Hey Gang!

It’s been a few months since I’ve posted anything on the BBSG Blog and Podcast.  The past few months have been an unexpectedly trying time for me in my personal life.  I’ve had to adjust my plans and redefine what my life was going to look like. 

My fiancé and I ended our engagement.  It wasn’t necessarily a mutual decision but I’vecome to realize for myself why it was a good thing.  For a period time though, I was in a funk…..adeep funk.

It didn’t matter where I was or who I was talking to.  I couldn’t shake the dark cloud, the heartachein my soul that I was feeling.  An outpouringof love and support came at me from friends, family and co-workers.  I was constantly trying to pivot my perspectiveand re-orient myself to see the love surrounding me, even though “The One” tookher love away. 

I felt like a zombie going through the motions.  I’d find myself in conversations with peopleand realize I literally wasn’t even able to hear anything that was beingsaid.  I could see mouths moving andhands waving but I couldn’t hear anything but the static silence in myhead.  There were times I couldn’t evenfeel the ground beneath my feet; like I was floating above the earth lifelesslymoving from one obligation to the next, doing what I was expected to do by theworld around me. 

This feeling did not leave me when I walked into my office andtook the role of a hospital Director.  I wasn’tmiraculously focused on the work I was paid to do.  It took every ounce of energy to focus myattention towards my team and to be their resource.  I still heard only static in my mind and feltthat I was floating along, uselessly caring about the obligations that didn’tmean shit to me at that time.  Thisincluded being the “Good Boss”. 

So I want to talk about the idea that some bosses have; “Peopleneed to leave their personal problems at home while they’re at work.”  I’ve always thought this was a silly expectationbut now I believe that anyone that says this, and believes it’s a realisticexpectation, is revealing their ignorance and is not a leader. 

So why am I telling you all this shit?  Well you lead people, human beings.  Only people. You don’t lead projects, departments or organizations.  All of these things are words to describe agroup of, or the product of a group of people…human beings.  You only lead PEOPLE!!

When a Boss says “You need to keep your personal problems athome.” He or she is using a catch phrase! A leadership buzz word!  Thesestupid sounds are just curtains used to shield the ignorance of a boss, butthey only serve to reveal that they’re not thinking, they’re not feeling, they’renot leading. 

Now that’s not saying it’s ok to underperform if you’regoing through some shit in your personal life but it’s also silly to think thatit doesn’t affect your work in some way. I recognized that there was no way that I was going to be “on my game”for a period of time while I worked through my breakup.  I let the managers on my team know that I knewthat I was in a funk but needed them to “call me out” if at anytime I absolutelydropped the ball on something and wasn’t giving them what they needed.

In a way I was asking for some grace as I work through my personal shit but I drew a line and wanted them to feel confident that I’d be receptive if I was neglecting them without realizing it.  A good boss does the same thing for those on their team who are preoccupied with personal things.  It’s not reasonable to think that a person can “leave personal problems at home”.  A good boss know this because a good boss leads PEOPLE. 

There’s another side of this that every boss should giveattention to.  People don’t leave their personallives at home and they also don’t leave their work bullshit at work.  A boss that creates an environment and toneat work that is toxic and miserable will contribute to that same feeling athome for their teams. 

This should alarm anyone who is a boss!  To truly embrace leadership, you need toembrace people and accept why we go to work in the first place.  We don’t go to work to find meaning andidentify.  (Well most of us don’t but I’mworking on this :/)  We go to work to supportthe people and lives that we create outside of work. 

A good boss does what he or she can do to create a tone, anenvironment, a sentiment amongst their teams that will bring light to andenhance their lives outside of work.  Goodbosses want work to enhance the reason people come to work in the first place.  Being a boss is a privilege and being a leaderis a calling and that calling is to be the source of good.  Good for the purpose or organization yourserving but ultimately a source of good for each individual human being thatyou influence. 

This strategy can only lead to good things because remember,lasting business success is a symptom of joyful souls.  So bosses: Don’t expect your team members to always leave home at home and don’tlet them take work home with them.   

To the Best Version of You.

-Michael Pawlak