Ask any psychologist, and you hear four words: Penis size doesn't matter. But size matters a great deal to many (most?) men. Why the disconnect? Many reasons. Are there any safe, effective ways to increase size? Yes, but they don't involve pills, potions, or surgery.

Here's why health professionals say size doesn't matter. Any size penis can provide great pleasure for the man it's attached to. An estimated 95 percent of penises are the average size (3 to 5 inches flaccid, 5 to 7 inches erect). Very few are significantly larger or smaller. When women have been surveyed about what they want in a lover, they consistently mention attractiveness, kindness, caring, listening, sense of humor, and shared interests and values. Very few mention penis size. Finally, therapists report that women clients almost never complain about their partner's size. As a result, most say size doesn't matter.

But many (most?) men feel very differently. They've compared themselves to the huge penises they've seen in porn and have concluded: Mine's much smaller. They've received countless junk emails for penis enlargement products. They've seen casual sex personal ads looking for men with huge ones. Men are convinced that size is key to women's pleasure and orgasm because a big one stretches the vagina more and penetrates deeper. And if you add up all the authoritative information men receive about size, it amounts to a thimbleful of water in a vast ocean of porn whose message is that hot sex is all about having a huge penis.

Of course, an extra inch couldn't hurt. If you want to be bigger:

• Forget enlargement products. They are expensive, cynical frauds, every one of them, and the people who sell them are hucksters who deserve prison. No pill, potion, device, or exercise can permanently enlarge a penis.
• Forget surgery. The full monty, lengthening, and girth enhancement, is expensive (around $15,000) and problematic. Lengthening surgery cuts the ligament that makes an erection stand up. This adds an inch, but erections no longer salute. They just hang between your legs and must be manually directed into erotic openings. Girth enhancement takes fat from the buttocks and injects it under the penis skin. Sounds good, but quite often, the result is a lumpy, deformed-looking penis.
• Quit smoking. Flaccid or erect, size depends on the amount of blood in the organ. Less blood means a smaller penis. Smoking narrows the arteries, including those that carry blood into the penis. Smoking limits blood flow into the organ, which makes it smaller.
• Exercise regularly. Exercise improves arterial health, allowing more blood into the penis. But exercising the penis itself is pointless. The sex media sometimes refer to the penis as the "love muscle," implying that like the biceps, certain exercises can buff it up. But there are different kinds of muscle tissue. The penis contains smooth muscle, not the kind that gets bigger with exercise.

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