I’m so glad to be back with the Bible Momming podcast. It’s pretty exciting, the podcast has been growing and it’s actually international now. So I’m elated to welcome listeners from Great Britain, Germany, India, Kuwait and South Africa. 

 

This is a pretty crazy time of year as kids are starting school or going back. I tend to love and hate it at the same time. I love the sense of organization as my kids end up having a regular schedule with people to see and things to do. I also hate the extra layer of business it adds to my schedule as the school has plenty of things they want me to do in addition. Plus, I miss my kids when I don’t get to spend as much time with them. This was especially true when my girls were in elementary school. 

 

Now, we pulled out of traditional public school in favor of charter school and my oldest is now attending college, but I remember those feelings and still struggle a bit with them even now. 

 

I’ve really appreciated our charter school because they have been great for our kids, but I would love it if you would please pray for the charter schools in California. There are some bills making their way through our state legislature that could make it tough for families like ours. There’s a lot of competition for state funding and charter schools are being made to look like bad guys. That is anything but the truth, so please pray for the families and our legislators as they try to figure this stuff out. 

 

Now, today I want to talk with you about something you may not realize you are doing. 

 

Leadership.

 

Over 30 years ago, I held my first leadership role. I was a counselor for teenagers at a camp for the summer. I had just finished my first year of college and wanted to help my church. So, I volunteered to go to camp. I volunteered for high school camp because we didn’t have enough students to go to Jr. high camp. It didn’t occur to me how crazy that was until I was there and it dawned on me that I was leading people who were also my age. Some seniors were 18, but I was 18 after one year of college. They put me in charge of a group of freshmen and I decided to do the best I could with them and not think about the ages of other kids at the camp. It was an amazing experience and I think I did pretty well. 

 

Since then, I’ve become passionate about learning from great leaders because I always want to get better at helping others. Eventually, I became a youth pastor and started to awkwardly put together some of the things I had been learning. From there, I became an associate pastor and a children’s pastor. I’ve coached couples on how to improve the quality of their marriage and I’ve written books for couples and families. 

 

Through it all, I’ve still passionately sought wise leaders to guide me. I meet with them face to face or read their books or listen to their podcasts. I always thought the leadership skills I was learning were strictly for helping with work as a pastor or speaker. 

 

Now that my own children are in their teens and one is almost done with her teens, I realize how much mom advice I got from those leadership gurus. I realized how their lessons helped me to be a better mom and help my own kids to become the best they can be. So, today I want to pass some of that onto you. You see, you are a leader momma. 

 

From the day the doctor or nurse handed your beautiful baby over to you, you became a leader. Over the course of your child’s life, you will give them insight into ways to eat, how to act, how to handle hardships, how to build friendships, when to keep pushing forward and when to back away. You’ll help your son or daughter to know their strengths and weaknesses. You will introduce them to God and the Bible. You will be their primary source of encouragement and direction. You will attempt to support and teach them school things, but predominantly you will be leading them in how to be the best human they can be. 

 

If you doubt me, listen to some of the definitions of leadership offered by the many leaders I’ve studied over the years. See how you fit into these definitions. 

 

 

"Leadership is not about titles, positions, or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another." --John C. Maxwell

 

"Don't follow the crowd, let the crowd follow you." --Margaret Thatcher

 

"The greatest leader is not necessarily the one who does the greatest things. He is the one that gets the people to do the greatest things." --Ronald Reagan

 

"A true leader has the confidence to stand alone, the courage to make tough decisions, and the compassion to listen to the needs of others. He does not set out to be a leader, but becomes one by the equality of his actions and the integrity of his intent." --Douglas MacArthur

 

"Leaders think and talk about the solutions. Followers think and talk about the problems." --Brian Tracy

 

"The art of leadership is saying no, not saying yes. It is very easy to say yes." --Tony Blair

 

 

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

 

Do you see it now?

 

Can you see how you are a leader?

 

As we seek direction from the Bible on how to be the best mom we can be, I want you to look at God’s directions to leaders because those are for you. We all know moms who mess this up because they doubt their own leadership skills, they doubt the confidence for this role. But, the Bible is loaded with people who had those same doubts concerning the leadership role they were given. 

 

You may be a clerk at a grocery store or an administrative assistant and it may be tough for you to grab this. It was tough for Moses too. He begged God to send someone else to help the Israelite people. Or maybe you are a leader at work, you manage 200 or more people and coordinate major corporate events. But kids scare you. Funny thing about work leadership. There is always someone else who can come and take your job. They may do it as good as you or even better. But when it comes to being the mom of your child, you are irreplaceable. You are uniquely placed in this space at this time to train up and raise these people. And much like many Biblical leaders, you can do it. 

 

In Jesus’ day, the disciples had many poor leaders to look at. Consider that time period. It was brutal and so were the leaders. And yet, there are definite similarities between how people of leadership acted between then and now.

 

Mark 10:42-45 (NLT)

42 So Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them. 43 But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, 44 and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else. 45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

 

That’s precisely what great moms do. They serve their family. They serve their kids. That can look differently with different people. It could mean being the transportation, it could mean being the main food server. It also could me picking out clothes or attending an event that you are not looking forward to attending. Serving means acknowledging that it’s not all about me. 

 

This can be tough. That why we need to know what God told to the prophet Isaiah to pass on to the people of Israel when they felt defeated and tired. This is for us too Mommas.

 

Isaiah 41:10 (NLT) 

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.

    Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you.

    I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

 

It doesn’t matter what age you are either. I know many young mommas who are starting this leadership process. I have heard their frustrations and how they wish they knew more or had more experience. 

 

The Apostle Paul sent a letter to a young leader named Timothy addressing this exact thought. 

 

1 Timothy 4:12 (NLT)

12 Don’t let anyone think less of you because you are young. Be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity.

 

Each of us has a beautiful capacity to lead the people God gave us to lead. And I know it’s tempting to show off or to compare ourselves to one another. It’s an easy trap to fall into. There are some things our kids will have in common with other kids. And yet, they are preciously unique and we are on the ground floor to see that. So let’s be careful of those temptations that all leaders struggle with. That’s why Paul mentioned it to the believers in the town of Philippi by saying…

 

Philippians 2:3 (NLT)

3 Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.

 

Believe me I struggle with these too. I want to show off my kids and what they do as an athlete or a scholar. But I also struggle with how to express a thought that will truly be encouraging to them or how to finally motivate my child to have a clean room. There is so much more to our stories than the pictures we post on social media. And, when they move out and do their own thing, they will still have challenges that I may or may not have helped them prepare for. It’s intimidating.

 

I still remember having spent so much time with so many children before my girls were born. That first day in the hospital when the nurse came to show my husband and me some basic ways to care for our baby and I was scared. I still get scared sometimes. I get afraid that I will have made a decision that has a detrimental impact on the rest of their lives. I think we all feel that sometimes.  So do other leaders. That’s why God’s first words to Joshua when he became the second leader of the Israelites were these. And they fit us too.  

 

Joshua 1:9

This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

 

Mommas, we desperately need to strength that God can and does give us. We won’t do everything right. No leader does. We take one step at a time and move forward knowing that He is with us and that He has great promises for us like this.

 

Galatians 6:9

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 

 

Coming up on the Bible Momming podcast, I’ve got some great guests and some help to develop habits that will strengthen you and enable you to be the strong leader God designed you to be. 

 

Over the next couple of months I’m talking with Brooke Hempell from the Barna group about research they’ve been doing on what strong households of faith look like. I’m talking with Beth McCord about how knowing your enneagram type and your family’s types and how that will help you to appreciate one another more. I’m talking with author Mary Kassian about being the right kind of strong, and so much more. 

 

I’m so enthusiastic about this next season. If you want to connect with me, I would love to hear from you. You can find me on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter and I’m “Paula Whidden” everywhere you look. 

 

If you would like to connect with other like minded moms, come join the Bible Momming group on Facebook. 

 

I know you have plenty of things pulling at your time, so thank you for listening. And remember, Love is patient and love is kind and that is never more real than in our families.