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From NPR Music, I'm Anna

0:18

Maria Sayer, and this is AltLatino.

0:20

Let the cheese may be again. It's

0:44

just me this week. Felix is out on

0:46

some well teamed but definitely

0:48

well deserved long vacation.

0:51

While I'm doing the work and holding things

0:53

down, I'm taking a little bit of this

0:55

console myself. I'm talking you

0:57

all from Mythea's house in the rainforest

0:59

in Mexico. Enjoying some family

1:02

time in the place where it all

1:04

again. No spot felt

1:06

more perfect to intro this

1:08

week's guest. Fabi is

1:12

an all star performer, activist,

1:15

organizer, and honestly human.

1:17

I fell in love with Reyna because

1:20

smooth tropical beats and striking

1:22

lyrics. And I had no

1:24

idea that Fabi was shredding for bands

1:27

like Slaterkenny, and running

1:29

her own magazine. She shreds, a

1:31

magazine dedicated to women and gender

1:33

nonconforming comparison basis.

1:36

And she was doing it all

1:38

at the same time. I

1:40

couldn't imagine how one person had it

1:42

in them to make it all happen.

1:45

To be on their own path and following

1:47

their own dreams. And during

1:49

our conversation, I was lucky enough

1:51

to learn that for her, it's

1:53

all intuition, believing in

1:55

the swingles of her ancestors and

1:58

her own power to execute them.

2:00

She's mad connected to her

2:02

Vyleases and uses that as fuel

2:04

for her to advocate for the things she cares about

2:07

and Find peace in her own

2:09

choices. This

2:25

vision that you have. Is that

2:27

something that's always been present in your

2:29

life? I mean, a lot of these things like you started

2:31

playing guitar really young, you started

2:34

tread's really young. Like, a a lot

2:36

of the work you've done

2:39

as an artist, as a community builder,

2:41

even I would I would say started really

2:43

early for you is is that something that just

2:45

always felt natural? It was always inside of

2:47

you? Even a few years ago,

2:49

I maybe would have answered this differently or

2:52

maybe I wouldn't have had a clear answer,

2:54

but in connecting more

2:56

with myself and my ancestry and

2:58

listening to my

3:00

intuitive movements, we you know, that

3:02

have sort of led me to learning more

3:04

about Mishika culture. And My

3:07

ancestors from the homelands,

3:10

known as Mexico, the Mosheka

3:12

people, their

3:14

study was their dreams. They

3:17

migrated and moved with

3:20

their dreams, you know, and listening

3:22

to that. Their relationship to their intuition

3:25

was what dictated their

3:28

movements. You know, where did they decided to

3:30

go? And how

3:32

they decided to

3:34

leave Now that I'm

3:36

studying that, I'm realizing, like, that's

3:39

that's me. Like, that's always

3:41

lives in me. That's part of my lineage.

3:43

You know, that's what I understand

3:45

how to do and I feel more

3:48

than anything like the question to me

3:50

is how did I know how to follow that?

3:52

How have I always known, yeah, how

3:54

to follow that? I don't know. But

3:57

I have. Ever since I found music,

3:59

the guitar and found

4:02

a way to express myself. I've

4:04

always listened to

4:06

my intuition and I've always listen

4:09

to other types of communication

4:11

other than words, you know, and

4:13

been like, okay, something

4:15

about the music

4:17

industry that brought media and the

4:19

representation of women

4:22

and black and indigenous and

4:24

people of color in this media

4:26

doesn't feel right, you know, met

4:28

with the collective intention

4:30

of when those people come together to create.

4:33

And I just listened and was like, yeah.

4:35

Let's fill that gap. You know,

4:37

how I understand it is through

4:40

medium magazines because that's where

4:42

I saw the divide.

4:44

And so I just started

4:47

to move in that direction. And

4:49

people came, and opportunities came,

4:51

and I just kept

4:53

walking, you know, until yeah.

4:55

Until things changed. Few

5:19

and far between, I think, you people

5:21

in life who are really so in tune with

5:23

themselves and are so open

5:26

to receiving the signs. Right?

5:28

Like, oh, this is the

5:30

path that you need to be on. This is what you need

5:32

to be doing. I think, like, personally, that's

5:34

something I'm really trying to lean into

5:36

right now. We're really

5:38

it's like even saying that even saying that

5:40

feels like weird and, you

5:43

know, out of this world like something

5:45

that doesn't exist. Isn't

5:47

logical. And so

5:50

that makes us feel like, are we crazy

5:52

to even think that that's a communication

5:54

we could have? And so it's

5:56

hard to even have the words to talk

5:58

about it. You know, to talk about it in a way

6:00

that's validated. That

6:02

experience is valid. Just

6:05

because we don't necessarily have the words we

6:07

haven't been taught, how to speak

6:09

about it, doesn't mean that it's not.

6:11

The way that you describe it, right, you're like, oh,

6:13

and then I just will it

6:15

feels so effortless

6:18

-- Mhmm. -- in a way when you when you frame

6:20

it that way and then and I have to believe that

6:22

it wasn't. It wasn't. Right? Like, this is who you

6:24

are, is your person who just walks,

6:26

and also the things

6:28

that you've been doing, the things that you've accomplished,

6:30

to me doesn't feel like just walking, and

6:33

I wonder if at different points you ever

6:35

questioned that piece of yourself, you questioned

6:37

that ability to just kind of be like, no,

6:39

this is what I'm doing. This is what I have to be

6:41

doing. Like, was that

6:43

attention in inside of you? Or were you

6:45

just really sure? Like, this is

6:47

what I should be doing. I wanna start

6:49

by sort of saying that, like, we

6:51

all walk. Like, we're all walking.

6:54

Yeah. You know? We're all going

6:56

somewhere. We're either we like it or not. Exactly.

6:58

I think what you or

7:00

other people find interesting and

7:02

exciting about how I

7:04

walk is that it's

7:07

not easy to get to the point of

7:09

like trusting yourself and

7:11

being like, You know what? I

7:13

have an idea. I have a

7:15

seed and I'm gonna plant it.

7:17

I'm gonna actually plant it and see

7:19

if it grows. And then I'm gonna

7:21

see it grow patiently and I'm

7:23

gonna see what it blossoms into. And

7:25

when it blossoms, I'm gonna distribute

7:27

it and I'm gonna share it with people. So

7:30

that they have these seeds and they can

7:32

plant it, and they can distribute. And

7:34

that is a whole field. And

7:37

it's not easy to

7:39

do that because because that's

7:41

the history of our people. We've been severed

7:43

from that, from literally that

7:45

exact movement. We all

7:47

walk. It's just who

7:50

are we listening to? I've chosen

7:52

to listen to myself. That's

7:54

when my mom taught me. I was raised by a single

7:57

mom. That's all we had. We

7:59

just had each other growing up

8:01

as a kid watching your mom

8:03

hustle like that. Right. Were you

8:05

sitting there thinking about some of

8:07

these things at any point? Was that

8:09

was that a factor and what pushed you towards

8:11

this work? Were you sitting there thinking

8:13

about the possibility of

8:15

feeling of expressing in in a

8:17

creative way, I

8:19

do feel like I was. I was always

8:21

like, really quick. Like, even

8:23

watching videos of myself, I would just sit and

8:25

stare, and I'm sure I was thinking so, like,

8:28

crazy. I was like that too. I

8:30

was like that too. My mom, when I was in the

8:32

car, when I was little, we would be driving

8:34

around. She would, like, freak out. She would think I

8:36

had, like, something had happened to me because I was so

8:38

quiet in the car. For so long and she would look back and I

8:40

would just be staring out the window. Absolutely.

8:42

Just like envisioning another

8:45

life. Mhmm. You know? I mean,

8:47

yeah, essentially, that's what it is. You know,

8:49

I think for some of us that are

8:51

fighting for something different is

8:53

because we literally grew up dreaming

8:55

of another life. Dreaming

8:58

of wanting to see your

9:00

mom like sit down.

9:02

And have a meal. Just

9:05

wanting to feel a sense of

9:07

freedom, liberation, openness,

9:09

Do you feel like because I love to the way you talked

9:12

really about this idea of of

9:14

dreams caring our ancestors in

9:16

some ways that that they were driven by their

9:18

dreams, like, talking about

9:20

your mom and in the way that you

9:22

now have time and the

9:24

ability to dream, but she must have been

9:26

dreaming as well. Is

9:29

that something you could feel, or did it

9:31

feel like it was unique to

9:33

you? Definitely, she was dreaming. I

9:35

mean, she worked hard for us to

9:37

survive, but then there will be times where

9:39

she would just like pick

9:41

me up and we would drive to

9:44

Portland. That's why I live in Portland now.

9:46

It's because when I started playing

9:48

guitar, she saw an ad for the

9:50

girls' rock camp and was

9:52

like, I'm gonna take you there. So

9:55

She just, like, put me in the car and we drove

9:57

from Austin to Portland

10:00

and that changed

10:02

my life. That's the first time that I really realized that

10:04

women play guitar, that like there was

10:06

a whole other history of

10:08

music. My mom

10:10

was the first person to break

10:12

cycles from my

10:14

family. You know, she

10:16

had a kid outside of marriage.

10:18

Like, she raised me by

10:20

herself, all kinds of things, you know, that's

10:22

not that aren't common at all. So

10:24

yeah, she worked, but she

10:26

dreamed hard. And she made a lot of

10:28

her dreams happen and she continues

10:30

to through me. She told me that all

10:32

the time and I think now

10:34

it's like, well, now I get to make my mom's dreams

10:36

go true.

11:21

We'll be right back to this

11:24

conversation with Reyna. Don't

11:26

go anywhere. In stressful time,

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you wanna spend your time checking

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11:40

is with you five days a week to make

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sure that time is well spent.

11:44

Listen to the pop culture happy hour

11:46

podcast from NPR. When

11:53

you were young and you first started playing and you

11:55

went to that camp. Was that

11:57

something you said your mom took you

11:59

and and was that something that she

12:01

identified just really early on

12:03

in you? Was this spirit, this

12:05

desire to make music, to

12:07

perform? Like, what what was that

12:09

process

12:09

like? I think my mom

12:12

always want me to have a different life

12:14

than some of the things that she had to grow

12:16

up with. I think she always

12:18

wanted to make sure that

12:20

I followed and

12:23

I fought for what I wanted.

12:25

When I met the guitar

12:28

and I started expressing myself,

12:30

I was also really,

12:32

really angry. I had a lot of anger

12:34

growing up. So I I

12:36

literally think that one of the reasons why

12:38

she did that was to, like, just

12:41

help me because there were

12:43

definitely times in my life when

12:46

I didn't know what was

12:48

gonna happen to me. Especially when

12:50

I was younger and I was a teenager

12:52

and I think that music

12:54

literally saved my life, and I

12:56

think that community saved my

12:58

life. And that all started

13:00

because of my mom following

13:03

her intuition and being like,

13:05

I need to do this. Like, I

13:07

need to take her across

13:09

the country. Something's

13:11

there. You know, but I

13:13

think what it was was

13:15

strengthening that, like she

13:17

noticed that I loved something.

13:19

You know, that I loved the

13:22

guitar and I loved music.

13:24

And at that time, I was kind of I was,

13:26

like, ready to give it up and my mom

13:28

was, like, No. So

14:02

much of

14:04

your music is wrapped up in

14:07

so much more than just just

14:09

making something. It's it's wrapped up in the things

14:11

you care about. Your activism, you

14:13

know, caring about affluent indigenous

14:15

people and affluent Mexican

14:17

people. And all of different things and

14:19

when did that become a part of it? Like,

14:21

was there a point where you were like, this clearly

14:23

needs task to be. There is no me

14:25

making music without including

14:27

these messages? Was it just a natural

14:29

piece of of creating for you always?

14:31

When I started playing music,

14:34

there was this moment where

14:37

the lack of representation, the

14:39

lack of visibility, and the lack of

14:41

access to those spaces made

14:44

me want to

14:46

stop or even the

14:48

direct and explicit

14:51

exclusion made me

14:53

give up. When I

14:56

experienced that, I

14:58

was like No one

15:00

should experience this. Like,

15:02

no one should be

15:06

not allowed to do something because

15:08

of their gender or because of their

15:10

sexuality or their color of their

15:12

skin. So to me, I

15:14

look at women

15:16

musicians or I look at afro and

15:18

afro indigenous communities and I

15:20

look at indigenous

15:23

women who are being

15:25

killed, like, all of

15:27

that is a

15:29

part of all my music. And my

15:31

music is a part of that in, like, wanting

15:33

to make people feel connected to

15:35

themselves, you know, so that they're, like so

15:37

that they can be, like, wait,

15:40

what is what am I doing? You know, like,

15:42

what's happening? Why

15:44

are we making the decisions that we're

15:46

making and to just be

15:48

constantly questioning. I'm

15:50

Mexican, but I'm

15:52

also like a little bit separated

15:55

from Mexican culture as we

15:57

understand it, you know, as like

15:59

nationalism. And and

16:01

I feel really grateful for

16:03

that because I can see the ways

16:05

that Mexican culture has

16:08

excluded afro

16:10

Mexican voices and Aframxican

16:12

experiences and has

16:15

contributed to missing and murdered

16:17

indigenous women and the femicides.

16:19

And I wanna change that. You know,

16:21

like, to me, like, that's my

16:23

purpose. That's what I want my

16:25

music to do. And if it's not doing that,

16:27

then I'm doing something wrong. I'm not

16:29

following my path. So

16:57

when did you finally come to singing?

17:00

What was that for you? She

17:02

shreds was full on by two

17:04

thousand twelve. I spent

17:06

the next, like, four years

17:08

really trying to really building it,

17:11

putting the guitar aside, putting practicing

17:13

music aside. And in two thousand sixteen,

17:17

I got asked by Red Bull,

17:19

Music Academy, to

17:23

join a seven guitar ensemble

17:25

for this Glendronka orchestra.

17:28

They asked me the next in two thousand sixteen to

17:30

come to their music academy at Bonneroo,

17:32

and that's why I'm at Sumo. Sumo

17:35

and I just

17:37

immediately hit it off,

17:39

and we formed Reyna There

17:41

in our first recording sessions,

17:43

he was like, like, what do

17:45

you think? And I was like, absolutely

17:49

not. Like, I'm not a singer.

17:51

I'm not gonna sing. He

17:53

was like, just do it. And I was like, okay,

17:56

get me some tequila.

18:01

How all good things start? No.

18:03

Especially, I mean, singing. We're

18:05

talking about, oh, you remove everything with

18:07

the song and that tequila helps start the

18:09

fire in the belly that makes that happen. So

18:11

there you go. Totally. So

18:13

two thousand sixteen, I

18:15

started like, be, like, okay, I'm gonna

18:17

say. So yes. By saying,

18:19

we made that

18:21

year, we made And

18:25

I was like, just not I

18:27

was still not into it. I was like, this

18:29

is weird. My thing is

18:31

she shreds, but like put it out if you

18:34

want. You know, pretty soon after, actually,

18:38

NPR released our

18:40

first DP, like, on

18:42

like, a first listens thing. Mhmm. And

18:44

we were like, well, I guess people like

18:46

this. Mhmm. And so we kept going.

18:48

That initial meeting with

18:51

with Sumo and and that connection that you guys

18:53

kind of immediately form. I

18:55

feel like I've looked at a lot of the ways

18:57

that that you've described him

19:00

and something that really struck me as you called

19:02

him your soul mate in music and

19:04

partner in revolution. Was

19:06

that, like, was it

19:08

like just meeting him like

19:10

that? Was it initial just like fireworks?

19:12

In that way, I mean, it's so, like, unique

19:14

to have that kind of creative

19:17

connection with someone? Yeah, it

19:19

is. I mean, first of

19:22

all, I

19:24

wish It was not fireworks. I

19:28

love that.

19:30

That's even better. That's great.

19:34

We were, like I

19:36

mean, I was just, like, speaking of

19:38

trust, you know, I was

19:41

really hardcore with him about trusting

19:43

him. And I've always been very

19:46

III grew up, like, just

19:48

not really trusting man.

19:50

Yeah. You know, like, literally.

19:52

And so here comes

19:54

Sumo, like, wanting to collaborate on

19:57

music with me and telling me to sing and I

19:59

was like, full, like, get

20:01

out of here. Oh, even

20:03

are you? You know? And

20:06

so there was a lot of that -- Yeah. -- you

20:08

know, for, like, probably two

20:10

or three years literally

20:12

of, like, him trying to

20:14

gain my trust. Me trying to even

20:17

understand him as a

20:19

brown Mexican man being

20:21

very triggered by that and us

20:23

being in this constant dialogue

20:26

about it. But obviously,

20:28

it was our ability to, like,

20:31

communicate through frequency and,

20:33

like, just like I don't know how we're doing

20:35

this, but we can make a

20:37

whole song in three hours. That's what

20:39

the improv is telling us.

20:41

Like, there's something between

20:43

us. And that's what we're gonna

20:45

follow. And what eventually brought us

20:47

into like a balanced

20:50

energy between him

20:52

and I It was our

20:54

conversations about queer love and Aframechiko.

20:56

When I talked, he listened

20:58

to me about the injustices against

21:01

women and the murders and the violence

21:03

against women and

21:06

the sexism that's a

21:08

problem in Mexico, but

21:10

also in, like, the culture

21:12

that lives right here in Los Angeles

21:15

too. It lives. All

21:17

over. And it was really

21:19

important for me to know that he knew

21:21

that, that he respected

21:23

that, you know. And for him, It

21:25

was me listening to him

21:27

about Afro Makiko. You know,

21:29

the ways that the experiences and

21:31

the voices have been excluded

21:33

from Mexican culture. And what

21:35

it's like being

21:37

a dark skinned brown man

21:39

And both of us had these experiences

21:42

that he will never understand and I

21:44

will never understand. And that

21:46

keeps us really balanced. In

21:49

just like, okay, we're

21:51

listening. What

22:22

did having

22:25

a creative partner who was

22:27

able to not share your

22:29

experiences, but to feel them so intensely

22:32

and to to create within them. What did

22:35

that feel like for

22:37

you. I mean, that must have felt like like

22:39

love. That must have felt like I don't know.

22:41

What was that like? It

22:43

was definitely love. It was deep love.

22:45

It was kind of like I can't

22:47

believe this exists. No. Like I

22:49

can't believe like someone

22:52

is just willing to do that for

22:54

me. Mhmm. You know? And

22:57

have me in this lifetime

22:59

no matter what, like, It

23:01

felt like protection. And it was

23:03

funny because even though that

23:05

is deep love, we

23:08

are still very

23:10

Mexican. And we were when we just

23:12

always pretended like, we were just, like,

23:14

whatever. Like, brother, sister, like,

23:16

I don't have this I don't have,

23:18

like, it's too much to talk

23:21

about love, you know, between two of us

23:23

or whatever. So we always,

23:25

like, kind of, pretended like

23:27

it wasn't too deep. But

23:29

it was, you know, it was

23:32

I still it's hard for me to even

23:34

find the words because it's

23:37

hard to find anyone

23:39

who's willing to understand you

23:41

to the fullest beyond

23:44

what can understand on this earth. Like,

23:46

we would always say to each other, like,

23:48

I don't know what this is.

23:50

Like, I don't understand it.

23:52

Like, we don't understand what

23:54

the hell is happening right now. But

23:57

it's wild and we know

24:00

it's unique and we know

24:02

it's necessary. So

24:04

let's just do it. What does that connection

24:06

feel like now? First,

24:09

I always know that I

24:12

can find him in the water. Our

24:14

connection lives in the water. And

24:17

in the last even four months,

24:19

like, our music has literally

24:22

guided me to play

24:24

performing next to water in

24:26

moments where I needed that the

24:28

most. Like, where I felt like

24:30

the most it

24:32

felt the most difficult. You know?

24:35

So that's one way that that connection

24:37

survives. And I

24:39

also feel like abasthness. He's

24:42

so much more powerful.

24:44

His side of this, he's not

24:46

just one person anymore. He's

24:49

like, a whole collective of

24:51

people. I feel like

24:53

I find him in

24:55

my collaborations now. And in working

24:58

with organizations and

25:01

in, yeah, in so

25:03

many different places. One of

25:06

the first things that came to me when he passed

25:08

and continues to be

25:10

this way is trusting

25:13

my intuition. And making sure my

25:15

intuition is strong

25:17

and that my body is in

25:19

good health so that the intuition can be

25:22

clear. And that my practice and my

25:24

ritual and my routine is good so

25:26

that I know how

25:29

to follow the intuition, write it

25:31

down, see it through. At this

25:33

point now, like, that's where he lives. You

25:35

know, he's my ancestor. He lives in

25:37

my intuition.

26:19

Thanks again to Fabi from Rhaenatropical.

26:22

Also huge thanks to

26:24

our production assistants, Fio

26:26

Riley Jerusalem Truth and

26:28

Sophia Seidah. Big thanks to our

26:30

audio producer, Ron Scalzo, our

26:32

editor, Hazel Sills, and the

26:34

woman who keeps it all together,

26:36

Grace Chung. Also, big

26:38

thanks to the Hefein chief, Keith

26:40

Jenkins, VP of Music and

26:42

visuals. Felix will be back

26:44

with us next week, so

26:46

get excited. You have been listening

26:48

to, I'll let them know. Thanks

26:51

for listening.