0:01

Brain leak! Welcome

0:03

back everybody. Hello, welcome back to

0:05

the Brain leak podcast. Today

0:07

in a beautiful set, vintage, old.

0:11

This is my house. This is the place

0:13

I rent every time I come to LA. Why did you choose this? I

0:16

just have a hankering for the 70s. Is she in the frame? Yeah, it

0:18

was me. She is now. Get a

0:20

close up on her, Joss. She's the one. What's

0:22

her name? Imelda, I told you. Imelda. You

0:25

said hi to her when you got here. Now,

0:27

Justin, don't forget to hold the microphone. Speaking of the microphone.

0:30

This is our friend Justin. Dare

0:33

I say our best friend, Justin. We've talked

0:35

about Justin a few times on

0:37

the podcast, I think. Yeah. Because

0:39

you're my boys. Ah, yes! Mine's

0:42

hidden. I can't. You should have worn a t-shirt.

0:44

Get a close up. Ah, yeah.

0:46

Here, Justin. Get in here.

0:48

I was told I can't move. No, no, no, no, no.

0:51

You can for this one. You can move. Oh,

0:53

it's nice. Matchy

0:55

boys. We're

0:57

in a cult together. Wow. When

1:00

we all turn 40, which

1:02

we're going to get there a lot quicker than he does, we have to

1:05

kill the other ones. Were

1:07

you guys both born the same year, or were you 89? I

1:10

was 89. I'm 90. You're 90. Very

1:13

close, though. November to February? Yes. Oh,

1:16

kindred spirits were percolating in the womb.

1:18

What's your sign? Aquarius.

1:21

Thanks, Joss. You're a Sagittarius. Scorpio.

1:24

On the cusp. Where's Scorpio? Do I have to do

1:26

a lot of moving? Yeah. We love touching

1:28

each other. This is why I put a

1:30

buffer between you two, because the whole time he'd be like, how's

1:40

Justin doing? What do you have planned for

1:42

today? Hello. Do you guys play games? No. We

1:45

don't have anything. We don't have economic climates. We

1:47

don't have anything planned, ever. The

1:49

most planned thing is

1:51

being here. Did I take my socks off?

1:54

No. You can take your pants off if you want.

1:56

No. Well, actually, I can't say

1:58

you can't take your socks off after we did

2:00

the talk. episode yeah but you got to save

2:02

them you just licked Sean's foot like 48 hours

2:04

ago yeah that's a good

2:06

segue thank you Justin

2:08

for people who don't know you might have seen

2:11

him in the how did we get here documentary

2:13

he was merch Lord for

2:15

a while did a lot of

2:17

stuff with other friends before you

2:19

worked on that tour but you

2:21

also were the producer organizer creator

2:23

founder not founder I invented

2:25

thank miss yeah I had vented giving

2:27

thank you was on stage the way

2:30

it went down was because of Justin

2:32

so that's why he's here he

2:34

told us that we needed to bring him on to

2:37

pay a lot of things that I want to get off my

2:39

chest and from recent documentary

2:41

you're in my documentary that's true I

2:44

have to do this and you did

2:46

the whole show would you say we're actually friends

2:48

or you just like the brilliant work

2:50

that I do on stage

2:52

well everything's transactional isn't it you

2:55

end of the day you've all been

2:57

around we made up a podcast

2:59

just so we could hang out more yeah because

3:02

we couldn't do it otherwise yeah exactly yeah

3:06

no we love you very much we do I

3:08

love you guys too I'd argue that both of

3:10

you are my best friends

3:15

really why did he do that cuz he's it's

3:17

impossible for him to be vulnerable hey we talked about

3:19

the thank-you miss gargoyle

3:23

time to soften that shell oh

3:25

the thing well I didn't hear about the thing miss

3:27

gargoyle because I was sad stage and I couldn't hear

3:29

just heard so I

3:36

just put that bombshell out I

3:39

think that you use as lit boys did you is this

3:41

yours yeah but

3:45

forward Ethan what's your greatest fear oh

3:47

would you say I thought that this is

3:50

exactly the same sweater that I have no

3:52

no come on I

3:54

think this is going really well so far how do

3:56

you feel good I had therapy

3:58

this morning hmm I just talked People

4:00

pleasing tendencies Why

4:03

you showed up 45 minutes late He's

4:09

like, you know what I need to set a boundary everybody

4:11

shows up late for me I am enough Everybody

4:15

gets told that a therapy you are enough.

4:18

Do I show up late for you? No,

4:21

you show up for me though. Hmm Do

4:24

you show up late for him? I show

4:26

up early for everything. I'm like 10 minutes early because I'd

4:28

rather be Uncomfortable 10 minutes early

4:30

on my own rather than make anybody else wait

4:32

for me Yes, I

4:35

hate it. I I'm the person

4:37

that goes like three hours before flight. I'm like

4:39

20 minutes before the movie starts And

4:42

then you sit through like 30 minutes ads anyway, so I'm just

4:44

a fucking idiot wasting my own time I

4:46

would like to go back to a couple of minutes

4:48

ago and say that you guys are also my best

4:50

friends Because I didn't say anything

4:53

we've gone past that but I just wanted to make

4:55

sure that he did ask you a question though What

4:57

is I did it's? Gone

4:59

now. How does camera? Oh, what's my greatest

5:01

fear is what you ask? No, so you

5:03

were listening. Oh It's just

5:06

deflecting. What is my greatest

5:08

fear? Of

5:11

so many shoes from yeah, there's a lot of them

5:13

I think I think are

5:16

we talking about Because there's

5:18

two greatest fears. I think like one of

5:20

them is like heights and stuff or fear

5:23

of failing Yeah, cuz it's like my one

5:25

of my biggest fears. I think would be

5:28

being on my deathbed and looking back and

5:30

regretting Mmm things or

5:32

being like I didn't do enough or anything

5:34

like that. You will absolutely do that, but

5:36

also Bears Would

5:41

you be afraid if you saw like a black bear No,

5:45

those are the gentler ones. Yeah, you gotta

5:47

make yourself big I'm

5:50

afraid of bears because of the movie

5:52

back country cocaine bear And cocaine bear

5:54

and also the revenant. Have you seen

5:57

grizzly man? Oh Yeah,

6:00

that was my dad with grizzly he

6:02

dies in the end Man, just like

6:04

audio of him getting mauled by griddle. I said

6:07

that that was my dad. He died We

6:11

all die in the end, but yeah, he

6:13

got killed by pears Grace oh that guy

6:15

is not the guy that they talked about that

6:17

There's like audio of him being

6:19

killed by a bear and then like a version

6:22

going around You don't know if it's real or not.

6:24

Yeah, cuz they don't play it in the movie. They

6:26

just show somebody listening to it It's

6:29

like a family member. Yeah, but there is a

6:31

version like out on YouTube But everyone's like nah

6:33

that can't be the real one like him and

6:35

his girlfriend, right? Do they play the audio in

6:37

the movie? No, he just said that's in headphones

6:41

That's horrifying. Mm-hmm. Yeah,

6:44

I wasn't it like he stayed longer than he should

6:46

have like they were gonna go back I couldn't

6:48

have been there ever Well,

6:51

you called the grizzly man, what else are

6:53

you gonna fucking do Walmart? This isn't the

6:55

same guy I would imagine that made a

6:57

suit of armor so he could fight a

7:00

bear is it do you guys know

7:02

about that? Oh, yeah, this footage of that guy too

7:04

of him like getting hit by cars No,

7:11

I think he died hmm in

7:14

a tragic accident the air related Bear

7:17

related, you know, just probably like

7:19

high-impact related If you dedicate your life

7:21

to building armor to fight bears, you're

7:23

not going out on your fucking sleep

7:27

You're going out in traffic off a

7:29

mountain How do you want to

7:31

go out? Oh, oh kicking and

7:33

screaming man Kicking and

7:35

screaming bears. I want to death terrifies me. I

7:37

don't like thinking about it. Let's think about it

7:39

then I want

7:43

it to be as peaceful and I don't know

7:46

about it as possible Oh, yeah, like who's gonna

7:48

sit here and be like I Want to be

7:50

as painful as possible. I want to be as

7:52

long and painful as it can possibly be Yeah,

7:55

I guess that's true. Like how does anybody want

7:57

to go out when I'm a hundred and five?

8:00

I want to go out like Chris Hemsworth in

8:02

Red Dawn, which I watched two nights ago How

8:04

does he go out for the shot in the

8:06

head? It has no idea that it's coming after

8:08

like a really precious moment with his brother Do

8:11

you want? So you want

8:13

to be shot in the back of the

8:15

head in front of your brother? By

8:19

someone from North Korea, yeah,

8:21

okay. Well, we can make that happen. Yeah,

8:23

we have a lot of poll on this

8:26

podcast And the

8:28

real brain leak is the bullet in the back

8:31

Do you actually want to be? Why

8:36

in like a heroic way

8:38

maybe I said you went to

8:40

therapy today, right? Yeah, I

8:42

gotta wrap this up No,

8:47

but like if you get shot in the

8:49

head chances are you don't know what's coming That's

8:51

true and people are gonna be talking about it unless you're

8:53

looking at the person with a gun pointed at you Yeah,

8:55

and he's like counting down from 500 I'm

9:01

pretty sure the bullets in your brain before you realize

9:03

it's left the gun Depending

9:06

on the distance. Yeah, it's like

9:08

lightning What about

9:10

what about implosion cuz

9:12

I have been so fast you have no

9:14

idea Then you get in the sub and

9:17

go underwater careful. Oh, you could you could

9:19

be you could be somewhere else They

9:21

probably have implosion tanks You

9:24

want to intentionally implode yourself,

9:27

I don't know what's happened. There's another word for that and I don't

9:29

think we should be talking about What

9:33

let's talk about it because

9:35

when I Am

9:38

poo You

9:42

talk about the submarine yeah after

9:44

it happened, yeah I

9:50

Don't want to be aware. I don't

9:52

know if I want to live Really

9:54

really long. I don't want to

9:56

be alive when my body's not working

9:59

on You know

10:01

yeah, there's definitely a diminishing

10:03

returns when it comes to this meat

10:05

sack of mine Mm-hmm, and that happened

10:07

six years ago. Let's talk about longevity.

10:10

Let's talk about sun exposure like in

10:12

bed hydration Yeah, cold exposure. Here we

10:14

go. I can last I can last like 35

10:16

minutes on a day too

10:19

if I'm really horny in

10:21

what You're talking about

10:24

longevity So

10:28

many times I want to eat healthy in my life so

10:31

many times I want to work out and I want

10:33

to I want to like get things back on track I

10:35

don't want to be ordering food all the time, but

10:37

the thing that always stops me Legitimately

10:40

is the fact that I have to go to the

10:42

store and buy stuff You're telling me I have to

10:44

go to the store buy food come home cook it

10:47

eat it and then do that

10:49

all over again Constantly it just

10:51

never ends life is a treadmill of pain,

10:53

but looking for us Hello

10:56

fresh exists. I've used hello fresh in the

10:58

past to help cook some food You

11:00

can go to their website pick out some meals

11:02

that you want for the week They deliver it

11:04

to your doorstep, but not only do to deliver

11:07

the stuff before that meal They give you instructions

11:09

on how to cook it and they have it

11:11

all portioned out perfectly already So all

11:13

you have to do is follow the steps throw

11:15

stuff in and it makes cooking actually fun And

11:18

I learned stuff as I was doing it I learned

11:20

how to make like a peppercorn sauce for the first

11:22

time that I ever did I had never cooked steak

11:24

at home before I used to always think you can

11:26

only get good steak from going to a restaurant Turns

11:29

out the way my parents had cooked steak when

11:31

I was younger. They were the problem

11:33

not the food So I ended up

11:35

getting steaks through hello fresh learn how to cook that that

11:37

way Got a perfect medium rare

11:39

steak the way I like it. You can

11:41

cook however you want whatever meals you want

11:44

They have so many options for you as

11:46

well. It's a terrific service. I highly recommend

11:48

it I've used it a bunch and

11:51

it saved me so much time and hassle

11:53

and stress and I Actually learned how to cook

11:55

and had fun with it as well I had music on in the background

11:57

as I was cooking it was great But what I learned is that I'm

11:59

not a cook cook You

16:00

do? Yes. Because

16:02

you inspired me for a short

16:04

period of time to try and better

16:07

my health and then I stopped. Good job.

16:10

I wake up in your

16:12

spare room and I work

16:14

as hard as I can to get out of bed for the day. And

16:18

then I come crawling out and I

16:20

say, Ethan, are you there? Let me

16:22

just... Are we

16:24

going to be okay today?

16:26

Ethan, are you there? I

16:29

want breakfast. Spencer

16:32

ignores me. Spencer

16:34

ignores everybody. Not Jocelyn. Do

16:37

you want to talk about morning routines? I do. Yeah.

16:41

Okay. Because you're all about routines. You're

16:43

very good at routines. Guys, I just said we made fun

16:45

of Joe Rogan. Well, when I talk about Joe Rogan, I'm

16:47

talking about Dr. Andrew Huberman. Yeah, who's on

16:49

Joe Rogan. I don't know who that is. He

16:52

is a giant of a man with a big beard. I don't need

16:54

to know about any individual other than

16:56

yourself and your routine. And

16:59

why certain things may or may

17:01

not work for you. Okay.

17:04

Now this is a health and fitness

17:06

and educational podcast. You ready to

17:08

make the transition? I'm going to go on my... I have no problem

17:11

going on my phone, George. Do you want

17:13

to use the bathroom? Now's the time. Wake

17:17

up with the sun. Yes. Get

17:20

that sun exposure. Chug eight, 16

17:22

ounces of water. Pink

17:24

Himalayan sea salt. Hydrate your body. Why? Because

17:27

it's fucking cool. It's dry. You can

17:29

sleep for hopefully eight full hours. Well,

17:31

I understand the water. I

17:33

can't wait for people in the comments to be like... He's

17:36

one of those guys. Pick it apart. Yeah. By

17:38

the way, I took one year of community college for music

17:40

business. What's

17:45

the salt in there for?

17:47

Electrolytes. Electrolytes. Salt actually hydrates you. Just don't take

17:49

it before you go to bed after a big

17:51

night of drinking. It'll destroy you. Why

17:54

not just have like a Gatorade or something?

17:56

You could, because we're all influencers. I

18:01

don't have a chocolate. You have

18:03

prime in your fridge which is notorious for having

18:05

a lack of salt. It doesn't

18:08

have the electrolyte you need apparently. Well

18:11

you need potassium and sodium and

18:14

magnesium. No, magnesium. But

18:17

salt is the one that you lose most during workouts. Because

18:21

of the tears. And

18:23

the blood and sweat. So you go outside, you

18:25

look at the sun for 10 minutes. Drink water, stare at the

18:27

sun, scream at the sun as can. Get

18:29

your perrenium, sunbathing, sweat a little bit.

18:34

Oh yeah, do you do that? Do

18:38

you naturally bleach your asshole?

18:40

Yeah, it's all blonde down

18:42

there. It's like that. And

18:46

then you want to do like a 3 minute cold

18:48

plunge in water between like 37 and

18:51

50 degrees Fahrenheit. We don't

18:53

use that here. You're

18:55

Canadian. I'm European. We're

18:58

allowed to say Celsius. Yeah, you can override

19:00

me. This is huge. I don't actually know

19:02

what it is in Celsius. 3 to 8

19:04

degrees Celsius. You've

19:06

been ruined. 3 to 8

19:08

degrees Celsius. Oh my god. I

19:10

hate... There's shame on my

19:12

belly. There's cheese on

19:14

my shirt. I was just

19:17

talking about health and fitness. I

19:21

had a cheeseburger and 4 left over hushpuppies

19:23

on the way here. This

19:27

is why you shouldn't listen to anything we say on

19:29

this podcast. Do you think that

19:31

that negates your morning routine? You

19:36

wake up and you drink 16 ounces of water, you stand in

19:38

the sun, you do the cold plunge, and then you... You

19:41

do whatever you want. A cold big towel

19:43

on the burger. It's a

19:46

rifle through Ethan's fridge to try to find

19:48

something that's not expired. There's even condiments. There's

19:51

AG1 from December 2021 in your

19:53

fridge. some

20:00

semi-sum liquid ivy

20:02

though I drink that too

20:04

much sugar what there's a

20:07

zero sugar version is there

20:09

yeah oh sign me up what are they instead

20:11

the stuff that gives you cancer all

20:14

gonna give you cancer at the end of

20:16

the day body temple what's

20:20

the deal with the cold blends looks

20:23

cool like why what does

20:26

it do truthfully I like

20:28

the benefits that I noticed the most are like are

20:30

the ones that positively

20:32

affect your mental health because you're putting your

20:34

body in like extreme stress and you're forcing

20:36

yourself to just breathe enough time to fucking

20:39

think about anything yeah I

20:41

mean you get to a certain point where you

20:44

do think I'm going to

20:46

die and your whole life lashes before you know

20:48

that's what I mean your body's not like what if

20:50

something bad happens today it's like something bad is happening

20:52

right now I need to deal with this I

20:55

mean it completely changes your like your state

20:57

because you're waking up your groggy you're tired

21:00

if you jump in a pool of cold water you

21:02

go into fight or flight and

21:05

you get this dopamine kick that's supposed to be the equivalent

21:08

of doing like a wine of cocaine but it lasts

21:10

for six hours instead

21:12

of 15 minutes why does it last for

21:14

six hours I

21:17

don't fucking know cuz nature's beautiful we're good

21:19

to swear on this podcast right yeah fuck I

21:21

don't know man I have no idea I didn't

21:27

even swear well I already

21:30

swared I don't know I was asking for

21:32

forgiveness more than anything fine I

21:34

did do the cold plunge I

21:37

think twice I think yeah listen I don't

21:39

want to encourage anyone to cold plunge because someone's probably

21:41

gonna have a heart attack at some point yeah and

21:43

I don't want to be on the hook for that

21:45

yeah and I think like asthmatics have issues with it

21:47

and you're breathing it's fucked let's go

21:49

figure that out we should can we

21:51

cut in a cold plunge right

21:53

here we're going to the cold plunge we did

21:56

say we would do a cold plunge video at

21:58

your cold plunge mmm super we did I don't

22:00

want everyone to see my tiny pee pee. It

22:03

gets so small. Yeah, it's the

22:05

body's wonderful thing What if

22:08

you what's the smallest prediction? If

22:11

you could say a percentage loss Huh,

22:15

what would that look like? It looks like a clown

22:17

nose And

22:21

the ball they're nowhere to be found no What

22:25

if you're uncut what does that look like I

22:29

couldn't imagine like the top of a balloon Like

22:33

the top of a tied-up balloon. Yeah, that's

22:35

fair. You guys have both seen my

22:37

penis. Yep. Yep. I've seen yours Who

22:41

was I talking to about this? There

22:45

man, I don't remember maybe I Don't

22:48

remember who I was talking to about this.

22:51

I've seen Seen my

22:53

penis you've seen my penis. I've not

22:55

seen you. I've not seen Sean's penis.

22:57

Nope. How's the time? You're

23:03

not gonna be able to see it Too

23:08

quick distance is a thing damn. Well,

23:11

I got a hog

23:13

and he's afraid to

23:15

scare everybody I'm afraid of

23:17

what the world might think to look like Willem

23:19

Dafoe. So just look at me different I think

23:21

it's true his penis being big.

23:24

Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, I think there's pictures

23:26

on the internet It's

23:31

you guys want anything Kevin

23:35

Hart has a really good bit about hit like seeing

23:38

his dad walking around naked Well,

23:51

Willem Dafoe's penis would be very normal

23:53

in the cold Very

23:57

normal the cold ones is kind of

23:59

fun though During, it's awful. But once you get

24:01

out, you're like, Ooh, I feel nice. It's almost like

24:03

the thing he said that it's a dopamine rush for

24:05

six hours. Six hours.

24:08

Sounds too much. Depends

24:10

on what's in the water. And you start doing some cocaine right after.

24:12

How how

24:16

often should you do it? If

24:18

you did it every day? So studies are based

24:20

on 12 minutes per week. That's

24:24

four times a week. You do three minutes. It'd

24:27

be six times a week at two minutes. Twelve

24:30

times a week at one minute. You

24:33

do 24, three times a week, four minutes. Let's

24:36

not get into math here, lads. Or you

24:38

could do one time. Twelve minutes. But

24:41

yeah, you don't even need to do it once.

24:43

So you think viewership's going down. Oh,

24:47

we're hoping the doll brings it back a bit. What's

24:50

her name again? Imelda. And the

24:52

sommelier from Bourbon.

24:55

Sierra. And

24:57

what's your name? Hey

25:02

there, bookaroo, Buster Brown.

25:05

Are you out there skedaddling all your

25:07

money away? You're out there. Oh,

25:10

I'm going to sign up for this. I'm going

25:12

to sign up for that. Oh, maybe this one

25:14

as well. Photo app that for some reason I

25:16

have to sign up for and pay for to get

25:18

filters. Not anymore. Stop

25:21

signing up for stuff that you're just going to forget

25:23

about and lose all your money to. But

25:25

if you want to keep track of it

25:27

all, you know where I'm going with this.

25:30

We've done it before. It's Rocket Money. Rocket

25:32

Money is a personal finance app that helps

25:34

you cancel your unwanted subscriptions, it monitors your

25:37

spending and helps you lower your bills all

25:39

in one place. Look, I've done it too.

25:41

It's called a spade a spade. I'm guilty

25:43

of it as well. The amount

25:46

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26:37

Save money. Justin,

26:41

we were talking in the last episode, we

26:43

had our little holiday leak

26:45

miss episode and we were talking about

26:47

New Year's resolutions. Oh. Do you have

26:49

any... You're very goal oriented, man. Do

26:51

you have any goals for this next

26:53

year? He tries to be because his

26:55

life's a mess. It's a fucking disaster.

27:00

I'm barreling into

27:02

New Year's high speed train

27:04

with no fucking brain. It's the

27:06

ground running! Oh,

27:08

you can hit the ground real hard. I'm

27:10

sprinting. I don't know if I'm sprinting away

27:12

from something or towards... Well,

27:15

that's up to you. It's

27:17

up to you to decide, isn't it? Yeah, no, I'm

27:20

pumped. I don't think that you need to wait until January

27:22

1st to make set goals and change your

27:24

life. That's fair. That is a good

27:27

point. But I choose to. Yeah, it

27:29

makes me like everybody else. I have

27:31

something to talk about. I have a collection of before

27:34

photos that I would always take

27:36

in December after Christmas. You're like extra fat.

27:40

Five years worth of me getting fatter

27:42

and fucking fatter. No

27:46

after pics? No after. There

27:48

was that three months... Technically, the next December

27:50

is the after pics from the previous one.

27:53

You put it in reverse order

27:55

and you're good to go. You come back

27:57

and someone dies. Like, you know

27:59

how there's like a... a hidden folder of photos on your phone

28:01

where you get people put like, shit

28:03

that they don't want people to see, like nudes, nudes. Mine's

28:06

just a bunch of pictures of me looking fat. Some

28:08

of them are in your bathroom. Some

28:11

of them are in my bathroom? Yeah, yeah. Oh,

28:13

like the pictures were taken there. Yeah, I

28:15

have a camera in there. What did

28:18

you think he meant was in your bathroom? I thought he

28:20

meant some of these photos, like you printed them out. You

28:23

put them on the mirror so you could look

28:25

at it every day. Inspiration. Motivation Monday. Who's

28:28

your motivation? Who do you want

28:30

to be like? Me. I

28:32

want to be like me. How's that working out? So

28:34

far, it's a little easier. Cheeser.

28:41

I don't even know if it's cheese. I don't even know

28:43

what it is. Could be anything. I'm

28:46

surprised you were so into like, bettering

28:49

yourself and like learning and doing all that

28:51

kind of stuff, but you haven't tapped into

28:53

philosophy all that much. Because

28:56

for me that was like the big game changer for me and I was

28:58

like that stoic guy going around being like, guys, you got to do this.

29:00

The problem is I've got a terrible memory.

29:03

I used to listen to like a two

29:05

minute stoic podcast every morning and I'd be

29:07

like, that is words to live

29:09

by. And then I'd

29:11

be like, oh, I haven't 30. I stressed

29:13

out and you know. And I was listening to my audio book about it.

29:15

I had to take notes. Yeah. And

29:18

I would reference those and like highlight bits. What

29:20

are some words that you live by? There's

29:24

a lot of stuff outside of your control

29:26

and external influences shouldn't impact your emotions as

29:28

much as they do. And

29:31

that you can only control what you're doing

29:33

and hope that you're going down the right path. Well,

29:36

both of you are very

29:38

beholden to other people. Yeah.

29:41

And that's why I started listening to the audio

29:43

book to try and not be beholden to other

29:45

people anymore. What do you do that you know

29:47

your fans don't like, but you do it anyway?

29:50

Not upload. Yeah. I think

29:52

I had a big issue with

29:54

the parasocial aspect of. my

30:00

community and I think I was listening

30:03

way too much to what other people were saying about me and like

30:07

putting my life in brackets that they were like

30:09

making up for me and then I

30:11

stopped doing that and a large portion of my audience

30:13

kind of like fell off because they're not getting that

30:16

attention anymore. There's not

30:18

that like open communication as much anymore but

30:21

now the people that I'm left with are like cool.

30:25

Quality over quantity. Yeah. I

30:28

think I started being meaner to my audience which

30:32

I think was good for me because

30:35

everyone for such a long time babied

30:37

me constantly and was like oh you

30:39

don't know anybody you're the baby of

30:41

the group and then I just started

30:45

being a bit more of an asshole to

30:47

my audience and calling them out more and

30:50

you also got super hot. Stop

30:52

and ripped. Well that was

30:54

last year. Yeah.

30:57

I told him that people were taking pictures of him

30:59

for thank miss talking about how big and sexy his

31:01

arms were and I agree that shirt was a choice.

31:03

I feel uncomfortable

31:06

talking about my body. Cute voice.

31:08

Yeah people babied me. I don't

31:11

know why. What's going

31:14

on? What would Ethan like to talk about? I like

31:16

these shirt and thank you. I like these

31:21

pants. What kind

31:23

of material would a guy be

31:25

looking for if he wanted to get pants

31:27

like those? No

31:30

one knows. I don't actually know what these

31:32

are. It's not about being a baby. You're

31:34

allowed to be a baby. That's another thing. You're allowed

31:36

to be a child and you're allowed to be an

31:38

adult at the same time. I

31:40

converted into one and then I was like

31:42

I don't need to do that. I

31:44

like my child like sensibilities. But

31:47

I can be very serious when I need to be. Yeah. I

31:49

think people are afraid to be

31:51

or have child like tendencies

31:54

or like immature tendencies because they're afraid people

31:56

won't take them seriously. I think that's what

31:58

it is. I think that's- That's what I

32:00

got frustrated with, no one ever took me seriously.

32:03

Did they or did you not take

32:05

yourself seriously? So you beat a grown

32:07

man up in front of hundreds

32:10

of thousands of people? That'll

32:13

do it! To be fair,

32:16

there was a definite switch in people's

32:18

opinions after that fight. There was a

32:20

very big shift, yeah. If

32:22

you're a little emasculated bitch boy and

32:24

you want to be taken more seriously, sign

32:27

up for Creator Clash. Which

32:29

Justin also does. I do that. Justin

32:31

organized Creator Clash last year. Positive

32:34

comments only please, thank you. No,

32:37

Creator Clash is a special event. It

32:39

is. There's a lot of noise around it and

32:43

negativity, but at its core, I

32:45

mean you can speak to it a little bit. Like

32:48

the journey from not boxing at all to then going,

32:51

what is it, five two minute rounds for

32:54

some people. It

32:56

takes a tremendous amount of training and hard work.

32:59

I think as far as the actual

33:01

event goes, I don't think there's another

33:03

event like Creator Clash

33:06

that has the pull that it

33:08

has. This last year,

33:10

there were people that weren't

33:12

happy or whatever, but it still turned out to

33:14

be an amazing event that had

33:16

a sold out arena and

33:18

everyone there had such a good attitude

33:21

and there was so much energy. If

33:23

only the people who were there promoted it more. Calling

33:26

everyone out because I'm not a part of this event. I

33:29

promoted it. No, you promoted it. You're

33:31

always good about that stuff. You even promote my

33:34

coffee and my fucking thank miss

33:36

and everything. I think that goes

33:38

along with being afraid of your fan

33:41

base a little bit or being afraid of

33:43

how you'll be perceived. I think promoting something

33:45

before it happens, you're taking a risk. Yeah,

33:47

that stigma is still there, over promoting to

33:50

your audience and not wanting to like promote

33:52

it. Yes, but also not knowing what

33:54

you're promoting because it hasn't happened yet. The

33:56

number of people who created content after Creator Clash,

33:58

after it was like a actually a cool

34:01

event. Yeah. And it looked good

34:03

and there was you know hundreds of creators there. You

34:06

know there were hundreds of videos. I guess there's the fear

34:08

as well that you don't want to show off your training

34:10

in case your opponent sees it. I

34:12

mean yeah but you can still promote

34:14

it without showing your training. At the end of

34:16

the day it's for charity. For

34:19

fun. And that's the other thing too

34:21

is even if you were showing off your

34:23

training the skill level that everybody is at

34:25

is not great enough that you would be

34:27

able to do anything with that information anyway.

34:30

Yeah. I

34:33

would like to say you said there's a lot of talk

34:35

and noise around it but I also think that that stuff

34:38

as an outside perspective because I wasn't involved in

34:40

the event as heavily as you two were like

34:42

I don't see that stuff as much. I

34:45

don't really go on Twitter and stuff as much anymore so

34:47

I don't really see anything like that. Yeah. So it's like

34:49

when you go and you're just part of it I think

34:51

that's what people need to remember is like when you're there

34:53

it's nothing but positivity. Yeah. It does come

34:55

with a lot of nonsense. It's not the majority. It's just

34:57

loud voices and it cuts through and people

34:59

like conflict and drama that they latch onto. What

35:01

you need to do is ignore it and keep

35:04

your head down. If there's legitimacy to it then

35:06

you listen and you adapt and you evolve and

35:08

you change and then

35:10

you say okay we won't do that again. But

35:13

a lot of it is just like people

35:15

being pissed off for no reason. Well there

35:17

was reasons but yeah

35:19

whatever. I don't fucking

35:21

care. That's why I'm not... Dude I mean kudos

35:24

to Ian and Anissa for powering through all of

35:26

that. Yeah. I should say that they are two

35:28

of the most like empathetic like kind people and

35:30

all they wanted to do is make

35:33

this event work and be a success and

35:35

do something special. Yeah. And the amount of

35:37

the amount of shit that they had to deal with on

35:39

a personal level. Yeah. That's

35:42

what we were saying. The only people that get cancelled are the

35:44

people who are empathetic like

35:46

Agena Marbles. Like she didn't really

35:48

get cancelled but people were like trying to bring up shit

35:51

and then she was like

35:53

I just want people to be happy and I just

35:55

can't handle people being upset by anything I do so

35:58

I'm just gonna leave. And then as soon as... that

36:00

happened everyone like backtracks

36:02

and was like wait no yeah

36:05

don't leave that's too late she

36:07

didn't really get cancelled and she didn't cancel herself but

36:11

I think it's the people with like a big

36:13

heart that are affected most by that kind of

36:15

stuff yeah a

36:18

heart what do

36:20

you guys think about cancel culture oh

36:23

baby I think

36:26

it's a necessary

36:29

nonsense yeah I

36:31

just realized sorry nevermind no

36:33

no your cable matches your chair oh and

36:36

it's nice careful boys what'll happen rattlesnakes

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36:56

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37:00

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37:03

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38:20

get yourself some grub how

38:25

much time do you spend trying to please other people if

38:28

you could do like a percentage in

38:30

your day is

38:32

that including making videos well

38:35

do you make those videos for yourself or for other

38:37

people until the video mostly

38:39

for others I'd

38:42

say 70 percent maybe

38:46

brother tie maybe more very high yeah how

38:49

often do you do things that you don't

38:53

want to do just because you're afraid to say

38:55

no to people mostly if you could

38:57

spend a week doing only what you wanted

38:59

to do this podcast just because you're afraid

39:01

to say no to me do

39:04

I make a podcast yeah yeah no I like

39:06

I like doing the podcast there's a lot of

39:08

things that I do that I like doing but

39:10

there's also a lot of I constantly

39:13

double book myself knowing

39:16

like someone will ask me to do something

39:19

I know that I have a thing going on

39:21

at that time I will still say yes because

39:23

I don't want to say no to them and

39:25

then I will later disappoint both people yeah remember

39:27

when we went out dune boogying in Pam Springs

39:30

and then Ethan drove us all there and then

39:32

I drove he was like shit

39:34

I have an appointment back so I'll

39:36

drive two hours back and

39:39

then you guys go to boogying and then

39:41

we're drive and then three hours back you

39:43

spent like nine hours of your day driving

39:46

to do like a 20 minute thing yeah

39:48

I didn't you didn't do it you do the

39:50

thing I drove everyone remember I drove everyone there

39:52

and I went guys I have to go and

39:55

then I left and then I

39:57

came back to the house but you didn't you didn't

39:59

do the thing that you left for oh no

40:01

I did the thing that I left for oh and get to do the

40:03

do what are you doing I

40:07

can't remember I think a recording thing yeah I

40:09

thought you would have remembered doing bugging I

40:11

would I remember doing boogie that was fucking

40:13

tight that was the most I've ever had

40:16

we should do that again we should

40:18

go do that for the first time for me

40:23

you should have a travel show like

40:25

you and McGregor's like biking across America

40:28

kind of thing yeah whenever you can decide

40:30

to get a motorcycle we should we should

40:32

do that yeah is that the one

40:34

with the otters you

40:36

and McGregor that clip with him yeah yeah

40:38

yeah okay how old is

40:41

Ewan McGregor they need like adopt someone

40:43

or something because of that show he like

40:46

met a kid and then like fell in love with them

40:48

and heard their story and I was like

40:50

I'm gonna adopt you and then did whoa

40:53

daughters no

40:56

daughter you

40:59

McGregor is like okay if you see something

41:03

something like that we could go how

41:05

old is Ewan McGregor Jamie

41:08

pull it up Siri pull

41:10

it up we could go

41:12

do bugging right now who's

41:14

helping us I don't want to let's talk

41:16

about all the things that we want to

41:18

do that's what this podcast is and then

41:21

release the podcast in six to eight months

41:24

when we 've done we've done all of them

41:26

hmm okay hmm we'll go

41:28

skydiving we'll go and we will call the journey till

41:30

death do us part he first one to

41:32

die loses wings depends

41:35

on your perspective who

41:39

is that funny to you yeah

41:41

really funny didn't you hear us

41:43

laughing everyone at home is laughing as well I

41:45

wish I had life what's

41:49

your name Matilda no and Mel

41:51

that I will kill you

41:54

I know Mel that did it come

41:58

with a nametag she didn't know I

42:01

just made up the name. Why Amelda? She looks

42:03

like an Amelda. Sounds like Melba toast. You

42:07

know, Melba toast. That's what I was going to give at

42:09

our dinner last night was a little toast. You didn't give

42:11

a toast. No, because I did it at thank miss. And

42:14

then we did like a little toast with champagne afterwards and

42:16

I was like, thank you to everyone who was here. Most

42:20

of the people at the dinner last night

42:22

weren't at thank miss. That's so true. I

42:24

think it's crazy. Listen, you raised $6 million.

42:27

We raised like

42:29

three days ago and I feel like you've already just

42:31

moved on from it. Yeah, I'm

42:34

dead inside. Isn't

42:36

that how it works though? You know, I mean,

42:38

what am I supposed to do? Go around with

42:40

a fucking badge that says I raised $6 million.

42:42

Yeah. I mean, you got a plaque, but it's

42:44

spelled wrong. Yeah. No

42:46

one will know that you raised that

42:48

money. I think because you do

42:51

it for the right reasons and not because you're trying to like

42:53

build yourself up out of it that I'm not. I don't

42:55

wear that as like a badge of like, yeah, I'm better,

42:57

but I'm cool because I did

42:59

that. I understand what you're saying, Justin, where it's

43:01

like, why don't you like sit in it for

43:03

a little bit and enjoy the victory? But like,

43:05

how do you do that? I did

43:07

that all Sunday, the day after. I

43:10

feel like you, but you like, you

43:13

can't, like everyone's moved on to the next

43:15

thing already. Yeah. Yeah. That's just the modern

43:17

world, baby. I didn't talk about that in

43:19

a video that I think I'm uploading today.

43:21

That was like, like Avengers end

43:23

game and stuff come out and it's like biggest thing

43:25

in the planet. It was everywhere. And now it's

43:27

like, who even fucking cares anymore? Yeah.

43:29

I watched that movie once a month. Avengers

43:32

end game. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Have you watched

43:35

it in the movie room? No.

43:37

How often do you watch Infinity War? Once

43:40

a month. Good. That's

43:42

a, actually watch them both once a

43:44

month. Yeah. I love Marvel movies. You're

43:47

the problem. Are they sponsor? No. God,

43:49

I wish that would be sick. We

43:51

didn't have to report a podcast episode

43:54

for like a year. Yeah. I

43:57

think infinity war's way better than end game. I

44:00

haven't seen Infinity War since seeing Endgame. I thought

44:02

you were gonna say I haven't seen Infinity War.

44:04

I know, so that's our twisting nipples. I just

44:06

like the action and the witty

44:08

characters. I think it's just fun. You

44:12

know, don't think too much about it. That's why they are.

44:14

Yeah, and now all the new ones fucking suck. What

44:17

new? Oh yeah. All

44:20

of them. Well, like which ones? I haven't watched

44:22

the newest. Fucking Black Widow. Ant-Man.

44:25

Black Widow? Didn't see

44:27

that. Charlize. I

44:30

just went and saw... Scout Johansson. The Marvels?

44:33

The Marvels? The Marvels? Captain Marvel?

44:36

Fucking movie stuck. I just saw the Marvels.

44:38

It was fine. Why would

44:40

you go to the cinema to watch that? I don't know.

44:42

Why would you do that to yourself? I'm over here saying

44:45

Godzilla Minus One is out. And

44:47

it's the best Godzilla movie ever made. And

44:49

yet you're watching the Marvels. You

44:52

hadn't seen The Lighthouse until you came to my house. And

44:54

you go to the cinema to watch the Marvels. Well,

44:57

no, no, no. I went to the Marvels because

44:59

my friend invited me to go see a movie. And

45:02

I was like, I'm not doing anything. Sure. Why

45:04

not? Sure. I'm just

45:06

going to lambaste you for a while. I

45:09

do want to see Godzilla Minus One. Why is he Minus

45:11

One? I think they're going to try

45:13

to get it because it takes place during like World War Two. So

45:15

they're like trying to go back to the beginning. World

45:17

War One. Because

45:20

it's not an allegory for that. Godzilla

45:23

is an allegory for the Hiroshima bomb. Can

45:25

you define allegory for me? It's

45:28

like the four kind of. What

45:31

is the actual definition for allegory?

45:33

It's one of those words that's like, I know what

45:35

it means. But I couldn't tell you

45:37

what it means. It's like irony.

45:39

It's like, huh? It's like lambaste.

45:43

Anyway, everyone go see Godzilla Minus One, best Godzilla in

45:45

years. Shin Godzilla is great, but the human element is

45:47

kind of like, eh. Better than

45:51

sound design wise than any of the others. How's

45:53

the sound? 14 Godzilla is

45:55

goated for sound design. It is

45:57

pretty sweet. But

45:59

it's. Justin what's going on? I'm having a great time.

46:01

You can be part of the conversation, but you choose not to

46:03

be so now you're just being I'm

46:06

trying to think of another cool word an allegory You're

46:10

being so allegorical right now. You're just

46:12

being an allegory. It's that

46:14

vice president guy Joe Biden

46:16

allegory You

46:22

know My

46:28

God sometimes I I'm so upset by the

46:30

way that last night at dinner we

46:33

had ribs on the table and somebody was leaving and

46:37

They were like I got to go home and take care of my baby, and

46:40

I said oh you could bring some of those Bring

46:43

your baby back ribs I Did

46:46

and no one laughs no I went

46:48

across the table I went Like

46:51

that and I turned to you and I was a good one huh,

46:53

and you went yes great And

46:55

I told it to Evelyn afterwards I was like no one laughed

46:57

at my joke and she was like I would have laughed so

46:59

hard if I heard that I was like you sitting next to

47:01

me each project more You

47:04

could bring your baby back ribs That's

47:07

funny. Oh, and I was so happy I thought of

47:09

it in like a split second and no one laughs

47:11

So I was sad for the rest of the dinner

47:14

Well, it sounds like the dinner was that why we didn't go

47:17

out after yeah, we all went to bed We

47:19

were all thrilled to be going to bed. Yeah

47:21

I don't pride myself on much But my ability

47:23

to make a joke really quickly is like the

47:26

only thing I'll give myself credit for So

47:28

when it doesn't go well Not

47:31

only that you are very very quick, but

47:33

you also have great callback your memory isn't

47:36

I've never seen anything like it Thank you.

47:38

I can't remember anything You'll

47:42

remember See

47:49

memory Don't

47:53

be a even you have a good memory too.

47:55

No, I don't I have a horrible memory Well,

47:57

you don't you have here's the thing you both

47:59

have good memories for strange little details

48:01

about me. Like what? Explain

48:04

when I've had a good memory. Sean tells me stories

48:06

about me all the time that I've never... I was

48:08

telling you a story about a lovely night we had

48:10

out and you were like, I don't remember. You were

48:12

like, I love Montreal. We got poutine for breakfast with

48:14

your brother. Yeah, we went to a Spee-Pee-Dee-Bear. We talked

48:16

about... I talked about my relationship with my family and

48:18

so did you. And we bonded. Oh,

48:21

well... And it was like, on top of love. Conversations about

48:23

family were involved. Those are going to be suppressed. Mm. Yep.

48:27

What do I remember? I

48:31

put the topic over to him. To Ethan? Yeah,

48:34

Ethan. Uh, geez. What can I

48:36

say? Where to begin with Ethan?

48:39

Sounds like it's time to special for

48:41

a roast. When is the

48:44

roast of Jacksepticeye happening and you're going to sit

48:46

in a big ol' coffee mug? I

48:48

did say I wanted to do that next year. I had to

48:51

get thankmas out of the way first. I don't like that

48:53

idea. I don't like the idea of people saying bad things

48:55

about you. I even love it. It's not bad.

48:58

It's... Also, you're going to roast everyone so

49:00

much harder than they roast you. No,

49:02

because my... Yeah. My

49:05

roast, like, I don't know, like, the surface level

49:07

to go to. To be

49:09

like, haha, you don't upload

49:11

or something like that. Like, those

49:13

are like such non-insults. But

49:16

to me, I'd be like, so,

49:18

afraid you're going to die alone, huh? Yeah.

49:22

Yeah. See?

49:28

Jocelyn's loving this episode. She's

49:31

having a great time. Jocelyn thinks that Justin is very funny.

49:33

Jocelyn is... no one's meaner to me

49:36

than Jocelyn. No one's

49:38

meaner than Jocelyn to me, also. Jocelyn

49:40

is just mean. I

49:43

like to think I'm pretty mean to you guys. Come on.

49:46

Hey. She's meaner than I am? You're really

49:48

mean to me. I am. I'm

49:50

not mean to you on

49:52

purpose. I say the jokes

49:54

to you that... the types of jokes that

49:56

you say outwardly. That's how you won my heart. Yeah. Bye.

50:00

I can fuck your dad fucking me and my father.

50:03

Jocelyn's very blunt. You

50:06

got some Dutch honesty in you. Some

50:08

people are blunt by force, but she is

50:10

just... Blunt force drama. Blunt force drama. See

50:15

what I mean? Yeah. The pride is

50:17

beaming in me. You ever have a joke in your head that

50:19

you come up with immediately and you're like, I can't fucking wait

50:21

for this to leave my mouth? And then

50:23

you say it and everyone laughs and you're like, Oh my

50:25

fucking god, this is the greatest thing that's ever happened to

50:27

me. When you laugh really hard at your own joke. It's

50:30

great. Or like you're hanging out with Aaron

50:32

or something and Aaron has the most like

50:34

validating laugh. I love Aaron's laughs. Can we

50:36

get a laugh track of Aaron? Right here.

50:40

Thank you. Isn't it great? You guys have an editor,

50:42

huh? This isn't just gonna be one long shit conversation.

50:46

Can I have this down to four minutes? Yeah.

50:50

Aaron's laugh is amazing. It

50:52

does make me really happy when I can make Aaron

50:54

laugh really hard. It's awesome. Talk

50:57

about like childish

50:59

wonder still encapsulated in a man.

51:01

Yeah. He tries very hard to

51:03

keep his child's life wonder alive. Child's life wonder. He's got so

51:05

much whimsy. He really does.

51:08

One might even say he's got some pep in

51:10

his step. Some beans. Very allegory.

51:14

Very vice president of it. Very allegory.

51:19

Where does a childlike wonder end for you? Ugh.

51:24

Was it after your parents' divorce? When

51:26

did that happen? My

51:29

parents' divorce? Yeah, how old were you? It was like 14 or 15. Ooh,

51:32

tough year. Tender age. Yeah.

51:34

What age were you? I was 15. Damn.

51:38

That's fucking troublesome teens. Yeah. Really driving

51:40

the parents apart. Did

51:43

you think it was your fault? No, I knew

51:45

it was my brother's fault. Why?

51:50

I knew it was my brother's fault. Because

51:52

my dad said it's his fault. This

51:55

is your fault, buddy. I don't know what to tell you. I'd

51:57

love to hate. I'm not much of a liar unless

51:59

it's towards your fault. mother for

52:01

many years and in

52:04

front of God. Is that when the

52:06

whimsy stopped? Whimsy? No I've

52:08

been whimsical for I mean I lost it

52:10

and call it five years ago. Yeah

52:15

I don't like that. It's coming back though. It is full

52:17

force. I like it. There's a spark in your eye again.

52:19

I like it. There's a twinkle. I

52:23

think you know it comes along I think that you need

52:25

to remember when people are like working harder

52:27

and taking on more responsibility. Like when you just like

52:29

have a life to manage it

52:31

can it's very easy to forget that you're

52:34

supposed to be having fun too. Yeah.

52:36

Constantly stressing about maintaining career and money

52:39

and all your shit. What a lot

52:41

of people do. Inflation is a bitch. Nobody

52:43

can afford anything. You got to work your ass off. And

52:46

then you can't afford to have fun. And

52:49

then you hit the weekend and it's like you kind

52:52

of have to save that money. I'm not allowed

52:54

to have fun. Relax from the week because it

52:56

was so hard. Recharge. Get ready for the week.

52:58

But hey let me ask you this. Can you

53:00

afford not to have fun? No.

53:05

Do you think that Michael picked that up? What?

53:08

Burger raffling. The fucking heart

53:10

out of you. Fucking

53:12

tangled around your aorta. I

53:15

cannot afford to not have fun. If I can't

53:17

have fun it's all over. I was

53:20

thinking about this while I was showering this morning. Ooh. What do

53:22

you tell me you were thinking about moving? What do you do

53:24

to have fun? What do you actually

53:26

do that makes you genuinely happy? And

53:29

like beaming? You

53:32

know what I mean? Not to be. Because like you

53:34

paint little things which is cute. My head's not going

53:36

to be that. More

53:39

so like a necessity than having fun.

53:41

That's more meditative yeah. As

53:43

cliche as it sounds it's literally having like

53:45

a Sunday off with Evelyn. And

53:48

like taking the whole day to just hang out. That's

53:51

nice. Hey if you don't want the fucking answer

53:53

don't add the question. It's cute. I

53:55

like it. I like that a lot. I think that you

53:57

and Evelyn have a very very cute beautiful relationship. We do.

54:00

and I'm very happy with it. We're

54:02

all gonna end someday though. Yeah

54:04

because we have to die until death do us

54:06

part. I think if you say

54:08

that in your in your vows

54:11

that if someone wants to get divorced you should

54:13

be allowed kill them till

54:15

death do us part. It's like you said you would

54:17

stick with me until death so if you're want to

54:19

leave I guess I have to shoot you. Whoa! That's

54:22

God's rules. I never even

54:24

thought about that. Yeah and then they go straight to hell. That's

54:27

crazy. Yep. Right?

54:32

I think it's in the vow somewhere. That's like the

54:34

fine print. He's like till death

54:36

do us part and then you'll go to hell. He

54:39

just whispers it under his breath, under his vestments. What

54:41

the hell to you? Both of you.

54:44

This. Um.

54:48

It just feels like we've been doing this since 1973.

54:51

Hell to me is being stuck

54:55

in a zoom call. God.

54:57

That never makes any progress. Everyone's

54:59

trying to fucking leave but there's

55:01

always one more thing. We

55:04

had another thank-mas call recently where it was like we

55:06

got all the stuff needed. It was like we need Sean for anything

55:08

else. Like no we need to talk about something

55:11

else that doesn't need Sean and then they start talking and

55:13

then you were just like see it. I

55:15

was like I'm out.

55:17

I can't. I fucking I don't know how

55:20

you do it most of your job is

55:22

zoom calls and it makes me

55:24

die a little death every time. I started

55:26

liking zoom calls more when I got a

55:28

nice webcam and. You

55:31

should look at yourself like a bird. I make

55:35

myself laugh and if work

55:37

gets done it's

55:40

just a bonus. I do

55:42

good work. I do good work. You

55:44

do excellent work. As

55:46

proven by thank-mas. Unless you

55:48

thought it was bad then no one cares. Thank-mas

55:50

was as close to flawless

55:54

as it could have been. I think

55:56

that we could have actually gotten away with not mentioning

55:58

that the stream was down for like. however

56:01

long it was down for and just gas

56:03

what the people who thought they were watching it yeah

56:06

just like men and we should have come

56:08

out men and blacks everybody in the audience just

56:11

come out with your phone and just turn the flash light on

56:13

and off damn I'll be like you're gonna forget

56:16

everything would have been so much fun of your

56:18

left we could have inglorious bastards to them killed

56:21

them you said it

56:23

not me three

56:25

beers what

56:29

did they do in inglorious bastards

56:31

they burn down the theater with

56:33

everybody inside well it's

56:36

good we didn't do that yeah

56:40

happy about that it was an option that we could have done

56:42

I mean it's always an option you go burn a theater down right

56:44

now if you wanted to it's actually

56:46

it's on a wheel we every time really good touring

56:48

does a show we spin the

56:50

wheel and there's always one

56:53

little million dollar slot and

56:56

it says burn the theater down haven't

56:59

hit it yet but we'll

57:01

know when it happens hey new year's just around

57:04

the corner new year

57:06

new me new wheel same wheel what's

57:09

on the rest of the wheel

57:11

do a great show try harder

57:13

break a leg hmm but

57:15

this sounds like the worst wheel it sounds like

57:17

an excuse to burn a theater down like

57:21

the rest of it is just your job yeah

57:23

it's just what you're supposed to be doing I don't

57:26

know what I'm supposed to be doing and

57:28

people keep giving me things to like like huge

57:30

responsibilities man am I glad to ask I

57:33

asked you to be on thank you I don't

57:36

know what I'm doing what's going on I know

57:38

I'm kidding I talked to my therapist

57:42

about this this morning yeah ever

57:44

heard of imposter syndrome hmm not

57:47

you guys I've played among

57:49

us let's not talk about

57:51

video games like we get

57:56

Jocelyn like that never mind she were

57:58

who for who, Justin? You know

58:01

what? You've ruined it. You've ruined it, Justin. You've

58:03

ruined it. It's all over. You don't like being

58:05

on camera anyway. This is like the person that's

58:07

like, I didn't want to go, but I wanted

58:09

to be invited. I didn't even want it to

58:11

know that you guys wanted me there, but I

58:13

didn't want to go. God, I hate

58:15

it when people do that. That makes me so

58:17

fucking mad. You shouldn't be around those people. I

58:19

know. I shouldn't. Who's

58:21

the person you hate the most right now? The

58:23

person I hate the most right now. I don't

58:26

hate a lot of people. I

58:30

was thinking of, like, I really

58:33

don't think that Donald Trump should be in charge of pretty

58:36

much anything, but I think

58:38

that we should sort of create like a Truman show

58:40

type situation for him. Just watch him.

58:42

So we can watch him act like

58:44

a maniac. Watch him pull off

58:46

his skin. He thinks that he's running the

58:49

whole world. Yeah, you got him.

58:52

Baby in a playpen. He thinks

58:55

it's a complete dictatorship over the

58:57

entire continental United States. I can just see him

58:59

walking around like a little baby in there as well. I'm

59:02

going to do it. I'm going

59:04

to hit the button. He's just

59:07

actually inside the Las Vegas sphere. I

59:10

just have like a thing around him. That

59:14

would be so good. Don't you miss

59:16

him just a little bit? No, just

59:18

a little bit. No, I don't even

59:20

want to joke about that. It's not

59:22

a joke. He's a joke, but he's

59:24

so fucking like he's like he's such

59:26

a character of a human being. Nope.

59:29

I'm going to roll with this one. We've

59:33

never had your Truman show idea. I think I

59:36

think I don't think

59:38

he should be put in charge of laundry.

59:40

I don't think he should be put in

59:42

charge of anything. Yeah, that's what I said.

59:44

It's an allegory. It's an allegory. I'm

59:49

convinced neither of you actually know what an allegory is. No,

59:51

I'm telling you that I don't know what it is.

59:53

It sounds like you don't either. He said it's kind of like a metaphor.

59:55

No, he said that. Which

59:58

is kind of true, right? Listen a

1:00:00

little bit it's closer to a metaphor than it's not

1:00:03

if we can look up the age of yeah, I'm a grabber

1:00:07

You but grabber You

1:00:10

read Gagarin What

1:00:14

is the definition of allegory oh my god

1:00:16

a Story

1:00:19

poem or picture that can be interpreted to

1:00:21

reveal a hidden meaning typically a moral or

1:00:23

political one Can you read that again? No,

1:00:26

I wasn't listening. It's very close

1:00:28

it. That's not symbolism Jocelyn that's

1:00:31

when symbols happen

1:00:37

When you have us like the bat

1:00:39

signal can you start roasting a little bit? I like it when

1:00:41

you're a little bit angry Yeah, give me a rough A little

1:00:43

bit of a roast I do like doing

1:00:45

that that's a very fun energy to be in yeah

1:00:48

I think I like doing it because people know I'm

1:00:50

not serious about it. Yeah, at least I hope so

1:00:52

I'm never sure cuz my love my love language is

1:00:54

making fun of people That's

1:00:56

not what I'm like as soon as you like get upset

1:00:58

about it. Please tell me cuz I don't want to actually

1:01:00

upset anybody Yeah,

1:01:03

aren't they like acts of service and gifts

1:01:05

words of affirmation, which is pretty close to

1:01:07

that My

1:01:10

way of showing that I if

1:01:12

I know what affirmations mean if I'm poking fun, it

1:01:14

means that I like you You

1:01:18

fucking I

1:01:21

Way to get away with saying

1:01:23

really mean things to people that you don't like yeah,

1:01:26

it's a great way of testing the room Yeah,

1:01:28

I do it a lot by making fun of people a

1:01:30

little bit to be like Okay, people are down to clown

1:01:33

and I can tell a person's sense of humor by how

1:01:35

they react to it It's

1:01:39

my litmus test everybody pretty

1:01:41

reckless. Yeah, it's very reckless. I've

1:01:43

met a couple of people who do not like it

1:01:45

But I don't want to be friends with

1:01:47

them. Anyway, did you make anyone

1:01:49

cry though? No, I wish

1:01:51

I Think

1:01:54

I just have Irish humor where

1:01:56

it's like making fun of each other all the time and people don't

1:01:58

get that and they should don't and they

1:02:00

make fun of me for it it's insensitive.

1:02:02

It's called projecting your suppressed trauma that your

1:02:04

family refuses to talk about. Yeah. With one

1:02:06

or another. That's what I said Irish humor.

1:02:08

Yeah. Just defining it for all the non

1:02:10

Irish. Oh I see you're saying the allegory

1:02:12

for it. I

1:02:15

don't know. It's allegory like a

1:02:17

definition? No no no it's

1:02:20

a metaphor for it. It's like

1:02:22

a oh it's like a metaphor. It's like a

1:02:24

metaphorical symbol. It's a representation of something in

1:02:27

a different form. Like

1:02:29

pretty much nailed that. Like

1:02:32

a mother's

1:02:35

love is like a winter coat. That

1:02:40

keeps you warm. What's a

1:02:42

simile? A

1:02:44

simile. Talking about synonyms. What's a simile though? I

1:02:48

thought a simile was when two things are the

1:02:50

same. That's

1:02:53

similar.

1:02:55

He's got

1:02:57

you there. Like

1:02:59

symmetry. I always come back. William

1:03:03

Acton you don't know that yet.

1:03:05

Come on. You

1:03:09

touching each other's toes? It

1:03:16

can't be that. Hello. Here

1:03:18

we go. We're getting silly

1:03:20

now. Oh we've gone

1:03:22

past a serious segment. Hey Justin.

1:03:25

It's for you. It said say

1:03:28

something funny. Hello. Yeah

1:03:30

this is Justin. I'm on your podcast and I don't

1:03:32

know how to act. Justin

1:03:37

you never answered my question about your New

1:03:39

Year's resolutions unless you did and I forgot.

1:03:41

New Year's resolution? With my memory. No he

1:03:43

just said that you don't need to have

1:03:45

a New Year. Do you guys ever have

1:03:47

a... Yeah I shut down your stupid fucking

1:03:50

question. Do you guys have serious

1:03:52

conversations on this podcast? You want to talk about shitting

1:03:54

your pants and... You've listened to

1:03:56

the podcast. Yeah I stopped. As

1:04:03

Ethan would say, this is true. This is true. You

1:04:05

got me on here. You must be digging at the

1:04:07

bottom of the barrel. Crazy.

1:04:10

What a psychotic move. No, I just did

1:04:12

charity over the weekend. I thought I'd do it a

1:04:14

little more. Yeah, it feels good to give, huh? It

1:04:16

feels good to give back to the community. Doing nobody

1:04:18

any way. That has taken so much from me. New

1:04:20

Year's resolution. Hey,

1:04:24

listen. It should, I mean, it should

1:04:26

be kind of, I don't know, it's kind of the same every week.

1:04:29

I don't know. It's kind of the same every year. It's

1:04:31

like, be better. Yeah, the before picture. It's always, I'm gonna wait,

1:04:33

you know? Touch

1:04:36

your New Year's resolution is to keep the

1:04:38

pictures going. God, I have such a

1:04:40

good one from earlier this year. I think I showed, did I

1:04:42

show it to you? It's

1:04:44

me, like, with my mustache. And

1:04:47

my gut's just fucking hanging out. I'm just

1:04:49

doing this one. Holding the camera like this,

1:04:51

just going... Just

1:04:56

fed up. Just fed up with gross...

1:04:59

How many years? Five? Since

1:05:02

before I moved here. Which was like five years ago, yeah.

1:05:04

We can get to ten. Man,

1:05:07

I want all of these framed.

1:05:10

Yeah, as soon as I get a good after photo. Might be a

1:05:12

while. You need to take enough of them that you can put them

1:05:14

under like a Rolodex and you just start spinning them. And

1:05:18

it's like, I took a picture of

1:05:20

myself every year. Yeah,

1:05:24

we can do that. We can do that. Good.

1:05:26

In my room. Okay. Good.

1:05:30

I'm glad. Still didn't answer the resolution.

1:05:32

No, the resolution. Yeah. The

1:05:38

honest answer is like rediscovering who

1:05:41

I am. I think that

1:05:43

it's easy to lose track of that

1:05:46

when you're focused on doing

1:05:48

things for other people all the time. Most

1:05:51

people in their day-to-day lives, they

1:05:53

work for other people. And

1:05:56

it can be all-consuming.

1:06:00

So rediscovering who you are, I like that a lot. That's

1:06:03

good. What if you don't like what you find? Well

1:06:06

then I'll just focus on other people again. And just

1:06:08

get through this. They got me

1:06:10

30 odd years into my life. You gotta be whoever you want

1:06:12

to be though. That's the beauty of

1:06:14

it. Fake it long

1:06:16

enough that... Don't fake it till you make it,

1:06:18

because then that means you'll go back. Fake

1:06:21

it till you become it. Someone

1:06:23

said something good about... It's not fake it till

1:06:25

you make it, but like... Do it till

1:06:27

you shoot it or something. Or fucking... That

1:06:30

just sounds like the same thing, but they want it

1:06:32

to be funny about it. Yeah. Write

1:06:36

it till you diet. Write it

1:06:38

till you diet. That's

1:06:42

what I say about the sausage. Write

1:06:44

it till I diet. It

1:06:48

does, because I'm eating so much sausage, I'm gaining weight, and

1:06:51

then I have to diet. I'm

1:06:55

unappreciated in my time. I

1:06:58

need to go back out on tour to the audience that will

1:07:00

laugh at my jokes, because they're

1:07:02

paying too. They're paying to laugh at

1:07:04

you. I always worry

1:07:06

about that, that when you're on stage in front

1:07:08

of people like that, that they're just laughing at

1:07:10

anything. Because they paid for it

1:07:12

and they think that... Oh, because they're just

1:07:14

there for a good time and they like you

1:07:17

already. So I'm like, that's fine, but also

1:07:19

hold me to a higher standard sometimes. Well,

1:07:21

that's just you not giving yourself enough credit for what

1:07:24

you're saying on stage and doing... I don't

1:07:26

remember anything that I say on stage. I'm in the moment. Are

1:07:29

you talking about your show or like either? I

1:07:33

can't remember any of it. Your show is

1:07:35

like... Clon. Clon.

1:07:39

God bless you. Thank you. I

1:07:43

don't remember like... Oh, I

1:07:45

got notes on me. Number eight. Your boy. Oh

1:07:49

yeah. Your boy. I

1:07:51

got JP over here. You

1:07:54

don't have anything quite for you, do you? No, I don't

1:07:57

have a tattoo for Ethan's tour. We

1:08:00

do have matching tattoos though. Hmm kind

1:08:03

of funny how that works. Yeah.

1:08:05

No, I definitely like Shawn a little bit better than I

1:08:07

like you No,

1:08:18

I couldn't actually jokingly I've hurt Ethan a lot

1:08:20

you know, I'm exclusively jokingly hurt Ethan There's a

1:08:22

lot of pain what I don't like is that

1:08:24

you call it a thank bitch for eight hours

1:08:26

straight. I Like

1:08:28

to think bitch think bitch was a good bit. I think a

1:08:31

lot of people like saying bitch Yeah, like

1:08:33

I said, I say the humor that I think Ethan

1:08:35

would react to. Mm-hmm. I like to think

1:08:37

but yeah Would you say it if

1:08:39

it hurt your feelings though? me Would

1:08:43

I call myself think bitches that we're asking? No, like if

1:08:45

would you call me on it? It's something that you would

1:08:47

oh No No,

1:08:51

I don't like that I don't

1:08:53

like the idea that I could have annoyed you

1:08:55

and you don't say anything about it. Oh Why

1:09:01

don't we talk about a few times where he's crossed the

1:09:04

line with you yeah save space I

1:09:09

Can't think of anything you haven't I

1:09:12

think I'm lying I Think

1:09:16

that you guys want to get off your chest right now. Oh a

1:09:19

mediator. Oh Shams

1:09:23

like gonna start. I think we're pretty good. No,

1:09:26

there was a moment earlier in

1:09:28

the the cast where You

1:09:31

had been like showing up late or like postponing episodes

1:09:33

or something and I was like worried your heart wasn't

1:09:35

in it Yeah, and I just said that to him

1:09:37

and we moved on. Yep. I

1:09:39

think that's the only thing that's happened But

1:09:42

you also had a lot going on during that time that

1:09:44

was like mid documentary it was made something else Everyone's

1:09:48

got a lot going on Yeah,

1:09:50

but you were you were like really overwhelmed at that

1:09:53

point Yeah, I think

1:09:55

it's still fair to be like well. You're not showing up on

1:09:57

time. I know I'm just saying that I'm not blaming you for

1:10:00

it as in like you actually didn't care. I

1:10:03

was aware that you had a lot going on. But

1:10:06

thanks. Oh, here we go. I

1:10:09

wish you would just look at me in the eye and go, thank you.

1:10:12

See, thank you. Close

1:10:17

enough. Close enough. What are you thanking him for

1:10:19

though? He just said something critical

1:10:21

and then walked you right out of it with his

1:10:23

own words. Just gaslit

1:10:26

you back into sitting over there. Uh,

1:10:31

no, I'm glad that we could talk openly

1:10:33

about that. Yeah. At that time.

1:10:36

I think it's important. I'm standing up for myself more this year. You

1:10:38

are? That's my thing. When's the last time

1:10:40

you set up for yourself? Like two weeks ago on a

1:10:42

thankless call. Nice. Oh yeah. Nice.

1:10:46

It's pretty cool. Feels good. I

1:10:49

should- Wanna get drunk on power? Shaun,

1:10:51

are you a fuck you? So

1:10:55

no lunch time. Nothing to eat.

1:10:57

Nothing to eat? Okay. You'll

1:11:00

learn. You're 27. I'm

1:11:02

34 soon. I

1:11:04

think it's hard to stand up for yourself because

1:11:07

my whole thing, my therapist is always like, you don't want

1:11:10

to come off as a dick. Yeah.

1:11:12

That's the thing that I struggle with a lot where

1:11:14

it's like, I don't want to come off as like

1:11:16

ungrateful or like an asshole

1:11:19

or whatever. Yeah, but you could just see your piece and then

1:11:21

go, but no worries if not. That's

1:11:23

how I respond to every text ever.

1:11:26

No worries if not. I almost put that

1:11:28

in because you made me text Jeff

1:11:30

to get a ticket for the Gabe Awards last night. And

1:11:33

I almost put in no worries if not as

1:11:35

a joke. I

1:11:37

would have put that. With Ethan, you

1:11:39

got to learn how to read or hear his

1:11:42

yeses. Cause you'll

1:11:44

always say yes. If

1:11:46

I ask you for something or to do something, you'll always say

1:11:48

yes. It's a body language thing. If he doesn't want to do

1:11:50

it, he'll go. If he says yeah. Or

1:11:54

if he says yes. I just

1:11:57

start convulsing. So no. Yeah,

1:12:02

you've gotten pretty good at reading my yeses, but

1:12:04

you're correct. I will just say yes. This

1:12:08

is good. I like this. I don't think that we should

1:12:10

– I don't think that you say yes to everything,

1:12:13

but I think that you're a very generous person, and

1:12:15

you'd want to help people. You want to help everyone. I

1:12:18

don't think it's a fear of disappointing people. I

1:12:20

think you are reaching your limit, though. Yeah,

1:12:22

I think that a lot of it is a fear

1:12:24

of disappointing people, though. I don't

1:12:27

like disappointing people. But

1:12:29

you also like helping people. I

1:12:31

like helping people. I think that's

1:12:34

overriding your

1:12:36

desire to not disappoint people. How

1:12:38

do I disappoint people more? Say

1:12:40

no. You've

1:12:44

got to condense your circles.

1:12:47

Have you agreed to do something in the next week or two

1:12:49

that you don't want to do that's coming

1:12:51

up? This is probably part of

1:12:53

the problem, too, where you can't remember. I can't

1:12:55

literally just like can't remember. I

1:12:59

don't think so, but I probably will.

1:13:02

Probably will. I want you to call somebody and cancel a plan.

1:13:05

Oh, man. That sucks. I

1:13:07

want you to make an appointment somewhere just so

1:13:09

you have an excuse to call and expose

1:13:12

your therapy. My therapist did that

1:13:14

with me a

1:13:16

couple of years ago. This was like right before COVID.

1:13:18

She was like, for – until I

1:13:20

see you next, we see each other every week. She

1:13:24

was like, you can't do anything for anybody. She

1:13:26

was like, if anybody asks you for anything, you

1:13:28

have to say no. Even

1:13:30

my paycheck's late. Sorry. Sorry. Can't

1:13:32

do it. I'm

1:13:35

no man this week. But even

1:13:37

she was like, if you're going to the grocery

1:13:39

store and your roommate asks you to get something,

1:13:41

you say no. It

1:13:43

was awful. Did you do it? Yep.

1:13:46

It sucked. There was

1:13:48

a few times where I let it slip. And

1:13:50

I said yes. Relapsed.

1:13:52

Yes, I can't ask for anything. He

1:13:55

offered me $500 to help him pack up his house

1:13:57

and move. I don't like that. segment

1:14:00

has turned into us attacking

1:14:02

Ethan for the way he

1:14:04

is clearly making him uncomfortable. Wait no

1:14:06

no no that's not... it

1:14:08

is. I want you to feel bad.

1:14:11

Attack me! I don't think that's

1:14:13

not an attack. I do this

1:14:15

a lot with Ethan because I

1:14:18

think that he gives too much of himself to other

1:14:20

people and I mean it feeds into like

1:14:22

rediscovering who you are and doing what makes you happy.

1:14:25

I think that's why I sympathize with it a lot because at

1:14:28

27 I was the exact same way. I

1:14:30

was on tour almost when

1:14:33

I was doing non-stop things for other people. You

1:14:36

learn. You get sick of it after all. Well

1:14:40

it's like you say no a few times and you

1:14:42

cancel a few things and it's like oh people didn't

1:14:45

get mad at me and I didn't disappoint anybody. Yeah.

1:14:48

What you were saying before of like what do you do

1:14:50

for fun and not

1:14:53

just like a thing that like what do you do actually

1:14:55

for fun. I have no idea. I don't do anything for

1:14:57

fun. I think the one thing that you do for fun

1:14:59

you're not allowed to talk about for some reason. Yeah.

1:15:03

Which I don't know why I feel that way. Don't let

1:15:06

him pressure you into talking about it if you don't want

1:15:08

to talk about it. It's a fear of judgment I feel.

1:15:10

Can we talk about it? Yeah why not?

1:15:13

No. No! That was a test! Oh

1:15:15

my god! Joffelyn

1:15:20

did this with me the other

1:15:22

day. Because. And clearly you're not learning.

1:15:24

Because somebody in my life wanted to have a

1:15:27

conversation with me that I didn't want to have

1:15:29

and you were like you kept

1:15:31

coming up to me going Ethan can we talk and I'll

1:15:33

go yeah what's up and you'd go no

1:15:35

you're supposed to say no but it was hard with

1:15:37

you though because I thought that you actually had something

1:15:39

that you wanted to talk about. Yeah

1:15:41

you can't do it with the people you're closest to. Tough.

1:15:44

It's tough. Yeah but I think

1:15:46

you're a great person. Thanks. I think you guys

1:15:48

are all great people. I think you're overwhelming yourself

1:15:50

a lot and it's hard to see sometimes and

1:15:53

I see a lot of myself in you. But

1:15:57

I'd like to see a little more of myself in you. Ahem.

1:16:01

That means a lot. I think that's why I give a lot

1:16:03

of advice, but you don't always have to take it. Fuck,

1:16:07

just touch my ear. It was

1:16:10

Esmeralda. Esmeralda. Renesme!

1:16:12

No, that's not what it was.

1:16:15

Yeah, what was her name? What did I say it was? Mel.

1:16:17

No, you're not gonna say it. Emmelda. I

1:16:19

thought it was Esmeralda. Emmelda!

1:16:23

What do you do for fun? What do I do

1:16:25

for fun? Yeah, just put all that part out and cut to

1:16:28

this fucking bullshit that he's looking at. Fuck,

1:16:30

dude. I

1:16:32

watch Marvel movies. I like

1:16:35

to play pickleball. I like golfing.

1:16:37

I like watching my Miami Dolphins

1:16:39

lose constantly. No, they're good. You

1:16:42

don't even know what football is. You think it's a round ball. Yeah,

1:16:44

but I know people make fun of you for wearing the hat.

1:16:47

No one makes fun of me for wearing... Are

1:16:49

people talking about the hat? I

1:16:52

remember when you met another Dolphins fan once, and

1:16:54

you were like, there are dozens of us. I

1:16:56

found the Dolphins bar. It's

1:16:59

called... The

1:17:01

Snug. The Snug. It's in Burbank.

1:17:03

It holds about 40 people, which

1:17:05

is the entire fucking community of

1:17:07

Dolphins fans. Never full. Are the

1:17:09

Dolphins good? I actually don't know.

1:17:11

They're very good. They're very good.

1:17:13

Yeah, Miami. Miami,

1:17:16

yeah, the Miami Dolphins football team. I

1:17:18

should have worn my jersey today. God, they could use the

1:17:20

promotion, I think. Are they going all the way?

1:17:22

Super Bowl? Some people think so. I also

1:17:25

think so. But

1:17:27

I'm not confident. But

1:17:30

listen, they've been letting me down for my entire life. Aren't they the

1:17:32

top of the... The leaderboard?

1:17:34

The NFC? No. AMC?

1:17:38

NFL. The AFC. What

1:17:42

does that stand for? The American

1:17:44

Football Club. Why did they

1:17:46

have two different things? I know less about football

1:17:48

than I let on. Why don't they just go

1:17:50

east side, west side? Yeah, Justin. They don't have

1:17:52

the same ring to it, I don't think. Come

1:17:54

on. East side football. No, make up an opinion.

1:17:57

Yeah, well, they don't podcast. You can say whatever you want.

1:17:59

They actually used to. It could

1:18:01

be the WFC and the EFC. Yeah,

1:18:04

no they used to, but then it became...

1:18:06

Yeah, but the WFC is the Wildlife Championship

1:18:08

where they make animals wrestle. That'd be sick.

1:18:12

Well, actually it would be a little sad. Gangs,

1:18:16

that's why. Mmm. Back

1:18:19

in the 90s when... That makes sense. Hip-hop culture was really

1:18:21

coming up and there was the East Coast vs. West Coast

1:18:23

rivalry. The NFL was forced

1:18:26

to change the name. Oh,

1:18:28

interesting. That makes sense actually. Yeah,

1:18:30

it does. Did you just make that up? Yeah.

1:18:34

Did you actually...? Yeah.

1:18:42

No, I didn't make that up. How could I make that up? Yeah,

1:18:45

to the top of the former EFC. And

1:18:48

no, yeah, EFC, which is

1:18:50

the East Coast... Football.

1:18:55

Who's the best football team?

1:18:58

The Miami Dolphins. The Miami Dolphins. No,

1:19:01

I... Well, so... Like

1:19:03

the generic, like, in England people

1:19:05

will always be like, Oh, Miami Dolphins is the best, Liverpool

1:19:08

is the best. I mean it changes. It used to be

1:19:10

the fucking Patriots... I don't

1:19:12

know. Dude, I don't know. The Patriots,

1:19:14

when it was like Tom Brady and Bill Belichick. That's

1:19:16

what I was thinking of. Now it's like Kansas City

1:19:18

probably because of Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey. They

1:19:21

are actually a very good... Yeah, yeah, here's Ethan's big

1:19:23

theory. I have a rumor. Not a rumor. Not

1:19:26

a rumor. I'm a conspiracy theory. So she's trying to get them

1:19:28

into the Super Bowl? She's going to perform? No,

1:19:31

she's not going to perform. But I

1:19:33

think that the games are going more

1:19:35

in the Chiefs' favor because they know

1:19:37

that if the Chiefs get into the

1:19:39

Super Bowl, whether or not they win, if the Chiefs

1:19:41

get into the Super Bowl, it's going

1:19:43

to have a record-breaking amount of viewers

1:19:46

because of the relationship between Travis Kelsey

1:19:48

and the other two. I

1:19:50

don't think Swifties

1:19:52

are going to go to a football

1:19:54

game. It's been

1:19:57

crazy on the Internet, though. I think that

1:19:59

the V- viewership would go up. Oh, viewership

1:20:01

for sure. Regardless, the Super Bowl is gonna

1:20:03

sell out. For that one chance to see

1:20:05

Taylor in the booth going, yeah!

1:20:07

Yeah, doing a secret handshake with Travis

1:20:09

Kelsey's mother, being like, she's just like

1:20:11

us. No, that's what I mean

1:20:13

though. Viewership

1:20:16

across the board, I think, will be... That

1:20:18

or Love is actually real and he's just playing

1:20:21

better because he's in a committed relationship. And

1:20:24

the whole team are inspired by him. Here's what

1:20:26

I'm afraid of. Love? Oh yeah.

1:20:31

That the Miami Dolphins beat the Kansas

1:20:34

City Chiefs in the AFC Championship. Oh.

1:20:36

And then everyone starts to hate the

1:20:38

Miami Dolphins even more. That's a scary

1:20:40

thought. That is scary. That's

1:20:43

not that scary. Well,

1:20:45

I mean, just culturally how significant a

1:20:47

community can like rally against something and

1:20:49

completely destroy it. Yeah, and especially because

1:20:52

we're having so much fun out there.

1:20:54

Why do you like Miami Dolphins so

1:20:56

much? You're Canadian. Well, we didn't have

1:20:58

a team in the NFL. We had the

1:21:01

Canadian Football League, which was mostly teams named the Rough

1:21:03

Riders. But why

1:21:05

Miami? Ace Ventura, pet detective. Finkle

1:21:10

design horn. Yeah. Whoa. Can't watch that

1:21:12

movie anymore. Yeah, you can. What's

1:21:14

wrong with it? Should

1:21:17

we wrap this one up? I

1:21:25

think we can. Have we started? We

1:21:28

talked about football. You talk about this little amount

1:21:30

of things all the

1:21:33

time? Yeah. I feel like we didn't talk about

1:21:35

anything. Yeah, we did. We talked about... Let's

1:21:37

recap. Yeah, we did. Our feelings. You

1:21:40

guys cornered me for a bit. I

1:21:42

want you to know that always comes from a good

1:21:44

place. And no one doesn't. I

1:21:49

mean, Cornered Rat will go for the throat. I

1:21:51

know. I know. And he is from the year of

1:21:53

the rat. I am. We learned that I'm from the

1:21:55

year of the rat. I'm the horse. What

1:21:57

are you? What are you, a fucking pig?

1:22:00

pig or something. I

1:22:03

don't know why I said it. I

1:22:05

don't know why I said it. I'm

1:22:08

wonderful having you on the podcast. I

1:22:10

don't even know why I said it. I saw

1:22:12

all of the joy drain out of your face.

1:22:15

Probably a fucking snake. What's it going to be? 1989,

1:22:19

Josslyn, what year is it? Pull it up,

1:22:21

Joss. Snake. I'm

1:22:25

going to fucking bite your ankles. You need

1:22:27

to watch over him. I'm going

1:22:29

to put a rat in the corner, snake in the

1:22:31

grass. Horse just trying to eat shit. Horse just staring

1:22:33

at his cock being like, fuck yeah. Hey,

1:22:37

we started talking about Sean's hog. Let's

1:22:39

wrap it up talking about Sean's massive

1:22:42

hog. Oh, jacksepticec cock. Year

1:22:45

of the hog. Love

1:22:47

that. Told you,

1:22:49

pig. I just want

1:22:51

that to trend. Jacksepticeye has a

1:22:53

huge cock. Jacksepticec

1:22:56

cock. J-Cog. Jacksepticec

1:22:59

hog. I like that

1:23:01

hog. Jackhoggis.

1:23:06

Jackhoggis. Is it going to change your name

1:23:08

back to Sean McLaughlin on YouTube? No. Why

1:23:12

not? Because

1:23:14

branding is fucking on point. SEO

1:23:16

is developing strong. What does

1:23:18

SEO mean? Search engine

1:23:20

optimization. It says for Sony Entertainment

1:23:23

Online. You don't think people would be able

1:23:25

to find you using your real name? No, we want Jacksepticeye. Thanks

1:23:29

for tuning in, everybody. Really glad to have Justin on.

1:23:32

Hopefully it was actually exciting to watch. Maybe you can see why we're

1:23:34

friends with him, or maybe we won't be friends with him anymore,

1:23:36

depending on how the internet reacts to how he was. I

1:23:39

don't want to even joke about that. You

1:23:43

opened yourself up to our communities. Now

1:23:45

they will decide your fate. Judgment

1:23:48

is swift. Just like

1:23:50

Taylor. It'll be

1:23:52

like Survivor. Life is long. The tribe has

1:23:54

spoken. Right now isn't

1:23:56

forever. Your

1:23:59

circumstances don't work. don't define you, things

1:24:03

can change. They

1:24:05

can definitely get worse.