0:00

Did they make that mast for

0:02

those saleships out of one tree trunk?

0:04

Was it one tree trunk or do you think they

0:06

built it to make sure its

0:08

integrity was more intense? I've

0:10

never thought about ships this way. I spent

0:12

all last weekend thinking about this and watching documentaries

0:14

on it. What do they call what you have?

0:17

Uh... Algorithm?

0:19

Oh, okay. Hey,

0:23

something's burning, something's burning,

0:26

something's burning. I understand

0:28

it. It's like, here's the deal. Are you rolling right

0:30

now? Yes. Good. Here's the

0:33

deal is that it's all enjoyable. You know,

0:35

we live in the part of the internet,

0:37

especially this show when I say wild stuff.

0:39

Probably not to you guys though, because I

0:41

also did traditional television. Uh-huh. But the

0:44

comedians are more... They

0:46

don't really care. You know,

0:48

and it's like, we've been saying fucked

0:51

up shit for 12 years. So there's

0:53

no putting the toothpaste back in the tube. But a show like

0:55

yours, even like you get big

0:57

guests and you're never gonna get Tom Hanks

0:59

if on last meals, if

1:02

he sees you say anything about anything. I

1:04

mean, you can't even... You can't

1:06

talk about the vaccine, the Capitol Stormers. You

1:08

can't talk about like anything. The issue seems

1:11

very complicated and I'm looking forward to hearing

1:13

what both sides have to say. I'm just

1:15

glad we can say fuck on this show.

1:17

Yeah. We don't say that. You can say

1:19

anything on this show. You can bleep it

1:21

out. Fuck, fuck, fuck,

1:24

fuck. That's what it's supposed to say. It's the first

1:26

one you know because then you lose funding or something. We

1:28

try to curse and then a bunch

1:30

of 10-year-olds wrote comments on like our

1:33

Apple podcast page saying, you

1:35

can't do this anymore. I can't listen.

1:37

My mommy won't let me listen. Please

1:39

bring back clean content. So... 10-year-old

1:41

Mormons are our key demo. Yeah. And so we're

1:43

really trying to hit that super hard this year.

1:45

Let's just let you... If you're a 10-year-old Mormon,

1:47

you're watching right now. So half of you are

1:49

gonna lose your religion. All right. Right

1:52

now. Let's do it. There's gonna be a big bunch of

1:54

you that start getting tatted up and doing drugs. Because of

1:56

the overbearing. The other 50% that stick

1:58

with the religion will be the most... wildest

2:00

lunatics you ever met. Mormons are fun as

2:02

fucking shit. I wish I got a Rumsprunga.

2:05

That's what- I was just about to talk

2:07

about that. Wait, you're a Jewish and Persian?

2:09

Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

2:11

You guys are pretty loose. Us?

2:13

No, our community is under a

2:16

microscope all the time. We're all

2:18

so insular and we all know

2:20

each other's bullshit. Oh yeah. So

2:22

it's very hard to branch out and live your

2:24

life without being judged. Give me

2:26

a Persian stereotype that I can

2:28

now, I

2:30

love good stereotypes. No, not like racist ones, but like

2:32

fun ones. It was like fun ones. I'll

2:37

give you a fun one. Anytime you

2:39

meet a Filipino person, they usually have the most

2:41

American fucking names you'll ever get. I used to

2:43

do one on stage. I'd be like, what's Filipino?

2:45

They always have the most American names. And they'd

2:47

be like, Joe. And that was like a fun

2:50

one, right? So give me a good Persian stereotype.

2:52

Like, hang on, are the Kardashians are not Persian?

2:54

They're a quarter Armenian. Yeah. So

2:57

Armenians and Persians are like cousins. So

3:00

we're very similar in that aspect. One Persian, you

3:02

want a Persian girl stereotype? Okay,

3:05

okay. This is gonna backfire what I'm getting my blood

3:07

drawn by a Persian nurse. And I go, so. Oh

3:09

my God, I got my blood drawn. And look at

3:11

all these bruises. Look at all these bruises. They don't know

3:14

how to find a vein apparently. Holy shit. That's

3:16

the bottom is. Persian girls love to

3:18

marry rich guys. I think that's all

3:20

women. Oh, really? Persian

3:22

girls more. We really love rich

3:24

men. Like, we always, like, we'll date guys

3:27

like the money doesn't matter and stuff. But

3:29

whenever you got your ring on your finger,

3:31

like, he's gotta be rich. I

3:33

noticed he's gotta be rich. It's really nice that his mom and

3:36

dad are rich too in case he loses money. So his mom

3:38

and dad's money comes into play. I love that. I

3:41

love that. What's your ethnic background? So I'm

3:43

like half white trash in Mallentown, Pennsylvania and

3:45

then half South African Jew. Oh,

3:48

yeah. When I want to. Josh

3:54

and Nicole from Mythical Kitchen. Thanks

3:57

so much for coming. Every time I say

3:59

mythical. I know a time when he starts

4:01

doing this for the rest of the day. Mythical.

4:04

So seriously. So

4:06

wait. Uh, due from

4:08

South Africa. Yes. Interesting.

4:11

Very. Very. And

4:13

then like Pennsylvania Dutch. So like kind of like Mennonite

4:15

cousins, like Lancaster County, but most of my family's in

4:17

Mennonite now. Like shakers and stuff? Like good cabinet maker?

4:19

Do you guys make a good rocking chair? Not

4:22

me particularly. Those are guys. Those are guys.

4:25

Dude, they fuck up rocking chairs. Mennonites.

4:28

The shakers. You're setting a little. You

4:30

guys should know this. You guys should know this in

4:32

a kitchen. Mennonites

4:35

make the best cabinets in the fucking world.

4:38

I believe you. I don't know if that's

4:40

actually factual, but it's kind of like more

4:42

than that. We're woodworking. Yeah. Yeah.

4:45

They raise barns. They do all that. They build houses.

4:47

They build houses. In the great pies, but also there's

4:49

the split like in Mormont where you have, you know,

4:52

the Mormont that stay there and then you got the

4:54

ones that leave. So all of my Mennonite cousins were

4:56

like the small time crooks. Like all

4:58

the fun stories my dad told about his uncles

5:00

were just like, yeah, they like stole a police

5:02

scanner and they would like wait for crimes and

5:04

then they would go impersonate police and shake people

5:06

down for bribes and then leave. Isn't that fun?

5:09

And I'm like, yeah, it kind of is. Police

5:11

scanners were so fucking fun when I was in

5:13

college because you could eavesdrop on people. This

5:16

sounds like a crime now that I'm saying it. No.

5:18

I knew what I was going to say. You ever tell stories

5:20

about your childhood? You're like, huh, maybe we'll

5:23

share that one. But you could go out and you

5:25

could listen to like get

5:27

in front of a sorority house and just go. Hey,

5:31

does anyone know what Kimberly? You go, I know. It

5:33

was crazy. Anyway, how did you

5:35

guys meet? At work. She's

5:38

leading them to my DMs. Yeah. So

5:41

I was I was like watching the show because I'm a

5:43

fan of GMM and I would watch it every single day.

5:45

And then I was like, you know what? I

5:47

can do exactly what this guy does,

5:50

but probably better. She did say that. So

5:52

I DM him and then I and then you gave

5:54

me your email and then I emailed you my resume.

5:56

Yeah, I forced him to give me a job. And

6:00

then naturally we became co-workers. The only

6:02

other person that interviewed for that job

6:05

inappropriately touched me and made sexual advances during the interview.

6:07

That is a real thing. I did not do that.

6:10

In my DM, I won that job interview where

6:12

you hit on me? Yeah, no, he was like,

6:14

oh my god, that was long. Oh, the dude?

6:16

Yeah, that was, yeah. Never mind. He was cute

6:18

though, but no, he was like, oh my god,

6:20

in those arms, he starts touching me. I'm like,

6:22

what? Oh wait, that's something I would do. That's

6:24

something I would do. Fair enough. I found out

6:26

the hard way you could sexually harass dudes. I

6:30

thought it was just a one way street that

6:32

you could sexually harass women, so you don't do

6:34

that. But then I was joking sexually harassed dudes,

6:36

thinking it was a joke. And then at

6:39

one point someone was like, I think they think you want to

6:41

fuck them. I was like, no, it's a joke. And they're like,

6:43

yeah, not the way you're saying it. And I was like, uh-oh.

6:45

So I had to stop. You are from the old internet. I

6:47

like it. No. Oh yeah, I was making TV, I made TV

6:49

shows. You guys never got

6:51

into that. I made TV shows. Wow. I

6:54

had shows where I had to promote, this is insane to say,

6:57

no. I

6:59

was like, tune in Thursday night at eight o'clock, eastern,

7:01

seven central. No one

7:03

does that now. No one does that. No, please,

7:06

internet. And I don't blame it. Because I go

7:08

until, I mean, literally, I look at what

7:10

you guys make, and you're a part of

7:12

a large umbrella. But like, and

7:15

I get lost, and I just scroll, and I watch

7:17

all of it. I watch fucking all of it. Last

7:20

Meals is just

7:23

such a brilliant. Dude, hell yeah. You love a good

7:25

idea. And

7:28

what I love about YouTube, what I think is gonna

7:30

be perfect synergism,

7:34

synergy for today. It's on the jet. And

7:37

is, I don't know what

7:39

the fuck we're making. Let's

7:41

go. Is it mystery basket time? So what

7:44

I have is a ton of ingredients. I

7:46

have a ton of ingredients, and I would

7:48

like you guys to pick the meal we

7:50

cook. Oh, God. With all the ingredients. With

7:53

all the ingredients. I have fucking everything. I

7:55

have meal, I have pork, I have shrimp,

7:57

I have ground beef, I have steak. which

8:00

I'm a fucking huge steak fan but it's

8:02

up to you. I've got everything we can

8:05

to make whatever you guys come up with

8:07

because this is your specialty really. You guys

8:09

know your way around the kitchen and

8:11

I don't so I've got all the

8:13

peppers I've got everything so I thought

8:15

what I'd do is let you

8:17

guys take a second take a look at what we

8:19

have brainstorm together and then I'll start cooking you tell

8:21

me what to cook I'll cook it. Do you want

8:23

to break out the present? Yeah we brought you something

8:25

special. Please be perfect. No

8:28

no no those are the

8:30

ones. Okay we brought you a present

8:32

and I really want you to incorporate this

8:35

in our dish. Okay. So it's a white

8:37

albatrossal imported from

8:39

Italy? Yeah yeah from the north

8:41

of Italy. Okay this is gonna piss me off.

8:43

They've already made my show so much better. You're

8:45

welcome. You guys came up and set my game

8:47

up and now people are gonna watch my show

8:49

and go why will we ever watch a bird

8:51

show when they have something. You've gotta get huffed

8:54

man just like the jank of the old days.

8:56

Fuck that's good. And then what you can

8:58

do with a leftover rice is make a truffle

9:00

scented risotto. We

9:02

could do that right now with your rice. We could do that. I

9:06

mean I have thoughts about the protein seeing as

9:08

we're in the uncancellable part of the internet. One

9:11

two three. Veal! Let's go culture

9:13

baby cow! I didn't know that's

9:15

what they were for a long time. So let's do

9:17

Veal. Let's do Veal.

9:20

We're gonna get rid of all this. What

9:23

is that? A little pork blade chop. You

9:26

guys are good. It's from Japan. Oh

9:29

shit. Corobuda? Corobuda

9:31

is the Japanese term for a Berkshire pig.

9:34

God you guys know your shit. Let me

9:36

put this, what do they call it? Ground

9:38

beef. Wait man can I grab a drink

9:40

from you? That'd be really good. What do

9:42

you want? What do you want? Cocktails? Cocktails?

9:44

We can't get careful with cocktails? Cocktails please.

9:46

I love it. Let's get loaded and say

9:48

wild shit about Gwyneth Paltrow. That'd be fantastic.

9:50

I fucking like Gwyneth Paltrow.

9:53

Have you, do you eat goop? Are you a goop man? I

9:55

don't put stones in my pussy if that's what you're

9:57

talking about. Have you tried? I don't have. I

10:00

would definitely put a stone up my ass. I'm afraid I'd

10:02

lose it. That's fair. You got a touch of string of

10:04

junk on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good, I'm glad. Yeah, without

10:06

a base, without a base. You know the goop, her

10:08

restaurant, where she makes these like macrobiotic meals? No,

10:10

but I would. I believe her, okay?

10:13

I believe her. Yeah. Like, I'm

10:16

a, so, okay. I fell in love with celebrity, like

10:18

when, like, I didn't understand celebrity. You know, it was

10:20

like when we were kids, you got Harrison Ford, you

10:22

got Mark Hamill, you got all your like, all your,

10:24

your grounded, OG celebrities, Tom Hanks,

10:26

all of them, those were your, you know, they were given

10:28

to you by Hollywood, and

10:31

then when I moved out to LA, it

10:33

was the last bastion of gifted celebrities,

10:35

Betafleck, Matt Damon, Gwyneth Paltrow, Winona Ryder,

10:37

Johnny Depp, all these guys started popping

10:39

up really big, and those, I bought

10:41

into those. Those are my, that's my

10:43

team, that's my, those are

10:46

my heroes a little bit, and Gwyneth Paltrow just

10:48

has, there's such a, for

10:51

lack of better words, a down-home

10:53

sexiness to her. Her, Angie Harmon,

10:55

there's so many like, fucking

10:58

Jennifer Garner, just really fucking cool, and

11:00

when she went, you know, I guess

11:02

off the reservation and decided to start

11:04

fucking doing all the wild shit, I

11:06

listened, I listened to all of it. Dude, I brushed

11:09

myself with one of the fucking brushes and I saw

11:11

it all the time, so I came out red as

11:13

fuck, and it was not a great idea, but

11:15

I'm a Gwyneth Paltrow fan. I

11:18

hear a lot of what you're saying, it

11:20

was the celery juice cures cancer because of

11:22

a guy who talks to ghosts. That was

11:24

a thing that was on goo, but is

11:26

it as crazy as a seven-day water fast

11:29

or morning sunlight or polar plunges or saunas

11:31

where all the shit we're hearing now? Not

11:33

really. Is a ghost to tell the man

11:35

that celery juice cures cancer? Yeah, Bert, that

11:37

is crazier than your cold plunge. I have

11:39

not seen Ebony of the Scrooge and Christmas

11:41

Carol. That's how you turn into a good

11:44

guy. Ghosts do, I

11:46

believe in ghosts. I believe in fucking ghosts, by the

11:48

way, I am this ghost becoming a phytologist. Yeah,

11:51

wait. That's not fun. Somebody save him. We

11:53

found Elrond Hubbard's Boulevard the other day. It's

11:55

right by, what's the restaurant that we like?

11:57

The one. Oh, Saffee's. It's right by

11:59

Saffee's. I deliberately walked slowly down there

12:01

just like bait. I wanted to get approached.

12:04

I wanted to get lured in there Were

12:06

you wearing a put-up shirt? No, that's where

12:08

I went. Yeah, I don't

12:10

know. I want to believe in something, right? I have

12:12

nothing This

12:15

is the foundation of my life. I want to

12:17

believe in something. Why wouldn't you? Why doesn't everyone

12:19

wants to believe in something for some people's fitness,

12:22

you know for some people for some people?

12:24

It's music, you know They find

12:26

their band like they tore the dead with fish or

12:28

with goose They fall in love with the band and

12:30

that's their thing It's not crazy to

12:32

say that you believe in an

12:34

afterlife you believe in God I would love to

12:36

tether myself and I gotta be honest with you

12:39

the Scientology. I actually believe in aliens So

12:41

like they could get me easy. Yeah, and

12:43

especially if they give me a little fucking

12:45

VIP treatment They're like, yo, you got a

12:47

big s-gram following you don't have to do

12:49

the other shit that boards do you just

12:51

come straight? Monitor a couple things,

12:54

you know An

12:56

emitter test I have you taking one. No, no, that's when

12:58

they get me. Wait, hold on. This is not the a

13:00

problem No, I took one in college. They

13:03

were tabling. I went to UCSB It was the last day

13:05

of finals and I took a final

13:07

a little bit drunk because I was like I got oceanography

13:09

in the bag Baby, I've been in my ocean Nicole. I've

13:11

been to the fucking ocean. I know it And

13:14

so yeah, I got a B in that killed

13:16

it and then I was getting home and there

13:18

was a Scientologist like Tableing outside and he just

13:20

comes up to me goes Do

13:22

you get sad sometimes? Okay, fuck and I look

13:24

around I see the book Dianetics and I go.

13:26

Oh Yes, I do

13:28

and I sat down in his chair and he

13:30

hooked me up to it Looks like a Geiger

13:32

counter with two relay batons attached to it Okay,

13:34

and you'll hold it and he goes think bad

13:36

thoughts and I go no problem I Release

13:46

it and he goes I know think good thoughts and I close

13:48

my eyes and it goes playing right to the same fucking side

13:50

He goes Wow, man, you really messed up. You should probably take

13:52

our course That

13:56

was it but fuck that was my answer to Scientology

13:58

why I think it's done and you go, so my

14:01

bad thought, are you wearing underwear? I go, whoa. All

14:04

right, so what are we gonna do with these veal tops? So

14:06

do you want us to help? I want you to tell

14:08

me everything. Okay, got it, got it, got it. Should we go look at

14:10

the veal? Yeah, yeah, yeah, please. Take a look, open my fridge. What

14:14

kind of drinks do you guys want? Oh, God,

14:16

what do you guys want? Absolutely fucking everything. This

14:19

show is sponsored by DraftKings. Hey,

14:21

Hoops enthusiasts. It's that time

14:23

of year. The NBA season is in

14:25

full swing from buzzer beaters to jaw-dropping

14:27

dunks. This season is all fire. I

14:30

have partnered up with DraftKings to get

14:33

you right in on the action. Discover

14:35

the excitement of real-time betting by downloading

14:37

the DraftKings app now. New customers get

14:40

a no sweat bet. Get a

14:42

bonus bet back up to $1,000 in

14:44

the amount of your original bet. If it doesn't hit,

14:47

minimum deposit of $5. Sign

14:49

up using my promo code burning, the

14:51

crown is yours. That's right. New

14:53

customers get a no sweat bet up to

14:55

1K if your first bet

14:57

loses and DraftKings got something

15:00

for the existing customer as well.

15:02

All customers get SGP insurance every

15:04

day. Get a bonus bet back

15:06

if one leg of your SGP

15:08

loses, minimum number of legs required

15:10

and max bet vary. If

15:13

sports betting not yet available in your state,

15:15

don't worry, you can still join in on

15:17

all the fun with DraftKings daily fantasy and

15:19

have a shot to

15:21

win cash prizes. Download the DraftKings

15:23

Sportsbook app now. New customers use

15:25

my promo code burning and get

15:27

a no sweat bet. That's my

15:29

promo code burning at DraftKings Sportsbook.

15:32

Don't miss out on the action this

15:34

week at DraftKings. Download the DraftKings app

15:36

today. Sign up using dkng.co. slash

15:40

burning or through my promo code

15:42

burning. Gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER or

15:45

visit 1-800-gambler.net. In New

15:47

York, call 877-8OPEN-WIRE. Text

15:49

HOPEN-Y467369. In

15:51

Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-779-7777 or

15:54

visit ccpg.org. Please

15:58

play responsibly. On behalf of the SGP, Boot Hill

16:00

Casino and Resort in Kansas 21 and

16:03

over age varies by jurisdiction Boyd in

16:05

Ontario bonus bets expire 168 hours after

16:07

issuance see dkng.com/football for eligibility and deposit

16:09

restrictions terms and responsible gaming resources. Alright

16:12

so um first little aperty of little

16:14

caffeine to get it going I think

16:16

we're just gonna drink Woodford Reserve in

16:19

Mr. Black equal parts on the rocks.

16:22

Should we do Josh hear me out I

16:24

kind of want to do like a like

16:26

a banked out feel. Yeah leave it

16:28

on the bone. Yeah leave it

16:30

on the bone but I also want to

16:32

do like Thai flavors like basil mint lemon

16:34

glass. Well aren't we doing risotto? We can

16:36

throw that. We can do I say

16:38

we make them yeah we are doing risotto but

16:40

I kind of wanted to put some some

16:43

Thai Vietnamese flavors in there. You have a

16:45

spoon. Yeah right here. Yeah thank you.

16:49

Deconstructed white Russian. Okay.

16:51

Deconstructed white Russian. Cheers. Hey thank you guys for

16:53

coming on the show. Thanks for having me. This

16:55

is rules. Oh

16:59

fuck. Yeah. Oh

17:01

baby. The tongue it just tastes so good.

17:04

The tongue I get the back of my

17:06

brain. It's gonna be okay. It's gonna work

17:08

out. The thing you said to the cashier

17:10

30 minutes ago wasn't fucked up. Alright

17:16

so you want to just set me up to succeed?

17:19

I want to set you up for success here. Yeah but

17:21

Josh how do you feel about my idea? I don't want

17:23

to just like take over the whole thing. Was this

17:25

fucking lemongrass bar? Yeah it's a basil mint

17:27

lemongrass bar. They were leaving us. Yeah. Okay

17:29

and then. You have to press limes anywhere?

17:31

I'm sure we do. I drink

17:33

a lot. What are the

17:35

odds we have limes? Here's no that's a tomato. There's

17:37

limes in there? Where's there's. We already have one at

17:39

the store so you can go back to limes. Oh

17:42

where's the limes at? No I said there's

17:44

no limes. Oh there's no limes. Let's see.

17:46

Let's see if we have some of these. Oh

17:49

Toronto peppers. I love peppers. You

17:51

two. I love spices. You spicy guys? I mean

17:53

I've seen you on hot ones obviously but. Yeah.

17:56

I'll tell you what I fucked my stomach up.

17:58

I had the world's hottest pepper. Oh

18:01

man and I to have in the field

18:03

where I couldn't really like I just wasn't

18:05

a pepper feel my to come by and

18:07

oh nuts and it and I had a

18:09

problem starting that day. This continued and so

18:11

what I do. As I said it's my

18:13

wife this morning I said why do I

18:15

do like yes are many matheson words of

18:17

eating healthy meals of of life is it.

18:19

There's chef and they cut out here So

18:21

sexy and how does one about my mouth

18:23

and I'm in the Mill The night I

18:25

woke up to shitting rocket fuel and I

18:27

was like gonna love spicy stuff. I love

18:29

drinking and it doesn't serve me. But I

18:31

fucking love it. Same and I love the

18:33

things that kill me. I think you know,

18:35

like I love state a lot of things.

18:39

I'm A. I'm A. I'm A. I'm A. I'm A. I'm

18:41

a slave to my once. You know, so do

18:43

we do. And tell me what were we need? Okay, So

18:46

I think we said how the sell

18:48

it and then marinate it with lime

18:50

juice. Some. Doesn't at home? Yeah.

18:52

To have said. Yes!

18:55

Whose music Coming from my headphones? I

18:57

looked over you listening to. The

19:00

album Mafia by Black Label Society

19:02

to doesn't six early album was

19:05

hundred sixty days me here hi

19:07

mom engage seem like a very

19:09

very much at this terms mess

19:11

up Luckily we we we use

19:13

a job you're Jewish American princess

19:15

he or she right now. I.

19:19

Started off as you by Isis is

19:21

a princess. negotiations like I'm like Long

19:23

Island, You like former cheerleader Euros? the

19:26

Miami News or minus. Oh he smartest.

19:28

Fuck yea I know she's super smart

19:30

as I am. It is there any

19:32

way that his hands. Tied him

19:34

from over there, Are

19:37

not your Of course he gets

19:39

up and move around so at

19:41

school colors state. So. We weren't

19:43

Miami fans but then I went into the

19:45

show a Universal Miami and I was so

19:48

fucking impressed by those. Me and I hated

19:50

them for so long with how the South

19:52

yeah founded on and then we need to

19:54

put him in for something or tall about

19:56

the cyber bullied for either I like three

19:58

hundred gallons of lot or even like last

20:00

to grab it. right?

20:04

Don't. Have like I was ready to couldn't see. This young

20:06

lady exists I feel is enough minority

20:08

Like: very like Goody Goody Two Shoes

20:10

doesn't listen the heavy music or whatever

20:12

like I'm a get that the myself

20:14

or the showed one. when Justin the

20:16

said there is thinning that bet. Well,

20:20

they didn't read. are you going to

20:22

death and with them and they are

20:25

pretty strong. A dental hum hum of

20:27

I'm you know of. I've learned the

20:29

wrong way. help or pounded too hard

20:31

times a day where you just eviscerated.

20:33

but the think that's good right there.

20:35

Yeah, I'm. Not even gonna do

20:37

not want any other side. There's something

20:39

about people who drink in the afternoon

20:41

together. Where is? It's probably the most

20:43

American thing you can do is like

20:45

that's how the civil or not Civil

20:47

War. Be bummed the Revolutionary War started

20:50

disappointed is drinking or in this is

20:52

fucked up to repay darkness? That's the

20:54

number. Of

20:56

uses a motors probably started though you know

20:58

Muslim most more Israelis are want to do

21:01

just fucked up bringing your my that sucks

21:03

man yells on service how the capital Stormer

21:05

started yelling. Like I'm Sarah The capital

21:07

Story started with a shot a

21:09

fireball at eight am either like

21:11

do was say I saw a

21:14

President of food and it is

21:16

hop and computer cleaner like lingering

21:18

after losing. Okay, to be real,

21:20

you're at the capitol, you're drinking

21:22

pretty heavily. And.

21:24

Arrows are going that direction. Are you

21:26

the person? Who. Steps back or are

21:28

you the person that take steps forward

21:30

Because that's the thing that I am

21:33

hung up on is that like so

21:35

many people just want to get closer

21:37

to see what was going on or

21:39

but that's what exactly we're Japanese dormer

21:41

cases in Western new laws in this

21:43

and be real in history. Worried

21:45

because my dad was. We.

21:47

Always the right person or a side of the fence

21:50

of history. That's. Too fucked up

21:52

things on big history buff and he was.

21:55

You. know the people that changed russia

21:57

the people basically know that the

22:00

Mussolini like you watch the right side of history

22:02

at times and the wrong sides and

22:04

I'm always fascinated about what would I do

22:06

in those situations am I a good person

22:08

for real am I a good person because

22:10

everyone says they are when they leave comments

22:12

on the internet for when push comes to

22:14

shove do you join

22:17

World War two do you join just like

22:19

all the other kids that are 18 ago that does

22:21

it we're gonna they did this Pearl Harbor we're going

22:23

after do you remember where I said my family was

22:25

from not the Pennsylvania one but the other one yeah

22:28

what country is that Oh

22:30

South Africa we'll

22:32

leave it at that not my father's

22:36

I am not my grandparents I'd like to

22:38

think that I'm on the right side and

22:40

I'd like to think that I'm not sure

22:42

I have to just go look you lose

22:44

that shit going on but also I mean

22:46

when the crowd moves I know maybe

22:48

yeah you guys are like

22:54

hey can you guys end up the capital storming

22:57

party no the capital storming say all right so

22:59

these are founded pretty good correct solid man yeah

23:01

and then what do I want to cover them

23:03

in what do you do we do like flour

23:05

shallow pan fryer do we just want like you

23:07

want to marinate it you don't think we should

23:09

marinate it yeah yeah yeah yeah in a separate

23:12

bowl you're gonna grab your

23:19

you're gonna grab some salt so sure

23:21

salt sugar you're gonna cut up your

23:23

aromatics you're gonna bang up your lemongrass

23:26

bang up my leg lemongrass no

23:29

lemongrass yeah smack the fuck out of it oh

23:31

wow I smell it immediately Annalise

23:46

our producer who grew up very evangelical Christian was like

23:48

for the first year that I knew you and Nicole

23:50

I thought you hated each other because you were always

23:52

fighting and I was like we really

23:54

never fight no I never fall with the ones

23:56

and then I actually listened to us talk and

23:58

I was like oh fuck I feel like we're fighting

24:00

all the time. No. Is it really?

24:02

A delicate evangelical year, of course. I

24:06

think we talk each over each other. What are

24:08

we pouring in here? What

24:10

else should we pour? We don't

24:12

have limes. We could do lemons. Lemons? Just cut

24:14

a lemon and throw it in there. Can

24:17

I just eat those olives? Please. That'd be huge for me.

24:19

Yeah, please. Lemons, and then

24:21

take your other aromatics, like your mint and

24:23

your basil as well. I'm just

24:25

going to take my tea. Thank you so much.

24:28

This is fun. I'm

24:32

a knife whore. He told me not. He's a

24:34

knife whore. He's a knife whore? You get

24:36

paid? He's a whore for knives. I don't. Because

24:39

I love knives, so I just take knives sponsorships. And

24:41

I shout them out. Yeah, I just love

24:43

knives. What country makes your favorite knife? America.

24:46

You like American knives? My favorite knife is the

24:48

Spyderco knife. Right now, it's my Spyderco knife. They're

24:50

made out of golden Colorado. And I love their

24:52

pocket knives. And then I found out they had

24:54

culinary knives. And I was like, fuck.

24:56

Their edges are so sharp, they last forever. And it's

24:59

Spyderco's looking for other people to sponsor. You know they're

25:01

going to go straight to you. Why would they stick

25:03

around with me? Because you guys can really cook. You

25:05

can't even fucking cook. You see them count up that

25:07

real nice guy's ass. Give me the knife. So

25:10

now do we put sugar, salt, lemon, lemongrass.

25:12

You got basil and mint. Throw it in

25:14

there too. Basil and mint. Can

25:16

we chop up the mint? I think you just break

25:18

it up with your hands. You want to use just a stem? I've

25:20

got to express it. You've got to take the knife. I was going

25:23

to say that too. Well, you say it. Just smack

25:25

it in your hands for real. Yeah, so bartenders do that to get the...

25:27

Aromas out. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

25:29

Basil in here. Can we chop the

25:32

basil? Express

25:34

it the same way, but also leave some for garnish please. Thank you. Wait,

25:37

can we leave any mint? Yeah, we left

25:39

mint and basil for garnish. By

25:41

the way, you will hear me cooking like this.

25:44

Don't come downstairs. Mom and I are cooking. I

25:47

love that. That might

25:49

be my new favorite thing. Chanel we've got. Okay, nice.

25:52

What else should we add? That's the best show ever. I know, I'm having

25:55

so much fun. Especially when you walk here. I've got to figure out how

25:57

to get out of here. I'll

26:00

drive you back. So now I put these in? Yeah, throw them in

26:02

there. And give them a little love? And then give them a little

26:04

yig-zag. I'm gonna go on an adventure after this. Buddy?

26:08

You're going to Panorama City, man. A pub

26:10

crawl with a little buzz in LA is

26:12

one of my favorite things in the world.

26:15

Did you know that nearly 75% of

26:17

people have subscriptions they've forgotten about before I

26:19

started using Rocket Money? I

26:22

swear to God I thought five subscriptions. I'm

26:24

not even joking. Maybe top ten. I

26:27

could not believe when they showed

26:29

me. I was paying for over 30 subscriptions a month.

26:32

Between streaming services, fitness apps, and

26:34

delivery services, it was never

26:36

ending. Thanks to Rocket Money, I am no

26:39

longer wasting money on all the apps I

26:41

forgot about. Rocket Money is a personal finance

26:43

app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions,

26:46

monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills

26:48

so you can grow your savings. Your savings.

26:51

Your savings. That's your money. You should save

26:53

it. You shouldn't be wasting it every month.

26:55

Rocket Money has over five million users and

26:57

has saved a total of $500 million in

27:01

canceled subscriptions, saving members up to

27:03

$740 a year when using all

27:05

the apps features. Take it from me.

27:08

Stop wasting money on things you don't use, like me. Cancel

27:11

your unwanted subscriptions by going to

27:13

rocketmoney.com/burning. That's

27:15

rocketmoney.com/burning. rocketmoney.com/burning.

27:17

We let these sit for a second. Let

27:19

them hang out for a second. Okay, and

27:21

now what? Tell me what. Now, should he

27:24

do his own? What do you want him to do? I think

27:26

you're a photo man. I feel like I

27:28

am watching a TikTok live stream and telling

27:30

you what to do. I love it. And

27:32

I feel very powerful right now. You'd be shocked

27:34

where my limits are and where they aren't. Great.

27:38

I'm excited. What are your hard limits? Like

27:40

I almost kissed Matty Matheson's yesterday because he was

27:42

saying that he had kissed a dude and I

27:44

had. And then I know so many dudes who've

27:46

kissed dudes that I felt like, how have I...

27:48

Yeah, of course I have. Like me? Yeah.

27:52

Really? Okay. I'm an old school

27:54

buddy in college. I'm not going to name him. He's

27:56

great. No name it. I'm cutting

27:58

it. No name it. in his

28:00

office going, don't say it, don't fucking say it. So

28:04

risotto. Okay risotto, so you're gonna, I think

28:06

you should chop up some shallot and some garlic.

28:09

I got shallot and garlic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So

28:11

just chop that up nice and fine. These are women's

28:13

glasses. They

28:16

look beautiful. They look good. Very

28:18

good, very nice. And

28:21

then also do the same with garlic. I think if you

28:23

chop up a garlic, cool over too. You

28:25

got the finger tuck though, man. You're working like

28:28

a chef. I have worked

28:30

with enough chefs that I kind of stolen from

28:32

them. And you know, I used to be on

28:34

television when like celebrated chefs were

28:36

the shit. This is beautiful. Very

28:39

nice knife cut chef. Thank you.

28:41

So we've got shallots, we've got

28:43

garlic. Okay, let's get you

28:46

two pans. Let's get a pot in a pan. A

28:48

pot? A pot in a pan and

28:50

then a ladle. They really used to piss in their pots. Where

28:54

did that come from? A pot like having a pot to piss in. We

28:57

had chamber pots, surely. Yeah,

29:01

that makes sense. My, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh,

29:03

these fucking, what is the name of this

29:05

sponsor? The fucking Hexclad?

29:08

Everything in here is sponsored? Yeah.

29:10

We don't have shit sponsored, man. We

29:13

got nuts.com, we love nuts.com.

29:15

We love nuts.com. Nuts.com's fucking

29:17

legit. Nuts.com's fucking legit. They

29:20

might be sponsoring this podcast. Dude, I hope they

29:22

do. They just reached out, they saw my weight

29:24

loss and they're like, yo man, I know your

29:26

keto, you've been carnivore, let's hook you up with

29:28

some nuts. And I was like, bro, like it's

29:30

my first night in prison hooking up with nuts.

29:32

No bullshit, like best nuts I've

29:34

ever fucking had. The cashews are like double

29:36

the size of normally just fucking unreal. Yeah,

29:39

it's, you know, when you do

29:41

something like that, that's kind of avant

29:43

garde, you know, like just deal with nuts. You

29:46

can give an opportunity for a lot of white space to

29:48

do things right. Let's see, avant garde I

29:51

feel like. If they're doing nuts or everything. It's more

29:53

like niche. Niche, avant garde. I don't use the right

29:55

word a lot of times. That's all right. I was

29:57

misusing salt of the earth for a very long time.

30:00

What is salt of the earth? I thought it meant poor people. It's

30:03

like not far away. Salt of the earth, it

30:05

means, you know, it's like virtuous in the way

30:07

that a poor person would be, right? I was

30:09

like, they got on the subway and these guys

30:11

are salt of the earth. Oh, you meant like

30:13

that. Like you were doing a piece of shit.

30:15

Yeah. And they were like... Oh,

30:18

it was not a compliment. I was in the room

30:20

and they were like, I don't think you're using that

30:22

right. I've always said intensive purposes. Yeah. And

30:25

that's not right. What is it?

30:27

Intense and... Intense and purposes. I

30:30

just learned something new today. I think a lot of

30:32

people just did. I could go,

30:34

can I tell you, this is where I get

30:36

obsessed. When

30:38

they were building ships in the 1300s. Okay.

30:41

And now you gotta remember all the forests are there.

30:43

No one has started cutting down trees. No one's cutting

30:45

down trees. Did they make that mast

30:48

for those sail ships out of one

30:50

tree trunk? Was it one tree trunk or do you

30:52

think they built it to make

30:54

sure its integrity was more intense? I've

30:56

never thought about ships this way. Spent

30:59

all last weekend thinking about this and watching documentaries

31:01

on it. What do they call what you have?

31:04

Uhhhhhhh... Oh apparently I didn't

31:06

know that one. I have a few of

31:08

them. I got a fewisms. Wait,

31:12

wait, the mast, there's no way it was one

31:14

fucking tree, right? They had to compile a tunnel.

31:16

How do you know that? How do you know

31:18

that? I just, I don't believe they could find

31:20

enough trees of that. It's the 1300s. Sure.

31:23

All the trees are there. Always the trees there.

31:25

Yeah, they're the pretty little. And from when the

31:27

dinosaurs roamed, those trees are still there. So

31:30

they have every fucking tree. Let me tell you

31:32

something that's blowing your fucking mind. These are ships

31:34

that are roughly six basketball courts big and

31:36

they would get one piece of wood to

31:39

run all the way across down the thing.

31:42

And every now and then they'd have to patch it up that they

31:44

would take one piece of wood. I

31:46

could even, he wouldn't even know something crazier.

31:49

In World War II, because of

31:51

the way they were building ships, they made the

31:53

aircraft carriers, the decks were wooden for

31:56

a period of time. And then they realized the bombs go right

31:58

through them. So they had to put steel on them. and steal

32:00

all of them and realize, shit, now these ships are top

32:02

heavy. We can't retrofit all these ships. We're gonna have to

32:04

rebuild all our fucking ships. This

32:06

is all because, I was curious, did

32:09

they use one tree trunk? And the

32:11

answer is yes, it was one fucking

32:13

tree trunk. Do you know what the

32:15

first talk lick that used airplanes for

32:17

combat was? Give me a second. Ah.

32:20

Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. I

32:24

think we got the same, whatever's wrong with us, I think we

32:26

got the same one. I know this answer, I know this answer.

32:28

It's like, it's a little obscure. I

32:30

know this answer. I know this answer. I

32:32

know that World War II, George Bush's dad was

32:35

an airplane pilot, and that was when the Air

32:37

Force was created. Yeah. And

32:40

that's when like most fucking airports around the

32:42

world were created, so they were like, oh

32:44

shit, we need to land planes to transport

32:47

troops. And so that's when all these airports

32:49

were started creating all these airfields. But World

32:51

War I had planes. Yeah, I, wait. It

32:53

was before that. It was, yeah, so I'm

32:55

trying to think what wars

32:57

before World War I, you've

33:00

got, fuck.

33:05

It gets murky. It's like in that murky fucking area. It

33:07

could've been a civil war. Couldn't

33:09

have been a civil war. It was in the 1900s. So

33:11

it's like, there's a, but that's the point,

33:13

it was like there were like the depressions

33:16

were being belligerent, you know, the Japanese were

33:18

coming out of like the, what do they

33:20

call it? The, no, the, the

33:22

Edo period. The Edo period. The Edo period into

33:24

the, what's the expansion called? I

33:27

can't tell you Josh, I'm sorry. I don't have time. I get,

33:29

I get, I get, I get, I get a little,

33:31

little like, kind of

33:33

weird injustices. So one of the injustices

33:35

that I, I tethered to. This

33:38

is not an injustice. It's a horrible thing, but so

33:41

Japan conquered Korea. And

33:44

then they were like, yo, cool, we'll just take Korea. And

33:47

all the white countries are like, no, you're

33:49

not white. You can't take a country. We'll

33:52

take Korea. What

33:54

the fuck are you guys thinking? And

33:56

then, and then everyone's like, well, hold on, what

33:58

the fuck? Give me the Russians. You

34:01

know the Russians were in the Dark Ages up until like the

34:03

fucking 1900s. Like they

34:05

didn't, the Dark Ages, then Zhar Peter,

34:07

it was like, it was like

34:09

fucking, it was like Game of Thrones back then.

34:11

Like they didn't have fucking medicine. I mean, it

34:13

was crazy. By the way, do not use this

34:16

as a history podcast. Wait, no, I feel like

34:18

the people need to know. I'm

34:20

obsessed with history and I don't know why. What

34:24

do I wanna do? Tell him the-

34:26

Oh, the Italian-Libyan war. Basically,

34:29

Italy was like, yo, we've been left out

34:31

of like all of the colonization of Africa,

34:33

all the colonization of Southeast Asia. We gotta

34:36

fucking take something. And so they were like,

34:38

Libya, you're right there. You are

34:40

right there. Libya is right fucking there. It's right fucking

34:42

there. And they were like, we just figured out how

34:44

to make our cars go in the air and we're

34:46

gonna fucking throw bombs at your ass out of them.

34:49

And so it was the first, this airplane was invented like

34:51

a year before. They were just like, okay. You know the

34:53

Libyans had to be like, what the fuck did we do?

34:55

And they're like, no, all the way people are taking shit,

34:57

we're taking you. Straight up, yeah. Dude, you wanna know something

34:59

crazy? I learned this today. So

35:02

the British Empire starts getting fucking smoked by the Germans

35:04

in the beginning of World War II. And

35:06

their fucking team's like, hold on, hold on. We

35:09

have millions of soldiers in

35:11

India, all our places,

35:13

send them over. So the Indians come over without

35:16

shoes. They're like, they're like, they

35:18

should have been out shoes. And they're like, ah, you're not

35:20

fucking ready to fight with us? I

35:22

saw the video. The Indian army literally was

35:25

in shorts and a T-shirt with a helmet

35:27

on. Oh, fuck. No way. The

35:29

best thing on the internet right now is

35:31

on Netflix, World War II in color. I'm

35:34

obsessed with it. I'm obsessed with

35:36

it. And if I get high watching it,

35:38

I'll cry. Like it's so,

35:41

you're watching dudes, you're watching ships sink,

35:43

you're watching dudes jump into the water,

35:45

you're realizing this is real. This is,

35:48

so the first war that we really

35:50

televised, televised was the Iraq conflict in

35:52

1990, no,

35:55

it was 87 when we invaded Iraq, Desert

35:57

Storm. So That was the first one that

35:59

was ever televised. Never seen more you

36:01

get. Like Clean Energy and America has

36:03

made in was a lie or yeah,

36:05

we're watching on Netflix. Were watching we're

36:08

We're too fucking A lot Like is.

36:11

Really? Puts you try this at another and went

36:14

into that would organize all die guys are so

36:16

use it. As soon as you can see

36:18

you have to do suck or. bother

36:20

I have been broth and they

36:22

probably. Did she can possibly do? You have to

36:24

give. You a regular basis in reality as early

36:27

as the as will have to him has

36:29

just he has undergone only going to run

36:31

a quarter of a point of like their of

36:33

to there's i forget how you get it nice

36:35

and hot of head. That's.

36:38

Great. Summer front

36:40

about. Think it's different. Am

36:42

to any to do the same as your

36:44

fees. And then you're going to

36:46

get your other can either up with some sad

36:48

and are you can choose butter olive oil whatever

36:51

you're kind of building more expensive so the butter.

36:53

Them sorts of fortune five hundred, And. Feel I love

36:55

letters Nice. Can we put some of that

36:57

in? The result us is a glaze or

36:59

that crazy. Stalker zoom in on

37:01

him and or me. months in prison Built my mother

37:03

and. Son. In there is ugly. Why feel like. We

37:05

have. Will I be really good The Sleep On

37:07

Fire you for telling off on their as a

37:09

Dream of Eternal Fire last night I founded on

37:11

as soon as my mail for my Billie Greens.

37:13

These men do it safely. If you know I

37:15

have you ever like fuckin shots and like and

37:17

then go on our own family they'll feel safe

37:19

with dilemma. I don't feel safe with you about

37:21

him he on and mean researcher. We don't want

37:23

to associate member and kiss the guy a fucking

37:25

room. Where

37:27

what square I'm with? o que se

37:30

there's ever been. To the Vincent. Okay,

37:34

so let's also getting a spatula. Stitches.

37:37

Bachelor. Or. A wooden.

37:39

Spoon. Or got a special and a

37:42

wooden spoons. Athena still wouldn't Some. Unusual

37:45

my would work. With

37:47

a. Case of men. Had

37:50

all of your garlic in your alice

37:52

and they're. Very. Good.

37:55

Are you getting jealous? What? Are You just

37:57

getting time? Not just getting drunk, getting drunk.

37:59

And. I'm doing an incredible show if I need to take

38:01

your fucking spot in the podcast You'd

38:06

be shocked how quick I throw around the word best friend This

38:10

show is sponsored by talk space Do you think

38:12

seeing a therapist or a psychiatrist would be helpful?

38:14

But you don't have the time to actually find

38:17

one and meet with them or even afford them

38:19

Try talk space by doing everything online

38:22

talk space has made getting you the help

38:24

you want easy accessible

38:27

and Affordable with talk space you can

38:29

sign up online and get a personalized

38:31

match with a provider that's right for

38:33

you typically within 48 hours It's incredibly

38:35

convenient to have virtual sessions with your

38:37

licensed therapist from the comfort

38:39

of your own home There's no need

38:41

to commute to appointments miss time at work

38:44

lineup childcare just in order to attend sessions

38:47

It's mental health care made easy. I'm

38:49

telling you right now I

38:51

was a pain in the ass when it came to

38:53

going to therapy before doing it

38:55

online. I would skip it I would find

38:57

reasons not to go I would

38:59

if if it was during the afternoon I could already

39:01

tell you I wasn't gonna go because I don't want

39:03

to spend time in traffic because all of a sudden

39:05

I'm going into therapy with this heated mentality of being

39:08

like yeah, I This is

39:10

how far I had to drive 45 minutes It was

39:12

down by the Fox studios and I was in the

39:14

valley and I was like I'm not getting on pico

39:17

For four o'clock traffic to only

39:19

drive back in five o'clock traffic

39:21

as a listener of this podcast

39:24

You will get $80 off

39:26

your first month with talk space when you go

39:28

to talk space comm slash burning to match with

39:31

the licensed therapist today Go to talk space comm

39:33

slash burning to get $80 off your first month

39:35

and show your support for the show That's

39:38

talk space comm slash burning. Okay, I should

39:40

probably put a top on that right? No,

39:42

you're fine. Don't worry about it Um, okay. Now

39:44

you're gonna add your rice and toast up your

39:46

rice in that gorgeous buttery garlicky fat. Nice Fantastic.

39:51

It's starting to smell real nice in here.

39:53

It smells fucking good. Okay, it's crazy that

39:55

like garlic cooking smells great But when you

39:57

smell it in your wife's underpit, you're like,

39:59

that's wad Like, truffles

40:01

is great, but if you went down on

40:03

the chicken smell truffles, you wouldn't appreciate it.

40:05

Josh, should we deglaze with a roto? Uh,

40:08

dude, no, I feel like we, uh, we've gone bad at

40:10

it. Should we marry? We can't be married.

40:13

Oh, can I, have you guys come over to my house

40:15

as a pretend married couple? It'd be huge.

40:17

Cause you guys, watching you guys cook is sexy. Oh

40:20

really? It's fucking hot. It's fucking hot.

40:22

No, I'm very married to my very cute

40:24

husband. You're married? Yeah, I got married in

40:26

2021. Was he rich?

40:30

Um, he himself, he, you

40:32

know, he's growing, you know, he's like an entrepreneur. Come

40:34

on, is he a fool? He, he like went to

40:37

law, he's like, he just started law school four months

40:39

ago. Is he Jewish? Is he Jewish? Is

40:41

he Persian? We're both Persian Jews from Beverly Hills.

40:43

That's important. That's important. Well, as a Jewish, he

40:46

raps the fillings. Yeah. He's

40:48

a rapper too? Yeah. Um,

40:50

he raps the fillings. You have a one laugh from the

40:52

Jew in the room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you. Todah.

40:55

Um, so just add the roso. Add like

40:57

a slug of robo holes. Yeah.

41:00

Yeah. All the blood. All

41:02

the blood. And then move on.

41:04

Move on. Move on. Move on.

41:07

Move on. On delay. On delay. Mama.

41:11

EIEI. Uh oh. Is the culinary

41:14

term. Mix it up. Very nice. So

41:16

you're just gonna slow, mix it up

41:18

nice and beautiful. And while you see

41:20

the liquid evaporating, you're going to add more

41:22

of that warm liquid to cook the rice.

41:24

I made you a boulevardier. So

41:27

this is a one on one cocktail. It's like an agroni

41:29

except you still have a bourbon for the gin. And

41:31

it gives it a little more depth, a little bit

41:33

more wintery. You know, a little sort of

41:35

body to it. Keep going.

41:39

Is that a shallot peel? What?

41:42

Burke. What? Is

41:44

that a fucking shallot peel? Oh my god. No,

41:46

no, no, no. You fucking white girl. White

41:48

cow. Get out of there now! You don't. What

41:51

the fuck man? Alright. Oh, you did

41:54

it Gordon Ramsay? Yeah, keep going. You're hot as

41:56

fuck. Yeah. She cooked this motherfucker eggs two

41:58

days ago. eggs

42:00

and I was so nervous. For real? Yeah, he

42:02

really liked it actually. That's not shallow peel,

42:04

that's shallow peel. That's shallow peel. Get the

42:07

fuck out of here. Okay, good. Just keep

42:09

mixing. It's gotta

42:12

be tough being Gordon Ramsay because you gotta

42:14

always be Gordon Ramsay. Yeah. It's like being Simon

42:16

Cowell. You can't just fucking geek out and

42:18

be like, this is really fun. I don't know

42:20

man, I get the sense from Gordon that like that is

42:22

who he is 24-7 man.

42:25

He's running from something in a big way.

42:27

Not in a bad way, right? And

42:30

what a productive way. You know,

42:32

it's just find the shit you love and

42:34

just do that shit. If I

42:36

can say anything to my daughters, it's hey

42:38

drop out of school if you want to, but find that

42:40

shit you love and just fucking,

42:42

God yeah. You and my

42:44

wife. My wife's like, it needs pepper. I know

42:46

I never understand pepper. Like I'm a salt

42:49

guy, hot sauce guy. Yeah, I love salt. Oh

42:57

yeah. You guys ever have like

43:00

those viral ideas that you want to do, but

43:02

you can't because of constrictions. Meaning I wanted the

43:04

things I wanted to do and I wanted to

43:06

cook with marijuana and you can't

43:08

do that. The internet won't let you do

43:10

it. Yeah. Well, I had this whole idea

43:12

for like cough syrup based cocktails. What

43:15

cough syrup will we use? Listen, man. I mean, I'm

43:18

thinking straight at NyQuil. Like I'm not a, I'm not

43:20

a heavy guy. I don't know. Can you put NyQuil

43:22

in a cocktail and it works? I

43:24

have it. I mean, there's something I did

43:26

in college. I like how I whispered that

43:28

the cameras aren't going to pick it up.

43:30

You put, you put NyQuil in a cocktail

43:32

and drink it in college. Yeah. I mean,

43:34

we used to just like crush. NyQuil is

43:36

legit. NyQuil works. It's fucking good. It's not

43:39

addictive. Maybe, you know, you

43:41

don't need to do that. Okay. Sorry. It'll seep out.

43:43

Yeah. You're doing great.

43:45

You're doing really wonderful. You're doing a great

43:48

job. Nicole.

43:53

A ritalin call is

43:55

a viral video. You crossed

43:57

the rim with the ritalin.

44:00

Legally prescribed what

44:02

is it? What what is really? When

44:06

I tell you I'm like Persian Jewish sheltered. Yeah,

44:08

what I mean like yeah, but you guys did

44:10

ritalin, right? The

44:13

squiddle is a performance girl. Yeah, it's

44:15

a study drug. It's like times

44:20

I only read a book I read grapes

44:22

of wrath on fucking ritalin like Stupid

44:31

let's see where our rice is that it's probably

44:34

not done super not done I know but I want

44:36

to taste it so you can taste the salt Are we gonna sign

44:38

if anybody gives us like a wrap it up no man

44:40

will come up. Okay, but fuck that

44:42

is good Yeah, it tastes good beautiful. I

44:45

could break teeth eating this rice. It tastes like good Holy

44:48

shit, that's good. Take a look over your shoulder.

44:50

Tell me what you think of that bottle vodka

44:52

Oh My

44:56

this is trying can I try your vodka like

44:58

I don't mean to oh, did you know it was mine?

45:00

Well, I figured it was it's got two bears on em.

45:02

Yeah Yeah, we

45:04

just got it. I would love for you to try it. I

45:06

would love to try it man We both liked more of a

45:08

more of a round flavor We didn't want the

45:10

father we didn't want the vodka to overwhelm you and shout at

45:12

you in the morning when you're at the airport We

45:15

wanted it to go. Hey, it's gonna be

45:17

good. We've got your back, buddy. Nice. It's your

45:19

Monday. This is your Monday We're gonna get you

45:21

home. You're gonna have a good dinner tonight. You're

45:23

gonna enjoy your family You're gonna watch Monday night

45:25

football and you're going to sleep early. You got a gym

45:27

tomorrow more You gotta work out in the morning in

45:30

vodka with peppers like oh, so

45:32

we're getting it after it No,

45:34

I don't need you. I need soft

45:36

vodka. You know what the fuck you're talking about. I have no

45:38

idea Yeah,

45:42

I made you one you made me one it's

45:44

literally sitting right there I think I think I'm

45:46

the wrong ethnicity But

45:52

I think you should be well black obviously, but

45:55

I would be an

45:57

awesome black dude I you know I

46:01

would be so good. And I think I'd

46:03

be an amazing Italian. I think I'd be

46:05

an awesome Chinese person. What are you currently? I'm

46:08

just fucking white. Wait, but hold on. Like, Italian,

46:10

that's like... No, I'm fucking... No,

46:12

no, but what are you, Christ, you're

46:14

German? German-Irish, German-Irish. Gotcha, but like, that's

46:17

on par with Italian. Also, German and

46:19

Italian people don't fucking exist. What? Italy

46:21

was not a goddamn country until like

46:23

the late 1960s. This guy... No,

46:25

no! I love this fucking guy. Hear

46:27

me the fuck out. I fucking love this!

46:29

Every Italian... That's what I said. Italy doesn't

46:31

exist. Italy doesn't fucking exist. Hear me out.

46:33

The kingdom of Italy does. It was so

46:36

many different... Here, you hear this? Get the

46:38

fuck in here. No, wait, no. Where is

46:40

the... Definitely exist. Where is the Italian? Are

46:42

you Italian? Are you Italian? Yeah. I'm sorry, I

46:45

didn't mean to... No, no, no, no, no, no,

46:47

no. He's also my assistant. He has to agree with whatever I say. Anyway,

46:50

no, but he's Italian, but

46:53

he's Italian, but he's

46:55

Buffalo Italian. Or like

46:57

Rochester Italian. Wait. Sinoli,

46:59

what's that? Kind of the bottom

47:01

portion of the books. Is it, like,

47:04

every time, like, Sicily, Naples? Like, what's the closest major...

47:06

I don't know. Oh, you're not

47:08

Italian! Well, no, no, hear me out,

47:10

because, like, Italians didn't know they were

47:12

fucking Italian until 1863. A

47:14

dude named Giuseppe Garibaldi said, fuck it, I'm a

47:16

United. He rode a train around invading different kingdoms.

47:19

They were all different kingdoms. The pagan theme was

47:21

separate. That is actually true. That's 100% true. Unification

47:24

did not happen until the 1860s. That's

47:26

late. That's pretty late. It's

47:28

super late. You know you guys

47:30

are like the West Virginia of

47:32

Italy. I think you exist, and I

47:35

think Italy exists. Those are city haters. I

47:37

agree with that. There's a fucking fire right

47:39

now. I'm not even cooking! A vast majority

47:42

of Italian Americans are gonna see me out.

47:44

They're Southern Italian, right? Like, Sicilian, the Apollos,

47:46

and Sardinian, etc. etc. etc. At

47:49

some point, there was literally a

47:51

kingdom called the Kingdom of Two Sicilies,

47:53

because there were two separate fucking city-states

47:55

in Italy that couldn't decide who the

47:57

real Sicily was. They were underneath the

47:59

fucking... Napoleonic they were underneath

48:02

the Habsburg Empire. They're underneath Napoleon's rule

48:04

all this shit like this all this

48:06

all factual Oh fucking new Josh, but

48:08

then there's a Cuz

48:15

it all was the Ottoman Turks it is

48:18

like all of that Rome and it's crazy

48:21

That's crazy. It's but I man It's

48:24

the crazy thing about art. I can help you're

48:26

doing fine. Did you like me? No? No,

48:29

I would love to make another drink. Can you make another drink?

48:31

Oh god? Yeah What

48:35

do Lance Armstrong myself and Elon Musk

48:37

have in common hmm The

48:40

answer is deep restful sleep. Thanks to eight

48:42

sleep pod cover I use the eight sleep

48:44

pod cover and it has changed my life

48:46

It's time to bring high tech into the

48:49

bedroom by going to eight sleep calm slash

48:51

burning for two hundred dollars off their pod

48:53

Plus free shipping that's eight sleep comm slash

48:55

burning for two hundred dollars off the pod

48:57

plus Free shipping I'm telling you right

48:59

now. Leanna's a hot sleeper. It's cuz she grew up

49:01

in a cabin and she was freezing her entire life

49:03

She had a snake in her bathroom. She was a

49:06

redneck. Okay. I am a cold

49:08

sleeper because I grew up using cutlery

49:10

and wearing shoes to school. I Like

49:13

air conditioning. Okay, they have

49:15

a dual side heating and cooling perfect

49:18

for couples Autopilot features

49:20

the adjustment temperature to help you stay

49:22

asleep longer They have tracking technology that

49:24

reports your heart rate and other sleep

49:27

functions and the pod Fits

49:30

over your mattress that you already have

49:32

we have a California king

49:34

and I was nervous when it came

49:36

fits perfectly reclaim your sleep by going

49:39

to eight sleep calm slash burning for

49:42

$200 off the pod plus free

49:45

shipping That

49:48

looks fucking amazing And then

49:50

what do we do with these what do we do with

49:52

our I say we turn that on oh Some

49:57

all and get to cooking Oh

50:01

damn it you guys make my show fucking

50:03

great good how about all the time?

50:07

Well here all the time Yola,

50:10

all is we've been eating the bullshit.

50:12

I'm telling you over there. Let's talk.

50:15

Let's talk what guest Would

50:17

you for real like to have on but you're afraid of

50:19

the internet that they wouldn't like them Let you go you

50:22

go you're the arbiter for this you tell them cuz

50:25

I'll have whoever on I got

50:27

friends that have been like would you have broken on would

50:29

you have broken on? Rogan

50:36

is a controversial dude by the

50:38

way Listen

50:42

fear factor yeah Man,

50:44

I love when him and Doug Stanhope hosted the man

50:47

show You know

50:49

he's done with their stuff right what your factor is.

50:51

What do you mean? What do you think podcast is

50:53

the biggest thing in the fucking world? What's the pot?

50:55

What's the pot? Joe

50:58

Rogan's Joe okay Joe Rogan. Would you have

51:00

him on as a guest? Yes

51:04

Yes mix yes, I don't fucking know dude

51:06

the internet is the worst goddamn place in

51:09

the world do you have on yeah? Yes,

51:11

okay, Shane Gillis He

51:16

has relatives that have Down syndrome right yeah, then

51:18

yeah, yeah Oh Jordan

51:21

there, okay Good

51:24

production would you offer on a

51:27

million? No,

51:29

no fuck that you're just like Yeah,

51:33

yeah Fucking

51:41

come on we like okay just for

51:43

instance like Where we're at

51:45

on the internet hang on just so you know I

51:48

didn't vote for you I probably won't vote for you again. Yo

51:50

Donald serious invite. We're getting

51:53

fucked up, too I would love that don't

51:55

jump on um I would

51:57

okay. I want some locker room

52:00

Are you fucking kidding me? Fucking

52:03

keep going. Biden? Well okay,

52:05

so the Donald Trump thing, for instance, I'm vehemently

52:07

against his policies. I think the fact that he was

52:09

elected president is somewhat of a symptomatic of a downfall.

52:11

You don't have to say anything. You don't have to

52:14

say anything. You don't want to mean like this is

52:16

the shit that I actually believe is a fucking person.

52:19

I followed him on Twitter because I wanted

52:21

to know what the most powerful person in

52:23

the history of the world was gonna say.

52:27

I want to know if he was threatening nuclear war,

52:29

I wanted to know. It's 2 o'clock morning! We get

52:31

a monster bitch! I got this fucking wire! We

52:34

would get DMs, people would go on Reddit

52:36

and be like, why is mythical chef Josh

52:39

following Trump? Because I wanted to. Yeah, I

52:41

follow people with opposing views to me all

52:43

the time. It's never very funny. Oh

52:46

my god. And I'm married. Some

52:49

of them are really big sisters. Some of them really talented

52:51

and home cooked. Alright, porn star. Would you have a porn

52:53

star on? Yeah,

52:55

absolutely. I like VMLE for sex work. Josh

52:57

used to be, he used to host a podcast

52:59

with a porn star. I used to host a

53:01

podcast with a porn star and avid foodies. So

53:03

she'd go by Mia Lee but then Mia Little.

53:06

Did a lot of work with kink.com. She

53:08

also had MFA. Kink.com's legit. Yeah. That's

53:11

not, that's like good porn stars. That's

53:13

not even porn star stuff I would argue. I gotta be

53:15

honest with you, I think those are just liberators. Same?

53:19

Same, same, same. Like the people just, hey,

53:21

what? How am I doing with this? Taste it.

53:23

See if the rice is cooked. No, no, no,

53:25

I need to make a cocktail. Make a cocktail.

53:27

Okay. How's the rice tasting? Taste

53:29

is fine but cooked is what

53:31

matters. It's close. It's not there

53:33

yet. It's close. Okay. So

53:36

let it keep going. Drop it down to medium low. Sure, you can

53:38

drop it down to medium low. Okay. Got a

53:40

little bit more stuff. And then how about these? I've got this smoking, I

53:42

think we're good. Yeah. Throw them on

53:44

there. You ready for me? Throw them on there.

53:46

Oh, oh, wait, wait, Josh. Should he just throw it on or

53:48

should he dab it before he puts it on? Just throw

53:50

it on, man. Okay, just throw it on. You're crazy. Nice.

53:54

Look at that. Look at that. Can

53:56

you try this? Can you get me a plate? Come

54:01

on in. What do

54:03

you want? I need plates and...

54:06

Is that alright? Dude, dude, dude,

54:08

dude, dude, that's fucking great. Should

54:10

we pull it? I'd say

54:13

I'd drop a little bit of sugar now. No

54:15

sugar, fucking pull it, pull it, pull it. Wow,

54:17

look at these fucking... Wait, I have the literal

54:19

perfect fucking drink for this. And look at these

54:21

thu- these are perfect. Those look beautiful. These look

54:23

fucking beautiful. Those are beautiful. George, thank you so

54:25

much for pin shading on this. George,

54:27

you're the best. My

54:30

wife raised a good kid. The other one, not so

54:32

great, but this could. Hey,

54:34

will you play them over there? I'm

54:37

gonna fold some truffle in this, okay? Alright, I think

54:39

these are- these- this one might be

54:41

done. Alrighty, let's go ahead and pull it. You

54:43

wanna- you wanna feel it? Oh, thanks so much.

54:46

Should pull it through here. Tell me what you think.

54:48

Good. Yeah? These, maybe...

54:56

You wanna- you wanna feel this? No,

54:59

that needs a little bit more testing. Yeah. I

55:02

don't know. I saw the way that

55:04

it was squished in between the tongs. Flip

55:06

on this. Okay. That's

55:09

a nice charm. Yeah, it's a nice charm. That's

55:11

a truffle, so that's a white truffle. Oh yeah, George,

55:13

yeah, smell that though. Smells like parts. Yeah,

55:16

a truffle does smell like parts. Why does

55:18

it smell like parts? Because it's fine. Yeah.

55:20

Is it fine? Yeah,

55:22

it's like- it's like a mushroom. God damn it.

55:24

No, it's a dishwasher. That's- I think

55:26

our risotto's good. I think it's done. Do

55:28

you wanna see risotto? Yeah, I'll try it. Let's

55:32

pull them. Pull them? Let's see what we're working

55:34

with. Okay. Where

55:38

do you even got? Well, I couldn't

55:40

find a cocktail shaker, so I'm using the- Thank you. The, uh,

55:42

the olive jar. But we're making

55:44

a Jardinier martini right now. We're gonna take

55:46

this, we're gonna strain it in a couple

55:49

glasses. I like my martinis shaken, not stirred. There's

55:51

a little bit of agitation in there. So this

55:53

is the- Oh, Joshie! Jardinier

55:56

martini. Uh,

55:58

this is, uh, Sauv Blanc. and

56:00

vodka shaken with the juice from Jardiner. So you're

56:02

gonna get some of that brassica funk in there.

56:05

This is a happy drink. Wow.

56:09

Gosh, that's so good. That's fucking really good.

56:11

Stay, let's try this. I can make you a version one

56:13

of Just The Wine. I don't know who just

56:15

wants a sip of Jardiner. Oh, it's just

56:17

the wine. It

56:20

could use some more dilution, a little bit more shaking, what

56:22

is in the well. Are you okay? What? How

56:24

good is that? Yeah, it's like mid-midwell. That's

56:26

okay. Right? Do you get that like

56:28

kind of cauliflower, cabbagey brassica funk?

56:30

Yeah. I dig on that though. And that's

56:33

a big flavor in like Korean cooking. A lot of stuff's

56:35

like, a lot of cabbage, a lot of

56:37

radish based stuff. Right. You get it, you

56:39

get it? Yes, yes, yes, yes. Everyone get back to,

56:41

okay. Everyone is fucking

56:44

normal. This is off. Yeah, yeah. I've

56:46

got this, I've got our plates.

56:50

Oh. How's

56:53

it looking? Is it looking good? Good, look at that, nice

56:55

and rosy. Oh, I love it. It's gorgeous.

56:57

I love cutting it on the dais. A

57:00

little bit, yeah. Is it dais? Say

57:02

dais? Bias? Bias, sorry. I'm drunk. I

57:05

love cutting things on the bias. And

57:08

I love doing steak that way. And

57:10

I loved cooking a big cowboy steak

57:13

on the bias and then fanning it

57:15

out and letting people get it that way. It's

57:17

so much better than making everyone a full steak.

57:19

Yeah, yeah. And then there's the extra like presentation

57:21

from yourself. It's like you've gifted somebody something, which

57:24

is like the fucking essence of cooking, man. That's

57:26

why I love it. You can make a

57:28

little saucy sauce. With some lime juice, please. I copy you, chef.

57:30

Thank you so much. Can I use this cutting board or should

57:32

I use it in the frame? Yeah, you can use that cutting

57:34

board. That one's fine. That one's fine. I

57:36

pull you off for garlic in there? Sure. Chef,

57:39

I need one clove of garlic, stat.

57:41

Stat, coming up. Thank you, chef. This

57:43

is the prettiest one. Each

57:47

one is tasty. All right,

57:49

now let's go time. Now it's like, let's figure it out. We're gonna make

57:51

a paste. Damn, this

57:53

is, what an unassuming knife. It's gorgeous. Yeah.

57:56

Give a little chef a nod. Hopefully we're

57:58

not drunk enough to cut ourselves. Honestly. Fucking

58:00

drunk is like so much he didn't I

58:02

see them shell shock you Rgb to define

58:04

a headache. Or. My

58:06

dog adult. Or

58:09

this is under as an ugly guidelines you there? There's

58:11

just no I don't disagree with decided I'm very sad

58:13

but I'm. Gonna just

58:16

scored and score it and skimming. Oh yeah,

58:18

she's as quarter think if and that is

58:20

just with lines. Oh a lotta yadda didn't

58:22

even have the yeah we're winning a restaurant

58:24

without pressure on us up for Asylum separate

58:26

guy sounds out of the Bronx on the

58:28

island. The delia say that I'm I'm doing

58:30

half an hour tougher now. Getting sold. Them

58:33

on Yes, they think I'm. I'm

58:37

an immigrant cultures school. please don't know.

58:39

I don't know. Gone Islamic ma'am take

58:41

us through many do outside the fucking

58:44

not thought last the kid was a

58:46

miracle. Rail is actually gonna go out

58:48

for his home. At

58:50

the behind and would help the show

58:52

Father was that other to the virulent

58:54

you learn the know it. Every

59:00

gun first time anyone. oh no

59:02

no he brings I'm I'm like

59:04

dude assists. Haggard.

59:09

The Stitches Great movie soon as we

59:11

should probably go a consultant come in

59:13

and go. hey you know you definitely

59:15

to get one of the say have

59:17

you heard of a fucking lime? Government

59:19

has always have a lot when I'm

59:21

seriously. Considering our know

59:24

how made money for a remedy beauty

59:26

zoc, let's take a picture of someone,

59:28

remember it forever and say. Hey

59:33

thank you. Are I've had so

59:35

much from for those are really about someone from

59:37

the guns I mean us from a hard i

59:39

was reading more these of so disappointed too old

59:41

to doing is often I'm in the weeds I'm

59:43

just waiting for for puzzle know where I'm at.

59:46

And Mrs Such a joy of gotten

59:48

the great bonus! I'm so excited for

59:50

this deal and this for Zola looks

59:53

fucking amazing! You guys are an absolute

59:55

joy! Congratulations on all your success here!

59:57

Let's try to a person you said.

1:00:00

take your shirt off anymore and people

1:00:02

can I or do you can you would you

1:00:04

I would gladly I don't want to

1:00:06

break my shirt off the gold okay you don't have to

1:00:08

go I have consent to take my we got you stayed

1:00:10

we're doing it already

1:00:12

got the lab on the skin there it is okay all

1:00:16

right I'm

1:00:19

in my element no who doesn't want to eat veal

1:00:21

with two shirtless men yes

1:00:24

break and cheers guys oh oh this is really fucking good

1:00:26

goddamn it the Serrano

1:00:39

pepper is really such a

1:00:41

nice addition to this yeah yeah yeah

1:00:47

wow that's a

1:00:49

good time what am I tasting why

1:00:51

do I like everything compliments itself the sugar

1:00:53

all the sudden shows up dude sugar so

1:00:56

like the reason a lot of people love

1:00:58

East Asian food is just the addition

1:01:00

of sugar to meat because you talk about like you

1:01:02

see that browning on the lemongrass of Serrano and the

1:01:04

sugar are what is are talking to me right now

1:01:06

and then the mint the basil that funky little herbal

1:01:09

baseline coming in the back you know it's

1:01:11

a good fucking dish man damn

1:01:13

mm-hmm this

1:01:17

is for I'm going right to the bone this is excellent Nicole

1:01:19

thank you I'm gonna thank you so much for carrying oh

1:01:22

oh speaking of which

1:01:25

I should probably risotto yeah risotto is pretty good

1:01:27

yo the actual marinade on that and you did

1:01:29

that man you did the marinade you did a

1:01:31

great job I love what you guys do it's

1:01:33

so beautiful it's like this

1:01:35

I'm going we'll figure it out so same little

1:01:37

comedy you just start talking it will come out

1:01:39

you'll figure it out if it draws wrong it's

1:01:41

right right sure salt sure

1:01:44

salt more salt more lime let's do

1:01:46

lemon yeah it

1:01:48

just works oh

1:01:50

this is how I got into food in the

1:01:52

first place it's just like drinking with friends fucking

1:01:54

around in college you know ten dudes in a

1:01:56

duplex let's go buy 20 pounds

1:01:59

of beef tongue and see what happens, you know?

1:02:01

Oh my god. Jasmine

1:02:03

lemongrass truffle risotto. Very good.

1:02:06

Holy cow. Pretty good.

1:02:08

This is, um, this fucking risotto. This

1:02:12

is drugs food. Like, this

1:02:14

doesn't make sense. I don't listen

1:02:16

to The Grateful Dead. I don't do a ton of drugs with people.

1:02:18

I do a ton of drugs. Boy, do they love listening to The

1:02:20

Grateful Dead. I feel like you can only understand it.

1:02:23

That is what this risotto is right now. There's

1:02:25

so many different, the white northern

1:02:27

Italian truffle with, like, lemongrass and basil.

1:02:30

This has a, if you're a dead

1:02:32

fan, this has a

1:02:34

Franklin's Tower vibe. I'm

1:02:36

being serious. It's, Franklin's

1:02:39

Tower is a fun, kind of

1:02:42

playful song. It doesn't

1:02:44

need to crescendo. It

1:02:46

just fucking does. And it just,

1:02:48

you lose yourself in it. And that's what's great about

1:02:51

this risotto. And that's the smartest thing I've ever seen on

1:02:53

this show. But you have to be a

1:02:55

Grateful Dead fan. Like, a legit Grateful Dead fan. And you'll

1:02:57

understand how good this risotto is. Truffles are

1:02:59

Jerry Garcia. Truffles are

1:03:01

Jerry Garcia. The risotto's Bob Weir. But

1:03:04

truffles are Jerry Garcia. Oh,

1:03:06

fuck, man. That's the smartest fuck. Does

1:03:09

anyone follow the dead here? No

1:03:11

one? Go hit the streets, find a deadhead, bring him

1:03:13

in, see if we can confirm. God damn it. I'm

1:03:15

going to listen to that song on my walk home.

1:03:18

This fucking risotto is so good. Stace, want to try a

1:03:20

bite? Stace, you should really try it. Try it, Stace. Wait,

1:03:22

do we have fresh truffle that we can jam on the

1:03:25

bite? I have it on this. This has that bite. Oh,

1:03:27

yeah, yeah, yeah. Can you get it in there? Just

1:03:29

think like, drugs food. Mm. Right.

1:03:32

You feel it quite makes sense? Yeah. Oh, that's really

1:03:34

good. That's fucking my gravy. How great is it to be able to have it

1:03:36

in here? Want to try this? Please. Can

1:03:38

you make sure there's a serrano on there? Thank you.

1:03:42

I wanted to have the full experience. She deserves it. She works

1:03:44

so hard. Imagine if we had fish sauce.

1:03:47

I know. I know. Mm.

1:03:51

Yeah. Dummy good. That's what I cooked.

1:03:54

Ha ha ha. I

1:03:58

feel like I just. Neil is

1:04:00

like when I photoshopped pictures of my dick and said

1:04:03

it to Tom. Yeah, it's Mark. And then he goes,

1:04:05

you look great. And then I go,

1:04:08

you guys are my dick photoshopped. Thank you. That's

1:04:10

the nicest thing anyone's ever said. This is nothing

1:04:12

I want more in this life. You guys were

1:04:14

a pure joy to be around. You really are.

1:04:17

I've laughed this whole time. I've done zero work.

1:04:20

I did nothing. And I am having

1:04:22

one of the best meals I've ever had in my entire life with

1:04:25

the best cocktails. My only hope is

1:04:27

that we wrap this up and you make us all

1:04:29

one more cocktail just to close out and we don't

1:04:32

even fill it. We just have a cocktail. I

1:04:34

will gladly do that. Also, I know where you live

1:04:36

and I'm walking distance, so I'm just showing up. By

1:04:38

the way, this isn't my house. No,

1:04:41

it's there. This

1:05:02

episode was brought to you by The Machine.