• Control is both a noun (the power to influence or direct people's behaviour or the course of events), and a verb (determine the behaviour or supervise the running of).....
• How "nice" people can control you..... sometimes without even consciously knowing that is what they are doing.
  • "I'm only raising this because I'm concerned about you".... which for teenagers it MAY be OK, but for adults it is not appropriate and is a form of shaming and trying to control someone else in doing what YOU think they should do....
• Then there is COERCIVE Control..... which causes trauma for individuals..... and our body holds the impact of a trauma by holding the energy of the trauma.....
  • Control is not WHO decides, but who decides who decides!  
• Control the controllable in our lives - fear is all around us, but much of it is outside our control.  By plugging into the "uncontrollable", it puts us in a place of helplessness, and even hopelessness, which leads to more cortisol being drip fed into our bodies.... not good! 

1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDNXKWvfCtY    Stop letting other people control your emotions
2. Accessing the Healing Power of the Vagus Nerve:  self help exercises for anxiety, depression, trauma and autism (Stanley Rosenberg)
3. Invisible Chains:  overcoming coercive control in your intimate relationship (Lisa Aronsen Fontes PhD.)
4. See What you Made Me Do (Jess Hill)
5. In An Unspoken Voice (Peter A Levine)
6. Complex PTSD:  From Surviving to Thriving (Pete Walker)
7. When The Body Says No:  The Cost of Hidden Stress (Dr Gabor Mate)

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