Julian Redwood - Marriage and Family Therapist
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The Problem We all have powerful ideas about how men and women should be, how boys should be and how girls should be. Unfortunately, these ideas cause us to raise our kids in limited ways that affect their whole lives. While girls are often tol
Raising a teenager is inherently crazy-making. If you look at a teenager on some psychological tests, they will actually score as psychotic! A healthy teenager’s emotional intensity and fluctuations actually mirror a crazy person’s. The compl
Today I want to cut to the chase and give you the five most important things that you should do as a parent. #5 Our Attention (at least for a few minutes!) Number five is to give your kids some regular, undivided attention. I know this can be d
Having a well behaved child obviously makes parenthood a lot easier. Today I want to give you the top five things that you can do and not do to have a well behaved child. Let me start by exploring what I mean by “well behaved.” A healthy child
Obviously, it is really tempting to want to give our phones and tablets to our kids because it gives them the perfect babysitter. They are completely taken care of and we can go on and have our adult conversations and do what we need to do. Par
Today I want to cut to the chase and give you the top 5 worst things that we as parents do all the time. #5: Saying “Good Job” We say “good job” to our kids all the time and research has actually shown that this is quite detrimental. What we sh
The days or week prior to our women having their menstrual cycles can be extremely hard on them and us. Unfortunately, if we do not know how to navigate that time, we can make it much worse. If we have a few simple tools, however, we can make i
When our little girls grow into women and start to bleed, it is an amazing moment in their lives. Unfortunately, few of us fathers know what to do in this precious moment. A lot of us back away thinking we should leave it to the women. This can
Talking to our kids about sex is more important than most of us realize. As parents, we are the best chance them developing a healthy sexuality. If we do it poorly, it can literally lead to a life of bad sex. If we do it well, we can support th
As us men can barely imagine, birthing a baby is a profoundly intense experience. If a woman is disconnected from her body, then she is more likely to have a difficult birth. If on the other hand, a woman is in the zone, in her body and feeling
I know this sounds like an infomercial trying to sell you knives, but what I want to tell you today is actually quite real. There is one thing that you can do that will help you return to your pre-pregnancy weight, save as much as $1,000 and he
Learning to talk to our partners about difficult subjects is crucial to having a relationship that thrives, particularly when it is comes to conflicts. Unfortunately, few of us know how to resolve a fight in a way that actually leads to healing
Date nights are a wonderful idea, but the reality is that they often leave us disappointed. We come from work. We are tired. We eat food and perhaps have a drink. Which makes us even more tired. We sit and talk about the kids. Maybe once you ge
If you are reading this you probably know how challenging relationships are. They require us to have a team that can function through all the intense difficulties of having kids and going through life. Few of us are taught how to foster that ty
There is so much talk in the media about the importance of fathers and so much research that has shown that if we are an engaged father, our children are far more likely to be happy, successful and have satisfying relationships. It is really cl
There are so many crazy ideas out there about who we as men are supposed to be and even more distorted ideas about how we are supposed to be sexually. At the same time, there is an amazing number of us that are really suffering when it comes to
Do you feel like second class citizens in your own home? So often as men we feel disempowered and controlled by our partners. We don’t feel like an equal partner, but rather some lesser parent that is constantly nagged and told what to do. It i
As you may know, I talk a lot about how to create a balanced family. A home where the man is empowered to take care of the children so the woman is not so overwhelmed, and is not having to nag him to get involved. As a result, their relationshi
Postpartum depression is a horrible aspect of having a baby, and unfortunately, far too many women find themselves in this situation. As a father, it can be really difficult. We can feel powerless, frustrated and even mad at our partners. We ca
There are a lot of things to be said about the commonplace of pornography on the internet and in our society. But there is one really clear horrific effect of porn, and that is what happens when our kids find it on the internet. As a psychother
Our sex lives really take a beating when we have our first child. If we do not respond constructively to this, our relationships can crumble in the face of not having this opportunity to connect with our partners. Sex is our way to play. It is
Becoming a new father is one of life’s most amazing experiences, but so often we can be floored by it, and it can devastate our relationship. Like any great challenge, it all depends upon how prepared we are. Here are five things that will enab
There is a dark side to having a child that can be very painful. During the pregnancy and the birth, we often feel profoundly close to our partners. But then the baby comes and our wife’s attention quickly turns almost entirely towards the baby
There is so much chatter about why men are unable to feel and express our emotions. And so many misconceptions about what happens for us. The reality is that men feel a huge array of sensations. Science has even shown that we experience feeling
Gay men often make better dads than straight guys, not because they are inherently better at it, but because their situation forces them to parent far more conscientiously. As dads in heterosexual relationships, we have strong societal norms an
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