0:00

Hey , ladies , and welcome to episode

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one hundred and ninety seven

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. I am super happy

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that you're here today and really excited about

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today's topic , and if you're new listening

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to this podcast either through

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a podcast platform or

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just watching me here on YouTube , welcome

0:17

. I'm happy that you're here , super

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excited that you're going to learn so many new coaching tips

0:21

to help you with your life and your career and

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, most importantly , with your family . And

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today's episode is

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all about knowing when

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to take a break and focus on

0:33

your family . And I just want to thank

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a new member that joined our Facebook

0:37

group . And , by the way

0:39

, if you haven't joined us at

0:42

Life and Career Coaching for military

0:44

and a veteran woman , I

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want to invite you to join us . All

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you have to do is scroll

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down to the show notes and you

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will find where you can join the Facebook group . Or

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, if you're in front of your computer or on your phone

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, all you have to do is go to bitlybitly

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forward , slash beyond

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the military GRP Again

1:08

, it's bitly

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beyond the military

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GRP and

1:16

you can find the Facebook group , life

1:18

and Career Coaching for

1:20

military and veteran women , where I will

1:22

be sharing an event

1:25

. Every month . I'll be hosting

1:27

an event with different topics so

1:30

very from family

1:32

life , career transition , pivoting

1:34

in your career , mom life . Also

1:37

, understanding your emotional health

1:39

, your mental being . How

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do we grow when it comes

1:44

to our desires

1:46

, our goals that we would like , productivity

1:49

will be a big one . So if that's something

1:51

that you are interested in learning more about , that

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you want to know more about tips

1:56

and tricks , hacks that will help you in

1:58

your day to day life , I invite you to join

2:00

us again . You know where to find

2:02

us or you can just search it in your Facebook app , and

2:05

so I'm grateful that our

2:07

new member she mentioned one of her

2:09

struggles , because you'll get questions asked

2:11

. I'll ask you your branch

2:13

, what you're struggling with currently , and also

2:16

an email so that I can be in

2:18

contact with you with freebies

2:20

or even just inviting you to

2:22

the events as a reminder , and

2:24

so the topic when I saw

2:27

that I'm like this is exactly what I need to talk about

2:30

, because I'm actually going

2:32

to be spending a lot more time with my kids this

2:35

year than I did the years before , and the reason

2:37

being I mean , they still get

2:39

off . Every winter break , they get

2:41

two weeks off , but

2:43

this year we don't have a newborn , we

2:46

have a toddler , and

2:48

so I want to be very intentional

2:51

with what we're doing with them and

2:53

how we get to spend this time together and , of

2:55

course , it's coming towards the end of the year . There's

2:57

so many things that I still want to get done and

3:02

, to be completely transparent and honest , there

3:04

isn't a lot that I have left

3:08

to do because I've actually thankfully , I've been

3:10

able to accomplish it

3:12

and got done with that task . But

3:15

I do want to get ahead of planning

3:17

for my Facebook group content

3:21

, anything that I want to post on LinkedIn , on Instagram

3:23

, and again recording these videos . Right

3:26

, I want to make sure that I get ahead of the

3:28

game . So , when it comes time for January

3:31

and everybody is back in school and we're back in the hustle and bustle

3:34

, we're all where we need to be and

3:36

we're not having all this mental drama up here

3:38

or all the drama up here , and

3:42

then I'm exhausted and overwhelmed

3:45

and frustrated and I'm burned out by January

3:48

15th which , by the way , there's also a trip

3:50

that I'm planning in January . Well , I'm helping plan , we're

3:54

going to meet with my book club , and

3:57

so , again , there's so many things going on constantly , which

3:59

is great , but

4:01

at the same time , you want to be able to

4:04

use that to our advantage and not

4:06

use it against us , right ? Like

4:09

not having time for a family , not knowing when

4:11

to take a break , which , again

4:13

, this is something that I know I have to constantly remind myself because

4:17

I'm actually going to be taken off of work , and

4:19

I want to be able to take some time off of

4:21

this podcast , some time off from

4:24

my coaching , and just be able to

4:26

focus on my kids for a couple of days and

4:29

my family to a very intentional but

4:31

also continuing the routine that we have

4:35

when it comes to spending time with them and it's not

4:37

a lot of time , so don't think that I'm spending hours

4:39

a day with them because

4:41

I don't have that much time . There's things that I have

4:43

to do for work and things that

4:45

I have to get done , and so , again

4:47

, it's just so many things that happen at the same

4:50

time that we want to be able to remind

4:52

ourselves . Like Wendy , now

4:54

it's time for you to take a break , and by that I

4:56

mean and I'll be explaining it here in today's episode

4:58

when to actually fully

5:02

detach from the work , because

5:04

most of the times , we're still thinking about it in our mind

5:06

. We're like , okay , I still have to do this , this , this

5:08

and this . Well , I'm

5:10

trying to play with my little one or read her a book , in the

5:12

back of my mind I'm thinking , oh , I cannot

5:15

forget to do X , y , z , and

5:17

I'm not actually spending and

5:20

being present with her at that

5:22

moment . And so , again , it's very important for us to be

5:24

conscious of that , not only as

5:26

individuals , as

5:29

a mom , as a wife , as a friend , but

5:31

also just as someone

5:33

that can take a deep breath and

5:36

to be okay with being

5:38

in one area without

5:41

having to be worrying about

5:44

30 other things that are going

5:46

on . It's very peaceful and

5:48

it's something that I have to constantly practice

5:50

and remind myself . Okay , there's

5:53

nothing in this world that

5:55

really needs my attention right now besides

5:57

me sitting on this couch or

6:00

just looking at my little one . Stand

6:02

up and fall , stand up and fall . Like I

6:05

can find joy in that . But

6:07

here's the thing it

6:10

becomes a problem because our mind

6:12

wants to protect us . Our

6:14

mind is like no

6:16

, you don't need to take a break , you

6:19

don't have time , you have a to-do

6:21

list that you need to accomplish . You have a thousand

6:23

things that you need to get done , not to mention take

6:25

your kids to their volleyball

6:29

or basketball practice , football practice , whatever

6:31

they may be in . And oh , by the way

6:33

, dinner needs to be served , dinner needs

6:35

to be prepared , food needs

6:37

to be on the table . Things

6:40

need to get done with , tina , right ? The

6:42

clothing , your clothing , needs to be washed

6:44

. Your work is requiring you to work

6:47

on this project . So this agenda , this

6:49

slide deck , you also

6:51

have things that you want to get done

6:54

. Like for me , very important is to

6:56

get my nails done , my eyebrows wax , I

6:58

need to take care of myself , and that is something

7:01

that we constantly need to do

7:03

, and it's

7:05

not required , but we enjoy

7:07

it , right , like that's my own

7:10

thing that I love to do . I love to

7:12

get my nails done , get my toes done , take

7:14

care of myself and just go and unwind

7:17

a little bit without having to be

7:19

worried about the kids or be worried about what I

7:21

have to do . What needs to get done ? Oh my gosh

7:23

, the laundry basket is completely full

7:25

. What's happening ? The house

7:28

needs to get cleaned , so on and so forth . So

7:31

again , our brain is going to remind us

7:33

of the quote unquote important

7:35

things , but here's what we need to

7:37

do and here's how we know we need to take

7:39

a break , one . If you

7:42

are questioning no

7:44

one wants to take a break and focus on family , then

7:46

you need to actually be intentional about

7:48

taking a break and actually focusing

7:51

on your family . Now , I know

7:53

, most of the time , too , this is what happens . Our

7:55

brain wants to give us this

7:58

agenda that we need

8:00

to check off for our kids , or the time

8:02

that we need to focus on our family . We need

8:04

to go on a trip , we need to do something

8:06

extravagant , we need to

8:08

just do something that's not out

8:10

of the ordinary is what our mind is going to tell

8:13

us , and that's completely false . It's

8:15

not true . You don't have to do anything crazy

8:17

like that . You don't have to plan

8:19

a trip to the park or plan

8:22

a play date or

8:24

be something that's so

8:26

detailed

8:29

oriented . It doesn't have to be that way

8:31

at all . Our brain wants to not

8:34

only overcomplicate , but

8:36

it also wants it to be perfect

8:38

, and that is one of the problems that

8:40

we run into , because we're like thinking about

8:43

that gives you this whole thought

8:45

of I don't have time for that . I already have a thousand

8:47

things going on which is not gonna happen . I'm

8:49

not gonna plan this ice cream trip or

8:51

this trip to the park , because now

8:53

it requires two hours of my time versus

8:55

20 minutes , and so that's

8:57

like the first thing , right ? Like our brain wants

8:59

to overcomplicate and just remind

9:02

us that we don't have time for it . So

9:04

here's the thing you know that you need to spend time with your

9:06

family we all do but why is

9:08

it that we want to push

9:10

that to the very bottom of our list ? I

9:14

pretty much just told you why we overcomplicate

9:17

it and we don't prioritize

9:19

it . That's really the biggest piece . We think

9:21

that it's not necessary

9:23

because everything else

9:25

is urgent . But if we really think about

9:27

it , if something were to happen to our little ones , if something

9:30

were to happen to our spouse , I

9:32

am 99.9% sure

9:34

that you will drop anything that is

9:36

going on , or really 100%

9:38

guaranteed . You would drop . Whatever

9:41

you're doing , whatever event you're at , whatever

9:44

milestone you're in , whatever

9:46

minute you're in your workout , whatever

9:49

it is project presentation

9:51

that you're given , you will drop that and

9:54

you will go and spend time with

9:56

your family because they need you . We

9:59

don't want to get to that point . We want to be

10:01

able to do it ahead

10:03

of time , and so this is what I want to

10:05

recommend , because a lot of the times

10:07

our brain , like I mentioned earlier , wants to

10:10

keep us safe , and

10:12

having fun or spending

10:14

time outside of our to-do

10:16

list is somehow not

10:19

accomplishing . It's

10:22

something that your brain is like nope , that

10:24

sounds like it's too much fun , it's

10:27

not serious and

10:29

we don't need to focus on that . We need to focus

10:31

on what really matters right now , and that is

10:33

the laundry , that is dinner

10:35

, that is the project that you're working on

10:37

. You have to record a podcast , you have to do

10:39

all these things . There's no story

10:41

time , there's no conversation about how

10:44

your day went at school . I don't have time for that . We

10:46

can talk about that later , and it's okay

10:48

if you already have a routine in

10:51

place . But if you don't , and you continue

10:53

to put family time at the very bottom , knowing

10:55

that it's just not gonna work out for

10:58

you that day , then we

11:00

are not going in the right direction because we're not prioritizing

11:02

our family time . And here's what I believe

11:05

when we can be intentional with prioritizing

11:07

certain things , it will

11:10

get done , no matter what . Now , of course

11:12

, there are things that happen right , like things

11:15

happen . Things come up one child

11:17

will get sick , you can't cater

11:19

to the other two because you have three of them , or you have five

11:22

of them and now you have to focus on that one

11:24

child because he or she's the youngest

11:26

, or your spouse gets sick and now , all

11:28

of a sudden I don't know about everybody

11:31

else , but what I've been hearing is very similar

11:33

to my story . When our spouses get sick , it's like everything

11:35

just shuts down for them and it's completely

11:37

okay . I think that's a part

11:39

of who they are as men . They love

11:42

to just completely shut

11:44

down and then they get back up 100%

11:46

, and I think that's something that we need to do better at too

11:48

, because it does help with

11:51

their recovery and how they rest

11:53

and recover and then they get back up . That's

11:55

a whole nother podcast for another time , but

11:57

what I want to emphasize is

11:59

to truly be able to

12:01

be intentional in deciding ahead

12:03

of time on these

12:06

three things that I'm gonna talk about , so

12:08

that you can continue this routine , because

12:10

if you don't remind your brain , you don't

12:12

remind yourself . It's not

12:14

going to happen . It's just not

12:16

going to happen because our brains

12:19

are going to be fighting against

12:21

what we believe is important , what we believe

12:23

is urgent , because our brain can't

12:26

determine or distinguish what

12:28

really is urgent unless you

12:30

use that prefrontal cortex and

12:32

you guide it

12:35

by not only reminding

12:37

yourself that , okay , yes

12:39

, I'm going to

12:41

take 20 minutes out of my

12:44

workout time or my

12:46

work time to do this

12:48

, but it's going to benefit me

12:50

10 times more if

12:52

I do this or I

12:54

plan this for today . If not

12:56

, I'm going to be constantly feeling guilty

12:58

because I have this thought of I

13:00

should be there and I

13:02

wasn't there . I wasn't present and

13:04

now you're just not going to work effectively when you

13:06

need to get back to work . You're not going to be

13:08

effective in your workout . You're not

13:10

going to be effective in whatever

13:13

you need to do recording a podcast , I'm just

13:15

giving you my example or planning your transition

13:18

, or planning your finances , planning

13:20

your investments , whatever you may be

13:22

doing you may be in real estate investing

13:24

. You may have another side

13:26

hustle . You may be

13:29

pursuing your education . You won't

13:31

be able to study the same because in the back of your mind

13:33

, you're like oh man , I'm not spending quality

13:35

time with my kids . They need me . I'm

13:37

a terrible mother . I

13:39

should be more focused on them . I can't

13:41

focus anymore . I'm just going to go and distract myself

13:44

and do it unintentionally

13:46

. And now they're sleeping and all

13:48

these things keep coming up and then

13:50

you're like , okay , this is not working

13:52

. Like how do I know when to

13:55

take a break and focus on my family

13:57

? And so here are the three

13:59

things that I highly encourage that you focus on

14:01

, and the

14:03

first one is how does this benefit

14:06

the family and yourself ? Like

14:08

, how does this benefit you planning ahead

14:10

of time the intentional

14:12

time of when you're going to take a break from work or

14:15

whatever it is you're doing and

14:17

spend time with them ? So , for

14:19

me , I've actually asked my family this

14:21

question of what

14:23

is it , or what's their love language

14:26

? Pretty much Like , what do they enjoy ? And if you

14:28

haven't read the book , how you recommend that you read the five

14:30

love languages by Gary Chapman . That

14:32

book completely transformed my life

14:34

with how people want to be

14:37

loved and how people want to receive love

14:39

, and it works

14:41

differently for everyone , and for

14:44

my family it is as well . Everyone's

14:46

a little different and it's

14:48

okay . We're all different , but

14:50

the main one that

14:53

came up over and over again

14:55

with my kids and

14:57

my husband was quality time . They want

14:59

quality time , they want the quality time

15:02

with you , and it's crazy

15:04

how it sounds In my head . I'm like what do you mean I

15:06

spent enough time with you already . I

15:08

know crazy , terrible thought

15:10

to have , but here's the thing . The

15:12

key word there is quality , right . And

15:14

so , yes , we go grocery shopping together

15:17

. Yes , I drop you off at school , yes

15:20

, we're here together talking

15:22

and just being ourselves , or

15:25

practicing whatever we're doing , but

15:28

at the end of the day , they want that one on one , they want

15:30

that quality time , and so

15:32

it's like what I can't win , like what

15:34

do you mean ? Like I do a thousand

15:37

other things and you still

15:39

want time and everything else . Anywho

15:41

, step one is for you to ask what

15:44

is your love language ? Your husband

15:46

, your kids , your friends , your family

15:49

, whomever it is that you want to spend

15:51

more intentional time , take a break

15:53

from and focus on them . This is what you want to ask them

15:55

what is your love languages ? And for those of you

15:57

that haven't read or don't know or just don't

15:59

remember the love languages , it's quality time

16:02

, acts of service , gifts

16:04

, physical touch and words of affirmation

16:06

. It's very different for everyone

16:08

and it's okay to have

16:11

. They can rank it from one being

16:13

their highest all the way to the number five , because

16:15

, honestly , we all want these things . We are

16:17

all gravitated

16:20

to quality time . We love acts of

16:22

service , we love gifts , we love physical touch

16:24

, words of affirmation , right Like reminding

16:26

us that we're loved , reminding us

16:28

that we're beautiful , reminding us that we're doing

16:30

an amazing job . We love that . Now

16:32

, some people love it more than others . I'll

16:34

be completely honest I love words

16:37

of affirmation . If you can sit there and

16:39

tell me all day , every day , that

16:41

I'm doing a great job and that you love me and that I'm

16:43

beautiful and I'm

16:45

just doing a great job , please

16:48

do so . Like that would

16:50

be my thing . But it's also

16:52

quality time and it's also acts of service and it's

16:54

also gifts and physical touch , but

16:56

again , understanding what it is for

16:58

your family , because

17:00

you also want to let them know what it is for you . Now

17:03

, for the most part , they

17:06

will not necessarily

17:08

. I don't want to say that they won't care , but

17:10

they just won't . It won't

17:12

click for them at the beginning . You have to show them . So

17:15

this is the way like and my husband does a great

17:17

job of doing this he's like I'm not gonna sit here and

17:19

tell you , I'm just gonna show you and so

17:21

you showing them that you appreciate

17:24

quality time or

17:26

words of affirmation , whichever

17:30

one it is for their , you know , for example , for my daughter

17:32

it's quality time . She's like give

17:35

me quality time , and I know that

17:37

you're like loving on me all day , every day , and I'm like

17:39

, oh , okay , great , so I'm

17:41

just not gonna tell her , okay , we're gonna spend quality time . I

17:43

actually have to show her . So then when she sees

17:46

that she knows that , okay , I'm actually

17:48

spending time with her , having one-on-ones

17:50

with her , and then she's gonna reciprocate my

17:53

love language . That's the way , kind of

17:55

like how we go around in this household . And

17:58

so for you , figuring that out , figuring

18:00

that out ahead of time very

18:02

important . The next thing you wanna do is

18:04

decide ahead of time on the amount

18:07

of time that

18:10

you want to do that

18:12

activity . Or you know , if it's quality time

18:14

, you know , is it gonna

18:16

be 15 minutes , is it gonna be 30 minutes ? Whatever

18:19

you can afford at that moment , right ? I like

18:21

to look at this as a budget . What can you afford

18:23

? Can you afford 15 minutes ? Or

18:25

are you like affording

18:27

, you know , an hour , whatever

18:29

it is , and then , when it

18:31

works best , right , because it may be 15

18:34

minutes , monday , wednesday , friday , but maybe

18:36

Tuesday and Thursday you have

18:38

30 minutes . Or vice versa , right

18:40

, whatever it may be . Or you

18:42

know that you're going on an actual

18:45

training event or a work trip , or

18:47

you have this big event that you're planning and you know that

18:49

the month of January you're gonna

18:51

be completely focused on that

18:53

project or focused on that event or that travel

18:55

. So now , how do you plan

18:58

ahead of time ? And you set that intention ahead

19:00

of time with them . Well , you say , hey , you know

19:02

, in January , you know how we typically we

19:06

hang out every day for 15

19:08

minutes . Well , in January we're only gonna

19:10

be able to do it on Saturday

19:12

for this amount of time . Where

19:15

do you want me to take you ? Or how do you wanna spend

19:17

it ? Right , what if it's words of affirmation

19:19

? What if there's just words of affirmation ? How do I do that

19:21

in an hour ? Right , maybe you record

19:23

something . Maybe you record something

19:25

for them ahead of time . I'm just coming up

19:27

with stuff here , talking my head , or

19:30

if it's physical touch , obviously you can't like

19:32

be there to hug them or

19:35

to like tickle them or whatever they like you

19:37

know for them , but you

19:39

can remind them that , hey , when I come

19:42

back I will give

19:44

you a big hug or whatever it is

19:46

, send you a photo of us hugging each other , or whatever it may

19:48

be . Gifts maybe send them

19:50

a gift while you're gone . Maybe send them a gift while

19:53

or right before you leave , or whatever

19:56

it may be for them right ? Or maybe getting

19:58

them a gift and talking about that gift or just

20:00

enjoying the gift , right , the

20:03

gift may be , I don't know

20:05

, a game and now you both play

20:07

that game , or however you

20:09

all decide to do that , but making sure

20:11

that you set that intention ahead of time , the amount

20:13

of time and when it works best for them , for

20:15

both of you , pretty much . Because what

20:17

if they have soccer practice ? What

20:19

if you have five kids ? Right , thankfully

20:22

only have three , they don't have to worry about three , but

20:24

you may be blessed with five . And

20:26

now how do you do that without five

20:29

? They're all different . So writing it

20:31

down , whatever it may be . But now you know , okay

20:33

, child A wants

20:35

to spend time at a park

20:37

, child B wants to

20:39

spend time by

20:42

me , like cooking them a meal

20:45

or cooking a meal together , whatever it may be . And

20:47

then the last thing , understanding

20:50

the how right . So this one

20:52

is . This is where we get very detailed . So

20:54

then you have that conversation with that

20:56

individual , with your husband , with your

20:58

kids . It's always

21:01

a lot . It's

21:04

simple with kids , because they will tell you

21:06

like what they want . They'll

21:09

give you the truth . They're gonna

21:11

be like oh no , don't take me to whatever

21:13

place , because I sometimes I come up with

21:15

these great ideas right in my brain and they're like that

21:17

was a terrible idea , we're not going there . Like

21:20

no , we're not going there . And I'm like , oh okay , it

21:22

was just the thought , but in my head I

21:24

was like no , it was actually . I thought it was a great idea

21:26

. Again , my kids

21:28

are almost teenagers and it's getting

21:30

harder and harder . You all because they

21:32

don't want to spend that much time with me in

21:34

public . They're like no , mom , I

21:36

want to go with my friends . I don't want to go to the mall with you

21:38

, I rather just go with my friends . Anywho

21:41

, you become very intentional

21:44

ahead of time . Do we want

21:46

to you know , maybe work on homework together

21:48

? Do we want to play sport ? Do

21:50

you want me to practice with you ? That's one of the biggest

21:52

things with my son , like he loves when

21:55

he and I like throw the ball together

21:57

, like football , or he wants me to go out there and play

21:59

basketball with him . Anything that they

22:01

want to get done . So

22:04

we've been very specific . Okay , so

22:06

I'm going to meet you here outside

22:09

for 20 minutes at

22:12

6 pm every day , or once a week , and

22:14

we're going to play basketball , whatever

22:16

it may be . I'm just giving you an example . But

22:20

just understanding on what all of this is going on and

22:23

this is what I want to leave you with your brain

22:25

is going to think that you're going crazy . Your

22:28

brain is like what are you doing ? We

22:30

have so many things to get done . We don't want

22:32

to get disappointed . Remember , we

22:34

don't want to go through that discouragement , we

22:37

don't want to fail . What's going on

22:39

, wendy ? What's going on ? Why

22:41

are we having fun and not

22:43

doing the work that

22:45

we need to get done ? When

22:47

that happens , I want you to acknowledge

22:50

that it's okay . Acknowledge that

22:52

, yes , it's okay that we have things in the back of our mind

22:54

Almost 99%

22:57

of the time , because that's just the way

22:59

our brain works . But

23:01

I also want you to

23:03

be able to guide your

23:05

mind and create those new paved

23:08

or not paved , but

23:10

new kind

23:13

of way of thinking , because

23:16

if we don't , then

23:18

our brain is going to just take over and

23:22

it's going to want to do all the work . It's

23:25

going to remind you that you have so much to do that

23:27

you don't have time to take a break and focus on your family . Like

23:29

, why would you want to do such a thing ? They're going to be

23:31

there , they're okay , they're fine . But

23:35

what if they're not ? What if they want your attention

23:37

? And what if , like them coming

23:39

to you constantly while you're trying to do work

23:41

is the way that they're asking

23:43

for your attention ? And you're just now frustrated

23:46

and overwhelmed and you're like I'm not going to be able to do this . How

23:48

do I accomplish this If you keep coming

23:51

to me and asking me all these questions ? What if

23:53

you do set some time ahead

23:56

of time and be

23:58

intentional with taking a break and

24:01

focusing on family ? Now , of course

24:03

, you can go extravagant , right . Like , let's say , you have

24:05

two weeks off , your unblocked leave , or you have time

24:08

off from work . You're like you

24:10

know what ? We're doing ? Something extravagant for two weeks

24:12

, we're going to do XYZ . That's

24:15

completely fine . You're going

24:17

to be able to take that type of break is also great . But

24:20

I will tell you that your brain is still going

24:22

to offer you those thoughts . You

24:24

should be working , you should be doing this , you

24:26

should be doing that . Nothing wrong with that

24:28

your brain is just doing his job . What

24:31

I want to offer you is to take a moment and really

24:33

plan it out and really say , okay , we're

24:35

going to go on this trip , we're going to go wherever

24:37

you decide to go for those two

24:39

weeks or a week days , whatever

24:42

it is , but be realistic

24:44

and intentional on how you want

24:46

to use that time . If

24:49

this is your first time doing it and you're going

24:51

cold turkey from being

24:53

a constant workaholic to spending

24:55

time with your family it's going to

24:57

be like when you get out , when you try

24:59

to go cold turkey from caffeine , it's

25:03

not going to go the way you planned it it's

25:05

. I'm just letting you know now what

25:07

you want to do is to focus on

25:09

one day at a time . Okay , I

25:11

have 10 days I'm going to spend with my family , or 20

25:14

days , whatever it may be for you . Be

25:16

intentional with focusing with one day at a

25:18

time . Okay , day one , I'm just selling on me

25:20

a family day to . I'm going to incorporate

25:22

an hour of checking my emails or

25:25

doing a project , and so on and so forth . Whatever

25:27

you think is going to work for you and being okay

25:30

with it . Now , if you want to try

25:32

the cold turkey . Go for it . I'm not saying

25:34

that you shouldn't , but I want

25:36

you to be prepared that your brain is going to offer

25:38

you so many crazy things that you know like your business is going

25:40

to be Like shut down because you're not there , like

25:43

just lies , that it's going to feed you or no

25:45

one's going to listen to your podcast If

25:48

you stop podcasting for a week or for two weeks

25:50

, if you don't get this right , they're

25:53

just going to , you know , discount you

25:55

and just not engage with

25:57

you anymore , whatever it may be . So

26:00

I want to offer that you be intentional

26:02

, realistic with the time that you do have

26:04

to spare , in the time that you do

26:06

have to actually focus on

26:08

work because , trust me , I

26:11

don't know about your kids , but my kids , they

26:13

don't want me to be with them all day , every

26:15

day . Of course they want

26:17

their alone time . They want their time with their friends

26:19

. They want time to play with you

26:22

know their game , time to be on the phone

26:24

, time to sketch whatever they need to

26:26

sketch , time to be on TikTok , whatever

26:28

it is . Be okay

26:31

with where you are now and just continue

26:33

to monitor . Okay , if you're

26:35

thinking , do I need to take a break ? And

26:39

you know focus to be with my family , then

26:41

the answer is totally yes . You do need to take a break and

26:44

then just become more intentional with it , day

26:46

by day , week by week . It's hard

26:48

, especially if you haven't done it in

26:50

a long time , but I promise you it's completely

26:52

worth it . Your kids are going to notice it , Everyone

26:54

around you is going to notice it and it's going to be so much better

26:57

. All right , ladies ? Well , I hope that

26:59

this episode was helpful and that you not

27:01

only start taking action right away

27:03

with how to start implementing this ahead

27:05

of time especially as the holidays are right

27:07

around the corner and you'll have maybe a

27:10

day or two to spend time with them but

27:12

also be intentional with how you

27:14

are also thinking and how you're feeling

27:16

, because we don't want the mom guilt . That's

27:19

not necessary . It's something that we

27:21

don't need to continue to compound

27:23

and to feel unless

27:25

we can , you know , manage it , and we can

27:28

. We can manage how we feel , and

27:30

that starts with your thinking . So how can

27:32

you start thinking in a way where , okay , I'm going

27:34

to be intentional , I'm going to set some time

27:36

, I am going to be able

27:38

to do this through an activity or through whatever

27:40

it may be for you and be able

27:42

to actually be intentional in that

27:44

way . All right , I hope this helps

27:47

you and listen . Like I said earlier , if you are

27:49

not in my Facebook group , I highly encourage that

27:51

you join as soon as possible . I'm

27:53

going to start adding so many things

27:55

in there , like the events , the calendar for 2024

27:58

. So stay tuned . There's

28:01

more to come in the Facebook group . Come join us , come

28:03

say hello and listen . If you need some more

28:05

help 101 help , feel

28:08

free to schedule a free consultation Call

28:10

with me . All you have to do is scroll down to the bottom

28:12

of this podcast episode or go to winyarraycom

28:15

for a slash consult and schedule

28:17

a call with me so that we can go one on one

28:19

, step by step , on how we can continue to

28:22

improve your emotional well-being , your

28:24

maybe the things that you are procrastinating

28:27

on , the productivity . Maybe you needed

28:29

a tool help 101

28:31

on how to actually get this to-do list as

28:33

a routine and not just as a list , and just

28:35

completely get rid of your to-do list forever and

28:38

really put together a routine

28:40

that will help you every single

28:42

week , every single day , so that

28:44

you can continue to make progress in

28:46

your life . All right . I hope that this

28:49

blessed you and enjoy the rest of your week

28:51

. Talk to you soon . Bye .