Jake revisits his low from the last episode, which revolves around friendship dynamics and his shortcomings. Brett presses into the recent and humbling experience Jake had with an old friend, and the two launch into a discussion about the power of self-awareness, safety and virtue when you’re experiencing relational drift with a friend. This is heart-level stuff, but as Jake says, it’s important to engage at this level if you don’t want to be an asshole (plus, Navy SEALs aren’t afraid of talking about their weaknesses for the sake of their team). 

Key Points

• Jake recounts a difficult conversation with a good friend who he hadn’t been in touch with for some time
• Jake shares the conviction that he wants to do better in friendships and move away from utilitarian tendencies
• Brett presses into the factors that led to Jake approaching friendship with utility
• How safety plays a significant role in being vulnerable and growing a friendship
• The power of interpretations and agreements
• The blessing that truth is to friendship
• Why Navy SEAL training includes sharing what your greatest weakness is with your team
• How hard conversations can be a blessing and lead to stronger friendship 
• Why we should try not to be an asshole

Discussion Questions

1. What stood out to you in this episode?
2. Do you want the kind of friendship that Brett and Jake describe?
3. Are there any friendships that come to mind during this episode where you’ve experienced that ‘relational drift’? Instead of diving into a conversation with them right away, pray about it first, as Brett advised. What comes up for you?

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