0:00

My name is Alex, and sometimes I absolutely

0:03

hate social media. Nor

0:07

no, al right,

0:10

will be alright forever, No,

0:15

be alright, alright,

0:20

we'll be alrights ever, what

0:24

is up, y'all? You thought we were done, We're not.

0:26

We never die. We are here right

0:28

now. We had to do an extra episode

0:30

because the way that we do this podcast,

0:32

um, is that I get to talk to Catherine, who shout

0:34

outs to Catherine as we end this season, like just

0:37

absolutely fantastic and work

0:39

so hard on this podcast, Like you're you're just absolutely

0:42

I know you can hear me right now, and you're gonna have to edit

0:44

this and you can't cut this out. I'm not gonna

0:46

let you. But you're absolutely fantastic,

0:49

um. And and it's just so much fun. But we just talk

0:51

about what we want to talk about. So we're like, you know what,

0:53

let's give him a bonus episode. And this episode

0:55

is going to be talking about Instagram. And I

0:57

want to preface this whole thing because I'm very,

0:59

very ucky that I that I've been able to

1:02

build an amazing group of people

1:04

who support this journey that I'm on, especially

1:07

on Instagram. UM, So I don't want this

1:09

to be me kind of

1:11

looking this gift horse in the mouth and

1:13

and just pretending that it's not

1:16

an awesome thing that can be used in an amazing

1:18

way. But I think it was very important

1:20

to me and to Catherine to talk about

1:23

the reality of the negative

1:25

aspects of social media, especially

1:27

Instagram. I will be the first

1:29

one on this podcast to say I'm

1:31

gonna I'm just gonna come out and say it. I face tuned

1:34

my photos sometimes I still

1:36

do. I still do to this day if I

1:38

have like a big pimple on my forehead, or

1:40

if I feel a little bit bloated or this

1:42

or that, and I do it. And it's the worst

1:44

thing because I don't know what makes me do it.

1:47

But everybody that I talked to also

1:49

does it, and we all do it. And it was

1:51

just one of those things where I just remember thinking about

1:53

it and being like, Yo, that's not that's

1:56

not right, right, Like we're not all

1:58

just faking what we look like because

2:01

one person did it or one person actually

2:04

looks like that, so we all have to try and fake

2:07

our way there. And that's just one aspect

2:09

of it, you know. I I see people who

2:11

I know flexing this this

2:14

a brand new car or a brand new watch, or

2:16

you see people who I know

2:19

aren't necessarily in the happiest relationship

2:21

posting about how amazing their their relationship

2:23

is. And I think it's not about telling

2:26

everybody exactly what's going on. But I think that

2:28

we've reached a certain level, especially in the

2:31

last few years, of just over

2:34

over hyping what's going on and not

2:36

talking about the reality of things. I actually

2:39

one of the through lines of this last year, especially

2:42

with with everything going on in society,

2:44

one of my through lines that I saw was that it

2:46

did get real for a second, got very

2:48

real for a second. I think it kind

2:51

of shed a light on the idea that

2:53

we can be real, that we can stand up for what

2:55

we believe in, and we can be who we really are, and

2:57

we can talk about all of that. I

2:59

have some amazing guests on today and we're gonna get

3:01

into them for a bit. But first I just I

3:03

couldn't stop but think, is

3:05

anything on Instagram real? What

3:10

is up? This is? Let's get into it. I'm alex I O

3:12

no, this is my podcast. This is the last. This

3:14

is I promised the actual last, Like, we're not doing

3:16

another encore after this. This is

3:18

the end. The final and we're talking

3:21

about Instagram and its effects on reality,

3:24

how Instagram changes reality.

3:26

And I have to absolutely fantastic

3:29

guests on here today. One

3:31

of them is I I. We have the craziest

3:33

story that we're gonna get into of how we know each other

3:35

or the way that we actually ended up connecting

3:37

with each other. He is an absolutely

3:40

phenomenal artist. The the idea

3:43

of a journeyman, a man

3:45

that I know, is proof that good

3:47

people in the industry when that you can

3:49

be happy, You can have the American

3:52

dream of a life with a beautiful wife and a

3:54

beautiful child. Just became a

3:56

dad this last year, so many amazing

3:59

things, releases, brand new single Blueberry Eyes, dropped

4:01

a remix of it. Everything

4:03

you might know him. My favorite song of his is still

4:05

Lights Down Low. I know it's I know it's corny

4:07

to say, but he is one of my favorite artists.

4:10

And he also sent me

4:12

a Rubik's Cube if you know I love Rubik's Cubes.

4:14

And he's got He's just got the best march in the game.

4:16

He is my friend, and I'm so happy

4:19

to say that he's my friend. The one and only Max.

4:21

What's up man? That's so happy to be on

4:23

the podcast. Thanks for dude. I'm so happy

4:26

that you're here and and you of all people

4:28

you know, like I mentioned, not only just

4:30

in the social media around, but you understand the journey,

4:33

you know, you understand what it takes to be an

4:35

artist, all of the good, all

4:37

of the bad, all of the ugly. So

4:39

I'm excited that we get to jump into it. Also

4:42

with us, I have a writer, a perfectionism

4:45

expert. I had never heard of this term, and it's

4:47

so cool. A perfectionism expert. The

4:49

founder of Monday Vibes, which is a personal growth

4:51

newsletter and a network for women UM.

4:54

She studied burnout and perfectionism at Columbia

4:56

University. If you don't know what that is,

4:59

major school UM, and if you don't know what that

5:01

is, you probably won't get there

5:04

UM and is currently working on her first

5:06

book right now, The One and Only Elizabeth

5:08

Sue. How are you? I'm so good.

5:11

Thank you for having me. Oh, thank you

5:13

for being here. I mean, I think it's what I love

5:15

about this setup. And again, Catherine, love

5:18

you to death, because you really set this up perfectly. As we

5:20

have somebody who's an expert on this exact

5:22

topic that we're talking about, and you have two

5:24

people, including myself, who are living

5:27

it like still to this day, are living

5:29

it. So we're gonna be getting into some sick topics,

5:31

first one being that Instagram isn't real,

5:34

uh. The sec what topic is going to be that we're just

5:36

consumed by our screens. And last,

5:38

but not least, we're gonna be all talking together about

5:40

taking the control back into

5:42

our own hands. But before we get into

5:44

that, I have a question that I ask every single one of my guests.

5:46

This is the last time that I get to ask this question for the season,

5:49

and I think next season we'll have a new question because

5:51

we've gotten a ton of different answers. That

5:54

question is what have you been doing this week to

5:56

improve yourself, your life?

5:58

You know anything? There's I one time I talked

6:01

about how I built a garden. Another time how I talked

6:03

about how I let myself eat a doughnut every day

6:05

for a week. So we've done there. No answer

6:07

is off as off limits. I would say

6:09

for me, the biggest thing that I've been doing

6:11

is it's something that I used to do all the time and then

6:13

I stopped doing it for a while. It's making

6:16

my bed in the morning. And I

6:18

remember watching this like old I don't know if it was

6:20

a Ted talk or it was like a speech about

6:22

and this like this military vet.

6:25

It was talking about when you meet you know, when you make your bed in the morning,

6:27

you have a calm, You start your day by accomplishing

6:29

something, and it sets you on the right path. It

6:31

also reminds me that I'm not allowed to get back in bed

6:34

until it's bedtime, because if I'm especially staying

6:36

in a hotel right now, I look at that bed and

6:38

I'm like, damn, that ship looks just

6:40

phenomenal right now. So I've

6:42

been making my bed. That's something that I've been

6:45

doing and uh and and it's always good to get

6:47

back on track to stuff, especially for me. I'm

6:49

very much so a systems person and

6:51

uh and so having my bed made

6:53

and clean reminds me that that's also

6:56

how I am. I am well made, I'm clean,

6:58

and I'm ready for whatever. That's what I've

7:00

been doing. Max, you got something for me. You'd

7:02

get along with my wife really well. She

7:05

she I lost a bed to her and I had

7:07

to make the bed all week the way that she likes to

7:09

do it, which is very military style, touch

7:11

the front into the into the full house

7:13

like full housekeeper. Oh yeah, she's

7:16

like two pillows on the top. That wasn't right, she would

7:18

she would got She got upset with me because I put the two

7:20

pillows behind the blanket instead of over the

7:22

blanket. So but I felt I did feel accomplished.

7:24

That's a good one. I tried to do a no phone day

7:27

with the family on the weekends,

7:29

like a Saturday, and I did it

7:31

on Saturday, and we took a trip. We brought our

7:34

baby at the beach for the first time, and she like felt

7:36

the way, Oh my god, cute. And

7:38

I think I realized how And it's funny with this episode,

7:40

I realized how attached I am.

7:42

I always do when I do this, because I just I

7:45

actually give the phone to Emily and she hides

7:47

it somewhere in the house so I have no idea where it is,

7:49

and then we leave and it

7:51

was the drive back because we're listening to music stuff. It

7:53

was the drive back where her friend was in the front

7:56

and she was on her phone and I and

7:58

I felt it. I was like, oh, I wish I had my phone

8:00

right now. I would be able to put when you don't have it,

8:03

you both realize you know how you use it. But also

8:06

I definitely feel more present. I was looking

8:08

out at the you know, driving on the pc H

8:10

and I'm looking at the waves when I probably would have been on my phone,

8:12

and it definitely puts things perspective. Absolutely.

8:16

There you go that we're we're we're already here.

8:18

We're talking about the topic. Elizabeth,

8:20

what have you been doing this week to improve yourself?

8:23

I love that example. I both

8:25

of your examples. I've been reflecting a lot

8:28

on getting better at

8:30

relaxing and both

8:32

the physical sense of not needing to be busy

8:35

and productive all the time, but also in the spiritual

8:37

sense of just letting go of control and trusting

8:39

that things will work

8:41

out the way that they're supposed to. And both

8:44

of those aspects are very difficult

8:46

for me. Yeah, I

8:48

can get behind it. Well, I'm glad that we're talking about it then

8:51

today, because we're literally gonna figure

8:53

out how to fix it, or at least take the right steps in

8:55

the right direction. So Max, you and I were

8:57

going to go one on one first. Elizabeth, you can

8:59

take a break and we'll be with you

9:01

in Justice sec. So again, Max,

9:04

because we're about to get into and I want you

9:06

to be able to be free to

9:09

talk about how bad of a phone

9:11

addict you are, because I'm going to talk about it myself.

9:13

I want to start by talking about how really

9:15

truly, like incredible of a person

9:18

Max is. Max met my

9:20

dad I was I couldn't

9:22

have been more than twelve or thirteen years old.

9:25

And my dad, if you don't, you've heard him on the podcast.

9:27

If you haven't, go check out that episode. My dad

9:30

is talkative and we'll always talk to anybody,

9:32

especially if he sees especially

9:34

if he sees a musical instrument of any

9:37

kind. But my dad

9:39

sat next to Max on an airplane

9:41

and Max had had a kalle in like

9:44

he was traveling with one, and um,

9:46

I don't remember the converse. You probably remember the conversation

9:48

better. But that's what exactly what makes me just

9:51

it reminds me all the time of how just a

9:53

good of a person Max is. Uh. He

9:55

had this conversation was when I was I was probably

9:57

like twelve, and I remember my dad was like, I

9:59

met this guy and he's on a he's on a TV

10:01

show and he's awesome and you should be

10:03

like him and Dada da da, And I was just like, all right, cool.

10:06

I met Max then for the first time. I

10:10

don't remember. I just remember your meeting your dad. I don't

10:12

remember where we met for the first time. Though I was twenty,

10:15

I was like twenty years old. This was eight years later

10:17

and I met I met Max, and I was like,

10:19

I think my dad sat with you on an airplane

10:22

and no, Lie he goes was his name? Martin,

10:24

like full blown remembers my dad.

10:27

And it was a conversation on an airplane.

10:29

I've had so many conversations on an airplane.

10:31

And I couldn't tell you. I couldn't even tell you. I couldn't

10:33

point him out in the crowd if it was if that happened,

10:36

Like no, you could not convince me that

10:38

I had met somebody on an airplane, and I just

10:41

it was. It's still to this day so

10:43

special to me that that that is um.

10:46

Also, if you talk to anybody in the

10:48

industry who has been able to work with Max

10:50

or Meat Max or No Max or even

10:53

c Max in concert, you will never

10:55

hear a bad thing about him. You're just like, I'm

10:57

just so happy that we got you here because

10:59

you're the epitome of good

11:02

people do win in the end like good

11:04

people. If you're a good person, you know,

11:06

the character matters, you know what I mean. So I again,

11:09

I'm going to absolutely just

11:11

light you up like the star that you are on

11:14

this podcast. Just man, thank you. I appreciate

11:16

you, baby, thank you for that being said, not

11:18

being said. Pick your poison, what's your

11:21

What's what's the social app that you're just addicted

11:24

to? I mean, it's all of them, for sure,

11:26

but but I'd say the one that's most toxic

11:29

to me is Twitter. I'd say

11:31

Instagram. I get

11:33

the most addicted to. I get lost in it

11:35

the most. I'll scroll through the most. And

11:37

then I tried, man, I tried to.

11:39

When I'm I haven't taken the deep

11:42

dive to TikTok, I feel like I am

11:44

in the TikTok game. But when I take

11:46

the deep dive, it's almost as bad as Instagram. But

11:48

for some reason, I don't let myself go there. But

11:50

with Instagram, it's so comfortable that

11:53

you know, It's like I go to get a midnight snack and

11:55

I happen to have my phone, and that's the one

11:57

I'm turning to to just screw

12:00

and then you can last that

12:02

one. Twitter, to me is hard to I think

12:04

Twitter is actually the hardest on

12:06

my mental health because it's

12:09

so um.

12:11

The people who are good at it are fantastic

12:13

at it and get insane likes and and

12:16

it's like one of those things where I feel, like with Instagram,

12:19

I know, at the end of the day, if I if I decided

12:21

to do like some thirst trappy like

12:23

shirtless this, then like it's gonna be like you

12:25

kind of know how to get likes

12:28

right like on Instagram and on

12:30

Twitter it's different, like you don't know. Like you

12:32

could tweet. I could tweet like peanut

12:34

butter sandwich and it could get forty thousand

12:36

likes. And I could tweet the funniest joke of all

12:38

time and it gets ten likes.

12:41

And it's just like I think the as

12:43

a person, like I mentioned somebody of systems,

12:46

like, there's no system to Twitter. It's just as

12:48

so random. And that's why I love using it as a fan

12:51

of it, because you find the just the stupidest,

12:53

craziest, most absurd humor.

12:56

But also you're like, how

12:58

do you feel, how do you crack the code? You

13:00

know, it's raw stand Twitter

13:02

is the is the most and

13:05

you are and you're so heavily in the k

13:07

pop and uh and like the pop

13:09

world and those fans those like

13:12

stands are

13:15

full blown like military force

13:18

of just power. I love

13:20

Twitter because of the freedom of information.

13:22

I would say it's but the downside

13:24

to that is that there isn't a lot of checks and balances

13:27

that I mean besides the obvious where

13:29

they like kick Trump off Twitter and all that, but as

13:32

just a society of it, things can spread

13:34

so quickly, which is kind of beautiful because

13:36

a lot of these social media is the you

13:38

know, they really they go into

13:40

the algorithm and then you actually don't like to see what you

13:43

actually signed up for. You know. It's like someone

13:45

like my wife asked me yesterday, do my photos

13:47

even come up on your feet anymore? And

13:50

it's so bizarre because she's my wife, But I mean I see

13:52

her all the time, so I'm not constantly searching here, so

13:54

it doesn't put her stuff on my feet. But with Twitter,

13:57

at least, I know it really it's

13:59

like what SoundCloud was for music in the beginning,

14:01

where people you really could just spread

14:03

each other's stuff in a really beautiful way, and it wasn't

14:05

really algorithmic based, but

14:08

I feel like it also again,

14:10

things can be fake and it gets spread

14:12

so quickly, and it's just that's it really

14:15

does have a double edged sort effect. It all does. Though.

14:17

Yeah, I think you already you've

14:19

already talked about it, um with the One

14:22

of my questions was like, do you have any things that set

14:24

like that help you set limits on using your

14:26

phone or being You already answered that with your with

14:28

your previous answer, But what got

14:30

you there? What made you? What was the moment that you

14:32

go, you know, was it having your daughter, was

14:35

it you know, being with did you have

14:37

a moment where you're like, wow, I'm really just

14:39

locked into this or this isn't well, this isn't

14:41

good for me. It just affected me too

14:43

much. And then I was realizing that these are tools.

14:46

They're not our life, and I think there's a fine balance

14:48

and and it's our we for

14:51

what we do. It's really important

14:53

to utilize these

14:55

tools to put our work

14:57

out there, and oftentimes

14:59

it it's you know, it makes the work even

15:01

bigger if it's used in the right way. So

15:04

it's hard not to be obsessed with it when you know it

15:06

has the power to spread what you've

15:08

been working months or years on and

15:11

you can't just discount. And Emily always

15:13

says this to me too, It's like it is a part of our job in a

15:16

way now, And I think

15:18

that for me, I realized

15:20

though that I was spending too much time like looking at

15:22

what everybody said, too much time in the comments,

15:24

too much time really diving

15:27

in and then you know, it's the classic.

15:29

I would see something bad and I'd keep

15:31

looking for more bad just because

15:33

you see the good and you you scroll

15:36

through that, you don't put as much weight

15:38

into it. Once you get the bad. Oh, it just deeper

15:41

and deeper in your gun. And I think especially and

15:43

You're the same way. There's a there's an empathetic

15:46

feeling to it where you don't just see these as fake

15:48

accounts. You see these as people on the other

15:50

side of the screen saying

15:52

this. And so when you think of it that way, and you

15:54

think they'd have the you know, the audacity to say.

15:56

But the thing that really made me realize that

15:58

recently, through a few different journeys

16:01

was I realized that we put

16:03

ourselves in this position. What we do

16:05

is we say we have you know, a movie

16:08

or an album or songs, and we put them

16:10

out there and you just really it's the acceptance

16:12

of people are gonna hate it or they're gonna

16:14

love it. It really has to you have to be okay

16:16

with the polarization because if

16:18

you just do what you think people are gonna

16:20

like, you're you're just gonna stay in

16:23

the middle. And it's it's hard

16:25

because you do take it personally

16:27

because it's so deeply personal and it always

16:29

will be and you're totally And the thing that's

16:31

crazy too, is is it it's all about self

16:34

confidence right like when you

16:36

start listening. I remember when I was I think

16:38

I was like eighteen, and I had and I had

16:40

just booked, I just uh released

16:43

the first season of Royal Crush or the second season,

16:46

and I wasn't fit, Like I wasn't as fit

16:48

as I am now. I wasn't like as like about fitness,

16:50

and I was like a little you know, like a little

16:53

frumpy dad body like asked. And

16:55

I remember the episode where I was shirtless.

16:57

All of the comments and and it's like you said, like

17:00

good comments are are? I wish that I cared

17:02

about good comments as much as I care about

17:04

bad comments, like I'll scroll through and I'm

17:06

like, I don't care if you liked it. I don't care if you like not not

17:08

if you're listening to this, I don't actually feel like that. But when

17:10

you're not in the right headspace, you're just searching,

17:12

like, yeah, but who's where's the where's the criticism?

17:15

And I remember screenshotting a comment that

17:17

was like Alex would be the biggest star in the

17:20

world if he wasn't so fat. And

17:22

I remember that comment to this day, and I screenshot

17:24

at it and I made it my wallpaper. I cared

17:27

so much because, like you said,

17:29

there's a person when it's when you think about it,

17:31

like, that's a person and my job

17:33

is to make people happy, and that person is

17:35

not happy that I'm this, and you kind of you

17:38

really turn yourself. And I

17:40

think another thing that it really does is it it turns

17:43

an album, right like for instance, your album

17:45

Absolutely Beautiful. I still listen to

17:47

Acid like literally, it's my it's

17:49

my first, my warm up song for everything

17:55

that when you're creating a piece of art and

17:57

you have that in your mind, no matter what it is,

17:59

it's an album. It's this it's that you're already

18:02

pre preparing for what

18:05

comments are gonna come. Well, okay, well it has to be this because

18:07

I don't want people to say that I'm not this, and it

18:10

has to be that. It really changes

18:12

subconsciously, it changes your full

18:15

like self confidence. For

18:17

me, it's my weight, you know, it has always been

18:19

my weight, and I've done We've had episodes talking about

18:21

binge eating. It's always been my weight, and I'm so

18:23

happy that I finally found a place where I work out

18:25

for me, and I don't work out because I

18:28

don't want people to comment about it. For

18:30

me, it's it's it's all about my weight, and it was always

18:32

about my skin until I until I luckily ended

18:34

up clearing it up. Is there anything specific

18:36

for you that you're like, I that

18:39

it's really social media is really messed up.

18:41

It's not you know what's interesting. It's not a specific

18:44

physical trade or anything like that. I

18:46

think it's just, um, yeah,

18:48

it's just this striving for my best,

18:51

I guess, and I guess this is

18:53

truly recently, the acceptance of people

18:55

just not liking even your best,

18:57

your personal best, because it's just they're

18:59

just not to it, you know, and that's hard

19:01

when you know that you're striving for

19:03

that, when you're trying to put what you feel

19:06

is the best you can offer out, and then

19:08

the realization that it's just some people just don't

19:11

like that thing, like some people just

19:13

hate raps, some people just hate countries something,

19:15

and even if it's the best damn country music

19:17

you will ever hear, Like Dolly Parton

19:20

is my is my idol. And if

19:22

someone says, I remember I told a really good friend

19:24

of mine, I was like, oh yeah, man, Dolly wrote me this

19:26

letter. It was the craziest thing in my life. I have

19:28

to make a song with her whatever. And she was like, Dolly,

19:31

pardon what. And the thought

19:33

that I could worship this person and

19:35

another person could hate them

19:38

is mind blowing. But then when you're in

19:40

our position, it just I think it

19:42

makes it less harsh because then you just realize,

19:45

man, I mean, but imagine if

19:47

she tried to convince, if Dolly Parton tried to convince

19:49

that person who didn't like her, you

19:51

should like me. It's like that wouldn't be something

19:53

she do. She just brushes it off, baby, and

19:56

you just the more we can brush it off, whatever

19:58

it may be, but that septance and that

20:00

self confidence, like you're saying, finding that the

20:03

more that you have that armor for what we do, you

20:05

just keep building that big gas you know,

20:07

coat and suit of arms exactly the

20:10

better it feels when it does it just

20:12

it just starts to just ping off of

20:14

you. If you know that, you know you couldn't have given

20:16

it any better than than what you gave. That's

20:18

why I'm so glad that you're on this episode,

20:20

because I think you have such a good grasp

20:23

on what is real, Like you're kind of not

20:25

necessarily on the other side of it now, but you're

20:27

experiencing it in real time, and

20:29

you're also having you're experiencing

20:31

it with the knowledge of hey, this is this you're

20:34

very it's a very grounded sense. Um.

20:36

And I think because it's such a grounded sense, you are

20:38

so good at it. Like it's like it's

20:40

everything you post feels like authentic,

20:43

right, everything from the curated

20:45

whole page of yellow to you

20:47

know, to the photo shoots and everything

20:50

thematically is just m It's

20:53

just clean and precise. I

20:55

think a lot of people see that. And and again

20:57

as anybody with the following, they'll

21:00

see that and they'll think that

21:02

it's the that it takes the same amount of effort as

21:04

somebody who's just posting a picture, you know, they're

21:06

at the beach and they snap a quick flick. But because

21:08

a lot of people then try and compare how they

21:11

post to how we post

21:13

or how somebody who's who puts in hours

21:15

and hours to edit pictures and

21:17

and and set up photo shoots and

21:19

and drive, you know, at sunrise

21:21

to the certain locations so that they can get this amazing

21:23

shot. I think a lot of people compare how

21:26

they post and making sure that they look good

21:28

and doing all of this, I think it started spiraling downwards.

21:30

And so I think a big piece of of helping

21:33

change that narrative is getting real

21:35

about how we get things

21:38

done. You know, Like I remember

21:40

a Wonderland photo shoot last year that I

21:42

did and I look

21:44

like I looked awesome, my six pack and my hair

21:46

was perfect afro, and it was like amazing, and

21:49

people are like, wow, like, you look so effortless in

21:51

this I remember that sortain effortless. You look effortless in this

21:54

picture, And I was just like, are you do

21:56

you know what it took to get to that? Like

21:58

I was eating is eating kale

22:01

and dreams for breakfast,

22:03

and then I would have like egg white like and I was just working

22:05

out and I worked out for that one photo shoot,

22:08

and then after that photoshop was done, I had a huge in and

22:10

out burger and I did this whole nine and all of that. So

22:13

can you help elaborate on how much effort

22:15

really goes into something, because you are, I

22:17

really feel like, just one of the top pages

22:20

to follow when it comes to having that cohesive

22:23

thing. I mean, we're talking glam squad. We're talking hair

22:25

and makeup, and we're talking a backdrop, and we're

22:27

talking props and all of this stuff. What

22:30

what do you feel like people don't really fully understand

22:32

that goes on behind the scenes to create something

22:35

that people compare their everyday life

22:37

to. One of my newest favorite things is

22:39

it's a both. It's like for the album cover,

22:41

for example, I think people thought the Rubi's Cube was photoshopped,

22:44

but we built this giant, life

22:46

sized Ruby's Cube, And you know, I've took photos

22:48

on and stuff, and I think it's the combination of that

22:51

for what we do that's fun. It's like showing we

22:53

actually built that. So it is a little

22:55

it's hard to do, but also it's physically

22:57

you can you know, it's not like we're

23:00

aliens. We're humans and somebody became

23:03

a workshop person and they built that because

23:05

that's what they do. And I think, if anything,

23:07

it's just you know, be obsessive

23:10

with with what you do, what you love in your vision.

23:12

And then on the other side, I've realized I really

23:14

like the whole disposable thing now, like a

23:17

lot of if it's not that it's the opposite, it's

23:19

like something I can't edit it all, or just disposable

23:21

shots from studio whatever, so that it

23:23

I have no way. For one, it's just

23:25

there. It's not like I could, you know, I

23:28

could edit the photo or anything else. And hopefully

23:30

that rawness is something that comes across.

23:32

But also I feel like why I've loved it recently

23:34

is too because the rawness of those photos

23:37

always just feels like a moment in time,

23:39

and I feel like we lose that with Instagram and

23:41

all these things, like we're always we're using

23:43

it, like you're saying, there's people of the beach

23:45

or whatever else, and and we're like

23:47

we're doing something for Instagram

23:49

rather than doing something and sharing it with the

23:51

world. That's

23:54

that I feel like, that's and I'm I'm

23:56

I'm I'm with it. Man, I've did

23:58

that. I've just recently and this is hugely

24:01

because of Emily, because I have a baby, and you

24:03

just realize that time is such a different

24:05

construct when this little human is going to change

24:07

so quickly. Um, it's

24:09

not that you can't use these things. I know this is kind of

24:11

a tangent of what you were asking, but I just

24:13

I think it's one of those things where, yes,

24:16

it's like a gymnast goes in and you see them

24:18

do you know, triple spins and it

24:20

looks effortless like you were saying. But um,

24:22

but in the end, it takes so much time and work to do that.

24:24

But also that's their thing. And

24:26

I feel like, you know, when

24:28

you're creating these visual worlds for

24:31

music or you know, for videos, like what we're

24:33

doing, and it is very clean to Christine, that's

24:36

what we do though, that's the time we're doing and

24:38

you don't have to don't replicate that, do you. I

24:40

love there's this TikTok account and she's just

24:42

a beekeeper and she just shows

24:45

that she's the best. It's

24:47

the and you know what, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed

24:49

because it is raw. And

24:52

you know she I'm sure she takes

24:54

photos of the beach too, but sure clearly her

24:56

thing is she's obsessed with these bees. She goes places,

24:59

she makes these videos. So finding

25:01

your thing that is, so you're

25:03

obsessed with that's uniquely you. That doesn't

25:06

feel like work because you're working

25:08

so hard at it, but you're not drained by it. That's

25:11

that's what we should be using these tools to spread

25:13

and share because we all have that

25:15

thing, whatever it is to us. I feel like at

25:18

the end of the day, it just comes down to being authentic. You

25:20

know. It's authenticity, it's being yourself and

25:22

you again are I think it's like

25:25

you're such you're like I

25:27

think because I'm lucky enough to know you, I

25:30

see and I'm like, dude, that's him.

25:32

Like people, if if you want to, you don't have to

25:34

ask, well, what's Max? Like like literally look at

25:36

his posts like that's who Max is, you know. And

25:39

that's something that I think we should all strive

25:41

to do, Like, we should all be authentic.

25:43

And I think up on social media, everybody was just their authentic

25:45

selves. We can still post you know,

25:47

your your beach pick where you worked really hard

25:49

and you have an a six pack and you're feeling great

25:52

and you're confident, but authenticity

25:54

is like so huge. I have a lot of other

25:56

friends and not to call them out or and I'm not gonna

25:59

say any names, but I have friends who

26:01

I'm like, why are you posting that? Like you're

26:03

not that's not you, Like, that's not you're

26:06

talking about you know, life

26:08

is great, life is this, And then you're calling me crying

26:10

like or or the opposite, like somebody

26:13

just bought a new Lamborghini and is like life is good,

26:15

and I'm like, life's not. The life's not good, Like we're

26:17

in the middle of a pandemic that probably

26:19

wasn't a financially smart idea to do.

26:22

Like sometimes I get upset or I have

26:24

to, like I find myself having to like mute people, like if

26:26

you had to have you had to mute anybody like because

26:29

you're just like either there you don't feel

26:31

like they're being their most authentic self, or what they're posting

26:34

isn't relatable because it's not it's

26:37

not off, it's not a real thing that people

26:39

go through. I've had to do that, and honestly,

26:41

I'm gonna I'm I'm gonna admit it. I've had to do it to

26:43

friends, like I've had to do it to like really good friends of

26:45

mine, you know, because it that

26:48

authenticity is huge, you know what I mean? Yeah,

26:50

No, totally, Man, I feel like it's it's always

26:53

tough when you know the person so well and you

26:55

feel like, if anything, sometimes it just feels

26:57

like it's they're they're just reaching out for help. And

26:59

I even see with haters, you know, I've I've really tried

27:01

to recently realize that hating

27:04

anybody who criticizes all

27:06

the time or hates all the time, they're just looking

27:08

for someone else to connect with who also feels

27:10

that way. It's just another tool

27:12

to utilize to say, I just

27:14

you know, did you hate the weekend super

27:17

Bowl performance? Like this is why I hate it's like

27:19

and which is, by the way, the most polarizing

27:22

performance you could do those my gosh, because

27:24

I thought he was fantastic and I thought he did a great

27:26

job. And I know what you invest

27:29

in people like how do what it takes

27:31

and what it takes you see those thousand people on the field

27:33

who you think is paying for that? Who did there? So's

27:35

the COVID test all this stuff. It's like people wonder,

27:37

but point being, I

27:39

think, you know, but he also put himself

27:42

on that stage, and therefore that

27:44

stage can be criticized. And as

27:47

long as he keeps doing his thing no matter what

27:49

people are saying, amen to him.

27:51

And I feel like exactly, but

27:53

those kinds of people I try to

27:55

cut out more and more in my life. Like you're saying, maybe

27:57

muter when I just see that it's constant

28:00

criticism and hate. It's not even to make

28:02

better, it's it's almost like that's their identity

28:05

is too criticize or

28:07

hate. And to the point where I just feel

28:09

like, where what do you love? Then like,

28:11

okay, find goodly, I

28:13

see what you hate, but whereas you

28:15

know, it's like there's this dude, um

28:18

Anthony Fantano. He's a music critic, and

28:20

personally I'm into because I just feel like he

28:22

really does give love word where

28:25

he feels it's due, and maybe he

28:27

gives criticism where he feels it's due. But I do appreciate

28:30

that it is both. It isn't just

28:32

a guy who just like this album sucks. This album

28:34

sucks, he goes, this album is a masterpiece.

28:36

And here's why I feel it so at least

28:38

with those like if those are the kinds of people

28:40

I don't want in my life as much, who

28:42

just feel like they're draining you more than they're

28:44

giving you energy, right, and that that's

28:47

not worth it. It's not about being positive

28:49

all the time, because that, I think is also a huge,

28:52

a huge problem. It's about being

28:54

authentic. I think, just authentic, you know, and

28:56

and again I can't you're not

28:58

iterated enough. It's just awesome seeing your face.

29:01

Man. And by the way, forgot to say,

29:03

great bowler, a great bowlder. Um,

29:06

when life is when life is back to normal

29:09

and bowling isn't the weirdest germyst

29:11

thing in the world, We'll we'll have to

29:13

have I have to come to a bowling night. Um. But you

29:15

really are You're you are the

29:18

same, Max, whether we're in like,

29:20

whether I've seen you at a at a a large

29:23

group of people, whether I'm sitting in your dressing

29:25

room, whether we're in the d m s, whether you're

29:27

posting on social media, whatever, it is like, you

29:29

are always the same, and your

29:31

fans I feel like, get to

29:34

see that and sleep

29:36

peacefully knowing that you're not like one of

29:38

those. By the way, these people are real secret

29:41

like awesome, positive celebrities who like

29:43

behind closed doors is being a psychopath like

29:45

and treating everybody like garbage. Right, So

29:48

the people that follow you online who

29:50

love your posts, who are super happy,

29:53

um, but might

29:55

be missing what your biggest

29:57

message that you want is. I would love

29:59

to hear what is what is the biggest message

30:02

that Max on

30:04

social media and in life would

30:06

love for his followers to

30:09

to feel and understand. Honestly,

30:11

I just want them to find what I was saying their obsession,

30:13

because I think we all have that thing that we

30:16

feel guilty that we enjoy doing so

30:18

much whatever it is. Like my wife, for

30:20

example, she is so great at

30:22

shopping and that sounds funny, but as a style

30:24

she does the video Emily

30:26

style is immaculate, so

30:29

good she does. She's dressing our baby like a little

30:31

queen. And I think for a long time, and

30:33

I mean, she can't spend all the money that we have left. You

30:35

know, baby's got to go to college. But I

30:37

do there was a second where you know, I was

30:39

telling her like I hate shopping, which sounds

30:41

crazy too, but don't put me in a store

30:43

for hours, don't do any of these things. And she

30:46

really she loves it. She'll spend

30:48

hours looking for the best outfits and it

30:50

doesn't drain her. It's she's into

30:52

that and I see the joy.

30:54

But I sometimes see the guilt in her face, thinking that,

30:57

like, you know, that's not that's not a job, or she's

30:59

not doing a great job doing it, but that

31:01

is it. And I only hope that because people

31:04

are their happiest when they do find that obsession

31:06

that they're into and they realize that

31:08

they shouldn't feel guilty for it because someone

31:11

like me hate shopping, which sounds crazy, But

31:13

if you love it, you're meant to do it. If you love being

31:16

a trainer, if you love being a

31:18

doctor. I want the doctor who's obsessed with

31:20

being a doctor to my doctor, the person

31:22

who live our baby. That woman walked in

31:24

her name she whatever else said, and her name

31:26

is Dr Bliss, best name, Oh my god.

31:28

And this woman, this woman shows up every day and

31:31

she loves bringing babies into the world.

31:33

That's who you want. So all I can hope is

31:35

that those people out there, hopefully

31:37

see how obsessed I am with what I get to do, to the point

31:39

where I have to put my phone away because I'm

31:42

just looking up more music. And I hope they find

31:44

that because everybody deserves to have that in their life.

31:46

Well, my guy, I'm

31:48

gonna use the line that you you gave me

31:50

and uh and when I got my nice little merge pack,

31:52

you have the voice of an angel and the heart of one

31:54

to my friend. We're gonna take a quick

31:56

break when we come back. Elizabeth and I are going a

31:59

deep, deep dive into what's going on behind

32:01

the screens. Don't go anywhere, all right,

32:03

We are back and I am here with this

32:05

is I still can't I still love this title.

32:08

A perfectionism expert, and

32:10

we're going to figure out what that means. Elizabeth. Sue

32:13

is here with us. Elizabeth, how are you today?

32:16

I'm so good. I can't

32:18

wait. This is a topic near and dear to my heart,

32:20

so I can't get into it.

32:23

I know you're an expert in all of this, but we

32:25

do have to start the same way I started with Max.

32:27

What's your poison? What is it that gets

32:30

you hooked? Oh? Go

32:32

on, you know, I think

32:34

it's a toss up between the

32:36

constant checking, like it's

32:40

I'm like making dinner, I'm like in line,

32:42

I'm waiting for

32:45

a friend and I just can't stop

32:48

checking. Um, and that that

32:50

feeling of like what

32:52

did I miss? I hate that feeling

32:54

because it's I literally

32:57

didn't miss my husband's like what do you think

32:59

changed between the three seconds that

33:01

you just checked? And it makes me feel

33:03

crazy. And

33:05

then my other big, big

33:09

thing that just destroys

33:11

my mental health is comparing myself to others.

33:14

It is it's running

33:16

a business and as a writer trying to get

33:18

published, it's just constant.

33:22

She's doing it better. They have a bigger

33:24

following, they have better connections,

33:26

Like I am a worthless piece of crap like it it

33:28

gets dark so quickly. So

33:31

I'm gonna just take an awesome segue

33:33

because you describe yourself as a self

33:35

love evangelist. You

33:38

just said that.

33:40

That being said, does

33:42

social media teach us anything positive

33:44

about self love? Or is it all negative?

33:47

That's a great question. Um.

33:50

I think in your conversation

33:52

with Max, like, I really loved it. That actually

33:55

brought me me a lot of joy because it

33:57

did bring me back to the good things about

34:00

it. And I am also, you

34:02

know, on this journey of building a community and building

34:05

an audience, and for so long

34:07

it did feel very frustrating

34:10

and it felt very toxic,

34:12

like it was it was hard

34:14

for me to separate that business

34:18

strategy from

34:20

my self love journey of trying not to

34:23

tie my worth to people's

34:25

approvals of me and likes and comments

34:27

and followers is exactly

34:30

people's approval of you. So it's really

34:33

it's been very confronting.

34:36

But I think you're right in

34:39

what social media does do is

34:41

it brings people together from

34:43

around the world in a very cool way. And

34:46

I've seen that happen, and I think for

34:49

me, because I can't ditch it,

34:51

I don't think any of us can, especially where

34:54

we are right now in the pandemic, And

34:56

so it's trying to figure out how to make it work

34:59

for you and take

35:02

take the good. And I think for me, it's

35:05

showing up as as

35:07

you were, saying as authentically as

35:09

I can, and putting myself out there and

35:11

hoping that hoping that that is

35:13

enough and if it isn't, at least I

35:16

can go to bed feeling like I

35:19

was an integrity and I was

35:22

continuing to put one foot forward

35:24

on trying to feel good about

35:26

myself. Absolutely. I mean that's but that's why

35:28

I love your Your title is amazing

35:30

self love evangelists. Like an evangelist

35:33

like you're. You're not claiming that you

35:35

are, that you have all the answers. You're not like a professor

35:37

of self love like you are an

35:39

evangel like you're you're also going through it.

35:41

You're just trying to help others get there too, you

35:43

know. And so I think it is important for us

35:46

to to find the things that social media

35:48

can teach us about self love. That's why I love like

35:50

you'll have those I love seeing

35:53

my favorite things to see on on Instagram or

35:55

weight loss journeys, like people who are

35:57

like I lost a hundred pounds this year, and you go in

35:59

those comments and it's so like, yes,

36:01

you got this, and you see it. And I think a lot of people,

36:03

especially me, like I see those and it

36:05

does inspire me to go, you know what, I want to do

36:08

that because because I see how happy

36:10

they look, and I see all of these things and it gives

36:12

you. And I think a lot of times

36:14

for me especially, I feel like fitness is a way

36:16

of me giving myself self love because I'm giving

36:18

my body what it needs and I'm taking care of myself

36:21

and you see things like that, and there are definitely

36:24

moments, you know, it's those glimmers of light

36:26

that are just so helpful, you

36:28

know, or I wish there was, like I don't know if

36:30

there's like a social media app that only is that stuff,

36:32

but I feel like we spend

36:35

it's and it actually studies show that we spend

36:37

like three times more energy

36:40

and more free time on apps that are draining,

36:42

like social media can be. Then the

36:45

ones that actually enrich our lives, like a meditation

36:47

app or a or an app that that what's

36:49

that app that I use that? Like you you start

36:52

a clock and it grows a tree, and if you use your

36:54

app, then the tree, if you use your phone then the tree dies.

36:57

Things like that like we use we spend three

36:59

times more of our free time there, right,

37:01

And Max and I were just talking about how we

37:04

search for the bad comments. We're trying to like

37:06

we're almost like going for it. Why do you

37:08

feel like we can't stop using social media even

37:10

when it makes us feel bad. Sometimes even because it makes

37:12

us feel bad. Absolutely,

37:15

it's it's very

37:17

intentional the forest app. Thank

37:19

you, Catherine, the forest app. That's what it's called.

37:21

I got myself a little forest, right,

37:23

and I love I love that. No, I

37:25

think I think that's where that's

37:28

kind of where we have to begin, and we have to

37:30

give ourselves and each other grace

37:33

and compassion for the fact that

37:35

that is literally what

37:37

social media is designed to do, is

37:39

to pick at your insecurities and

37:43

scarcity and all these things

37:45

that get us hooked and get

37:47

us addicted and want because

37:50

it psychologically that's what it was

37:52

built around. And the likes and the comments

37:54

and that follows all of that hits our pleasure

37:56

centers in our brain, so of course

37:59

we would want more of that. And so I think

38:02

that's a really important thing to keep in mind

38:04

when you're feeling it's I always

38:06

think about this, it's like there's nothing worse and

38:08

feeling bad about feeling bad. So when you're

38:10

like starting to like

38:13

hate on yourself for not being able

38:15

to get your social media addiction

38:18

under control or disconnect, like we

38:21

it's kind of at this point we all know what

38:23

we should do. We all know, you

38:25

know, we live happier or more peaceful lives if we

38:27

meditated, and we drink a lot of water,

38:29

and we exercised, and we

38:32

didn't spend a lot of time on our phones, but spend

38:34

time in nature. Like we all know that, and yet

38:36

we are in this digital

38:39

age where for so

38:41

many of us it is a part of our business. It's

38:43

how we make money. And until you

38:46

know, capitalism dies, it's kind

38:48

of going to have to be something that

38:50

we think about. And so I

38:53

I think it is important to just keep that in

38:55

mind when you start to feel insecure about that,

38:57

to have compassion for just

39:00

what is actually at play. How

39:03

do you think we discern between

39:06

I'm being enriched right now because I think

39:08

criticism, you know, like Max said, he has his favorite

39:10

like critics who and I and

39:12

I we just dropped finding a Han and there's critics

39:14

and I love reading the critics like who actually have

39:17

things that I think are constructive.

39:20

But how do we tell how how can the listener at

39:22

home, who's like, well, sometimes I look at Instagram and I

39:24

feel really good, but sometimes I feel bad. But sometimes

39:26

I feel bad but it's good, And sometimes I feel good

39:28

but it's bad. How do we discern whether

39:31

we're being enriched or drained by Instagram

39:33

or another platform that is

39:36

the life. That's what we're all

39:38

trying to It's like, I

39:40

mean, that's what I'm trying to practice

39:43

every day in relationship,

39:45

you know, all the business opportunities, everything is

39:47

is that discernment. And what I love about

39:49

what you just shared about all the different versions

39:52

of emotions around social

39:54

media is to be aware

39:57

that it can be different.

39:59

And actually, I think

40:02

comes back to your own

40:04

heart and your own body and where you are

40:06

at, because we tend to think so

40:09

much outside ourselves,

40:11

like what is this thing doing

40:14

to us? And how do we then

40:16

change our behavior? But I

40:19

think we can flip it and take stock

40:21

and how we are feeling in

40:24

any given moment and kind of take that

40:26

lead. And so I know, for me, if I'm feeling

40:29

very raw and vulnerable and

40:31

I go on social media, it's

40:33

almost like my egos going

40:35

to latch onto things that are going

40:38

to fuel that fire of

40:40

worthlessness, of feeling

40:42

unworthy. And so

40:45

I try to you know, I

40:47

don't get it right every time because I am

40:49

indeed and perfect, um,

40:52

I you know, try to check in

40:54

with myself how am I feeling today

40:57

and have that intention

40:59

going into whatever it is that I'm

41:01

doing usually for for business,

41:04

and and then kind of step

41:06

out, step out of that and to

41:09

see how that is making me feel. But

41:11

I think when you have that constant scroll,

41:13

in, that constant checking, you can go

41:16

so quickly from like oh,

41:18

like this is a tool, or this is I

41:20

just did this like really fun. I g live right,

41:23

um, listen to this cool podcast and sharing that

41:25

with your community too,

41:28

like oops, I just got triggered by this

41:30

like person over here doing this

41:33

thing that upset me over

41:35

here. So it can fluctuates so quickly. Absolutely,

41:38

I totally agree with you, Like it's it's

41:40

so easy to jump, like the

41:42

switch over. I could be watching one I could

41:44

be looking at one post and feel incredible, and

41:46

it's like it's kind of like um a slot machine,

41:49

you know, like you you might you swipe

41:51

one time and you're like, oh my gosh, like I love that

41:53

sad video to that sad song about like

41:55

the Sun who pays off his parents debt,

41:58

and you're just like love awesome. And then next

42:00

post you're seeing like a riot

42:02

and you're just like, oh, okay, all

42:05

right, like there's nothing

42:07

there, right, And and so outside

42:10

of that um and getting more

42:12

into the your your personal experience,

42:15

and I think a lot of people are dealing with this. And you're obviously

42:17

a perfectionalism expert, and you've also

42:19

talked about your drive for perfection

42:21

and how you had to overcome that, and I relate with that so

42:23

much. I remember, even to this day,

42:25

like I have a tiny gap in my two

42:28

front teeth because I didn't wear my retainers

42:30

enough. And now I'm like, it's the only thing I

42:32

think about. Or I'll get one pimple on my forehead

42:34

and I think I look like the dude

42:36

from Goonies, the hey you guys. I

42:40

think Instagram, specifically, all social

42:42

media's that include visual stimulation

42:46

trigger that need for a perfection

42:49

and and it's really a

42:51

problem for me, and it's a problem for

42:53

a lot of people. So, as an expert, as

42:55

we're closing out this segment, what's

42:57

your advice for the for the watcher out there

42:59

who, even if they're not I, strive

43:01

for a perfection outside of

43:03

social media. So it even doubles

43:06

down on social media. But even if you don't

43:08

strive perfection, you watch social media and you feel

43:10

bad about yourself because you're not this or you're not that,

43:12

And then you you try and do the fat diets

43:14

because you didn't look like that model, and then

43:17

you get like, you get drained,

43:19

So then you're feeling sad and you're looking and it's

43:21

just it can be such a downward spiral. What

43:24

is your advice? Because you obviously this

43:26

is this is your study. You know, people can feel

43:28

burnt out, they can feel completely

43:31

useless, they can feel purposeless,

43:33

they can feel lost, and and it can all

43:36

be triggered from one

43:38

post. It can all be triggered from one thing.

43:40

You know, what's your advice? Ah,

43:44

I know I have, I've been there,

43:46

and even someone who studies

43:48

this all the time, I well,

43:51

it's I study it because I struggle

43:53

with it. And I think

43:55

something to think about two is,

43:59

you know, if if you're on this self love journey

44:01

and trying to embrace your imperfections,

44:04

like you're not going to be able to do that

44:06

perfectly. You know, I'm I'm

44:09

in the self help world

44:11

a lot and the personal growth world,

44:13

and I think there is this

44:16

idea that you're either you

44:19

know, someone who's really struggling or

44:21

you know, putting all this like negative and you're

44:24

using social media um to kind

44:26

of drag down the world or

44:28

you're over here, like being

44:32

overly positive and overly

44:34

like here here are the

44:36

five steps to achieving like

44:39

a peaceful life for happiness

44:42

or whatever. And even though

44:45

those things are helpful

44:48

and useful, I think there's

44:50

a middle ground that is reality

44:53

and that is more authentic and

44:55

that does show okay here, like

44:58

this is a like cool

45:00

piece that I just wrote that I can't wait to share with y'all

45:03

um alongside you know, a

45:05

picture of me crying where it was like,

45:07

today was a terrible day. I've

45:11

I've had posts like that where it's like I actually have

45:13

no advice for you right now other than like

45:16

some days suck and that's okay.

45:19

And then there's another, you know, a picture

45:21

of me dancing that's like, you know, I

45:24

like I got some fun news and like I'm

45:26

going to celebrate, Like here's for celebration,

45:29

and so it's it's

45:32

I think that being

45:34

able, that that is part of the

45:36

vulnerability of social media

45:39

is I think as long as

45:41

we're able to be

45:45

okay with who we are,

45:47

and that that is what the studies show

45:51

is the number one way to combat perfectionism

45:54

is to cultivate unconditional self

45:56

acceptance because kind of to backup,

45:58

perfectionism really is

46:00

that feeling what psychologists

46:03

call you have a contingent

46:06

sense of self worth. So this

46:08

idea that I am only worthy

46:10

of love and acceptance and approval if

46:13

I achieve something, and it's killer

46:15

because we live in a society

46:18

that keeps beating us those

46:20

messages. And with what I found

46:23

astonishing in my research

46:25

was in the last thirty years, perfectionism

46:28

has increased thirty three percent,

46:31

and that is mostly due

46:33

to societal expectations.

46:35

So there are actually three components

46:37

of perfectionism. One is self oriented

46:40

perfectionism, which is kind of being

46:42

hard on ourselves. The other is

46:44

other oriented perfectionism, which

46:46

is people being hard

46:48

on other people. So if you if

46:51

I judge myself very harshly,

46:53

I'm going to judge other people harshly, even

46:55

if, like in my heart, I'm a good person,

46:57

Like that just is what happens. And

46:59

then the third is socially prescribed, so

47:01

it's you can look at it in terms of um,

47:04

academic institutions, workplaces,

47:06

Hollywood, you know, all these avenues

47:09

that tell us we need

47:11

to be perfect in order to succeed.

47:13

So we have kind of this coming at all

47:16

angles. And social media really is

47:18

that perfect storm where it's coming

47:20

together. You're putting content out, you're

47:22

seeing other people's content, and then you have this

47:25

like how your standard to try

47:27

to meet which is impossible, absolutely

47:29

absolutely, and you said it. Social media

47:31

literally is all of that and it's everywhere

47:33

and it's so easy, and I'm

47:36

so glad that you would. Thank you for giving

47:38

all of this information. We're gonna take a break

47:40

and when we come back, we're gonna figure out how we

47:42

fix it, what we can do to actually make

47:44

a change about all of this madness. Uh,

47:47

do not go anywhere, Elizabeth, to thank

47:49

you so much for coming on. Alright,

47:52

it is time we are here. Everybody's

47:54

where, we're all chilling, and we're talking about how we fix

47:56

all of this. Right, we're taught. We we've been talking

47:58

about the problems. We've talked, talked about what's going

48:00

on behind the scenes. How do we fix

48:02

this stuff? I feel like it's kind of easy,

48:05

but not easy, And it's just I

48:07

think it's just about how much time and energy

48:09

we give into it. Right, So,

48:12

um, obviously it's easier said than done.

48:14

We use our phones, especially if you are

48:16

working from home, or you are out and about,

48:19

You're using your phones more than anything,

48:21

and opening your social media apps is just as easy

48:23

as opening you know, your other apps.

48:25

So what do you guys think is something that we can do

48:28

to minimize? Um, If

48:30

we can't minimize the amount that we use our

48:32

phone based off of our job or based off of

48:34

you know, the fact that that's just who we are as humans

48:36

right now, what can we do to minimize

48:39

the impact that social media has

48:41

on our minds? How that the impact that has on our emotions

48:43

and the impact that has on our self worth go for

48:45

a queen? I have

48:47

so many thoughts. Um, one is

48:50

is what Max was saying before, and

48:52

it seems so simple, But taking breaks,

48:54

that's like textbook. All

48:57

the studies show that that's the

48:59

way to you distance

49:02

ourselves from from internalizing

49:04

those messages and from perpetuating

49:06

that problem. And I think it's important.

49:08

It's going to be different for everyone. Um,

49:11

it's going to be very individual. But I think

49:13

you need to take a hard look of at your

49:16

own patterns and what you know

49:18

about yourself. So for me, I know that I

49:20

have a very addictive personality and

49:23

so things are very all or nothing for

49:25

me. So moderation is actually very difficult.

49:28

I've had like thirty different

49:30

interventions with myself on how

49:33

much when I use social media, at what

49:35

hours, for how long? And

49:37

for me, I've decided that

49:41

because it's such an all or nothing game,

49:43

Sundays, I take off and my team

49:45

knows that, my husband knows that, like everyone

49:48

knows that, and so

49:50

I think being upfront with your needs

49:53

and I similarly, I hide

49:55

my phone, and my husband hasn't much more

49:59

healthy or relationship with his phone

50:01

and social media, and so we kind

50:03

of joke that he's my personal assistant, Like if

50:06

you need to get in touch with me, you

50:09

reach out to him. And to

50:11

me, it's like it's it is a sick addiction

50:13

that I absolutely will admit

50:16

that I struggle with. Mm hmmm, mm

50:18

hmm. Yeah, I couldn't agree

50:20

more. I feel like the brakes are so necessary

50:23

with anything in our lives, truly. I mean, it

50:26

gives you perspective. It makes you feel like, oh,

50:28

this is who I am. When I'm obsessed with

50:30

my phone all the time, or I'm missing out

50:32

on these moments because I'm looking at Instagram even when

50:35

my baby is right next to me. Those kinds of moments are

50:37

important for us to internalize and

50:39

then I feel like, yeah, it just gives you more of

50:42

your You're in the moment of this time

50:44

in your life. But it also really

50:46

just connect and that you know, as much as we

50:48

talk about the negatives of it, I think realize

50:51

what actually brings you the most joy from using

50:53

it? Why do we actually care about these things? Every

50:55

time we think about that, why do we care? And

50:57

it's for me It's like I can't believe that I

51:00

connect with, you know, somebody in Korea via

51:02

Instagram and then we create something together.

51:04

That's something that is such an incredible

51:06

use of the tool of these social

51:08

media So I feel like when we pinpoint

51:11

what brings us the most joy and

51:13

subtracts, I don't need to go through the comments. What am I

51:15

doing? Right? Why do I Why am I spending hours going

51:17

through these comments? How much joy is that actually

51:20

bringing me with any of these places? I

51:22

feel like the more we do that, the better

51:25

relationship will have with these

51:28

apps that we are obsessed with. Well, that's actually

51:30

where I was going to go with this, is like I don't think

51:32

the answer is to delete social media,

51:34

Like I like, that's not because there are so

51:36

many amazing things. I got to feel

51:39

like I was a part of your birthing

51:41

of your first child. Because and I

51:43

and I haven't seen you in over years,

51:46

like over a year. I got to feel like I

51:48

was a part of your process. And I feel like we still

51:50

get to have podcasts and we still

51:52

get to connect with each other. I met my girlfriend

51:54

on social media, Like, there is a lot that

51:56

you get to do. There's so many amazing

51:59

things about social media. What to

52:01

you, uh, both of you guys,

52:03

would be something that I just kind of just spilled

52:05

out everything that I love about social media. But

52:08

for you guys, it could be something different. Is there anything specific

52:10

about social media you had mentioned Max about connecting

52:13

with fans on the other side of the world and building

52:15

a fan base. You used to have to tour everywhere

52:18

to build a fan if you want to if you want fans in Korea,

52:20

you'd have to go to Korea and either open

52:23

up for somebody or do a tour or sing on

52:25

the street or promote your record there. And

52:27

now it's a lot different. How do you feel, Oh,

52:29

yeah, it's that exactly though. It's and even more

52:32

so in my specific position there's

52:34

so many artists that I'm connected with around

52:36

the world. Like a great example is this really

52:38

cool artist's name is Keshy. He's the bomb

52:40

if you don't know his music, amazing musician and

52:43

uh literally we dammed on Instagram and then

52:45

we both got you know, covid tested for a few days

52:47

and then he came over to my studio and we made some music

52:49

together. And that was solely

52:51

because Instagram connected us

52:54

and we saw mutual people that we worked with

52:56

and stuff. But that was the means of how

52:58

we not only it from point

53:00

A to point B. That was it

53:03

was like a text message or anything else,

53:05

but something public that we could utilize.

53:07

So I feel like there really are some magical

53:10

moments brought to you by Instagram,

53:12

were brought to you by Twitter, and and we can't

53:14

discount those. Oh absolutely. I mean

53:16

I think about the like our relationship,

53:19

you're my relationship has been strengthened

53:21

more on social media than it is everywhere

53:24

else. I've met so many amazing artists in Australia. Cody.

53:26

I met Cody on social media and yeah,

53:29

I've connected with I've connected with Cody

53:31

from that. Cody plays saxophone,

53:33

plays everything with Max. Literally that

53:35

dude, It's it's insane. Cody dot Deer

53:38

on Instagram makes I met him on Instagram to great

53:40

examples, he did a cover he did

53:42

a cover of one of my other group, this group called

53:44

Party People, as he liked just ripped sacks

53:46

over something. And he posts these videos and

53:48

he's been playing. He's toured around the world with us for

53:50

the last two years because we saw

53:52

a video of him ripping saxophone over our

53:55

cover of Miss Jackson. So as artists, it's

53:57

so it's been. There are so many

53:59

useful things. That's why I wanted to preface this whole

54:01

episode with I'm not antisocial

54:04

media. There's just sometimes where it's really bad

54:06

for me. But I do think it's important that we do point

54:08

out there are amazing things, because I think throughout

54:10

this episode, if you don't appreciate it,

54:12

then you can kind of fall into a like, well whatever,

54:14

let's just delete it. Um. Outside of the

54:16

artist world, Elizabeth, is what for you specifically

54:19

social media really done in a positive

54:21

way in your life? Yeah? You know what surprising

54:24

is it's actually helped my

54:26

own creative expression and my own

54:29

trying to show up in the world

54:32

is my whole self. That's kind

54:34

of one of my intentions

54:37

because I come from

54:39

Silicon Valley, Like I had that whole

54:41

life for a while, and that was one version

54:44

of me. And then I showed up in my business

54:46

as this very like authentic

54:49

but still very buttoned up.

54:51

It was like professional authentic. I still

54:53

had that part of me that was, you

54:56

know, painting my nails like light paint, you

54:58

know. And then I went through this whole phase of like everything

55:00

was black and I was like in this rebellious

55:03

phase. And now it's kind of coming into

55:05

my own and I see that it reflected

55:07

in my feed. And

55:09

I remember there was one day at the end

55:11

of last year and I was just like, oh, this just feels

55:14

too serious. Like yes, I talked about a lot of

55:16

serious topics and we go deep and I

55:18

love the heart to hearts and at the same

55:20

time, I was like that

55:22

that also isn't all of me.

55:25

I Actually I love dancing.

55:27

I love nineties boy band so I started

55:30

these uh Instagram live dance

55:32

parties, which was like so silly

55:34

and weird, and but also

55:37

that is as much me as

55:40

talking about my history

55:42

with an eating disorder or anxiety. That's

55:45

probably one of the things that I've most

55:47

gotten from Instagram is

55:50

the ability to just like play

55:53

with who I am and to and

55:55

to give myself permission to evolve

55:59

as my writing evolves and my content

56:01

evolves, in my personal growth evolves.

56:04

Yeah. Absolutely, So I have one I have

56:06

one last question for each of you, um, and

56:08

I'll start with you, Elizabeth. I think a

56:10

lot of responsibility obviously falls on ourselves

56:13

and how we view and how we how much time we consume,

56:15

and how much that we invest

56:17

ourselves into other things. But I

56:19

think a lot of weight also should be given

56:22

to these social media platforms.

56:24

And I think some platforms have done a really really great

56:26

job at at you know, you have your

56:28

TikTok um they started

56:30

implementing those like if you're scrolling for a certain amount

56:32

of time, like a TikTok will pop up and it's that guy

56:35

that everybody knows from Vine and he's like, hey,

56:37

you've been on TikTok for quite a while now, Like, why

56:39

don't we take a break. I've had that, So if I've

56:41

got to hit that every night this week honestly, because

56:43

I've been a TikTok feed this week. But there's

56:45

some things, or even Instagram when they wanted to start implementing

56:48

not showing how many likes you get and not

56:50

showing comments or um,

56:53

you know, different ways. But I also think that there's a lot

56:55

of things, especially in the visuals,

56:57

is really kind of where I am. We have all of these phil

57:00

turns on tickto and And this is

57:02

not to call any social media out again. We

57:04

just talked about how much we love social media. But like

57:06

TikTok has a mode that's called beauty

57:09

mode, and I think that there

57:11

shouldn't be Like, in my opinion, I think they should

57:13

remove it. I don't think that you should have a button that

57:15

a kid presses that makes

57:17

them now pretty because whatever

57:20

was before was not beauty, but now it's beauty

57:22

mode. Or same with the face, it's

57:24

like you can change your face to look as the way

57:26

that you wanted to and all of

57:28

these things. Elizabeth, how do you feel,

57:31

especially somebody who studies perfectionism,

57:33

um, how do you feel social

57:36

media apps and those platforms can

57:39

can make even more change, especially

57:41

in the visuals, uh and and

57:43

the and the societal standard that

57:45

that a lot of kids in today's world are are

57:47

gonna be dealing with if things don't change

57:50

absolutely. And I love the example

57:52

of filter because I've been thinking about that myself,

57:54

because I also

57:57

sometimes most of the time use filters,

57:59

and oh I use filters, by the way,

58:01

that is not me being like you shouldn't use filters.

58:04

I use filters. I'm gonna be I'm absolutely

58:06

the kettle. I'm the kettle and the pot at this point,

58:08

like I am both um and it's all about

58:11

to me. It's like, it's more so, how do we all stop?

58:13

Because I use beauty Mode and I look at beauty Mode

58:15

and I go, I just wish I looked like

58:17

that, you know, But but it's not fair

58:19

to say that. Yeah, And what's

58:21

interesting is I noticed all the filters

58:24

that I use on Instagram are of

58:27

like beautiful white women, and I'm mixed.

58:30

I'm half Chinese, and I have

58:32

had this whole, very

58:35

dark reckoning of my

58:37

racial identity. And it has

58:39

occurred to me, like just the other

58:42

day, I was like, gosh, you know, what

58:45

is that message? What am I sending

58:47

to my subconscious every time I use this

58:49

filter to be this like blond, like blond,

58:52

blue eyed person um?

58:54

And so I think we can go kind of even

58:57

deeper there in terms of not

59:00

just what the filters are telling

59:03

us about beauty, but also like,

59:06

what are these filters telling us about

59:08

race and our our

59:11

ability to love ourselves just the

59:13

way we are? And I think that's

59:15

something that is very important

59:17

to me as someone who studies perfectionism,

59:20

because the number one combatant to perfectionism

59:23

and learning to really love yourself is

59:25

that unconditional self acceptance

59:27

and self compassion. And so when you're constantly

59:30

trying to morph yourself into

59:33

what you think is

59:36

better or what the world truly

59:38

does perceive as more

59:41

beautiful, because that that is

59:43

the the zeit geys, that's

59:45

that is what we have told everyone,

59:47

then it just continues to perpetuate

59:49

that problem. So I think you're onto

59:51

something with with the filters,

59:54

um And I mean, the

59:57

other thing that just really gets me

59:59

is that kind infinite scroll of

1:00:01

those visuals, and it's it just

1:00:05

it's this never never

1:00:07

ending feeling of things

1:00:10

could be more, things could be

1:00:12

better, or I could look like this, or I could

1:00:15

oh, she's achieving that, and that

1:00:19

it manifests in the endless scroll and

1:00:21

it seems like, gosh, that's

1:00:23

just like a silly feature over here, but I

1:00:26

think inside of our minds, it

1:00:28

kind of it never allows that loop

1:00:30

to close. And so even after we put

1:00:33

away our device, it's still going.

1:00:35

It's still like oh yeah, and this and that and that,

1:00:38

and it's then, of

1:00:40

course we're never going to feel enough because

1:00:42

we are flooded with these images

1:00:45

that are different. Yeah,

1:00:47

I mean I opened I opened up, I opened up my fridge

1:00:50

multiple times, and the same stuff is in the fridge.

1:00:52

I open on my fridge five times in

1:00:54

an hour, and it's going to be the same thing. So

1:00:56

imagine if my fridge had a new thing every

1:00:59

time I opened it up, I'd be a pening it up every minute,

1:01:01

you know. And that's to me what social media is. As you

1:01:03

guys can tell, I'm very hungry, um

1:01:06

Max, now for your question. You're

1:01:08

kind of doing double duty. You and m are doing double

1:01:11

duty at this point because not only are you

1:01:13

living it and you are, for lack of better term,

1:01:15

feeding the machine by being a part

1:01:17

of this, especially in a in a huge way, you're

1:01:20

also having to be a parent. I remember watching a Ted talk

1:01:22

where um Steve Jobs was interviewed

1:01:24

about the new iPad and said, you know, do your

1:01:27

children like the new iPad and he's like, oh, they don't use

1:01:29

they don't use the like they're not like

1:01:31

And I feel like most of the most of

1:01:33

the tech monsters, especially

1:01:35

in Silicon Valley, they don't

1:01:37

let their kids do it because they

1:01:40

see the ugly in it. They see what's going on and

1:01:42

being a parent right now, Like my sister has a has

1:01:44

a almost two year old, and

1:01:47

in my mind, I'm like that, I don't know what what do you

1:01:49

do? You know? And how do you even

1:01:51

think about the next

1:01:53

ten years as your daughter, as

1:01:56

as Eadie Selene just grows up and

1:01:58

has to deal with this? Are you planning? Do you have do

1:02:00

you have any idea of what you're gonna do? I

1:02:03

feel like it's just all I keep talking with Emily

1:02:05

about is it. It's if anything, it is

1:02:08

more of a self reflecting moment because I

1:02:10

feel like it's just leading by

1:02:12

example. I don't I don't want to if I got to use

1:02:15

my phone and or I do all these things, I

1:02:17

don't want to. I don't want to be a hypocrite to her. I feel

1:02:19

like the only way I'm gonna be able to do it is tell her, you

1:02:22

know, if if I'm on my phone too much,

1:02:24

then I feel like she's gonna soak that in. So

1:02:26

I hope that we can just be you

1:02:29

really want to be the best example. But by doing that,

1:02:31

it's a responsibility to say, well, then I

1:02:33

really do have to hide my phone or when I don't

1:02:35

really need to use it, or tell her I'm on

1:02:38

my phone because this this this

1:02:40

manager texted me about this song. I'm

1:02:42

not ignoring you. It's like the communication

1:02:45

is interesting Emily as a really intense

1:02:47

psychology of it, because she was a nanny for seven years

1:02:49

and she baby sat and was the nanny

1:02:51

for so many other people's kids, and I think that made

1:02:54

her feel like, oh man, I don't want It's

1:02:56

the same thing. She's like, I don't want to ever have a nanny. I was a

1:02:58

nanny for seven years, just like how

1:03:00

these you know, silicon value people feel. But

1:03:02

but I do. I feel like anything that we

1:03:05

tell I tell my my baby

1:03:07

she can't do, it's just gonna be the opposite effect

1:03:10

exactly, And why why why are you doing

1:03:12

it? Exactly? Why can you watch TV or all these

1:03:14

things? So I feel like I the

1:03:16

only thing I'm gonna know how to do is

1:03:18

be able to say, you're right, I'm gonna

1:03:20

stop watching TV and go outside

1:03:22

and play with you because I don't. I

1:03:24

don't want to limit your experience with the world. And

1:03:27

I think that's the other thing for parents. You've

1:03:29

already experienced it and you want to be better for

1:03:31

your kids. But you know, I'm super new to this

1:03:33

game. But all I can think is like, but she hasn't experienced

1:03:36

anything I've experienced. She doesn't. She

1:03:38

needs to, She needs to explore

1:03:40

the world so that she knows what she likes and she doesn't

1:03:42

like the Hopefully we can instill some

1:03:45

values in her to to make those choices for

1:03:47

herself. I just want to keep trying to do

1:03:49

that, but it is tough. I have a little baby

1:03:51

cousin who's now nine, and she's I

1:03:54

had obsessed. Well, that's the thing. It's

1:03:57

not only how you treat your children. But then she's going

1:03:59

to go out into the war world where there's other kids who

1:04:01

aren't being regular, like, they're not being regulator,

1:04:03

they're not being led by example, and then

1:04:06

she's going to see pick up on that. Oh, she gets to

1:04:08

bring her iPad to school, so during lunch,

1:04:10

instead of running around and playing tags, she gets

1:04:12

to play, you know, Clash of Clans

1:04:14

or I don't know whatever the kids are

1:04:16

playing these days. But it's like it's just it's

1:04:18

everywhere, you know, and and right

1:04:21

now, the negativity is everywhere.

1:04:23

And I think that's the biggest thing is how do we, as

1:04:26

not only adults and not only as you

1:04:28

know, people who are are very fortunate

1:04:30

to have a following on social media, how

1:04:33

do we change the conversation

1:04:35

not just for e Selen, not just for my

1:04:37

Niemila, not just for that, but for the future

1:04:40

of This is where reality

1:04:42

is going to sit now. This is and social

1:04:44

media is very gapped from

1:04:46

reality at the moment, and I think how do we close

1:04:49

that gap and get it as close as we can. I think

1:04:51

it's always going to have a little bit of a filter on

1:04:53

it, and that's not bad to have a little filter on it, because

1:04:55

it's fun and and it is sometimes a

1:04:57

good way to get out of the world that you're

1:04:59

in at a moment and feel like you're in another place

1:05:02

and and kind of how concerts are for some people,

1:05:04

you know, sometimes social media can be that for me where I'm like,

1:05:06

I'm having a really bad day, but if I look at a

1:05:08

hundred memes. I'm gonna be really, I'm gonna be in a lot

1:05:10

better of a mood. You know. So how do we change that

1:05:12

gap? Your title the titles you

1:05:14

said. I think that's a big thing. It's that

1:05:17

is that is messed up. There shouldn't be a beauty

1:05:19

mode that you know, we shouldn't. I

1:05:21

think you can't. Like again, you can't get rid of filters

1:05:23

and all these things. But I do think how we title

1:05:25

them is important. I wouldn't want Eaty to

1:05:27

see a mode that tells her this is what

1:05:29

beautiful is, says yeah, beauty and then it changes

1:05:32

what ugly mode or whatever, you know,

1:05:34

that kind of stuff. That definitely that that

1:05:36

feels like a choice for these apps,

1:05:38

which are tools to make to say

1:05:41

we shouldn't say this because to this

1:05:43

especially tiny human, they're

1:05:46

reading that and there. That's that's what

1:05:48

the learning fels. You know. What one I like though,

1:05:50

is the baby one. That one That filter is great

1:05:52

because there's no it's not offensive to anybody.

1:05:55

You're just example like, that's perfect.

1:05:58

Let's okay, I'm gonna start a petition right now. We're

1:06:00

gonna make baby mode the only filter

1:06:02

allowed or old people remember the old people

1:06:04

one. Yeah, wrinkles and gray hair, those two

1:06:07

are totally fun. I think those ones are

1:06:09

fun, and it's and other than that,

1:06:11

we I think I could do without. But I think

1:06:14

you're right. It's it's just how do we

1:06:16

change the narrative? You know what is how

1:06:19

what do we what do we change about it? Do

1:06:21

we fix that? Fix beauty

1:06:23

modes so that it's just set to like you

1:06:25

know, lighting mode. The titles are definitely

1:06:27

toxic. I think my biggest takeaways

1:06:30

are that we allow

1:06:34

social media so often to govern

1:06:36

us when in reality, like you said

1:06:38

in my favorite I think one of my favorite lines that you said

1:06:40

today is that we it's a tool. It's not it's

1:06:43

not our life, it's not our it's

1:06:45

not our responsibility. It's not

1:06:47

like our If if we deleted

1:06:49

our social media tomorrow, then we're just going to continue

1:06:52

going on about our lives. So if we think

1:06:54

about it in that way and we take

1:06:56

the weight out of it and understand this

1:06:58

is the other thing is like understand that everybody is

1:07:01

thinking what we're thinking, and everybody's

1:07:03

we think everybody's going to judge us, but

1:07:05

everybody else is worried that they're going to get judged as

1:07:07

well, and it's just like how do we how do we alter

1:07:10

that? And so if you're listening to this, I'm

1:07:12

so glad that you got to listen to two

1:07:14

amazing guests on this episode who have

1:07:16

have an awesome grasp on things, and I'm

1:07:18

so grateful for both of you guys coming

1:07:20

on. Um, this is the wrap up segment.

1:07:23

It's called Shameless Promo, and I just want you

1:07:25

to talk about everything that's going on in your lives.

1:07:27

Where people can find you on social media, where

1:07:30

they can find your authenticity on

1:07:32

on social media hosts and all of that. UM,

1:07:35

go after Elizabeth, let's here, where can we find

1:07:37

you? Yeah, so you can find me

1:07:40

on Instagram at Hail Elizabeth Sue.

1:07:42

That's h e y Elizabeth Sue

1:07:45

s U. You can also sign up for

1:07:47

Monday Fives my newsletter which is super

1:07:50

fun on my website Elizabeth

1:07:52

Su dot com. And then, as

1:07:55

you mentioned, my biggest project

1:07:57

right now is my book and finding

1:08:00

a good home for that. So if anyone

1:08:02

knows of a literary agent or someone in the publishing

1:08:04

world that would be interested, shoot me

1:08:06

a message. I'd be grateful to connect.

1:08:09

That was Oh my gosh, Max, you gotta follow

1:08:11

that up. That was That might be the best shameless

1:08:13

promo that like just it was just so clean, it

1:08:16

was precise. Everybody knows where

1:08:18

to find you. Everybody's excited.

1:08:20

I'm excited. Do you have a title for the book yet?

1:08:23

I have a tentative title flawed feeling

1:08:26

worthy in a society that demands perfection.

1:08:29

I love those books that have books that have

1:08:31

a colon just are are automatically

1:08:34

big best sellers for me, Like, I'm going

1:08:36

after it, Max, Baby, talk to us.

1:08:39

My shame was from Yeah, my album

1:08:41

coverage is out, have a deluxe version with a bunch of

1:08:43

goodies on it coming out, and I think it's early

1:08:45

March. I got pushed poopy, but anyway, Yeah,

1:08:47

you can check that out. And then yeah

1:08:50

at Max Music and at Max where I got lucky

1:08:52

like YouTube and stuff. Some

1:08:54

some hockey player got it on Instagram. So at

1:08:56

Max Music, go for it. Don't you

1:08:58

hate it when your name just gets taken by somebody else

1:09:01

has your name? Yeah? Man, come on,

1:09:03

you're you're not. I'm going by this

1:09:05

one. Very hard to google name. You go, you

1:09:07

use your last name. I don't know my last

1:09:10

literally as a hockey player. You literally use

1:09:12

your last You have dates on your shirt. Your my

1:09:14

name is on my shirt. Your last name is on your shirt.

1:09:16

This is my max. I don't even know your last name.

1:09:19

I forget it. But if you're listening, if you're a big

1:09:21

fan Alex podcast, give me my damn

1:09:23

name on Instagram. That's our second petition. We got

1:09:25

two petitions going on one to get mad even

1:09:27

name on Instagram. Give

1:09:30

it to me, man, we want it. Um,

1:09:33

I'm so I'm so happy. Yeah makes you guys

1:09:35

listen to color visions. Color is great and if you're lucky

1:09:38

enough, you'll get color visions hoodie. That's how you

1:09:40

know you're a real one. Um.

1:09:42

I still rock my color vision hoodie to this day.

1:09:45

You guys know where you can find me at alex ion O

1:09:47

A I O n oh. Best part about having a weird last

1:09:49

name you don't have to compete with hockey players.

1:09:52

Thank you guys so much. This is the end of let's

1:09:54

get into it season one. If you want season two,

1:09:57

make sure you tweet my heart let them know that this

1:09:59

is what you want. This is how badly you want it.

1:10:01

I love you guys. Make sure you rate our podcast makes

1:10:03

you subscribe. That's how we continue to grow, and that's how

1:10:05

he gets season two. But until then, I love

1:10:08

you guys, peace. We

1:10:15

really want you to get the help you need, so if you

1:10:17

need help, please seek independent advice from

1:10:19

a competent healthcare or mental health professional.

1:10:22

The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are solely

1:10:24

those of the podcast author or individuals participating

1:10:27

in the podcast, and do not represent the opinions of I

1:10:29

Heart Media or its employees. This podcast

1:10:31

should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice,

1:10:33

counseling, or therapy. Listening to the podcast

1:10:35

does not established dr patient relationship with

1:10:37

hosts or guests of alex IONO, Let's Get Into

1:10:40

It or I Heart Media. No guarantee is

1:10:42

given regarding the accuracy of any statements

1:10:44

or opinions made on this podcast. Well,

1:10:46

if that's a doozy