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Vim, we're on! And today's guest,

0:48

we've got Maddy Fox. How are you? Hello, I'm good,

0:51

thank you. Good to see you. Thank

0:53

you. So, lost your job in lockdown. Yeah.

0:57

Now you get fucking a lot of work done to get your tits

0:59

and that done. Everything. Yeah,

1:01

since then. And now,

1:02

OnlyFans. Yeah, pretty much. OnlyFans

1:05

popping off. Very much so. So,

1:08

before we get into all the madness, I'll go back to the start

1:10

of my guests. Get a bit of finding out about

1:13

who you are, where you grew up and how it all

1:15

began. Okay, so

1:17

I'm Madison Fox. I'm from Horsham. I'm 30.

1:21

For me, it started, I'm one

1:23

of four. I'm the oldest. I've got

1:25

two brothers and a sister. Family,

1:29

we weren't rich. We were

1:31

far from it. We were very poverty-stricken.

1:34

But we lived in a very middle-class area.

1:37

So, most of my childhood was brought

1:39

up with my friends going on holiday

1:42

or having the best clothes and stuff.

1:45

And we just didn't, really, to be honest.

1:48

So, I just always felt like I was striving

1:51

to become something, do

1:53

something with my life. And,

1:56

really, when it started for me, properly,

1:58

when I came

2:00

out of a long-term relationship four years ago.

2:04

And I was a totally different person back

2:06

then, physically and mentally. And

2:10

really, that's when things started for me.

2:12

That's how I found myself and developed

2:15

this.

2:15

What were you like in your relationship?

2:19

I was with him since 21 to

2:22

like 27. So

2:25

I was learning

2:27

to become sort

2:29

of independent. And I've always

2:31

been opinionated. I've always been kind of

2:33

trying to be independent. But he

2:36

was more of the controlling aspect of

2:39

trying to tell me what to wear, what I can and cannot

2:42

say, how I should act. I

2:44

really was not allowed any type of autonomy

2:47

over my own life. So it was really hard.

2:49

And why did you stack it so long then?

2:52

Um, I think I was just trying

2:54

to find the world

2:57

power to leave. Because in a way, I

2:59

thought, maybe this is love. Maybe

3:02

this is what a relationship is. It's

3:04

supposed to be. And

3:06

deep down, I think I knew it was

3:08

so wrong on so many levels, even from day

3:10

one. But I think I was just

3:12

naive and just felt like

3:15

I always needed somebody. So

3:17

just tried to

3:19

stick it, tried to fix it with material

3:21

things, buying a house, you know,

3:23

getting dogs, cars, holidays. And

3:26

it just never, ever made me happy. Never

3:28

failed.

3:29

Once the dogs are involved, it's hard to cut away at. Exactly

3:31

it is. What sort of dogs? So

3:34

I've got two chihuahuas now. It's

3:37

not as if they're high maintenance. No, they're

3:39

not. I've got an up-wiler man like, it's a

3:41

fucking nutcase, so

3:43

he has an absolute crack-caught man like

3:45

chihuahuas. You can just put in your bag and fuck off.

3:48

Did you leave with the dogs? What's that? Did

3:50

you leave with the dogs?

3:51

Yes. Well, at this time, I only

3:53

had one of them. So

3:55

yeah, he didn't give a fuck.

3:58

So he just said, take the dogs. What were you

4:00

like before though? Not

4:02

flash, but were you out there the way you are

4:05

now? Or were you kind of reserved? Really?

4:07

Other Jaws have that in you, but he kind of suppressed

4:10

that.

4:10

Yeah, I definitely always had it in

4:12

me, but I was extremely

4:15

shy, reserved, always

4:17

felt like I didn't know how to interact

4:19

with people because he really made me feel

4:21

like kind of a bumbling imbecile.

4:24

So as if I'm not capable of anything

4:26

or like this walking mistake

4:29

really. And I knew deep

4:31

down that actually I am really, really smart.

4:34

I was smart on him and I just was

4:36

never able to have that,

4:39

you know, just independence of anything.

4:42

Yeah, well, that's been a purition on it. Yeah. It's

4:44

to put you down so that you feel as if you need someone. Yeah.

4:47

Do you know what I mean? So what happened after the relationship? Were you thinking,

4:50

fuck it, I'm gonna be me? Or are

4:52

you still kind of reserved, still trying to figure

4:54

it out?

4:55

So I immediately left

4:57

after Christmas of 2018, I

5:01

think it was. And

5:04

I had to move back in with my mum in her

5:06

spare room. So it was really difficult

5:09

for a long time. And I think

5:11

it was just the building blocks starting

5:14

to gain confidence of being single,

5:16

going on dates, meeting people,

5:19

you know, working on my own, my own money

5:21

for my own future. Not

5:24

that I did anything major before, but

5:26

it was just the start of being on my own really.

5:29

What job did you do? So

5:31

I worked for a technology company

5:34

in project management. So

5:37

it's so fucking boring. I

5:39

just hate it. And again, every day I would

5:41

walk into the office and I just

5:43

knew that I couldn't stick this out much longer.

5:46

And I know it sounds really dramatic, but every

5:48

day I walked in, I just felt like I had this

5:50

noose around my neck that was tightening.

5:54

And I used to just look out the window

5:56

and think, what the hell can I do

5:58

to make money, to escape?

9:59

for Babe Station, but their competitor.

10:03

And I had originally

10:05

just said, oh, no, don't worry about

10:07

it. You know, I can't work

10:10

for you guys. And then on the day I

10:12

got fired on the 18th of March, I

10:14

picked up a phone. I was like, I do any shift

10:16

any day, any time, any hour, every hour. I'll

10:19

be there. And so

10:22

it was a Babe Station type setup,

10:24

taking calls, working on TV. And

10:28

I won an industry award

10:30

within three months of doing it and

10:33

became probably the most successful newcomer.

10:36

So you've won that support,

10:38

then...

10:39

Ryan

10:58

Reynolds here from MidMobile.

11:11

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that that then just full steam ahead?

11:42

So full steam ahead on the

11:44

coming, working on television frequently,

11:47

late night, taking calls, doing coming.

11:50

And to be honest, I didn't really properly

11:52

do OnlyFans until last year,

11:55

last April, where

11:57

I flipped from predominantly doing Kamen.

15:55

and

16:00

a half grand. Fucking decent wages

16:02

though, aren't they? Very decent,

16:04

life changing. When did your mum find out? Oh,

16:08

my mum found out after I was

16:11

leaving my dogs with her

16:15

to go home and I'd

16:17

be like, oh, I'm just going shopping

16:19

with mum. And one

16:21

day I just thought, I'm making so much

16:24

money. I've got to tell her. And

16:27

it's really funny actually, because Louis Throude just did

16:29

a documentary on the website

16:32

that I was doing it off of like a week before.

16:34

And me and my parents had watched it. And

16:37

I said, mum,

16:38

I've got to tell you something. This is

16:40

what I've been doing. And she kind of

16:42

was just very silent, very reserved.

16:46

And she said, oh yes, I did think you might

16:48

be doing something like that. I don't know what that

16:50

means, whether that's like a sly

16:52

dig or anything, but no,

16:55

I mean, I think once you tell

16:57

people

16:58

what you're making, I

17:00

think it changes people's opinions of

17:03

it really. What sort of figure you're

17:05

making, can you say? What

17:07

a month now.

17:10

I mean, it's not a hundred grand

17:12

a month, but

17:15

it's near that way. No way.

17:17

Is that? Yeah, it

17:19

is. How many people have you got on your Onlyfans?

17:23

I got over 2,000 subscribers. And

17:27

all your fans? Yeah, a lot of them.

17:29

Cause I, so my particular look

17:32

is called Dollyfication, Bimbofication.

17:36

It's a specific fetish with looking

17:38

like a walking, talking, doll

17:41

Barbie, basically. And

17:43

people, come on back. Yeah,

17:45

surprising, I know. Yeah, no. Not

17:48

really, people, you look at the King Dabam Landers

17:50

and that, but I mean, they're the big test bar. Yeah,

17:54

it's always been in fashion.

17:57

But yeah, that's my fetish. That is my...

17:59

thing. What do people talk

18:02

to you like though? What when

18:04

they first meet me or when they're on cam? On

18:06

cam.

18:07

To be honest I have to

18:10

say that every guy I

18:12

ever speak to on cam or on OnlyFans

18:15

or anything is incredibly chivalrous,

18:17

charming, polite, like

18:20

I have never really had any problems with

18:22

any of them really at all.

18:25

What sort of things do you do on OnlyFans? So

18:28

mainly I do solo content.

18:30

I have done some boy-girl

18:33

stuff but not

18:35

too much in that.

18:38

Why

18:40

not? Because I'm

18:42

single and I think

18:46

if I really jumped in,

18:48

which I would do, I absolutely would

18:50

love to

18:50

do it, full on.

18:54

But it would be a huge no-no for so

18:56

many guys. It would hinder my ability to

18:59

have a meaningful relationship

19:00

a lot. And you feel as if you struggle to have

19:02

one nude because of what you do? Yeah definitely.

19:05

I mean I struggled before but it's

19:07

definitely an issue for guys.

19:10

Modern day guys do not like the fact

19:12

that your girlfriend can be seen online

19:15

nude. Not how you say

19:17

it.

19:17

Yeah I'm honest I'd be the same.

19:20

I don't know

19:21

if like I say I think majority men are quite

19:23

controlling but you've got to be honest. It

19:25

would be fine for three months, couple of months

19:28

and then the jealousy would kick in. Yeah.

19:30

People have seen my birds tits. People, do

19:32

you know what I mean? Like you get somebody who

19:35

will embrace you except for who it is.

19:37

I

19:38

think it's just become the norm now.

19:41

The fucking woman next door's doing it. It's not

19:43

as bad as it was 10, 20 years

19:45

ago. I think it's

19:47

just becoming so normalized. As long as

19:49

you're not hurting anybody do what the fuck you want.

19:51

Yeah. I mean like I'm no doubt you'll

19:53

meet somebody but see when you're

19:56

is that then always at the back of your mind that

19:58

you don't want to go

21:57

if

22:00

materialism feeds

22:02

success, like material things

22:04

don't mean you're successful. Everything could

22:06

be on the drip, like your watch, your car, anybody

22:09

can get anything hired or

22:11

rented out, like it's a

22:14

fake illusion sometimes social media. But

22:16

then you do what you're doing, people will see you as an object,

22:18

they'll not see you as a human being. So the longer you

22:20

do it, the longer you will become damaged. No matter what

22:23

people say, like I've interviewed enough

22:25

porn stars and

22:26

people who just started OnlyFans and I can see that

22:29

their mind doesn't decline, but they're

22:31

in love in a fantasy world.

22:33

Well, the real life doesn't really mean anything. You're getting

22:35

all the gifts and the money and people

22:38

being sweet to you.

22:39

These people be sweet to you as well, I'm only nine,

22:41

six weeks down the line if you're actually with them. So

22:43

you're loving a bubble and it's a good bubble to

22:46

be in. If somebody's been nice to you, then why not go there? If

22:48

you're getting paid through it, why not go there?

22:50

But then where's the fine line between normality

22:52

and

22:53

your own real world? No, you totally agree.

22:56

And when there's money involved, there's

22:58

always an element of, you know, sometimes

23:00

you could be doing something that actually you don't want to

23:02

do, but you have to because it's money

23:04

and you need to live and survive and progress.

23:07

So yeah, I mean, everyone's

23:09

got their price right. And there's

23:11

been times when I've been propositioned, you

23:14

know, with real serious

23:16

money to do things that

23:19

personally I feel is just a little step too

23:21

far. And

23:23

if I was in a different state of mind, you know,

23:25

would I be so strong with willpower and decline

23:27

these things? I don't know. I

23:29

can't. It's it is really difficult.

23:32

Yeah. You still see a lot of the girls

23:34

doing all the fans, still stripping, escorting.

23:36

Yeah. But it's

23:39

a shame because that's good people. You clearly get

23:41

your head screwed on as well. You're not daft, but you

23:44

can't let that leave.

23:45

You can't be too confident

23:47

on it because it can fucking suck you right in one

23:50

bad moment or whatever. Before you know it, you're

23:52

on a flight to the bay, getting fucking shard off

23:54

one of the some of the others.

23:56

You know what I mean? It happens,

23:57

man. Yeah, look, yeah, I

23:59

know it does.

25:54

the

26:00

society we're in now, it's fucking scary. It's

26:02

really scary. How lost we're becoming.

26:04

Yeah, and look, I see my friends,

26:07

I see people who I know

26:09

constantly getting surgery, changing,

26:12

and there is a fine line between

26:15

a

26:16

conscious decision and

26:18

having to do it because

26:20

you really hate the way you look and you think

26:22

you're ugly, disgusting, that kind

26:24

of thing. Because when I've seen people I

26:26

know change, I wouldn't say

26:29

that they've made themselves look more beautiful.

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I don't know, look, I can't see

27:36

myself from the outside in, so

27:39

I don't know what I would say about myself, but

27:42

I've had real troubles with my family,

27:44

with what I have done to myself

27:46

as well. Very difficult.

27:48

When are you at your most confident? When

27:50

am I at my most confident? I

27:56

don't know, it's a good question. I

27:59

think... just every day

28:01

I try to be, but there's

28:04

always a niggle of,

28:07

oh, I need to get this done, this done because

28:09

of the competition aspect. But

28:13

no, deep down,

28:15

when I'm thinking about it clearly, clearly

28:17

I'm like, yeah, do you know what? I am a

28:19

catch. So I try to. You've

28:22

got to be confident, fucks, especially your job,

28:24

man. Yeah. Where do you go?

28:26

But how many

28:27

subscribers and subscribers on Onlyfans?

28:30

Yeah. What's enough then? Is it 10,000? Where

28:32

do you go?

28:33

Yeah, I've got a personal target

28:36

in my head of what I want

28:38

to earn, where I want to go with there.

28:42

But yeah, it's never enough. It never, ever,

28:44

ever is enough. Does that not scare you?

28:46

Yeah, it really scares me. It really,

28:49

really does because, you know, look,

28:51

I know where I've come from. I have

28:53

had nothing before and most

28:55

of my life. So it's only now

28:57

that actually, and now I

29:00

feel myself, I am getting disconnected

29:02

from reality. You know, I hear my sister

29:05

and her boyfriend, you know, moaning

29:07

about buying Domino's because it's like 40

29:10

quid. And I'm like, you know, that

29:12

is a lot of money to spend on one singular

29:14

meal. And look, my mum

29:17

struggles and stuff. So, you

29:19

know, the way that I feel is I want to do good

29:21

for me and my future and my family. So I

29:24

don't know.

29:26

Yeah. But if you're making top dollar, that's the only

29:28

thing that can keep you going as well, no matter if it's good

29:30

or bad. You're doing life. I've done a lot of bad stuff, but I need

29:32

to get money because I thought I can retire

29:34

my whole family can do good. Karma came

29:37

and got me. Now I'm trying to do in a more productive way

29:39

where it's more natural and

29:41

it's harder because it's

29:44

easier to do bad than my life. But

29:46

it's just trying to do the right thing. And you probably have that

29:48

target in your mind. It's not a bad thing that you're doing, but you have

29:50

in your mind. You can retire your mum, you can retire

29:53

your whatever. Trying to

29:55

buy them a Domino shop. You

29:59

know how easy it is to be

29:59

I wouldn't even say it's easy because

30:02

it must damage something doing

30:04

that sort of job. But especially I have to message

30:06

everybody as well.

30:07

Yeah, of course. How many messages

30:09

are there? You know, everyone's

30:12

from a different time zone. So

30:14

you know, you won't have loads of people

30:17

online at once. Everyone's doing different

30:19

things at work. They have to go to work themselves

30:21

and live a life. So it's not too much.

30:24

It's OK. But yeah, it's all consuming.

30:26

Every time of day it's on my mind. When

30:29

you work for yourself, you can't really switch

30:31

off properly. So it's really, really

30:33

difficult

30:34

to balance. People

30:38

can send you videos,

30:40

photos, voice messages,

30:43

anything and everything and vice versa.

30:45

The people probably take the huff that you've knocked mercies

30:47

back. Yeah. Oh,

30:49

majorly. Yeah. I had a situation at Christmas

30:52

where my grandmother died

30:55

on Christmas Day, actually. Thank

30:57

you. And I had

30:59

booked

31:00

in a week before a

31:02

video call on the boxing

31:04

day and I was

31:06

messaging this person like, I won't be

31:08

able to make that time.

31:11

And he was basically

31:13

just like, I want to refund.

31:15

It's like, dude, I've literally explained

31:18

to you, I can't get that to that time, but I can

31:20

get to you at this time. No, no,

31:22

you've cancelled on me. Blah, blah, blah.

31:25

I had a conversation with somebody earlier

31:28

a few weeks ago before that that said,

31:30

you know, you need to hold back on how

31:33

much you do tell people about your personal

31:35

life. So I didn't tell people

31:38

that I was going through grief,

31:40

basically. And then, you know,

31:42

I had to then explain it to this guy and he

31:44

was like, well, why didn't you tell me

31:45

sooner? Are you crazy?

31:47

You expect me on the day

31:50

to be like, hi, Gary. Yeah. So

31:52

my nan's died. I can't make the video call tomorrow.

31:55

People are crazy, but look, that

31:58

I am a service.

33:52

If

34:00

you're making so much money man, like how do you sleep?

34:03

I'd be fucking two hours a night, buying

34:05

straight up again. But the time I work

34:07

us, I'm moking you bastard

34:09

for what I can. That's what I'm thinking.

34:11

Yeah, it's very hard, minimal

34:14

sleep. I do find it hard

34:17

to wind down and yeah,

34:19

it's very, very difficult. It is because

34:22

my whole life is dedicated to

34:24

serving other people. And

34:27

then the only person daily

34:29

really that I see is my

34:31

mum and she's working. And I literally

34:34

get zero attention from

34:36

anybody, you know, legitimately in real

34:38

life, which is crazy because

34:41

what is that doing to me?

34:41

It's basically teaching me unless

34:44

someone pays, I'm not

34:46

valued or it's

34:48

honestly, mentally, that is a struggle.

34:51

Do you feel cheap? I

34:55

think I always walk around with a

34:57

chip on my shoulder that I still feel like,

35:00

you know, I'm not worthy

35:02

and I'm not the person that I am

35:04

today. Definitely. What's different?

35:07

Part of it bag up, that's the teeth bag

35:09

out of that.

35:11

Yeah, what's different? I'm

35:15

mentally so strong than

35:17

I was four years ago. I don't take shit

35:20

from people. I'm not scared of anybody.

35:23

I will say boo to a goose

35:25

and I'm confident in who

35:27

I am as an individual. I am

35:29

proud of myself. So, so proud

35:32

because if someone had told me, you know, I'd

35:34

be sat here today four years ago, literally

35:36

would have laughed you out of the room.

35:38

So, but

35:40

money does give you confidence because

35:43

you come out of stage. We don't know. It's not that you need

35:45

anybody, but sometimes we've not got anything. You

35:48

tend to people please a bit more. Yeah. You

35:50

start getting a bank on your finger. I don't need to take your shit

35:52

off. It does

35:54

grow a bit more confident, but you working

35:56

on yourself and getting things done. You probably

35:59

wanted those stuff done. a long time. Do you ever

36:01

go through any bullying or that when you were younger?

36:02

Oh yes, I hated

36:05

school. School was dreadful. Bullying

36:07

was rife. I felt like I was in a prison

36:09

daily amongst these complete

36:11

animals and I absolutely hated

36:14

every single day of school.

36:15

What about

36:17

boyfriends and stuff, no relationships?

36:19

How do people treat you as an object?

36:21

Like do they see you?

36:22

Yeah, it's

36:25

definitely, yeah, they do treat me like an object.

36:27

It's a badge of honour. Oh, I've taken a babe

36:29

station girl and only fans go.

36:32

It's badge of honour to say to their mates

36:34

and yeah, it's very shocking really that

36:36

people treat people like that.

36:37

But the stuff that you're doing as well and

36:40

you know what men are like then, how can you trust a man?

36:43

I can't.

36:44

I won't. Simple answer.

36:47

I can't. You can't trust, to be honest,

36:49

in life the only person you can trust is yourself

36:51

and that is what I go by. Look, I'll trust

36:54

everyone until you give me a reason

36:56

not to. I'm not one of these people

36:58

that's looking on your phone. I'm

37:01

not that girl. So

37:03

I have a certain level of confidence with

37:05

regards to that and trust. But

37:08

I never trust someone 100%. No

37:10

way. Because look, I've seen

37:13

how people behave online,

37:15

you know, behind the clothes table.

37:18

They could have a wife for 20 years and

37:20

she never knows this secret. It's

37:22

pretty crazy how people are

37:25

different online. It's

37:26

crazy how people operate. You just don't

37:28

know. You genuinely don't know. Yeah, I've

37:30

no idea. Those fuckers are up to you. They're

37:32

at you, they've got partners, they're wives.

37:35

Yeah. I've had people that are

37:39

sleeping in the room with the girlfriend

37:41

on the phone and she's in bed.

37:44

It

37:44

is crazy what they'll get up

37:47

to. It's mental. And

37:49

as well, when you open an OnlyFans,

37:52

you must expect that your neighbour,

37:55

your brother's friend, a

37:57

family member, all these people

37:59

will go on your OnlyFans to see

38:02

what is on there. Literally, the number

38:04

one people you can count to sign up will be

38:06

anybody that knows you. Old

38:09

school friends, work colleagues,

38:12

anybody and anyone will go on

38:14

that page.

38:14

But that's what the faiti shows on that as to...

38:18

Men, what do you get women for, don't you? I

38:20

have had a few, yeah. Very,

38:22

very rare. Do you buy anything

38:24

yourself? Um... I wouldn't

38:27

have a relationship with a girl, but...

38:30

maybe have sex with a girl, maybe.

38:33

I mean, do I fucking buy then, though? I

38:35

don't know. I don't know if that

38:37

makes me buy. I have no idea. I've never

38:39

even thought about it. Look, women

38:41

are hard work, men are hard work at the

38:43

best. I just... I would never ever be

38:46

in a relationship

38:46

with a girl, no. Not attracted to that. Yeah,

38:48

why is it... why is men and women...

38:51

everybody's becoming hard work? You know that?

38:53

Not feel that?

38:54

Because everybody leads

38:56

this solo life where

38:59

everything we do is... it's

39:01

so low, I'm doing this. No-one

39:03

ever considers anybody else anymore.

39:05

It's all a selfish now, now, now attitude.

39:09

Empathy is low. Honestly,

39:11

people's ability to have a conversation

39:13

and understand one another is at an

39:15

all-time low. That's why everyone's opinions

39:18

are so...

39:19

you know, different nowadays. How

39:21

do you deal with online stuff, Charles? So,

39:25

TikTok for me is the worst for

39:27

Charles. Every single

39:29

comment, fake, fake,

39:32

you know...

39:33

just anything nasty, they

39:36

will say it. Even the smallest

39:38

detail, right?

39:39

They've got it. They'll lock it down until

39:42

you get bored and blue in the face, they'll keep

39:45

saying it. And even if you admit, please

39:47

don't say that, that will upset me, we'll just

39:49

only make them

39:50

say it more. How do they

39:52

deal with that? Um... I

39:55

do have days on... especially on

39:57

TikTok lives, which I do very often.

39:59

where I just can't take anymore.

40:02

I am strong every day I have to back

40:04

my shit up. Look how I look, right? Do

40:07

you think I would look this way if I had

40:09

any element of not

40:11

being one, you know, I'm not, people

40:13

assume because I look like this, I want

40:16

attention. And actually it can be further

40:18

from the truth. I literally look this way because

40:20

I just fucking like it. It's not that deep.

40:23

And

40:24

because I do look this way and it

40:26

does get attention the way

40:29

that people perceive that is just,

40:31

oh, they just won't let it lie.

40:33

What's the one thing that boosts your subscribers?

40:36

But what do you do? How do you keep them coming back? I

40:40

think just the fact that I am genuine

40:43

and what you see is what you get, I really

40:45

build a relationship. You know, some of my subscribers

40:47

I've been talking for three years. Some of

40:50

them talk to me more than my actual

40:52

friends. So, you know,

40:56

it's building a relationship really. It's

40:58

treating people as you want to be treated. And,

41:00

you know, I receive something

41:03

from it and hopefully they receive

41:05

something from it as well. What about

41:07

friends and stuff? Once they found you and only finds

41:09

that we're not asked or someone I'm thinking,

41:12

fuck her. Obviously

41:16

my whole transition was during

41:18

lockdown. So most people

41:21

found out during lockdown and

41:23

when everything was weird anyway,

41:27

people were interested, people were surprised,

41:29

like, oh, wow.

41:32

It's been positive from what I've heard,

41:35

but I guess if it was negative, they

41:37

probably wouldn't say it to my face. But

41:40

again, once people realize

41:43

how much money you can earn and the potential,

41:46

everyone's like, oh God, I want an OnlyFans,

41:48

you know, it's that mentality.

41:49

What's the more somebody's

41:51

offered for sex? A

41:56

lot, like hundreds

41:58

of thousands. Where? Where

42:02

is this person? Yeah. In

42:04

London? He's actually very well known.

42:07

So he's a bit of you?

42:08

He's well, I wouldn't call him a

42:10

celebrity, but we probably shouldn't talk about

42:12

that. How are your family? I don't

42:14

know, just someone with money. A

42:17

couple hundred bags? A

42:20

couple hundred. Yeah, a lot. Like

42:23

we're talking a lot. And I've heard about

42:25

how much people have received from this

42:27

person and it's a lot. It's a lot.

42:30

It's a fuck of a lot. Life changing.

42:33

Bank transfer, like cash.

42:59

Plus free shipping with the code soldogenero10.

43:03

If

43:29

I could have that in cash, yes please.

43:34

The

43:36

more I dick. So

43:39

why did you reject that? I rejected

43:42

it because once you

43:44

go from online to in person,

43:47

that is what fucks you up. That's

43:49

when you lose yourself. Because if

43:51

I don't have autonomy over what

43:53

I actually do with my physical body, I have

43:55

nothing left in life. It's done.

43:58

You go on, your head is gone.

43:59

gone. How much did they offer? Like

44:03

200k, like a lot. And that was like minimum

44:06

of what would have been on offer. Tell them how

44:08

fucking shag them.

44:12

See, money talks. Look, this is

44:15

the

44:17

crazy thing. Money talks.

44:19

You can make, if you went out on the street right now

44:22

and you said, look, I'll give you a thousand pounds to do this,

44:24

I guarantee you will have a success rate

44:27

of 99.9%. It's mad,

44:28

isn't it? But again, you've got to value yourself.

44:31

I always tell that

44:33

to my daughter and that as well. You must value yourself

44:35

always for a very young age. Don't have a letting about the disrespect

44:38

you. That's a sense of a power trip

44:40

as well. You then become a target

44:42

because you're rejecting that. More offers,

44:44

more money. But then that could be just your manipulation

44:46

skills. You know how to play the game to

44:49

get that up to half a million.

44:51

Do you know what I mean? Like fair fucking play. A

44:53

million in order. Do you know what I mean?

44:56

Because some people with serious money,

44:58

everybody's just upon in that game. It's

45:00

true. Money is power. That is clear

45:03

with everything. And this is the thing. Once you

45:05

have money, what else do

45:07

you want in life? It's power, isn't it?

45:09

Why do people go into politics? Why do people

45:11

go into business, you know, multi-million

45:14

pound businesses?

45:14

It's power. It's

45:17

just power trips. That's exactly what it is. Because nothing

45:19

has any value to them anymore.

45:21

Absolutely. Because if money

45:23

is trickling, I've seen it. I

45:26

see how it sends people into this

45:28

egotistical thing. And I think that's what I

45:30

was trying to say earlier with the Instagram

45:32

posts. People don't understand. And

45:35

we all do it to each other equally. We're

45:37

all responsible for what we put online and how

45:40

the perception is received by people looking

45:43

at it. It's all for an ego

45:45

trip. We want people to be like, oh,

45:47

wow, look at that car. Look

45:49

at that handbag she's got on her

45:52

arm. And I just don't want to play that

45:54

game because you can't ever win. You

45:56

can't be the best because a billionaire

45:59

will sweep in.

45:59

and have 20 schnells,

46:02

you know? And I just, I understand

46:04

that you can have all the money in the

46:06

world, but honest to God, it is

46:09

happiness that matters. It's being

46:11

at peace and happiness. It's

46:14

worth so

46:15

much more than money. How long

46:17

you been doing this? Coming up three

46:19

years. It's all fresh,

46:21

aren't it? Very fresh, yeah. I feel

46:24

fresh. But

46:28

it's still a mad industry, isn't

46:30

it? It's like porn industry, it's sex

46:33

work, that is crazy. I know girls

46:35

who just do it in their brand pants

46:37

and they still make a little crust in that, but

46:40

do you feel as if the more hardcore you become, the

46:42

more money you make?

46:43

I know that if I

46:45

went in tomorrow and did

46:48

hardcore porn, I'd be

46:50

a millionaire. There's absolutely no

46:52

doubt, 100%.

46:55

It just would happen. Honestly, if

46:57

I did interracial, if

46:59

I did all these things, I'm telling you, it'd be

47:02

so minted. I just know it,

47:04

because there's gaps in the market, because

47:07

women are reluctant to do

47:10

it and go fully into the hardcore

47:13

porn

47:13

world. But

47:16

why is fucking porn sites a free lad? Why

47:18

do men pay that? Is beyond

47:21

me why they get sucked in?

47:23

Why is that?

47:25

Porn is free to access online, but

47:27

that's because the adverts you're watching is

47:29

paying for you to receive it for free.

47:33

I think when it comes to OnlyFans, it's much

47:35

more of a personal service. If

47:38

you have a favourite celebrity, I don't know,

47:40

let's say Brad Pitt, and you could talk to

47:42

him online and get

47:44

him really to do anything

47:46

for you and say anything,

47:48

wouldn't you do it?

47:50

Again, it's an ego stroke

47:52

to a lot of guys, because they want

47:54

you to,

47:56

oh, can I meet you? Can I

47:58

do marriage? you

48:00

anything really so if you've got to

48:02

do stuff and on the camera for them as well

48:05

yeah yeah yeah

48:07

everything all the

48:09

time yeah do you ever

48:12

get a day off um yeah

48:14

I do I do take time off now I'm

48:17

much better in at it now during

48:19

lockdown I was working like 15 hour

48:22

days I'd been like be online

48:25

and literally I'm not I am NOT joking

48:27

it was call after call after call

48:29

after call I would smash it

48:32

so what sort of shit are you doing? Cleaning

48:35

yourself? Fucking business

48:37

suspects? Yeah

48:39

all the usual suspects so

48:42

dildo play anal

48:45

staff you know

48:47

boobs That's not what

48:49

I graft but isn't that? That's not what

48:51

I graft man like you must fucking sleep

48:53

well it is a lot of graft

48:56

mentally and sometimes when you get a request

48:59

you're just like you

49:01

know oh god not today but you

49:05

just got to suck it up and you know I'm

49:07

just really ambitious I really want

49:09

to change my life and I am

49:11

and I've got a personal goal in mind I

49:14

really just want a huge fuck off house

49:16

and then I'll just be able

49:18

to chill and go on holidays

49:20

and you think that as

49:22

well? Yeah I know no and I

49:24

understand that that's always the goal it just

49:27

you're always wanting more

49:29

but I definitely feel like I'm just learning

49:32

that you know

49:34

if you buy a Louis Vuitton handbag

49:36

right it's still just a handbag

49:39

you've just paid two and a half grand for it it's

49:42

it's just not what you think it is and

49:45

you're always wanting more like during 2020 after

49:47

doing this very early on

49:48

I bought

49:51

a car like a different car went

49:54

from a Fiat 500 to a Jaguar F-Type and you

49:58

know it's still just a car and

51:59

And

52:02

I've done the mental work

52:04

I've had counselling over vast

52:06

amount of years. I've done that legwork

52:09

and I know that I am of sound mind.

52:11

I know a lot of people won't believe that, but it is

52:14

true.

52:16

And yeah, through

52:18

reading this particular book that I was reading. What

52:21

did you read? Happy Sexy Millionaire

52:24

by Stephen Bartlett. On the very last

52:26

page, he explains, there was research done

52:29

on very elderly people with what

52:31

their life, what their number

52:33

one regret was in life. And

52:35

they said it's

52:37

not living, you know,

52:39

unapologetically as myself,

52:42

as I wanted to do, you know. Why

52:44

do so many people come out gay 40 years

52:47

after and things like this? So many people are holding

52:50

themselves back for fear of being

52:53

critiqued, what people will think. I

52:55

honestly just do not give a fuck anymore because

52:57

I don't live life for anybody but myself.

53:00

And I respect people that are

53:02

just unapologetically themselves.

53:04

But that's why it's so easy to be successful

53:06

now, because everybody's weak. Everybody's scared

53:09

of other people's opinions. But

53:11

when I bought that podcast and

53:14

I thought, fuck it, man. And the people I interview, they even

53:16

put a post out today that people still complain of.

53:18

I've interviewed murderers, drug lords,

53:20

fucking

53:21

bombers, porn stars.

53:24

And people still say I'm unfollowing you. I'm

53:27

not saying who fucking cares, like I say,

53:29

no, I can't care about your departure.

53:32

Do you know what I mean? I genuinely don't give a fuck. I'm here

53:34

to create content. I'm here to make money, feed my kids

53:36

and live a better life. And

53:38

just try and gain some freedom where I

53:40

know I can retire at any fucking minute. That's

53:43

why I work so hard right now. But I'm like

53:45

yourself, can I though? Can

53:47

I? I've got a cut off point. I don't know because

53:49

I'm an addict, but I love, I need hustle.

53:52

I need to go up to something so it scares me that

53:54

while I've been starting, should you ever stop? Like you see people

53:57

in their 70s and 80s, they

53:59

retire.

54:00

And then the fucking day Do

54:02

you know I mean that leave is too short for me? It's just

54:04

a big game play the game right just enjoy it as

54:06

well as much as you can Yeah, but we

54:08

go what made you get counseling?

54:10

My past

54:13

relationship it was sending me

54:15

crazy With my ex

54:17

I was with for six years You know he

54:20

would tell me why couldn't wear what

54:22

I could look like and it

54:24

just sent me so mental Sorry

54:28

mental

54:29

Look

54:34

I know for sure that they've signed up

54:37

so they first design up so

54:39

is This

54:41

thing about men is it's scary. There's no not

54:43

much lawyer anymore And they don't

54:46

need to be loyal if somebody's birds on fucking only

54:48

fans. I'm just saying in general that I Don't

54:51

know man. I've got good friends, and I've got

54:53

good family now, but I don't see much lawyer

54:55

way outside of that I've

54:57

got enough friends now. I don't want any

54:59

new ones first. I think I don't fucking

55:01

trust the country I mean, but let's

55:03

just

55:05

Have you ever seen him since your ex

55:07

never have a health problem?

55:08

Um I have spoken

55:10

like very briefly not of anything

55:13

really on

55:15

Facebook messenger, but nothing

55:17

you know congratulatory

55:19

to me no I I would

55:22

love to know what he thinks actually be fascinated Because

55:26

I am so so different or at

55:28

least I think I am But

55:31

no no never heard from him properly

55:33

since

55:33

think part of you who you've

55:35

become there was because Of

55:38

him oh, yeah Absolutely

55:42

and of my schooling as well

55:44

just being believed and never

55:47

you know I have severe dyslexia So throughout

55:49

school. I was always you know bottom

55:51

of the class Struggling you

55:53

know through my whole life. I just

55:56

had this thing that I was just never good enough

55:58

at work They were

55:59

would critique me over, you know, doing

56:02

a spreadsheet in pink rather

56:04

than blue and all these menial

56:06

things. And I just

56:09

never felt good enough. And actually that is one

56:11

thing that, you know, with this industry,

56:13

with what we do, it's not exactly one

56:15

of those things that people pat you on the

56:17

back for, you know, job well done.

56:21

And that is what I'm looking for actually,

56:23

is just people to be like, yeah, do you know what? You

56:25

came, because my life could have been so different,

56:28

right, through lockdown.

56:29

There honestly was no other jobs. And

56:32

that is part of the reason why I started doing

56:34

it. I would do anything just

56:36

to survive. There's nothing I wouldn't do.

56:39

You know what I know? I'm

56:43

talking about working a bit. Donald's here,

56:45

okay. But yeah,

56:48

like, honestly, it was like

56:50

do or die. And I could have lost

56:52

my house, my car, and literally

56:55

been sent straight back to the beginning,

56:57

and I was like, I have to move in with my mum again.

57:00

So I've honestly, I've pulled myself

57:03

out of poverty. I don't understand, I don't

57:05

think people understand just how hard that is

57:07

to do.

57:08

Yeah, you're making money. That's the

57:11

thing is, like it's either that become

57:13

homeless or whatever. You found an avenue and you're stuck.

57:15

Listen, it takes courage, it takes courage, especially in this

57:17

day and age where everybody's got an opinion. Do

57:20

you know what I mean? But you do you, as long as you're not harming

57:22

yourself, and as long as you're not, it doesn't

57:24

fucking deteriorate that mindset, because

57:27

we're all guinea pigs for only fans and mobile

57:29

phones. We genuinely don't know how it's gonna affect humans.

57:32

In 20, 30 years, I've got a rough idea myself how

57:34

it's gonna go, but

57:36

then now it's fun, then now you're making money, and now

57:38

you're getting all the B perks that you think you want, but

57:41

five years of that, 10 years of that, man, I don't

57:43

want you back on this podcast and you're looking like fucking

57:45

Madonna.

57:46

Look, I can't promise

57:48

anything, but look,

57:51

if I could earn 1.2 million pounds a year through

57:54

being a scientist, I would do that.

57:56

I'm actually really, really smart, and do you know what?

57:59

That is one thing that...

57:59

surprises people

58:00

about me because I'm a walking

58:03

contradiction, right? I look how

58:05

I look and people immediately underestimate

58:07

me. But I can literally talk about anything.

58:11

And, you know, I take interest

58:14

in political things and what's the

58:16

future of the economy

58:18

and things like that. And

58:21

yeah, it's just it's crazy how people

58:23

judge me based upon how I look. And

58:26

actually, that's probably one reason why

58:28

people continue to subscribe, because

58:30

I'm

58:30

actually a really good conversationist. I can

58:33

have a good conversation. You know, I'm not

58:35

you're sort of like,

58:37

how come unsubscribe

58:39

and yeah, keep it kind. Yeah.

58:42

So I just try and do my best really with

58:44

every single person. What do you think?

58:46

If you are playing minister, what things would

58:48

you change?

58:49

I

58:51

would start to tax

58:54

the wealth of super wealthy

58:57

rich

58:57

people. But they

58:59

don't. They keep on money. It's the peasants. What is it?

59:01

Fucking people. It's

59:04

something's got to change because society

59:06

is on target to collapse in 2040.

59:09

There's more going to be more and more and more older

59:11

people on this planet and not

59:13

enough younger people to pay the tax.

59:16

It's simple fact. It's

59:18

unsustainable how it currently is. So

59:20

now I'm just trying to earn as much

59:22

money as I can quickly. I

59:25

don't know how long this only fans thing will last.

59:27

Is it a trend? Is it a fad? Will

59:29

it die out like social media does? One

59:32

thing's in fashion one year and the next

59:34

it goes. So I don't know how long this is. This

59:36

is sustainable.

59:39

But you'd mind that definitely

59:42

that they could just pull the plug on it. And then what? 100 percent.

59:45

That's the last one of it anyway.

59:46

Look at what only fans did last

59:48

year. They went to ban

59:51

any nudity, any

59:53

adult content. Yeah, what was

59:55

that about? Who knows what that was about.

59:58

It was a bad PR decision.

59:59

it looks like they were trying to list

1:00:02

it on the stock exchange,

1:00:04

which is probably why they were setting up

1:00:06

to be like a non-adult platform.

1:00:09

Because again, the system

1:00:11

is rigged. So, you know, the fact that women

1:00:14

are earning a lot of money from doing adult content

1:00:16

now, the powers that be do

1:00:18

not like that. So, look, it's

1:00:21

so old fashioned how things work

1:00:23

still today.

1:00:24

How many people are on all my funds and

1:00:26

the UK? Creators. I

1:00:29

don't know how many creators in the UK, I think

1:00:31

how many creators are on the platform is

1:00:33

something like, not as much as you think,

1:00:35

probably like 1.5 million globally,

1:00:38

I think it is.

1:00:39

So a lot of fucking dongos, but I'm not getting used

1:00:42

to it when you think about it as well. Globally?

1:00:45

Like a million and a half when you think about it, it's eight

1:00:48

million people on the planet. How

1:00:51

many of those are successful though?

1:00:52

Not many. That's why

1:00:54

when you're on OnlyFans, it tells you what

1:00:56

percentage you are on the site.

1:00:59

Percent, 0.1? Zero point

1:01:03

what, I don't know what I am actually, 0.15.

1:01:07

Who's the biggest donor on it? Biggest

1:01:09

donor on the platform, celebrities.

1:01:12

Celebrities are because, you know, if you've

1:01:14

got, I don't know, 10 million

1:01:16

followers,

1:01:17

and you even make 1% of that, you're laughing. What

1:01:22

about Steven Bearstoff, have you been following that?

1:01:24

Who? Steven Bear, how about so these... Oh,

1:01:27

Steven Bear! Fucking twitters,

1:01:29

shagging his missus and... Yeah. He just

1:01:31

got done there for the thing we judge here. Yeah.

1:01:34

But that's wrong, man, it's

1:01:35

so many. That's so wrong, yeah. Revenge

1:01:37

porn. Look, there's always

1:01:39

going to be somebody who's trying to bring you down.

1:01:42

It happens to all of us, you know, people try

1:01:44

and rip content off your site

1:01:46

and stuff. How

1:01:46

do they do that? So somebody's filming you and you're doing

1:01:49

a FaceTime, can they

1:01:50

record that? And then put it wherever they want.

1:01:52

So, do you know what

1:01:55

people don't record the video calls,

1:01:57

because obviously you then know who it is.

1:01:59

It's more of a they rip

1:02:02

your content, repost your images,

1:02:04

that are behind the paywall, that kind of thing. And

1:02:07

that is something that infuriates

1:02:10

me. Cause the world is such

1:02:12

an unfair place, you know, the law is

1:02:14

not there to sort of

1:02:17

ensure the security of sex workers.

1:02:20

Like no one gives a fuck about sex workers.

1:02:23

Do you have stalkers? Stalkers,

1:02:26

I have had stalkers. How

1:02:29

do you deal with them? I

1:02:31

had one guy that actually ended

1:02:34

up coming and knocking on my door.

1:02:36

And I was like, dude, you need to leave

1:02:38

right now. Had one guy

1:02:40

do a drive by. I've had

1:02:44

an ex-sex boyfriend

1:02:46

stalk me at my house. Yeah,

1:02:49

yeah. How do I deal with them? I

1:02:52

note it. I mean, there's not much you can

1:02:55

do. The police are,

1:02:57

as we know, the police. They're not that

1:02:59

great. So

1:03:01

yeah, what can you do until

1:03:03

there's a hand around your neck strangling

1:03:05

you? No, no, no. I hope they'll be

1:03:07

there really.

1:03:08

You must have seen some funny shit, man,

1:03:10

doing that stuff. What's the funniest stuff you've seen?

1:03:13

Funniest shit I've seen. Do

1:03:16

you know what? I've written down like on my phone,

1:03:18

all the weirdest things that I've seen

1:03:20

or had. It's over there.

1:03:22

You have to pass it to me. Yeah,

1:03:31

you must have seen some fucking mad shit, man.

1:03:33

Like, people are genuinely weird. That

1:03:36

makes me question society as well. Everybody's

1:03:40

got their weird faces, it's just, I get it. But

1:03:42

when people can go to stay with me, because

1:03:45

I've interviewed so many people, I think, nah. And

1:03:48

then you realise, once you start hearing more

1:03:51

stories, you think, fuck me, look, the world's

1:03:53

mad out there. The world is completely different. The

1:03:56

world is completely

1:03:57

mad. That's

1:04:00

the scary thing. Let's

1:04:02

find the list

1:04:05

of my stories that I wrote

1:04:07

down. There's

1:04:09

so much on there.

1:04:12

What, you write all the stories, all your mad stories

1:04:14

down? Yeah, of just what

1:04:16

people have said to me or like the scenario

1:04:19

that they've called in. So

1:04:21

I've had somebody. So

1:04:24

someone said I have a fetish for toenails.

1:04:27

I've had another

1:04:30

regular camera who comes on

1:04:32

and basically pretends to

1:04:34

be somebody from the council.

1:04:36

And like, oh, I

1:04:38

have to come into your house and you have to pretend to

1:04:41

meet me. But he's the councilman

1:04:44

and

1:04:47

a guy called Jack Sparrow comes

1:04:50

in and he only talked to me in pirate

1:04:52

puns. Anything he said

1:04:54

was a pirate pun.

1:05:00

A guy who called up before

1:05:02

and all he did was

1:05:05

kept saying toes.

1:05:07

Like, and kept saying to me, keep saying toes,

1:05:09

toes, toes, toes, toes.

1:05:13

What's the one thing that

1:05:15

you never thought was possible,

1:05:17

but it's quite a common fetish? The

1:05:20

feet thing I get now because there ain't

1:05:22

a lot of it. You see that now. I see a lot

1:05:24

of girls who post and people

1:05:26

send them money to send pictures. I feel that for me,

1:05:28

it's not really for call. Do you know what I

1:05:30

mean? But what's the one thing that you see now

1:05:33

that

1:05:34

is kind of common and you think?

1:05:36

Definitely feet. Definitely

1:05:39

feet. Feet is a big one for people,

1:05:41

actually, because

1:05:43

I think the, you

1:05:46

know, the thing in society with

1:05:48

men being big, strong men and women

1:05:51

being sort of like subservient creatures,

1:05:53

that men like to flip it when they serve

1:05:56

you. And it's very much about

1:05:58

worshipping the woman.

1:05:59

and all of that. Would

1:06:02

you think, you see when they think about these fantasies

1:06:06

and bring them to life, that as

1:06:09

part of them really that individual that they

1:06:11

want to be 24-7 though? Do

1:06:13

you know what I mean? Like, want women to dominate men

1:06:16

and fucking shows your feet

1:06:18

and like, do you think that's them? Like

1:06:20

some of these guys are top fucking judges and QCs

1:06:24

and it's mad to think that they're giving

1:06:26

people sentences but yet they're having a wank or somebody's

1:06:29

feet and like, ain't

1:06:31

it mad though that now that

1:06:33

you're in that life, you probably need to

1:06:35

go back to your fucking counselor.

1:06:37

Do you know what? Having

1:06:40

said that, I am actually going to, but no,

1:06:43

yeah, I find it fascinating actually

1:06:46

because you find out somebody's deepest,

1:06:48

darkest, deepest, darkest secret

1:06:51

that nobody else knows. So

1:06:53

it's quite fascinating what people are into,

1:06:55

what triggers that fetish button

1:06:58

for them because everybody has something,

1:07:00

right? I think it's

1:07:02

pretty weird that I like looking like a

1:07:04

walking, talking sex doll. That

1:07:07

is

1:07:07

pretty weird. It's

1:07:10

a big, big tits and blood. It's

1:07:12

not that weird as well, do you know what I mean? Somebody wanting

1:07:14

to have a wank over looking at their feet's weird.

1:07:17

Do you know what I

1:07:19

mean? I don't even know when people,

1:07:22

they're trying to steal your content. Some of these

1:07:24

men on these, imagine somebody was recording

1:07:26

every one of them. That's

1:07:28

fucked.

1:07:30

Imagine they all getting exposed. If

1:07:34

we all get the banger out and just having a wank, we shut

1:07:36

as a wank, that sort of shit. Do

1:07:39

you ever get turned on by it or has it just become a

1:07:41

job?

1:07:42

Yeah, I definitely do. I'm

1:07:44

a very sexual person anyway. So

1:07:47

of course I do, definitely do. If

1:07:49

it's something that is a mutual feeling

1:07:52

of chemistry and I'm enjoying

1:07:55

it as well, then yeah, of course,

1:07:57

absolutely. Plus, I like it.

1:07:59

I like to learn about

1:08:02

other people's fetishes and it's

1:08:04

fascinating, really, really enjoy it.

1:08:06

What's your fetishes? My

1:08:08

fetishes are just

1:08:11

mainly like, obviously I really like

1:08:13

XL implants, fake lips.

1:08:16

I like a guy to be very

1:08:18

controlling, only

1:08:21

in the bedroom, not outside

1:08:23

of that. But

1:08:25

yeah, that's really me. But look,

1:08:28

I'm very open-minded, so

1:08:30

I'm a people pleaser if you like it,

1:08:33

or really like it if I like you.

1:08:36

It's really fucking gated to fall

1:08:39

in love with something you'll do as a priest, basically,

1:08:41

can't nothing. Well, the kind- That's

1:08:43

not the guy's fucking wish.

1:08:45

So I really want a guy in

1:08:47

my life that is really into the

1:08:50

whole bimbo-fication, dolification

1:08:52

as much as I am. Because it is

1:08:54

such a big part of my life that not everybody

1:08:56

likes this look, it is a lot.

1:08:59

Especially when you're out and about in public,

1:09:02

you're going to a

1:09:02

restaurant or bar or whatever. So

1:09:05

it is a lot, people stare constantly,

1:09:07

eyes are on me. Even if

1:09:09

I'm wearing like a huge baggy jumper, I

1:09:12

cannot hide. And

1:09:15

honestly, people stop, stare,

1:09:17

point,

1:09:19

it's constant, constant,

1:09:21

constant tension. And I'm not even

1:09:23

looking for it. But you're going to get

1:09:25

it even now when I'm on this, you're

1:09:28

trying not to look down. You know what I

1:09:30

mean? Like it's just as men, it's

1:09:32

the natural instinct as well. You see something there with big

1:09:34

feet, you go all the size of that kind of feet. So

1:09:37

you see I say, I just walk down man and people,

1:09:40

like I said, it's natural, you get women

1:09:42

looking as well. No doubt.

1:09:43

Yeah, yeah, women look as well.

1:09:45

I mean, I remember when I was with my friend on

1:09:48

holiday last year and we

1:09:50

were getting on this plane and this

1:09:52

woman was in a trance looking

1:09:54

at me. I would not

1:09:56

break her stare until I was sort

1:09:58

of like, hello.

1:09:59

And this is the thing, you know, it's kind

1:10:02

of the same thing if you have a facial disfigurement

1:10:04

or you're disabled or something like that.

1:10:07

It's how people stare at you like you're

1:10:09

not actually really a human

1:10:11

being. So that's

1:10:14

really hard because imagine having all

1:10:16

eyes on you all the time. That's

1:10:18

going to make you anxious at the best of times for most

1:10:21

people. But people really are looking

1:10:23

at me, you know, even if I'm covered

1:10:25

up in jacket and whatever,

1:10:28

it's it is constant.

1:10:29

How do people treat you now outside?

1:10:32

Do you think you're an easier target because of what you

1:10:34

do? Yeah,

1:10:36

I think people instantly

1:10:39

look at me and think porn star, definitely.

1:10:42

And they have

1:10:44

their assumptions because

1:10:47

of that. They probably think I'm a dumb f**k.

1:10:49

Would you ever do porn? Yes, yeah.

1:10:53

I would love to do it. I'm going to be

1:10:55

honest with you, I can see you f**king doing everything this

1:10:57

year, next year, the year after.

1:11:01

You came here with good intentions, trying to play it calm

1:11:03

and say you're going to make this and that, but

1:11:06

you're going to be doing all that. Absolute filth.

1:11:08

Yeah, it's just because you've

1:11:12

already got the dollar signs there, you see what can be

1:11:14

done. And it's once you go down that, once

1:11:16

you jump on that ship,

1:11:18

you ain't f**king going back. I've been waving

1:11:20

you dressed as Jack's barrel saying, see

1:11:23

you later. Where

1:11:25

do you go forward for the future then? Like if you're making donuts

1:11:27

and you're saying you do porn, you're saying you do all that

1:11:29

stuff, like,

1:11:31

where do you go then? Like, I know you've got

1:11:33

a figure on your head, but

1:11:34

let's be honest, as soon as we get that figure, that's not enough.

1:11:38

I think you're going, you'll be going

1:11:40

so far. Do you think you have America as

1:11:42

well? That's

1:11:43

what the money is now.

1:11:44

Yeah, the money is big. I have

1:11:46

most of my customers are American actually.

1:11:53

It's a very American look actually,

1:11:55

if you think about it, everything is bigger

1:11:57

in America. So, yeah.

1:11:59

it's very American and they love me.

1:12:02

I actually have never been to America

1:12:04

so this year I want to go and kind of try

1:12:06

and break America because

1:12:09

once you've got that down you're sorted so that's

1:12:12

definitely on the cards but in the future

1:12:14

what do I want out of life? I just

1:12:17

want to so at the moment I have like

1:12:19

a little one-bed house and

1:12:21

I'm just desperate to get like

1:12:23

a huge dream house. I've literally

1:12:25

dreamt about it since I was seven

1:12:27

years old

1:12:30

because you know as I said earlier

1:12:32

my family never had any money. We had

1:12:35

to move out of our house in 2008 because of the crash. Parents

1:12:37

couldn't pay

1:12:39

the mortgage and stuff so I've

1:12:42

always just wanted that dream house.

1:12:44

I've had friends that have had it all

1:12:46

and I just want to say like look at

1:12:48

what I've done. I've done that completely

1:12:51

single-handedly not once has anybody ever

1:12:53

given me a penny other than my subscribers

1:12:55

and you know no

1:12:58

one's taught me how to do this. This

1:13:00

is a

1:13:00

business that is turning over

1:13:02

like a lot of money and

1:13:06

not once has anybody really ever told me

1:13:08

how to do any of this so

1:13:10

I

1:13:11

think that warrants a pat on the

1:13:13

bag but like I say it's

1:13:15

not the type of job that people are like well

1:13:18

done for shoving a dildo

1:13:20

yeah but you're going to get people like that. My

1:13:22

job is to interview people and get an understanding of the

1:13:25

person. It's without passing judgment. I don't

1:13:27

give a fuck what anybody does as long as

1:13:29

they're not harming kids or themselves basically.

1:13:32

Some people agree with it, some people don't but you

1:13:34

get your biggest haters with men. Like

1:13:36

every time I post a photo at a porn star only

1:13:38

fans it's like this and that. 99% of

1:13:41

these parents are the ones paying. Do you know what I mean?

1:13:44

Look why do you think the Americans accept

1:13:46

people

1:13:47

but yet the UK don't let us fuck up?

1:13:49

So this is I've

1:13:52

spoken about this for a while because

1:13:54

the culture of Americans is

1:13:56

very supportive of one another you know

1:13:58

like go chair.

1:13:59

go. And in Britain,

1:14:02

we hate anybody that is doing

1:14:04

well. It's like, fuck John, look at

1:14:07

him in his Louis Vuitton, look

1:14:09

at him in his Porsche. We

1:14:11

have a mentality of, especially in our

1:14:14

main media, of bringing

1:14:16

people down that are doing well.

1:14:18

It's people seek it out. They want

1:14:21

to literally destroy you because

1:14:24

it's jealousy. We are so unhappy

1:14:27

in this country, so chronically

1:14:29

unhappy. And people

1:14:32

have filed because of it, because it literally

1:14:34

comes down to jealousy. Even I've noticed

1:14:37

it's not even necessarily about money. People

1:14:40

want attention because so

1:14:42

many people feel irrelevant,

1:14:44

like they're nothing in life. And

1:14:46

they just want attention and notoriety

1:14:49

and clout. Probably

1:14:51

because their mums didn't love them. And

1:14:54

that's not our problem. People

1:14:57

need to seek therapy,

1:14:59

a lot of people. And they just feel like

1:15:02

they've amounted to nothing in essence,

1:15:04

which probably isn't true. But

1:15:06

it's how they perceive themselves. Again,

1:15:08

it comes down to who do they want

1:15:10

to be? Every business

1:15:13

has a mission statement. What

1:15:15

do you want to be known for? Who are

1:15:17

you? What do you stand for? And

1:15:20

this is what we don't teach people,

1:15:22

especially children.

1:15:24

They're so lost at the moment. But this is

1:15:26

why people are full of hating rages because they're not

1:15:28

fulfilling their potential. They know they've been side they

1:15:30

should be doing more than that. It's

1:15:33

been through UKs, it's alcohol,

1:15:35

drugs, gambling, sex. People

1:15:37

are just so caught up in their life for pain. And

1:15:41

in that loop, they can't get out because

1:15:43

it's fucking hard. The longer you do it,

1:15:45

the harder it is obviously. But

1:15:47

the beautiful thing about it, man, you can make the changes.

1:15:50

You can make the sacrifices to go and try and

1:15:52

do something better. It's just

1:15:54

hard when you fucking look at people and they're

1:15:56

struggling and moaning and thinking, you're a grown ass man.

1:15:59

Stop being a little fucking... bitch do something about

1:16:01

it like that. It's well your

1:16:03

kids turn into a fucking landfill

1:16:05

of cowards man, me and female

1:16:07

everybody's just mourning and complaining about

1:16:10

fuck all that do something don't

1:16:12

need anyone about politics or your shitty job or whatever

1:16:14

do something about it. That's

1:16:17

why I always say it's easy to be successful now because everybody's

1:16:19

weak.

1:16:19

Yeah I have to say and it's one

1:16:21

of those things that you only

1:16:24

change in your life when

1:16:26

you've been through something terrible and you're forced

1:16:28

to change that is the only time

1:16:31

that people make moves and

1:16:34

most people are lazy and have

1:16:36

responsibility they might be very stressed

1:16:38

have kids you know responsibility

1:16:41

weighs people down and it it is

1:16:43

hard to get going and off the ground

1:16:45

but a lot of it

1:16:47

I feel actually comes down to working

1:16:49

for yourself. You have to have

1:16:52

your own business or your own venture or

1:16:54

whatever it be or be creative in

1:16:56

any way possible because that's the only

1:16:59

way if you just have control

1:17:01

over your own earning and

1:17:03

how you earn it you know this

1:17:05

there's so much potential

1:17:08

if you limit yourself with renting

1:17:10

your body out to your boss for a

1:17:12

month for two and a half grand for

1:17:15

five days a week for eight hours eight

1:17:17

and a half hours

1:17:20

I mean you're never going to be

1:17:23

what you want to be because they control you and

1:17:25

this is the crazy thing

1:17:27

actually that I think people critique a lot

1:17:29

of

1:17:30

sex work for for

1:17:33

what we do but I your boss

1:17:35

is fucking you every month for two and a half

1:17:38

grand you're on a fucking leash to your boss don't

1:17:41

tell me you're not because you are you

1:17:43

can't go up to him and saying what you really believe or

1:17:46

what you really want to do it's all

1:17:48

in a politics of working for your office

1:17:50

or your you know the company that you work for

1:17:53

you can't be who you want to be and it's

1:17:55

like you're critiquing us for

1:17:58

you know getting our tits out and going getting paid,

1:18:00

but your boss is literally fucking you for two

1:18:02

and a half grand

1:18:03

every month. Yep. This is everybody's

1:18:05

getting shafted that when I had Andrew

1:18:07

too. And I was asking about, um,

1:18:10

what, what's a good pimp and a bad pimp? He

1:18:12

says, I don't even call myself a pimp because the real

1:18:14

pimp's are the big corporations. The

1:18:17

people was working in Starbucks and McDonald's making

1:18:19

them fucking billions, but yet they're getting

1:18:22

paid 10 quid an hour. The

1:18:24

other ones, the big corporations are the pimps,

1:18:26

the real pimps who's just pumping

1:18:28

out every fucking person for a cheap

1:18:31

fucking wage. And I get it was people

1:18:33

are out there trying to survive. I get it, but

1:18:35

you can have more. You can go and get more. You

1:18:38

don't have to be caught up in some deals and

1:18:40

make name money, making

1:18:42

your business drive. Yes, you've got to put your foot in

1:18:44

the door and learn an income and

1:18:46

whatever, but you don't have to settle that.

1:18:48

And that's the thing about humans. We can make

1:18:51

choices. We can make better choices. The

1:18:53

majority of people tend to make sure your choices,

1:18:56

the environment they were in that if

1:18:58

you ever thought about quitting because of the pressure

1:19:01

from the outside noise,

1:19:02

um,

1:19:04

no, cause I actually really enjoy

1:19:06

what I do. I love speaking to people.

1:19:09

I love meeting people. I love

1:19:11

the craziness of it. The personal

1:19:13

sort of it. I love it. I do

1:19:15

really enjoy it because it's an insight into

1:19:18

the psychology of the public, um,

1:19:20

and the inner workings of people. And I

1:19:22

just really enjoy it. But do you want to,

1:19:25

what, what can I quit it for? Yeah,

1:19:27

I could quit it for something less

1:19:29

money. Um, I could do,

1:19:31

but no, I think my

1:19:34

plan is that I want to have

1:19:37

my own modeling agency and basically

1:19:40

take women men on and manage

1:19:43

their own new fans and show them how

1:19:45

to run a business really and

1:19:47

build a brand. And

1:19:49

that's, I feel will give me something

1:19:52

back in terms of helping

1:19:54

other people. Cause you know,

1:19:56

if I can literally go out tomorrow

1:19:59

and scout someone on the street.

1:19:59

and be like, I can literally make you,

1:20:02

you know, 10 grand a month.

1:20:04

I know I can. I've done it for myself

1:20:06

single-handedly. I know the algorithms,

1:20:09

I know what works, what doesn't work. And

1:20:11

yeah, so I think that's

1:20:14

what I'd like to do is help

1:20:16

people make money and make money off

1:20:18

them

1:20:18

making money. What's your daily routine like

1:20:21

being an only fan girl? At

1:20:23

home, most days, if

1:20:26

not all days, making content,

1:20:29

filming, going live,

1:20:33

Instagram posts, Twitter posts,

1:20:35

TikTok posts, Twitch,

1:20:39

it's a constant

1:20:41

plan. Why if not get something? Do

1:20:43

you know that for you?

1:20:44

I have now. I have a digital marketing

1:20:47

guy that's helping me because we need

1:20:49

to work smarter, not harder. So

1:20:51

I do now finally, because I realised I

1:20:53

can't do it all on my own single-handedly.

1:20:55

To get to the next step, you do need help

1:20:58

and you need advice and expertise. So

1:21:01

now I do have somebody helping me.

1:21:04

Yeah, every day is, you know, the

1:21:07

need to go on social media and

1:21:09

force myself to perform online

1:21:11

and stream and take abuse

1:21:14

or criticism. You know, it's I'm

1:21:17

not saying it's SAS training,

1:21:20

but it's grueling. It's hard. It's tough

1:21:22

to be strong every day,

1:21:24

mentally strong. I don't think

1:21:27

half the people, you know, watching this

1:21:29

podcast could put themselves out there

1:21:31

like people do if you are

1:21:33

a creator. It's very, very difficult.

1:21:36

You know, I'm showing my entire

1:21:38

body online and

1:21:40

that's open to criticism constantly.

1:21:43

You're fucking next level. I've done a podcast

1:21:45

with Katie Hopkins here and I post out

1:21:47

people saying I'm unfollowing this and that. Shut

1:21:50

up, you fucking idiot. I genuinely am

1:21:52

at the stage. I don't fucking care. I genuinely

1:21:55

don't. It took me probably four

1:21:57

years doing this to realise I genuinely don't

1:21:59

give a fuck.

1:21:59

I used to think about it and I go, ah, is

1:22:02

he serious? What does that mean? And

1:22:04

I used to think about it. No, I just I don't

1:22:06

give a fuck.

1:22:07

I just really believe in the freedom

1:22:09

of speech. Even if I disagree

1:22:11

with somebody, I think they have the right

1:22:14

to have freedom of speech. That

1:22:16

is why actually Andrew Tate is an interesting

1:22:18

character, because I don't feel

1:22:20

like he should be deplatformed. I

1:22:23

don't agree with everything he says. You know, women,

1:22:25

that topic is a very difficult

1:22:29

topic with Andrew Tate. But, you know, I

1:22:31

agree with him what he says about the world, how

1:22:34

money is, who's in power

1:22:36

and how things

1:22:37

work. He's 110 percent accurate. And

1:22:40

actually, it's weird because once you come

1:22:42

out of working for a company

1:22:45

and the corporate world and you work for yourself,

1:22:48

it's literally like an awakening, like

1:22:50

a spiritual awakening. You realize

1:22:53

how much of what you're fed is complete

1:22:55

bullshit. The same with schooling.

1:22:58

Kids are literally being taught nothing

1:23:01

of what they need to know. And it is

1:23:03

the big corporations that are at fault

1:23:05

here. It absolutely is. Look at Shell.

1:23:08

They're announcing billions

1:23:10

and billions of profit. And

1:23:12

where do they think? Who is that coming from?

1:23:14

It's coming from you and I. OK, and they're paying

1:23:17

no tax. Nothing.

1:23:20

And yet people who earn well today,

1:23:24

you know, if you're earning over

1:23:26

what is it in the UK, 50 grand a year, you

1:23:28

pay 40 percent tax

1:23:30

on that. And then if you earn even more,

1:23:33

you pay even more. The effective tax

1:23:35

rate is actually 62 percent. But that

1:23:37

is a fuck of a lot to take from somebody.

1:23:40

And the problem is not in

1:23:43

people earning a lot of money because

1:23:45

you will be paying tax on that. It's

1:23:47

the people that own assets. And

1:23:50

if I was the prime minister, you asked me earlier, things

1:23:53

have got to got to change

1:23:55

because it cannot carry on how it is today.

1:23:58

People can't heat their homes.

1:23:59

or eat or feed their children

1:24:02

or buy school uniform. Most people

1:24:05

receiving benefits are in work.

1:24:08

We have literally impoverished

1:24:11

our whole nation and we're bankrupting

1:24:13

our government at the same time. It's

1:24:16

unsustainable.

1:24:17

As humans, why

1:24:19

do you think we're here? That's

1:24:22

a really good question. I actually ask myself

1:24:24

that every day, so I'm really interested to know,

1:24:27

but why are humans here

1:24:29

every day and what is the meaning of

1:24:31

life? The meaning of life is

1:24:33

just to live and

1:24:35

to enjoy. Although

1:24:38

you won't enjoy life all the time, but

1:24:40

again, that is the meaning of life.

1:24:41

Do you think as a human, though, we know what

1:24:43

happiness is, we know what enjoyment is anymore

1:24:46

because we've been so conditioned for a month?

1:24:48

No. Do you know what I mean? I always say this. There's

1:24:50

never a blueprint and manual how we should be living

1:24:52

life. Should you be doing OnlyFans?

1:24:55

Should I be doing podcasts? Should we be trying

1:24:57

to build social media forums? I don't think

1:24:59

we should be. I genuinely don't. I feel as

1:25:01

if it's about a tribalism. I feel

1:25:03

as if you should have your own wee tribe and not

1:25:05

a village, but growing your own food, growing

1:25:07

your own fridge and just family-orientated

1:25:10

friends and it's your tribe. It

1:25:13

gets in there. I

1:25:15

just feel as if the world's just one

1:25:17

big stage. I feel as if it's so messed up and people

1:25:19

are so confused. It's not that people are

1:25:21

bad. It's just what they know. It's what they've been conditioned

1:25:23

to. It's what they've learnt. They've just learnt behaviours. I

1:25:26

don't have all the answers, but I'm trying to work on,

1:25:29

I'm trying to ask the right questions

1:25:31

to better moon fucking life. But I

1:25:33

genuinely, sometimes I think I've got it

1:25:36

together.

1:25:36

Other times I think you ain't got to fucking clue

1:25:38

me. That is the capitalist society,

1:25:41

though. That is what we're born into, to

1:25:43

believe that you need to get a

1:25:45

job, to buy a house, to

1:25:47

get... And you're not even buying a house. You're

1:25:49

buying debt to get a house.

1:25:52

Like, this is what people don't understand. Everything...

1:25:55

It's actually crazy

1:25:58

how different it is between the house.

1:25:59

have's and have nots, right? Because if

1:26:02

you don't know someone who owns a supermarket,

1:26:05

it doesn't mean that that doesn't exist. Everything

1:26:08

is owned that you see, right?

1:26:10

So the shops, the land,

1:26:13

the house that you're, you know, sits

1:26:15

on sometimes if it's not freehold. It's

1:26:18

like, there's so many people who are

1:26:20

super wealthy. If you don't, if

1:26:22

you don't own your house, somebody

1:26:25

has debt that they've lent you to get

1:26:27

that house. And that is the problem.

1:26:30

That's why we're all driven to think that

1:26:32

we need to buy things to

1:26:34

be happy because otherwise it

1:26:36

wouldn't serve the powers that be

1:26:39

if we were all spiritual and living off

1:26:41

the land and being community, you

1:26:44

know, led in tribes,

1:26:46

which actually is the meaning of life. It's

1:26:48

each other. It's being human.

1:26:51

And this is the interesting thing

1:26:54

because if we, if we

1:26:56

continue on this trajectory of where

1:26:58

we're going, if you lose

1:27:01

what it is to be human, we're

1:27:04

done. That's it. Over. Those

1:27:07

are mental health, no? Yeah,

1:27:11

it's good. Mental health

1:27:13

is good, but I struggle.

1:27:15

I struggle every day because