0:14

Hello.

0:16

I'm

0:17

Parker, comma Matt.

0:19

And

0:19

I'm joined by Hill, comma

0:22

back.

0:22

For this cast, comma pod.

0:26

squared, comma, a problem.

0:29

My host, comma co, Hill,

0:31

comma back, is a

0:33

a comedian, comma standup,

0:35

comedian,

0:37

comma TV, comedian,

0:40

comma flip chart. And

0:42

I am a mathematician

0:45

comma stand up, books

0:47

comma writer of and

0:49

intro comma duorov. And

0:52

on this cast

0:54

comma pod, we problems comma

0:57

solve. That's all

0:59

I had. That was my bit for them.

1:00

Maybe they can help with your grandma.

1:03

That works. You're that's valid

1:05

grammar. That's a maneuver

1:07

comma perfectly valid grammar.

1:09

I think you'll find that I was perfectly

1:12

quoting Holly from Red Wharf then.

1:14

No dang. Because there is an entire opening

1:16

in o. There's an entire

1:19

opening in, I believe, it's the series

1:21

waiting for God, I think. So one of them

1:23

they're still on the big ship. Yeah. No carton.

1:25

And it

1:26

when they were used to do their little Oh.

1:28

They were

1:29

beginning. Yeah. Little old cup And

1:30

Rimmard does a whole log where it's

1:32

loads of commas.

1:34

And he says, hopefully,

1:36

we'll find alien life. And then

1:38

Holly says, Maybe

1:40

they can help you with your grammar. So

1:42

the guy

1:43

a lot. I somehow out geeked

1:45

you. Hey.

1:47

We all know you're here for the popular culture.

1:50

Yeah. That's true. Media references. I think we're That's

1:52

what I we are brand

1:54

comma a hundred percent on. It's

1:58

fun.

2:01

And in this like, you know, friend

2:03

relationship,

2:04

work colleague thing, whatever

2:06

the whatever. You

2:09

you

2:09

are the rumor and I'm the listener, argumentally.

2:11

You Yes. Yes. That

2:13

comma, I can't argue with.

2:16

Episode comma on this

2:19

colon. I'm

2:21

seeing which utility would be

2:24

most useful on a utility belt?

2:26

I'm gonna calculate the speed of smell.

2:28

And we'll have business, comma, any

2:31

other. Yeah.

2:31

No. You got it. Me.

2:38

Quebec. Where have you been?

2:40

Good. Good. Yeah. I mean, I'm

2:42

I'm aware that this episode comes out on

2:45

the tenth of October.

2:45

Oh,

2:46

yeah. So we'll be

2:47

on our last day in New York? Oh,

2:48

we're leaving New York today. Yeah. That's

2:51

sad. But

2:52

I'm assuming I've had a

2:54

great time. Great time. I'm sure we

2:56

will have had a great time. Yes.

2:58

Yeah. It's gonna be

3:00

really awkward when this comes out and it's

3:02

diet. Do you remember that's

3:03

This was a straw that broke No.

3:05

That broke out of stock. Yeah. It's

3:08

gonna be in

3:08

the storyline of of our working relationship.

3:11

It's the moment of conflict where

3:13

we both go off on our separate ways. Oh, yes.

3:16

Wow. Yeah. But I'm I'm otherwise do you

3:18

know what? Actually, there's one thing that I

3:20

had totally forgotten to bring up in an

3:22

earlier bit, which was I

3:25

went to Edinburgh.

3:26

after the festival fringe. Yeah.

3:27

And I talked about that a few episodes ago.

3:29

I went up a second time. What?

3:31

Yeah. No. Couldn't get enough.

3:33

Oh my goodness.

3:34

Yeah. Had to go again.

3:35

It's not the fringe unless you're there for

3:37

too much They

3:38

say you go to the French twice. What's

3:40

on the way one year? What's on the way back?

3:43

Oh, Matt, it's so interesting. You

3:45

remember my energy the first time? I was so

3:47

excited. it and, you know, you were like, oh,

3:49

who would have thought that you could go to the French without doing

3:51

a show? No. No. Yep. Yep. And everyone

3:53

was having a great time there. And

3:55

then it took --

3:56

Hello? -- getting at the French. Yes.

3:57

Yeah. It was about, like, in the second week, within

3:59

yeah. The second week. Really? And then

4:02

it was in the last week that

4:04

I went up and Natlitzima who

4:06

is a comic and author. She

4:09

saw my pictures from the first time and went, 0II

4:12

wish I'd gone now and I was like, guess what? Guess what?

4:14

I'm gonna again Do it again. Yeah. I had

4:16

a great time. So I was up there

4:18

and what I wanted to say was a cool thing

4:20

happened. My train back to London

4:22

was at

4:23

six fifty in the morning.

4:25

Well, that's how they drink. I was out

4:27

late. You're at the French? Last night at the French?

4:29

Last night. My last night at the French, it

4:31

was a Friday night.

4:33

and you'd never chose to do.

4:34

No. The first time I went up, I kept

4:36

saying, I wanna go and dance. I wanna go and dance.

4:38

Do you remember Patahoots? You and I were dancing there in

4:41

two thousand nineteen? it is

4:42

nice. The word dancing is being

4:44

translated very generous.

4:45

I danced and you moved.

4:47

I moved about. You moved. And

4:49

it's Yeah. I was in the same location as

4:51

music. I'm always looking over

4:53

at the in the same room together. He existed.

4:56

No. Do you know what? Look, I'm

4:58

going along with you for that for comedic effect,

5:00

but I am genuinely the belief that everyone

5:02

can dance. It's just that some

5:04

people are judgey. And so I was like, oh, we

5:06

got a bad news. Capt saying to everyone, we gotta go

5:08

to the they're all in the artists bar

5:10

being imported. Oh, hang on up with

5:12

Cupid. It was so full. And there

5:13

was one other friend there

5:16

who really wanted to go dancing, who was disappointed, and

5:18

we didn't the first time I was up. And so I said, you

5:20

and I are gonna go? Was it good? And then we'll tell

5:22

the others that we're gonna be there, Donna,

5:24

and they will come. So she and I headed there?

5:26

Throw

5:26

down. They'll head over. And we

5:27

got to Patterhouse, and it was

5:30

quiet.

5:30

And

5:32

the music was fine. know, I

5:34

I liked the music, but it wasn't anything I recognized.

5:36

Right. Right. Right.

5:38

And I went over to one of the people

5:40

in charge of the venue -- Yep. -- who I know?

5:42

And I said, oh, who's dating right now? and they

5:44

said, oh, it's a stop number or

5:46

something. Yeah. And then they leaned over and they went,

5:48

do you want a DJ from three? Isn't

5:50

three AM morning? What do you know? This is, like, two thirty in

5:52

the morning. Yep. And

5:53

I was like, heck, yes.

5:55

I do. Yes.

5:57

Sent out the word. Three AM

5:59

took over.

6:01

Oh, my goodness. Did we get the party

6:03

started? Oh, it's great. I played

6:05

iPhone 6254

6:06

fillers. Oh, there you are. Yeah. Actually,

6:08

I opened with Gremmarada. I

6:10

see you baby because when we're a group

6:12

dot, we missed group. I'm out of

6:14

doing I see you baby.

6:15

We caught the end of their set. Yes.

6:17

And so I was like, we're gonna have to so

6:19

I put that on Everyone jumped to the dance floor,

6:21

had a great time, basically

6:23

did that for an

6:25

hour and a half.

6:25

No stop bangers.

6:26

I danced constantly the entire time, Xi

6:28

Jinping. I did not take a break I didn't stop.

6:31

I just danced constantly.

6:32

I switched from alcohol to water as

6:34

soon as I came out RB DJ. Yeah. I have so

6:36

much energy when I'm not drinking. It's

6:38

fantastic. And then

6:41

I was like, there's no point

6:43

going home to bed.

6:45

Oh, no. You didn't. I was

6:47

like who wants to go see the sunrise on Cotton Hill?

6:49

Push forward. right through.

6:50

My initial thing was to drop off the seat, and

6:52

then I realized, actually, allowing

6:55

just over two hours to get up after seat

6:57

and back down -- Yeah. -- and then home to park -- Yeah. --

6:59

and then down to the train site. I was like, I'm being

7:01

a bit more sure. Yeah. So we're not Carton Hill.

7:03

Watch the sunrise. beautiful. So

7:05

now what I'm saying is I need a DJ name

7:07

because obviously I've been bitten by the bug

7:09

and I wanna do that

7:10

with my b h. So I think

7:12

DJ Beach Hill is

7:14

Oh, yes. I'll Beach Hill. Yes, ma'am.

7:16

I can use the Beach Hill. great. I love it.

7:18

Yep. which

7:19

is all I've gotta do is move the space. Yeah.

7:22

There was also someone who recommended

7:24

Dex Hill. Dex

7:25

Hill. DJ Dex Hill. Good.

7:27

but I wanted to put it out there and see if

7:29

anyone else

7:30

So the DJ name.

7:31

Yeah. So if anyone has any DJ name

7:33

suggestions for me, please

7:35

send them over.

7:36

at bake your comedian or beach your comedian.

7:38

Yeah. What would your DJ

7:40

name be? Oh,

7:42

yeah. Elgo

7:44

rhythm.

7:45

Algarism. Algarism. Oh, did

7:48

you have the highest mathematical beats?

7:50

I

7:50

like that. We're gonna have to call it true. right

7:53

now or we're gonna spend the rest of the podcast

7:55

thinking of DJ names. Well,

7:56

I think you and I should DJ together. Oh my

7:58

goodness. And we could be bananas

8:00

in DeJamas. because

8:02

I'm pretty sure did DJ

8:04

is short for the dramas. Right? DJ is

8:06

short for the dramas. Yeah.

8:10

So

8:10

I'll do a tweet asking for your suggestions.

8:13

Make sure you reply to it. If you don't reply to that

8:15

tweet, I'll probably won't see your suggestion.

8:18

There you go.

8:19

Love it.

8:20

What about you, Matt?

8:21

Oh, I've not deviated anywhere. No.

8:23

No. I know what have you been up to

8:24

me. Oh, oh, you know

8:27

what I did do? and this is the power of

8:29

podcasting I mentioned in the other

8:31

podcast that I occasionally do.

8:33

A podcast Oh, yes. So my necessarily Those guys we don't talk

8:36

Obviously, this podcast is my favorite.

8:38

In that, I was talking about the sewers in London,

8:40

and now I love the old Basil Jet sewers

8:43

from the eighteen hundreds. And

8:45

I expressed an interest in seeing the new sewers,

8:48

the tide way development. So

8:50

we've got in touch. Mark, who's a director

8:52

of orbit architects. who were doing

8:55

the kind of public facing architecture that's

8:58

sitting on top of the now reclaimed

9:00

land I

9:01

said reclaimed land built up soer

9:03

stickier onto the tims bits.

9:05

Yeah. Yeah. They're black trousers.

9:06

Yeah. Oh, yeah. The because there's actually

9:09

a whole bunch of them up in on the tims. Mhmm. But they're

9:11

doing a couple of them including the black

9:13

fryers one. Mhmm. So I got a tour of the

9:15

Black Fryers

9:16

Tide Way site, which

9:19

was

9:19

very exciting. So they

9:22

now I couldn't go in the pipes. There's

9:24

a lot more paperwork. You're gonna actually go

9:26

into the sewers?

9:26

Yeah. You're gonna be like Mario. Exactly.

9:28

You gotta find what I could find with the green

9:30

ones. But So there there was plants coming

9:32

out of the middle of the year. Exactly. And there were shooting

9:35

fires, like, So I

9:38

so I'm still keen to actually get in the pipe. There's

9:40

more paperwork. There's still an ongoing project.

9:42

Yep. One day I'll get into get in the pipe.

9:44

But I I could do it at the top of the site, which

9:46

was amazing. So I got to wander around. They

9:48

showed me where they're putting in the different chambers,

9:50

how the flow goes, bits of the

9:52

old

9:53

seawards that were coming out, new bits going

9:55

in. I got to see they

9:57

had divers because

9:59

they couldn't

9:59

get rid of enough all the water around

10:02

where the fleet river empties into the thames,

10:04

which now has to be redirected into the

10:06

new soars.

10:08

So people who aren't

10:10

familiar with the sewers in London, when

10:12

the victorians invented flushing

10:14

toilets -- Mhmm. -- they just repurposed

10:16

the current so hours, which were just the

10:19

rainwater runoff systems. Yeah.

10:21

They've basically dumped sewage

10:23

into the rainwater system, the old drain system,

10:26

part of which was the old fleet river because

10:28

there are a bunch of rivers that go into the Thames

10:30

that London is completely built over.

10:33

So the poor fleet once A

10:36

fantastic mighty river is

10:38

now an underground sewer.

10:39

Oh, wow. And

10:40

a bunch of these rivers, they go through some

10:43

basements like in the city. Like, the rivers

10:45

are there. They're just subterranean now.

10:47

It's incredible. There's a city

10:49

that's just built over the rivers, but a

10:51

bunch of them still empty into the thames.

10:53

some emptied into the sewers, fleet emptied

10:56

into the old Victorian sewers, but

10:58

now they've got to redirect it into

11:01

the new sewers. they showed me where the fleet

11:03

river comes out into the Thames and they're redirecting it

11:05

and how it gets into the new sewers, which was very

11:07

exciting. That

11:08

is very exciting. The highlight might have been.

11:11

And this shows you the difference between

11:13

people like us who try and communicate

11:16

things to other people and people who just engineers.

11:18

because they were showing me one of the big vertical

11:20

drop shafts, which is how

11:23

because you got the Suraj's got river

11:25

level, and you gotta get it down

11:27

real deep into the main part that gets out of

11:29

the city. When

11:30

you fall in a bottomless pit, you

11:32

die of starvation.

11:33

The problem is if

11:35

they're dumping

11:37

sewage into this massive vertical

11:39

tube, which goes down, I don't know,

11:41

like, meters, ten meters,

11:43

let's say, a long way.

11:45

They

11:45

don't want the sewage to have too much kinetic

11:47

energy. just think we can all agree

11:50

you don't want your sewage to have too much kinetic

11:52

energy.

11:52

Well, because it comes alive, it comes, you

11:54

know, it's just lot of impacts. Oh, no. It's

11:56

got a It's getting it again. Yeah.

11:59

on. This one.

12:01

Have you seen Postcards? Yeah. Yeah.

12:03

Yeah. Yeah. So what they do, they're like,

12:05

oh, so we have a vortex to to to Which I know

12:07

what a vortex is, but that does sound incredible.

12:09

It sounds incredible. It sounds incredible. They're

12:11

really like they didn't know why I kept asking questions

12:14

about this. No. Oh, either the vortex. I'm like, Well, hang

12:16

on. Whoa. How does that work? They're

12:18

like, oh, it's not active. It's just like a the way you

12:20

shape it, you can get it spinning and I'm like,

12:22

look, you can't glass over. You can't be like, oh,

12:24

yeah. And here's where the ten minute tall

12:26

crap nadeau. Yeah. You'll be.

12:29

You don't wanna know about the crap nade I'm like,

12:31

yes, I do wanna know about the tornado. So

12:34

but when it's finished, there's gonna be this

12:36

wonderful public space, great

12:39

architecture. Mhmm. cafes, people

12:41

hanging out -- Yeah. -- direct

12:43

like, directly below their feet

12:45

-- Mhmm. -- a meter down is a

12:47

huge multimeter high

12:49

crap NATO. A

12:52

vortex of swirling storage.

12:56

Yeah.

12:58

Wazing. So I'm

13:00

very excited about this. I'm gonna say there's things I

13:02

wanna do now. I'm gonna see if I can go back and

13:04

find out more about this crap nadir because

13:07

what I really wanna do make a video in

13:09

twenty twenty five once the park

13:11

is finished. And

13:13

just be like, beneath my feet, is

13:15

the world's biggest crap nadir? I don't know if he's the world's

13:17

biggest. it's

13:18

gonna be big. Yeah. But I also

13:21

the one thing couldn't see, and I'm gonna

13:23

try some more paperwork to do this, is

13:25

I wanna see the original Baseljet

13:28

sewers. Well, if anyone here has

13:30

access to the actual London sewers and

13:32

I know they're not gonna be as clean as the

13:35

new as yet unused bit,

13:37

but if there's any way to see an old

13:39

Basil Jet sewer line,

13:42

let me know.

13:43

I had no jokes

13:44

except for crap Parker. Stop

13:47

the joke.

13:53

Back.

13:54

Yes. We were discussing grappling hooks.

13:56

Why were we discussing grappling hooks? because I have

13:59

one. Did you have one? That's

14:01

funny. Like a New Yorkies wanted one.

14:03

They just came up in conversation because they gave

14:05

you one -- Yes. -- in Edinburgh --

14:07

Yeah. -- Kathleen Hook. Yeah. My friend Gus gave me one.

14:09

There. That was episode forty two.

14:12

It

14:12

has inspired a new problem. But

14:14

as yourself problems, we cause them. Mhmm.

14:16

So Ben Clifford put in

14:18

a problem, saying that has been

14:20

inspired by

14:22

your grappling hook chat.

14:24

But their issue is,

14:26

that while they'd like to be Batman,

14:28

they are not a wealthy business

14:30

person.

14:31

So they haven't got the funds to

14:33

just put any old grappling book

14:36

-- Yeah. -- you know, they they've got budgetary

14:38

limits. Yeah. They don't have a Batmobile. They haven't got

14:40

a Batmobile. haven't got access to military

14:42

upgrades. that fund. Yeah. or the

14:44

back credit card from Batman and Robin. They have not

14:46

got the back credit card from Batman and Robin.

14:49

Which

14:49

was recently talking about to to

14:51

and friends. And I

14:53

realized that, you know, when you get

14:56

a credit card with, like, a picture

14:58

or something

14:58

like that, you can do that with debit Oh, yeah.

15:00

Yeah. Through your bank. Yeah. Like a custom

15:02

one. Yep. You

15:03

do that through your bank. Yep. That

15:05

means that Batman

15:08

or Alfred had to sort the bat

15:10

logo on this card. Yep. Like and

15:12

also that means he's got a bank account under

15:14

Batman. Like,

15:17

I'm pretty sure

15:18

that the bank are gonna be like, I

15:20

think Bruce Wayne and Batman are

15:22

the same guy.

15:22

No. Dude, just walk in dressed as

15:24

Batman. open a cash account.

15:27

Okay. And I don't know if I think they're pretty

15:29

used to putting the bat logo on things. Is that

15:31

that's like At that stage. That's their whole

15:33

guess there were there were already two other Batman

15:35

films that had come out

15:36

by then. So Was it wrong with them?

15:38

Sports and sneakers, mister Free?

15:39

Yeah. Yeah. It's the one where I

15:42

could go about this all day, but they made

15:44

the merch

15:45

for it before they'd written the script.

15:47

That's so good. A script was just to join

15:49

all the merch together into an era if. Yeah.

15:51

That's why it's so good. Forget hero's

15:54

journey. It's merch

15:56

journey. Search journey. Speaking of merch, we are

15:58

wearing our dinged shirts right now. Yeah. We're wearing

16:00

our Dink shirts. Right? Now for the

16:02

record, we are both wearing our

16:04

Dink shirts. There'll be link in the show notes

16:06

to the merch if you can look as cool

16:08

as we do. We came out with the merchant, then we

16:10

came out with the Pankaj. That's true. But then we

16:12

took two and a half years to get to the merchant, and then

16:14

it didn't arrive on time. So

16:17

anyway, Back to I don't know if you

16:19

remember Ben Clifford. Oh, yeah. I'm

16:21

back. wants to know what one

16:23

utility they could strap to their belt

16:26

that

16:26

would help them stop the most

16:28

crime.

16:29

Ideally, under a hundred pounds

16:31

-- Okay.

16:32

-- which at the moment is about hundred

16:34

US dollars about a hundred euros.

16:37

What's the best budget built by?

16:39

Ben says that would help me stop the

16:41

most crime. Correct. So

16:43

I thought the place to

16:45

start would be working out.

16:48

What type of crime is

16:50

the most common? Oh. And

16:52

then go about

16:53

You're right. stopping at that one. A criterion

16:56

other than cost. Stop

16:57

the most crime. Yeah. So

16:59

I checked the office for national statistics.

17:02

Yep. O and S, big fan of their work.

17:04

Yep. Went to the

17:05

most

17:06

recent release, which was

17:08

March twenty

17:09

Twenty two? Seventy recently. And

17:11

how to look at the most common crimes?

17:13

And Ben is in the UK because all they've

17:15

just quoted pounds.

17:18

Yes. So we've got the ten most common

17:20

crimes. This is in the UK.

17:21

Gotcha. Would you like to have a guess

17:24

at the most common crime. The

17:26

most common crime. Yeah.

17:28

So by crime,

17:30

something arrestable, I guess.

17:33

Or illegal? Legal. I bet

17:35

it's something like most

17:37

common crime. It's

17:39

speeding. That's not a crime, is it? That's just

17:42

It's speeding a crime?

17:42

Yeah. Yeah. that would fall under vehicle offense.

17:45

Oh. Vehicle offenses. That

17:47

is fifth on the list. Wow.

17:49

Yeah. Three hundred and sixty one thousand

17:51

and forty five

17:52

i will thought So

17:54

there's four things that more

17:56

than three hundred and sixty thousand people

17:58

have done -- Yep. -- or been arrested

18:00

for.

18:01

Actually, it's a slightly different question. Is it? Because it's

18:03

not It's not who's done it. It's who's how many have been

18:05

reported.

18:05

It's yeah. It's which crimes are most

18:07

enforced by police. Or I'm

18:10

logged. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Probably, it's

18:13

just like theft or a shoplifting at the same category.

18:15

The shoplifting is not about theft.

18:16

Okay. Theft is theft. Theft,

18:19

theft is second. Oh, so close? Yeah.

18:21

I've been robbed. Two

18:22

million six hundred and five thousand. Mhmm.

18:25

That's

18:25

all a theft. So

18:26

we've got legal offenses at fifth -- Yep. -- coming

18:28

in at fourth violence.

18:30

So one million five hundred -- Yes.

18:33

-- seventeen thousand.

18:36

It's all violent crime.

18:37

Yeah. Wow. Yep. Okay. It's not it's

18:39

not top three. Yeah. That's true.

18:42

In a way, that's

18:43

good. It's better. done a lot. Yeah.

18:45

Coming at number three, computer

18:48

misuse. Oh. So that's

18:50

like Computer misuse. Yeah. Very specific.

18:52

That's like hacking, data breaching. Ah,

18:54

right. Right. US. So

18:56

that's one million six hundred and thirty

18:58

three thousand. Wow. Number one,

19:00

fraud. Fraud. That's

19:03

a good That's

19:04

more enforcement of

19:07

kinda

19:08

white collar y crime than

19:10

I expected. Is it white collar though? What

19:13

was fraud?

19:13

with PH. So that's one of the main methods

19:15

used to commit

19:16

for. That's not misuse of a computer.

19:18

Yeah. Because it can come in via

19:20

email, but also text.

19:21

Oh, all sorts of things. Yeah. Yeah. And then

19:24

it's basically

19:25

I've been getting tons of them

19:27

since the track and trace stuff.

19:29

from -- Yes. -- not the NHS as well.

19:31

I got a message. Oh, you've been in contact with someone

19:33

a couple days ago. And I always one

19:35

day, I'm gonna fall for one of these things because

19:38

the most other one this week. I was

19:40

like, oh, wonder where that was. I went, wait a

19:42

minute. And it was something like

19:44

NHS hyphen data hyphen

19:47

portal dot dodgy something. I'm like,

19:49

well, it's a suspicious phishing text.

19:51

Yeah. So could we be really

19:54

careful of those things? the

19:56

advanced fee fraud and consumer

19:59

and retail fraud was another Mhmm.

20:01

-- big one. So that one, advanced fee

20:03

fraud, fences, include scams where transferred

20:05

funds to fraudsters for postal deliveries. Right.

20:08

There's loads of those roads like, oh, you should

20:10

be

20:10

Yeah. Yeah. money. Yeah. For

20:12

those who had received phishing messages, fifty

20:14

four percent have received messages from fraudsters

20:16

pretending to be delivery companies, thirty

20:18

two percent from banks, building societies, or other

20:20

financial institutions, and twenty

20:22

nine percent from e commerce companies. Wear

20:25

respondents had received phishing messages, eleven

20:27

percent provided personal information that could

20:29

be

20:29

used by fraudsters. That's quite

20:32

a high hit. Right? I can see where they do it. Yeah.

20:34

Good scam. Yeah.

20:36

Yeah. And so I I thought

20:38

I'd actually ask about it because I think a lot of

20:40

us feel very savvy when

20:42

it comes to that stuff. Yeah. When some of the

20:44

scam stuff I get sent, there's NHS texts

20:47

and things like that. I can't help but think

20:49

If

20:49

I am a resulter and a little less clued

20:52

in, I would a hundred percent fall

20:53

for this. I'm terrified of

20:55

the equivalent of me when I'm old. because

20:58

I'm like because we grew up immersed

21:00

in a bunch of this tech, I feel. But

21:02

even then, it's still you gotta keep your

21:04

wits about you. I'm like, when I'm old,

21:07

I'm sick of having my wits about me. And

21:09

the technology's new, and

21:11

I'm not fluent in it. I'm I'm totally gonna

21:13

get scammed. So

21:14

I asked if anyone

21:16

who follows a podcast on Twitter

21:19

has been scammed, especially if they don't

21:21

imagine themselves to -- Mhmm. -- be in that

21:23

position We did have someone who

21:25

works fixing computers and stuff who was telling

21:28

me about an OAP that they helped to

21:30

have been scammed twice in a week. Mhmm. Yeah.

21:32

That was one where obviously, they'd called,

21:34

say, with Microsoft, with various activities,

21:37

blah blah blah. Basically, they

21:39

took her money -- Yeah. -- and then also ended

21:41

up, like, deleting all of her files aside. Oh,

21:43

that's just a jerk move on the way up.

21:45

But the worst one is that then

21:47

she got a phone call the next day saying,

21:49

you know, we've noticed some strange activity.

21:51

And she was like, well, yeah. I just got this

21:53

damper. These guys did this. They took my money,

21:55

and now they've deleted all my images. And

21:58

they're like, oh, okay. we can fix that. It's

22:00

just three hundred pounds.

22:00

Oh, wow. We got the final

22:02

dip. Twice

22:03

in the same week, which is just frustrating. She

22:05

was able to report it to the bank, and they were able

22:07

to return money, but There

22:09

is a surprising amount of onus on the banks

22:11

to stop these things. And so if

22:13

anyone has been scammed, you've got

22:16

more chance to get your money back

22:18

than I think most people expect. If you were

22:20

actually swallow your pride and report

22:23

it -- Yeah. -- and go to the bank. Yeah. You get

22:25

money back.

22:25

now we know fraud. Number one -- Yep.

22:28

--

22:28

most common crime. What can

22:30

you put on a u-two? I mean, there's a problem. Yeah.

22:32

Better to stop that.

22:34

At first, I was thinking, I'll

22:35

be smart and say, well, it's under hundred pounds because

22:38

answer is common sense. You

22:39

got it.

22:40

Oh, you've got No.

22:43

You know, it's about a

22:44

Utility was inside us the whole time.

22:46

Yeah.

22:46

Or like a bunch of brochures can give to people

22:49

that explains

22:49

more about fraud and what to look at. Yeah. Yeah.

22:51

Yeah.

22:52

But then I realized that's not technically

22:54

it's stopping crime. There's not preventing

22:57

it's not

22:57

stopping the crime. It's just

23:00

lessening the effectiveness of the crisis.

23:02

Yes. Exactly.

23:04

So I

23:05

was like, what would stop this?

23:07

So

23:07

I I asked people,

23:09

have

23:10

you ever committed a crime? Why?

23:13

Oh, okay. Because if we can understand why. Why?

23:16

Then we can work out I'll

23:18

read out some of my favorite responses first.

23:21

So Zoe Griffiths said

23:23

they ran a red light It was because they

23:25

got distracted by an unusual road sign and

23:27

was busy worrying if they were following

23:29

the road rules. Right.

23:30

And they said they were in brackets. They

23:32

were caught It

23:33

was outside a police station, and

23:36

there was a police car behind me.

23:37

Terrible criminal, Azeri. They then

23:39

tried to let the officer into the car,

23:41

but couldn't work out cow because they'd left

23:44

the lights on and the flat

23:46

battery had knocked the central locking out.

23:49

And the only reason they were driving was

23:51

they were driving it around to charge the battery up,

23:53

which then led them to answer both

23:55

of the police officers' questions, where are you going

23:57

and where have you come from with my

23:59

house,

23:59

which

24:02

didn't help the situation. Yep.

24:03

They said, punished amazingly no,

24:05

but they would not do it again. So

24:07

obviously, there were quite a few

24:09

things like that where people were saying, I

24:12

broke the law but I didn't mean

24:13

to -- Yeah. -- because

24:14

of this. So a lot of it was just mistakenness and

24:16

I I would argue that majority of crimes

24:18

are not caused by people mistaken. No.

24:21

There was another person who replied to

24:23

say when I was a younger teenager, I would often lie on the

24:25

Internet say I was over the age of eighteen.

24:28

I think everyone can work out the way I did it.

24:32

They said they were caught quite my dad once and afterwards,

24:34

I was allowed to move my computer to my room.

24:36

Ten out of ten would do again. So

24:38

a lot of minor stuff, a lot of things like that.

24:40

My personal favorite was say

24:43

Bluestein, Australian comedian who said

24:45

I used to break into the nursery in the park as

24:47

in a gardening nursery. Yeah. Oh,

24:49

wow. I used to break into the nursery in the park

24:51

across from their friend Joel's house. We

24:53

didn't steal anything. We just remove the paints

24:55

from the Orchid greenhouse, sneak inside, and

24:57

look at the flowers for

24:58

a bit. Actually,

25:00

quite few responded to me to say

25:02

that they had broken the law

25:04

by purchasing marijuana as assuming

25:06

That's somewhere where It's a across the UK.

25:09

Yes. Or somewhere not legal, wherever

25:11

they are. Oh, wherever they are.

25:12

I think in all cases, they weren't caught

25:14

and happy to keep doing it. And

25:16

so I and I thought that's really interesting. So I actually

25:19

went into a bunch of psychology papers

25:22

where people have talked about the reasons

25:24

why people commit crimes. and

25:27

there's so many factors, but some

25:29

of the bigger ones

25:31

are things like where

25:33

the outcome of the crime outweighs

25:36

the negatives. Right.

25:37

Yep. Yep.

25:38

Yeah. So a lot of

25:41

times where If

25:41

crime does pay.

25:42

But then you get more into the whole

25:44

perception of the fact that people

25:46

commit crimes either because they

25:49

need to or feel that they need to.

25:51

So

25:51

it might be that they are

25:54

in a position where they feel stuck in a

25:56

cycle. It might be that let's say,

25:59

you don't have

25:59

enough money to

26:02

have a nice suit to get a haircut

26:05

to look presentable by society standards

26:08

or maybe you don't have enough money to go for

26:10

the type of education that you've feel you need

26:12

or something. also a lot of people can't

26:14

get into education because they're on

26:16

the poverty line or below it and

26:18

don't have access to it because they're to be

26:20

worrying about whether they can eat. they

26:22

can't get a job because they

26:25

wouldn't do well in a job interview from

26:27

that, which then adds to the problem that they

26:29

don't have any income so they're stuck in

26:31

this loop, in the cycle, that a

26:33

current system of society doesn't

26:36

look after effectively. Someone

26:39

committing fraud might feel is the only

26:41

option they have. I know that's not

26:43

always the case, but that is one of the things that

26:45

might play a role. So you got direct factors

26:47

like that. then you've got indirect

26:49

factors where, again,

26:51

someone stuck in a position of

26:54

hopelessness in society might start

26:56

to get to press by that,

26:59

they might because they can't see any

27:01

anything else changing around them or being able to change

27:03

their situation might as well change your mindset.

27:05

So then you start taking substances that

27:07

make you feel happier, that make you feel better, or make you forget

27:10

things. And then next

27:12

thing you know, not only is the actual

27:14

taking of the drugs or

27:16

purchasing of the drugs illegal, but

27:18

also then needing to fund yourself

27:21

to do that usually means having

27:23

to perform some sort of crime. So

27:26

a lot of crime actually

27:29

really stems back to the fact

27:31

that our

27:32

system at the moment does not look after a

27:34

lot of people efficiently enough. that

27:36

they feel like crime isn't

27:38

an option. They're not being offered anything better,

27:41

or

27:41

it's people in a society that

27:44

feel like they don't need to affect

27:46

other people or their property or

27:48

their livelihoods because they feel disrespected

27:50

-- Yeah. -- and not looked

27:51

after in their livelihoods and things like

27:53

that. And I'm including, like, people

27:56

who commit fraud, shoplifting, little,

27:58

small things. Some of the things that

27:59

were, you know, where people were like, oh, I accidentally

28:02

stole a tweet from Sainsbury's do it again

28:04

if I didn't mean to, whatever. A

28:06

lot of people would be more

28:08

inclined to follow rules

28:10

if they felt that they lived in society that respected

28:13

them. or where the laws involved

28:15

felt like they

28:16

were being fairly

28:18

applied. Yep. Because

28:20

people at the moment a

28:22

lot of the laws are aimed at what

28:25

our laws, if anything, just society

28:27

agreeing that, okay, that's okay to do, and that's

28:30

not okay to do. and there's lot of laws

28:32

that aren't in place, that

28:33

should be, that would stop a lot of people

28:36

from effectively stealing money from everyone

28:38

else. Now

28:39

I can talk at length about all of this and

28:41

there's so much more in it, but I'm also

28:43

aware that we wanna know what can go on utility

28:45

basis. So I'm doing some research. I'm

28:48

currently, ever since trying to answer this problem,

28:51

I am now reading a

28:53

brilliant book by James Plunkett.

28:56

called end state nine way

28:58

society has broken and how we fix it. There

29:00

you go. Which I'm really enjoying because it feels

29:02

like it's actually providing answers. And

29:04

one thing we know about industrialization and

29:07

its effects

29:08

on Civilization as a whole.

29:10

Yeah. We sort of had the problem we're

29:12

in now just after industrialization because

29:14

there was nothing in place looking after people.

29:16

Yeah. Add in the looms. Always

29:19

blame the looms. Looms. flame

29:21

the looms as new match -- Yeah. -- look it up. Yeah.

29:24

Well, like capitalism was

29:26

part of the problem, by answer. Yeah.

29:28

We have that problem. But then basically,

29:30

we ended up with social democracy where

29:32

we started forming all of

29:34

these laws and rules to help

29:37

regulate and look after

29:39

society as a whole. but then

29:41

these new markets opened up with

29:43

the internet and all these other

29:47

commerce sort of type things that aren't regulated

29:49

and now we're having similar problem where people

29:51

being taken advantage of. We're seeing

29:53

the way that the old governmental

29:55

system has been manipulated. and

29:58

used. The answer though is hope.

29:59

If you don't hope, you stop trying

30:02

and you stop trying to change things. Do do you know

30:04

that they said that Like, if we got rid of child labor Oh,

30:06

goodness. Every time

30:08

the limits have been trying to put on a free

30:10

market situation, people complain that's gonna

30:13

Yes.

30:13

Right? Every time. The

30:14

idea of an educate public education system

30:17

that was deemed impossible. There's all these

30:19

things where the people in power

30:21

at the time said this is impossible it will never

30:23

happen. And it was through just constant

30:26

pushing

30:26

and urging and people

30:29

coming together and working on it that it

30:31

became possible and that we have

30:33

those things. So if we feel

30:36

like having a society where people care about

30:38

each other enough they're not committing crimes, but people feel

30:40

looked after enough. They don't feel like they need to commit

30:42

crimes. Then all we need

30:44

to do is start believing that society

30:46

could work, then we can achieve it. I

30:49

know that what we want is an answer where it's a

30:51

physical item you can

30:52

put on a utility bill. Right. So

30:54

I've brought it upon myself to come up

30:55

with something that represents

30:58

that hope so

31:00

that when you see other people with

31:02

it, you know that they likewise believe

31:04

that there could possibly be a new future because

31:07

hope breeds hope. So

31:09

I'm thinking maybe a badge.

31:11

I hope belt buckle. You know you know what? You

31:13

know, you know, belt buckle is a thing. I

31:15

hope buckle. I'm just alone. You're

31:17

going for a real practical part of the building.

31:20

It

31:20

needs to be something that everyone can

31:23

either make or easily access

31:25

because I don't want it to be something where

31:27

people don't want to fire it. You once it's

31:29

on the belt, people aren't like, oh, that's my

31:32

No. That's what we've done.

31:33

No. No. No. No. No. And what I would

31:35

argue that there is no one thing on Batman's

31:37

belt that just means that Batman's

31:39

job is

31:40

done. give it bell. You're like, job done.

31:42

Got a bell. No.

31:42

But no. But Batman's got a back deal. Batman's

31:45

got a back deal. actually cared about stopping

31:47

crime. Oh, he wouldn't be Bruce Wayne. He'd

31:49

be funding major political

31:51

change.

31:51

Yeah. A hundred percent. I mean, to be fair.

31:54

Belt the Belt. Problem here is Batman.

31:55

The problem is the Belt. The answer It

31:57

was the grappling hook.

31:59

It's it's the shock

31:59

propellant.

32:00

No. That that's simple. Too much

32:02

of funding is things that aren't necessary.

32:04

No. Okay. You can have some unnecessary.

32:08

You

32:08

you get one back copter? Yeah.

32:10

That's it. Okay.

32:12

I tell you what, though. If anyone's got

32:14

any I'm gonna open this up again because I know

32:16

it's such a big one.

32:17

Oh my goodness. Yeah. I

32:18

can't dig this. But if anyone has an

32:20

idea of something that could help

32:22

people feel that there is hope and way

32:24

of creating change.

32:26

But think that the

32:29

apathy of there's nothing we can do

32:31

is

32:31

an issue.

32:32

Yeah. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. We need something

32:34

that everyone can recognize go, oh, we all

32:36

recognize that there is

32:37

something we can do. There's

32:39

so many things out I know we're not

32:41

on a political podcast, and I'm fully

32:43

aware that this is nowhere near as funny as the

32:45

last episode. But look,

32:47

it wouldn't be a problem squared without some real problems

32:49

every now and then. So if anyone has

32:51

any ideas on how we could do that or indeed

32:54

wants to share anything, get us on at

32:56

a problem squared on Twitter. Comment

32:58

on any of the images we put on Instagram,

33:01

or you can get us up on the

33:03

problem posing page, but choose solution.

33:05

That's our problem squared dot com. Also,

33:08

if you hated this

33:09

Tell me, I

33:11

would I will avoid anything vaguely

33:14

serious in the future. t t

33:16

mask, It's a large expensive societal

33:18

issue. If

33:19

you have ways of helping

33:21

prevent crime --

33:22

We wanna really hear it.

33:24

-- a large structure

33:25

societal change. Yeah. Yeah. Start

33:27

talking about it. Get out of the

33:28

You don't have to tweet us. Donate hundred

33:30

pounds

33:31

to a politician or political

33:33

movement that aligns with the change

33:35

you want to see in the world. That

33:37

is a very good piece of that. That

33:39

would be my best thing on the utility pole.

33:41

And if

33:41

you kind of thought about that down on a piece

33:43

of paper and tuck it

33:44

in your pocket.

33:49

This problem comes from Charlie

33:51

who

33:51

says, what is the speed of smell?

33:54

Wow. It's a good question. Good question. Yeah.

33:56

because we have the speed of sound.

33:58

Yep. That's what we can hear.

33:59

the

33:59

is not a speed of touch. Right.

34:02

I guess we should know what a speed of touch. And actually,

34:04

I'm not gonna go into I'm not gonna into

34:06

nerves because because it's like speed of sound

34:09

is the sound traveling to you. And

34:11

when I did have a bit of a look online to see people have

34:13

already answered this question, A bunch people

34:15

did talk about how fast. It takes

34:17

them to actually to get to your brain and process and all

34:19

that jazz, and I'm not gonna do that. And

34:20

again, I feel like in a previous episode,

34:23

you and I talked about the

34:26

the slight delay that happens in processing information.

34:29

I feel like yes. So

34:31

all we might have just heard about are his friends But essentially,

34:33

we are both acting slightly in the past

34:36

-- Yeah. -- to something happening. Human

34:39

we're we're we're we're slothy messes So

34:41

I'm not gonna go into the biology. Fair.

34:43

Of what's happening? It's the stimulus

34:46

getting to you. Yes. And the speed

34:48

of taste, I guess, is a ridiculous question. Yeah.

34:50

That's true. How fast is the food delivery?

34:52

So I'm gonna just repeat the smell. Getting

34:54

to the body. So the

34:55

smell starts somewhere else and

34:58

gets to your nose. Yep.

34:59

Now at this point,

35:02

people

35:02

are probably expecting me to do, like,

35:04

the diffusion of gases.

35:06

there's a bunch of physics -- Mhmm. -- chemistry

35:09

and mathematics calculating

35:11

how like, the random walks, if if you

35:13

really release a bunch of molecules, into

35:16

another bunch of molecules, they're all gonna

35:18

randomly bounce around. That's

35:20

assuming there's no wind. That's assuming there's no wind. That's assuming there's

35:22

no wind. Blah blah blah.

35:24

In any ocean.

35:25

difference between standing behind someone

35:27

when they fought and standing in front

35:28

of them. That's not when I met by Branyan Motion, but

35:31

So it's such a complex

35:33

question. But so a lot of

35:35

people would dismiss it as a meaningless question because

35:37

there are so many compounding factors. Mhmm.

35:39

But I still wanna find out the

35:41

speed of a smell. So

35:44

you're gonna be the smelly. Okay.

35:46

And this what what'd you call

35:48

me? And this will very smelly

35:50

to smelly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're the

35:52

smelter. We're

35:53

gonna do an experiment and we're gonna find

35:55

out

35:56

how fast smell moves. Something

35:57

over here will be the smelly. You're the

35:59

smelly.

35:59

I'm the smelly. You're the smelly.

36:02

Yeah. I'm gonna put it a certain distance from

36:04

you, and you're gonna tell me when you can

36:06

smell it. Mhmm. And then we'll we'll calculate what the speed

36:08

was. I thought what's gonna be the smell in my

36:10

bag here? I've got all the things we need for this experiment.

36:13

I've got three. These

36:15

are solo cups, like plastic,

36:18

Oh, they look like them be a pong type.

36:20

I I bought a whole pack of these in the States

36:22

because whenever I have a US themed evening,

36:25

a drink beer out of a solar cup. And how

36:27

often do you have a US themed evening? Approximately

36:31

one and a quarter times a year.

36:33

And

36:33

is that like a round Super

36:35

Bowl?

36:35

Or It's this it's every Super Bowl and

36:37

every US election. Although I might do

36:39

the midterms, so that's now one and half

36:42

No. I would call this Gladrap. Yes.

36:44

I did. Gladrap. Gladrap. Yeah. It's a brownrap. What

36:46

you wanna call that. So what I can do

36:49

is I'm gonna add these three cups. I'm

36:51

gonna put something smelly

36:53

-- Uh-huh. -- in one or more of

36:55

them. You won't know which ones smell and

36:57

which ones don't. Uh-huh. I will

36:59

then break the cling film

37:01

holding them down. Yep.

37:03

And then you will have to wait

37:06

to see because

37:07

you won't know if there's a smell or not until

37:09

you can say you can definitely smell something.

37:11

Yep. And then we start the clock, and

37:13

we

37:13

know the distance, and we know how long the smell

37:16

took to get to you.

37:16

Okay. Yeah. because I feel like if you

37:18

knew it was definitely gonna smell like,

37:20

you convince yourself you can smell it potentially

37:22

sooner because I'm sure that will make a difference.

37:25

If our brains know we're meant to smell something,

37:27

I think we Yeah. I'm trying to You're gonna do it outside

37:29

the room then? because Yes. I'm outside the room. Okay.

37:31

I'm gonna one and a half blind

37:33

it. Mhmm. So I'm gonna number these underneath

37:35

Actually, I'll get a shot for you now.

37:38

Matt is out of his chair and

37:40

picking up And permanent

37:43

marker? No. Other permanent markers

37:45

are available.

37:46

So this is gonna be cup a.

37:48

This is gonna be cup b, and this is

37:50

gonna be cup c.

37:51

Is that numbering or lettering?

37:52

It's numbering. And so what I'm gonna

37:55

do? mathematicians. It's three things. So we

37:57

got cup a, cup one, and cup alpha.

37:59

Okay.

37:59

No. Okay. So we got a, b, and c.

38:02

Yeah. I will know which

38:05

ones I do or don't put smelting outside,

38:07

then I will shuffle them around.

38:09

So then I in theory won't know. Okay.

38:11

The smell is gonna

38:13

be links deodorant.

38:16

Oh, classic. Oh, my god. There's limited

38:18

edition. artificial intelligence.

38:21

Links AI. AI.

38:24

I got this completely out of curiosity.

38:26

Fragrance powered by AI.

38:29

What does that even mean? by you.

38:31

What does that even mean?

38:32

What? Decoded by you?

38:33

It's Lync's linear algebra.

38:36

Lynxia algebra. So we're gonna

38:38

call it. Three people are laughing

38:40

right now. Okay. Forty six terabytes

38:43

of data, six thousand ingredients.

38:46

three point five million possible combinations

38:48

and I'm gonna have to check that. One

38:53

fragrance. So somehow

38:56

don't use artificial intelligence to

38:59

come up with a a links or ax

39:01

if you're in the US. Yes. Branded is

39:03

ax body spray. if you think obnoxious

39:07

teenage children -- Yeah.

39:09

-- this is it. So I'm gonna go load these.

39:11

Okay? you're

39:12

gonna relax. And now I feel like I have to go

39:14

a

39:15

reasonable distance from the office.

39:18

Yeah. because

39:18

when you're at home, actually gonna go outside,

39:21

Amazing. Otherwise, I'll come back in,

39:23

I'll be smelling of it, smelling of it. I'm gonna

39:25

try and get out middle of nowhere. Load

39:27

these up. Okay. I'll

39:29

see you in a minute. Alright.

39:47

Okay. I'm back in the room. I brought the cups and get

39:49

my tape measure out. Okay. So I'm gonna

39:51

put you a meter away. Right.

39:53

I backed myself in Wait. Do you wanna come back? against

39:56

the wall. Do you wanna come a meter? Okay. Now

39:58

I don't know which cup is which. So

40:00

I shuffle them around. So don't know I don't know

40:03

if they're smelling this or not. Okay.

40:05

Here we go. Okay. Stopwatch. What

40:09

do you want me to do? when I smell it.

40:11

Or if it just say smell or yes?

40:13

Okay. Or Okay. So just

40:15

say yes. Have a response? But yes. Yeah. Have a response.

40:18

Okay. Gonna open it on ten seconds. So

40:20

I get the exact timing. Okay. Here we go.

40:35

I'm

40:35

not getting any change. Nothing yet?

40:39

Yep.

40:39

Nothing.

40:42

No change.

40:45

I don't

40:45

know how long we leave it before we deem

40:48

this one. I

40:49

think I would have spotted it. So look,

40:51

empty. Yeah. That was all good. Okay?

40:53

So system works. Okay.

40:56

I'm measuring out the second one. Okay.

40:58

That's a meter. Okay.

41:01

Are you ready? 321

41:04

open.

41:12

Not

41:12

getting anything yet. Still

41:15

nothing. Still

41:18

nothing.

41:19

Still nothing. I forget how long

41:21

we left it for nothing? No. I think I would

41:23

have smelled it by now. Yeah.

41:26

Nothing. Okay. That one, head smelling

41:28

it. Did it? Yeah. I can smell it.

41:31

Hold the cup like you did your sense what's facing me.

41:33

I can't blasting

41:35

at that. Not

41:38

getting it. Nothing. Okay. We'll do the last one.

41:42

For this one, Should we half

41:45

the distance?

41:46

Weirdly, I just started smelling something.

41:48

Forty three seconds.

41:52

Wow. Wow.

41:54

Yeah.

41:54

I'm really smelling it now. Okay. We

41:57

just we were just impatient.

41:59

Yeah. Wow.

42:00

Okay. So that one's forty three seconds.

42:03

Let's do this one. Is

42:05

it the same smell this one?

42:06

Give me the same smell. Yeah. So

42:07

would I know? We need a palate cleanser

42:10

smell. No. I'm

42:10

just I'm opening the window for a front

42:12

door. A

42:14

different door. It's a lovely sunset.

42:32

Okay. We have slightly

42:34

aired the office out. Okay.

42:37

Put that in your nose. Yeah. It's on my nose? That's

42:39

a meter. Okay. Got it. Okay.

42:42

I'm gonna open this. I'm lining it up with the

42:44

timer.

42:45

in

42:46

321

42:49

released.

42:57

Fifty fifty chances as well.

43:02

now

43:02

we have to wait till Now we know the last time it took

43:05

forty three seconds.

43:13

trying

43:14

to do some I'm

43:16

deep breathing aloud, I think. Yeah. I think

43:18

you can deliberately not trying to not smell

43:20

it, am I? Yeah. No.

43:29

How are we going for time? Naho, I don't wanna

43:31

influence. I'm still not getting anything. Okay.

43:34

Right. That's been one minute.

43:36

That one did have some smell on

43:38

it. Interesting. I got

43:41

it after sixteen seconds. You're sitting

43:43

right next to me. You're answering now. And you'll

43:45

upwind from it. And I've yeah. because the

43:47

the cups are facing upwards. Forty.

43:51

I'm forty.

43:53

to oh, that's not far off.

43:55

Did

43:56

you get it from last one? Or did you

43:57

not find me? I did get it from last one, but didn't

43:59

unknowingly, I didn't time myself. I

44:01

would say I'm forty centimeters from the cup. I'm gonna

44:04

run the numbers. I'm still not getting it. I'm wondering

44:06

if you move that cup

44:07

if I'll start smelling it because you moved the

44:09

other one

44:09

around. Yeah. I did the other one around. I'm meditating it

44:11

now.

44:12

Maybe that releases more. Is it maybe

44:14

it's the AI? Maybe it's the AI. Is

44:16

it detected and neutralized you as well? Or

44:18

maybe my I just started

44:20

to smell it. Oh. And I think it is because

44:23

you did adjust you with your hand. And I think

44:25

you really wanted it.

44:26

Yeah. We

44:27

should wait for all the air in the room to

44:29

stop moving.

44:30

which would take

44:32

a very long time. But I just ran

44:34

the numbers on, so took you forty three seconds

44:36

at a meter. took me sixteen

44:39

seconds at point four meters. By

44:43

your measurement, the smell

44:45

was moving at two point three centimeter just

44:47

a second? Mhmm. By my measurement,

44:50

the smell was moving at two point five centimeters

44:52

per second. Oh. So they are. It's

44:54

scarily close. And actually,

44:57

you know what? Let's multiply that by

45:00

sixty. So

45:02

that's Yeah. About one you

45:04

got one point four meters a minute. I got one

45:06

point five meters a minute -- Wow. -- to

45:08

to the degree of accuracy

45:11

of this ridiculous experiment. That is very good. So

45:13

smell

45:14

in your office.

45:16

Provide me with that. in a cup receptacle.

45:18

Okay. So smell moves.

45:21

at around about between

45:23

the train point zero eight and

45:25

point zero nine kilometers an hour,

45:27

not

45:27

bridge. In your office. In my office. links

45:30

AI --

45:30

Yeah. -- at

45:31

this temperature and this

45:33

level of wafting. In

45:35

a cup. In a cup.

45:37

So your

45:38

mileage may vary. But

45:40

to answer the question, what is the speed of smell? The

45:42

speed of this particular smell on this occasion?

45:45

Zero

45:45

point zero nine kilometers

45:47

an hour.

45:49

Well, that gets a ding from me.

45:52

There's a rule of thumb, meter and a half every minute.

45:55

There go.

45:56

I'm impressed. Thanks

45:58

for that. I'll spray you later.

46:01

I

46:01

think you're gonna go a ding pong.

46:03

Oh, nice.

46:08

And

46:09

now it's time for business, comma,

46:11

any other, on a way.

46:14

Now it's time for business, comma,

46:16

other, comma any. Let

46:19

me realize I could break it down further. Okay.

46:21

Back. Yeah. had a discussion about when

46:23

a plate becomes bowl and when a bowl is a plate.

46:26

Yes. And we got variety of responses

46:28

from people. Look, honestly, some of them

46:30

just people's opinions. That's

46:32

because we got a lot of opinions.

46:33

Yeah. Not necessarily ones

46:36

worth commenting on. I would say

46:38

what I did like was Marcel Marcel's

46:41

response was the solution to

46:43

the bolus plate debate is clearly the same

46:45

solution as the ballroom problem, which

46:47

was on a previous

46:48

episode. When does a room become a hall and when is

46:50

a hall of room?

46:51

Yes. Yeah. And so it depends

46:53

what you put in it. So

46:55

if you put a soup in it, it's a bowl. Yeah.

46:57

So if you put soup on a plate a bowl. And

46:59

if you put a slice of pizza in a bowl, it's

47:00

plate. 000I

47:04

wanted

47:04

to disagree with that, but think I might agree.

47:07

Oh,

47:07

that's terrifying. What you reckon

47:09

if you have a bowl of pizza? That's

47:10

I would say if I if I wanted to eat

47:13

pizza and I had to put it down somewhere. only a bowl.

47:15

I would say, and this is like, what are you doing?

47:17

I'd say, I'm just using this bowl as

47:20

a plate. Yeah. This was

47:22

a plate. I'm using it as a plate.

47:23

But does that make it a plate? I

47:25

guess temporarily it does.

47:26

I'm using this bowl. It

47:28

is a bowl that I'm using as a plate.

47:30

No. I've gone back to my first instinct. I don't buy

47:32

that. Oh, it's syllable. Interestingly,

47:34

Loubert, it's spelled

47:36

late late late late speaker l zero natek,

47:39

said if you wish to sort crop range two categories,

47:42

I think a decent distinguisher for plates versus

47:44

bowls is that if you consider yourself

47:46

to be putting something on it, then it's a plate

47:49

Whereas

47:49

if you're putting something in it, then it's a

47:51

bowl. So if

47:53

you said I'm putting the slice of pizza in

47:55

this receptacle,

47:56

It's about this. But

47:58

if you said I'm going to say something to on this.

48:00

That's like the difference between a bus

48:02

and a van. You

48:04

get into a van. but you get

48:06

onto a bus. I

48:07

think that's interesting because

48:09

that's a sort of thing where just your natural

48:12

instinct might

48:13

lead the way.

48:14

Say Because

48:15

if I put a piece of size of pizza, I'm already

48:17

saying it. I put a size of pizza in a bowl

48:20

like to use it as a plate.

48:21

If I if I was using the bowl as a plate, I

48:23

would still say it's in there. I wouldn't say,

48:25

is it how much of the food appears

48:28

outside of the receptacle now. Don't

48:30

know if the answer can be ask your subconscious.

48:33

Why

48:33

not? You should be more already know. The

48:36

answer was in you the whole time. Yay. I'm on

48:38

you. Thank you. Yeah.

48:39

I'm a plate. They

48:43

also said bonus third category would

48:45

be cups. And I

48:46

think the line from bolder cup is crossed when you can

48:48

no longer put a spoon in all the way to the bottom

48:50

at such an angle for it to scoop out liquid.

48:52

but the remaining is level. No.

48:55

Yeah.

48:55

There was some really interesting stuff there.

48:57

Nicole said it's definitely on

48:59

Patreon said it's definitely a plate, but one for

49:01

catching messy good. I think they meant

49:03

messy food, but I like to

49:04

think messy good. It's a bit like chaotic

49:06

good. So, yes, it's chaotic neutral

49:08

bowl.

49:09

Yeah. Now they said if you tried soup

49:11

in that, I think referring to the picture of

49:13

the dish that I held up in the image

49:15

when I was recovered, they said you'd be scraping the

49:17

bottom the whole time. incorrect, Nicole. In fact,

49:20

we have and do sometimes use those dishes

49:22

for soup -- Yeah.

49:23

-- because I like to rest my toast on

49:25

the rim.

49:26

I've never known you to script the bottle of anything.

49:28

Also, on Patreon, someone said,

49:31

and other people agree with them. Christ

49:33

fan Villegan, I think.

49:35

I've just pronounced that. I'm very sorry. They say

49:38

in Dutch, they call it

49:40

a deep plate Oh.

49:43

Which I commented is just refusing

49:45

to pick a side.

49:46

Also,

49:47

then one plate. I

49:49

then I want to know

49:51

What what's the crossover there?

49:53

It's shallow

49:53

bowl. Come on. Yeah.

49:54

Yeah. Exactly. When A deep When

49:56

what's the difference between shallow bowl and a deep

49:58

play a deep board.

49:59

But we did do the ball poll.

50:01

The ball poll.

50:02

The ball poll on Twitter, we Oh,

50:04

on the ball poll. We asked

50:06

You are listening to one followers. It's

50:09

the sole bowl bowl.

50:10

Based on the things that we were discussing in

50:12

the episode, when does a plate become a bowl?

50:14

which was the amount of central

50:16

surface with curves rim

50:18

discounted. Yep. The amount of central

50:20

surface with curves rim countered. Mhmm.

50:23

when the depression is the depths of a spoon

50:25

test. spoon test.

50:27

And

50:28

To say that the people are wrong,

50:30

Did you not

50:32

agree? I did not agree. We've

50:34

had surface curves with rim,

50:36

nineteen point nine percent Service

50:38

curves with no rim, twenty nine point

50:40

seven percent, but winning with

50:42

this

50:42

staggering majority and absolute majority.

50:45

Four percent -- Ridiculous. -- the

50:47

spoon test.

50:48

Wow.

50:50

Yeah. Verint,

50:51

I mean, the people As we know the polls listened

50:53

as a spoken.

50:53

Yeah. But they might be wrong. If there is if

50:56

there is a professional out there. You ever

50:58

settled it with a dentist in the last one?

51:00

Yep. If anyone can come

51:02

in with a an

51:04

argument by authority, let us know. until

51:06

then. Any crockery experts? Yeah.

51:08

Until then, it's the spoon test.

51:10

I'm okay with that. I've made peace with

51:12

the spoon test. I still

51:14

wanna know what point it becomes a hat. In terms

51:16

of any other AOB, I

51:18

mentioned my ongoing project

51:21

to break the word record for the most steps the slinky

51:23

has gone down. Yes. And I said

51:25

I'd found some candidate steps in

51:27

Finland, which were fine but not great.

51:29

We've had two types of help come in. a

51:31

lot of people have suggested other

51:34

sets of stairs. Yeah.

51:35

When you say two kinds of help, do you mean the ones

51:37

that are actually used for the ones where they have not listened

51:39

to the

51:39

That specification as you require. Let me

51:42

rephrase. Three types of help.

51:44

The zeros type, not help.

51:46

The first type, people suggesting

51:48

other sets of stairs. Mhmm. Several people mentioned

51:51

ski slopes having stairs to go up them,

51:53

like artificial ski slopes. But

51:55

the ones I looked at online and specifically

51:57

They're gonna be quite deep,

51:59

aren't they to allow for skis?

52:01

This is it. But often

52:03

they like the access repair steps. Oh,

52:05

I can't go alongside, but they are often

52:07

very deep and the ones I looked at vary.

52:10

And

52:10

so there was a

52:12

ski jumping hell in Norway,

52:15

which

52:15

apparently has around six hundred steps.

52:18

But when I looked online, they're

52:20

varying depth. Mhmm. So I wish and

52:22

there's no landings though. but they're not

52:24

consistent. And so a few people pitch different variations

52:26

on that. Some people mentioned other like castles

52:29

with nearly a hundred steps For example,

52:32

Adam on the problem posing page put

52:34

through the solution of Fatfoot Castle

52:36

Mountain has around ninety

52:38

steps Depends how you count the first

52:40

or last step, classic problem. Mhmm.

52:42

However, I think the winning suggestion

52:45

is the lion's Mound Monument

52:48

in Belgium.

52:50

That is where the Battle of Waterloo happened.

52:52

This was built in the early eighteen hundreds,

52:54

so post bad.

52:55

Well, it wasn't like in the eighteen twenties. So

52:58

it's new enough to have well engineered

53:00

steps, but old enough they didn't care

53:02

about health and safety. Two hundred

53:04

and twenty six steps. Okay.

53:06

Which is good. Yeah.

53:08

And looking at them,

53:10

in

53:10

photos, they look very regular.

53:14

And I think they're gonna be like a

53:16

nice generous gradient.

53:18

So what I really need now is

53:21

it's not prepared to go there and measure the

53:23

steps and have a look at them. I

53:25

need an eyewitness account. I could go to

53:27

Belgium, but that Where in Belgium again?

53:29

I'm not sure. It's wherever Waterloo took

53:32

place. Okay. because I might be

53:34

in Belgium at the end of October. Oh, that's relevant

53:36

information. Yeah. Okay. So

53:39

we'll check if that's gonna be close. If

53:41

anyone is in Belgium happens to be

53:43

there before the end of October, Yeah. And

53:45

can go and measure these steps. Let us

53:47

know we don't wanna duplicate effort. So

53:49

if you wanna get in touch, oh, just do it. Yeah.

53:51

What I wanna know is

53:54

the average height, the average

53:56

run, and how much variation are we talking?

53:58

Like, what's the smallest? What's biggest? You don't have to measure

54:00

all two hundred twenty six A sample

54:02

of a couple in different places is enough and

54:04

eyeballed the rest. So that would be great.

54:07

I feel like that's a good candidate.

54:09

and it's close enough to the UK. I can get there.

54:12

The other type of help is

54:14

someone got in touch with

54:16

a company that can make custom slinkies.

54:19

So that's

54:21

very exciting. They normally

54:23

manufacture car parts.

54:25

They're an order manufacturer, but

54:28

they have made custom slinkies as like a

54:30

swag giveaway. Right. And so

54:34

one of the people who use them as a supplier

54:36

told me about them and put me in touch, and they've

54:38

said yes. They can't guarantee

54:40

they'll do it. But if I work out the specs I

54:42

need, they'll see if they can manufacture that slinky for me.

54:44

Oh, wow. So if we end up with a set of

54:46

stairs where

54:47

an off the shelf slinky is not gonna do it, we'll get

54:49

a custom one made. So good job

54:51

listeners. but your job has not yet done.

54:54

Let's measure those steps.

54:56

Measure those steps.

55:00

Thank you all very much for listening.

55:02

And don't forget, there is a hierarchy to our listeners,

55:04

our absolute favorites, are

55:05

the ones who measure steps for us

55:08

in

55:08

Belgium? yeah, closely followed

55:10

by all of you. We love you all, but particularly the people

55:12

who support us on Patreon because they make

55:15

this whole thing happen. We pick

55:17

three of our Patreon supporters

55:19

at random and truly at random,

55:22

so people

55:23

will reappear in this list

55:25

if we wait Yeah. Long enough. This

55:27

time we would like to thank.

55:29

James Haim or Higgum.

55:33

Johannes or Johannes Or Johannes

55:35

Orland.

55:37

And

55:38

Steve Charlewood. Charlewood?

55:40

Charlewood. Charlewood. Charlewood.

55:45

We

55:45

love you all.

55:46

We do.

55:47

This cast comma pod. Oh,

55:50

gosh. You're doing that on

55:52

the way out. I'm gonna I'm gonna bookend

55:54

it. squared

55:57

comma a problem

56:00

was

56:00

brought to you by

56:01

me. Parker comma Matt.

56:03

my host, comma, comma, comma,

56:05

back,

56:10

producer, Carter, Armstrong,

56:12

comma, Lauren, You,

56:14

comma thank. Listening, comma

56:17

four.

56:31

So Matt.

56:32

Back.

56:33

We ran out of thankfully,

56:36

we

56:36

got -- Thank goodness. -- all the stale all

56:38

the stale snack been cleared out. Snacks.

56:42

We

56:42

do know your card.

56:44

I may have found

56:45

Oh, no. What? No. For

56:47

the

56:47

record Becca's now walking across the room

56:49

to her rucksack. She's

56:52

pulling out a pack of oh my goodness

56:54

watsets crunchy, really

56:57

cheesy. So it's

56:59

a large pack of walkers' watsets. We

57:02

Have we haven't done these yet? Have we? No.

57:05

Really cheesy flavor corn puffs.

57:07

Compuffs. Best

57:09

before,

57:11

November this year. Yeah. They're

57:13

in date. They're in date. I

57:15

reached out to

57:16

say to people like Twisties or like Knick

57:18

Knacks, but what's it mix together, but these

57:20

appear from the packet to be nicknack.

57:24

Shake. I'm going in. They

57:26

smell. I'm

57:26

trying to see if I can smell them.

57:28

like,

57:30

links AI. It doesn't reach there. It does

57:32

everything in the room right now. Hang

57:34

on. If I bury my face in this, That's

57:37

very twisty. Or is it? Yeah.

57:40

Smells oily. Wait.

57:43

Twisty is really oily.

57:44

I can tell mate twisties have a real

57:46

strong.

57:46

Okay. I've got a I've got a wee handful. Here go.

57:49

Oh, you're only going to

57:50

go for oh, his face, his eyes just

57:52

went very wide. That's close. It

57:55

is close.

57:56

It's got a sort of muted

57:58

flavor more. I feel like twisty

57:59

is a very salty.

58:01

This is a bit more

58:01

they'll hit you much harder.

58:03

Yeah. This is this introduces

58:05

itself first.

58:06

Yeah. It doesn't hang around for long.

58:08

Yeah. Whereas, Triste's is like, I'm here.

58:10

Yeah. These are a little more powdery. Do you want

58:12

these are more British? Man, these are more British.

58:15

It's

58:18

like Twisties, but they've been living here for seventeen

58:20

years. I

58:23

wanna keep eating these. Yeah. Alright.

58:25

Well, we'll keep doing that. and I'll let the listeners

58:28

have some time. Who knows what we found in America?