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for everyone. We're gonna get

0:32

into this. Hi, friends. This week, I

0:35

need to reality check you about your

0:37

attention and your focus because your attention

0:39

and your focus is what makes people

0:41

special. So if you have someone in

0:43

your life that you are just fixated

0:45

on, cannot get your attention off of,

0:48

I'm gonna tell you everything you need to

0:50

know, one, about your attention, and two, how

0:53

to let them go, whether it's a relationship

0:55

or a friendship or anything, and also just

0:57

a general understanding about how powerful your focus

0:59

is. Because your attention is

1:02

what makes people special or not.

1:04

I really need you to understand

1:06

how powerful your focus and attention

1:08

is. Where you

1:10

place it is gonna dictate

1:12

and determine a lot. When you put it

1:14

on yourself, you know things get

1:17

better. You listen to this podcast. You

1:19

already got that down. But I need

1:21

you to understand your attention and focus

1:23

is very powerful. And when you put

1:25

it on someone, you can convince yourself

1:27

of anything. Your brain can make anything

1:30

or anyone special. And most of the

1:32

times, you make people more special than

1:34

they actually are. You can literally convince

1:37

yourself a peanut on the ground is

1:39

special. You can convince yourself through psychology

1:41

and just like delusions in your own

1:43

brain that something is special or is

1:46

more special than it really is. You

1:48

can make yourself imagine this little peanut

1:50

on the floor. If you decide to

1:53

make that special, you can. When you're

1:55

very, very aware and you

1:57

have the gift that all of us have

1:59

which is awareness. It's a gift and a

2:01

curse, but you become very very convincing. You

2:04

can see all the different angles

2:06

and aspects of things that most people can't

2:08

and you and your brain can kind of

2:10

do this dirty little dance where you fill

2:12

in voids and make things more special than

2:14

they are and you convince yourself of it

2:16

and you get trapped in it and so

2:18

much more of this is in your own

2:20

head than you even realize. So I want

2:22

to teach you how to crack this and

2:25

I have to break your heart a little

2:27

bit. Like this is a very heartbreaking thing

2:30

to do is face the reality of

2:32

things and to understand the power of

2:34

your focus and your attention and you

2:36

have to be very selective with what

2:38

you give it to. You can run

2:40

yourself stupid and get yourself overly attached

2:42

to things if you do not watch

2:44

your ass. So like I said,

2:46

you can literally take a peanut on the

2:48

ground and convince yourself it is the

2:50

most special thing in the world and you can fully

2:52

make yourself believe it. And I say that again because

2:55

I just want you to get it. You know what

2:57

I mean and I have to use the peanut example

2:59

and I might use it a few more times

3:01

throughout this episode. But with people, we're

3:03

going to get a little spiritual. Your

3:05

attention and your focus is the

3:08

only thing that keeps them alive.

3:10

And what I mean by alive is

3:12

existing in your current reality. People and

3:14

things will cease to exist in your

3:17

experience in this life as soon as

3:19

you take your focus off of them.

3:21

There's a lot of fear and crazy

3:23

shit in that because like I said,

3:25

if you take your focus off of

3:27

it, it dies. It's like when you're

3:29

a child, when you have your parent

3:31

walk out of the room, you don't

3:34

have any certainty. They're going to come

3:36

back. Your brain will convince you you

3:38

just lost this person forever. And then

3:40

you learn the habit and the routine of

3:42

when the parent goes out of the room and

3:44

then comes back. You understand that

3:46

they're coming back and you can fill in

3:49

that void and give yourself that reassurance. And

3:51

another example is the dark. People are not

3:53

scared of the dark and the unknown. You're

3:55

scared of what you think is in it.

3:57

So like if you put someone in a.

4:00

dark room by themselves. Your brain is

4:02

going to start automatically thinking of like

4:04

scary ghosts and scary demons and shit

4:06

that could be in the corner of

4:08

the room. The dark itself is not

4:10

scary. It is what you think

4:12

is in there. Your brain can trap you

4:14

in a false reality. If you start to

4:16

think there's a demon in the room, you're

4:18

going to start seeing a little random shadow

4:20

or you might see a figure or your

4:22

brain is going to start looking for proof

4:24

of that thing. Like I said with the

4:26

peanut, if you tell yourself this little peanut

4:28

is special, you will start to see proof

4:31

of that and you will start to

4:33

attract experiences into your reality

4:35

that confirm what you're telling your brain

4:37

or what your brain is telling you.

4:40

But like with the kid, when the parent

4:42

walks out of the room, before your brain

4:44

gets the ability to understand what's going on,

4:46

you will fully think that they just died.

4:48

Your focus is no longer on them. You

4:50

can no longer see them. They're no longer

4:52

in your reality, but you're sitting here thinking

4:54

about them and to a child, that person

4:56

just died. Like they're gone. They're

4:58

no longer like existing in their reality and

5:01

what thoughts they think are going to dictate

5:03

how they feel about the experience. So if

5:05

a kid is sitting here and can reassure

5:08

themselves, okay, the parent's coming back, they're going

5:10

to sit here and be chilling. The other

5:12

kid who doesn't have the ability to say,

5:14

okay, the parent's coming back has just experienced

5:17

a loss and is going to be in

5:19

a panic mode, a panic state, fight or

5:21

flight, freaking out, bugging out. The parent probably

5:24

died. They're not coming back. There's no reassurance.

5:26

There's no anything, but your brain decides

5:28

which way it's going to go, which experience

5:30

you're going to have. So you could be

5:32

sitting here being okay because you told yourself

5:34

they're coming back, or you could be bugging

5:36

the fuck out because you're like, they're never

5:38

coming back. Which one are you going to

5:40

look at? And that's what I'm saying. Your

5:42

focus is powerful and can determine how you

5:44

feel about certain things. But what I want

5:47

you to understand about your focus and attention

5:50

is people are only going to remain

5:52

alive and feel like they're in your

5:54

reality. If you're focused on them, as

5:56

soon as you take your focus off of

5:58

them, stop checking them. social media, stop

6:00

looking them up, stop thinking about them, and

6:03

stop convincing yourself that they're special. There is

6:05

gonna be a form of loss and mourning

6:07

that comes with that. There's one thing to

6:09

lose someone and there's another thing to mentally

6:11

let them go. I'm gonna do a whole

6:13

podcast episode about how to let someone go.

6:16

This is just to make you understand the

6:18

power of your attention and focus. When you

6:20

keep thinking of this person, looking them up

6:22

and trying to hold on to anything to

6:24

keep them into your reality, that focus is

6:26

what you're gonna see proof of. You're gonna

6:29

see how you're still falsely connected, but

6:31

like I said when you remove that

6:33

focus, you're gonna feel that panic and

6:35

the fear and the loss of them

6:37

because your focus is what keeps them

6:39

alive. If you don't think of them,

6:41

if you aren't looking them up, if

6:43

you aren't seeing how they still exist,

6:45

they do cease to exist in your

6:47

reality. They're not actually dead, but for

6:49

your experience and your perspective, they're gone.

6:52

And one more point I want to throw at

6:54

you about attention and focus so you see how

6:57

powerful it is. If you think about

6:59

celebrities online and influencers and a lot

7:01

of these fucking weirdos, the only reason

7:04

that a lot of them are special

7:06

or seen as special is because they

7:08

have people's attention. People watch them, people

7:10

follow them. You decide with

7:13

your focus what is important and what

7:15

is not. For you to keep watching

7:17

somebody, their perceived value by others is

7:19

gonna go up because they have so

7:21

many people's focus and attention on them. And

7:23

that's gonna make other people think, just because

7:25

other people's attention is on them, it's gonna

7:27

make other people think, oh they are important,

7:29

they are special, they have all these followers,

7:31

they have 100 million followers, like oh my

7:33

god they must be special. If

7:36

you look at these celebrities and people that

7:38

society makes famous now, if

7:40

you take away the fact that

7:42

so many people watch them, what

7:44

value do they actually have? A

7:47

lot of them, it's fucking none.

7:49

They're all useless and fucking boring.

7:51

No substance, no personality. Most of

7:54

them are contributing shit to shit.

7:56

Like they're just online and they

7:58

have followers so... It gives everyone

8:00

a false sense that they're important when they're

8:02

not. They don't actually have any value. But

8:05

do you see what I'm saying with the

8:07

connection of people's attention makes you perceive that

8:09

there's value there. When you take

8:11

that attention off and you look at what

8:13

they just are, you see there's

8:15

no real value. Like there's so many influencers, we

8:18

all look at them and we're like, why the

8:20

fuck are you popular? Why the

8:22

fuck are you famous? You're nobody. I hate

8:24

that that sounds so rough and rude. We

8:26

all think it, but I just want you

8:28

to see the power in attention and

8:30

focus on things. But with social media

8:32

now, the way that things

8:34

are monetized is attention. So people have

8:37

been able to make careers and profit

8:39

and make money off of the attention

8:41

that they garner. So that's a separate

8:43

conversation. But what I want you to

8:45

see here is just people's attention being

8:47

on something makes it valuable.

8:50

There doesn't even have to actually be

8:52

value there. Just enough people's attention on

8:54

it can make it valuable. The same

8:56

thing goes with you. You

8:59

guys are all the people who give

9:01

your attention to certain things. You

9:03

make these things important. If you

9:05

do not lend attention to it, it

9:08

ceases to exist. It ceases to be

9:10

important. There's no attention on it. Okay.

9:13

Now I want to talk about how convincing

9:15

yourself of something can really fuck you. And

9:17

this is when you make something more special

9:19

than it is. And this is where your

9:21

attention will make something special. Your imagination is

9:23

very strong. We're also going

9:25

to talk about the potential of people and

9:27

all that in a minute. But your imagination

9:29

is strong as hell. Like I gave the

9:31

example of being in the dark. You can

9:33

scare the shit out of yourself. But

9:36

with people, the realization that hit me the

9:38

other day, you guys know that I see

9:40

visuals. I have a weird way

9:42

that awareness and perspectives come to me. I

9:45

just know shit I'm not supposed to know.

9:47

The visual I saw, it's like if you

9:49

take a box, like a cardboard box. If

9:52

you just put this box in your house,

9:54

you put it on a table and you

9:56

convince yourself there's something special

9:58

in that box. your

10:01

brain is going to hype it

10:04

up. Your brain is going to think that

10:06

this box needs to be protected. It's so

10:08

special. When you tell yourself that the unknown

10:10

of what's inside of it is special, when

10:12

you put your focus on how it is

10:14

special and convincing yourself of this imaginary narrative,

10:17

you don't fucking know what's in it. But

10:19

just by the look of the box, you

10:21

see certain things about the box. This is

10:23

going to relate to people and their appearance

10:25

and what they portray and

10:27

what you see. You can convince yourself

10:29

by the exterior of this box, oh

10:32

my god there must be something so

10:34

special in it and you

10:36

will fixate on that. Your brain will

10:38

look for all of the proof of

10:40

what's so great in this box. You're

10:42

gonna get so excited. You're gonna get

10:44

so infatuated with this fucking box because

10:46

you've convinced yourself there's something special in

10:48

it. You literally can drive yourself to

10:51

a point of madness and be doing

10:53

insane shit for what's

10:55

in this box because you just convinced

10:57

yourself there's something special in it. But

11:00

with people, the mask

11:02

always falls. A lot of

11:04

people portray that there's something special and

11:06

there's something like in the box. Like

11:08

their box is pretty. They decorated a

11:10

certain way. They try to be perceived

11:12

a certain way. But when

11:15

you fixate on the outside and convince yourself

11:17

there's something special in it, when you eventually

11:19

get the box and you get to open

11:22

it. Your brain can

11:24

make you see a false reality. If

11:26

you open this box after you've convinced

11:28

yourself it's so special. There's something so

11:30

amazing in it. I can't wait to

11:32

get it. My life will be better

11:34

once I have it. When you open

11:36

this box and you see nothing actually

11:38

in it, your

11:41

brain is not gonna accept that.

11:43

Your brain has convinced itself there's

11:45

something special in this motherfucker. It's

11:48

not gonna accept there's nothing in it.

11:51

Your brain is gonna look for proof. Your brain

11:53

is gonna be like there's something more to it.

11:55

I'm not seeing something. You're not gonna face the

11:57

reality and the truth of the situation because you

11:59

hyped it up and you put your focus

12:01

on how it's special for so long, your

12:03

brain is trained to think like that. It's

12:06

not just going to let that go or pull

12:08

that focus off and the convincing that you've done

12:10

for yourself of like having this belief of this

12:13

thing is special. You're going to look for proof

12:15

of that belief. You're going to look how, wait,

12:17

it might not be in there or it's hidden.

12:19

Let me keep looking. Or you're going to look

12:21

in there and see something and it's not as

12:24

great as you thought, but you're going to fixate

12:26

on how it's better and your focus is going

12:28

to be on how it's not actually the reality.

12:30

It's on how is it special. Like I said

12:32

with the peanut, when you open the box and

12:34

you see a fucking peanut in there, oh

12:36

my God, wait, there was something special in this

12:38

box. It's just a peanut. But

12:41

what about this peanut is so great

12:43

and your brain is going to fuck

12:45

you. It literally is going to fuck

12:47

you. And I wanted to make you

12:49

aware of this to stop you in

12:51

this process because I don't want you

12:53

to be blinded by your brain and

12:55

your own beliefs and your own thoughts

12:57

and put your focus and attention and

12:59

energy onto something that is not actually

13:01

special. You've just convinced yourself it's special.

13:03

Your attention on it made

13:05

it special. It's

13:07

not actually special. It's a fucking peanut

13:09

in the box. So I'm going

13:12

to relate this to relationships. It can also

13:14

go with friendships or any like opportunity or

13:16

experience that you're wanting. What you have to

13:18

do is get so faced

13:20

down in the reality of what's really

13:22

in this box, what this box actually

13:24

is. Okay, it was a pretty package.

13:26

There's just a fucking peanut in there.

13:29

Like I said, you're going to have

13:31

a little bit of that morning process.

13:33

The thing you thought was so special,

13:35

you have the heartbreak. It wasn't all

13:37

this excitement, all this preparation, all this

13:39

convincing yourself your life was going to

13:41

be better is destroyed. As soon as

13:43

you see the reality of it, looking

13:45

at the truth is very

13:47

hard. And I'm someone who values

13:49

the truth over the way that I feel because

13:52

I'm not going to live in a false fucking

13:54

reality. And that's why I spit the truth so

13:56

hard. And some people love it and appreciate it.

13:58

And some people fight me. because they

14:01

want comfort. They want things that

14:03

feel good and not always the

14:05

truth because the truth will literally

14:07

rip through how you feel. It's

14:09

not good or bad, it's the

14:11

truth. So when you see the

14:13

truth of your little peanut in your box

14:15

of this thing that you convince yourself but

14:17

they say so, you have a heartbreak. You're

14:19

gonna have a morning process and

14:21

it's a lot more than you realize. So I don't

14:23

want you to look at this like, oh, it's just

14:25

no big deal. I should just be over it. I

14:27

should just move on. No, babe, you've been in a

14:29

whole cycle with this fucking box. And you have so

14:31

many emotional ties to it

14:33

and so much emotional investment in it.

14:35

It's very hard to see the truth

14:38

and not stay blind to the fact

14:40

that it's a fucking peanut. Like you're

14:42

gonna wanna keep looking for how it's special

14:44

because you don't wanna give up what you've

14:46

just experienced. And you're gonna have

14:48

to also mourn how you thought your life was

14:51

gonna get better once you got this thing. When

14:53

you realize there's no thing in it and it's

14:55

just a fucking peanut, the whole desire you had,

14:57

the whole idea of what your life was gonna

14:59

be like, gone, wiped out. So like I said,

15:01

your emotions will blind you. And the

15:04

way to get into reality about someone or

15:06

a situation or an opportunity is

15:08

put their ass on paper. This

15:11

is, like I said, very hard because it's

15:13

gonna hurt when you've convinced yourself

15:16

something special and you've just looked for proof

15:18

of how it is. And

15:21

then you start looking for proof of how it's

15:23

not special and looking at the reality of it,

15:25

not even looking for proof that it's not special.

15:27

Looking at just the truth of it. A lot

15:29

of the things that you thought were special about

15:32

it or thought were true about it were just

15:34

in your head. They were just from your focus.

15:36

You were looking for just the good, just the

15:38

special, that's all you saw. Now you're gonna be

15:40

looking for the truth, the reality of it. And

15:43

the way you do it, because your emotions are not gonna

15:45

let you just like think of this. I want you

15:47

to put it on paper. Write down

15:50

the reality of the situation and everything

15:52

going on with the person or the

15:54

opportunity that you convinced yourself was

15:57

so damn special. The best question I've learned to

15:59

ask myself about people

16:02

or situations like opportunities or like

16:04

a friendship a partner if

16:07

you want to get in the square

16:09

ass reality of this box for this

16:11

situation if I were to go meet

16:13

someone new or have a new opportunity

16:16

what exact things about

16:18

this current person or

16:20

opportunity do I hope

16:23

are in my next one and

16:25

that's gonna make you pull out and

16:28

see the things that are actually special

16:30

about it and that list is gonna

16:32

be way shorter than you fucking realize

16:34

you're gonna have to face the truth

16:36

of it and that's a very fair

16:38

assessment that's how you see the truth

16:41

about what is special about this box

16:43

and the peanut inside of it what

16:45

do I hope is in the next

16:47

thing the next person the next friend

16:49

the next opportunity whatever it is you're

16:51

fixated on find the exact things

16:53

you hope are in the next one and

16:56

then look at that list you're

16:58

gonna have to prepare to crack get you a

17:00

box of tissues maybe get a little Christopher something

17:03

get a little comfort somehow maybe have someone

17:05

near you so you can go get a

17:07

hug because it's gonna break a goddamn heart

17:09

but it's gonna hurt you but

17:12

when you chase that truth it puts you

17:14

in a square reality where you're no longer

17:16

just a dumbass who is fixated on this

17:18

box that's not really special and taking all

17:21

these actions and doing all these things that

17:23

should not be taken and you're not doing

17:25

things that you should not be doing for

17:27

this thing because there's a false perceived reality

17:30

of it when you see the truth of

17:32

it your actions get a lot more in

17:34

line with what it's worth and how much

17:36

energy you should be lending to it and

17:39

if you even want to keep this fucking

17:41

box because like I said you convince

17:43

yourself it's special when you see the reality of it

17:45

you might want to withdraw all your focus and attention

17:47

from it or you might

17:49

just be in a better reality of it and be

17:51

able to kind of calm these heavy heavy emotions you

17:53

feel these like false overly

17:57

boastful emotions like you might have felt

17:59

way more more than you should

18:01

and this putting their ass on paper

18:04

will help you not feel so

18:06

emotionally invested and falsely emotionally invested if

18:08

you're gonna continue with them but it

18:10

also might make you aware of you

18:12

don't want this box you might want

18:14

a new friend you might want a

18:16

new partner you might want a new

18:18

opportunity not this one because now you

18:20

see the truth of it you've corrected

18:22

your focus you've gotten a grip on

18:25

your focus and your attention and your

18:27

emotions because your emotions can make you

18:29

blind do not let

18:31

them make you be willfully blind because

18:33

when you're over here just fixated on

18:35

this box and like I said you're

18:37

feeling more than you should you're taking

18:39

better care of it than you should

18:41

you're taking actions you shouldn't be taking

18:43

because it's not as special as you

18:46

think you're prioritizing it in a way

18:48

that you shouldn't because you're not looking

18:50

at the reality of it when you

18:52

finally wake up and see

18:54

the truth of this thing after a certain amount of

18:56

time you're gonna look back at all the effort and

18:58

energy you put into it as wasted

19:01

so that's why I'm saying

19:03

look at the truth of it before

19:05

you continue with all this emotion and

19:07

energy you're putting into this thing and

19:09

prioritization and caring about it if you

19:12

need to stop caring about somebody this

19:14

will fucking do it this

19:16

will really get you emotionally in check

19:19

and make you see the true power of your

19:21

attention and focus get it off that goddamn box

19:23

with a peanut in it another

19:25

question I like to ask myself when I'm

19:27

putting someone to paper or putting an opportunity

19:29

to paper what aspects

19:31

about this current thing do I

19:34

think I will never find again

19:36

what are the things that are

19:38

specific to this person or this

19:40

opportunity that I truly can never

19:43

get again this is another one that's

19:45

gonna make you realize what

19:47

you're worried about is most likely replaceable

19:50

and not as great as you think okay

19:52

so be careful with that but

19:55

pin to paper anything you feel

19:58

so much for pin to paper Make

20:00

sure you're in reality about it before you

20:02

treat it better than you should because like

20:04

I said when you look back You're gonna

20:06

kick yourself. Do not be willfully blind

20:09

so now I want to talk about something that's gonna

20:12

happen and what you're gonna be a Vibrational match to

20:14

when you do not look at the reality of things

20:16

and you let yourself just stay in a delusion When

20:19

you believe a certain thing, you're

20:21

just gonna be constantly looking for more proof

20:23

of it It doesn't matter how much proof

20:25

comes up in front of you that this

20:27

box is not special You're not gonna see

20:30

it. You're only looking for confirmation of what

20:32

you believe about the box. It's special So

20:34

you're just blindly looking at the couple little

20:36

crumbs and the couple little things that are

20:38

letting you believe this is still valuable It

20:41

doesn't matter how much proof comes

20:43

out. It does not matter how

20:45

much is contradicting that belief You're

20:47

not seeing it. The universe will

20:49

wake you up and it's

20:51

gonna do it in a very perspective

20:55

evoking way So

20:58

most people and one of the fastest

21:00

ways the universe will wake you the

21:02

fuck up and show you what really

21:04

matters and what's really important is an

21:06

illness and that's a

21:08

fucking scary thing to Manifest and a scary

21:10

way to be waking up by the universe

21:12

and usually it's not a little illness It's

21:15

usually a big one because like I said

21:17

the universe is gonna try and poke holes

21:19

in your argument about how special you think

21:21

This thing is it's gonna try

21:23

random fights are gonna come up random

21:26

bullshit random things are gonna get exposed

21:29

And if you continue just to ignore it and

21:31

go down the path of consider it's special. It's

21:33

what I'm not gonna let it go I can't

21:35

let it go when you fixate on it the

21:38

universe is gonna have to wake you up loud and

21:40

when it screams it's gonna come through an illness or

21:42

a Really close call

21:45

with death to

21:47

jolt you into a perspective

21:49

to question Everything

21:52

so listen and paint a paper

21:54

their ass While the universe

21:56

is being nice with you because it will

21:58

wake you the fuck up And one

22:00

of my favorite quotes about anything you've been

22:02

through in the past That

22:05

got really really bad I'm sure you can

22:07

all look back and see this quote said

22:10

if it never got as bad as it did

22:12

Would I have still waken up and

22:14

this is a situation where this shit can

22:17

happen? The universe is just gonna turn

22:19

the heat up and make things worse and worse

22:21

and more painful and more hard to deal with

22:23

And more things you just have to Close

22:25

a blind eye to to the

22:27

point where it's just gonna have to snatch your eyes

22:29

open Do not do that to

22:32

yourself No one and nothing is worth

22:34

that because your life is gonna be

22:36

on the line if you don't wake

22:38

the fuck up now I

22:40

want to talk about the potential you see in

22:42

other people and the

22:44

issue with that a lot

22:46

of times with Potential and

22:48

people falling in love with the potential

22:51

of someone Comes

22:53

down to you're seeing what you

22:55

would do if you were in

22:57

their given circumstances You're

23:00

not seeing the reality of them and the

23:02

potential you see is what you would do

23:04

in their shoes How you

23:06

would take advantage of that situation how

23:08

you would handle things how you would

23:10

improve things and you see the potential

23:12

of Them but it's

23:15

really about you. You're only

23:17

seeing how it's gonna be great. It's

23:19

gonna be good You see the potential

23:21

of what you would do in their

23:23

shoes and you think that's the only

23:25

realistic possibility There's absolutely a potential of

23:27

that But there's also a potential for

23:30

them to do what they want to fucking

23:32

do and not maximize their potential and not

23:34

handle things The way that you would handle

23:36

them There's a reality of both and

23:39

it's very hard and like I said

23:41

Heartbreaking to face that the

23:43

potential of someone that you've

23:45

convinced yourself is so great box with

23:47

a peanut is not the reality It's

23:49

just the box. You're convincing yourself with

23:51

all this and that look at what

23:53

is inside. It's a goddamn peanut. I

23:57

Love this analogy. It's so funny. Now.

23:59

I'm gonna talk about something that's a

24:01

little deeper and a lot

24:03

more fucked up with

24:05

loving someone. Sometimes you have

24:08

to see that you're

24:10

not loving someone for them.

24:13

The things that you're doing for

24:15

them and the way that you're

24:17

taking care of them and the

24:19

things you do to make them

24:21

feel special and prioritized and loved

24:24

is just satisfaction for you because

24:26

you know how special you would

24:29

feel if someone treated you the

24:31

way you treat them and

24:33

this is kind of fucked up because

24:36

you're really just loving someone

24:39

the way that you so desperately wish someone

24:41

would love you and that will have you

24:43

looking stupid as fuck. You will be doing

24:46

so much for them and doing all these

24:48

things to make them feel special and cared

24:50

about and prioritized and you're showing

24:53

them how much better their life is

24:55

now that you're in it. You're showing

24:57

them what it's like to be loved

24:59

the way that you wish someone would

25:01

love you. You are gonna

25:03

think you just want to do all

25:05

of these things for them but what

25:07

you're subconsciously doing is loving them and

25:11

trying to love yourself through it in

25:13

a weird fucked up way. You're doing

25:15

all these things for them and

25:17

you don't really know why you love

25:19

doing them. It's because you know how

25:21

special it makes them feel and how

25:24

good they feel from getting your love.

25:26

You see how of use you are.

25:28

You see how great it is because

25:31

you fucking wish someone would do it

25:33

for you. I just don't

25:35

want you to be in that delusion

25:37

of thinking you truly love someone when

25:40

there's a weird subconscious self-serving

25:42

motive behind it because when

25:44

you do this and you put

25:47

love into someone or something that's a box

25:49

with a fucking peanut in it. When you're

25:51

just trying so desperately to love them and

25:53

help them and heal them in a way

25:55

that you wish you could be healed you're

25:58

gonna feel so attached to them. and

26:00

you're gonna feel like you care about them

26:02

so much more because you're investing so much

26:04

time, effort, and energy into them. When you invest

26:06

in things, you care about them more. Why

26:09

are you caring the way that you are? Really,

26:11

like really sit there and look at it. Is

26:13

it like I just said before with like, the

26:15

whole thing of you loving them, how you wish

26:17

someone would love you because you know how happy you

26:20

would be? You know how much you would value

26:22

someone who loves the way that you do. So

26:24

when you give all this love to somebody,

26:26

all you're banking on and hoping for is

26:28

that they will value you beyond comprehension

26:30

and never risk losing you.

26:34

So you might be doing all these things

26:36

to prove your own value to yourself and

26:38

see it reflected in someone. You're not actually

26:40

doing it because you love this person. That's

26:42

a hard pill to swallow and that's a motherfucking

26:45

horse pill. But the biggest

26:47

thing I want you to see with all of

26:49

this is the more focus and attention and effort

26:51

you put into someone or something, the

26:54

less you have to put on yourself. And

26:56

a lot of the times, if you're trying to prove your

26:59

value to someone by loving them the way that you wish

27:01

you could be loved, you're robbing yourself.

27:03

You don't actually have that much energy to

27:05

give. You're having to take from yourself to

27:07

be able to love them the way you

27:09

wish you could be loved. So you're already

27:12

taking all your focus and your energy and

27:14

putting it on them and making them the

27:16

special one. That's already taken up a lot

27:18

of your energy you've already got. So

27:21

where's the extra energy to put into yourself

27:24

and to take care of yourself and to actually love

27:26

yourself? Where's all that? You

27:28

see what I mean? When you're trying

27:30

so desperately to love someone and value them

27:32

and you try and take care of this

27:34

box, you better make sure there ain't

27:37

a goddamn peanut in it. Because if you're doing all

27:39

this for a box you convinced was special and you

27:41

open it and see nothing, you

27:43

just rob yourself of all that attention, the energy

27:45

and focus you've been shoving into this box. So

27:47

get clear on it before you do that. And

27:50

be very selective and protective of your

27:52

focus, like I said, because it's powerful.

27:55

Because you're putting all this shit into other people. Imagine

27:57

you flipped it at you and you put

27:59

that effort in. and focus into you, how you'd feel.

28:01

You convinced yourself you were special and look

28:03

for the proof of that. If you spent

28:05

your energy there, things would be

28:07

a lot different. Better use of your time.

28:11

Before we keep going, we're gonna take a

28:13

second to talk about the sponsors of today's

28:15

podcast. The first one is squeeze.com. This is

28:17

my favorite company for juice cleanses. If you

28:19

are interested in trying one, this is the

28:21

place I recommend. I like to do them

28:23

anytime I feel bloated or I just wanna

28:25

reset my digestion. Like if I've been eating

28:27

off or eating bad, I'll do a

28:30

little juice cleanse to get myself back on track. But

28:32

I also like to do them when I'm sick because

28:34

it's good to take in liquid nutrients and not give

28:36

your body a lot of food and things to process.

28:38

If you can just do fruit juice or vegetable juice,

28:40

you're good to go. But squeeze.com has

28:42

two options for cleanses. They have the Squeeze

28:44

cleanse and they have the Super Squeeze. Squeezed

28:47

tastes good. They both taste good. But Squeezed

28:49

has a little bit more sugar and things

28:51

that's gonna make it taste better. Super Squeeze

28:54

is as close as you can get to

28:56

the actual real ingredients and the straight up

28:58

just pure juice. So like the Squeeze has

29:00

a little bit more sugar, but it's not

29:03

that bad at all. Like it's realistic

29:05

and it's doable. And then for both the Squeeze

29:07

and the Super Squeeze cleanses, they have a spicy

29:09

version. So if you like spicy stuff. I like

29:12

those when I'm sick because I feel like it

29:14

just like burns the cold out of me. But

29:17

these cleanses are not a laxative. So don't think you're

29:19

gonna do a juice cleanse and like shit your brains

29:21

out, you're fine. It's not like that. It's just to

29:23

help you with bloating and get your digestive track back

29:25

on track if you've messed it up. But also it's

29:27

good to give your digestive track a break for a

29:30

minute from food. Here and there it's

29:32

gonna do a cleanse. So if you're interested in

29:34

doing one, squeeze.com also has same day local

29:36

delivery. So if you wanna go buy a cleanse

29:38

and do it the same day, you can. If

29:40

you're in their specific area. But if you're not

29:43

in their local delivery range, you can still get

29:45

things ordered to you. They come with like ice

29:47

packs to keep them all fresh and cute and

29:49

they ship nationwide. But if you use code AWARE,

29:51

you'll get free shipping same day or nationwide. So

29:54

if you're interested and you wanna try out one

29:56

of the cleanses, go to squeeze.com and then use

29:58

code AWARE at checkout for free. So

30:01

for our next sponsor it's funny you got

30:03

to talk about cutting trails and there's someone

30:05

that blazed the trail. Harry's razors. They saw

30:07

people getting ripped off by the shaving industry

30:09

and products being promoted that didn't really work

30:11

so Harry's razors blazed their own trail and

30:13

they wanted to do something about it so

30:15

they made really good razors and everything you

30:17

need for shaving and I have heard about

30:19

Harry's before Harry's razors and I didn't really

30:21

get the hype until I tried them. I

30:24

like their razors a lot. The shave gel is

30:26

really good. Smells good and it like everything just

30:29

smooth when you shave. Like you shave your face

30:31

or your arms. I love to shave my

30:33

arms because it makes your muscles pop. But

30:35

a lot of my girlfriends actually use Harry's

30:37

razors too and some women use men's razors

30:39

for like down there because they're better for

30:41

preventing ingrowns. Some people say and from my

30:43

friends experiences they all like them better. But

30:45

the razors themselves are like weighted but not

30:47

too heavy. Like they're just like a good

30:49

weight and everything like glides and works good.

30:51

I don't know how to explain it but

30:53

you have to have the weight of a

30:55

razor right because that's the one time you

30:57

don't want to drop something is when you're

30:59

shaving your face or something special. You don't

31:02

want to cut yourself. But Harry's perfected

31:04

that. Like I love the razors. They have a lot

31:06

of different colors. The shave gel is really good and

31:08

the razors come with like a little protective head you

31:10

can put over the razor so you can travel with

31:12

it and like throw it in your bag. You don't

31:15

have to worry about reaching in and cutting yourself which

31:17

I really like. But they have customizable delivery options for

31:19

scheduled refills as low as $2. Half

31:21

of what you pay for bigger brands. You also

31:23

get a five blade razor with a weighted handle,

31:26

foaming shave gel, and a travel cover the

31:28

one that I talked about for $3 at

31:30

harrys.com. Slash aware. You got to use that

31:32

part for it to be three bucks. harrys.com/aware.

31:34

And they also have other products too. So

31:36

they have scents and things you can roll

31:38

on, spray on. They have lotions. They have

31:40

deodorant. They have hair products. I actually do

31:42

use certain hair products. People are gonna look

31:44

at me and be like oh you're bald.

31:46

I still do use stuff for my scalp

31:48

so I don't get dandruff. Alright. But you

31:50

can get started with a $13 trial

31:53

set for just $3 at

31:56

harrys.com/aware. Make sure you type

31:58

in slash aware because it drops the

32:00

price. You're welcome and yes it's a subscription

32:02

service and they're just gonna keep showing up and

32:04

you're not gonna be mad about it. Now we're

32:06

gonna talk about deodorant which is something that needs

32:08

to be talked about more. Lume is our last

32:11

sponsor and they're a deodorant company and trust and

32:13

believe. More people need to put effort into wearing

32:15

deodorant because I'm tired of smelling onions when I'm

32:17

at the gym. But a lot

32:19

of deodorant brands do wear off so a lot

32:21

of people do wear deodorant and then it's not

32:23

the long-lasting type like Lume. Some people put on

32:25

deodorant and think it's like okay just one and

32:27

done. I put it on multiple times throughout the

32:29

day but you need a longer-lasting deodorant. So if

32:31

you've been thinking about a new one or want

32:34

to get a new one Lume, highly recommend. They

32:36

actually have a lot of really good scents but

32:38

the best thing about Lume is it's an all-over

32:40

deodorant. You can literally put it anywhere on your

32:42

body. Do you have to? I don't

32:44

know, depends where you smell. But just

32:46

you know it's safe. You can put

32:48

it wherever you want to. Lume was

32:50

actually created by an OBGYN because the

32:52

doctor saw how normal BO was being

32:54

mistreated and misdiagnosed. And like I said

32:56

Lume's got you covered for a long

32:58

time. At 72 hours it

33:00

claims that it works. I do not ever

33:02

just put on one swipe and hope that

33:04

does it. I put it on multiple times

33:06

throughout the day like I said. But it

33:08

does say it's clinically proven to last

33:11

72 hours. So if

33:13

you got a little extra stink there

33:15

you go. It's also baking soda free

33:17

and paraban free and I have a

33:20

special offer for my listeners. New customers

33:22

get $5 off a Lume starter pack

33:24

with code AWARE at lumedeodorant.com. That's spelled

33:27

L-U-M-E. That equates to over 40% off

33:29

your starter pack when you visit lumedeodorant.com

33:31

and use code AWARE. Now

33:33

back to the podcast. So a couple things

33:36

I want you to ask yourself if you feel like this is

33:38

hitting home for you is I want

33:40

you to take the focus off of what they're

33:42

getting from you and ask

33:44

yourself like all these things I'm

33:46

doing for them all the ways I'm showing love

33:48

to them do I actually want to do these

33:50

things or do I just feel good doing them

33:53

because I know how it would feel to have

33:55

it done to me. That's a reality check from

33:57

hell but really ask yourself that. Do I actually

33:59

want to do these things or do

34:01

I just think I feel good doing it because

34:04

I know how it would feel to receive it.

34:06

Then you want this person to feel like they're

34:08

special. You want to give them that

34:10

especially if someone's insecure and they come to you and

34:12

they say that they're insecure they feel like they don't

34:14

have anything to offer they don't feel like they're valuable.

34:17

It's like if someone said that to you for

34:19

you to heal them and show them how

34:21

special they really are you would die for

34:23

someone to do that for you. So

34:26

check, are you just trying

34:28

to heal them the way you wish someone would

34:30

heal you? Are you doing these

34:32

things because you actually want to do them

34:34

or are you getting the satisfaction and the

34:37

sense of feeling good about doing them because

34:39

of what it's reflecting? Check

34:41

yourself on that please, please, please, please.

34:43

The next thing you're going to ask yourself because

34:45

now you see everything you're putting into this you're

34:48

showing all this love to this box you're convinced

34:50

was special. What are you getting? I

34:52

want you to take the focus off

34:55

of what they're getting because it's reflecting

34:57

how valuable you are and ask yourself

34:59

what am I getting from this thing?

35:03

And that is going to be a

35:06

real slap in the face most of the time. And one

35:08

more thing I want to point out is

35:11

when you fixate on loving

35:13

someone like this and doing this

35:15

for someone and trying to convince

35:17

yourself this box is so special

35:20

what you're looking for is the

35:22

reaction that they see

35:24

your value because like I said you're

35:26

doing all these things you're seeing what

35:28

you're giving them and you see what

35:31

they're getting because it makes you see

35:33

how special you are. What you're

35:35

now going to be fixated on is confirmation

35:37

that they fucking see it too. If

35:39

you don't feel appreciated you're never going

35:42

to and that is where you can

35:44

fixate on any little inkling

35:46

of them seeing the value in

35:49

you That you see that

35:51

they should be appreciating, That's going to be

35:53

your new fixation. So You're not even going

35:55

to be questioning what you're getting out of

35:58

shit. You're just going to keep doing more

36:00

and more and more. and trying to get

36:02

that reaction and that validation through their appreciation

36:04

of what you're doing. You. See how

36:07

it all makes sense? Now you see,

36:09

I don't want you get caught up

36:11

in that's fixation on the way that

36:13

they react to it and was missing.

36:15

Check your. Fixation. You might

36:17

be have been on. The reaction is so

36:19

you don't get caught in it. And like

36:21

I said before, putting all this effort and

36:24

energy and all this shit and the giddiness

36:26

sparking reassurance to do you even need it?

36:28

Do you even want it now that you're

36:30

aware of it and now that you see

36:32

you're putting a lot more into this than

36:35

you're getting with the Spock inbox. Now you

36:37

can't run the risk of being trapped in.

36:39

That's like your fixation will just jump from

36:41

other special and then to how they're seeing

36:44

that your special. Do. Not let the

36:46

fuck inhabit. Okay, so I know

36:48

I just went on and on about

36:50

when you convince yourself someone, especially when

36:52

they actually aren't how to get reality

36:54

about that great. But now I need

36:56

to hit on when you do actually

36:58

see something special and someone. And.

37:01

What to do about that? The biggest thing you

37:03

need to get. His. Of you

37:05

recognize something about someone as special and

37:07

they don't see it, You cannot make

37:09

them see it. You. Cannot love

37:11

someone and so loving themselves. You can

37:14

not make some one aware of the

37:16

thing that you recognize. If they don't

37:18

see it, they don't see it. And

37:20

the reason I want to warn you

37:22

about it is because you can drive

37:25

yourself stupid and hurt yourself and gets

37:27

to a point where it's bad because

37:29

you're trying to make someone see something

37:31

about themselves as special when they don't.

37:34

So. Remember me saying you cannot love someone

37:36

into loving themselves and I know it's hard

37:38

to deal with that and a lot of

37:40

times you're feeling like you're leading people to

37:42

suffer and like I thought about before, you

37:45

wish someone would have done things for use.

37:47

you're trying to do it for them. You

37:49

have to worry about yourself to try to

37:51

constantly go around and love people and see

37:53

the special one other people and take away

37:56

yours and hurt yourself to make other people

37:58

feel better. He can't do that. More

38:00

you can is is going cause more fuckin headache and

38:02

you're going to be in more pain. Looking at more

38:04

videos like this. But. The reason

38:06

I say you have to sometimes let

38:09

people. Not. See it.

38:11

If they're not gonna see it is because.

38:14

They have to be the ones to take

38:16

care of it. If you recognize something special

38:18

and someone you can't do anything, it's like

38:20

you guys see certain things and me and

38:22

if you saw me start spiraling and not

38:24

acting in line with the gift that I

38:26

have and what I'm able to do and

38:28

being the ultimate version of myself, if you

38:31

guys saw me slipping and not taking care

38:33

of it because I didn't see, this is

38:35

something that needed to be fostered and taking

38:37

care of it would drive you insane trying

38:39

to make me see it. but you cannot

38:41

control if I take care of it or

38:43

not. The special thing that I have when

38:45

you recognize it and somebody you can't control

38:47

of, they take care of it or not,

38:50

it's one of the hardest things to watch.

38:52

But. You. Cannot control of

38:54

it's taken care of or not. It

38:57

takes the person recognizing it and seeing

38:59

it and seeing themselves in a different

39:01

light and seeing themselves as valuable and

39:03

something worth taking care of To take

39:06

care of it and you can try.

39:08

Oh, you want to make someone see

39:10

it and you can get stuck trying

39:12

to make someone see themselves. And

39:14

this is where I'm going to say letting

39:17

them go. Is. Not

39:19

bad. And letting them

39:21

go. Before.

39:23

They see their own value. Does

39:25

it mean you don't care about them and

39:27

doesn't mean you don't see it If you

39:29

see something special and someone letting them go

39:32

doesn't take that away, you're gonna notice and

39:34

feel like are the only thing that reflects

39:36

the and you're like trying to hold on

39:38

to this person because I'm the only thing

39:40

that's like something good in their life and

39:42

reflecting them, something good about themselves and on.

39:44

The only one that can see it and

39:47

I'm the only one that can help them

39:49

see it. For. use a walk

39:51

away it doesn't go away it's always there

39:53

the thing that you see that is so

39:55

special about this person is ready for them

39:57

to act on it and see it is

39:59

so is they start looking. You

40:01

trying to force someone into finding it is not

40:03

going to work. They have to start looking. They

40:06

can't be a match to it because you just

40:08

put their face in a certain direction. They have

40:10

to hunt for it. They have to look for

40:12

it. This is one of the most heartbreaking fucking

40:14

things, but I want to give you that reassurance.

40:17

It doesn't mean you don't care if you walk

40:19

away and it doesn't mean the thing about them

40:21

is going to go away with you because like

40:23

I said, what you put your attention on, it

40:25

ceases to exist when you don't. This is a

40:27

situation where when a value is

40:29

actually there, it's not going

40:32

to go away because you're not focused on

40:34

it. Like you're looking at it like I'm

40:36

the only thing that's making them potentially see

40:38

it or feel it. It's

40:40

going to be there. What needs to happen is

40:43

for them to come face to face with

40:45

it. And sometimes losing someone is what does

40:47

it. If you notice you're

40:50

hurting yourself trying to make someone else

40:52

see that they're special, you

40:54

putting all your focus, energy and attention into

40:56

them is going to be a neglect to

40:58

you. That's why I'm saying you

41:00

need to get in the reality of shit and

41:02

you need to let yourself off the hook. If

41:04

you notice that you're neglecting yourself and you're noticed

41:06

that you're hurting yourself trying to

41:08

make someone see that they're special, it's

41:11

okay to let them go. Some

41:13

people have to get to a point where they

41:15

learn that they have to save themselves. It's

41:17

a very painful place to get to. And I'm sure we

41:20

have all been there. If you listen to me, you

41:22

like me, we've been to the worst of the worst

41:24

shit, right? You know how to save yourself. Some people

41:26

have to hit that point. Some people

41:28

have to stop being saved. So they look

41:30

for it in themselves and they save themselves

41:33

and they look for their own value and

41:35

they see it for themselves. So don't carry

41:37

any guilt for that. But also I want

41:39

you to see how you

41:42

are hanging onto an idea sometimes when you

41:44

are just desperately trying to get someone to

41:46

see their own value because you're selfishly seeing.

41:48

If you could just be like this, you

41:50

could meet all these needs for me. You

41:52

could be exactly what I wanted if you

41:55

would just act like you were fucking special

41:57

and take care of the thing that I

41:59

see. If they don't see it,

42:01

you subconsciously are gonna look at it like

42:03

they're robbing you of both

42:06

potentials. Let's not go down that

42:08

road, okay? Just hear me when

42:10

I say it's okay to let

42:12

someone go. Because that is what's gonna

42:14

kickstart their journey of trying to figure

42:16

out and see that they're special on

42:18

their own. Trust. And

42:21

one other thing that I've learned through

42:23

this long life of 25 years that seems

42:25

like 50 is sometimes people

42:29

are special because they're not

42:31

yours. What someone would

42:33

have to be and who they would

42:35

have to turn into to belong to

42:38

you, to date you, or to be

42:40

friends with you would ruin it.

42:42

Like what makes them special would be ruined

42:44

because they were yours. Some things are not

42:46

meant to be yours. Some things are only

42:48

special and only allowed to be special because

42:50

they can be their own thing. It's like

42:52

with me and people that I've like been

42:54

with my whole life and people that I've

42:56

like been interested in and dated

42:59

and like whatever. Certain aspects

43:01

about them. The thing that

43:03

I was so drawn to and the thing

43:05

that made me so attracted to them was

43:07

like the way that they lived their life

43:09

and their freedom and their creativity. Like I

43:12

love creativity on a motherfucker. But like to

43:15

be able to be creative means you

43:17

have to spend your time doing certain

43:19

things and going certain places. With what

43:21

I require from a partner and what

43:23

I need to feel safe is not

43:25

gonna allow them to fully express themselves

43:27

for who they are. It's

43:29

not that that's bad, but in order

43:31

for them to continue doing what made

43:34

them so special, for me

43:36

to try and date them, it would

43:38

ruin it. It would take away everything

43:40

that they're doing and everything that allows

43:42

them to be seen as special in

43:44

my eyes. It's fucked up and it's

43:46

very sad. Like your love can hurt

43:48

people. Sometimes love is not

43:50

enough and sometimes love can be

43:52

damaging. Especially to a motherfucker that don't

43:54

see their own value when you pour love at them.

43:56

Ooh, it's like pouring like poison on them. They don't

43:59

realize because they're not. not oriented and they

44:01

don't understand love. But same thing with

44:04

seeing something as special and trying to

44:06

make it yours, you can ruin it.

44:09

And sometimes it's only special because it's

44:11

not yours. It's allowed to be its

44:13

own thing. It's allowed to be free.

44:15

It's allowed to be and do what

44:18

makes it it or

44:20

makes them them. And when you try and put

44:22

them in a certain place in your life, it's

44:25

gonna ruin them and ruin

44:27

the thing that you see that made

44:29

them special because of what you need.

44:32

And that's one of the saddest

44:35

fucking things to realize and

44:37

I've had to let a lot

44:39

of things go. That's really fucking

44:41

sad. It's heartbreaking. Like it's really fucking hard to

44:43

go through and like let shit go

44:45

but like sometimes you just have to. And

44:48

what comes with that is the awareness that

44:51

you might always care about certain people

44:53

and certain opportunities and certain things that

44:55

have happened that you no longer have.

44:57

And you can fully care about something and

45:00

let it go. You don't have to stop

45:02

caring before you leave or let something go.

45:04

You can let it go even if you

45:06

love it. And sometimes you might love something

45:09

or love someone even after

45:11

it's gone. Like you see clearly how

45:13

it's not meant to be. When you

45:15

just see that and you

45:17

make the conscious decision to not go forward

45:19

with it, you might always

45:22

care. And that's okay. You

45:24

might always care about certain things about

45:26

people and that's fine. That's a normal part

45:28

of life. But like I

45:30

said you don't have to stop caring to move forward

45:33

and you don't have to not

45:36

look at something as special anymore because

45:38

having it would ruin it. You

45:41

don't have to degrade it and convince yourself

45:43

you don't like it. You can still appreciate

45:45

it and care about it and let it

45:47

go and let it be free.

45:50

It's heartbreaking. It's very hard

45:53

and you might always fucking care.

45:55

But that's okay. Part

45:58

of you human bitch. One

46:00

really big thing to remember is

46:02

if you're only focused on, like I said,

46:04

with the focus thing, if you spend your

46:06

focus and put it on something

46:09

that you've lost and you're upset

46:11

by it, or you're focused on how this

46:14

thing could just change and be different, you're

46:16

putting your focus here on what is not

46:18

right, what is not compatible and what is

46:20

not a match to you. So

46:24

your attention is not going to be able

46:26

to be put on things that are a

46:28

match to you and things that are also

46:30

special over here. You're only focused on this

46:32

shit. You're never going to be a match

46:34

to seeing the opposite or seeing other things

46:36

that are special when you're just hung up

46:38

on this one thing. And like

46:40

I said before, when you remove your attention and

46:42

your focus off of something, the heartbreak of that

46:44

is hard. It's very, very difficult. You're going to

46:46

get through it. You're going to be fucking fine.

46:49

You're going to be more than fine. The

46:52

true end is when you remove your

46:54

attention and your focus from something. When

46:57

you take it off of what doesn't work,

46:59

what isn't right, what is not compatible and

47:01

what you do not want, what can't meet

47:04

your needs, and just the

47:06

situation you know you need to walk away

47:08

from. When you take your focus and attention

47:10

off of it, you're free to put it

47:12

on what is a match to you and

47:14

what is equally as special and a better

47:16

situation and lining up with what you actually

47:18

need in this life, things that are actually

47:20

going to meet your needs, things that are

47:23

actually going to be so much better than

47:26

what you were just hung up on. So like

47:28

I said, removing the attention and the focus is

47:30

the official end. So be

47:32

prepared. When you do decide to

47:35

really take your focus off and take your attention

47:37

off, that's the real end and it's going to

47:40

feel hard and you're going to feel a heartbreak

47:42

and it's going to feel like a breakup all

47:44

over again and it's okay. And sometimes that's beautiful.

47:47

The special thing you see does not go

47:49

away. You're just choosing to go look

47:51

for other special things that

47:53

are going to fill that spot 10 times more. But

47:56

just enjoy that part of life. Love

47:59

and loss. normal. New beginnings are gonna

48:01

come. They're always gonna come, but you're not

48:03

gonna be a match to them till you

48:05

get that goddamn focus off. So do that,

48:08

okay? And

48:10

that is where I'm gonna leave you with this podcast. If

48:12

you enjoyed this episode, leave this video a thumbs up if

48:14

you're watching it on YouTube. Leave a comment too and let

48:16

me know what you think, because I got into this shit.

48:18

But if you're listening to the audio version on Apple Podcasts

48:21

and Spotify, leave this podcast to 5 Stars Rating. Maybe share

48:23

it to your Instagram story too, because I always see them

48:25

and I always go through and like them. I love when

48:27

y'all share my shit. As always, I will leave all my

48:29

social media links in the description, my app, my clothing, everything

48:31

you need from me will be down there. But if you've

48:34

watched this all the way to the end, I just want

48:36

to say I'm proud of you and thank

48:38

you for seeking the truth. But with

48:40

that, be safe, take care

48:42

of yourself, and I will talk to you next Sunday. Hey

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