0:00

Hello, my name is

0:00

Jeremy melder, and I'm the

0:02

presenter from Beaming Green.

0:02

Before we start, I would like to

0:07

acknowledge that this podcast is

0:07

being held on the traditional

0:11

lands of the Bundjalung people

0:11

and paying our respects to

0:15

elders both past, present and

0:15

emerging. Welcome to Season Two

0:22

of beaming green. Now available

0:22

on YouTube or your favorite

0:27

podcast platform. We offer an

0:27

array of inspiring guests

0:31

speaking about their life

0:31

experiences, on topics including

0:35

sustainable living,

0:35

environmental issues, and human

0:39

sustainability. So whether

0:39

you're a seasoned eco warrior,

0:44

or just starting your

0:44

sustainability journey, Beaming

0:48

Green has something for

0:48

everyone. So join us for season

0:52

two. And let been some green

0:52

together

1:07

well, Stephen, welcome back to

1:07

Beaming Green. Now last episode

1:10

we were talking about, you know

1:10

what led to your midlife crisis?

1:18

Or what do you call it? What's

1:18

the word you use your big tech,

1:21

spectacular midlife crisis? And

1:21

your trip around Australia? And

1:27

what happened there? But I guess

1:27

we're interested in what

1:31

happened next. You you kind of

1:31

moved to another state. And

1:40

things really moved from there,

1:40

didn't they?

1:44

Yeah, they

1:44

did. So yes, at the bottom of

1:49

the midlife crisis, and the

1:49

cause for the midlife crisis,

1:52

the spectacular midlife crisis

1:52

was a real sense of not knowing

1:56

what was going on, and what was

1:56

the cause of this discomfort

1:59

that I was experiencing. And

1:59

when I found out recognized

2:05

became aware that it was about

2:05

my concern around the direction

2:11

in which species is going, and,

2:11

you know, we talked about, we

2:17

both campus, and we talk about

2:17

going to a campsite. And it's,

2:23

it's a bit of a downer when you

2:23

get to the campsite. And it's,

2:25

you know, this mess from other

2:25

people that have been there. And

2:29

even when it's pristine, you

2:29

know, it's just such a joy to go

2:32

to a pristine campsite. And what

2:32

I like to do, and I know you do

2:37

as well is that when we leave

2:37

the campsite, that we leave the

2:40

campsite, and even, you know,

2:40

even an even better situation.

2:44

And I guess what I see as us as

2:44

a species is we're not leaving

2:47

the campsite, being the

2:47

metaphor, the world in in as

2:51

good a shape as when you and I

2:51

joined it 50 something years

2:55

ago. And that really, really

2:55

gets to me. So. So that was my

3:03

aha. And as, as disconcerting as

3:03

that is, it kind of brought me

3:10

back into the driver's seat, I

3:10

went, Okay, so I'm feeling

3:14

deeply depressed. But now I know

3:14

why I'm feeling deeply

3:19

depressed. And it was actually

3:19

about the fact there was two

3:24

aspects, the first aspect was

3:24

that that big in an overwhelming

3:27

kind of a situation for those of

3:27

us that are connecting to that.

3:31

And that that puts us put me in

3:31

a very uncomfortable states. So

3:37

that is that was going on for

3:37

me. The second thing was the

3:41

realization that I wasn't doing

3:41

as much as I could have possibly

3:47

been doing. Even though I had a

3:47

highly influential role,

3:51

consulting to the highest levels

3:51

of government on human

3:55

sustainability issues. The

3:55

Department of Human Human

3:59

Services, the Department of

3:59

Education, the Department of

4:04

Family and Community Services

4:04

and Indigenous Affairs, I mean,

4:07

I was consulting at the highest

4:07

levels to solve sustainable

4:12

issues for individuals, the

4:12

people in the environment. So

4:16

that was great. But that wasn't

4:16

enough for me to resolve this

4:21

deep sense that we're not

4:21

leaving the campsite in as good

4:25

a shape as we arrived. So for

4:25

me, what I became what became

4:29

really aware is that I needed to

4:29

become what I attend that I that

4:34

I coined, which was sustainably

4:34

authentic. But it put me back

4:38

into the driver's seat. So yes,

4:38

I still felt that, you know,

4:42

that, that yearning and that

4:42

depression associated with how

4:46

bad the situation was. And I'm

4:46

not overdramatizing there. But

4:52

it also put me into a place of

4:52

questioning how could I most

4:56

effectively, positively

4:56

contribute to that situation? So

5:00

now I could act again. And I'm

5:00

uncomfortable when I can act.

5:06

I've spent a lifetime of acting

5:06

in accordance to my guidance, I

5:10

guess. Yeah. So that's what the

5:10

next part of the journey was

5:13

about.

5:14

I just got a

5:14

question for you. So you, as you

5:16

said, you're working in the

5:16

highest levels of, of

5:19

government. Right? Consulting to

5:19

you in consulting to, and I'm

5:25

just wondering whether even our

5:25

listeners are thinking this, you

5:27

know, it's like, okay, so that's

5:27

kind of a pretty pointed and

5:31

influential part that you could

5:31

be coming from right. But you've

5:36

chosen to do it differently,

5:36

why?

5:39

It just

5:39

didn't. So I didn't feel. And

5:42

it's a valid question. I didn't

5:42

feel that I was sustainably

5:46

authentic. At that time. Yeah.

5:46

And up until that time, I felt

5:52

like I was really congruent with

5:52

that requirement to leave the

5:55

campsite and in a better

5:55

condition as when I arrived. But

5:59

with this new awareness about

5:59

this thing that had been

6:01

creeping up on me, I needed to

6:01

do more. And because I see

6:07

myself as a good man, I'm like,

6:07

well, if I'm a good man, then I

6:13

need to do something about that.

6:13

And I can't expect anybody else

6:17

to do that. So I went through a

6:17

very, very personal journey

6:21

around what it was to be

6:21

sustainable man, a sustainable

6:27

father, a sustainable husband, a

6:27

sustainable community member.

6:32

And what I had to do was pull a

6:32

bunch of stuff that wasn't

6:39

congruent with that. That way

6:39

that I was defining it. And you

6:46

know, the context is, we spent

6:46

six months on the road going

6:49

around Australia, in you know,

6:49

pretty, we pretty much had

6:55

nothing, right? We had a, we had

6:55

a pretty dodgy camper trailer

6:59

that was 25 years old, we cooked

6:59

our meals on a gas stove, we had

7:03

a tiny little solar panel that

7:03

provided all of our electricity

7:06

requirements. And we were living

7:06

an abundant enriched kind of

7:10

experience. There was no

7:10

compromise in that for me,

7:14

except maybe we're burning a bit

7:14

more diesel than I would have

7:16

liked. At my footprint in

7:16

Canberra, where we lived, we had

7:21

this huge house that was very

7:21

energy inefficient in summer to

7:27

call and be comfortable and very

7:27

energy efficient, inefficient,

7:31

and winter to heat. And I went,

7:31

Oh, that's just not congruent

7:36

with this man I want to be. And

7:36

I could probably build a mud

7:39

brick house or something in

7:39

Canberra, that Canberra also

7:43

didn't seem to be the place

7:43

anymore. Now, because my work

7:47

there. Obviously, when I was

7:47

consulting to federal

7:50

government, it was appropriate

7:50

for me to be there, then sure.

7:53

But I had a bigger job to do,

7:53

which involved all aspects of

7:58

myself, but started, you know,

7:58

with me, all change begins

8:03

within and then to us personally

8:03

and then. And then my

8:07

experiences, it ripples out from

8:07

there into our primary

8:11

relationship, my my wife, my

8:11

kids, my family members,

8:18

parents, if they're still alive,

8:18

a mum was still like, my dad

8:21

wasn't alive at that point. And

8:21

it was about becoming authentic

8:25

in that manifestation of myself

8:25

without sounding too woowoo. So

8:31

I kind of unpeel the onion until

8:31

I got to a point where I felt

8:35

Yes, this is absolutely right.

8:35

And what are this? How am I

8:39

going to rebuild this stack? And

8:39

and I went back to kind of root

8:42

causes. So the question was,

8:42

okay, so I need to live in a

8:46

sustainably authentic way. And

8:46

that means I need to have

8:50

minimal carbon footprint,

8:50

basically. So an efficient house

8:56

that is comfortable, but not

8:56

necessarily as big as the one we

9:00

had in Canberra, being more

9:00

connected to our environment, so

9:04

finding a climate that was more

9:04

kind of connected to us, because

9:08

we lived on the canvas for 12

9:08

months, was kind of like liking

9:12

the outdoors things. And the

9:12

thing about being outdoors is

9:16

that when I'm in the forest,

9:16

when I'm in nature, when I'm in

9:20

the water, I am more connected

9:20

to my higher self than when I'm

9:24

sitting in an office or when I'm

9:24

punching away at a computer or

9:28

whatever. So yeah, it was like a

9:28

it was a gradual kind of

9:32

recalibration process for me to

9:32

find this thing called

9:37

Sustainable authenticity. And I

9:37

read a bunch of books. Some of

9:42

those were about, you know, kind

9:42

of taking a step back a bit like

9:47

Steiner, the Steiner education

9:47

process, where it's all about

9:51

kind of connecting the child

9:51

connecting with themselves,

9:54

connecting with their value set,

9:54

connecting with their

9:57

environment, and then connecting

9:57

with stories To kind of ground

10:00

them to, you know, history and

10:00

and building kind of a context

10:04

to to be a good human being, you

10:04

know, thriving in their

10:08

environment. So I kind of had to

10:08

do that for myself. And in fact,

10:11

I've been read, I'm doing that

10:11

to talk today. You know, I've

10:15

got a really strong mission now.

10:15

And I'm playing to that strong

10:18

mission. And it's a constant

10:18

process of calibration. Going,

10:22

am I where I thought I was going

10:22

to be? Where am I truly? Where

10:26

would I love to be? What's my

10:26

highest self say I need to be?

10:29

And therefore, what's the course

10:29

correction that I need to make?

10:32

And it's, you know, it's

10:32

constantly refining it's

10:36

constant refining process for

10:36

refinement process. So I did

10:39

that. And there was many helpers

10:39

in the way. But basically, what

10:44

that did was at first, there was

10:44

a question as if we're not going

10:48

to live in Canberra, where are

10:48

we going to live? And we found

10:51

five really energetic, alive

10:51

places. And this area near Mount

11:00

warning was one of the ones one

11:00

of those five, and it of all,

11:03

the fire that felt the most,

11:03

most practical, and the most

11:09

beautiful environment for us to

11:09

grow our kids up, right. So

11:11

then, that 10 or 11, right?

11:11

Yeah. The weather was great. It

11:16

felt like New Zealand, but it

11:16

was a bit warmer, it felt really

11:19

energetic alive, I had a

11:19

community of people that I knew

11:21

pretty well, good spiritual

11:21

practice. And I was connected

11:26

with my environment. So we spent

11:26

a year serendipity kind of

11:32

opened up again, a dear friend

11:32

decided to go to Scotland. And

11:37

he said, you know, would you like to rent our house, you know, pay for the, for the

11:38

mortgage for three months? While

11:42

we're away? I don't know if

11:42

we'll be away for three months,

11:44

or it might be more. So we said

11:44

yes. OB Yes. And we spent that

11:50

time that didn't come back for

11:50

11 months. That's nice. We spent

11:55

that time looking at all the

11:55

potential properties in that

11:58

area that could serve what I

11:58

what I thought I could possibly

12:04

do, because when I look back, I

12:04

went well, okay. So if I flogged

12:07

the house in Canberra, then we

12:07

could buy a place that could be

12:14

for expanded consciousness or,

12:14

or for people who have been

12:21

through my experience, to

12:21

connect them in a practical and

12:25

pragmatic way to how they might

12:25

be sustainably authentic. So I

12:30

got interested in earth

12:30

building, I got interested in

12:35

community building, I got

12:35

interested in, you know,

12:39

sustainable living practices.

12:39

And those aren't all about, you

12:45

know, the environment and all

12:45

that kind of stuff. You know,

12:48

sustainability for me is about

12:48

how do we live in a peaceful,

12:52

harmonious, fun and sustainable

12:52

way. And to look after

12:58

everything, and everybody,

12:58

including Mother Nature. So this

13:03

is the place we decided to, to

13:03

come to. And I thought, given

13:08

that I'm a I'm a trained

13:08

educator and a reasonably good

13:12

communicator, that maybe I could

13:12

build some curriculum, some

13:15

practice and provide a place for

13:15

kids in the first instance, to

13:20

come and have a camp have a

13:20

sustainable school experience.

13:24

And because now my colleagues

13:24

from my teaching past and our

13:29

headmaster's and staff, I said,

13:29

Look, you know, is this

13:32

something that that could ride?

13:32

Could it work? And because I was

13:35

worried about, I wasn't worried,

13:35

but I'm like curious about.

13:39

Okay, so how am I going to put

13:39

food on the table? Yeah. And

13:43

live and make a contribution?

13:43

And it's like, that's a pretty

13:48

big question, right? And it's a

13:48

big question that everybody has

13:51

when they're going through these

13:51

moments of transition. And the

13:55

propensity for me is to go back

13:55

to what I already knew. But I

14:00

knew that going back to being a

14:00

management consultant, as

14:05

influential as it was, at the

14:05

highest levels of government,

14:08

and I'm not saying that, I don't

14:08

want to overblow that, but I

14:12

didn't, I was carrying, you

14:12

know, independent influence

14:17

around particular issues. But it

14:17

wasn't about that. For me, it

14:22

was actually about finding what

14:22

was that about? What was about

14:26

that, that notion of sustainable

14:26

authenticity that landed for me

14:30

personally, and then my wife, my

14:30

primary relationship, and then

14:34

my kids, and then, you know, and

14:34

so on, and so forth. So I

14:38

dreamed up this idea of,

14:38

basically an eco camp for kids

14:42

to do to have sustainable

14:42

experience that's connected to

14:46

to the bush. Yeah. So yeah.

14:52

How did that work

14:52

for you? Like, I guess, you

14:54

know, you would had a couple of

14:54

challenges in it. You know, how

15:00

did your family react to that?

15:00

In terms of what you wanted to

15:04

do? Because this is something

15:04

that you've, you've got on a

15:06

mission that you'd like to

15:06

follow, but like, was your

15:10

partner and your kids happy

15:10

about this?

15:12

Yeah, look,

15:12

the kids were pretty happy. I

15:15

mean, the kids, the kids trusted

15:15

us right? In their 9 and 11. My

15:20

mum and dad go, they kind of go,

15:20

you know, the, the male variety

15:26

of the children, he was really

15:26

comfortable with this, and the

15:29

female variety, she was like,

15:29

Well, I want to go back to

15:31

Canberra, I want to go back to Steiner School, and I want to be with my friends. But when when I

15:33

we looked at that, objectively,

15:39

it's like, we really understood

15:39

that, you know, we were her safe

15:45

harbor. And we can still provide

15:45

her with a safe harbor and

15:50

access to her friends. And

15:50

nothing's ever the same when you

15:56

go back to where you were. It's

15:56

got glimpses of it, but we're in

16:01

a timeline, a time continuum,

16:01

it's always changing. So I felt

16:05

comfortable about the most

16:05

important thing was to provide a

16:08

safe harbor for her. And an

16:08

environment. We're all where we

16:11

were all congruent with, I've

16:11

only set with my wife. That was

16:18

that was like a eight month

16:18

journey, I guess. And there was,

16:22

you know, people that knew us

16:22

both. I'd be like, people to how

16:27

things are going for you. Um,

16:27

that's amazing, you know? Oh, my

16:31

God. That's incredible dream and

16:31

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,

16:34

right. And I think I enhance how

16:34

Sonya? And I go, yeah, she's

16:39

great. She's totally on board.

16:39

And they kind of go,

16:42

are you sure?

16:43

Exactly. Are

16:43

you sure. And during that eight

16:47

months, there was, you know,

16:47

that was, that was a time where

16:55

my passion and my realization

16:55

kind of hadn't caught up with

16:59

her. And she's, you know,

16:59

questioning, you know, how do I

17:06

fit with this? M? And there was

17:06

no question that she agree that

17:10

that was the right thing for us

17:10

to do. It was the how we were

17:15

going to do that. And even the

17:15

question of whether or not we're

17:18

going to land here was a

17:18

question of contention. She's

17:22

Italian, lots of culture around

17:22

family, big drawback to

17:25

Melbourne, aging parents. That

17:25

we were able to take it off step

17:32

by step, and kind of to move

17:32

down that continuum. And then we

17:36

ended up in, you know, before

17:36

we, you know, right, there was

17:42

there was this kind of crucible

17:42

moment where there was so much

17:45

heat and pressure on us. And I

17:45

remember one day where I was

17:50

literally in tears. And I said,

17:50

Look, I just give this whole

17:55

dream away, if that's what you

17:55

want me to do, because I'm more

18:00

committed to you than I am to

18:00

anything else, other than my own

18:05

kind of personal development.

18:05

And in that moment, I think

18:09

she's, she then believed me

18:09

probably for the for the first

18:11

time again in eight months. And

18:11

she's like, okay. And I kind of

18:16

something snapped. I mean, what

18:16

she wanted was she wanted

18:18

everything that I was choosing.

18:18

And she wanted, for my dream to

18:24

have infrastructure rather than

18:24

a bare piece of land, because I

18:27

was looking into 1000 acres.

18:27

That's right. And now

18:31

infrastructure, so she wanted a

18:31

house. Not so unreasonable for a

18:34

wife and a mother. She wanted to

18:34

a sealed driveway. She wanted a

18:43

reliable water source and

18:43

electrical source. And she

18:48

wanted to be 15 minutes to the

18:48

kids school. Not so

18:52

unreasonable, right? Not really.

18:52

And I'm like, Okay, well, that's

18:57

great. But we've only got we've

18:57

sold the house in Canberra and

18:59

done pretty well and got a little bit more money than we, we bought it for. But I'm like,

19:01

that's a really finite resource.

19:05

And you're getting what you

19:05

want, and me getting what I

19:08

want. It's like, or I want what

19:08

you want, but it's like, I just

19:12

don't see how that goes

19:12

together. And we've been I've

19:16

been doing a lot of study around

19:16

manifestation. And I learned and

19:21

I have learned as cuckoo is this

19:21

ounce that the how is not

19:26

actually necessarily our

19:26

responsibility if we're going to

19:29

manifest on a large scale.

19:29

What's important is actually to

19:34

be congruent with what you're

19:34

looking to manifest your vision

19:37

what you would love. So, you

19:37

know, she said, But wouldn't you

19:40

like that as well? Wouldn't you

19:40

like some infrastructure for

19:42

your for your sustainable? When

19:42

you like a house, and I go,

19:46

Yeah, yeah, but it's not fucking

19:46

possible. You know, I don't see

19:49

it being possible. Yeah. Jesus.

19:49

Yeah, but but do you want that

19:52

and I go, Yeah, of course I do.

19:52

In hindsight, the thing I would

19:56

have wished for is a creek that

19:56

ran through the place and I kind

20:00

of said, but I said the I want

20:00

that as well. And Jeremy,

20:05

believe it or not, she found the

20:05

property, we ended up buying

20:10

that nine on the internet.

20:12

I remember that

20:12

moment. It was crazy.

20:16

And there's there's a whole nother story about how that process thing

20:18

played out. But it was about a

20:23

pivotal moment was to because I

20:23

have, I had an unwavering

20:27

commitment to her and our

20:27

relationship. And I had this

20:31

dream. And I hadn't acknowledged

20:31

her part of that dream, which

20:37

was the house and stuff because

20:37

I for practical reasons, I

20:40

didn't feel like we had the

20:40

right amount of money to be able

20:43

to afford that. I kind of felt

20:43

like if I went to a real estate

20:46

agent and said, Hey, I'd like

20:46

all these things. And I've only

20:49

got this much money, the real

20:49

estate agent would be going,

20:51

that's great. Let me refer you

20:51

to my competitors, because

20:55

you're an idiot.

20:56

Call a

20:56

psychologist.

21:01

Exactly. Right. So the proposition was ridiculous, right? So I'm going

21:03

this doesn't compute. But what

21:07

was important is that I just

21:07

needed to choose that. That

21:13

choice was congruent with both

21:13

of us. So I choose her

21:16

primarily. And I choose the

21:16

secondary thing with her

21:20

together. And as soon as that

21:20

happened, the miracle occurred.

21:25

The miracle, which is now called

21:25

climate, eco retreat and spa,

21:28

which people now think is like a

21:28

real thing. But it was, it

21:31

wasn't a real thing, then it was

21:31

just, it was just a dream. And

21:35

that's the power of

21:35

manifestation. And it's

21:38

illogical. And it's like magic.

21:38

Because we don't have anything

21:44

in our context to explain how

21:44

that can happen. You know, when

21:46

we go to school, they don't

21:46

teach us about manifestation.

21:50

And that's why part of the

21:50

second part of my life or

21:54

course, living a rich and

21:54

purposeful life is about

21:57

manifestation. The first part of

21:57

it is, what do you want? Because

22:00

that's the hardest thing. Yeah.

22:00

What do you truly want? And what

22:05

is in alignment with you, your

22:05

soul and all the other decisions

22:08

you're making? Like your

22:08

partner? The thing was, I'd made

22:11

a decision about something, but

22:11

it wasn't in alignment with my

22:13

partner's decision. And we

22:13

needed to get common ground. And

22:18

when we got there, ridiculous as

22:18

it sounds this thing manifested.

22:22

Yeah. I mean, how

22:22

many people do you think go

22:25

through this really, right?

22:25

There's so many couples, even,

22:29

it's even a struggle doing it on

22:29

your own, but you know, even

22:32

with couples is quite a big

22:32

negotiation, and actually coming

22:35

on to the same level ground,

22:35

it's like, how do you get to

22:38

that point, you know, with, with

22:38

someone, because we're all

22:44

different, we really are, it's

22:44

like, you might love each other

22:48

to pieces, you know, but at the

22:48

at the same time, you don't you

22:52

want what you want, the other

22:52

person wants what they want, and

22:56

you got to marry that too. So I

22:56

think that's, you know, a

23:00

successful outcome that you and

23:00

Sonya have achieved, because I

23:05

can see how it's manifested now,

23:05

years along, you know, down the

23:10

track. And I guess I've got a

23:10

question in terms of through

23:14

that process, you know, over

23:14

that period. So you've got, now

23:17

you've got daimyo eco retreat,

23:17

and you've been going through

23:20

your own personal journey, or

23:20

journeys together, because

23:25

there's obviously journeys that

23:25

you both would have gone

23:27

through. And what the other

23:27

influences that came into this

23:32

in terms of influencing you in

23:32

your mindset, that helped you?

23:38

Totally,

23:38

absolutely, yeah, 1000s of them,

23:40

right. Yeah. Yeah, and the

23:40

thing, the thing that. So I just

23:47

want to say a little something a little bit about what you were talking about with Sonya and me.

23:49

I think everybody goes through

23:52

it. The thing is that there

23:52

doesn't seem to be culture in

23:56

our contemporary Australian

23:56

environment, to say, hey,

24:00

firstly, these crisises are

24:00

normal. And you got to do the

24:06

work for yourself. First and

24:06

foremost, if you get a

24:08

realization and transformation,

24:08

the next stage of that process

24:11

is you need to make that

24:11

harmonize that in your

24:14

environment. And as part of

24:14

that, your environment might

24:18

change, like a relationship

24:18

might break down, because it's

24:21

no longer congruent with who you

24:21

truly are. And I think that's to

24:24

be celebrated. Yeah. But also, I

24:24

don't think that's the default

24:29

answer. Because you see, so I

24:29

see so many marriages that

24:33

finish when the kids are, you

24:33

know, 10 or 11, or 12, or

24:36

1315 16. Because the parents

24:36

finally go, Oh, great. The kids

24:41

don't need me anymore. Now. Now

24:41

I can go and be me. Because I

24:44

know love will no longer love

24:44

her or him. And I think that's

24:50

firstly a bit dangerous. That

24:50

notion because, for me that

24:55

process that Sonia and I went

24:55

through for eight months. That

24:59

could be orchestra Do it in a

24:59

much more efficient and

25:01

effective way if there was

25:01

somebody who was guiding us, but

25:04

we had to do that on our own, or

25:04

it felt like we had to do it on

25:07

our own. So I'm like part of me

25:07

is going where is our human

25:11

culture to help us to navigate

25:11

these very identifiable moments

25:16

in our lives and our life's

25:16

journeys. And we don't have to

25:19

jettison relationships in order

25:19

to evolve. But we do need to do

25:23

something in the relationship to

25:23

support the evolution of the

25:27

relationship. So I just wanted

25:27

to say that. So I think that in

25:32

our future, Sonya, and I've got

25:32

some work around relationships.

25:35

Sure. To come back to your other

25:35

question, I think everybody's

25:40

going through, you know,

25:40

significant moments of

25:43

transition, I've mapped 60 of

25:43

them. They are unavoidable. Some

25:47

of them are good, some of them

25:47

are bad. Some of them can smash

25:50

you to the ground, and some of

25:50

them can kill you. I've seen

25:54

those things. You know, your

25:54

people having heart attacks,

25:58

without sounding woowoo, right.

25:58

I don't think all this is just

26:02

associated with, you know,

26:02

physical conditions, I actually

26:05

think there's some other things

26:05

in play. It's kind of like

26:07

manifesting, like miracles. It's

26:07

like, if I don't listen to what

26:10

my souls agenda is, I get

26:10

smashed. It's like a big wave

26:14

that smashes me to the ground

26:14

and grazes my face, I have had

26:17

that experience. I'm a science

26:17

guy. And I go, if I'm not in

26:20

alignment with my soul's agenda,

26:20

I get the shit kicked out. And I

26:23

totally

26:24

get that, you

26:24

know, like, with my rheumatoid

26:27

arthritis, my body is telling

26:27

given me lots of signs, you

26:31

know, that there's something

26:31

going on? And I need to listen,

26:35

you know, like it you other

26:35

people listening might think

26:38

it's, I agree, you know, but you

26:38

do, it's about for me, I've now

26:43

got this aha thing that I just

26:43

have to slow down a bit. I'm

26:47

going too fast. I'm overworking

26:47

it, I'm not approaching it in

26:51

the right way. All of these

26:51

things are signs, I think,

26:56

exactly. And I

26:56

don't know about you. But when

26:59

I, when I get back into a

26:59

pattern, that's not supporting

27:03

my highest good, my symptoms

27:03

turn up. You're you rheumatoid

27:08

arthritis is my depression. And

27:08

I that comes up and down, it

27:12

goes up and down in waves, and

27:12

my behavior, my intention, my

27:16

focus can change that. Yeah. And

27:16

I'm getting reasonably good at

27:20

responding to that, as you

27:20

probably are around diet and

27:23

exercise and mindset, and all

27:23

that sort of stuff, you fix your

27:25

rheumatoid arthritis, and the

27:25

doctors will go, No, you've got

27:28

it all. And you've just got to

27:28

put up with it. And yeah, and

27:31

that degree, if you feel like,

27:31

if you feel like a victim in

27:35

your life, then then we can

27:35

accept that, right? And it's

27:38

like, there's lots of statistics

27:38

that say that if you've got

27:40

depression, you're more likely

27:40

to get depression. And it's

27:43

gonna get worse and worse and

27:43

worse. But actually, my

27:45

experience is that I've had

27:45

depression. And if I bring

27:49

awareness from these various

27:49

teachers, which is the third

27:52

part of your question, then I

27:52

can learn you know,

27:56

neuroplasticity is a thing. And

27:56

our minds are not the center of

27:59

the universe. For me, I think

27:59

the soul is setting the agenda.

28:04

So intuition agenda, absolutely.

28:04

My mind should be a tool of my

28:08

of my soul. If I look at the

28:08

hierarchy, soul is what souls

28:12

orientation is like, key for me.

28:14

I agree with that

28:14

statement. Because I think that

28:16

a lot of us, including myself,

28:16

over time, have recognized this,

28:21

you know, that you can get so

28:21

caught up in what's going on up

28:24

in your head. But really,

28:24

ultimately, there is a soul

28:28

agenda within yourself. And you

28:28

might not be aware of it, but

28:32

you have to surrender a little

28:32

bit towards that and say, Okay,

28:35

I don't have the answer, because

28:35

you're trying to run this from

28:38

your head. But if you're quiet,

28:38

if I quiet and myself, plug

28:43

myself in nature, I might get a

28:43

little bit of an answer for it.

28:46

You know what I mean? I always

28:46

find in nature, there's an

28:48

answer

28:49

comes through

28:49

in nature, there's an answer,

28:52

and that's profound. Exactly.

28:52

And that was my realization as

28:57

well, because my antidote to my,

28:57

my lack of understanding during

29:03

the spectacular midlife crisis,

29:03

my antidote was to just to sink

29:07

into my family, and to sink into

29:07

nature, and to be in a war. And

29:14

as part of that process, you

29:14

know, the answers kind of

29:17

flowed. But I had so much going

29:17

on up there. I talked about it

29:23

being, you know, clearing my

29:23

internal mailbox. Yeah. I wasn't

29:27

able to hear it, but definitely

29:27

the antidotes were family, doing

29:31

stuff that I love the things

29:31

that enrich me and immersing in

29:35

a natural environment. And then

29:35

from there when I was starting

29:40

to do the rebuild, so I was

29:40

reading a bunch of books I was,

29:43

you know, going back. So almost

29:43

nobody helped me to understand

29:48

how to navigate to the aha

29:48

moment of what was the root

29:50

cause of my spectacular midlife

29:50

crisis. Psychologists had a

29:55

crack at it, but maybe I'm slow

29:55

or whatever, but nobody really

29:59

helped me with that. But after I

29:59

had a realization that I needed

30:02

to become sustainably authentic,

30:02

I could then start to dialogue

30:04

with people and I was just

30:04

dialoguing everywhere,

30:08

attending, you know, kind of

30:08

Melbourne sustainability

30:11

conferences and traveling to New

30:11

Zealand and, you know, getting

30:14

deep in some of my spiritual

30:14

practices and, you know, just go

30:18

into workshops and all that kind

30:18

of stuff. And I guess what I was

30:20

doing then was going, Okay, so

30:20

I'm an optimizer, I class myself

30:24

as an optimizer. And that meets

30:24

and complex problem solver. And

30:28

that made me a pretty good

30:28

management consultant, because

30:31

I'd look at the entire frame

30:31

maybe greater than the frame,

30:35

and then diagnose what the

30:35

issues were, then look for

30:38

pragmatic and an implementable

30:38

solutions. So I did that to this

30:41

situation, right? Because what

30:41

my hypothesis is, okay, so this

30:46

is my hypothesis. So if we're

30:46

not leaving the metaphorical

30:50

campsite, in the right shape, so

30:50

how do we get to a place where

30:55

we do that? For me, we need to

30:55

first part of it is that we need

31:02

to get everybody connected to

31:02

source not connected to what

31:08

they think they should be doing.

31:08

But getting them connected to

31:12

what's important. That's the

31:12

first thing. And then the second

31:18

thing is then to provide them

31:18

with a mechanism by which to

31:23

then start to move towards their

31:23

own version of functionality. So

31:34

as part of that process, I

31:34

realized that I needed to model

31:38

for myself and then potentially

31:38

others, what's the standard, my

31:42

version of sustainable

31:42

authenticity was about. So

31:46

having an eco retreat, a place

31:46

of consciousness that's

31:48

connected to the beautiful

31:48

environment, allowing trends of

31:51

supporting transformational

31:51

growth and change, that's like a

31:54

great thing to do, right. So

31:54

that's where we were tracking

31:59

towards, and, you know, I had

31:59

Murieta teachers there. And also

32:05

myriads of opportunities to

32:05

waste time, and to go down

32:08

rabbit holes, and all that kind

32:08

of stuff. And I guess, as part

32:11

of my journey, I've just learned

32:11

the power of my mind, but also

32:16

the power of just listening to

32:16

my gut feel listening to my

32:19

intuition, and saying yes to

32:19

that, even if it doesn't always

32:22

logically line up. Because that

32:22

allowed me and it allows me

32:26

still to make quicker and better

32:26

decisions. So, you know, so for

32:32

me, it was about getting a

32:32

feeling of a person or, or a

32:36

book or whatever, and going, you

32:36

know, is there value there, even

32:40

though it may not seem logical,

32:40

then, if I feel it, just do it,

32:45

and even if it felt logical, and

32:45

it didn't feel right, they're

32:49

not doing it, you know, just

32:49

just following that path. And

32:51

getting better at that, and, and

32:51

taking a personal diary of, you

32:57

know, where I feel like I'm

32:57

making progress towards my

32:59

mission, coke, creating

32:59

peaceful, harmonious, fun and

33:04

sustainable world. And when I'm

33:04

not, I did a whole bunch of

33:07

men's work, actually, yeah, you

33:07

know, we came together around

33:10

mankind project, and mankind

33:10

project, I got almost complete

33:16

mission came down to me in one

33:16

of the processes, and I will be

33:20

forever grateful for that

33:20

process, right. And so, you

33:25

know, there's lots of

33:25

opportunity for growth and

33:27

getting out of ourselves. But,

33:27

you know, for me, it's about I

33:31

feel like, my role is to help

33:31

make some of these kinds of

33:37

wisdom of the ages, things more

33:37

accessible for people. And I

33:43

don't care how to do that. I

33:43

just, that's my mission. And if

33:46

so that gets people into their

33:46

hearts and knowing what's

33:48

important to them, then there's

33:48

a good chance that we're all

33:51

going to start, you know,

33:51

behaving in a more functional

33:53

way. And if we do that, then

33:53

hey, we might leave the campsite

33:56

in the shade. And then our kids

33:56

kids won't have to live in

34:01

compromise. You know, they could

34:01

have it easily have a way better

34:05

life. And you know, AI could

34:05

easily play an important role as

34:08

part of that. I mean, I'm

34:08

completely open to that. And I'm

34:11

also aware that, you know, AI

34:11

might present some risks for us

34:15

as humans as well, sure. It's

34:15

kind of all good. It's all

34:18

complex. Yeah. And dumbing it

34:18

down to simple, simple things is

34:23

not necessarily the best way to go forward.

34:26

So we're coming

34:26

to winding up now because we we

34:28

said we're going to commit to 20

34:28

minutes of doing this second

34:32

part of the journey, but just a

34:32

little bit of insight for people

34:39

about last apple if they choose

34:39

to jump off now and not listen

34:44

to the next episode, which I

34:44

would hope they would want to

34:47

listen to the next episode. But

34:47

what what would you expect

34:52

people that attend a course or a

34:52

weekend? Maybe not this time,

34:58

but next time I Living a rich

34:58

and purposeful life, what would

35:02

you expect they would? Or would

35:02

or could get from this? It's

35:08

their own individual journey,

35:08

just like you just shared, you

35:10

know, we're all on different

35:10

journeys. What would you hope is

35:14

you've learned a lot, obviously,

35:14

that you'd love to share.

35:17

Yeah, so so we

35:17

have lots of transformational

35:21

retreats that go through our

35:21

place. And they're all, you

35:24

know, they're all valuable. So,

35:24

for me, the ideal person who

35:31

wants to go on lap or living a

35:31

rich and purposeful life is

35:34

somebody who aspires to do that.

35:34

And when they look at current

35:37

reality, they go, Well, that's

35:37

not, I'm not experiencing that.

35:42

And there's something in them

35:42

that says, I was built for more,

35:47

I've got more potential than

35:47

this, I expected that life

35:51

wasn't gonna end up quite like

35:51

this. And they have got that

35:55

little voice in the back of the

35:55

head to say, this isn't quite

35:59

right, but I'm not sure where

35:59

the answers are. So if you're

36:03

experiencing that, and some of

36:03

those situations are often

36:06

precipitated by a significant

36:06

moment of transition, you know,

36:10

it could be may be made

36:10

redundant, could be finding out

36:16

that your job just doesn't float

36:16

your boat anymore. Now, because

36:18

you're feeling a little

36:18

compromised. You could be

36:20

feeling you know, shitty in a

36:20

relationship, maybe you're your

36:24

partner have just, you know,

36:24

committed adultery. You know,

36:30

there's a death and illness, you

36:30

know, something that's kind of

36:37

bumped you into your skin where

36:37

you've gone. Wow, okay, I can

36:42

kind of all that noise of

36:42

living, has just stepped back

36:46

because of this moment. And I

36:46

don't like what I feel or see

36:52

right now. And this doesn't feel

36:52

right. Yeah. So if you're in

36:56

those, if you're in that

36:56

situation, and you got a clear

37:00

path forward, then take that

37:00

clear path forward, take that

37:02

purposeful action, take that

37:02

uncomfortable action, if you

37:05

don't know, what is at the

37:05

bottom of that what's gnawing at

37:11

your spinal cord, or whatever.

37:11

And you need feel like you need

37:15

some support group support to do

37:15

that, then Apple's going to help

37:20

you find what root cause. And,

37:20

but that's not the only part of

37:29

this. And I often see people

37:29

finding what the issue is, and

37:34

then they leave the retreat, or

37:34

they leave the course, or they

37:38

leave the counseling and the

37:38

difference between where they

37:41

are in current reality. And this

37:41

vision plays so far, that didn't

37:45

have the pragmatic tools to be

37:45

able to move towards it. That's

37:49

why the 50% of the course 50% of

37:49

the retreat, is how do we now

37:54

manifest and take purposeful

37:54

action towards what this place

38:00

of enrichment looks like, so

38:00

that we can make pragmatic steps

38:05

that gives us the confidence to

38:05

continue. Because you know, the

38:10

stats around people joining the

38:10

gym at the beginning of the year

38:14

to New Year, I'm gonna get a

38:16

lot of weight,

38:18

going to eat

38:18

good, I'm going to admit it

38:21

drops off. Right. And it's

38:21

because that's just an it's a

38:26

notion doesn't have routine, it

38:26

doesn't have support, it doesn't

38:30

have awareness, it doesn't have

38:30

the pragmatics of incremental

38:36

progress towards because when

38:36

we're happy, we're on purpose,

38:42

making progress. So unhappy is

38:42

like this state that that clears

38:50

away pretty quickly. But we all

38:50

know when we're happy, aye, aye.

38:54

Aye, maybe move happy out of the

38:54

limelight and put enriched in

38:59

the limelight. Enrichment

38:59

provides us with like this

39:03

furnace of power to make

39:03

progress and every time we

39:09

enrich, and, you know, la Paul's

39:09

got this circle of enrichment,

39:14

1212 areas of enrichment. Every

39:14

time we make an investment in

39:20

one of those little units. It

39:20

powers the rest of the ring. And

39:27

identifying where you're over

39:27

investing potentially, and where

39:32

you're often under investing in

39:32

your circle Live in Richmond,

39:35

because the underinvestment

39:35

leaks energy. So if you're not

39:39

taking care of, you know, your

39:39

your you know, you're not

39:45

playing to your talents and

39:45

strength. You're kind of

39:49

compromising yourself you're

39:49

doing really hard and you've

39:51

vocation because you've said no

39:51

to being the artist or the

39:54

musician, or the accountant or

39:54

whatever it is, you know, being

39:58

good with numbers, whatever it

39:58

is, if you say Saying no to

40:00

that. And you're playing your

40:00

second fiddle, third fiddle that

40:04

leaks energy out of your circle

40:04

of enrichment. And if you say

40:08

yes to that, and I'm not saying

40:08

go out and become an accountant

40:11

tomorrow, or you know, try to be

40:11

steamed tomorrow or whatever,

40:15

but just recognizing that, by

40:15

investing in that you're saying

40:19

yes to your innate enrichment

40:19

circle, that then float the

40:24

energy circle. Because often

40:24

when people are going through

40:27

these experiences, they lose

40:27

energy and can't sleep,

40:30

constantly tired, low energy. So

40:30

for me the manifestation, the

40:35

second second part of the

40:35

retreat, that, you know, the the

40:40

two plus days of the second half

40:40

of the retreat is around how do

40:44

we manifest? And how do we put

40:44

in place the routines and the

40:48

checkpoints to allow us to be

40:48

supported to go forward? So the

40:52

guys end up with a body who has

40:52

got a vested interest in

40:59

supporting them, because it's

40:59

also reciprocated?

41:03

That's an important thing, isn't it in terms of getting support,

41:05

because a lot of people feel

41:08

very alone in their journeys.

41:08

And providing support is an

41:15

element that can help alleviate

41:15

some of that

41:18

mass

41:18

massively. I mean, you and I

41:20

share share a men's group rally,

41:20

we go to return up to men's

41:23

group every week, why don't we

41:23

do that? Because we're getting

41:26

support from men. And we, you

41:26

know, because knowing where we

41:31

need to go is one part of the

41:31

process. The second thing is

41:36

then making tracking, you know,

41:36

how are we tracking how we're

41:40

doing? And what are the

41:40

obstacles? Yeah, and who else

41:43

has got some help that might be

41:43

able to, and that's in, you

41:46

know, that that's incredibly

41:46

valuable. So if you're on an

41:49

evolutionary journey, and your

41:49

partner's not there with you,

41:52

firstly, get your partner there,

41:52

you know, have that conversation

41:55

that I had with Sonya. But even

41:55

without that, having, having a

42:01

journey partner who's come from

42:01

the retreat with the tools and

42:05

the orientation, and wants to

42:05

support you, and you want to

42:10

support them, it's a beautiful

42:10

unit, right? Absolutely.

42:13

Absolutely. And I think that,

42:13

you know, that that, for me is

42:16

going to be where a huge

42:16

potential is going to come from

42:21

this retreat. And I haven't seen

42:21

it done very well before.

42:25

Because it's, it's about having,

42:25

you know, it's about, you know,

42:30

the retreat person or the

42:30

counselor or whatever,

42:33

continuing to have to be paid in

42:33

that process. There's constant

42:36

energy that's being expended by

42:36

you, the participant. And I'm

42:40

going well, why don't we just

42:40

put together the two

42:42

participants, and they pay one

42:42

another with an energetic

42:46

exchange that helps both of

42:46

them? Absolutely. And if they

42:49

prove the model, that helps me

42:49

as well. So why wouldn't we

42:51

replicate that? Because it's

42:51

like a free energy model?

42:54

Absolutely.

42:54

Steven, look, I want to thank

42:56

you, I think our listeners can

42:56

see that you've got a lot of

42:59

passion behind what you're,

42:59

you're talking about here for

43:03

sure. And so I want to leave now

43:03

to have a bit of a break and go

43:10

to the next part, which is we're

43:10

going to be talking about a

43:13

little bit more in depth about

43:13

Laffel. And talking about your

43:17

isn't the 12 areas of law, Apple

43:17

and maybe go into that a bit

43:20

more. So, as I said in my first

43:20

episode, Stephens offering a

43:25

great discount of price for

43:25

beaming green listeners. So I

43:30

would encourage you to go to law

43:30

apple.com.au and register your

43:36

interest and mentioned that you

43:36

have listened to beaming grain,

43:39

and that you'd love to come or

43:39

register for the next one. And

43:44

then he's actually going to keep

43:44

you in, keep in touch with you

43:46

and give you a hopefully another

43:46

discount for the next one. If

43:51

you can't make this one, but it

43:51

is selling up fast. I hear.

43:54

There's a lot of people showing

43:54

interest. So stay tuned. You'll

43:58

find out more in episode three.

43:58

Thanks, Steven. Thanks. Thanks

44:07

for tuning in to beaming green.

44:07

Don't forget to check out our

44:11

YouTube channel at beaming

44:11

green.com And leave us a review

44:15

on your preferred podcast

44:15

platform or subscribe to us on

44:20

YouTube. And a special thanks to

44:20

Dave Weir, and to Roman Sanic

44:26

from Pixabay for producing some

44:26

amazing music. Keep living

44:31

green, and we'll see you next

44:31

time. Bye