0:04

Hi, everyone.

0:04

Welcome back to another episode of Big Moon.

0:07

Hi. How are you doing? How's your health? Unclench

0:10

your jaw? Loosen your shoulders. Sit up

0:12

straight. Fucking crooked ass bitch. You

0:14

scoliosis bitch. Shape like

0:16

another ass bitch. Now A

0:18

leather s Did you say leather? Letter s

0:21

bitch? Yeah. Her leather. It was, like, a leather

0:23

Like, white leather skin and leather to

0:25

you. the ampersand

0:27

fucking shaped dish. I'm

0:30

surprised you hear that word. Right. Good for

0:32

you. I brain goo. You're kinda sometimes.

0:35

God, I'm decent looking, though, otherwise. One

0:38

of my favorite might be rough for you.

0:40

One of my favorite insults for dumb people

0:42

to take You you should marry Rich.

0:45

Yes. That's like, bless your heart. Yeah.

0:47

You should marry Rich. Hey,

0:49

Hal. Who do we have here? We have

0:51

our big star from Austin,

0:53

Texas. Oh, so I'm a big star. because everyone

0:56

misses you all the time. because I'm just gone

0:58

a lot. You miss what you don't have. No. If

1:00

I was here all the time, they would be like, god. Togo's

1:02

bish to shut up. No. Because they appreciate

1:04

your opinion. They think you're funny. Yeah.

1:06

Big. Who is it? Justin? Yeah.

1:09

I thought I would change your name on my phone.

1:11

What do you have? What am I listed as?

1:13

It's your old nickname. Jessica.

1:15

Yeah. You know how many fucking years it's been

1:17

since now? don't matter. That's

1:20

fame. Just Let me Nicky still has me as

1:23

Tiff j k news or I don't

1:25

remember now. That's hilarious. I

1:27

fame people stuff like, pretty instantly

1:30

if my relationship with them changes. Oh,

1:32

really? Yeah. Sometimes I'll change I'll change

1:34

it into, like, Minas

1:36

Bige. No. Don't

1:40

answer ass bitch. That's

1:42

fantastic. And also who else do we have? Oh, yeah. I mean,

1:44

Tiff. Yeah. And then also who

1:46

else we have? Niobr. Niobr.

1:49

Yeah. He doesn't talk. He's looking himself.

1:51

He's cleaning himself. He's being Clean.

1:53

He's a good boy. Okay.

1:55

So last last

1:58

episode that we filmed, we did relationship

2:00

advice. that we took

2:02

from Reddit posts because

2:04

they were so fucking juicy. It was really

2:06

just good. Yeah. was invested Yeah.

2:08

I wanted more. So we decided we're

2:11

gonna do more. Yeah. Because that's the

2:13

audience, but I kind of am in a way. Yeah.

2:15

I'm, like, your audience. And I want you to tell me more

2:17

of these stories. So hopefully, you guys are long for

2:19

the ride. Yeah. We just like

2:20

to judge people. You know? People have problems

2:22

with We're a Josie. We are so

2:24

she's molasses. You know, it's funny one

2:26

time when Isaac was little. He wanted

2:29

to know something. And I was like,

2:31

no Isaac. Like, you're too young. You can't

2:33

know or whatever. He goes,

2:34

Fame on, mom. You know me. You know

2:36

you. You know us. You know the way

2:38

we are. I'm like, oh, it's negotiating.

2:41

Where did he come up with you too?

2:43

Where are we like to

2:44

gossip? Yeah. He's like, you know, we're nosy

2:46

pretty much. And oh my Mood. Ever since he

2:48

said that, I think he was like, eight or something.

2:50

Since then, like, that's, like, my favorite thing

2:52

-- Oh. -- to say every time, like, every time he I

2:54

wanna know something of his. He's,

2:57

like, no, fame. It's okay. And I'm, like, Come

2:59

on, I said, you know you know me, you

3:01

know you know you know the way we are.

3:03

It sounds like he was watching mafia Mood, like,

3:05

come on. Yeah. Yeah. We're family. Yeah.

3:07

Yeah. You're mine. I'm yours. Just tell me.

3:10

Yeah. Just me, you know. You can tell me. so

3:12

cute. Yeah. But he's gonna be little

3:14

too small, so he's here in please. Okay.

3:17

So Lovely. pulled up a bunch

3:19

of posts that I thought sounded interesting

3:21

just by the title. I'm going

3:23

into this blind too. I don't know what's going on.

3:25

And we're gonna judge these people, give them relationship

3:28

advice. Keep in mind that they're not just romantic

3:30

relationships. It's friendships, family, all that

3:32

stuff.

3:33

Alright. The first one I found is

3:35

it

3:37

just looking at it makes me

3:39

laugh. My friend

3:40

and I have a YouTube channel together. People

3:43

think I'm the ugly one. Aw.

3:46

Okay. How old how old are these

3:48

kids? People

3:50

think that comes up subsidy they have. Are you even

3:52

worthy of us talking about you? Oh,

3:54

like John. who I Jenna,

3:57

we don't get views anymore. You can't talkin' like

3:59

this. Sure.

3:59

because you're on TV doesn't mean we can

4:02

talk like this. You're lucky where you're

4:04

talking about you. Anyways, pay us our fee because we're

4:06

promoting you right now. He's kidding. That's

4:08

silly. Oh, a piece and I'm So that's one of the

4:10

major realities of YouTube and one of the reasons

4:12

why I was, like, always so fucked

4:14

up looking in every vlog that I was on of

4:16

my exes

4:17

because when

4:18

you get the public telling

4:20

you everything about you, where's your upper

4:22

lip? Why is your forehead so big?

4:24

Why is your skin so big? Why? All

4:26

this shit? Like, just you you just get barraged

4:29

with all the things that are not absolutely

4:31

perfect about you. And I think it's just

4:33

because, like, either they were picked on a

4:35

little bit or, like, it's

4:37

easy to kinda, like, it's entertaining

4:40

to, like or maybe they don't know, like There's

4:42

no reason or because we're losing there's just, like,

4:44

yeah. So that's Mood. When people

4:46

always kids now, they wanna be famous. I'm like, you

4:48

don't know what you're signing up for. physical

4:50

appearance that they nitpick. It's your entire

4:52

personality. Yeah. It's your anything that

4:54

you give. Yeah.

4:55

It's wrong. But it is And then you start

4:57

to lose yourself. Yeah. You start to self

4:59

edit. Yeah. You're like, who the fuck am I?

5:01

You can

5:02

kinda go crazy. Like -- Yep. -- thinking

5:04

about what everyone is saying about

5:06

you. She's the ugly one now apparently,

5:08

which that could be totally different

5:10

depending on the year. What's

5:12

in trend? what's in fashion. One

5:15

year, the black girls are ugly the next year.

5:17

They're the the top shit and the white girls are ugly.

5:19

Like, this stuff is just ridiculous. It's

5:21

not based in reality. Yeah. It comes from

5:23

like,

5:24

severe insecurity because

5:27

I

5:27

feel like they look at you and they're like, oh,

5:29

she's famous. Why? What fuck her? Like Yeah.

5:31

She's good. I have

5:32

brown eyes. fucking She's got a pointy

5:34

nose.

5:34

Yeah. She's no upper lip. Why does that

5:37

person get confused, but not me. Right.

5:39

It's because she's blue eyes, man. Fuck blue eyes.

5:41

Yeah. I hate to blue eyes. like it's like that. It's like

5:43

deep insecurities -- Yeah. -- hit and

5:45

then, like, it's a hide behind their computer

5:47

too. But it's -- Exactly. -- anonymity.

5:49

Mhmm. Like, I think, like, why does that

5:51

person

5:51

get to be famous but not me? I

5:53

think that all

5:54

gets to fame. Either. It's just, like,

5:56

literal like just okay. So

5:58

my cousin in Mexico, she

6:01

has had a YouTube channel since she was,

6:03

like, in middle school. And

6:05

this is and she's already, like

6:08

oh, she's, like, twenty six,

6:10

I think, twenty five.

6:12

Anyway, So a long, long, long time

6:14

ago. Before everyone had a YouTube

6:16

channel, like, she she had her own thing. She was

6:18

trying to do, like, makeup and, like,

6:20

DIY stuff, and she

6:22

was just she had her own little corner of the

6:24

Internet carved out for herself and, like,

6:26

whoever would follow her and her channel,

6:29

like, wasn't big or anything, but she just had,

6:31

like, her own little thing. And

6:33

bitches at her school kept picking

6:35

on her and saying, like, oh, what

6:37

do you think you're that important? Like, you think

6:39

you're that cute? Like, you think, like,

6:41

people actually wanna hear what you have to say,

6:43

and, like, they would bully her all the

6:45

time. And also my cousin, like,

6:47

she's not,

6:48

like, you know, traditionally,

6:51

like, shaped, you know, she's, like, a

6:53

a bigger girl. So she would end up that

6:55

as traditional. You know what I

6:57

mean? Like, for the standards of what

7:00

is, like, acceptable or whatever.

7:02

She's on For many media. For many media.

7:04

For media. That's what I mean. Thank you for

7:06

clarifying. So for my cousin, she would end

7:08

up getting bullied for

7:09

her weight Mood. And like saying, like,

7:12

why does anyone wanna see a big

7:14

girl, like, on YouTube? Like, what

7:16

are you doing? like, oh, you're doing makeup tutorials.

7:18

You don't even know how to do your makeup,

7:20

like, literally just tearing

7:22

her apart and my I love my

7:24

cousin because she was always, I can't go

7:26

fuck with their fame though. Like, literally, I don't care. I'm

7:28

still gonna have my YouTube channel. I I don't

7:30

I don't care that. I don't have a million subscribers

7:33

I this is what I do, and I really love

7:35

it. And it's my passion. I have fun. I wanna

7:37

keep going. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, yeah. Good for

7:39

you. That's pretty strong. God, this reminds me of when

7:41

I nineteen years Mood. And I

7:43

was, like,

7:44

you know, like, back then Facebook, like, you post whatever.

7:46

You post whatever or anything you want. I remember I posted

7:48

a picture of my nails. Like, I just my nails. He was so

7:50

happy because I was super into it back then.

7:52

And there's this girl named Alex that

7:54

was like,

7:55

she she just commented. She was

7:57

my friend's girlfriend that was around all the

7:59

fame. And

8:00

she commented, I'm so fucking

8:02

sick of this, Nobody gives a fuck about

8:04

your nails or anything. What's the

8:06

Like, you you're like a teal teal tequila wannabe.

8:08

You're not famous. Nobody cares for me. I

8:10

wish you all. off like that. And this is

8:12

when, like, in this beginning of my career

8:14

when I was, like, modeling you know, I

8:16

was go good dancing, so I was like, just

8:18

starting off, you know, and Instagram shows, like,

8:20

trying to bring you down and Yeah. She's

8:22

like, I don't nobody gives fuck about you

8:24

Gina. And then I messaged you. I was

8:26

like, whoa. Okay.

8:29

Yeah. What was that? She goes, you have

8:31

nothing of substance and blah, blah, blah, nobody

8:33

cares. I'm like, You're on Facebook looking

8:35

for substance. Yeah.

8:39

Anyways, I found out later she was

8:41

a massive druggie and I'm better

8:43

than Sheila's healing now because I'm not a fucking There we

8:45

go.

8:45

Tails Tails a lot more

8:47

than a racist. She had a lot going on.

8:48

Same. No. No. No. She's, like, a little mental unstable.

8:51

Yeah. Alright. Let's get into it. So the topic

8:53

is, my friend and I have a YouTube channel

8:55

together. People think, I'm the ugly

8:57

one. We're both eighteen plus. Our

8:59

channel has just under ten

9:01

thousand subs. I'm calling my friend

9:03

Sarah, which is not her real name. I'm just being

9:05

vague. I always knew that I wasn't the pretty

9:07

We've been friends since we were really young and I've seen her

9:09

go from awkward kids really really

9:11

pretty. In school, people always ask

9:13

her out and they do extra stuff

9:15

for her. that she never seemed to

9:17

notice. I used to be jealous, but we've

9:19

talked about it and how I felt about it back

9:21

then. I have a boyfriend who makes

9:23

me feel beautiful now, etcetera. I thought I was

9:25

over it. Recently, since we gained

9:27

more subscribers, people have been making comments

9:29

about how set it must be to be the ugly

9:31

one. Jesus. Some of them

9:33

say my name, but most of them talk about my

9:35

features that make it obvious that they're talking about

9:37

me. I've even had people

9:39

privately messaged me to suggest plastic

9:41

surgery. Oh my god. That's the

9:43

Internet for you. Do y'all

9:44

wanna be famous? You really don't

9:47

want this shit. It's hurting my relationship with

9:49

Sarah. I know she's prettier than me, but

9:51

until this it wasn't really a problem

9:53

anymore. Being compared to her constantly is

9:55

hurtful. She suggests that we both

9:57

make

9:57

our Instagram's private and make a joint

9:59

public

9:59

one so that we can better control the new

10:02

hatred towards me. I'm worried that we'll

10:04

just bring up questions and I'll have to explain

10:06

that I'm so hurt by people saying this stuff

10:08

and it's damaging my friendship so much. that

10:10

we've both had to be private. She

10:12

even suggested that if it gets too bad,

10:14

we could phase out the channel because

10:16

it's not worth becoming bitter towards each other

10:18

because of YouTube. I just want to

10:20

know how to feel better about being friends with

10:22

her. Sarah's never made me feel ugly. It's

10:24

always been other people. She's the kindest

10:26

person I know and it makes me even more annoyed because I know she

10:28

doesn't have control over this anymore than I do.

10:30

I'm not gonna tell him on the channel. It's insanely

10:32

unlikely that you'll be interested in our

10:34

very niche subject. Mhmm. And I'd find it

10:36

really uncomfortable that certain fans knew what

10:38

I was dealing with before I'm ready to speak out about

10:40

it publicly. Also, I think it would count

10:42

as self advertising, and I don't want the post to

10:44

be deleted. Mhmm. Yeah. I mean This

10:47

was posted two years ago, so later

10:49

YouTube. That just also in general in

10:51

life. Like, being the ugly one, you have to

10:53

deal with it. Like, there's there's

10:55

pretty privilege. There's pretty privilege

10:57

it exists. And

10:58

then it's fucked up.

11:01

Like, I don't know why you would if you're

11:03

having this much of a hard time, like, why

11:05

you wanna continue. Yeah. because,

11:07

like, nothing like, what are you gonna do to

11:09

change it? either have to love yourself entirely

11:11

and know, like, not everyone is the

11:13

hot one, not everyone is the smart one, not

11:15

everyone is the bombshell not

11:17

everyone. You know what I mean? Like, whatever

11:19

your strength is, like, you It's

11:21

a funny one. Whatever it is.

11:23

We're like the the the smart one, the one

11:25

that, like, you know, there's there's like a an

11:27

angle for you, and you matter more

11:29

than just what you look like. Right. So it's

11:31

like if you're only focused, on

11:33

what you look like and that's your only value because

11:35

your friend is the hot one, then it's like

11:37

you're never gonna enjoy this. You might

11:39

as well stop. Yeah. Like, because it's only gonna get

11:41

worse. The more subscribers you get it, the more

11:43

fucking assholes start flooding in.

11:45

Like,

11:45

it's gonna get worse. Yeah. So it's definitely

11:48

internal. Pleasure. It's something

11:49

you're gonna have to do it. That's exactly

11:52

my take on it too where it's like

11:54

if she's it's either a deal with it

11:56

on your own

11:57

or just phase

11:58

yourself out of the channel or

11:59

phase the channel out. And the fact that the friend

12:02

is so supportive

12:04

and so loving and so empathetic is so

12:06

awesome that she's has such a good friend.

12:09

But yeah. Like, for her to

12:11

not deal

12:12

with it though, like, internally,

12:15

because never gonna control what people

12:17

say about you. That's

12:18

never -- Yeah. -- because never gonna

12:21

be that ugly. It's the it's the thing. It's

12:23

like she's probably, like, looks like

12:25

everybody else if she she probably could have a glow up

12:27

or something, but she just feels ugly

12:29

too. And that's just like, this

12:31

is a bigger problem than, like, what some

12:33

commenters are saying, like, oh, I'm the ugly one, like,

12:35

and this is a problem. It's like,

12:37

she's probably still also super pretty. You

12:39

know what I mean? It's just doesn't believe it now or

12:41

something. You know what I mean? Yeah. Or even if

12:43

she's not super pretty, then it's like she's

12:45

got value beyond that. This is for

12:47

some reason She's

12:48

focusing way too much on this. But this because everyone

12:50

does obviously focus too much on that.

12:52

But it's like we all

12:53

like, even

12:54

the prettiest thing too, like, that fame.

12:57

Right? Like, we're all gonna be,

12:59

like,

12:59

ugly and ignored. Like, at some point, like,

13:01

we're people are gonna stop and they kill myself. They're

13:03

gonna stop noticing us. when

13:05

we walk around. Right? Like, we're gonna get we're gonna

13:07

be the old person who's ugly and

13:09

wrinkly and saggy and and, like,

13:11

then what? Then we don't matter now or whatever.

13:13

So it's just, like, we gotta deal with, like, we're gonna

13:15

lose whatever it is that we think is so valuable

13:17

anyways. Yeah. So this also

13:19

comes down to, like, I

13:21

mean,

13:21

I say this all the fame, being a

13:25

public figure really is not for

13:27

everyone. It's not. It's so

13:29

fucking hungry. Even for the really pretty

13:31

people -- Yeah. -- like the absolute tens,

13:33

they get fucking obliterated

13:35

constantly as well. There is no way

13:37

to satisfy by the public. Mhmm. Like,

13:39

the most successful with

13:41

millions of followers on social Mood, they're

13:43

still getting fucking chat on --

13:45

Yeah. hundreds of times a day. Yeah. It's not

13:47

made for everyone. You know, like, it's like, some

13:50

people handle it better. Like, people come up to like,

13:52

how do you handle all this

13:54

on you. I'm like, because I

13:55

just really don't care, but not everyone's like me and

13:57

not everyone's like us that can handle this. So

13:59

if I mean, I can't even really handle it. I mean,

14:01

like, girl, being a well, you're getting, like,

14:03

a fucking seven on the Internet is

14:05

hard enough. Like, I can't imagine being, like, a

14:08

four and a female and, like, trying

14:10

to, like, and then still being insecure

14:12

and caring about that is my angle. Like, you

14:14

can't. Like, you gotta let that go. Like, you're

14:16

it's not gonna change. Like, if you're not a ten, you

14:18

just gotta let it go. Well You know what I

14:20

mean? Like, you still have value though. Yeah.

14:22

Absolutely. Yeah. That's why like,

14:25

because I'm not one of those people that I'm

14:27

cut out for this. I just wanna,

14:29

like, phase myself out Mood, because I'm,

14:31

like, okay. Like, I didn't really wanna be

14:33

entered into this space. Today, I

14:35

went for a beauty contest. So I'm,

14:37

like, litages. smooth.

14:37

Yeah. I was

14:38

like, okay. Well, I entered this

14:41

space. Let me give you my

14:43

everything. And then, like,

14:45

dealing

14:45

with how it was received. A

14:47

lot of people loved it. A lot of people hated it.

14:50

I'm

14:50

just like, well, this is a lot, and I can't handle

14:52

this. So let me just Go

14:54

in my little corner. Yeah.

14:56

I see, like, the follower count dwindling.

14:59

Mhmm. The views dwindling. Yeah.

15:01

And that, it should make

15:03

me, like, really worried, but

15:05

actually makes me feel relieved. Right. Yeah.

15:07

Like, oh, okay. Cool. Yeah.

15:09

Like, less people less

15:11

people are waiting for you. and Waiting

15:13

to comment, waiting to shit on you, like,

15:15

waiting to fuck it out. Yeah. It

15:17

feels like it feels like

15:19

I'm I'm not, like,

15:21

being grasped anymore I don't know how to

15:23

describe it. Yeah. But it feels like,

15:25

relieving a little bit. But like

15:27

I said, I I should definitely scare me because this

15:29

is my livelihood. Yeah. and

15:32

I fame supposed to continue

15:34

to want to be relevant. Mhmm.

15:36

But I'm just like I'm tired. Yeah.

15:38

It takes its toll on people. For personally,

15:41

I still love it so much.

15:43

Like, I'm still very heavily into this, not only just

15:45

social media but now on television. Yeah.

15:47

You know? And

15:50

I can honestly say it's like,

15:52

those things stop bothering me, like, maybe a

15:54

decade ago because it's like, The

15:56

way I see it is, like I said earlier, it's

15:58

a deep insecurity with them,

16:00

and that's their problem. Mhmm.

16:02

And two, it doesn't bother my

16:04

bank account at all. And three, the

16:06

way like, sometimes I think of it, like,

16:08

oh my god, there's all these people who talked all this

16:10

shit about me saying I'm this

16:12

and I'm that. but then things have just

16:14

been getting better. Like, my career has just

16:16

gotten better. So clearly, what they say just

16:18

really does not matter at all. Yeah. So it's

16:21

like it's two different mindsets here, you know. Like, it's not made

16:23

for everyone and some people thrive in this.

16:25

Yeah. Right? So for,

16:27

like, these two,

16:29

ten thousand right now, it's

16:31

it's not a lot compared to,

16:33

like, you know, how YouTube algorithm Once you get to, like,

16:35

a hundred thousand two hundred, like, the the

16:37

amount of comments are gonna get worse. Yeah. And,

16:39

like, the and then how nasty there It's

16:41

gonna get worse because they feel like

16:43

they they disappear in the crowd. Yeah. Like,

16:45

they get to spew their hatred and

16:47

ugliness, assuming -- Yeah. -- so it's crazy. Oh,

16:49

yeah. Either they want you to hear it or they don't

16:51

think you will. But no way, it's like it's they

16:53

feel like they get drowned in the crowd, but

16:55

it's still very like, you know, it's not.

16:57

Oh, yeah. There's been so many comments

17:00

where people will talk shit, and I'd I'd

17:02

I'd respond sometimes because And they're like, oh, I

17:04

was like, oh, I didn't see

17:06

these stuff. It's like so you only did

17:08

this because you thought you would drown in the crowd. You're a

17:10

little coward. Yeah. You know? But like I

17:12

was saying earlier, ten thousand right now is,

17:14

like, still in the lower numbers. And if it's

17:16

hard for you to deal with it now. Yeah. It's

17:18

only getting worse. Only get worse.

17:20

Yep. So either you work

17:22

on this yourself and you really understand

17:24

these people really don't matter or

17:26

maybe this just isn't the right

17:28

path for you, you know. Yeah. Either

17:31

way, you're still worthy. Like,

17:33

you're still beautiful. Yeah. because it's really gonna be

17:35

on you. Like,

17:35

your friend is not doing anything

17:37

wrong. She's not, like, making you feel a type of

17:39

way. Like, you're gonna be your

17:40

own self destruction. And then it

17:42

clearly was already in the past in their in their

17:45

history. Mhmm. And the friend's just

17:47

like, oh, I was like, I don't know.

17:48

I'm sorry. I I'll support you. We can

17:50

shut

17:50

the channel down it's not

17:52

as important as -- Yeah. -- our friendship, your

17:54

mental health, like -- Yeah. -- she's in there.

17:56

The thing is, like, they could potentially

17:59

they have a good

17:59

chemistry and they're actually really entertaining. She could wind up being really

18:02

fucking successful if she could just,

18:04

like, figure out a way to get through this.

18:06

Mhmm. But even I can't

18:08

figure out a way to get through

18:10

public opinion. So,

18:10

like, I would let it go too.

18:13

Like, I kind of am. It's it's like it's so hard

18:15

even I can't do it. know what I'm

18:17

saying?

18:17

Yeah. Top comments is having a public appearance on YouTube and other

18:19

social medias mean you are going to be scrutinized.

18:22

There are going to be hateful and hurtful comments from

18:24

anonymous drones. lot of

18:26

them are just trolling or looking at a

18:28

reaction. Dan Harmon talks about this on

18:30

his podcast. A lot

18:32

of celebrities celebrities even do

18:34

this. They still they avoid social

18:36

media for this very reason -- Mhmm. -- as it

18:38

takes toll on your mental health. Mhmm.

18:40

It will only get worse as you get more popular, so you

18:42

are going to need to figure out a game plan to save

18:44

your mental health if you decide to

18:46

pursue this. Here are some

18:48

suggestions. One, avoid the comments. Yeah. Have Sarah

18:50

or someone else read through the comments and give you the

18:52

filter version. Two, turn off

18:54

comments where possible. Three,

18:56

go into therapy and build your tool tool set

18:58

to be able to handle these comments in a

19:00

more productive manner. Ultimately, you

19:02

cannot handle the crappy comments

19:04

then maybe it's if you if you cannot,

19:07

then maybe it's time to evaluate if

19:09

it's worth it. Mhmm. Even

19:11

Conan O'Brien says how much

19:13

he hates getting bad press and reading

19:15

bad press about himself. He

19:17

avoids it so much. He said he

19:19

has his own staff pick the

19:21

nicest articles about him and only those are sent

19:23

his way. So even if, like, a

19:25

celebrity, like, you're not wrong for feeling

19:27

this. Right. So celebrities go through this

19:30

too. you know, and even they have to put implement things --

19:32

Mhmm. -- you know, in their career to

19:34

not let this affect them as much.

19:36

Mhmm. So -- Yeah. -- but also,

19:39

like, having

19:39

gone through it, it's almost like it I

19:41

may sound like completely, like,

19:43

not sympathetic at all. Mhmm. But I think

19:46

it's just because there is

19:48

nothing you can do -- Yeah. -- to

19:50

change the outside

19:51

world. Yeah. And it's like it's cut and dry. This

19:53

is a black and white.

19:54

It's either you deal with it or you

19:56

need to get the fuck out because it is rough.

19:59

Mhmm. So

20:00

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20:02

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20:04

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20:06

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23:23

He's

23:24

thirty three. She's twenty seven.

23:26

He says, my fiance chose to

23:29

save my deceased father's stuff over her

23:31

deceased mother's stuff in a

23:33

fire. How can I ever repay her? jeez.

23:35

Wait. Wait. Why is this a problem? Why

23:37

is this a problem? It's like, I don't know how to

23:39

repay her for

23:40

her day. It's just so sweet.

23:43

just really cute,

23:43

but I don't know. Like She must have,

23:45

like, been, like, my relationship

23:47

with my mom was whatever's Who

23:49

knows? You love your dad. way more than I

23:51

love my mom. Where if they love well, she loved

23:53

her mom so much too, but she's like

23:56

That shows him over here. Wait,

23:58

fiance? fiance. Okay.

24:00

Two nights ago, my fiance

24:02

accidentally set fire to our kitchen, and the fire

24:04

extinguisher in our apartment was defective. The

24:06

fire spread quickly and burned through most of the building before

24:08

they were able to chain it. I wasn't home, so

24:10

I wasn't there to help my girlfriend gather anything. If I

24:12

was, I would have forced her outside and told her to

24:14

leave it all. just stuff. She chose

24:16

differently. First, she took out the two

24:18

dolls outside and hand them all to a neighbor. Then she

24:20

went back in at this point, the kitchen was in golfing

24:22

flames and she couldn't make it to a living Mood.

24:25

But she could get into the bedroom. She knew she wouldn't be able

24:27

to make two trips so she had to act fast.

24:29

Both of us lost our parents. I lost my

24:31

dad three years ago. He was a friend of her father,

24:33

so she knew him. though, not

24:35

very well. But he died before I actually met her. I

24:37

have most of my dad's stuff in storage unit, but in

24:39

our bedroom, I have his ashes, two

24:42

guns, and a couple of other very personal

24:44

things from my time with him. She lost her mom

24:46

as a teenager and because her father is an asshole,

24:48

she only has a few small things of her and

24:50

her wedding dress. Instead of choosing

24:52

to save a few things that she has of her

24:55

mom, she gathered up my father's things, wrapped

24:57

them in a sheet, and ran out the room. I don't even

24:59

know how to begin to say thank you. I'm so

25:01

completely devastated by her losing her mom's

25:03

things like that. And I can't imagine what

25:05

she was thinking or how much she really

25:07

must love me to make that

25:09

I don't know how to repay her or where to begin. Can anybody

25:11

think of a nice gesture? I can make it up

25:13

to her? She must be devastated. I

25:15

can't imagine losing the last bit of my dad.

25:18

I mean,

25:18

that's really sweet, but what I don't understand

25:20

is why you feel like you have

25:22

to repay her in some way. I

25:25

would feeling different.

25:27

I'm not prepared, but I've a way

25:29

to make her There are some I appreciate it.

25:31

There are some things that you cannot

25:34

repay if that makes sense. It's

25:37

like, you can't ever

25:38

get

25:40

back those things

25:42

and what could possibly be in

25:45

the place of your mother or her

25:47

possessions that you prized. So there is no what

25:49

do you get what do you mean? Repay her Like,

25:51

there's there's no way to do that. I

25:53

feel like there's definitely nothing that can ever

25:55

replace those, you know, those those

25:57

valuable things but I

25:59

think his way is just

26:00

like, what's

26:01

like, he's not

26:02

asking for what's enough, but more like,

26:05

what what are the Best things I can do,

26:07

like, do I write a letter? Say, thank you. Do I

26:09

get on my knees? And, like, you

26:11

know, hug her and cry or say, thank

26:13

you. I promise to eat your buckle every night, like, what,

26:15

you know, can even get I

26:17

know I wonder if the thing's close. Like her

26:19

mom's things were even, like, a

26:21

little bit, like, she she, like,

26:24

immediately thought to grab the boyfriend's

26:26

dad's things. Like, I don't know. That is you

26:28

know. That's either weird, like,

26:30

I mean, the fact that she still keeps it though means it means something to

26:32

her. Like, she loves her mom. Right. And

26:34

she doesn't have much. Yeah. Yeah. And

26:36

I don't know a wedding dress Mood. Like, shoes

26:39

and then Piante. She's gonna get married

26:41

Mood. Like, there's no I

26:43

don't

26:43

know. To me, it's weird that he's, like, going on

26:45

the Internet and asking how can I repay her. Like,

26:47

I get that this is so sweet and

26:49

he's so appreciative. But I'm like, just

26:52

be her husband, like, be a good

26:54

husband to her and, like but why I don't

26:55

know why this needs

26:57

Mood tit for tat. It's like,

26:59

why does this why does

27:01

he need to do something now? Yeah. You know

27:03

what I mean? Like, I find that a

27:05

weird reaction, but maybe I'm just weird. I

27:07

think it's sweet. Like, he and he's like, I'm gonna make

27:09

her brownies and that's gonna repay her. Like,

27:11

what is the what

27:12

do you think is what's the answer to

27:15

that? There is nothing. It's

27:15

like gotta just be her fucking be the best husband you

27:18

can be. Yeah. It's I think it's, you know,

27:20

obviously, it's out of being so

27:22

sweet. Like, I

27:24

understand

27:24

the sentiment. The truth of

27:26

the matter is there will be nothing that can replace

27:28

all. Yeah. But I like

27:30

that he even carries He's asking

27:33

for ideas on how to it make another brand

27:35

face. So he wants ideas on

27:37

how to, like, make some grand gesture because she

27:39

feels like yeah. He feels like

27:41

that she made Mhmm. Sometimes I

27:43

feel that way. Like, when someone does something

27:45

so sweet for me, I'm like, oh my Like,

27:48

I have to do something back in the You feel indebted, but

27:50

I don't know. I just don't think

27:52

that that's how you go about having

27:54

a marriage is like being indebted to

27:56

each other because one person did something -- Mhmm.

27:58

--

27:58

grand. Mhmm. They hadn't

27:59

done it. Just show appreciations. Some people are just

28:02

not good at showing appreciation. Yeah. Mhmm.

28:04

You know? So top comment says clearly

28:06

in that moment, she chose to save what she loves

28:08

most of all, your heart and your

28:10

happiness. I think she thought to yourself to save

28:12

what she had left, which is

28:14

you, She has all of her memories wrapped up inside her. She didn't know

28:16

what losing your dad's stuff would do to you so she

28:18

decides to risk it and protect you. God

28:20

damn. That's powerful. you better

28:22

marry that girl, just spend the rest of your life treating her right.

28:25

Right. See? Yeah. Yeah. So that's something. But

28:27

obviously, I'm sure he would So he just wants

28:29

to do something nice

28:31

for her, I guess. But it's weird to me

28:33

that he has to, like, ask other people what to

28:35

do. Like, do it from your heart. I think that's

28:37

what's bothering

28:37

me. He's like, why are you asking strangers? What

28:39

you should use for your I think some people Whatever you think

28:41

of.

28:41

I think some people just aren't good at that,

28:43

especially like there are some men who just don't know how

28:45

to show love very well.

28:48

Mhmm. So -- Yeah. -- getting a

28:50

little help doesn't hurt. I would

28:52

definitely be writing it to the Internet and, like,

28:54

help me figure something out because

28:56

I don't know. Like, Yeah.

28:58

I

28:58

find it strange. I would I I

29:00

think it's sweet that he appreciates

29:02

it. Mhmm. But just I feel like this whole

29:04

situation is Yeah. Some people just aren't good at it.

29:06

Yeah. No matter that to me, if I knew that he, like,

29:08

went to the Internet and asked a bunch of people, what

29:10

should I do? I'd be like, just

29:12

fuck it. Don't just don't I don't need whatever you're gonna

29:15

contrived thing or you asked a stranger

29:17

to do for me. Like, just be a really good

29:19

fucking husband. Yeah.

29:21

You know, like, I just wanted to get a sense of he was asking,

29:23

like, if there was any, like,

29:25

pieces of, like, burnt

29:28

something -- Yeah. -- that she that he can, like --

29:30

Yeah. -- try to gather and be like, hey, I

29:32

know this isn't the same thing, but

29:34

I -- Mhmm. -- made, like, this really fireproof,

29:36

nice box for your mom's things

29:38

that are ashes now. Or like a shred of

29:40

the wedding dress and put it in, like, a heart

29:42

locket or something. Yeah. one said the

29:44

comment said my side note. It

29:47

would be nice to get something engraved with her mother's

29:49

My best friend's husband got her.

29:51

a ring mom's engraved on the inside and their birthstone side by

29:53

side in the band. So it's, like, even

29:55

little things, you know. Like, guys are

29:58

sometimes

29:58

Maybe they're just so

29:59

bad at It's annoying me that they're so

30:02

bad at thinking of things on their own. Mhmm. Maybe

30:04

that's why I'm annoyed. Yeah. No.

30:06

Like, if you wanna do something, think of it

30:08

yourself. Like, I don't know. I

30:09

mean Okay. You're really hard.

30:12

This this I don't blame him for asking for help.

30:14

Yeah. I don't blame him. Second

30:16

comment says, this is going me sound corny but there may

30:18

be no way to repay her. Mhmm. Just be

30:20

there for her and show her your

30:22

appreciation through actions and behaviors. Mhmm.

30:24

In terms of those actions, is there any way you can salvage any carbon

30:26

based products that you use? Yeah. So

30:28

that's what so that speaks out to me. Just

30:30

be there for her and show her your appreciation. Which

30:33

for us seems the obviously. Yeah.

30:36

But for him, it might seem like

30:38

that's just not enough. Like, how do you show

30:40

the appreciation? Yeah. Or how, like, Am I

30:42

doing enough? You know? because

30:44

if this

30:44

happened to me, obviously,

30:46

I would know there's no way I can

30:48

do enough, but sometimes I just

30:50

need to hear the

30:51

most simple answers. Mhmm. Next

30:53

one is I think okay.

30:55

I think what's it's to going back

30:57

to it because I'm like, why is this bothering me? I

30:59

think it feels

31:00

like it's it's

31:01

bordering along the lines of like conditional love.

31:04

Like I did this thing for you.

31:06

It's it's teetering

31:07

towards that to me. Like like I

31:09

need a tit for tat that we're equal

31:11

or that we're even now? Or, like,

31:13

like, little conditions, like, oh, like, if you do something

31:15

now, I gotta do something. Then you do something now, I gotta do something. And

31:17

then it just feels like we're just, like, doing

31:20

things just to do things, and it goes down

31:22

this, like, long list of, like, I

31:23

don't know. I don't know. It seems genuine to

31:25

me. It's not like, oh, she did this so I have to do

31:27

it. Right. She did this. Oh

31:30

my god. How can I show her that? Thank

31:32

you. I love you so much. It's not like, I have to do

31:34

the back girls. It will be We're not gonna be. Yeah.

31:36

Yeah. I don't know. I'm gonna owe her.

31:38

Yeah. Like, I owe her. I'm indebted to you.

31:40

No. Just to the it was so

31:42

annoying. And I can't figure out why. I don't know what it is.

31:44

Maybe I'll figure out later, but I'm like, this is so

31:46

annoying. The fact that he's so I

31:48

think I know maybe where that's

31:50

coming from. Okay.

31:50

For you What do you think it

31:51

is? I think because in, like, in

31:53

your past and, like, especially in

31:56

relationships, it really was, like, I

31:58

did this, so now you owe me this.

32:00

And so, like, it's just you felt

32:02

indebted and you're just like, I don't wanna

32:04

be under anyone's fucking --

32:06

Mhmm. -- What do you call it? I don't

32:08

know. It it feels imprisoning. Yeah.

32:10

Like, being imprisoned. Like, someone

32:11

does a gesture and now you have to fucking figure

32:13

some shit out. Like, now you're yeah. Maybe it's a

32:15

personal thing. You're making Why do

32:17

you gotta do something back? Like, I just love

32:20

you. You know? Yeah. Yeah. That

32:22

could be it. Yeah. Yeah. because if that was

32:24

her, I'm not gonna lie. Like, I saved

32:26

your stuff. And if all you said was, oh

32:28

my god. Thank you. I'd be

32:29

like, okay. What I

32:32

mean,

32:32

I wasn't like it's not like I'm

32:35

expecting like, you should do something for fame. Well, I don't think

32:37

that I'm I wouldn't

32:39

do it as, like, oh, thanks. Yeah. I'll

32:41

hand it like that, but it's just,

32:43

like, once you express emotion with your words and, like,

32:45

oh my Mood, I can't believe you actually say my stuff over

32:47

yours and, like, thank you so much. Like but then

32:49

it's just, like, Now you gotta go on the Internet and figure

32:52

out this grand fucking gesture

32:54

that's gonna be good enough. For maybe

32:56

for him, it just doesn't seem like

32:58

enough. Like, there's -- Yeah. -- he loves her so

33:00

much for himself. Yeah. It was such a big

33:02

thing for him. Right. You know? Suddenly it

33:04

was it was probably just, like, triggering the

33:06

wrong part of me versus, like, I'm,

33:08

like, projecting onto him, being annoyed by it.

33:10

But Yeah. Maybe you're used to, like, things

33:12

being so

33:13

transactional that it's hard for you to

33:15

accept people can just do things out of kindness -- Right. Exactly.

33:17

-- which sucks. Yeah. Yeah.

33:20

Oh, I hate people who can make

33:22

you do things that make you feel

33:24

like that. Okay. My

33:26

step brother, sixteen years

33:28

old, came to my room. I'm sixteen

33:30

also to the goal sixteen. Step brother.

33:32

Yeah. Okay. step brother and she's a

33:34

female, sixteen year old female. My step brother

33:36

came to my room at night and cut my hair with

33:38

scissors. Oh my god. At

33:40

sixteen? That's some,

33:40

like, five year old

33:41

shit. Yeah. I moved out and my parents still

33:44

want me back or my parents want me back with

33:46

him still there. What?

33:48

Wait. Where Mood she move to? Who the fuck

33:50

would cut Why? Yeah.

33:50

That's really weird. What the fuck was I'm

33:52

wondering if he was justified anyway because she

33:55

probably fucked up or he's just fucking

33:57

insane. Okay. My

33:58

step brother of six

33:59

months, my

34:01

mom married his dad.

34:03

So a few weeks ago, in the morning, I noticed

34:05

my stuff in my room Mood been moved. I

34:07

told my brother, my actual biological full blood brother, he was

34:09

twenty three years old, and he didn't take

34:11

me seriously, but taught me how to record

34:13

my room at nights with

34:16

my phone. I've been recording myself every night and nothing happened. So I was ready to

34:18

believe that nothing had happened that night. Right. How should

34:20

do this? I wanna know how to do

34:22

this. Alright. This

34:23

week however, my step

34:25

brother came into my

34:26

room at around three fifteen AM. He came

34:28

to me with scissors, cut a small piece of my

34:30

hair and left my room. Oh, shit. So

34:33

it wasn't like a big chunk. It was like a

34:35

like a little witchcraft chunk. Yeah. Is it

34:37

like what I'm thinking? Angry big

34:40

chunk or creepy small chunk. He's

34:42

gonna eat it. That's

34:43

fucking weird.

34:44

It was so weird in

34:46

shocking. It was a very small amount. Nothing like

34:49

I wouldn't have or nothing that

34:51

I would have noticed. sent the video to

34:53

my siblings. I have a biological brother and I also have biological

34:55

sisters nineteen. They told me to pack it

34:57

back immediately and pick me up

34:59

and took me them. Oh. They sent

35:01

the video to That's where she went.

35:04

Mhmm. Parents question is that brother. He says he

35:06

doesn't remember doing it at all. He said he was

35:08

likely sleepwalking as to see a doctor.

35:09

some bullshit. Oh my god. This

35:11

bullshit was sure. I don't believe him and

35:13

neither do my siblings. Parents wanna solve

35:15

this problem by taking both of

35:17

us to family therapy. want

35:19

me to come home and discuss this, all of

35:21

us. Mhmm. They say I'm not in any

35:23

real day danger as he didn't hurt me or do

35:25

you think inappropriate or sexual This is a

35:28

real way. it. And we don't even

35:30

know yet if it's sexual or not. Exactly. My

35:32

siblings strongly disagree and say that

35:34

what he did was very inappropriate and

35:36

they're not let me go back there as long as my stepmother still lives there.

35:38

Yep. Parents say they will install a lock on

35:40

my door so that I can lock myself in at night.

35:42

Stepfather is upset at my siblings

35:44

and claims turned this into

35:46

a much larger issue than it is. Oh

35:48

my god. Bitch, your kid is

35:50

fucking psycho. Go handle your son.

35:52

He says that they could have just parentsied the

35:54

problem away punishing. It's not a big deal. Honestly, I

35:56

keep hearing everyone with strong opinions about

35:58

this. And I don't know who's right or wrong. What should

35:59

I do? Do I

36:02

go back I just never go back. My best my best friend says, I should go

36:04

to the police and press charges against that brother. I

36:06

don't think that's a that's a lot of

36:08

emails. Yeah.

36:10

What

36:10

though? I can't think of any situation where it's okay to cut

36:12

someone's hair while they're sleeping and

36:14

just taking your hair. Also, what

36:16

was the stuff that was moved around?

36:18

Like, what did that do

36:20

do you take something? Like, does she notice if It's

36:23

like a weird,

36:24

really, obsessive behavior

36:26

that could devolve into

36:30

something much worse. So, like, what's happened so far is not really that

36:32

bad yet. Right? Obviously, it's like,

36:34

okay. The end result is a piece of

36:36

her hair

36:38

is missing. Yeah. But it's, like, what it it's, like, what is to

36:40

come? Is what scary? Like,

36:42

what is this leading to? Why is he doing

36:44

this? And where is it

36:46

gonna go? Also, why does she need to live there? She's

36:48

sixteen? Yeah. But like but but

36:49

she's being taken care of by her siblings too.

36:51

I don't know. Maybe it's just like

36:54

a harder situation.

36:56

Like,

36:56

maybe it's just easier back at the other house,

36:58

but I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. That's

37:00

god. That's okay. First

37:01

of all, a lock on the door for

37:03

sure. Yeah. I feel like

37:05

I've always had locks on my door too, so I'm surprised that they don't

37:08

have locks already, but

37:08

didn't. I guess, some houses don't

37:11

have them. Especially when there's

37:12

boys, like teenage boys, teenage these

37:15

girls, not even blood related, like, we need

37:17

some privacy, we need some locks on the

37:19

doors. Yeah. So she says, I

37:22

guess, in the answer were there any other

37:24

problems she no problems that I know of. He certainly is a strange

37:26

person, but I wouldn't have said he was

37:28

creepy until this happened. I never felt I was in

37:30

danger around him. Someone

37:32

else says, hey, listen,

37:34

considering how your stepdad is trying to brush his

37:36

aside, I'm one hundred percent sure that there

37:38

has been other behaviors he has exhibited

37:40

that has been ignored by

37:42

his dad. He needs help. Yeah. You don't need to be put in danger. In the

37:44

meantime, stay with your siblings. Yeah.

37:46

Top comments are saying, listen to

37:48

your siblings.

37:50

Your mom wants you to just grin and bear it so she can have a

37:52

happy little along with her new husband. Mhmm.

37:54

Both of them are in denial over how

37:56

serious the situation is, you're a

37:58

step brother for sure he's therapy, but you do not

38:00

need to be in the house when that happens. Yeah.

38:02

Stay away. Oh, god. I'm so Yeah.

38:04

Everyone's creeped out by this guy. Yeah. But yeah.

38:06

fucking weird. Yeah. And, like, what else has his dad brushed up. Is there

38:08

any updates on this one? because I don't know what that's

38:11

just so weird to me that I don't even know.

38:13

I can't even guess what's Right?

38:15

Going on with this kid. There is no update on And what

38:17

what the fuck is up with the mom? She's

38:19

gonna take fame. There's so many moms like that.

38:21

So just keep the keys. Don't see.

38:24

Yeah. Well, selfish. Nothing was missing from any

38:26

time before he was in the room. This is the

38:28

salt. Your step out there is a creep in your -- Mhmm. --

38:30

not safe in

38:31

your own fame. stay with your siblings

38:33

-- Mhmm. -- you will most likely escalate his behavior and do other things to avoid while

38:35

you're asleep. That one made me

38:38

feel weird.

38:40

Mhmm. I feel gross. Mhmm. It's also it's triggering me Mhmm.

38:42

-- from my past

38:43

experiences. I used to have I used to

38:46

because my door didn't

38:49

have a lock. when I was a

38:51

And would lay out towels and

38:54

blankets in front of my closed door because my door

38:56

would open in. Right? Mhmm. So I lay out

38:58

towels and

39:00

blankets under my door just to make sure no one would walk in.

39:02

Well, they could still walk in.

39:04

Right? They're not yeah. But it to

39:06

know if they came in or No.

39:09

So then what would you well, did

39:11

did

39:11

anyone ever walk in and you saw that

39:13

the towels removed? Yeah. And then what?

39:15

I knew. Yeah. There was nothing else

39:17

I could do. Yeah. And

39:19

you're just, like I at least

39:21

it was, like, once Crazy. Yeah.

39:23

You're, like, proving to yourself that you weren't

39:25

crazy. Right? Yeah. Exactly. My

39:27

dad used to like, forbid us from going into his room because, like, we would all

39:29

mess up shit and jump in the bed and shit.

39:32

Yeah. So he so

39:34

while he was all at

39:34

work or before he left to work, his

39:37

trick was a single hair on

39:39

a table. And

39:40

if it's gone, that means

39:42

we were in his room. A single hair

39:45

Like, the AC can't No. You see, like, no. You see what I'm

39:47

gonna, like, pour back the AC or anything. So,

39:50

like, if someone came in, he would know. Or

39:52

he Mood my

39:54

brother once because my brother used to, like, in the middle of the night sneak into the

39:56

living room play video games. He

39:58

put giant globes of

40:00

Vaseline on the hand

40:02

game controller So he

40:04

would like, if my brother grabbed it, he still he'll

40:06

see, like, indentations and stuff in the basket.

40:08

Oh, that's a genius. Yeah.

40:10

That was really creepy. I would not wanna stay in the same

40:12

house. Fuck no. Fame I'm so fucking curious

40:14

to know what the fuck he's doing this

40:17

hair. Yes. And I'm also so

40:20

glad she has siblings to stay with.

40:22

Mhmm. She's not stuck in that house like that.

40:24

Yes. We're so. Alright. So in my

40:26

household, I have two trash

40:28

cans. One of them, it's a bigger one for

40:30

all the non food, like, not

40:32

wet stuff that won't stick up

40:34

the trash The second bin is for all the food

40:36

waste and that little trash

40:38

can, I cannot tell you how many times

40:40

even per day we have to throw

40:42

out that it's smaller

40:44

trash because it smells,

40:46

it fills up so quickly. Not a big

40:48

fan. I hate it. It's just been so

40:50

gross. So look about a

40:52

month ago, I received a

40:54

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40:56

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40:58

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41:01

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41:03

smell when it runs and it's super

41:05

quiet. I love the fact that Lomi

41:07

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41:09

scraps into dirt with a push of a

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41:14

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41:16

throw away out, like, two

41:18

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41:20

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41:22

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41:24

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41:26

up and about once every

41:28

two days I would say is when we

41:30

run it and I'm telling you it

41:32

does not smell that all and I

41:34

love fact that now we don't have to throw out a

41:37

stinky bag of garbage in the trash. Now

41:39

it's just this beautiful soil that I

41:41

can use for my potted

41:43

plants. And whenever I don't need soil for

41:45

my plants, I ended just throwing it in

41:47

the green garbage bin for landscape waste.

41:49

I don't know. Just made our

41:51

life at home so much easier, especially my

41:54

son loves it because he's in charge of

41:56

throwing out the trash and he just

41:58

loves only having to deal with

41:59

non stinky

42:00

dirt now. Our family really

42:03

loves it

42:03

and I honestly think it's a

42:06

great gift idea, you know, with the

42:08

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42:10

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42:12

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42:14

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42:20

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42:22

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42:24

like bags and bags of trash, but no, we

42:26

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42:28

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43:02

Next one. I, twenty nine year old male just

43:04

spent

43:04

another awkward holiday with my

43:07

girlfriend's bridge family. rich family

43:10

She's twenty eight year old female. Like, girlfriend and I have been together for almost three

43:12

years. Ninety nine percent of the time were great. She's

43:14

funny, smart, and we have a lot of shared interest,

43:16

but every time we visit her, we've

43:19

we visit her fame. I start

43:21

doubting everything. They are very wealthy, which

43:23

by itself isn't a bad thing, but they're

43:25

also very fixated on being rich and have

43:27

a habit of placing the monetary value on things or of things

43:29

and people over everything else. I came

43:32

from a very middle

43:34

class back around. I have a good

43:36

education and a decent career that I really

43:38

enjoy, but I'm definitely not rich. Because of

43:40

this, they view me as a loser. For

43:42

example, yesterday, we made the two hour

43:44

drive to our parents in my newish Honda. When we got there, my mom

43:46

immediately ordered me to park the car behind the house the

43:48

neighbors wouldn't see it. Like, her

43:50

Mood. Her mom. Yeah.

43:52

Yeah. She was

43:53

a Honda. Yeah. That's fine. There's

43:56

a lot of rich people that drive fucking

43:58

regular cars. Like, these are, like,

43:59

weird -- There's a insecure -- these are insecure

44:02

rich people because they're a ton of

44:04

very wealthy people. It's probably new money.

44:06

Yeah. It's a new money. Well, I don't know.

44:08

Some some triggered me on that. I'm like, there

44:10

I don't know. so many people. I grew up around rich people,

44:12

and a lot of them would have very base

44:14

or at least have, like, multiples or everything.

44:16

And then, like, they would also

44:19

often in times go into public with

44:21

the cheaper thing to kinda fit in or

44:23

whatever. You know, I've never known

44:25

anyone very wealthy. I grew up on an island,

44:27

so it was either poor people who were the workers or the rich fucking people who had

44:29

the mansion. Yeah. I know

44:32

myspace, Tom. You

44:34

too?

44:34

yeah Yes. he

44:36

used to fame my girlfriend. His daily is a fucking Prius.

44:38

Right. So these people are fucking

44:40

They're just weirdos. They're so stupid.

44:44

And plus if you go around LA and you go into, like, the really

44:46

rich areas, there's so many giant missions

44:48

-- Yeah. -- which is what they're There are stars

44:50

in the front. Yeah. Consane.

44:54

She was furious. We didn't the mom was furious. We didn't

44:56

bring the girlfriend's land rover, which they bought for her

44:58

as a birthday gift this year.

45:01

my

45:01

girlfriend doesn't like to drive long trips and I'm not allowed to

45:03

drive a land rover per her parents.

45:05

What? So we brought my Honda. They

45:07

actually fucking fall that

45:10

road. Wow. I

45:11

didn't even actually follow that rule.

45:13

Like Why I

45:15

see them in sufferers? Girlfriend's

45:17

Dad has never spoken me

45:19

directly. Oh my god. Even when she introduced me the

45:21

first time, he turned to her and said, what does

45:23

he do? Oh, jeez. So,

45:24

yeah, there is a cure. Yeah. For

45:27

sure. So he went in the house and I gave her to add the usual

45:29

high Merry Christmas and he gave me the

45:31

usual disinterested glance. One more example. Last

45:34

year, I made the mistake of bringing a bottle

45:36

of wine. It was a twenty five

45:38

dollar bottle, which was pricey for fame, and I even

45:40

had the wine store lady help me pick it out.

45:42

Oh. Girl friend's mom told me to put it in

45:44

the kitchen, they didn't open it while we were and

45:46

she later admitted to the girlfriend they'd regifted it to the housekeeper because

45:48

it was quote gas station hooch.

45:51

Wow. Why would this girlfriend

45:53

repeat this to her boyfriend?

45:54

I don't know why letting him know how

45:57

shitty her parents are laughing to. Maybe she's

45:59

kinda race rich and she doesn't have those

46:01

social keys. She doesn't know, like -- Yeah.

46:03

-- to not tell him that

46:05

they gave a wine to the housekeeper. But to

46:07

add the fucking gas station hooch --

46:09

Yeah. -- that's just like Why?

46:11

Maybe she's also I mean, do you think she's

46:13

a little self aware? Like, her parents were

46:15

assholes, she a bitch. She, like, gave the

46:17

gift away. Possibly. Maybe. We

46:20

imagine he likes her. He

46:22

likes her. We

46:24

managed

46:24

to get through the day yesterday without much drama except the car thing, which

46:26

I'd normally consider a win, but today

46:28

I keep thinking about the whole situation with

46:31

our wondering if I'm really willing to deal with these people for the

46:33

rest of my life. Girlfriend, I have

46:35

tossed around the possibility of getting married more

46:37

than once, but I know they'll

46:39

never accept me. If we get married,

46:41

I'll have to see them a lot more than once a year. Girls have given up on trying

46:44

to defend me to her parents and just ignore

46:46

her bullshit most of the time, but I can tell it

46:48

bothers her

46:50

too. They bankroll a big chunk of her lifestyle, and I think she's worried

46:52

they'll cut her off if she pushes down. so I

46:54

don't know if this is gonna work.

46:57

not feeling

46:57

like an asshole, but am I wasting my time? Is

47:00

this relationship doomed? I think she's a

47:02

girlfriend always tells me she doesn't care

47:04

how to me things, but She

47:06

does it. She's gonna escalate. It's gonna escalate. I like the top

47:08

comment. The problem isn't that they're rich. It's

47:10

that they're fucking assholes. Yeah. Yeah.

47:14

Yeah. Yeah. I well, that's like a caricature of

47:16

rich people. I don't know. The last person I

47:18

did was a lawyer and he came from a

47:20

very rich Taiwanese family. Mhmm.

47:24

And Sometimes I thought about that too because my dad and my,

47:26

like, my family were not that at

47:28

fame. You know? Like, his parents

47:30

were a type that's, like, when he went

47:33

off to college in another state. They came

47:35

and they would apartment shop with him and be like,

47:38

no. The car's not nice enough here. This

47:40

is

47:40

Ghetto.

47:42

or,

47:42

like, they're also, like, so fucking they were shitty. Like -- Yes. --

47:44

a black person walks by the car. They locked their doors

47:47

immediately, kind of people. Yeah. And

47:50

the thought did cross my mind. I'm like, I wonder if this will ever work

47:52

out in the long run because of our families. And

47:55

then it really reached

47:58

the point where, well, he always assured, like, no, no, it wouldn't matter at all. I

48:00

don't care what my parents think blah, blah, blah.

48:02

But one time we had an argument

48:06

about, like, what we were taught when

48:08

we were kids. And he said, well, I think I trust my parents with their higher

48:10

education than I would trust yours. Oh,

48:13

gee. It's definitely engrained

48:15

in -- Yeah. -- like, and I said Where you came from is

48:18

ingrained in you. Mhmm. Yeah. because you're bad.

48:20

And I said, okay. I don't

48:22

care because my

48:23

dad can probably fuck up both your parents. Yeah. Like, my dad

48:25

will be if you're shitting him. You don't

48:27

beat him your dad. But yeah. When

48:29

it

48:29

comes to, like, differences

48:31

like this. It's kinda hard to

48:33

fucking Yeah. I don't

48:35

I always suck. I mean, honestly,

48:38

like, I

48:40

get that there's a class issue

48:42

sometimes, like, maybe

48:43

but but,

48:46

like, most wealthy people

48:48

that I know that aren't

48:50

insecure. Like, they understand that, like, oh,

48:52

well, if we have to if we're

48:54

so wealthy that we're to events and you're, like,

48:56

unculture or whatever, like, we'll just put you in

48:58

classes. Like, we'll get you fucking etiquette classes. Like, we'll

49:00

just fix you. You know what I mean? Like, just they

49:02

kinda know that it's bullshit too. Yeah.

49:04

But they're, like, they're just a part of that

49:06

society. So but

49:07

they wouldn't be, like,

49:08

oh, you just have no worth as a person. Yeah. Get

49:10

your Honda out of here. Not even like you're

49:12

looking at hell. That's ridiculous. But not

49:15

every rich person is like that. I

49:17

guess that's ridiculous. Deeply deep

49:20

ingrained in security. Yeah. I'm not gonna

49:22

get fixed. I feel like they're miserable miserable

49:24

themselves because they're constantly

49:26

doing the whole, like, keeping up with the Jones kind of

49:28

thing. And they're -- That's too far.

49:30

-- that's too far. Yeah. They're like, what would neighbors Like, holy I

49:32

don't know if you were making sure your fucking mades are

49:34

here

49:34

cleaning your house. Yeah.

49:36

Yeah. Like, look, guys. You

49:38

go down Beverly Hills Drive. It's just like shitty old

49:40

cars all the way. I'm like, damn these look like the

49:42

mates cars, you know, some mates and gardeners, whatever

49:44

the fuck it is. like, who fucking cares? That there's a honda

49:47

in front of your house? Yeah. Like, no one cares.

49:49

But to the point where, like, oh, this one is two,

49:51

I wouldn't even put it in beside

49:53

fame, dude, just like this hospital. ridiculous.

49:55

Nobody likes you. People just tolerate you. That's

49:57

all. I feel like that he's just he's

49:59

just

50:00

just walk away. because, I

50:02

mean, clearly, the the girlfriend does care what

50:04

her parents are saying. She's not

50:07

even allowing him to drive

50:09

out the fucking actually, yeah, to drive

50:11

the fucking car. Yeah. Yeah.

50:13

She's not she's not

50:15

adorning him with what she has.

50:17

she's still allowing him to be the other. Mhmm. You know

50:19

what I mean? Like, if I had all this shit, I didn't

50:21

even fuck everybody. Just grab my fucking car. We'll, like,

50:23

we'll switch at the gas station before we

50:25

get to my parents' house just so they shut up. Yeah. Like, my shit's your shit. stop here.

50:27

Like, my shit's your shit. It doesn't matter. They're they're

50:30

stupid, but I don't

50:32

believe that Like, if she was

50:34

supporting him more and adorning him more with, like,

50:36

what she has and not making a big deal, I don't think

50:38

he would feel so other either. because he's just like, whoa.

50:40

What is What's

50:41

going on here? Mhmm. Mhmm. So there

50:43

is an update. He said,

50:45

okay. So this post blew up

50:48

and my girlfriend actually

50:50

saw it. Yeah. And then he got a text from her saying

50:52

in all caps, we need to talk.

50:54

Mhmm. Obviously, you do.

50:56

She

50:56

said she was feeling hurt and angry

50:57

when she sent

51:00

that text. but she said she had time to read through the comments and think about things

51:02

and she wasn't upset, which came to

51:04

my apartment later. She still said that

51:06

or she said that still I had no right to

51:08

tell the whole Internet Internet about

51:11

our relationship problems. And I Really, I know who you fame. I know who

51:13

you are. are. Yeah. The parents are like, oh

51:15

my god. What is the Internet think

51:17

of don't even know who they are

51:20

exactly. That's how she's really awesome.

51:22

That's how she sounds. Yeah. Take

51:24

her parents. We

51:26

talked for a long time Thursday. She says she knows

51:28

her parents treat people like shit and that they control

51:30

her and her siblings with money. It's partially

51:32

a cultural thing according to her.

51:34

Girlfriend's born and raised in the US and her parents grew up in a rich in a different country and

51:36

moved here a long time ago. She said they

51:38

had a hard time assimilating with upper class Americans

51:40

and flop very hard because they're There

51:43

it is. insecure. There it is.

51:46

Girlfriend also implied that kind of

51:48

behavior was a lot more acceptable in their home country in

51:50

the nineteen eighties and they never achieved English's

51:52

home country. Mexico.

51:55

Oh. So to

51:57

her Mexico. In Mexico,

51:59

it very

51:59

is -- Yes. --

52:02

judgmental. Yeah. super about -- Yeah. -- who's got money? Who

52:04

doesn't? Like, we're up here. You're down there.

52:06

Good. There's a product of that

52:08

environment though being, like,

52:10

doggy dog. Yeah.

52:12

It's an it's unstable. On top of that

52:14

girlfriend's mom was slash is

52:16

emotionally and physically abusive. She said

52:18

her mom used slapper for talking

52:20

back and once cut up all the girlfriend's clothes and

52:22

betting after an argument after going out

52:24

with some high school friends. girlfriend said she's

52:26

still afraid of her mom and has a hard time standing up

52:28

to her. she also has very little affection from her parents growing up.

52:30

That's a cycle that's a cycle of abuse.

52:32

Yeah. Yeah. So her being cut off from her

52:34

family financially is a scene that's being cut

52:36

off emotionally. All

52:38

that being said I don't know

52:39

my bad. Yeah. She's like, I don't wanna let go this money. I don't

52:41

get I don't get anything else. Don't want me to tell

52:43

me to get

52:44

rid of this money.

52:46

All that being said, we've she

52:48

said that she was

52:50

very apologetic, and she

52:52

doesn't expect me to visit her parents again.

52:55

She's really hurt that I said, I thought I was wasting my time

52:57

in the earlier post, and I said, I was sorry. Okay.

53:00

Cool. Cool. We've been

53:02

talking about moving in together for a while now, and she

53:04

actually suggested she out of her

53:06

townhouse at her family pays for and into an

53:08

apartment. I'm totally fine with this. We're not

53:10

combining our finances or putting her name on the

53:12

lease. The plan for now is split the cost of rent

53:14

blah blah blah. They're gonna move in together.

53:16

girlfriend has a job in her own income. She is the

53:18

co owner of her business that makes a

53:20

decent living. And whoever Yeah. I feel like unless

53:22

she, like, basically, is able to

53:24

reach a common grum with their parents, like, look, I

53:26

get you don't like him

53:28

and, like, you're concerned

53:30

that he's poor or whatever,

53:32

but

53:32

I would like to have you in my life.

53:34

I'm gonna stay with him. Like, you know,

53:36

like she's gotta she's gotta say something to kinda stop

53:38

the bleeding or get

53:40

cut off or let go of him

53:43

because this is not gonna go way.

53:45

Yeah. She's not you can't she can't compartmentalize her life

53:47

like this. Yeah. Right? Like,

53:50

this

53:50

is they're they're freaking out because they realize

53:52

that it's not gonna out so they're trying to, like,

53:54

scramble to make this work, but I just

53:56

don't see it working. Yeah.

53:57

Well, it seems like here things are moving for

53:59

the better because she is seriously

54:02

contemplating, like, I

54:02

have my own life. Being cut off? Being cut off. Okay. Yeah. Well, for

54:04

how long, we'll see she's gonna start resenting him

54:06

because she got cut off for him. I'm gonna be sending

54:08

it to him. Like, I left the fucking I

54:11

agree with that. Right. Oh, you better not with the first

54:14

head. Oh, shit. Talk comments says,

54:16

honestly, you were seeing the post in comments and

54:18

realizing it was about her was probably the best thing that can

54:20

happen to your relationship. sounds like been

54:22

a real eye opener and like she's serious about

54:24

making the change. It's always gonna be

54:26

a battle with those parents, but should also

54:29

make your really ship stronger. Good luck. I hope so.

54:31

Yeah. I mean, odds are not

54:33

in your fame. I

54:36

she I will

54:36

give her the benefit now. Mhmm. But

54:38

I don't know, ma'am. because

54:40

I can't see you. holding it over him.

54:42

Like, I could've lived a better life human nature.

54:44

But it is everything for you.

54:46

Soon as some shit gets rough, Oh,

54:48

boy. Yeah. That that's rough. That's

54:50

nice. No. No, man. Well, I

54:53

mean, it's it's a

54:54

good thing she, like,

54:56

self reflected though. Yeah. There's some growth there. She knows.

54:58

She knows. Alright. Next

55:00

one says, I am a twenty

55:04

six male. And I upset a woman, and my friends are asking, like,

55:06

I'm in the wrong. Okay? Well,

55:08

your friends already don't aren't on your side.

55:09

Is that Mood side?

55:12

he's twenty six, this woman that

55:13

he upset is in her twenties.

55:16

I went out clubbing last night with my

55:18

friends. There were seven of us, three guys including

55:20

me Mood four

55:22

girls. My girlfriend, Hannah, was meant to come but she was feeling ill.

55:24

I offered to stay I wanna assume that this

55:26

bitch tried to hit on him or something. I don't know.

55:30

I offered to stay in with her when she insisted I go out and have a

55:32

good time. At the club, my friends got to talking to

55:34

a group of women who apparently work in finance.

55:37

They were here for some sort of conference and were checking

55:39

out local places in their spare time.

55:42

One of them, Lauren started trying to

55:44

chat to me and asked for

55:46

my number, She was pretty,

55:47

but let's see. Mhmm. She was

55:48

pretty, but I was not interested as I have

55:50

a girlfriend. I told her this, but then she started asking

55:52

for pictures of my girlfriend, Hannah. Weird.

55:56

I showed her and she said that I

55:58

quote could do better than

55:59

that. Why are you even interacting

56:02

within this fucking

56:04

conversation. Lauren, are you not

56:06

embarrassed? That is embarrassing.

56:08

Why is he why is he entertaining

56:11

this bullshit? Also, there is a possibility that he might be,

56:13

like, exaggerating to make himself sound

56:16

better. Maybe? Maybe. Just maybe.

56:17

I was

56:18

annoyed and told her to leave me alone.

56:21

Later in me, my friends were dancing and Lauren and her group came

56:23

up to us and she started trying to dance with me.

56:25

I gave her the brush off once again and

56:27

I moved away from her and she gave

56:29

me a dirty look. a while later she came back, how dare

56:31

you not want me? Right? Yeah. This girl definitely exists. I

56:33

believe it is.

56:34

Oh, yeah. I believe she exists

56:37

for sure. Yeah. Yes. I'm not saying she doesn't. Yeah.

56:39

A while later, she came back. And by that point, she

56:42

was really drunk. She smoked at me and

56:44

threw her drink in

56:46

my fame. Oh, damn. I was absolutely fuming at a

56:48

response. I poured my beer on her head.

56:50

She started crying and ran to the bouncer

56:52

who got us all

56:54

kicked out. Oh, wow. Everyone then proceeded to have a go at me. I

56:56

understand they were annoyed that we were kicked out, but everyone was

56:58

acting like I was wrong to pour my drink on

57:00

her. They all saw her splasher drink in my

57:02

face, but everyone was was

57:04

nasty to do that to a girl. The

57:06

ladies in our group were talking about how

57:08

upset they'd become if someone ruined their dress

57:10

hair and make up by doing that. But

57:13

when she started -- Yeah. -- did

57:15

that to him. But when I

57:18

pointed out that she did the same thing to

57:20

me, everyone said that it wasn't

57:22

the same. Nobody

57:22

said goodbye to me last night, and I made my own way home. I told

57:24

Hannah what happened and she agrees I didn't do anything

57:26

wrong. No. I tried explaining myself over

57:29

the group chat, but everyone ignored me. How

57:31

do I sort this out in your way? Yeah. I don't know. Fuck your

57:32

friends. Yeah. Fuck your friends. I

57:35

started on your friend's side, but I'm

57:37

like, what if

57:37

she literally

57:40

doused you in a drink -- Yeah. -- and then you did the exact same thing

57:42

-- Yeah. -- unless he did it in, like, a

57:44

meaner way and he's not including it. Like,

57:48

if he like, kinda hit her with it or, like, you know,

57:50

kinda, like, was more disgusting with it.

57:52

Mhmm. I can see, like, him, like, taking it

57:54

up on lunch and being, like,

57:56

more disgusting. and abusive in the way

57:58

he would retaliate. But if it was

57:59

just like a splash and a splash,

58:02

it's like, well, bitch start don't start no

58:04

shit. There won't

58:04

be no shit. Yeah. You know, why was she

58:06

obsessed with him all night and, like, not leaving him alone? Take no

58:09

for an answer, but she's a girl. That

58:11

is Yeah. This is weird. Weird. So

58:13

don't expect to hit

58:15

someone and not get hit back. Mhmm. I wonder if

58:17

his friends noticed that she

58:19

was just, like, on him and that

58:21

he was rejecting her

58:24

creepy because if they

58:24

didn't notice that either, then it might just look like

58:26

a

58:26

blow up. Yeah. Exactly. Like, what what the fuck

58:29

happened to you? Well, even though even if

58:31

they didn't notice, like, the all

58:33

her, like, hitting on him the whole night, they he'd

58:35

said that they did see that she threw a drink in

58:37

his face. Right. So be

58:39

because at that point, it could

58:41

still be deserved from him.

58:44

Oh, in fact, he didn't

58:46

He retaliated. Yeah. Exactly. Yes. So I mean,

58:48

but he, you know, explained he's trying to explain this.

58:50

And all the girls and everyone's all mad at him. So

58:52

I must I feel like he must

58:55

have retaliated, like, you know, like,

58:57

if someone does this and then you fucking

58:59

know, Bam. Yeah. Like, it's

59:01

like, whoa, dude. Your retaliation especially

59:03

to a chick was a lot.

59:05

Right. But if it was tit for

59:07

tat evenly small, I don't get it.

59:09

Mhmm. Why are his friends being weird? Yeah.

59:12

Like, I would be like, bro, maybe don't try to

59:14

retaliate on a girl, but I get it. Like, she

59:16

did hit you with the

59:18

drinks. Yeah. Top

59:18

comment is get new friends.

59:20

Mhmm. Your friends are stupid. They

59:22

were only saying that to justify their anger

59:24

towards you since you were quote, the reason

59:26

their night of fun ended. If you wanna handle this materially, show them this Reddit

59:29

post so you can so they can see what

59:31

the situation looks like from a

59:33

third person's perspective. then maybe if

59:35

they're not complete idiots, still change their stance. Mhmm. Also invite all over for a

59:37

barbecue and have a bunch of beers lined up to pour

59:40

on them. No.

59:43

Yeah. That's a good point that they bring up though

59:45

because they did end up getting kicked out

59:47

because of him -- Mhmm. -- because a

59:49

girl snipped. Mhmm. So I could see and then they're all they've

59:51

all been drinking. Yeah. So they're just not thinking

59:54

very rationally. Oh, god.

59:56

Hearing about desperate people like that

59:58

can't say I can't say no

59:59

makes me like, ugh. It's weird Mood, like,

1:00:02

if she was pretty because he said she was pretty.

1:00:04

So she's already, like, pretty. That's why she could

1:00:06

probably get in yes. She's

1:00:08

probably, like, what? I've never been rejected before now. How do

1:00:09

I act? You know? Like like a

1:00:12

psycho. Let me want

1:00:13

you more. Mhmm.

1:00:15

Creepy. Next

1:00:18

one. I don't wanna take part wedding

1:00:20

night. Sex

1:00:21

ritual. Wait. A girlfriend?

1:00:23

Yeah. Nothing on

1:00:26

school. but I still wanna marry her. I don't know. Okay. Same thing.

1:00:28

Fame. Weird. So

1:00:30

I'm twenty three. Getting married to

1:00:32

my girlfriend who's also twenty three. Oh,

1:00:35

yeah. Yeah. We're getting married early next year if

1:00:38

all goes to plan. I don't have a lot of

1:00:40

family. She, however, has a huge

1:00:42

extended family. For the most part, we get

1:00:44

on great. for the

1:00:45

most part with her extended family? I don't know.

1:00:46

They Oh, yeah. Yeah. With the family, I think.

1:00:48

They tend to be very loud and have huge personalities, which

1:00:50

is sometimes hard for me to deal

1:00:54

with since I've always been on the quiet side, but overall, very warm

1:00:56

and caring people. Something weird I've noticed

1:00:58

since we got engaged is that my girlfriend's cousins

1:01:00

sometimes make jokes about our

1:01:04

wedding It's weird for them to joke about it since I'm pretty sure our families are

1:01:06

where we've slept together before since we shared a bed at

1:01:08

holiday gatherings and vacations. A

1:01:10

few night ago, we were discussing

1:01:12

wedding plans and thinking about places to go on

1:01:14

our honeymoon. My girlfriend and I were

1:01:16

brainstorming ideas when she tells me that we

1:01:18

won't need a bridal suite, get a

1:01:20

bridal suite right away. Obviously, I asked

1:01:22

why we're getting married at a pretty nice hotel and she

1:01:24

says that she'd like for us to stay at her parents'

1:01:26

house. I don't really mind this. We're

1:01:28

trying to save money for our house

1:01:30

deposit anyways. But girlfriend seems like she has more to say so I push her on why she

1:01:32

wants to stay in her parent's house. She

1:01:34

tells me that there's a really old tradition in her

1:01:36

family on a wedding night. On the

1:01:38

wedding night, the tradition

1:01:40

is the husband and

1:01:40

the wife go into the master bedroom together

1:01:42

and they are supposed to consummate the

1:01:45

marriage. In the family home,

1:01:47

the rest of the family are waiting outside the

1:01:49

so I'm gonna stop them. Good

1:01:51

girl. And then some old school shit.

1:01:53

And then cheer when they come out. Okay.

1:01:56

What religion is this? This is some old school

1:01:58

shit. That's Yeah. I've seen or

1:02:00

heard something like this somehow -- Yeah. --

1:02:02

TV? It's like in a movie or something. This is

1:02:04

like some really old Mood stuff.

1:02:06

Then a piece of the bedsheet is

1:02:08

cut off and sewn into a big tapestry in

1:02:10

my girlfriend's mother owns. Yeah. That

1:02:13

is fucking creepy. I think

1:02:15

my friends saw that I wasn't happy because she quickly told me that

1:02:17

we wouldn't have to actually consummate the marriage if

1:02:19

I felt uncomfortable and wish just

1:02:21

pretend. I don't want anything to do with this.

1:02:23

I absolutely freaked out and told her under no circumstances while I'd be doing that kind of thing

1:02:25

in front of our whole family. Does he not know what

1:02:27

religion they are? Or, like, he didn't know anything about

1:02:30

her culture?

1:02:32

Oh, yeah. And they're getting married. Yeah. That's cool. Looks like she kept this from him

1:02:34

because she was hesitant to tell him. That's

1:02:36

-- You can't --

1:02:37

you're fucking that's weird. That's

1:02:38

weird. Bring that in at the last minute.

1:02:41

Right? Also, it's Tapestry. Also, it's weird

1:02:44

that he's not down to just pretend. Like,

1:02:46

okay. Till. Yeah. to pretend

1:02:48

that. Yeah. when I came back from

1:02:50

talking taking a walk to clear my head, she

1:02:52

was not noticeably acting down and still

1:02:54

is. I think she still she's been texting her

1:02:56

family about this because I received a text from her mother

1:02:58

telling me that I quote, don't

1:03:00

understand the importance of family and

1:03:02

tradition yet, and this kind of tradition

1:03:04

has been around longer than I've been

1:03:06

alive. Mhmm. I don't know how

1:03:08

men's go on from here. I really love my

1:03:10

girlfriend, but I've I've I

1:03:12

I'm freaked out of course, but she's in my

1:03:14

whole world. don't know how to handle this and navigate

1:03:16

this tradition. He's probably just wondering, like,

1:03:18

what else don't I know about her

1:03:21

culture and what else is

1:03:23

gonna happen later, like, once we're actually married, which

1:03:25

is even harder to get out of. It's like, do

1:03:27

I need to impregnate you in front of

1:03:29

everyone too? If they see the blood on the

1:03:31

fucking So you're a virgin. Yeah. What he needs

1:03:33

to do first

1:03:34

is get acquainted

1:03:36

with her culture and learn

1:03:38

everything that he's signing up

1:03:40

for. Yeah. Don't get married yet. because

1:03:42

if you don't understand the religion and you're

1:03:44

not down for it, then this is a recipe

1:03:46

for terrible disaster. And she's just

1:03:48

gonna feel, like, rejected left and right from him because he's, like, what

1:03:50

is this weird shit? You know what I mean? Also, it's

1:03:52

her fault. Why the fuck is she not being open

1:03:55

about? Yeah. She's not telling him

1:03:58

what her her religion or her culture is. And so he's, like,

1:04:00

getting blindsided. I can, like so

1:04:02

they have a tapestry. Can you imagine having a

1:04:04

tapestry of, like, all the pieces of

1:04:06

bed she's at everyone in your family

1:04:08

has banged on on their

1:04:10

wedding night. I don't understand it because there's a

1:04:12

lot of weird things and a lot of weird

1:04:14

religions. It's weird. How do you even

1:04:16

introduce, like, Oh, yeah. This is

1:04:18

where you and your mom boned. And one day,

1:04:20

you're gonna be up here too. That's fucking

1:04:24

weird. one day sweetheart, you know. I find

1:04:26

most weirdness to be weird. I think that's why I'm

1:04:28

kind of agnostic because I'm like, I don't understand it,

1:04:30

but it's people can have

1:04:32

their shit,

1:04:34

but Also, when you marry into it, you need to your

1:04:36

due diligence. And, like, she needs to

1:04:38

be totally helpful when explaining

1:04:41

and transparent -- I'm like, what their culture and

1:04:44

their traditions are. Like, do you wanna sign up

1:04:45

for this or not? Yeah. What did

1:04:47

you guys say?

1:04:48

They're too young. They're too young, first of all. I wouldn't pretend

1:04:50

they're super young. I wouldn't pretend no. I would

1:04:53

do my due diligence to figure out what

1:04:55

is this? What's going on? What am I

1:04:57

signing up for? What's next? what's gonna

1:04:59

be coming after that? No. For

1:05:00

sure do that, but personally, for me, I wouldn't mind just

1:05:02

going along with it if I

1:05:05

was him or fame this

1:05:07

isn't a big deal. Sure. Like, this is weird, creepy.

1:05:09

I wanna know what the fuck is next.

1:05:11

Mhmm. But sure. I'll pretend I'm

1:05:14

bucking you in your parents

1:05:16

bedroom. Mhmm. Someone says, maybe you need to ask if there's any more

1:05:18

traditional rituals that you've had to do before

1:05:20

agreeing to marry her. Do they have

1:05:22

a religion? he hasn't responded. He

1:05:24

hasn't even posted an update

1:05:26

motherfucker. That's so weird. Just imagine he's,

1:05:28

like, accidentally falling into

1:05:30

some, like, mid summer. Right.

1:05:32

Like, it's some crazy, salty

1:05:34

thing. III don't know what

1:05:36

religion that is. I feel like I've heard that

1:05:38

before. He could just be trolling. I don't know. Is this a real pose? Mhmm.

1:05:40

That just seems so old world to me

1:05:42

that I'm like, who's practicing that?

1:05:44

still. You know what

1:05:46

I mean? Like, I don't know. But maybe

1:05:48

there's some

1:05:49

Telkom and says, tell them

1:05:51

you'll do it in return for a dowry

1:05:53

of a hundred head of candle called white stadium and a

1:05:55

track of arable land. It's

1:05:58

terrible.

1:05:58

for you to let me work

1:06:00

that up. Like, that can be passed on.

1:06:02

Right? Like, you know, errors? ARA0

1:06:06

no. No. I don't know.

1:06:08

Arable means used for or it's suitable for growing crops.

1:06:10

Okay. That's

1:06:12

a pretty clear response. It is when

1:06:14

you come on. Yeah. think

1:06:17

I can never even I feel like No. I mean, they're kids.

1:06:20

First of all, second like, I mean, as an

1:06:22

adult now, like, if I dated someone and they're like, oh,

1:06:24

I'm such a such religion, I would be

1:06:26

like, okay. Cool.

1:06:27

How deep are you into it? How much do you follow that tradition? Are you

1:06:29

okay with the

1:06:29

fact that I'm agnostic? And I'm probably

1:06:31

not going to

1:06:34

do the things you're doing, but I'm supportive of you doing them. But,

1:06:36

like, don't expect me to do them. Yeah. Is

1:06:38

this okay? Yeah. Mhmm. If it's not okay, then

1:06:40

that's why a lot of people stay in

1:06:43

there culture or stay in religion because some of those things are

1:06:45

so important -- Mhmm. -- that

1:06:48

not what do they call it being yoked the same

1:06:50

or whatever? Like, if you're not

1:06:50

on the same page, like, that that

1:06:53

is a recipe for a divorce. Yeah.

1:06:55

Yeah. I wouldn't be able to I can't

1:06:57

even have sex when I know my friends are in the next

1:06:59

room. Yeah. because I have roommates home

1:07:01

sometimes. Like, I have to stay so funny. I like some of our

1:07:03

friends, you know. Just share

1:07:06

the house. Yeah. And even though we're like,

1:07:09

one wall away. Yeah. I don't even know how guys can like,

1:07:11

if I was a guy, how would ever even perform knowing

1:07:13

her whole family fame inside the

1:07:16

door. Yeah. creep

1:07:18

it, like, your dad and your mom's, like, pushing their ear against the door, like, Yay.

1:07:22

Weird. Yay. Everyone has

1:07:24

their weird relate like,

1:07:26

honestly, even

1:07:28

some Christian things now still I find to be

1:07:30

weird. Like drinking the blood of Christ or

1:07:32

whatever. I'm just like, what? Like, we've been

1:07:34

conditioned into the things that

1:07:36

we're familiar with with, like, the Christian stuff and, like, the stuff that we're

1:07:38

like, there's probably countless traditions and

1:07:40

or I'm, like, all of this shit's weird.

1:07:42

Yeah. Like, why are we doing

1:07:45

any of it. That's I don't know. It's

1:07:47

cannibalistic.

1:07:47

Yeah. Oh, oh, it's just a weird

1:07:50

one. So yeah. But it's

1:07:51

like, if you like that, that's fine.

1:07:54

Do you But you

1:07:55

need to figure out if you can be in that marriage. Mhmm. Alright. That's the end of

1:07:57

our episode. Thanks for watching. Yeah. Leave

1:07:59

your

1:07:59

opinions below

1:08:02

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Stromma. It's Latin delicious. But

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