), but in “kindsight” she realized she is an HSP and she struggled with emotions Angela felt like a chameleon, trying to be a specific way so people would approve of her Angela grew up in Australia and began struggling with alcohol addiction in high school Angela used alcohol to numb the pain; help with feelings of insecurity, and to help her forget her self-loathing Angela felt like she was walking around without skin Alcohol helped her interact with people, without worrying about what people thought about her, and her belief that she did not measure up Angela talks about what it means to be a high-functioning alcoholic We discuss Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), which can happen if a parent is NOT an HSP, and the child is Those HSPs who had “difficult” childhoods have a higher rate of anxiety and depression Angela has been sober for 13 years and she is passionate about helping others Angela got to a point where she could NOT stop alcohol; she was emotionally dependent on it. It can be very hard to ask for help. We have a feeling we should be able to stop drinking on our own Brene Brown says that shame needs secrecy to survive, but if you bring it into the light, you can find freedom With the Cycle of Addiction, you use something to stop feeling bad, and then you feel bad for using it, so you use it again With addiction, the addict tries everything to try and trick the addiction. The biggest step is to surrender Recovery is about stopping living in the problem and starting living in the solution You’re not a bad person who needs to become good; you are a sick person who needs to get well, and you need to be loved back to life Angela’s perception is that everyone at recovery identifies as very sensitive—like people, who felt like they had no skin. There is power in naming what is going on and sharing it and allowing people to see our vulnerability Emotions are created by thinking, and HSPs think much more than non-HSPs It’s important to know our triggers—things like comparison, envy, jealousy Recovery is about needing tools to recognize the emotions that are behind the feeling. You can allow yourself to move through uncomfortable feelings and not get stuck. It’s all about self-realization. Angela gets through emotions a lot quicker now because she honors her feelings, and she recognizes them, which allows them to pass Tara Brach talked about the second arrow. The first arrow is the pain, and the second arrow is the hard time we give ourselves over feeling the pain We need to keep ourselves in a fit spiritual state Angela has tools she calls Bookends and Park Bench BookEnds – are used at the beginning and end of day Morning Book End: First thing in the morning, Angela uses daily Calm App, 10-15 minutes, to do a short meditation before doing anything else in the morning Evening Bookend: Gratitude Journaling about 4-5 things that she’s grateful for, and a few things she did well In the middle of the day, Angela uses the tools of Park Bench. She sits down, breathes, thinks and appreciates Additional tools include being sure she is sleeping well, eating well, and using bookends and park bench Angela understands the true nature of who she is, and if she cares for herself emotionally and physically, she won’t have to go back to where she was when she was using Russ Harris – ACT  - Acceptance, Commitment Therapy is what helped Angela. Actions of confidence come first, feelings of confidence come later You need to practice it for a while before you actually begin to feel confident  What are your values/strengths?  Self-care is important. You need to do the work to show up in the world. Taking steps on a daily basis builds a sense of self-esteem and lets us know we can count on ourselves Some HSPs have a struggle with being sensitive to other people’s opinions When the real you emerges, you can make decisions that honor who you are. Angela talks about feeling like her business was killing her; she was sad, stressed and was smoking. She was sensitive about other people’s opinions, but she closed that business, which was what helped her move to the next level It’s okay to design a business around your sensitivity—to play to your strengths You can use a strengths-finder quiz online to find your strength. Angela’s is positivity. Angela tells others, “You can borrow my belief in you until you believe it yourself” Is your addiction costing you more than money? It is taking an emotional toll? Is it affecting your relationships? how often are you thinking about drinking? There’s no shame in asking for help Abstinence is like having a tiger in a cage, that stays locked in the cage, but moderation in terms of addiction is like opening the cage every so often and letting the tiger out There are AA volunteers to help you  There is also Smart Recovery, though Angela did not take that option. Once you decide, you can look into the “next chapter” – you recognize your values and strengths. Angela offers a confidence guide on her website  She also has a quiz to figure out what type of inner critic you have: perfectionist, mean girl, imposter, etc. Finally, Angela’s website has a guide to breakthrough those critical walls. Angela would tell her younger self that it’s okay to feel things, and it’s a superpower that gives you an opportunity for a deeper connection Angela is about to launch YourNextChapter.com and is publishing her book, Your Next Chapter.         QUOTES “Shame needs secrecy to survive.” “I felt like I was walking around without skin.” “You keep getting the messages from the world that you’re a bit strange, and that you don’t fit; that does hurt.” “I just turned 50, and it feels like life is just beginning. Turning this next chapter is exciting.” “I’m no longer working on auto-pilot. Things are getting better and better since I stepped into recovery.” “Life is so much brighter with emotional freedom.” “You don’t have to do your business by the book.”   GUEST BIO   Angela Raspass is Business Mentor and Podcast Host who supports businesswomen craving more fulfilment in their life to confidently identify and turn their ideas and experience into unique, tangible and impactful business models. She wraps her clients in strategic and emotional support to ensure sustainable growth through masterminds, retreats and personal mentoring. Angela has been self-employed since 2003, having launched her own marketing consultancy at her dining room table with two small children underfoot after a corporate career in market, sponsorships and sales with News Limited. Ideas Into Action expanded into a Sydney office with a team of full time staff and clients in three states. In 2012, Angela decided to pivot into her own Next Chapter, moving from pure consulting to mentoring the rapidly growing audience of women-led solo and micro businesses.   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them in understanding their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online courses for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more).   LINKS   Angela’s Links: Website - www.AngelaRaspass.com Facebook - www.Facebook.com/Angelaraspass Confidence Guide - www.AngelaRaspass.com/confidence Take the Quiz - www.AngelaRaspass.com/takethequiz Breakthrough Guide - www.AngelaRaspass.com/breakthroughguide   Resources: Russ Harris – ACT - https://www.actmindfully.com.au/ Calm App - https://www.calm.com/ Brene Brown on Shame - https://brenebrown.com/articles/2013/01/14/shame-v-guilt/ Tara Brach -  https://www.tarabrach.com Alcoholics Anonymous – www.aa.org Smart Recovery, www.smartrecovery.org   Patricia’s Links: Website--http://www.unaplogeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor & Show Notes: Cianna Reider – YourPodcastVA.weebly.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 32 TITLE Do Therapists Have Therapists? GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW There are misconceptions about what therapy is, and clients often wonder if therapists really care about their clients or is it because the therapist is getting paid.  Can a friend or partner act as a therapist?  50% of clients in therapy are Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), and Dr. Elaine Aron’s research shows that HSPs have better outcomes in therapy than non-HSPs. I also share my own experiences being in therapy. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice.  Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers.  Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer.  Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California.  We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out.   LINKS To find a Highly Sensitive Knowledgeable therapist—https://hsperson.com   Psychotherapy and the Highly Sensitive Person Dr. Elaine Aron   Big Magic Elizabeth Gilbert     To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”     Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Episode 32   TITLE Best of the Podcast:  You’re Not Fragile; You’re Very Strong   GUEST Annie Schuessler, LMFT   EPISODE OVERVIEW   Annie Schuessler, podcast host of Rebel Therapist, talks about overwhelm, and how she has created an environment that works for her, and what she needs when she travels. Annie talks about how she helps others create fulfilling businesses. We talk about podcasting (and as an introvert), what this has allowed her to do. Annie talks about being called a crybaby, and what she would say now to her younger self.   QUOTES You’re not fragile; you’re very strong Annie’s response to being an HSP, “I love me, and it’s absolutely a part of me.” I am strong and I want to be in difficult conversations Another name for HSP—“Highly Percepive” or “Tuned In”     BIO   Annie Schuessler is a business coach and the creator of The Superpower Method For Therapists® Program and the podcast Rebel Therapist. She’s been a therapist in private practice for over 15 years, and since 2010 she’s been helping private practice entrepreneurs build profitable and fulfilling businesses by leveraging their unique superpowers. You can find her resources for entrepreneurs trained as therapists at coachingwithannie.com. HIGHLIGHTS   The card game Annie mentions is called Settlers of Catan (or simply Catan) Associations made with the term HSP—difficult, sensitive, fragile Helping clients identify ideal working hours, what drains their energy, how to make more room for themselves We talk about perceived weaknesses and the corresponding strengths of being an HSP Annie talks about the myths that clients have when trying to decide what their ideal business looks like The challenges Annie experiences when anticipating new situations Having full creative control of podcasting and the unexpected gifts it has brought her.      PODCAST HOST   Patricia Young is a Life Coach in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them embrace their HSP gifts, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia has developed a method for coaching HSPs that has been very effective. If you want to dig in, and move through the challenges you’re facing as an HSP, Patricia has the gift of being able to hone in on the barriers, so you can get straight to work and focus on living the life you were meant to. Patricia also facilitates online specialty groups for HSPs.   LINKS   Annie’s website: https://www.annieschuessler.com/ https://rebeltherapist.me/podcast-grid   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
TITLE Should I Tell Others That I’m a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)? GUEST Arianna Smith, LPC, EMDR EPISODE OVERVIEW Arianna talks about the grief and joy she felt when she learned she was an HSP (she wanted to be told she wasn’t one).  She talks about being strategic about her day and using pacing in order to honor her HS needs. We talk about using food/substances to self-soothe and to manage being sensitive. Arianna talks about her hacks for travel as well as having snacks on hand, so she doesn’t get hangry. We explore if we feel pain (sadness) as a result of having HS gifts, but not being able to express those gifts.  HIGHLIGHTS Misconceptions and misperceptions that happen with HSPs What happens when HSPs are not in our optimal environment The joy and grief that can happen when we learn about being an HSP How to be strategic in the workplace, or in day-to-day activities How to be mindful of pacing when going through the day Arianna talks about hating feeling like she was flaky, but she later learned it’s more about knowing her capacity as a highly sensitive extrovert and high sensation seeker Arianna talks about being in a work environment that didn’t work for her, and needing to advocate for her needs We sometimes experience grief and sadness about our limitations and what we need to do in order to function optimally Arianna said she experienced grief, bargaining, frustration, and finally acceptance When there are big transitions in our lives, we often need to ground into the trait and be strategic in what we do in order to support our HS needs Arianna gives tips for travelling as an HSP, and what she does to make it easier We talk about being hangry and being an HSP Keeping snacks on us can be really helpful Our ability to compartmentalize can be used as a strength when we need to push through things in a way that doesn’t violate our needs Do we experience pain as HSPs when we have gifts that we don’t get to express? In order to thrive as HSPs, we need to find community and someone who really gets us Being called worst case scenario Ari was really a compliment about projecting possible outcomes, strategic planning, depth of processing and forecasting what preventions need to be put in place GUEST BIO Arianna Smith, LPC (she/her) is a therapist and business coach for Highly Sensitive People. Raised in rural Alaska, Arianna learned early on the beauty and challenges of being highly sensitive. Today, she guides HSPs to release the stigma of being sensitive to craft a vibrant, soulful life and business. Based in Denver, Colorado, she provides trauma-informed psychotherapy to HSPs and the LGBTQ community, while offering business coaching and writing services to sensitive entrepreneurs across the globe.  Outside of the office, she can be found exploring trails with her puppy or searching for the perfect Earl Grey blend.   PODCAST HOST Patricia knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, truthteller and blacksheep.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation and compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other HSPs know that they aren’t alone, and that being an HSP has amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for HSPs that focus on self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, and creating a lifestyle that honors us LINKS Ariana’s Links Therapy: Quiet Moon Counseling www.quietmooncounseling.com FB: https://www.facebook.com/quietmooncounseling/ Biz Coaching/Writing: Coaching With Ari www.sensitiveempowerment.com FB: https://www.facebook.com/sensitiveempowermentllc/ Patricia’s Links HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Closed/Private Facebook group for Therapists and Healers--https://www.facebook.com/groups/208565440423641/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Meetup-- https://www.meetup.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-Meetup/ e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  
EPISODE 011 TITLE I’ve been high achieving, and I’ve been reinforced for that; to be moderately achieving felt like I’d lost a piece of my identity GUEST Allison Puryear, EPISODE OVERVIEW Allison talks about having to slow down for health reasons and how this impacted her sense of worth and value.  What do you do when you’re a striver and you’re used to pushing through?  How to set up structure to support having more balance. We talk about being in the sandwich (or panini) generation, where you’re getting “pressed” from both generations.  How to manage caring for, and attending to parents and children and managing medical appointments, disappointing news, and taking care of yourself. Allison utilizes her DBT, ACT, CBT skills to manage high stress levels. We talk about how to see if you’re a Highly Sensitive Person, and we talk about that 30% of HSPs are extroverts and 70% are introverts.  Jaquelyn Strickland has written an article on being an HS Extrovert. We review the 4 traits of Highly Sensitive People (DOES)—Depth of Processing, Overarousal/overstimulation, Emotional responsiveness/empathy and Sensory Sensitivity.  WE talk about courage and vulnerability and Brene Brown’s work.  We also talk about Allison’s guest appearance on Lauren Selfridge’s podcast This Is Not What I Ordered. BIO Allison Puryear is an LCSW with a nearly diagnosable obsession with business development. She has started practices in three different states and wants you to know that building a private practice is shockingly doable when you have a plan and support. She teaches everything you need to know about building a private practice in the Abundance Party, where you can get practice-building help for the cost of a copay. You can download a free private practice checklist to make sure you have your ducks in a row, listen in on consultations and interviews on the Abundant Practice Podcast, and hop into the free Facebook Group full of over 13,000 other clinicians in private practice. Allison is all about helping you gain the confidence and tools you need to succeed. HIGHLIGHTS 4 Characteristics of Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) D-O-E-S Depth of processing Overarousability /Overstimulation Emotional Responsiveness/Empathy Sensory Sensitivity Monthly check-in asking What is important to me? My health Managing stress levels (which is a trigger for poor health) Making sleep a priority Family Business It’s easy to use scheduling as a way to avoid feelings Feel the feeling, AND look at the schedule What are the things that are important (paper and action) Does your schedule reflect your values? Leave computer at home No work apps on phone   QUOTES My worth doesn’t lie in what I create I had to sit with the feeling that people are disappointed that I’m only putting out one piece of content now instead of four. What if people are let down by the shift? What does that mean about me? It doesn’t mean anything, what somebody else thinks about me. For my whole life I’ve been high achieving and I’ve been reinforced for that To be moderately achieving felt like I’d lost a piece of my identity I was driving myself too hard for something people weren’t even asking for I would love to be one of those people who learns from others’ mistakes, but most of the time I have to fail on my own I have this rule—If it’s not a hell yes, then it’s a no You can have frustration tolerance and be tough and handle what’s thrown at you, AND be highly sensitive LINKS https://abundancepracticebuilding.com/ https://abundanceparty.com/join-now   Allison’s guest appearance on the podcast This Is Not What I Ordered with Lauren Selfridge-- http://thisisnotwhatiordered.libsyn.com/27-entrepreneurship-chronic-illness-with-allison-puryear   Dr. Elaine Aron’s website—https://hsperson.com   HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/   Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”     Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
An exclusive meditation made by Chel Hamilton of Meditation Minis just for our listeners, and for those that are Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs). Chel's podcast has over 12 million listeners. Check out her meditations.  They're amazing!   LINKS Where to find Chel Hamilton-- https://audioboom.com/channel/meditation-minis-podcast APPLE PODCASTS: https://itunes.apple.com/podcast/id963597166/ SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/4bSTeVDsXWKQCRptxuZnVQ   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Bonus Episode 41 TITLE Honoring Our Feelings In Relationships GUEST Solo episode Patricia Young, LCSW EPISODE OVERVIEW Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) tend to minimize or dismiss their feelings when they feel hurt. I talk about honoring the feelings that come up for us. Many of us have grief from previous relationships that didn’t work out, but we aren’t taught how to process the loss.  At the end, I give some specific ways you can start to do some healing work. PODCAST HOST   Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice.  Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers.  Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer.  Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California.  We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out.   LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”     Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
TITLE What We May Be Experiencing Right Now That We Can’t Explain Or Put Words To GUEST Solo episode EPISODE OVERVIEW Having words to express (or understand) what we’re experiencing is powerful.  We are in uncharted territory right now, and as I’m deeply processing what I’m experiencing, I’m wanting to share not only the personal insights I’m having, but what I’m hearing other HSPs talk about.  This is to give us a way to understand why we may be having vague, ambiguous feelings that we don’t understand.  HIGHLIGHTS What we may be experiencing right now that we can’t explain or put words to Talked about feeling surreal—like when someone dies Not where you used to be, not where you’re going Rationally trying to explain that there is no death Minimizing Denying Common for HSPs Saw an article about experiencing grief right now—didn’t read it Resonated with me Magic wand and could erase all COVID-19 moving forward and the economy and jobs resumes as they were, we would STILL BE AFFECTED! THIS HAS CHANGED US, AND IS CHANGING US We are experiencing all kinds of loss Ambiguous loss, anticipated loss—less tangible, but oh so real! Routine, structure, schedules Time alone when we drive to work, drop the kids off Job Security Clients Furloughed Healthcare worker—working harder without PPE—more stress Loss/change in income Retirement, kids in college on 529 plan Kids at home, working from home, partners working from home Increased precautions Shelter in home or self-quarantine Disruption of our daily activities—gym, church, synagogue, temple, mosque, spiritual and social practices Overload of information Free offerings feel like too much I’m just keeping it together and what gets activated with new things Seeing people singing, creating, cooking, which is bringing up the narrative of Too serious, can’t take a joke, not a fun person I have depth, intensity, empathy, I’m wired for connection and holding space I’m intensely curious about what’s coming up for me and wanting to find words to express what I’m feeling, and hopefully helping others put words to what they’re experiencing I’m SO blessed to have a circle of HS therapists that I’m communicating with even more right now. We are holding space for each other and validating the things that are coming up. Whatever you’re feeling and experiencing is ok! Even though I knew I was feeling “heavy” feelings, it wasn’t until I was talking with some friends, and one of them made space for me, and I had a good cry. I forget that when I allow room for my feelings, it creates space for something else to move into that space. Podcast episode—release and lightness—giving voice to feelings--honoring We can be so used to pushing it down, denying and minimizing, or the fear that we’re going to come totally undone if we allow ourselves to feel We are holding space in our bodies, minds and souls. When we are able to allow those feelings to be seen, honored, felt and expressed, it frees room for other stuff. Therapy, coaching, online This is a time when we need connection and support more than ever We are wired for connection I’m looking at ways I can make my services more affordable—at least for the immediate present com Send me an e-mail If you’re listening in the future, this offer may not be available, but I’m trying to figure out how to be of service and do the word I’m wired to do—it’s helping me as well Closed fb group unapologetically sensitive weekly Zoom calls free for now Closed fb group unapologetically sensitive therapist’s group—really for professionals and healers who are highly sensitive and provide services. I’m also hosting free weekly zoom calls for now We are the healers, connectors, emotional glue—if if it doesn’t feel like it right now. What do you need today to take care of yourself? Finally client—permission In training for this all my life This is what I’m built for I’m pandemic-ready   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/ Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Closed/Private Facebook group for therapists and healers—Unapologetically Sensitive Therapist’s Group-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/208565440423641/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Podcast Details

Started
Oct 28th, 2018
Latest Episode
Aug 11th, 2020
Release Period
Weekly
No. of Episodes
165
Avg. Episode Length
39 minutes
Explicit
No
Order
Episodic

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