0:00

Lighties, gents,

0:03

nonbindes, they

0:08

thems y'alls.

0:13

I have a cold. Guess who's that laugh

0:16

is? Who's laughing? I'm here

0:18

in the Stude with none

0:20

other than my good friend

0:29

and close confidant.

0:35

Wow, you're good at those.

0:42

Natatlogo.

0:47

Thank you?

0:48

Does this feel like doing morning radio?

0:50

It's much better than that.

0:52

Thank you. I appreciate it. I'll

0:54

take that.

0:56

Thanks, Chelsea. It's great to be here. I'll

0:58

try to forget that. Yesterday you asked my husband

1:01

and he said no, Well he does have

1:03

a book. I had a full twenty four hours

1:05

to ask a bunch of people, but I'm glad to step in.

1:07

I didn't ask anyone else. Really, No,

1:09

to be fair, and also, it

1:12

really isn't as status oriented

1:14

as you might be thinking. Doors

1:17

open.

1:19

I only had to beg you to bring this podcast

1:22

back for about two years.

1:24

And now look where it got you. Now I'm

1:26

here into the coveted studio.

1:30

Here the first actual

1:33

friend that I've had on the podcast. That's

1:35

rude,

1:38

Natasha notorious as

1:41

of late.

1:43

Four Chelsea

1:55

taking her shirt off at the Emperor.

2:00

Oh man, I thought you're gonna start talking about my book.

2:06

What a book? Though? Actually, this book,

2:09

let's talk about it. The

2:12

world deserves my children. This is actually

2:14

great for the topic of the

2:16

show today, which honestly I was laughing in

2:18

the shower one second ago. When

2:21

I was in the shower and late, I

2:23

was thinking, you know, no matter what topic

2:26

we decided, always veers off in a

2:28

different direction. But

2:30

we were talking about doing life hacks

2:34

and household solutions. Also,

2:38

maybe a little parenting will sneak its way

2:40

in. You never know, I get so

2:42

anxious of certain areas like

2:45

you and me giving parenting me. I'm like, don't undersell

2:47

us. We have a lot more to say, you.

2:49

Know, you feel like that's beneath us

2:52

kind of a little bit. But there's

2:54

so much labor involved that

2:56

I'm sure everyone's struggling. Like

3:01

today I was. I realized, what I'm doing this week

3:03

is just watering the dishes, Like

3:06

I have them all and I just keep every day

3:08

coming to like ten to them,

3:12

but I don't want to do them.

3:13

Yeah, but you do have to water the dishes

3:16

if the kongeal has already

3:18

said.

3:18

It exactly, So I put a little hot water,

3:20

a little more of that soap, and maybe

3:23

one day my husband will put them because I like

3:25

to do everything around the dishes because I know

3:27

he can load the dishwasher, but like no one

3:29

else can clean

3:31

the surfaces or pick

3:34

up all the kids crap.

3:36

You know.

3:38

See, this is what I'm scared of. Just okay,

3:42

so anyway, we're gonna talk about life hacks.

3:44

Scared.

3:45

I was thinking about something about toilet's

3:47

a hack that I have, but it's so gross that the whole

3:49

time you were talking, I was like, is that too gross

3:51

to share? And then

3:53

I decided, yeah, I

3:56

lost my coaster. So this is one of

3:58

our first hacks is out of the bag. It's we're

4:00

using paper for coasters.

4:03

Okay, So basically life

4:05

hacks are like you know, I feel like that is

4:08

a genre of the Internet. And

4:10

the thing is a lot of times I see a video

4:12

with the life pack, I'm like, oh, that's cool, and

4:14

then I still never do it. Like there's one

4:16

with putting your necklace on or embrace

4:19

it where you put it through

4:21

a safety pin to hold the one side

4:24

hmmm or something. But see that's

4:26

what happens. I kind of forget the hack and then it's

4:28

like where do you go to find it again? And

4:31

then I used to follow this account that was called

4:33

life hacks, and then it just started being like ads

4:35

for plastic items all the time,

4:37

and I was just like.

4:39

I feel like life hacks are kind of for like men

4:42

who need to make everything fun. Like

4:45

Mosha's always into life hacks,

4:47

but they are like more complicated. Like

4:49

he can't just like cut a piece of fruit. He's

4:51

like, I gotta find this video of how to cut

4:54

the melon, and then he tries it and it's

4:56

dangerous and it doesn't really work, but

4:58

he's like all into it because it makes it

5:01

thrilling for him.

5:02

Men do love new fangled items.

5:04

I think they you know, progress, that's

5:06

what they're known for. Right, so

5:10

far, all this has to go on the cutting room floor. We

5:13

can use a new start. We'll

5:16

keep your intro and we'll cut everything else.

5:18

That makes me feel bad that you think that we need to

5:20

cut everything.

5:22

No, it's more about it's more reflective of

5:24

my own self hate. Also, I'm

5:26

trying to get a pulitzer for

5:29

opening up the DDT at

5:31

Catalina Island topic.

5:35

We're trying to get some scientists to weigh

5:37

in there. They're not receptive,

5:40

But what's the DDT.

5:43

It's like a deadly chemical that's buried

5:45

in barrels all around Catalina Island.

5:49

That would be cool if you could make

5:51

a difference.

5:55

Okay, here we go. Wow

6:00

your name. We're

6:02

looking for life hacks, household

6:04

tips, and whatever weird

6:07

shift of topic that you bring into the table.

6:11

Cool, cool, household tips?

6:13

Got any?

6:16

Oh man?

6:16

What are your plants?

6:19

Don't don't let them die?

6:21

I hung up, Chelsea,

6:27

Hello, and good afternoon to

6:30

yo. We're looking for household

6:32

tips, life hacks. How do you get through the day?

6:34

How do you maintain your household? Is there a

6:37

secret to surviving adulthood?

6:39

How do you create order out of chaos?

6:42

How do I create order out of chaos?

6:45

Oh?

6:45

My god, I feel like my life is just chaos all

6:47

the time.

6:48

Yeah,

6:51

Natasha's here, Natasha ro Hi.

6:56

Hi.

6:56

Oh, it's so nice to meet

6:58

you. So nice to finally make

7:01

it to the to the to

7:03

the calls. I feel like I've tried so

7:06

many times and I don't know, I

7:08

haven't been lucky so far.

7:10

Okay, chaos.

7:11

What type of chaos are we talking about? Like as

7:14

life chaos?

7:15

I think she's more talking about like laundry everywhere.

7:19

Honestly, I'm writing a caption right now, I'm

7:22

writing a caption for Instagram. Did

7:25

you know Natasha took her shirt off at the

7:27

Improv?

7:29

Yeah?

7:29

I heard about that.

7:31

Congrats, thank you.

7:32

It was it was actually really easy.

7:38

It was so easy.

7:40

This girl who has a podcast, she came up

7:42

to me afterwards and she was like, that's

7:46

so cool. You did that. I do it every every

7:48

live showing of our podcast. And I

7:50

was like, cool, Yeah.

7:52

She takes her shirt off every live showing.

7:54

Yeah, right, who was that?

7:56

You're the only woman who's ever taken her shirt

7:58

off?

7:59

No, I think took her shirt off. It was

8:01

you know Bert Kreischer. He takes his shirt off every

8:03

single show, and so it was my second

8:06

time having to follow him that night, and I thought

8:08

it would be funny. I didn't think

8:10

through.

8:10

The night A show

8:12

night at the Improv.

8:13

Well, you know, if I'm gonna hire a babysitter,

8:16

make the truck out there, why not do two

8:19

shows?

8:19

Wow?

8:20

Ambitious?

8:22

How did it feel after? I'm curious,

8:24

like, was it like exhilarating?

8:27

Was it like?

8:28

Wow? Are you a journalist?

8:32

I'm curious. I mean I've never tried

8:34

it. I mean I don't know.

8:36

Well, listen, I have. I

8:39

have small boobs, but I know that

8:42

they're you know, pretty nice, like they.

8:44

Would so you wouldn't have done the no

8:47

no interesting That kind

8:49

of scales down your bravery well.

8:54

I will tell you I I purposefully

8:56

did it also because when I had the idea

8:59

in between the show, I looked down at my outfit

9:01

and I was like, Okay, I'm wearing overalls.

9:04

This is going to cover. If

9:06

I take down the top part, you still

9:09

won't see my perio menopause patch

9:11

that I was wearing. So you know, I was

9:13

like, it's just my tits,

9:15

not my stomach. You know, I knew

9:17

it was Listen.

9:18

I actually refrained from commenting,

9:21

like personally to you, like

9:23

I wanted to almost be like, your tits

9:25

look great, but then I was like, you know what that is beside

9:27

the point. That is like missing

9:30

the message, because I truly was

9:32

actually moved to tears by

9:35

you doing that. I really was. I really

9:37

was because comedy clubs are

9:39

such male spaces, and they really

9:42

really are. And I know that sounds like an annoying

9:44

like what I don't know what generation to reference.

9:46

I'm really trying to memorize my generations because

9:48

I know how important it is to classify people

9:50

nowadays, but it really

9:53

is. And it's like I just feel like,

9:55

you know, for me, like all the when

9:57

I was starting stand up and all these guys, we're like, you

9:59

gotta do eight shows a night and blah blah. It's

10:01

like, would you do it if it was the

10:03

lineup was all women and you would

10:05

you be so amped to go do these shows

10:07

every night? Or whatever?

10:09

Well, Also, when I did that, the improv called

10:11

me the next day and they were like, if you have video of that,

10:13

you can't post it.

10:14

And I said, okay, daddy. I

10:17

was like.

10:17

Why and they're like, we could get our liquor

10:20

license taken away and you

10:22

can't ever do that again. And I said, well Bert does it

10:24

every night and they were

10:26

just like silent. And

10:29

then when it.

10:29

Got oh that reminds me of something.

10:31

Posted, I reposted it.

10:33

It's true.

10:38

I mean, they're probably right, right, Like, isn't

10:40

that the whole freeze the nipple movement.

10:41

It's like it's a feminist talking too, sorry

10:44

illegal right.

10:45

And that's the weird thing too on Instagram, like if

10:47

you were to post a classy nude

10:49

selfie, wouldn't they ban it? But then there's like

10:51

porn people on there is is there

10:54

something like that?

10:55

I don't know, people are gonna be like classy?

10:57

What's classy? You don't think

10:59

porn people are classy? I take it

11:01

back.

11:06

Yeah, did it feel exhilarating?

11:07

Not really.

11:08

I was actually kind of regretting it because as

11:10

soon as I went on stage, I saw like, oh my

11:12

god, there's just all these shlubs in the front row

11:14

and then they immediately everyone pulled out their

11:16

cameras and oh god, what did

11:18

I do?

11:19

Yeah, that's the dark side of

11:21

the bit.

11:22

I hadn't really thought of that part, dark

11:24

side of the poon. Yeah, but you know, it

11:26

was fun. It was it was cool.

11:28

What if you saw someone that you recognized out

11:30

there that you were like in a fight with that

11:32

that would be the worst. Like some mom

11:35

that you had an argument with at school and

11:37

you look out and see her.

11:39

Yeah, I uh,

11:41

that would have sucked.

11:42

Isn't it weird too that like now you're a representative

11:45

of your family, like if you were in

11:47

your twenties and you did that bit, like at least

11:49

like you know, I'm

11:54

no, because it happened to me.

11:56

The very next day I went

11:58

to volunteer at my kids school, and

12:01

they didn't let me in the classroom.

12:02

Or like you miss. They had me.

12:05

They had me go cut paper in the

12:07

paper cutting room and then they would you.

12:09

Wear a little mask and the hat, and

12:11

then.

12:11

There were all these like young ta's coming

12:13

in and I was like, there's no way none of them

12:16

like saw this.

12:17

They're cutting paper furiously beside

12:20

you.

12:21

But you know, I whatever, they

12:23

made me, and I don't think that's why they made me do it, but I

12:26

yeah, I definitely don't want my daughter to

12:28

hear that.

12:29

I guess I think it's cool for your daughter

12:31

or whatever. Yeah, it probably better when she's

12:33

older, but whatever, you could explain it,

12:35

right, I mean, this is the thing

12:37

you can just go. Isn't it dumb that men's

12:40

chests are considered non

12:42

sexual and women's are considered sexual. Isn't

12:44

that stupid?

12:45

Well, I don't think she knows what sexual means.

12:47

She should, I'm just kidding.

12:49

No.

12:49

This is the thing where I like a lot of stuff with kids,

12:51

Like I'm just like, I like kind

12:54

of time out really quickly where I'm like, oh,

12:56

like you know, like they asked how babies

12:58

are made. It's like, well, I

13:00

mean the answer that I gave to my son, and I

13:03

go, well, you know how animals

13:05

mate and then they have kids, Well, humans mate and they.

13:07

Have kids, and oh that's smart.

13:09

Yeah, and he was just like oh cool, Like he didn't

13:11

ask any further questions because he doesn't know

13:13

enough to ask further questions.

13:15

No, my daughter legitimately thinks that you

13:17

make babies in a lab in Culver

13:20

City because like she knows

13:22

that like I froze my eggs and then

13:24

we unfroze them, like so she thinks

13:26

like eggs come together and

13:28

hatch or I don't know what, but definitely she

13:30

doesn't know about the penis.

13:32

Yeah. I mean a friend who

13:35

like showed her kids

13:38

like birth video

13:41

to some kids

13:43

and I was kind of like, oh yeah, I guess

13:45

like why not, you know.

13:47

I mean, we're going to have to tell them at some point.

13:50

So this is what I'm learning is the downside of

13:52

podcasting with a friend. It just goes intimate

13:55

fast. Okay, right, no, because

13:57

like I am constantly trying

13:59

to figure out the dance of

14:02

how to be conspiratorial. Wait,

14:04

I have to hang up on this college. This is too much.

14:08

This is like all right, this

14:11

is this has been really fun.

14:12

Okay, great, bye,

14:16

God Helloatasha.

14:22

Yeah, hey, hey,

14:25

I've been the biggest sting of both of you for

14:27

like over a decade.

14:28

Oh keep that down to five

14:31

years. Just kidding, over

14:33

three decades. No, we're

14:36

really Our whole friendship is taking on some

14:39

ab fab overtures. And guess

14:41

what I'm here? Aren't?

14:46

Who's Patty Paty?

14:49

I think that I would be the more the

14:53

pretty one, Yeah, yeah, enabler,

14:56

like trying to convince you to have

14:58

a drink or smoke a cigarette.

14:59

Like watching Natasha dance around the

15:01

pretty one, like she's like the one

15:03

who likes to eat crackers.

15:06

They're both the same. Actually,

15:09

the blonde one's older.

15:10

She's hot though, She's like, yeah,

15:12

but anyway, sir, can

15:14

I call you?

15:15

Sir?

15:16

Yeah? Please?

15:17

What are you calling for? Do you have a

15:20

life hack of any kind?

15:22

You know? I'm really calling because my husband

15:24

got like weeks ago and I have been

15:26

trying for hours to get out of them.

15:28

He literally got through his first time.

15:30

So what did we do? You

15:32

remember what we talked about?

15:34

Yeah, okay, yeah, it was with Tim Heideker

15:36

and you were talking about a pizza

15:38

with butternuts squash on it for Thanksgiving.

15:43

I'm sorry that we went so intimate.

15:45

I know, I see this is the bar and

15:47

Natasha, Yeah,

15:50

I'm so proud of the work that we do here on

15:53

the podcast Butternut Squash,

15:55

Pizza Revelatory.

15:57

Okay, yeah, So where

15:59

are you based?

16:01

Upstate New York? Do you know the Catskills?

16:04

I do?

16:05

Gorgeous That's where I first fell in love with nature,

16:07

really really well. I just thought

16:09

it was like so craggy and beautiful,

16:12

and I had it is beautiful.

16:14

It's like the mix of beauty and you

16:16

know, decrepit stuff.

16:18

Right.

16:19

Have you ever been to Fleischmann's of

16:21

course?

16:22

Yeah.

16:23

It's it's

16:25

Chelsea's acting like she's taking intense notes,

16:28

but she's just drawing hearts like kind of

16:30

like in sixth grade when you did that.

16:31

I can't It's like a compulsive thing that

16:33

I can't stop doing. It

16:37

is Fleischman's, right, Yeah, Like I went there is

16:40

really tiny, yeah, and it's like they

16:42

had an auction and I had

16:44

never been done that before, but it would be like

16:47

you would actually love this, so like I remember

16:49

we bought like a little wooden

16:51

stool and it was super cute, like

16:54

and then they would have like boxes of

16:57

random things that you could bid on.

17:00

I love that. It's like an antique place.

17:02

I don't know what it was. It's some kind of auction house

17:04

or something.

17:05

Did you know what was in the boxes or

17:08

so?

17:08

It's kind of like a mystery box of I

17:10

guess like different. I

17:12

can't remember if there was a category even.

17:15

It was just like a box of random shit and you

17:17

could bid on it. But let me tell you if

17:19

you've never been to an auction, I've never

17:21

been since either. But it was just really

17:23

exhilarating and like, especially when it

17:25

was low stakes, like not like it's not like, yeah,

17:29

a box of yes hair hair hair, I

17:32

got twenty five on it. You know, it's like, so

17:36

I highly recommend it. Kind

17:40

all right, are.

17:41

You and your husband? I'm

17:44

sorry, what were you saying?

17:45

Well, I don't want to cut you intimidating?

17:48

I know, No, she's not.

17:50

It's just like the crosstalk is a

17:52

popular.

17:53

It's hard topic on this, I know.

17:56

I just I read a review of my podcast.

17:58

It says I talk over people a lot

18:00

and then it's annoying, and so now I'm like, I

18:02

do do that. I think it's familial like

18:05

my upbringing is of course. Yeah,

18:07

so it's hard. I'm trying not to.

18:09

Well, it's just also the nature of phone, the

18:12

phone.

18:12

Yeah, you know, and communication in

18:14

general.

18:16

Absolutely, Natasha. I was

18:18

literally just on the treadmill watching

18:20

and the Honeymoon on YouTube.

18:22

Oh you watch it on YouTube? That's good to know.

18:24

Yeah, I do, because like,

18:26

I can't listen to music

18:28

on the treadmill. I need to be like visually

18:31

looking at something to not look at the number

18:33

of the distance.

18:34

So isn't it kind of boring though watching a podcast

18:36

like there's no special stuff

18:38

that's happening.

18:39

Honestly, it makes the time go really

18:41

quick. Okay, which is my main

18:44

concern.

18:44

Were my dogs in it?

18:46

No, not this one. It was the guy random episode

18:49

a few weeks ago.

18:49

Okay, I love him.

18:52

Maybe one thing you could do to become

18:54

smarter while you're on the treadmill is just look at a

18:56

slideshow of like art and

18:59

it says the artists they should

19:01

make that for workouts.

19:03

Oh yeah, I'm Richmond and I

19:05

used to love art history. That would be really

19:07

good.

19:08

Yeah. Like, so you're on the treadmill and it's just okay,

19:11

it says like Van go and then it just brings

19:13

up like like a hundred

19:15

vanges. You're like, okay, I get the sense of what his style,

19:18

and then a slide comes up and it's like known for and

19:21

then it brings up another artist and or

19:24

actually I mean also just even

19:26

history, like imagine learning history that way.

19:28

Yeah, I think you should delete this from the podcast

19:30

and actually do that.

19:32

I just think I should delete this whole podcast.

19:36

This podcast.

19:39

Listen this

19:47

podcast, listen,

19:54

listen aside.

20:04

Listen.

20:06

So far do you Selsea?

20:09

Yeah?

20:13

I do. I mean the Tim Hideker one I

20:15

very much was like, this is a mess, and then

20:17

I listened to I was like, this is my favorite episode,

20:20

so don't trust the voices in my head.

20:22

Okay, but this one is

20:24

bad. I do think that IQ's are dropping,

20:26

and I don't think people would

20:28

be into enrichment in that sort of.

20:31

It will listen. It would be a cottage industry,

20:34

it'd be Yeah, it would be a cottage industry to begin

20:37

with, because who really wants to get smarter where

20:39

they're while they're working out? Very few

20:41

people, I do.

20:42

Yeah, I feel

20:45

like you could definitely market it to like Silicon

20:47

Valley bros.

20:48

Oh Man, this is a definite bad idea.

20:52

I don't want to be a part of this business. Wait,

20:55

so you're married. How long have you been married?

20:58

Oh?

20:59

Gosh, eight

21:01

year? Nine years this year?

21:03

Okay? Well, oh,

21:05

First of all, hold on.

21:12

Congrats, that's a long time.

21:14

Major congrats. Yeah.

21:17

Second of ask him how he keeps

21:19

his house.

21:19

This is what I'm going to do. You're right

21:21

on the money. I'm going to ask how do

21:24

you and your husband divide up

21:26

household work? Household?

21:28

Well, the beauty of a gay relationship

21:30

is it's very egalitarian

21:33

really for the most part.

21:37

And do you do you think both of you are kind

21:39

of aesthetic in nature? Because I'm realizing that's

21:41

one of my main issues is my

21:43

surroundings are so important to me

21:45

and my husband.

21:47

The leading question,

21:49

your honor. Do you

21:51

think you're both aesthetic in nature?

21:54

You and your husband?

21:55

I'm more aesthetic. I'm definitely more aesthetic.

21:58

But he appreciates the aesthetic and it's

22:00

probably the better cleaner, so it

22:02

mesh aes well.

22:03

Okay, so there is some division of labor.

22:06

Yeah, Like, you know, he takes out

22:08

the trash and you hang pea does

22:10

the cat letter. I do kind of

22:13

the things I want.

22:13

To do do you know that? I went

22:16

to a trainer in New York courtesy

22:18

of Yaminika Sounder's comedian

22:21

extraordinaire, and she trained

22:23

her cat to shit in the toilet and

22:26

the toilet and she showed me a

22:28

video. I could not believe it. I'm also kind

22:30

of like, I don't know if I

22:32

want my cat sharing a toilet with

22:34

me, I'd need a separate bathroom for the

22:36

cat.

22:37

That is really wild.

22:39

And she could the cat also pee

22:41

in the toilet.

22:42

Yes, there was a video of the cat taking a piss

22:44

and the sound of like when a human

22:46

man pisses in a toilet.

22:48

You know they're getting it on the rim.

22:51

Or just like yeah, I don't know, but cat

22:53

litter is disgusting, so it's got to be

22:55

compelling.

22:56

And also doesn't it give you cancer or something like when.

22:58

You yes, it gives you it's like

23:01

a brain bacteria that makes

23:03

you love the cats more. That's

23:06

what I understand.

23:07

Well, it ain't going to be their personalities.

23:09

Let's be honest.

23:13

Cats are better than girl cats personality

23:15

wise.

23:16

And I did put a picture.

23:17

For girls and all other species.

23:19

Okay, I have to.

23:21

Say though, let me ask you this during the pandemic.

23:24

Did your husband do anything that was so

23:26

gross that you can't get over because

23:29

that's kind of what happened to me because we were like

23:31

in such tight quarters and no one was

23:33

leaving. I can't ever

23:36

not think about some of these things that I saw.

23:40

You know, I think it's just different

23:42

with two guys. Maybe

23:46

you know we've seen it all

23:48

pretty much right.

23:50

All right, But I guess it sounds

23:52

like you're both sort of neat.

23:55

I would say we're both. I was not neat

23:57

when we first Matt, he's

24:00

kind of shaped me.

24:01

We're talking to me,

24:04

that's the problem.

24:04

Motion I were in our couple's therapy the other

24:06

day on Zoom and he was telling

24:08

the couples therapist how he's doing such a great

24:11

job of cleaning up, and there were literally

24:13

I counted them nine tipped

24:15

over cups surrounding

24:19

surrounding the laptop, like

24:21

like four bottles, three cups, and they were

24:24

all tipped over. And

24:26

I almost felt bad just saying. I

24:28

didn't even say anything because it was just like so

24:30

like and it made me realize, Okay,

24:33

this is it. This is as good as it's

24:35

going to get. Because he's like he's

24:37

gone on this journey and he thinks he's like

24:39

nailing it and it's.

24:42

It's My husband actually

24:45

referenced you, Natasha in

24:47

terms of I can be a little bit. I'm definitely

24:49

the messier one, but I'm pretty good,

24:51

I would say. But he said

24:53

you inspired him and saying you

24:56

just can't have that fight anymore, like you just got

24:58

to let it go and accept it. So thank

25:00

you, But that's.

25:01

Not what we're really hearing from her here today

25:03

in the studio.

25:04

Wait, that was my advice, is

25:07

to just succumb to the.

25:10

Just like, do you want to have this fight for the

25:12

next, you know, twenty years or

25:14

do you just want to take the trash out?

25:17

Yeah?

25:17

That's depressing, Yeah

25:19

it is, but that's relationship.

25:21

Where do you live something? What

25:24

where do you live? Sir?

25:26

So I live in State New York.

25:28

It's right, okay, Skill Bainbridge,

25:32

I forgot you said that. Sorry. It seemed

25:34

like you mean Natasha and your husband should

25:37

all go out to dinner.

25:39

We wouldn't rearely die. Please. When

25:42

we first started dating, we used to

25:44

listen we were long distance and we would listened

25:46

to call Chelsea Freddy on the way back.

25:49

That's so sweet. Nothing better than a long

25:51

distance relationship.

25:53

But I think it

25:55

only lasted eight months.

25:56

It's all downhill from there. Well,

25:59

any you are a pleasure to talk to

26:01

you.

26:03

Yeah, this is a long one for Chelsea. She's hung up

26:05

on everybody else's cults.

26:06

I'm I'm incredibly honored. Do you have no

26:09

idea?

26:09

The honor is mine and mine.

26:12

Bye.

26:13

It's great to hear from you both.

26:14

By bye.

26:15

I guess people kind of they're fans of yours, so they

26:18

know they might get hung up on. So it's not really that.

26:20

Ch that's the idea. There's also like a disclaimer

26:22

now on the whole thing. But

26:26

it is this crazy thing of like if

26:30

you hang up too quickly, you're mean, but

26:32

if you let a call go too long, you're

26:34

boring. So I'm always at the intersection

26:37

of trying to just keep everyone happy.

26:39

I'm a people pleaser?

26:41

Are you really?

26:42

No? But you know how people are like, I'm trying to be

26:44

less of a people pleaser and you're like, you're not a

26:46

people pleaser.

26:47

Do you think I'm a people pleaser? Because I feel like I

26:49

am.

26:52

No. I don't know if I would describe you as a people

26:54

pleaser.

26:55

Okay, good.

26:56

Yeah. I don't know who I

26:58

would describe as a people pleaser. Actually, if

27:00

I think about it, it would be someone who

27:02

in my mind, it's someone who has no backbone

27:04

and who's really doing stuff all the time

27:06

to make others happy. But the people

27:08

who self identify as people pleasers,

27:10

in my experience, are often very self centered

27:13

people, and they're like, I've got

27:15

to stop people pleasing. It's like you're never

27:18

doing anything for someone other than yourself.

27:20

It's yeah, and

27:22

it's mine.

27:23

Okay, caller, what's your life

27:25

hack? Do you have a tip for us? Do you

27:27

have a shift in topic? We're open?

27:31

Oh my gosh, that's a really good question. My

27:34

topic is actually, how do you know what

27:37

your career should be? In this world?

27:40

How do you know? Well? I mean we had the luxury,

27:43

me and Natasha, I believe of knowing

27:46

well. I think you probably are like me. I feel

27:49

like you wanted to be a famous actress

27:51

since you.

27:51

Were young, right, I wanted to be an actress?

27:54

Yes, I mean you. Natasha

27:56

told me once that her like

27:59

careerunselur at school was suggesting

28:01

that she work at a checkout counter at

28:03

the grocery store.

28:05

So I'm from a kind of depressing area

28:07

in the Midwest, So that was

28:10

kind of the most college prep

28:12

we got no one, you know, because they need to

28:14

fill those slots. They need someone to work

28:16

at the There wasn't Costco

28:19

at the time, but you know, it was Union

28:21

Hall it was called. But

28:23

yeah, I think that first of all, you can have a few different

28:25

careers.

28:27

And you probably will. In this gig economy,

28:30

they'll be simultaneous. You could

28:32

be a door dash driver and a Postmates

28:34

driver and uh whatever.

28:37

Well, you know, I've been thinking about the driver Uber

28:39

eats.

28:39

There you go.

28:40

I was thinking about this recently because I was

28:42

thinking about this book I read

28:44

a while ago called mole Flanders

28:46

and it's kind of like pretentious literature

28:48

book and

28:52

the woman's a prostitute. And in the book

28:55

they say are you It's

28:58

from like the eighteen hundreds something, but they're like,

29:00

are you a whore by inclination

29:03

or by necessity?

29:05

Now, see that is a funny ass

29:07

clap back. Imagine someone's

29:09

saying something mean to you on your and

29:11

your comments and you just asked that exact question

29:14

to them.

29:14

Right well, and you can you can you can

29:16

place anything in that, like am I a

29:19

comedian by you

29:21

know, necessity or is it inclination? And

29:23

it's like for me, it was almost like necessity

29:26

because nothing else was working

29:28

out. So it's like, what are

29:30

the things?

29:31

What were your false starts?

29:33

Acting? I guess

29:36

yeah, acting like wanting to be like Marilyn

29:38

Monroe. I don't know. I thought I was going to be like a

29:41

list movie star right out the gate,

29:44

you know, and that I

29:46

think so too.

29:47

I would watch you in an A list movie.

29:49

I think you, Thank you. I'm

29:51

on the Who's who's that woman from

29:53

the Crown? I want to be on her tip? What's

29:56

her name? Oh, Olivia Coleman. I want to be on the Olivia

29:58

Coleman track. We're the same age.

30:00

Yeah, No, there's actually a

30:02

lot of great role models for

30:05

amazing actresses in their

30:07

forties and fifties right now. In fact,

30:09

I mean, it is so crazy, Actually

30:11

that isn't Jennifer Lopez.

30:13

How old is she she

30:15

is? I think my age forty

30:17

eight or something.

30:20

I think it's almost I don't know. It cuts both

30:22

ways. You kind of want women to look shittier as

30:24

they get older, so that the bar isn't so high,

30:27

you know.

30:27

I know what you mean. And then also it

30:29

gets to the point where like I don't want to look at myself

30:31

on camera when an old hag she's

30:34

what fifty four? She was pretty

30:36

good?

30:36

Geez, hey, how about this, geez

30:40

Louise.

30:41

But maybe you could do a little experiment and

30:43

write out the things that really you

30:46

know, here's the.

30:46

Thing I forgot.

30:47

There's a caller, what does what do you

30:50

love doing? Just by your nature

30:52

like inclination, like what do you do?

30:54

Without answer that? Please?

30:56

I really love plants and gardening. I

30:58

think one of my dream jobs would to like work in a

31:00

greenhouse or something like that. But

31:03

I also like making money, and those don't

31:05

sound really compatible. So you know, it's

31:08

hard. It's like you gotta do something kind

31:10

of boring to make money and then do fund

31:12

things in your free time.

31:15

My landscaper would beg to differ.

31:18

I have your landscaper.

31:21

Well, I mean yeah, but I'm just saying landscapers

31:23

do charge uh. I mean,

31:25

I don't know what their profit margin is,

31:28

but they definitely charge a fuck load of

31:30

money and they work with plants all the time.

31:32

I have two words for you, honey, native

31:34

plants. That's

31:37

the future. So try to like study

31:39

that a little bit like what does the And also

31:41

when you're thinking of your passion, ask yourself,

31:44

what does the world need, you

31:46

know, like, and if it's like you love

31:48

doing it and the world needs it, there's

31:51

a way to like figure it out. And yeah, like when

31:53

I was starting out, I had to waitress for

31:55

like ten years and it fucking sucked

31:58

and I hated it. But I would alway always

32:00

like cancel my waitressing gig for like a show

32:02

at the Haha or whatever.

32:04

I don't honestly, that's a toss up. I don't

32:07

know which I would choose of those two options.

32:09

But I just remember I was always I was

32:11

always getting people to like cover for me. So,

32:13

you know, a job with flexibility to make

32:16

money while you pursue your passions, if

32:18

especially if it's something that you think the world needs

32:20

and that's something that you're good at and that you

32:22

love doing.

32:23

But the problem is is now it's like it

32:26

used to be like you could have a job that would like

32:30

would finance your passion job, but now

32:32

it's like you have to have like five jobs

32:34

to finance your passion job. I'm

32:36

really hammering home this gig economy

32:38

thing. But I have a question for

32:40

you, Natasha, do you do you miss Moshaw

32:42

right now when you're podcasting with me?

32:46

You know, I would say that's a that's

32:49

a no

32:51

no.

32:52

I sorry

32:54

Mosh.

32:56

But he but he has been an ever presence

32:58

in the house, talking

33:00

pretty NonStop about his books. So now he's

33:02

on his book.

33:03

Tour, yeah, talking to people talking

33:05

about Yeah, who want to hear about

33:08

it.

33:08

I'm glad that he wrote his book. He's very talented.

33:10

He got a great review in the New York Times.

33:13

And I

33:16

know that we miss you motion, We

33:18

do miss you, but it's really nice to diversify,

33:21

Chelsea.

33:21

Yeah, well I just was figuring. You know, it's

33:24

like here you are, You're in a

33:26

duo situation on a podcast.

33:29

I mean, I'm so used to watching

33:31

your clips with you in motion picking what side

33:33

him on him, Like, hey, I don't know what our comedy

33:35

game is, because you know, you

33:38

and him are so often completely

33:41

opposing sides of things that it

33:43

gives like a natural kind.

33:45

Of Oh you think maybe we agree too much?

33:48

Oh god, I just spurped lightly, lightly,

33:52

Natasha.

33:53

I really love that your advice is often times

33:55

to just break up with somebody, because I do

33:57

think that is the right call more often than not.

34:00

Well, I did find a trend in my twenties where

34:02

I would like go out with someone for

34:04

six months and then spend like, uh

34:07

nine months trying to dump them. Yeah, And

34:09

it was like kind of a waste.

34:11

And I was like, maybe you aren't people pleaser

34:14

because, like from Tolerant, once

34:16

I want to break up with someone like

34:19

historically, like then it's just I

34:22

can't, like you know, like on Love Island the

34:24

UK, Love Island, of course everyone knows

34:26

they talk about when someone gives them the

34:29

ick, and it's just so true.

34:31

Once you get the ick from someone, you got

34:33

to end that off. Like I couldn't go nine

34:35

months. What if you got three kids though, Well

34:37

that's different. I'm talking about pre kid.

34:41

Yeah.

34:44

Well the pandemic was

34:46

not good for the ICKX.

34:47

No, I'm just not talking about

34:50

your marriage. I'm saying, how.

34:51

Did you Can I tell you something motion did during

34:54

the pandemic?

34:54

Okay.

34:55

I walked into the bedroom and he had a metal

34:57

bowl full of popcorn

35:00

that he was eating with a ladle and the ladle

35:02

was scraping the bottom of and

35:05

I saw, what are you doing in bed? And

35:07

he said it gets it so that there's the

35:10

right amount of seasoning on every bite and.

35:13

I can't stay that is so risky.

35:16

But with the ladle and the

35:18

metal, the metal, it was just like the

35:20

scrape of it. I was just

35:22

pretty floored. Yeah, that's

35:25

that's that's an ick.

35:27

That is.

35:29

God because I you know, we're raising a child

35:31

together. So you just gotta like motor

35:34

through it, lick it up.

35:39

You get like the opposite of the so

35:42

like the the other side of the coin where

35:44

you're like, oh, that's actually really hot.

35:46

We have to go Hello,

35:52

Hello, You're on with Natasha

35:54

Lazaro. Chelsea Pretty We're talking

35:57

about cohabitating, we're

35:59

talking about household care.

36:01

We're talking about life hacks, though no one's really

36:03

given us a single life hack. We might have to

36:06

go to Reddit for that.

36:07

Oh one more thing, Can I just say one thing?

36:09

This morning I texted you this, Chelsea, but

36:12

Mosha, he was like, I did the laundry. I

36:14

go, where's the laundry from the dryer? He was like,

36:16

oh, I just left it on the floor down there. And

36:18

I was like what, And he goes, well,

36:21

you don't have to act like that if you want me to use a basket

36:23

just tell me and I.

36:25

I want you to use a basket.

36:26

But like it's there's just so many steps,

36:28

Like why would I ever think to tell him

36:30

to use a basket? That's just part of no.

36:32

I know, Like as I get older, the more and more

36:34

I just want to have like one of those little

36:37

things that prints labels and just put

36:39

explicit extructions on everything in the

36:41

house.

36:41

That would be smart. Or we could have like a female

36:43

commune.

36:44

Yeah, mommune, mm

36:46

love it. Are you drinking something

36:49

in a huge jug right now?

36:53

How did you know?

36:55

It was very loud? What

36:57

are you doing one of those massive hydrations.

37:00

I'm taking a bath, but I also have my

37:02

forty broommate, I have

37:04

COVID, so I'm taking the day

37:06

off.

37:07

Wait, you're in the bathtub, see il. I'll

37:10

sometimes take calls in the bathtub, and

37:13

I'm like so worried that my age.

37:17

And we all know, I know,

37:19

like when when your arm, you know,

37:22

grazes across the water, creating

37:24

the sound of a swan flapping around.

37:27

Can someone make an image of Chelsea and I

37:29

in the bathtub taking calls?

37:31

Take that back?

37:35

Okay, this girl

37:38

talk. She's got COVID, she's calling in. That's

37:40

commitment.

37:41

Wow, No, thank you, thank

37:43

you. No, that was crazy because I was picking

37:45

up my forty ounce brew

37:48

me as you said that, so I was very

37:50

like, very confused.

37:52

Do sound kind of sick? So that's good.

37:55

Do you have any COVID hacks?

37:58

No?

37:59

I don't do you Anita,

38:03

all.

38:03

Right, what were you gonna say?

38:06

I did have attack?

38:09

Okay, I did steal it.

38:11

Off one of those viral verus. You guys know that

38:14

salmon girl who made all that like salmon

38:16

and rice bowls.

38:17

Oh, Emily Marico. Yeah,

38:20

yeah, that's the why I love her. I love

38:22

that she's called that salmon girl. It

38:25

feels beneath her.

38:26

I have to say, why does she what was

38:28

so great about the salmon?

38:29

You know, she's very elegant, and she

38:32

does these cooking videos that are a little

38:34

bit asmr I think because

38:37

she doesn't narrate them in that fucking

38:39

corny, annoying voice that everyone who

38:41

makes content does.

38:43

Okay, as you can see, this is easy, peasy. I'm putting

38:45

the salmon into the thing, Liba. She just

38:47

quietly makes her fucking food and minds her own

38:49

business. But she makes really good looking food.

38:51

Though there was some controversy that she

38:53

didn't season well enough for some people,

38:56

and everyone always finds something to pick at and

38:58

bitch about about everyone who may anything.

39:01

But anyway, she makes a lot of like but

39:04

it's very balanced, but a lot of healthy food

39:06

and a lot of like, very delicious

39:08

looking food. And one

39:10

of her go tos was she

39:13

would make what was it? She would like break

39:15

up the salmon and put it with rice and

39:17

seasoning and then put it.

39:19

It was like leftover salmon with rice,

39:21

and then she'd squirret over like siracha

39:24

and that special cup male over

39:26

it and then eat it with like kimchi

39:29

and seweed, yeah, an

39:31

avocado.

39:32

But then it's like she got married, her wedding

39:34

became very designery and the whole

39:36

thing. I don't know. She started going to Paris,

39:38

like I felt like it took a turn, you know,

39:42

listen. I signed up for her newsletter, Honey.

39:44

I was very invested because I felt

39:47

I felt like she had a very like a lot of people

39:49

who make healthy food online like it looks

39:51

disgusting. Oh oh, I

39:54

forgot yet COVID reality

39:57

came crashing down, Like anyway,

40:02

what a journey we go on with these people

40:04

online? That we've never met, right, Ain't.

40:07

That the truth? Yeah? I deleted

40:10

TikTok so I stopped.

40:11

Following her once that what was the final

40:14

straw that she went to Paris?

40:17

The files? Oh god, it

40:19

was just sucking my brain out through

40:22

my nose like it was bad.

40:24

Yeah.

40:24

Would you? Would you be at the gym and

40:27

put up an app that just showed

40:29

you art history and different paintings and

40:31

what what the highlights of the paintings

40:34

are? Like the takeaways?

40:35

I try anything one?

40:37

So you'd be open to a gym Enrichmond Visual

40:39

Media program.

40:44

Wait, okay, maybe you should do this because

40:46

it would The world needs it. That's the thing. It's

40:49

like a passion for you and the world needs

40:51

it. We need to start combating the TikTok.

40:54

I agree. My attention span went so

40:56

down it was terrible.

40:59

You know, my daughter is an at an after

41:01

program in kindergarten and she has now

41:03

come home four times because

41:05

they just let her do whatever she wants with a

41:08

cell phone. She's made every day. She's

41:10

got a fold a piece of paper with all the apps.

41:12

I hate to say it, what it's because

41:14

she sees you guys on your.

41:15

Phone, I know, and she's so proud

41:18

of it, but like four days in a row, like I want

41:20

to ask the teachers, like, can you guys like give

41:22

her something else to do? Then make a cell

41:24

phone out of paper and then she's like, here's

41:26

all the apps and then she opens it and she goes, this is where

41:29

you buy things.

41:30

And oh god, we live in dark

41:32

times. But you know, my mom was reminding

41:35

me that, like when she was a kid, she

41:37

did bomb drills under her desk at school,

41:39

and I'm like, I guess we were always in dark times.

41:41

I mean, the bubonic plague is a go to

41:43

for me mentally. I go. People must

41:46

have just been like, can you imagine

41:48

being alive during the bubonic plague?

41:51

Yeah, that's it's rough.

41:52

You just have to be like, yeah, you'd

41:54

be like wor in the worst timeline.

41:57

And then it's like enter

41:59

twenty twenty through twenty

42:01

twenty four.

42:02

Well, it does feel like TikTok is making us not

42:04

live up to our potential. I mean, if it's

42:06

just sucking your brain and making you buy things

42:09

and like think that you know things without reading

42:11

any books just from headlines, you

42:14

know.

42:15

Yeah, I mean it's tricky because throughout all

42:17

the tech stuff. I mean, my first memory

42:19

of getting really invested in technology in

42:21

the way that now it's just unthinkable

42:24

to not be away from it was college.

42:27

I hear your bath. College

42:30

I would play Hot or Not on

42:32

the college computer lab computer

42:35

with my friend A GK. And we

42:37

would sit there and play that. And

42:40

then it was like all these different phases blog

42:43

Spot friends.

42:43

Stir Mosha talks about you are the first person to tell

42:45

about friends.

42:46

Yeah, my Space, Like, I've gone through

42:48

so many rounds of these things, and so now

42:51

Instagram has it was

42:53

like my favorite. Well also just Twitter. I mean I

42:56

cannot believe that Twitter as

42:58

we know it has been so estimated.

43:00

I mean it really was the funnest place

43:03

for a good stretch of time in which which medians

43:05

especially yes, where it was just this free

43:07

marketplace of funny ideas, every

43:10

funny dumb thought I had. I mean, my favorite way

43:12

to use Twitter was just the most minuscule

43:15

thoughts, you know, thought deposit Yeah,

43:17

like it doesn't even warrant an announcement,

43:19

and putting it there like my toe itches

43:22

or you know, like one time I

43:24

like was tweeting Jordan, could you bring me a

43:26

glass of water? You know, things

43:28

like that, Like I miss having like a place

43:31

to put those kinds of silly things.

43:33

And I can put them in a stand up I

43:40

think maybe not the water one.

43:41

But yeah, I actually did write some jokes

43:44

when I was in London. I felt a little bit

43:46

inspired and I was kind of like I would be

43:48

interested to try doing stand up in London anyway.

43:51

But all this to say, and

43:53

then I really was into Instagram because I mostly

43:55

followed nature accounts and like art

43:57

museums and things like that. Then I started

44:00

following all these glam people, you

44:02

know, makeup artists, hair people.

44:04

And frantic moms telling you what

44:06

to do. See, I don't mine

44:08

is all mom.

44:09

There was one account I followed that was

44:11

about like, I don't want

44:13

to call out what the name was, but there was one account. I followed

44:15

it and then I was like, you know what, I don't agree

44:17

with half the shit they're saying. I

44:20

don't I

44:22

forget what. There was a culminating event in

44:24

which I was like, I'm unfollowing this and so I don't follow

44:26

any of those mom accounts like that. But

44:30

it's lost its allure, is what I'm saying. Instagram.

44:32

And then TikTok is gone TikTok, which,

44:34

like you know, younger kids are into. I

44:37

haven't quite latched on to

44:39

TikTok in the way that in

44:42

the past I've latched on to whatever the new

44:44

thing is, Like I don't I don't

44:46

know. I'm starting to actually like I truly,

44:49

As I mentioned before, I'm getting into pottery,

44:52

and I'm finding that part of

44:54

the reason I love it is my hands are filthy

44:56

and I cannot pick up my phone. Like I'm

44:58

literally seeking things in which I cannot,

45:01

Like, phone use is not an option because

45:04

it used to be like that

45:06

all the time, and now it's like

45:08

you're you're almost so out of control

45:11

of your use, or at least I am out of my use

45:13

of technology that I'm seeking experiences

45:15

like an escape room, doing

45:18

pottery or a game night in which

45:21

it's just like so disruptive

45:24

to get into your phone that it's not

45:26

really an option. And that's what I'm

45:28

like, I might do goat yoga.

45:31

You should, I'll do it with you, would you It

45:33

sounds a little disgusting, I mean, you can't smell.

45:36

Yeah, I don't know. I'm not fully sold, but I'm seeking

45:38

those kinds of experiences.

45:40

Also I was always trying out the things they were telling

45:42

me to do on Instagram and TikTok. Like they'd say to

45:44

say to your kid, like, don't say good jobs,

45:46

say you worked really hard on that. And then I would

45:49

tell my daughter that she made something, I go, you

45:51

worked really hard on that, and she was like, no, I didn't.

45:53

They don't tell you what to say once they say the thing

45:55

to you, you know, you.

45:57

Know what, I know that advice, and I

45:59

do agree with it, because here's the problem. If

46:01

you tell the kids that they're just really

46:03

good at everything, then trying

46:05

and working hard is not something they value.

46:08

They value being naturally instantly good at

46:10

everything.

46:10

But aren't you getting a little pandering?

46:12

But what I'll say is this, I can tell you really

46:14

focused better when you

46:16

made this. I can tell like you really

46:19

were thoughtful about it, or are you really focused,

46:21

or you put a lot of energy into it, you know, like you

46:24

don't have to like follow their stupid advice

46:26

word for word. But I do think that

46:30

for kids who are naturally good at stuff,

46:33

you don't want them to give up if they're

46:35

not naturally good at something new. You

46:37

know, no one.

46:38

Ever complimented me when I was little really

46:41

not much. I mean I got like positive

46:43

reinforcement when I was like at the theater, but

46:46

it was more like I was

46:48

kind of not told. I was not very

46:50

encouraged.

46:52

That's sad.

46:54

Let's call your mom.

46:56

Oh my god, I wonder if you would pick up.

46:58

This is a crazy favorite ask of you, But would

47:00

you mind grabbing my purse? I want to put on a little more

47:02

lipstick?

47:04

Is it because you're looking at me and thinking I need some?

47:06

No? But I just always run out, like I talk

47:08

it off, thank you, and then I'm

47:10

like, oh, I have none on.

47:12

At the end of the podcast, call her. I gotta

47:14

go. This has been I don't know what we're doing

47:16

here.

47:17

We're taking a lipstick break.

47:18

Sorry, honey, all right.

47:22

Wow, it's just NonStop over here.

47:23

Tell me, yeah, honey, what do you think? I love

47:25

that lip You know this lip

47:28

color is the only one I use. Hey, keep

47:30

it. Don't tell them. Oh.

47:32

I just told my friend just did my

47:34

podcast and asked me what it was, and I told her, you don't

47:36

think tell people. I don't care

47:38

if everyone looks good in my lip

47:40

color.

47:41

But that's cool. Hi,

47:44

up, don't

47:47

guilt us.

47:50

I want to know about the lip color.

47:52

Now, my color is can

47:54

I tell people you do what you want? It

47:56

is mac

47:59

powder hiss, So it's a little draw you

48:01

got it add a little at a little.

48:04

They don't make a moist version of it.

48:06

But if you reapply, it looks good. But it does get darker.

48:09

And my color that I like is a

48:11

little tame.

48:13

It's really pretty.

48:14

Guess how often I switch it up? Never?

48:18

Never, I'm very I have

48:20

a life hack. I

48:23

wear the same outfit two

48:26

to three days in a row, usually three, and

48:29

I because then I can get dressed. Like Chelsea

48:31

called me half hour hour before

48:33

I had to be here, I could get ready so

48:35

fast because I just wore exactly what I wore on my

48:37

podcast last night, because I don't really,

48:40

you know, sweat that much.

48:41

And also very underway, like

48:43

you offered me to get one of these jumpsuits,

48:45

which I really was thinking about, which you

48:48

know sometimes I get torn about, like friends

48:50

buying stuff that I have, But

48:53

I thought that was really generous of you.

48:55

Big bud press jumpsuit.

48:57

Why not should we all get them? Listeners

49:00

the kind of love.

49:01

I love jumpsuits.

49:02

I've bought one last year for my birthday and it's

49:04

adorable, and I.

49:05

Haven't worn it out because I feel like it's.

49:07

Almost too fancy fancy

49:09

jumpsuit.

49:09

But I think I just got to put.

49:10

It on and then just go out in the world.

49:13

Yeah, well, you know what you can do sometimes with the

49:15

fancy jump shoot shoot jumpsuit

49:19

is a cash

49:21

will shoot. I

49:23

don't know what your cackling that. I have to be honest.

49:25

What did you say? Oh, I don't know.

49:27

I said you said jump shoot and I said

49:29

bee ball. But I was just playing.

49:31

Around, having fun, feeling free

49:35

a little bit.

49:35

I had to hide from my baby. She's screaming.

49:37

So wait a minute, did you call it like last episode?

49:40

Oh, Chelsea, I did. I'm really surprised

49:43

that you answered, because I actually left you

49:45

a voicemail because

49:47

I got arrested for going one hundred and five

49:49

and a fifty driving a Honda when I was

49:51

seventeen.

49:57

But the thing is, I don't know. I have to do a jackpot

50:00

because I'm a little suspicious you didn't

50:02

mention this last Yeah.

50:05

No, because I just it happened when I

50:07

was I'm thirty five. It happened when I was seventeen,

50:09

and like, it's just so far away.

50:11

You know, wait,

50:13

what is this a life hack or what what's this

50:15

have to do?

50:16

This is not a life hack, I'll

50:18

tell you that. But it's

50:21

luckily I didn't get my license suspended.

50:23

I mean there was a lot there.

50:26

I was driving home from my boyfriend's house.

50:28

Just so you know, Chelsea is hovering over

50:30

the hangup buttons, so this better be good.

50:33

I mean, it's whatever.

50:34

I just got arrested for going one hundred

50:36

and five and a fifty. Yeah,

50:39

that's pretty much it I got.

50:40

I went to jail. I actually worked

50:42

at Chick fil.

50:42

A at the time. It was like one of my first

50:45

jobs. And when I was in jail,

50:47

I had Chick fil A coupons in my pocket

50:49

and I like gave them out to people, and I was

50:51

like, people, please, it'd be nice to me.

50:56

I have to go on.

50:56

Luckily.

50:58

I just sometimes I get like a

51:01

little like we need to spread the calls

51:03

around, Like I don't.

51:04

Know because she already called, she's calling back.

51:06

That's kind of.

51:09

Hello caller.

51:11

Hello.

51:13

Oh that was a healthy pause. Is

51:15

your pause pregnant?

51:18

Did I get through?

51:20

No?

51:22

I'm like, really, I thought I was just gonna

51:24

get your voicemail like before, I have a

51:26

food test. If you want to do it, I know

51:28

that.

51:29

Yeah, sorry, okay, let's do it. That's

51:31

a great idea.

51:33

The flavor rose.

51:35

Oh that's a good one.

51:37

Okay, Natasha. Do you think it's good or bad?

51:39

Well, it's amazing in mint tea. So I'm gonna

51:42

say good Rose mint tea. And I've

51:44

also had it in like Italian cookies

51:46

and it's really good.

51:48

That is a really good one. Though.

51:50

Actually at this place, Cafe

51:52

Kasba, it's closed down, but that was

51:54

their secret to the mint tea. All you do is put

51:57

crushed mint leaves in hot water

51:59

and like a tables of rose water, and then you

52:01

can't tell what the secret ingredient is.

52:02

Oh that's cool.

52:05

You don't even use tea bags just to mint.

52:06

Okay, So I'm gonna also say good.

52:10

I'm so sorry to say no, you're

52:12

wrong.

52:13

I'm gonna override.

52:15

It's called overall overall.

52:18

Okay, so overrulled. Next

52:21

one, Okay, I accept

52:23

salt water tappy. Ah.

52:26

I don't like it just because it's nasty to get

52:28

that in your teeth. It just seems like it causes cavities.

52:31

I do like it, however,

52:34

I I can't say

52:37

I love it, but there are certain

52:39

flavors that are good. I like, you know,

52:41

if I'm in a seaside town, there's something kind

52:43

of fun about it. This is my problem with food.

52:45

Like an I go yes,

52:48

well no, I'm like, I can't be in a seaside

52:50

town and say no to saltwater tappy.

52:52

So it's like anytime I travel, I'm like, well, surely

52:55

I have to try the local delicacy. And

52:57

then it's like, you know, five

53:00

hundred pounds later. Anyway, caller,

53:02

is it good or is it bad?

53:05

It's bad if

53:07

a food is only good in certain instances,

53:10

I feel like we just have to go, you

53:12

know, for that novelty aspect that's not

53:14

good at all?

53:15

Right? Would you get it at the mall?

53:16

And I like your moxie.

53:20

You've influenced me through the years.

53:22

Okay, well I think I'm I I am starting

53:24

to like, you know, how dogs respond to like

53:26

assertive energy.

53:32

I'm kind of responding how

53:34

you're throwing down right now. Okay, So

53:36

okay, I agree. Then I don't know rose

53:39

water and saltwater taffy. I guess

53:41

I can say bad,

53:43

but secretly, in my heart, I do think

53:45

they're kind of good depending on the situation. But

53:47

if I I guess, I'm gonna go with your your

53:49

ruling for the moment.

53:51

Except for that tea, I'm telling you should try it secret

53:53

INGREDI where is that at kas

53:55

Bob? But it closed down? But I asked them

53:58

once, what do you put in this? Because it's just leaves,

54:00

but it didn't taste like freshman fresh

54:02

mint leaves.

54:03

We can make that. I bought fresh yes.

54:05

And put a little capful of the rosewater, and I'm

54:07

telling you make sure it's edible

54:09

rose water. I think there's a kind of spray on

54:11

your face.

54:15

You make tea with a face wash

54:18

like I don't know, Natasha, it's

54:20

not tasting so good. Okay,

54:23

what what's any other foods on your list?

54:26

Yeah? So, speaking of tea, how

54:28

about Earl Gray tea with milk?

54:30

I like it.

54:30

I say, good, you're wrong if you

54:32

don't like Okay.

54:34

Okay, I didn't tell you yet,

54:36

but okay.

54:37

Okay, no, we're with you. Wait, it's not gotting a

54:39

fight. We're with you.

54:40

I have an addendum. I went to Uruguay once

54:42

and it was a place where they had

54:44

a tea Sammolier and

54:46

he told me that Darjeeling

54:49

is the Champagne of teas. Have

54:52

you ever tried that? Chells?

54:54

You know? I have, but I think it was probably like Twinings.

54:57

I don't know if it was the Champagne of brands.

55:00

I feel like, if you're doing a

55:02

tea bag, you're not You're not getting

55:04

the Champagne of tea right.

55:06

In the job, right, That's true.

55:09

But yeah, Earl Gray is probably I think

55:11

like if I'm if I'm doing a high tea, which I've done

55:13

maybe three times in my life, you know, if

55:15

you're like an old fashioned hotel or with my kid,

55:17

I would probably get the Earl Gray.

55:19

Because it has we do high tea once a week.

55:22

Do you really know? Wait, but what is your

55:24

high tea order when you know it's going to be the best

55:26

tea?

55:28

I don't know. I just I don't. I'm not that much

55:30

of a tea head. I'm not as as

55:32

knowledgeable. I do like PG tips.

55:34

PG tips is great, g yeah,

55:37

and that's also what people in England drink.

55:39

That one's good.

55:41

I always buy that, but it's good if

55:43

you're out of coffee. I find the world.

55:44

Of tea is immense color.

55:48

Are you still there?

55:49

I'm still here. I'm just trying to breathe

55:52

because I'm like

55:54

I never thought i'd get through. I'm a very,

55:56

I'm a very I'm like an og call Chelsea.

55:59

Really yes, So

56:01

I'm in stock right now.

56:04

You're doing a really good job of

56:06

impressing Chelsea. I have to say, Okay,

56:10

wait, so.

56:11

What's your next food item.

56:14

I'm gonna go I'm controversial

56:17

and ask about durry.

56:18

It Durian fruit. Yes,

56:21

I don't okay, so it supposedly

56:24

it like smells like shit or something. I

56:26

but it tastes delicious. I really

56:28

want to try it. There's this weird hippie

56:31

white guy that like eats a bunch of tropical

56:33

fruits all the time on Instagram that I follow,

56:36

and he's ridiculous,

56:38

like oh like every single

56:40

freeze like and like there's only

56:42

been one that he says he doesn't like or something,

56:45

but like they'll be. It made

56:47

me want to try all these things, and in

56:49

fact, I did try mango stein. I

56:54

love light chi. I don't know if you say leechy

56:56

or light chi.

56:56

I think it's I feel like it really depends

56:59

on if you speak and I

57:01

speak Mandarin.

57:03

If you speak Mandarin, no I don't.

57:05

Oh I was gonna ask you to say it for us and.

57:07

Mandarin, then no, I don't. But I

57:09

do think it's leechy.

57:11

I've heard both. I feel like.

57:15

I literally am and of Chinese

57:17

ancestry, and I feel like I don't even know what people

57:19

say in English.

57:20

Oh well, anyway,

57:23

it made me want to try a bunch of tropical fruits

57:25

and Durian he was

57:27

describing it like caramel pudding

57:30

and stuff like that.

57:33

Yeah, I think there's like a lot of cremin

57:35

is to it. I mean the answer to this is

57:37

yes. I will say that just

57:40

getting used to that fragrance is

57:42

it's such an interesting thing to take

57:44

in and then to then eat it. It's like, oh wow,

57:47

it tastes so much better than it

57:49

smells. And then there's a different texture profile

57:51

that you might be used to when you're eating fruit.

57:54

Right, Why does it have to

57:56

it's so fascinating. Why does it smell

57:58

bad? I mean maybe it

58:01

smells like shit because that attracts

58:04

pollinators, Like it could attract animals

58:08

to eat it and then shot out the seeds,

58:11

which would help pollinate it. It could

58:14

also attract

58:16

you know, I don't know pollinators

58:19

to it. Listen, I've gone on a couple of little

58:21

botanical hikes and now I think I have a theory.

58:23

But it is weird that

58:26

something would smell so bad and be edible.

58:29

I think you're onto something. It's like the same thing

58:31

where I've been told, like you

58:34

know, Durian has that hard outer shell

58:36

and then that pineapple and like pineapple and other

58:38

tropical food that outside. It's

58:41

like it's like supposed to be like to

58:43

protect the inside. I think, right,

58:45

like to like get people away

58:47

from it, to protect it, because it's trying

58:50

to scare people away.

58:53

So they don't hog it all.

58:55

I think it's but so maybe they don't eat it because I've heard

58:57

in my life people being like pineapple is

58:59

poison this because of the outside or

59:01

whatever.

59:04

But isn't it widely known that it's not poisonous.

59:08

You know.

59:08

I'm meant, like famously one of the best ferusts

59:12

in the biz.

59:14

No, I just meant, I think it's like something about

59:16

animals like being deterred

59:18

by that external, by

59:21

the outside of the fruit. M

59:24

all right, this is really

59:26

kind of gone downhill.

59:27

It it has. But see the fact

59:29

that you even recognize this. You're really

59:32

like you could produce this for this

59:34

show? You're

59:38

ready? Dare I say you are ready?

59:42

I mean, I'm og a

59:44

listener enough to be like. I remember when I bought

59:46

your app this and then I

59:49

tried to find it again on my Apple Store

59:51

and I was so sad when I couldn't see it. I

59:53

couldn't download it back.

59:56

I did have an app and it was really cool, and

59:59

I swindled.

1:00:01

Are you gonna go see first time female director?

1:00:04

I saw it at when

1:00:06

she was at in the New York

1:00:08

I forgot what the New York is? It just New York's I

1:00:12

I when I when Chelsea came on

1:00:14

for afterward, I was in shock because I just

1:00:17

bought the ticket to watch it, and then she came

1:00:19

on and I couldn't close my mouth

1:00:21

because I was in shock to see her.

1:00:23

How great is that movie? How great is Chelsea?

1:00:25

She wrote this, she directed it, she stars

1:00:28

in it.

1:00:28

It was absolutely incredible, just what

1:00:31

so many people were excited, I think because of

1:00:33

the connection with the pod too. So

1:00:37

I've seen it already. Thank you for.

1:00:38

Asking, did you recognize Natasha

1:00:40

in it?

1:00:43

I'm I did, I think,

1:00:45

but I think I don't want to be offensive,

1:00:47

but I feel like Natasha has one of those spaces

1:00:49

where she looks like other people too, so

1:00:52

I have, so I don't always recognize her.

1:00:54

No, it was. It was obviously a memorable starterm

1:00:57

for me.

1:00:58

I'm sorry, I'm I'm sorry.

1:01:02

The same good Bye.

1:01:07

What a call, what a journey?

1:01:09

I think she really nailed it. She was nervous,

1:01:11

but she uh.

1:01:12

No, she came through. The food test was top

1:01:14

notch.

1:01:17

Me.

1:01:17

I totally thought you were gone.

1:01:19

I didn't hang up.

1:01:21

I would love to be hung up on.

1:01:23

Okay, hold on you

1:01:25

seemed like a wait. I don't want to hit that one. We're

1:01:28

gonna getting Dingo's like out of time.

1:01:29

Goodbye, Wow,

1:01:36

it's you're really good at this, Chelsea really.

1:01:40

Hello, Hello,

1:01:44

the first lady of lattes, the queen of caffeine

1:01:46

herself.

1:01:48

Well, well, well, my friend copy

1:01:52

copy.

1:01:57

Right, you

1:02:01

should That working video you

1:02:03

sent me tells you should put this to it

1:02:05

and post it nowhere. So good.

1:02:08

Chelsea is such a good dancer.

1:02:12

Oh if only you could keep me right now. You want to dance

1:02:14

too?

1:02:15

She has such a great butt, and

1:02:19

she's a wonderful.

1:02:20

How about music not only but

1:02:22

is great. But what about her shoulders. She's got fantastic

1:02:24

shoulders.

1:02:25

It really does. You're so right.

1:02:28

I have very narrow, slight shoulders.

1:02:31

I have very narrow shoulders for a man, and it's very

1:02:33

frustrating every time I see it.

1:02:34

Well, take mine shoulder. People

1:02:36

always come up to me and poke my shoulders.

1:02:39

Really, I think I'm wearing shoulder pads.

1:02:41

No, but it's it's a very slick, sleek

1:02:44

figure. It's it's really good.

1:02:45

Did you know that it's a universally attractive feature

1:02:48

for men and women to have broad shoulders?

1:02:50

Really?

1:02:50

Women, I didn't think it was for women.

1:02:52

Yes, very like model like.

1:02:55

Yes, like hang

1:02:58

hang off of you. Well, you

1:03:01

got to have those broad shoulders to give the silhouettes.

1:03:03

It's a nice silhouette.

1:03:04

Thank you.

1:03:06

Anyway, you didn't want to talk to me. You wanted to talk

1:03:08

about your shoulders. You wanted to talk to me because

1:03:10

you wanted to hear praise about your

1:03:12

music. And we need more music. It's

1:03:15

got to be more music coming soon.

1:03:18

Some of those songs are banger's Chelsea.

1:03:20

Yeah, is

1:03:22

that what you I mean? I feel like you did it. I feel like you did a

1:03:24

you know you did a Coffee album, You could do a Bear album,

1:03:27

you could you could pick anyone in the topics, right,

1:03:29

I mean, listen, I'll.

1:03:30

Tell you the God's honest truth. If I were to do

1:03:32

another album, I feel like Kojak never explained

1:03:35

to me that it's a legal nightmare to make

1:03:37

music with collaborators. Like

1:03:40

you know, it's like it was not a massively money

1:03:43

making endeavor and like I had to pay so

1:03:45

many legal fees to like handle the

1:03:47

music. And so if

1:03:49

I were to do another album, which Lord

1:03:52

only knows I may never do, I

1:03:55

would want it to just be me and Kojak and

1:03:57

make it in like a week.

1:04:00

Well, I'll take what I can get because

1:04:03

the world needs.

1:04:03

It's fantastic.

1:04:05

What is this when a berry is berylnd

1:04:07

Dorgia? You gotta find your

1:04:10

whistle whistle?

1:04:13

Oh hey, there that's the rudiness

1:04:16

puting this song I ever heard.

1:04:17

Oh my goodness, are you an actor?

1:04:20

No? No?

1:04:21

And I'm not calling because I want to be. I'm not any one

1:04:23

of those people that's going hell, you know, something will work with

1:04:25

you, dad,

1:04:28

I don't do anything.

1:04:29

What are you? You're a stay at home dad.

1:04:31

I'm gonna stay at home dad. Yeah, that's the best.

1:04:34

How do you manage your household? You're probably the

1:04:36

perfect caller for this question.

1:04:38

Oh what's the question?

1:04:40

That's how do I manage my house?

1:04:41

How do you divide up household chores? And

1:04:43

how do you keep your house running smoothly

1:04:45

and keep it well?

1:04:47

Well, we have a very simple

1:04:50

breakdown where I

1:04:53

am assigned to do everything, and

1:04:56

then everything that I don't do, my

1:04:58

wife will do when she's not working and

1:05:00

tell me that, you know, why should

1:05:02

I be doing this when I have my time off? This is

1:05:04

what you should have been doing. And I go, you're right,

1:05:06

you're right.

1:05:07

Does she give you a list every day? Or how does it work?

1:05:10

There's there's a.

1:05:11

List on occasion, there's a list. There's

1:05:13

like she'll walk downstairs and go, uh, you

1:05:15

know, have you been in the bathroom because

1:05:18

it's not looking great. She'd probably

1:05:21

notice when you're in there, And I go, you're right.

1:05:23

I'm trying to think of the funniest person that his wife

1:05:26

could be. I was first

1:05:28

like Kamala, like,

1:05:31

but what does your wife do?

1:05:33

She's the vice president? Yeah, yeah, okay, very

1:05:36

intuition. No, she's

1:05:38

a she works on a computer all day she's

1:05:40

like, she talks about her job a lot, and then I go, uh huh,

1:05:42

and it's very interesting, but to a certain

1:05:44

point I can't get I can't get there.

1:05:46

But she's bankrolling your life, right.

1:05:50

But yeah, she's a bankrolling my life.

1:05:52

Do you like that feeling?

1:05:54

Oh, it's fantastic and.

1:05:55

It doesn't make you not be able to get it up for her?

1:06:00

Nope. I mean we're going on twice

1:06:02

in forty eight hours, so okay, that's

1:06:05

pretty good.

1:06:11

Wow, how do you how do you keep that?

1:06:13

I mean that's like you have the sexual appetite

1:06:15

of a teenager.

1:06:19

Well, it's really more on her. It's really more her

1:06:21

part. I mean, that's part of my job.

1:06:23

And you don't get defensive when she's like, come

1:06:26

have you come come in here right now? Look at this bathroom.

1:06:29

You don't get like defensive. And

1:06:31

you know cause I find when I when I approach

1:06:33

it that way, I get a lot of look at

1:06:35

your bathroom.

1:06:36

You do it too.

1:06:36

You didn't say it nice?

1:06:38

You know this is music.

1:06:40

I can't.

1:06:40

I'd be a fool to then push

1:06:42

back because then it's like, well,

1:06:45

like on the flip side of that, she I could then

1:06:47

say, well, look at my paycheck, how

1:06:49

about yours? Like, if I can't compete,

1:06:52

then I've got to I've got to own my sector.

1:06:54

Smart. I like your attitude.

1:06:57

Thank you. Oh there's

1:06:59

my daughter now. I guess I gotta go.

1:07:01

All right, by Thanks.

1:07:02

It's nice talking to you later.

1:07:03

You too. Wow. I like his priorities, he said,

1:07:06

that's yeah, he's good.

1:07:07

He's good at what he does.

1:07:09

See.

1:07:09

I wonder if I could get it up for a guy like that.

1:07:14

Get it up. We

1:07:19

need a call that is riveting. We

1:07:21

need a crazy yarn to be spun.

1:07:24

We need something this this podcast.

1:07:26

We're kind of rambling here about how

1:07:29

you keep your household afloat. I don't

1:07:31

know. We're waiting for that call that changes

1:07:33

the game.

1:07:34

All right, Well I'm pretty organized.

1:07:36

Oh my heart beating. I love you guys so much.

1:07:38

Oh my god, I was gonna get get

1:07:40

out.

1:07:48

I don't know. I've got something for you because.

1:07:50

Actually I love Natasha.

1:07:52

I love your podcast too.

1:07:54

Thank you, The endlesseningmon Podcast with my husband

1:07:56

Mosha Casher. Although everyone knows I could do it

1:07:58

myself.

1:08:00

Amen.

1:08:02

Well, you're both kind of echo.

1:08:04

I knew you had your General Mills raft the other day

1:08:06

oh yeah, no, force of nature.

1:08:08

That's my Plug's like an eco

1:08:11

friendly disinfectant. I don't

1:08:13

know if it works. I'm gonna chemist sun and love it.

1:08:15

Okay, force of nature.

1:08:16

Force of nature.

1:08:18

I don't know.

1:08:18

It' supposed to be non toxic. Okay, let me think of a

1:08:21

riveting story.

1:08:22

You haven't even tried this, and this is your tip.

1:08:26

Yeah? Is that right? You

1:08:28

haven't tried force of nature?

1:08:31

No, I have.

1:08:32

I love it, but I don't know if it actually works.

1:08:34

What does that mean?

1:08:35

I mean like they say it works, they say it's a disinfected

1:08:37

but who knows. I work at a spot, so whenever I

1:08:40

work there, I still go back to lifeyl and just.

1:08:42

Oh, tell me something, tell me any

1:08:45

secret internal workings

1:08:47

of a spot I work in.

1:08:49

So I'm an aesthetician, so I do skincare

1:08:51

and like waxing and things like that. We're

1:08:53

a lot more chill. But it's the hairstylists that are crazy.

1:08:55

They're so bitchy.

1:08:58

Yeah, my hair is.

1:09:00

I have a good spa story actually, okay, okay,

1:09:03

I'm not the best spas. I'm not the best storyteller.

1:09:05

But one time, when I was just

1:09:08

out of school, I was working at a salon in Boston,

1:09:11

and I was a really new esthetician, and so

1:09:13

I was comfortable with like a bikini,

1:09:15

wax or this or that. But we had

1:09:17

this ninety year old woman, ninety

1:09:20

years old walk in and

1:09:22

she did not speak English, and

1:09:25

she wanted a full Brazilian wax.

1:09:28

Wow, that's I know.

1:09:30

I gave it to her. But the whole time

1:09:33

she had such bad ingrowns that as they came

1:09:35

out and were extracted, they filled

1:09:37

up the room and it smelled so horrible.

1:09:39

Oh, the ingrown hairs

1:09:41

smelled suck this.

1:09:44

Yeah, it happened.

1:09:46

Ough, that is disgusting.

1:09:48

I know.

1:09:49

I have to say I used to have those

1:09:51

and I don't anymore. And I don't know what happened.

1:09:54

Do you miss them? Ever? I

1:09:58

don't.

1:09:59

I'm actually thrilled that they just

1:10:01

went away. I don't know why.

1:10:03

I must have done something, but maybe

1:10:06

change a razor, get a wax, something different.

1:10:08

I know I could never get a wax. I don't have time

1:10:11

for that. Although I didn't once get a

1:10:13

bikini at the airport,

1:10:15

and I was like, this, if I could do this every

1:10:17

time, because you know, it was like an international flight,

1:10:19

you're trying to kill two hours, perfect

1:10:21

time for a wax.

1:10:23

That's true. I always think about opening up like a massage

1:10:26

something there, because you know, when you're stressed out and.

1:10:28

You just want to relax.

1:10:29

It likes delayed.

1:10:30

I feel like it would make the money.

1:10:31

I have a question for you since your on hairdressers.

1:10:34

My hairdresser told me this is kind of a hot

1:10:36

tip that blondes don't

1:10:38

like each other. Do you think that's true?

1:10:40

Blonde like blonde women.

1:10:42

Yeah, like they have like a secret, like they don't keep

1:10:44

other blonde women as friends.

1:10:46

That is not true. That is

1:10:48

not true.

1:10:49

I literally the whole season used

1:10:51

to say that. You were like, I don't trust blonde women, and

1:10:53

I was kind of with you on that. A net

1:10:56

brough nettes through and through, I feel like, yeah,

1:10:58

I'm with you.

1:10:59

If my movie I literally

1:11:01

cast all brunettes to the point where I

1:11:03

was like, this is like disconcerting,

1:11:06

like everyone looks like siblings because I

1:11:09

just I'm not drawn to the blondes

1:11:12

and neither. But

1:11:14

I have to say that's not true because I literally

1:11:17

was at a restaurant the other day and like six

1:11:19

blonde ladies all done up, came out to

1:11:21

dinner, and I was.

1:11:22

Just like, maybe they secretly

1:11:24

hate each other. Maybe, but they just

1:11:26

don't think of brunettes as actual You

1:11:29

know what.

1:11:29

Else is possible? Your dumbass hairdresser

1:11:32

is wrong.

1:11:34

Oh he's not around anymore, so thanks

1:11:36

for reminding me, Chelse. He

1:11:38

did die of what drugs?

1:11:40

Oh?

1:11:40

Oh man, sorry, you can cut this out?

1:11:43

No, hold on. That's

1:11:46

the perfect way to memorialize.

1:11:48

I do miss him, though he didn't

1:11:50

know how to. I didn't know how to cut my scents.

1:11:52

Crazy, did you cry?

1:11:55

We had kind of lost touch, as you do with people

1:11:57

who are on drugs. Well they come

1:11:59

up, you know. I would get like knocks on my

1:12:01

door, like can I just please have twenty dollars?

1:12:04

I just I just need it please.

1:12:05

He's like, let me give you highlight. Let me give

1:12:08

you one highlight, one strand

1:12:10

of highlight.

1:12:12

But I do feel like I owe my career to him because

1:12:14

he cut bangs and put extensions on me like

1:12:16

three years into Hollywood and then I was like, oh, now

1:12:18

my hair doesn't look like absolute shit.

1:12:21

And I was gonna say, you are known for the bank.

1:12:23

That's crazy, that is

1:12:25

a huge loss.

1:12:26

Then yeah, we actually I

1:12:28

know him from childhood, but anyway, I

1:12:30

love him. He's up there, and you know what, he died

1:12:33

like the day before COVID hit,

1:12:35

and I was like, you know, I think

1:12:37

some and so did Ramdas, And

1:12:40

I'm like, I feel like it's so lucky that some

1:12:42

people. No, maybe it was before

1:12:44

Trump got elected. I just feel like the

1:12:46

people who got to die before like everything

1:12:49

kind of like started the downward

1:12:51

like trajectory. What would

1:12:54

it be called, not trajectory, the downward plunge.

1:12:58

It's kind of lucky.

1:12:59

Yeah.

1:12:59

If I so far from my whole

1:13:02

time on Earth, had to pick a time to die,

1:13:04

it would have been right before Trump.

1:13:05

Yeah, right, because it was like everything

1:13:08

just kind of like you're like, oh wait this

1:13:10

yeah, and it's gonna get wild. So

1:13:14

we need you, Chelse.

1:13:16

I have a question.

1:13:18

Okay, I'm turning thirty in five

1:13:20

days. What's your best advice for your thirties? Sorryest

1:13:22

Witch is so quick from the hairdresser drug

1:13:24

story.

1:13:25

No, honestly, I mean I've said this and I'll say

1:13:27

it again. I think the thirties

1:13:30

are great. It's the forties you want to watch

1:13:32

out for.

1:13:33

Why.

1:13:35

I just think the thirties you're like getting better

1:13:38

at what you do. But you're still kind of young

1:13:40

and hot, but you're just more powerful, you're

1:13:42

smarter, You're not like a dumb kid in your

1:13:45

twenties, you know, but your

1:13:47

forties it's just like, oh, we're just

1:13:49

about wrapping up.

1:13:51

I do not share a Chelsea's view on that.

1:13:53

I have to say, yeah,

1:13:56

I think you're got a kid in your forties.

1:13:57

I had a kid in my forties. I got married in my forties.

1:14:00

I think that's because for Natasha, she's gonna

1:14:03

age like Hepburn, but I'm

1:14:05

gonna age like Streisand.

1:14:07

You know, it's like you're both gorgeous icons.

1:14:10

Thank you one advice.

1:14:11

I love you. I am so obsessed with both

1:14:13

of you. I am a number one fan of both of your

1:14:16

podcasts. You don't even know.

1:14:18

This is.

1:14:20

Wish.

1:14:22

I'm gonna.

1:14:25

Hello, this is Burbank.

1:14:29

Chel I

1:14:32

miss Bourbank Podiatry. Honestly, in

1:14:35

total honesty, Burbank Podiatry

1:14:38

has ghosted me. I need to

1:14:40

go in there and get my feet looked at.

1:14:42

To stay in their call log I don't

1:14:44

read them.

1:14:45

Through the cold.

1:14:46

With all your voicemail, I don't get

1:14:48

those.

1:14:49

I don't get those heartfelt voicemails.

1:14:51

Anymore. Let's hear it one more time.

1:14:53

Hello, this is Burbank wishing

1:14:57

Chelsey a happy birthday.

1:15:00

Imagine whoever like authorized

1:15:02

that robo call. They're like, you know,

1:15:05

nic, Yeah, let's send this to everyone on

1:15:07

their birthday. It's like it's gonna make a differ.

1:15:10

They're not known for their humor. I mean, I don't think anyone

1:15:12

caught it. It's like going to the ess.

1:15:14

I'm always the funniest.

1:15:15

Do you know that pediatrists are the That's

1:15:17

what you can if you get the lowest, lowest

1:15:20

score from medical school, that's

1:15:22

what you're able to do.

1:15:24

Yeah, that's a diary. I asked me I have

1:15:26

feet or low on the body?

1:15:27

Yeah, oh maybe, or it's just not that involved.

1:15:31

My advice to you, first of all, it's rude

1:15:33

to say you're old when you're thirty because there's

1:15:35

a lot of people who might look really great.

1:15:37

But don't don't take this on the caller. Don't

1:15:40

takesty.

1:15:41

So don't ever say you're old. And also, age

1:15:43

is like just imagine yourself thinking

1:15:46

you're twenty seven all the time. That's what

1:15:48

I do. Uh So it's kind of like in

1:15:50

your mind age.

1:15:52

Listen when I was twenty eight. I was like, it's

1:15:54

over. I'm thirty, and that's kind of how

1:15:56

I feel now. I'm like, wow, I'm like mid forties.

1:15:59

I'm like, I'm basic fifty, which

1:16:01

is crazy.

1:16:02

Well, I was listening to this Catherine I watched this Katherine

1:16:04

Ryan show. I forgot what it was called. It's on Netflix,

1:16:06

but there was a character had a line and she said,

1:16:09

your fifties are your like your twenties with money.

1:16:12

And I always think of that and I and it

1:16:14

is true, like you're gonna get more money, Like I

1:16:17

was able to stop waitressing at thirty

1:16:19

and then finally like follow my career.

1:16:21

And I just think it's like, I.

1:16:23

Guess it's I was like, why wouldn't that be your forties,

1:16:25

But I guess your fifties. The money

1:16:28

is that your kids are out of the house, so then you can have

1:16:30

more freedom again. But with us, we're

1:16:34

gonna be eighty by the time our kids are grown up,

1:16:36

because we had kids when we were on the precipice

1:16:38

of geriatric I mean,

1:16:40

you'll keep you young disability.

1:16:42

That is a little annoying to think that I'm going to be

1:16:44

sixty.

1:16:48

But then think about j Loo's age, Right, what did

1:16:50

we say she is fifty five? Yeah, thirty

1:16:52

four, so you could be like looking like j

1:16:54

Loo.

1:16:54

I don't know what she's doing. That olive oil is not her

1:16:57

secret. She's doing other things.

1:16:58

Oh I hate when these girls say this girl.

1:17:00

I was telling Chelsea this. I saw this girl she looked

1:17:03

so amazing backstage at a show, and

1:17:05

I asked her what her secret was, and then

1:17:07

she was like, I'll DM you. She

1:17:09

DMS me that she eats

1:17:12

avocados. That bitch.

1:17:14

It's like, you couldn't say that to my face. She's

1:17:18

like, she goes, I'm not gonna She's

1:17:20

like, I don't want to look in your eyes while I lied to

1:17:23

you.

1:17:23

And then Julia Luis Dreyfist I

1:17:26

read a whole expose of her because she also

1:17:28

looks good. She said her secret is

1:17:30

ivory soap hell no billionaire

1:17:33

bitch. She's ah, I'm a huge

1:17:36

fan of her.

1:17:38

People, you're not a fan of.

1:17:40

I'm just saying that is just like I just think

1:17:42

that there's no way out. Hey, I told Chelsea

1:17:44

where I got my jumpsuit. I'm telling all of you my go

1:17:47

to lipstick color on this episode.

1:17:49

And everyone's had work done in Hollywood. I

1:17:51

would I would venture to say, there's almost

1:17:53

no one who hasn't.

1:17:55

I have extensions. I would give you my extension

1:17:57

guy's number, but he dies has extension.

1:18:00

So yeah.

1:18:01

No, I mean I'm as a holistic esthetician,

1:18:03

like ninety percent of aging.

1:18:05

It's a key.

1:18:07

Yeah.

1:18:07

Okay, so diet and lifestyle it is a huge thing.

1:18:09

But like that avocado or olive

1:18:11

oil, it's bs you have to be doing other things.

1:18:14

No, but I will say I do love olive oil

1:18:16

on my body as my lotion. It's

1:18:18

a great hack. My esthetician

1:18:20

who I think Chelsea goes to. She gave it to me as

1:18:22

well. Here's what you do. Let me tell you really quick. You put

1:18:24

olive oil the XX whatever is like

1:18:26

the best one you can buy in one of those pumpers.

1:18:29

And then you put any

1:18:31

kind of like essential oils you like. And

1:18:33

I think I have it down to like forty

1:18:35

lavender God the collar hung hop

1:18:38

forty hello drops of lavender,

1:18:40

thirty drops of vanilla. I don't know our

1:18:43

jasmine. I'll switch it up sometimes. It's

1:18:45

amazing. You should do it. I think

1:18:47

the olive oil on the skin is an actual hack.

1:18:49

We lost that call you know, I

1:18:51

like to put a little olive oil and then I put

1:18:54

a little garlic in the pan and I stick my

1:18:56

ass in it, and I sizzle

1:18:58

my ass up in the gar like olive

1:19:00

oil, and it's just delicious.

1:19:04

I think that people probably learned

1:19:06

a lot, you know. That's the thing I noticed on our podcast

1:19:09

too, unless Honeymoon podcast. It's all young

1:19:11

people. They really need advice.

1:19:14

Yeah, and they don't have parents.

1:19:16

But it's good to be, you know, giving

1:19:19

some wisdom.

1:19:20

What wisdom have we really shared, though.

1:19:26

I know there's some in there for sure.

1:19:29

Well, one thing I will say, this is my only hack since

1:19:31

we did do the hack topic. This

1:19:33

is very popular in Hollywood. Joo

1:19:35

for a reason. Jow refresher. Okay,

1:19:38

it's a hand sanitizer. It smells like a lavender.

1:19:40

It's expensive, but it lasts.

1:19:42

Yeah, this is fourteen dollars. Oh that's

1:19:44

it. There's the barcode. You can scan it. Okay,

1:19:50

So here's the life hack. I did

1:19:52

not know this. I forgot. This is a life

1:19:54

hack for actors working actors on

1:19:57

set only. Okay, so noone

1:20:00

else disengage right now.

1:20:01

You can get you out online and it smells amazing.

1:20:04

Their money.

1:20:04

Okay, you forget your deodorant. No, it's for

1:20:06

anyone. If you forget your deodorant when you're

1:20:08

going to work and you have this hand sanitizer,

1:20:11

it can be sprayed directly on your pits. It

1:20:13

is made as a deodorant. It actually

1:20:15

says that on the bottle. I

1:20:18

didn't know that. I always care that, and like

1:20:20

at Brooklyn nine nine, for example, I would forget

1:20:22

my deodorant certain days, and you're there for twelve

1:20:25

hours often. And it was a

1:20:27

game change when someone told me that, Oh my god, the last

1:20:29

dregs of a caller coming in. Hello

1:20:31

dregs.

1:20:34

Hey it's healthy.

1:20:37

Mm hm, oh

1:20:40

my god. You actually answered the plane. Yeah,

1:20:46

oh my name is really.

1:20:47

Nice to meet you.

1:20:51

Nice to meet you too. We're talking about life acts,

1:20:53

but really, honestly, no one has had any, do

1:20:55

you. Oh

1:20:59

h h yeah, you know, so I

1:21:03

have one.

1:21:04

Try to be born in Paris?

1:21:07

Amen? Amen? Yeah,

1:21:13

all right, cool, I can't. I

1:21:16

can't. Was that was giving all of

1:21:18

our vibes.

1:21:18

He was so excited.

1:21:21

Hello, depend on that.

1:21:22

Hello, Oh oh

1:21:24

hey, chelse Hi, how are you?

1:21:27

Oh my god, I feel like I'm just calling a friend.

1:21:30

All right, Maybe you will be a

1:21:32

friend of the show. We really need

1:21:35

you to save us here, honey. We need a good

1:21:37

call. Like you know, the last episode

1:21:40

we had someone who was savagely attacked

1:21:43

by a dog at a dinner party and sent

1:21:45

to the er. We need something of that caliber.

1:21:48

Okay, Okay, Hi Nasaga, Hi,

1:21:51

how are you.

1:21:52

Let's get down to it.

1:21:53

Great, Okay,

1:21:56

let's see. I don't

1:21:58

have maybe an animal attack per

1:22:00

se. Okay, but

1:22:02

I kind of want to hear your thoughts about like you're

1:22:06

both happily well, I think happily

1:22:08

married.

1:22:09

I can assume yeah, we're married.

1:22:16

Okay, So do you guys have sex.

1:22:18

Dreams of others?

1:22:23

No?

1:22:23

Thank you? No, thank

1:22:25

you? No thank

1:22:28

you?

1:22:28

I mean I will I will answer that and

1:22:30

say that seems very normal.

1:22:33

Yes, well yeah no, I mean like

1:22:36

it's it's really fun and like exciting.

1:22:40

Right, my husband gets

1:22:42

like offended. I'm like, it's my dream.

1:22:45

I mean, I wouldn't tell my husband gets

1:22:47

to it sucks last night in

1:22:49

my dream. I

1:22:53

would feel really bad if if

1:22:55

Mosha told me who he had a fuck

1:22:58

dream about.

1:22:58

Yeah, and it was like someone that you see all

1:23:01

the time.

1:23:02

Yeah, there's no need, no

1:23:04

need. Okay, noted, No, I mean

1:23:06

you should definitely have them, but I

1:23:09

think there's no need to share personally unless

1:23:11

you think it's going to turn you on.

1:23:14

Yeah, okay, yeah, I think it's just that

1:23:16

I get I wake up like from the

1:23:19

dream and I don't even realize maybe I'm

1:23:21

speaking about it.

1:23:23

I mean, it would be fun, right if he thought it

1:23:25

was like fun and whatever

1:23:27

to talk about. But if he doesn't, then what's what's

1:23:30

the point?

1:23:31

Yeah?

1:23:31

Exactly, Okay, next

1:23:34

thing I

1:23:37

wrote, I wrote a lot of notes because

1:23:39

I know how Chelsea gets.

1:23:41

Well listen, it's not.

1:23:42

Just like I want to say, like I was gonna

1:23:44

say, it's not just like a personality quirk,

1:23:47

but actually it kind of is impatience

1:23:50

and boredom. But on the other hand,

1:23:52

it is that, Like the problem is if

1:23:54

I just chit chat and people are

1:23:56

like nothing saying nothing,

1:23:59

people are like this is boring. So I

1:24:01

do it for you. I'm a people pleaser.

1:24:05

No, no, I get it, I get it.

1:24:06

I want to say.

1:24:07

I also doodle a lot of heart.

1:24:09

Wow. Wow, isn't it

1:24:11

a It's a living hell. I can't

1:24:13

stop.

1:24:15

I do flowers and stars.

1:24:17

Ever, I do do stars

1:24:20

sometimes do do we

1:24:25

gotta fix this, We

1:24:28

gotta fix this. In the English language,

1:24:30

I do do that. It's like there's

1:24:33

got to be a way around that. In the English

1:24:35

language.

1:24:35

It's a in Shakespeare's classes.

1:24:38

When I was an acting student, they would

1:24:40

always say, do you don't say

1:24:42

you do?

1:24:43

Yeah? Tour with you?

1:24:45

Do you?

1:24:45

I always remember you saying that you learned to

1:24:47

say tour when.

1:24:49

You're really yeah, I don't remember that.

1:24:51

Recently, my friend told me that I say both

1:24:54

with L in it, and he is

1:24:56

he shouldn't really stop saying that.

1:24:58

My mom says melt that's

1:25:00

bad, and syrup, booth

1:25:03

and buffet like she says buffet

1:25:06

like a French fancy word, befit.

1:25:08

How do you say the bunch of flowers bouquet?

1:25:12

Yeah?

1:25:13

I used to say bouquet.

1:25:14

Okay, bocai. That

1:25:18

sounds like someone being like mochai girl,

1:25:21

like a goofy variety show

1:25:23

host.

1:25:24

And you know it's supposed to be d class a according

1:25:26

to Emily, I thought it was day class. See

1:25:28

exactly, day class a is

1:25:31

the word drapes. You're just supposed to

1:25:33

say curtains.

1:25:34

Drapes is kind of tacky, really now,

1:25:37

see, I could get into drawing cubes.

1:25:38

I guess, yeah, that's what I do.

1:25:40

But it's all hell, it's

1:25:42

like what I need. I need a scientist

1:25:44

to call in about the science of doodling. Someone

1:25:47

said, it's good for you to doodle.

1:25:48

Oh, I'm sure everything, but you really give

1:25:50

into it like I would doodle.

1:25:52

But well, especially when no one else

1:25:54

is here, I just get like I need.

1:25:56

I think.

1:25:56

It's like I'm so fidgety, Like do you

1:25:59

find that if you go to a like I have so

1:26:01

much trouble sitting still for a whole movie.

1:26:03

And also yes, I do too. And also it's

1:26:06

so uncomfortable. There's no foot rest, Like I

1:26:08

was in the front row the other night seeing Poor Things

1:26:11

and there was no foot rest. It was

1:26:13

like too small of a seat, it's cold, I'm

1:26:15

in my jacket and my uncomfortable shoes,

1:26:17

Like what is this is.

1:26:18

Actually providing some insight into why

1:26:21

streamers have been so successful, because.

1:26:23

It's like, Okay, my dog's not there,

1:26:25

right, Like you can watch.

1:26:26

A movie at home on your couch with all your blankets

1:26:29

and shit, why would you go put on jeans

1:26:31

and sit in a movie theater creaky ass

1:26:33

dirty chair where someone's gonna come gun

1:26:36

you down. It's like you might

1:26:38

as well just.

1:26:40

Stay home down, I mean tossy.

1:26:44

Shelf shells.

1:26:47

Hey, oh wait, have either of you been to Alamo

1:26:50

Theater.

1:26:51

Alamo Draft House.

1:26:53

Yeah, I've played there.

1:26:54

When I perform there, it's kind of echoey.

1:26:56

They have like the reclining chairs,

1:26:58

so it's really comfort.

1:27:00

Well, it wasn't comfortable for me on stage because

1:27:02

someone was shouting to me they wanted a refund

1:27:04

or something. Are you kidding?

1:27:06

I never had good shows there.

1:27:07

I had a bad show there. I only went there one weekend

1:27:09

or something, and I

1:27:12

was like, I guess this is Virginia, isn't it like

1:27:14

in Virginia DC.

1:27:15

It's in Arlington.

1:27:16

They're all over.

1:27:18

Oh there is really, do you think?

1:27:20

So?

1:27:20

Yeah?

1:27:21

I live near it.

1:27:23

Really no, you're a figment of our imagination

1:27:26

and that place does not and hasn't ever existed.

1:27:29

Well, there's also Look Cinemas where you can

1:27:31

like get some roasted chicken

1:27:33

while you eat.

1:27:34

But you go, look, you're gonna need a better

1:27:36

menu for this angle. Okay,

1:27:40

Yeah, I don't know. I do just think like the

1:27:42

one thing about comedies that I miss because

1:27:45

now there's just no comedies in theaters.

1:27:47

Hardly ever is laughing

1:27:49

with a group of people. I mean that that

1:27:52

kind of makes up for the discomfort, right,

1:27:54

But it's like, when's the last time you were in a packed

1:27:57

theater cracking up at a comedy movie?

1:28:00

Remember? I saw that Mariah Carey movie Butterfly.

1:28:02

Is that what it was called?

1:28:05

Glitter?

1:28:05

Glitter? Yes, glitter? Sorry, time

1:28:10

ago. And I just remember when she got

1:28:12

like someone hit her or

1:28:14

something, and the whole audience cheered and was like

1:28:16

screaming at her, and it was it

1:28:19

was an odd experience.

1:28:21

Fun fact is that I actually cried and glitter

1:28:23

really yeah, her mom was like homeless

1:28:26

or something, right, and I cried.

1:28:28

I also cried in Short Circuit too interesting.

1:28:33

And when I saw

1:28:35

Terms of Endearment with my mom when they

1:28:37

started like having sex or getting intimate,

1:28:39

she left the theater.

1:28:41

And then that movie is so good theaters?

1:28:44

Yes, what year was that?

1:28:46

I was young?

1:28:47

I don't know.

1:28:49

I'm old because

1:28:51

I've only seen that movie like in recent

1:28:53

but I saw it recently and it was like it made

1:28:55

me cry again.

1:28:56

It's so good.

1:28:57

That's why I rewatched it because I was like, wow,

1:28:59

this movie is so good, and also being a mom

1:29:01

and seeing their connection.

1:29:03

Yeah, no, it is so good that kind of acting

1:29:06

and just the look of that movie and like the storytelling

1:29:09

where it's just so rangy and.

1:29:10

Jack Nicholson is so good and she's solo.

1:29:13

And the parenting style in that era where

1:29:15

it just feels like the kids are kind of running all around.

1:29:19

It's not so precious as now, Like as you're

1:29:21

talking about all these specialists parents

1:29:23

telling you how to raise your kid, like, right,

1:29:26

I always kind of go back to, like, come on, can't

1:29:28

there be just a ground level

1:29:30

of just common sense to all my decision

1:29:33

making? You know, does it really have

1:29:35

to be so expert driven and so.

1:29:38

Well we're all trying to overcorrect whatever

1:29:41

was happening to us, right, that's the problem,

1:29:43

right, which.

1:29:44

Was just blind raising of children.

1:29:46

Like can you imagine you just get a baby,

1:29:48

like anyone could just make a baby, and

1:29:51

then you just no instructions all right, off

1:29:53

you go. It's crazy.

1:29:54

I remember like trying to get above

1:29:56

water like a in ground

1:29:59

pool, like just like drowning, like almost

1:30:01

drowning until like and like just trying

1:30:03

to like get to the top.

1:30:04

To be like wait there was

1:30:06

no ladder.

1:30:07

No, it was like are what's those things above ground

1:30:10

pool you know, Like I just remember being in the center

1:30:12

of it. Yeah, like not being able to swim.

1:30:15

Like people, I almost drowned at camp. I

1:30:17

went to summer camp and there was this like you,

1:30:19

it was called rainbow pools, and you would jump

1:30:21

off this big ass rock. I think it was thirty

1:30:23

feet up and you jump off and

1:30:25

that was terrifying. And then like the waterfall

1:30:28

that there was a waterfall that would make

1:30:30

currents that would fatigue you because you'd

1:30:32

swim against the current, so you get tired

1:30:35

faster. And I remember my head going under

1:30:37

and just looking at the councilor on the bank and trying

1:30:39

to be like, hey, going under here, swimming.

1:30:42

Swimming is getting hard, and like I felt like they

1:30:44

were just waiting to make sure I was

1:30:46

drowning before they helped me. So

1:30:50

maybe it's good to have experts like don't let

1:30:52

your kids swim in a current. You

1:30:55

know, I don't know, but they're annoying as fuck.

1:30:57

And I

1:31:00

basically I don't want to follow anyone who

1:31:02

says they have all the answers. The only people

1:31:04

I want to listen to people is people

1:31:06

who who mitigate what they say with like

1:31:09

this might not work for you, or

1:31:11

there's lots of ways to do this, or

1:31:13

you have to go with your gut, you know, Like I

1:31:15

don't know. I just don't like anyone who

1:31:19

spiritually has all the answers don't

1:31:21

or who as a parent has

1:31:24

all the answers. That makes

1:31:26

me question you because I think the ultimate

1:31:28

knowledge is to know that you don't have all the

1:31:30

knowledge.

1:31:31

And then I was following this data DRMA person

1:31:34

and I get her newsletter? Are these

1:31:37

people on adderall? Like, I don't understand how people

1:31:39

can just like pump out a newsletter

1:31:41

like every single day. Yeah, but I'll read

1:31:43

these things and then it always

1:31:45

comes down to.

1:31:47

That would be funny though, That actually makes me want

1:31:49

to pump out a daily newsletter for my podcast.

1:31:53

I wonder how many people would sign up, Like I

1:31:55

if I just would just say, oh fuck, let me write

1:31:57

this daily email and I just like send a crazy

1:32:00

email every day, that would be funny.

1:32:03

It's like a little tiny morsel

1:32:05

of Internet, Like it's like would be instead

1:32:08

of Twitter. If I have a thought, I can fire

1:32:10

it off to the email list.

1:32:12

But the point is every single I've

1:32:14

stopped reading them because when I finally get to the

1:32:17

end. It's like data says, sometimes

1:32:19

it's good, sometimes it's bad. It's like it never

1:32:21

really gets you anywhere.

1:32:23

Well, there is stuff that data. Data

1:32:25

is data data. I don't know, but

1:32:29

I remember when I was trying to have a child,

1:32:31

like reading that acupuncture actually is

1:32:33

statistically helpful for pregnancy

1:32:36

outcomes.

1:32:36

And you told me that, and I think it helped me hatch

1:32:39

my only egg that I had, or only our.

1:32:41

Little only little babies. I mean, can you imagine

1:32:43

if our babies were hit by a car or something like? I

1:32:46

think about this though. It's like, you know, on a farm back

1:32:48

in the day, you'd have ten kids. One of them gets ran

1:32:50

over by the tractor. You're like, welp, we

1:32:53

still have someone to milk the cow, you know whatever.

1:32:55

I'm just like, it's terrifying to have an only

1:32:58

child.

1:32:58

I know.

1:32:59

Yeah, Well, I just try to always

1:33:02

imagine my child, my child's

1:33:04

children. But I feel bad because I'm always

1:33:07

trying to envision that, and I'm like, she's going to become

1:33:09

pregnant secon I.

1:33:10

Imagine my child's children begging

1:33:12

for water in the climate apocalypse, So.

1:33:15

Trying to walk to northern California.

1:33:18

Yeah, the water's risen to the center

1:33:21

of you know, the coast is gone, and we're

1:33:24

long dead because we would have been one hundred

1:33:26

and five at that point. Well,

1:33:30

thanks for tuning in.

1:33:34

I have to go eat something, all right. I

1:33:41

love how she pronounces your name,

1:33:45

Chelsea.

1:33:45

It's nice. Yeah, it's thoughtful. Like

1:33:48

there's a little thoughtful pause in there. All

1:33:50

right, listen, what an app I definitely

1:33:53

wanted to pat it a little bit in case

1:33:55

we want to cut anything. I think we've

1:33:57

done that.

1:33:59

Thanks Chell, Thanks Chelsea.

1:34:03

Natasha, friend of the pod. I

1:34:05

think we should do this more often.

1:34:07

I had a great time this is I

1:34:09

have to say this was funnier than

1:34:11

most of the episodes of my podcast. Wow,

1:34:14

this our podcast.

1:34:16

No, I actually I do love your podcast.

1:34:19

It's all you're one of the most requested

1:34:22

guests.

1:34:22

Will have me back. I would love to fill

1:34:25

in formotion while he's out of town.

1:34:26

Oh, that's a great idea.

1:34:27

Okay, and then we should also co

1:34:30

host Tim Heidecker's podcast too.

1:34:32

Oh, I'm doing it next week.

1:34:33

Do you want to come in? Yeah, let's

1:34:36

do everything together. We become totally

1:34:38

codependent at the end of this podcast. Yeah,

1:34:41

let's do everything together, and it's all podcasts.

1:34:43

Every day. We co host everyone's podcast.

1:34:48

This though is fun. I

1:34:51

think it's a great pod. Did

1:34:54

we figure anything out about life? What's a closing

1:34:56

thing we can give people?

1:35:01

I guess life is over at thirty, right?

1:35:03

What you want to do? That's where it kind of comes

1:35:06

down to. I'm trying to think, was there anything we learned

1:35:08

about households in this entire episode?

1:35:12

Fuck in a gay relationship?

1:35:14

I was gonna say that, but then I did

1:35:16

get the creeping feeling during that call

1:35:18

that if we talked in more thoroughness to

1:35:20

the other husband that he'd be

1:35:23

like, he's the problem. The

1:35:26

one we spoke to today I think might be the

1:35:28

dirty one.

1:35:29

But what about that guy who is like totally

1:35:31

wanting to like have sex with his wife and do

1:35:33

whatever she said, no matter what tone

1:35:35

was.

1:35:36

I'm not sure what I think about that guy. He

1:35:38

was talking about my shoulders for all of

1:35:40

long, and you know, I was like, I'm

1:35:43

just gonna.

1:35:43

Take this nice shoulders.

1:35:45

Thanks. I mean, you know, I was

1:35:47

like, you know, I'm gonna like I literally made a literal

1:35:49

choice to just say thank you. It's

1:35:52

like, at this point, I'll take any compliment I can

1:35:54

get because I feel like my my

1:35:57

great beauty left the building.

1:35:59

I don't think that's true, and I will say my takeaway.

1:36:02

My great beauty is also like such a self

1:36:04

compliment that's not really.

1:36:06

My takeaway from this podcast is your

1:36:09

fans are ardent and they

1:36:11

adore you and also

1:36:14

are completely at your

1:36:17

mercy. Mercy, Yes, they would do anything

1:36:19

for you, and they would subscribe to a daily newsletter.

1:36:22

I think I think you're off on any

1:36:24

topic.

1:36:25

What do you Can you make any money off that newsletter?

1:36:27

Also, is anyone going to ever fucking do ads

1:36:29

on my podcast? I'm sick of this shit. Okay,

1:36:32

look, I made a new kind of heart. It's

1:36:34

more bold, it's got a

1:36:36

little more like depth. And if I did

1:36:39

exercise enrichment program, this could

1:36:41

be one of the slides.

1:36:43

Well, I think that people would definitely

1:36:46

want to advertise on your podcast, but I'm

1:36:48

afraid for you to do. I can't imagine

1:36:50

you. I feel like if Chelsea didn't add

1:36:52