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[Birth Stories] Can You Wait to Push Until the Doctor Arrives?

[Birth Stories] Can You Wait to Push Until the Doctor Arrives?

Released Saturday, 17th February 2024
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[Birth Stories] Can You Wait to Push Until the Doctor Arrives?

[Birth Stories] Can You Wait to Push Until the Doctor Arrives?

[Birth Stories] Can You Wait to Push Until the Doctor Arrives?

[Birth Stories] Can You Wait to Push Until the Doctor Arrives?

Saturday, 17th February 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
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<!DOCTYPE html><html lang="en"><head><script nonce="RTjFYwtidV6w0169sZJ2XA">var DOCS_timing={}; DOCS_timing['pls']=new Date().getTime();</script><meta property="og:title" content="240217_Alyssa Jennings birth story_transcript"><meta property="og:type" content="article"><meta property="og:site_name" content="Google Docs"><meta property="og:url" content="https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zC13v436d7t2bLfpWDA8mV4_iEJJBiBTKJotdY9z7Rs/edit?usp=sharing&amp;usp=embed_facebook"><meta property="og:image" content="https://lh7-us.googleusercontent.com/docs/AHkbwyK9LzQk9C7pwMD_sBbbpgLD2Hl2kEnJ-6H1uo0crTAoBsdrFK0pc-xEWM00jO4UtIZikpI6TeCRFuLXNb-vw2C1KS8kdmw1KqYuhtC7i_8QzUQyKBU=w1200-h630-p"><meta property="og:image:width" content="1200"><meta property="og:image:height" content="630"><meta property="og:description" content="[Birth Stories] Can You Wait to Push Until the Doctor Arrives? After a difficult first labor with interventions she was unsure about, Alyssa Jennings was determined that her next birth would be on her terms. Little did she know that she’d be having to contain the fetal ejection reflex until her d..."><meta name="google" content="notranslate"><meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, user-scalable=no, initial-scale=1.0, minimum-scale=1.0, maximum-scale=1.0"><meta http-equiv="X-UA-Compatible" content="IE=edge;"><meta name="fragment" content="!"><meta name="referrer" content="origin"><title>240217_Alyssa Jennings birth story_transcript - Google Docs</title><link rel="shortcut icon" href="https://ssl.gstatic.com/docs/documents/images/kix-favicon-2023q4.ico"><link rel="chrome-webstore-item" href="https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/apdfllckaahabafndbhieahigkjlhalf"><script nonce="RTjFYwtidV6w0169sZJ2XA">_docs_webfonts_fontFaces = null; _docs_webfonts_iframe_fontFaces = null;DOCS_timing['wpid']=new Date().getTime();</script><style nonce="PxAN3rTBTiKINm97aUjrqQ">.gb_ib:not(.gb_kd){font:13px/27px Roboto,Arial,sans-serif;z-index:986}@-webkit-keyframes 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Little did she know that she’d be having to contain the fetal ejection reflex until her doctor arrived! Alyssa shares with Adriana the magic words her husband used to help her wait (no, they didn’t have anything to do with the doctor), along with a great solution to when you don’t want to labor in the hospital but you want to be close by (even though you live half an hour away). \n-\nAdriana Lozada: Welcome to Birthful, Mighty Parent or Parent-To-Be! I’m Adriana Lozada and I hope you are ready for two wonderful birth stories today! For that, I will be talking with Alyssa Jennings, who did lots of prenatal yoga and hypnobirthing with her first, and then even more so for her second.\nOne of the things that I found really interesting about her second birth is that even though she was experiencing strong involuntary pushes just before her baby was born, you can see how remarkably powerful the mind-body connection can be because even as she was experiencing this fetal ejection reflex her brain was able to activate some sort control in order to wait a few minutes. \nNow, this is a very unusual situation— because usually, you’re wanting to get baby out as quickly as possible, not waiting— so extra kudos to her husband for knowing exactly what to say to help her activate her thinking brain. \nI also have to mention that during the episode I get on a very teeny tiny soapbox about electronic fetal monitoring, and I didn’t want to go too in-depth about that while talking with Alyssa, so if you want to know more about the evidence, I’ve added a couple of links on the show notes including one to the short episode I did specifically on the topic, called “Straight Talk About the Effects of Electronic Fetal Monitoring on You and Your Baby.”\nYou’re listening to Birthful. Here to inform your intuition. \nAdriana: Welcome, Alyssa! It is great having you here on the show today.\nAlyssa Jennings: Thank you so much for having me. I\u0027m so excited to be here!\nAdriana: Yeah, and I am excited to hear your stories. And I know you have two, and they were kind of, like, \"before\" and \"after\" you found the podcast. So that\u0027s always fun, to me, to know that people… like, anyway, have, like, that the podcast does something, in helping with confidence, and helping you with outcomes. So I\u0027m excited to hear about that!\nAlyssa: Absolutely!\nAdriana: Let\u0027s take you back to when you were pregnant with your first: At that point, what did you know about birth? What were your expectations or wishes? How did you prepare, if anything?\nAlyssa: Sure. I did not know much at all. 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But that took three attempts, and was really a pain and ended up being a pain the next time around too.\nAdriana: And that\u0027s something… I think it\u0027s one of those things that we don\u0027t ever talk about, but it\u0027s actually not so uncommon, because when you\u0027re pregnant, you\u0027re… we know that, y\u0027know, blood volume changes and blood pressure changes, not the, I mean, not your actual blood pressure number, but like how much blood you have circulating, which goes up 50% than your usual blood volume.\nAlyssa: Right.\nAdriana: It\u0027s harder to get a needle in a pregnant person\u0027s veins!\nAlyssa: And it\u0027s more… it\u0027s going to… I mean, it obviously wasn\u0027t the painful part of the birth, but it was the most irritating, easily, because they\u0027re just poking and poking and poking, and you\u0027ve got other things going on and, and you\u0027re like, \"Can we just get this part done please?\" And I… It\u0027s not her fault. 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You\u0027re good— don\u0027t need one.\"\nAlyssa: Yeah. It might have been a possibility, part of that, at that point, the lead nurse assumed because I was there for having my water broken, that there would also be Pitocin. And I actually had to point out at one point, \"No, there\u0027s no Pitocin. Check that order.\" And she did, and it wasn\u0027t there, and that was alright… but I think she was kind of moving on with her status quo.\nAdriana: More like \"This is an intervention…\"\nAlyssa: Right?\nAdriana: And we\u0027re just gonna…\nAlyssa: A normal induction, yeah. Yes. So I think that was probably part of it, but it might also be standard procedure at that hospital. I don\u0027t know.\nAdriana: And so somebody finally got the HepLock in, right?\nAlyssa: Mhm, they did. They did eventually, yes. And OB comes in at 7:30 in the morning and broke my water, no problem. Not uncomfortable. I mean, a little weird, but not uncomfortable. And immediately I was over five centimeters and she said, \"Don\u0027t— if you\u0027re in the hallway— don\u0027t tell anyone out there your induction story, because they\u0027ll cry. Don\u0027t share that yet,\" because it was working, she thought, the way she wanted it to… Things were gonna move the way she wanted. So that was encouraging. We went out in the hallway, walked around for a while, bounced on the yoga ball. Things got moving probably within the next 30 minutes, pretty dramatically.\nI kept wanting to get in the tub. The nurse wanted the contractions to be a little stronger and more consistent. Baby needed to be monitored every 40 minutes, for 20 minutes, I think was what they were saying? And they kept saying that I, y\u0027know, \"You can do whatever you want. We work around you,\" but also the baby\u0027s moving and they were trying to hold it. And it just… I felt like I was trying to accommodate that, even though they kept saying I didn\u0027t need to. 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Now, nobody\u0027s in the room. \"What if I have to get out? What if something happens? What if I slip?\" I just… All those crazy stupid things that go through your brain, that have no basis in reality, but when you\u0027re in labor, y\u0027know, things happen. But it was the suddenly being in there by myself— even though I knew he was coming right back or somebody was coming right back, and everything was fine— it just is that weird, I don\u0027t know, weird mental thing. Yeah, it was interesting.\nAdriana: Yeah. By this point, what was going on with contractions and the intensity? What were you feeling?\nAlyssa: Yeah, they were… The tub felt great, but they were decently intense. I think, when I got out of the tub, they checked again, and I think I was like six and a half centimeters. And that was four hours later, so I felt like it was pretty decent progress for a fairly short amount of time.\nAdriana: So then he finally came back?\nAlyssa: Yeah, he came back. Nobody was coming to the hospital. It was a misunderstanding. I\u0027m glad we cleared it up though. But then when he came back, I got out of the tub. I just wanted to— I don\u0027t know, regroup, whatever— and I couldn\u0027t get back out of my own head at that point. And I started… I asked him, I said, \"I think I\u0027m considering epidural at this point,\" like, \"I don\u0027t know if I can handle this. I don\u0027t know what to do differently.\" And the nurse offered Stadol, which I knew nothing about, but I wish I had. That\u0027s the one thing I did not research in advance that I wish I had. She… I think I didn\u0027t clearly communicate that my goal was to avoid the Pitocin and not necessarily the epidural. And she thought she was doing me a favor in offering an alternative that was not an epidural, but in hindsight, I wish I\u0027d gone straight for the epidural because the \"being present\" is so much easier on that. And Stadol is… was not great. So it\u0027s… I don\u0027t know how to describe it. What is it? A narcotic, or what? I mean, it\u0027s a pain medication. It lasted for a couple of hours, but I was in and out on that and slept sort of off and on. \nAdriana: So what we use it… In my neck of the words, it\u0027s Nubain, but it\u0027s a similar purpose of it being something that… it is narcotic, so it does go into your blood system and makes you sleepy.\nAlyssa: Mhm.\nAdriana: And it, like you said, it… you\u0027re not as aware. The idea is it kind of takes the edge of the contraction, but doesn\u0027t eliminate the contraction. And a lot of people are able to sleep, depending on how tired they are, but it can be even… Did you feel like you were able to get some decent rest with it? Or did you feel like every contraction, like it was a non-ending contraction because you just kept waking up only for the contraction and were out for the rest of it?\nAlyssa: I felt very in and out. I don\u0027t know that I got great sleep, but it didn\u0027t feel like one never-ending contraction either. I remember thinking at one point \"I can still feel them and they still hurt— I just don\u0027t care as much,\" which is a weird thing to—\nAdriana: That sounds right!\nAlyssa: —to be thinking about at that point! And when she was, after she… when she first started putting it in, she said, \"You\u0027ll feel a little bit drunk.\" And I was like, \"Oh wait, hold on. What?\" and then that was absolutely accurate. So it wasn\u0027t the greatest experience, but it was pretty short. And I did get a little bit of rest, which I\u0027m glad I had for later. But when that started to wear off, as I said, \"Let\u0027s just do the epidural.\" I don\u0027t think coming off of it was the hardest thing because you\u0027re coming right back into these contractions that now are further on than what they were when you started it and that was a hard transition, to jump into (no pun intended), because in hindsight, I probably was in transition, but it was a pretty severe jump back in. So I did do the epidural. That was about three o\u0027clock. 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Yeah, they were wonderful. I had actually brought… Because last time, the tape kept coming off when my arm got wet, for the HepLock, and it just was so irritating. So I had ordered a waterproof sticker cover thing, like for PICC lines, for people who have more permanent IV lines (for chemo and things like that). I ordered one and brought it with me, just in case the stuff kept coming off. And my doula thought that was hilarious!\nAdriana: It\u0027s a great idea! I\u0027m gonna go and put one in my birth bag now.\nAlyssa: But when it\u0027s that irritating and when that\u0027s the thing that\u0027s driving you nuts… y\u0027know, little things… I mean, at certain points in labor, little things drive you insane, and so I did not want that to be an issue again.\nAdriana: Mhm!\nAlyssa: Yeah. It was great.\nAdriana: So at this point, like, once they got you into a room, you were in the tub?\nAlyssa: Pretty quickly, yeah, once they got the HepLock in, I kept saying, \"Let me get in the tub. Let me get in the tub! I don\u0027t care if you put it in while I\u0027m in the tub; I\u0027ll put my arm on the edge of the tub. I don\u0027t care! Just get me in the tub.\" And they did, and turned the lights down. \nThe doulas had LED candles. They turned on my affirmations again. It was just so… I don\u0027t even think I saw my L\u0026D nurses. They were kind of poking their heads around, checking in with the doulas, thumbs up. That working relationship was fabulous. They\u0027d all been to that same hospital a million times. They have tons of babies there. So everybody kind of, I think, was familiar with everybody else, which was beautiful. Once we were in the tub, it was great. It was great. So relaxing. I was there for a little under an hour probably, and I hit a point where in my head I felt… I thought, \"This is where last time I said I couldn\u0027t do it. And I know I can do it this time. But I need somebody else to say it too.\" And so I said out loud, \"I don\u0027t know if I can do it…\" when in my head I\u0027m thinking, \"I know I can do it,\" but tell me that, y\u0027know, I can. It\u0027s silly to need that from outside, but… \nAdriana: No, that reassurance is huge!\nAlyssa: It made a big difference. And we had talked about in advance: \"What are the things that you want me to say when it gets really hard?\" \"What are the triggers for you that will make you,\" y\u0027know, \"remind you that you can do this, and you\u0027re strong, and all of those things? You can do hard things.\" And so it was exactly what she needed to say that back to me.\nAnd I was like, \"Yes, that\u0027s what I needed.\" It\u0027s so interesting to look back afterwards and be able to pinpoint where you were in different parts of labor and not be able to see it at the time because you\u0027re in it.\nAdriana: Mhm!\nAlyssa: But it\u0027s so clear later! So I was in the tub for about an hour, probably. And then I was saying, \"I think I\u0027m ready to push. I need to push.\" And they weren\u0027t sure that… Yeah, I was six and a half centimeters, not that long before that. So I think they were afraid that if I got out of the tub, I wouldn\u0027t be able to get back in, or that maybe something would throw me off. And wait until, \"Are you really sure? Are you really sure?\" And finally, I was like, \"No, I\u0027m getting… I need to get out of this tub, unless you want this baby in the water.\" So not the ideal, I don\u0027t think… that\u0027s not the kind of water birth you want! \nSo they… I finally… I get out of the tub and she said, \"Do you wanna try to use the restroom or do you want to sit on the toilet for a couple contractions?\" Nope, straight to the bed. And the back of the bed was angled up a little bit, and I kind of just climbed on it, kind of on my arms and almost all fours, my forearms up on the angle and kind of leaning down on my knees. And the nurses came out and started to pull up the footrests or the stirrups. I guess. And I\u0027m just shaking my head. I can\u0027t talk at that point, but I\u0027m shaking my head. And so my doula says, \"No, she doesn\u0027t want those. She wants to say— I think she wants to stay like this.\" Nobody was really sure what I wanted. I was not speaking, but there\u0027s no way I was moving at that point. 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DOCS_modelChunkLoadStart = new Date().getTime(); _getTimingInstance().incrementTime('mp', DOCS_modelChunkLoadStart - DOCS_modelChunkParseStart); DOCS_warmStartDocumentLoader.loadModelChunk(DOCS_modelChunk); DOCS_modelChunk = undefined;</script><script nonce="RTjFYwtidV6w0169sZJ2XA">DOCS_modelChunkParseStart = new Date().getTime();</script><script nonce="RTjFYwtidV6w0169sZJ2XA">DOCS_modelChunk = [{"ty":"is","ibi":42160,"s":"But my OB hadn\u0027t gotten there yet— they called her when I got out of the tub, but she was in the hospital, but not in the room. So they told me, \"Hold off! If you can hold off, if you can.\" And man, when you are super ready to push, waiting is hard! I didn\u0027t intentionally push, but there were pushes happening. So, that, I did my best, but…\nAdriana: That fetal ejection reflex, right? You can\u0027t but push!\nAlyssa: There was no active anything happening, but he was moving. So finally, when she got in, thankfully I had my head down on the bed and I think my doula said, \"She\u0027s here. You can push!\" And, oh, before, right when they were telling me to wait, it was five minutes \u0027til midnight.\nAnd my husband said, \"If you can make it five more minutes, you get to stay here a whole \u0027nother day!\" And he knew how much I would value a day in quiet with somebody else bringing me food and that did it. That got me that extra five minutes until the doctor could get there. So it pushed me off just long enough. And, y\u0027know, he thanked… Bless him for knowing what was important to me, in that moment.\nAdriana: Well, and that\u0027s it\u0027s that? I love that, because it shows how much he knows you! And how regardless of, like, everybody has their— not their job, but their \"responsibilities\" during labor— and his is just to be the loving person that knows you best of all and help? That is something nobody else could have told you, and made such only he knew that. And what that meant, that \"I love you.\" It\u0027s so great.\nAlyssa: Yeah. And I don\u0027t know that I would\u0027ve… I honestly don\u0027t know that we would\u0027ve made it that extra five minutes for her to get there, because he was born at 12:11 a.m., and so if he hadn\u0027t had gotten me to wait that couple of minutes, it easily could have been before midnight, \nAdriana: You got a baby and your extra day!\nAlyssa: I did get my extra day, and it was maybe three pushes after she got there. I don\u0027t know— it was quick. And I had put it off for probably… I was trying not to push well for probably 20 minutes, but yeah, 12:11 a.m. He was seven pounds, one ounce and it was great. \nAdriana: And did he also go… Did you get to pick him up? Like, because you were sort of on your knees, so did they do… Did you end up getting your baby?\nAlyssa: Good question! There\u0027s… I actually heard in my head at the moment there\u0027s I think it\u0027s a Whapio episode where she says, \"There\u0027s a pause,\" if the mom gives birth, there would be a pause before she picked her baby up. And they asked if I wanted to turn over and hold him, and I said, \"I don\u0027t think I can yet. Just give me a second!\" My quads were so tired, flipping over was hard. But I did. I needed that. I took that breath and I flipped over and it was maybe 30 seconds. And they put him right on me. And delayed cord clamping again. And yeah, it was hard to flip over. Didn\u0027t see that coming!\nAdriana: Mhm, yeah.\nAlyssa: Mhm!\nAdriana: That makes sense. Kind of worn out. But then you did it!\nAlyssa: And then I did it!\nAdriana: How was that post-birth for this one, in terms of, like, the immediate post-birth? Were you aware of delivering the placenta this time? Did you have any tears?\nAlyssa: Mhm, yeah. I was aware this time. It was… It went smooth, but I did know this time. And I had, I think, one stitch on each side is all— it wasn\u0027t wasn\u0027t bad at all. He did latch pretty quickly for as far as breastfeeding goes, but we found out later, he had a tongue tie, and it just felt like he was eating constantly, constantly, constantly.\nAnd I was sore, and he was hungry all the time and he was upset, and I couldn\u0027t figure it out. And so if there\u0027s one thing I would say on that front, is if it doesn\u0027t feel right, even if people tell you that \"his latch looks great\"— that\u0027s the thing that we had the lactation consultant in the hospital come look, \"His latch looks great!\" Nobody\u0027s hungry every 30 minutes/45 minutes… and he\u0027s nursing for 45 minutes. That\u0027s not right either. So we had to work through that and eventually got the tongue tie corrected, I think, five or six days in. And it was a whole different world. But if it doesn\u0027t feel right, it\u0027s not. 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We went to the chiropractor for him, pediatric chiropractor, and she gave me a few little therapy things to do. He had a really strong gag reflex. And so we did a little bit there, but mostly… it was mostly for the gag reflex, not for the clipping. And then we also did some craniosacral therapy for him.\nHe was curving into a C, sort of, and a few treatments with that and the chiropractor and he just was all much more relaxed. Poor little guy was all scrunched up! I don\u0027t know what happened, probably coming out so fast, but he just needed to release a few things and then he was a much happier little peanut.\nAdriana: Yay! So that was the first week or so, then things with breastfeeding, everything fell into place?\nAlyssa: Yeah. He eats like a champ. It is… He has wrist rolls and ankle rolls, and you would never know that eating was a challenge for him. So that was… I was very grateful that we had had friends that had tongue tie or lip tie situations as well. And I was really grateful to have heard those stories, because I don\u0027t think that I would\u0027ve… I would not have known otherwise. And I don\u0027t know that the pediatricians would\u0027ve caught it, if I hadn\u0027t brought it up. I don\u0027t know that I would\u0027ve been confident enough to bring up my concerns. And so they wouldn\u0027t have looked, right?\nAdriana: Right. Yeah, especially since the latch looked good, but you knew that the transfer wasn\u0027t.\nAlyssa: Mhm.\nAdriana: All in all, though, how do you feel about your stories? Do you feel there was stuff to process? Do you feel happy about them? Do you feel it was what you wanted?\nAlyssa: Now I feel happy about both of them. The second one, I could not have written more perfectly. The first one did take me a little bit to get over. And at first I thought it was the epidural, but it wasn\u0027t— it was the Stadol and me not knowing what it was ahead of time. That it took me time to be okay with the fact that I didn\u0027t know it all before it happened. I\u0027d never done it before. And that\u0027s… I\u0027m an information freak and a control freak, and that was really hard for me to process. But that kind of forgiving myself for that? Everything else about it, I\u0027m happy with the way everything went. It was perfect. I had no problems with having an epidural. So yes, now they\u0027re both very happy stories.\nAdriana: Good! Yay, I\u0027m glad. I mean, they sound great— but it\u0027s only the person who lives the story can qualify it in that way.\nAlyssa: Yeah.\nAdriana: So aside from the Stadol, though, is there anything you would do differently, either one? Or in terms of the pregnancy preparation, postpartum, at any point?\nAlyssa: Yeah, I don\u0027t think I would do anything differently from the second one. And I mean, even going in, I had told the doulas whichever way that whatever happens, if I decide I want an epidural, that\u0027s fine. If we end up having a c-section, we have a c-section. As long as it\u0027s my choice and I have information, and if they say \"You need to do this,\" or \"Your baby\u0027s in danger,\" yes, I will choose to do that. But give me the opportunity to say a \"yes\" or \"no.\" And that\u0027s really all that I wanted, no matter what happened. So I\u0027m happy. I\u0027m really happy that I was able to have the second one without any other interventions. But as long as I was given options, I would\u0027ve been happy, whatever happened. That\u0027s the biggest thing. \nI did… I forgot to mention the birth preparation class that I did the second time. So the first time, we did the one online through the hospital, and it\u0027s the little online courses, and \"Here are the stages of labor\" and \"Here are the different…\" y\u0027know, kind of the technical version.\nAnd then the one that the studio had is \"Who cares what stage of labor you\u0027re in? Here\u0027s what to do when she\u0027s, like, digging her nails into your arm and you don\u0027t know how to help her feel better! Here\u0027s how to do hip compressions. Here\u0027s how to support if she feels good in a squat,\" like all of that kind of stuff. That was so good. 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