0:05

Are you a weary woman? Are

0:08

you married to a weary woman?

0:10

Do you have a friend who is weary?

0:13

Perhaps the reason for the weariness is

0:15

partly because of the expectations on

0:17

Christian women today.

0:20

Elise Fitzpatrick posted a question

0:22

on social media a while back. She

0:24

basically asked, what are the dumbest things

0:26

people tell women concerning how

0:28

to be godly? She thought

0:30

she'd get a few responses. She

0:33

was overwhelmed by the volume of response,

0:35

as well as the depth of the comments

0:38

and how they struck at the heart of the women

0:40

who answered. I want you to hear from

0:42

Elise today, because

0:45

it takes all of us working together to push back

0:47

against the errors concerning

0:49

what a godly woman really is.

0:51

I believe that, and we're going to talk

0:53

about it straight ahead on Chris Avery Live, the program

0:56

from the heart to the heart for the heart. And

0:58

my guess is somebody is going to feel less

1:01

alone today because of

1:03

this conversation. You can find out more

1:05

about our guest and resources we

1:07

have for you at the website. Chris Fabry

1:09

live. Org thanking our

1:11

team as we start. Ryan McConaughey doing all

1:13

things technical. Tricia's our producer in

1:15

the chair. Lisa will be answering

1:17

your calls today. This is our first

1:19

live broadcast for a week. I

1:22

was in Chicago last week, so

1:24

it's great to get back to my regular broadcast

1:26

chair. And I have to tell you,

1:28

I've been reading Glenna marshall's book,

1:30

Memorizing Scripture, and

1:32

it came across a passage in Ephesians

1:35

four that Glenna mentioned, and

1:37

I wrote it down. And I thought, you know,

1:40

I don't memorize as much anymore

1:42

because, you know, I've got it in my hand. I

1:45

can Google whatever, I can remember a couple of words

1:47

and get to the passage. But

1:49

I haven't memorized as much lately.

1:51

And I came to this in Ephesians four

1:54

and it says, I'll read it. You

1:56

know, I could close my eyes and try to do it. Bear

1:59

with one another in love,

2:01

eager to maintain the unity

2:04

of the spirit in the bond of

2:06

peace. And I

2:08

just ruminated that on

2:10

the in the airport and then on the airplane

2:13

and coming in and just allowing

2:15

those phrases to kind of wash over

2:17

me. And something happened.

2:19

It worked on me from the inside

2:22

out. But a lot of people today

2:24

say, hey, you don't know me. You don't know my brain.

2:26

I can't remember a whole lot of anything.

2:29

I want to send you a copy of Memorizing Scripture.

2:32

See if Glenn his words will motivate

2:34

you and give you

2:36

a vision. May hope

2:38

that you really can hide God's

2:40

Word in your heart, no matter what your age.

2:43

And that activity will

2:45

change the way you think. Change

2:48

the way you react in some ways

2:50

connect you with the real power source,

2:52

which is God himself. Call or click

2:54

through today. Chris. Chris. Favorite archive.org.

2:57

You can see it right there on

2:59

the homepage. Scroll down. You'll see

3:01

how to be a partner or friend with this Chris

3:04

Fabry live. Org or

3:06

call 86695538669532279.

3:13

This is our thank you and the month

3:15

of March which we're all

3:17

quickly getting on the other side of

3:20

down the middle of anyway. Okay.

3:22

You know what I mean. Elise Fitzpatrick

3:24

holds an Ma as certificate in biblical

3:26

counseling. She's written 25 books

3:29

or so on daily

3:31

living and the Christian life. She's a

3:33

frequent speaker at national conferences,

3:35

including the Called conference at

3:37

Moody on April

3:39

13th. We have a link to that conference

3:42

at her website. Chris. Favorite live

3:44

org? She's been married more than

3:46

40 years to Phil, three

3:48

adult children, six grandchildren.

3:51

She's joining us today from Escondido.

3:54

Elise, welcome to the program. How are you doing today?

3:57

I'm really well, Chris, thanks

3:59

so much for having me.

4:00

Do you agree with me about the power of

4:03

scripture memorization that I just talked about?

4:06

Absolutely, absolutely.

4:08

You know, it's interesting. I

4:11

have I do think

4:13

it's important to spend

4:15

time, um, in

4:18

certain passages seeking to

4:20

memorize them, make them

4:22

part of you. And,

4:25

and in addition to that,

4:27

just being in.

4:30

Scripture as much as you

4:32

can to just

4:34

let it permeate your

4:37

thought. You know, I've been I've

4:39

been a believer since 1971,

4:43

which makes me a little old. And,

4:46

um, and I've spent

4:49

pretty much every day.

4:51

Not every day, certainly, but pretty much

4:53

every day in Scripture and

4:55

memorizing Scripture

4:57

and just letting it,

5:00

listening to it, letting it

5:02

be part of

5:05

how I think. And,

5:07

you know, it's it's just so important,

5:09

I think, particularly now, because

5:11

there are so many voices

5:14

speaking to us, I

5:16

think particularly as women, um,

5:19

and we and we need to have

5:21

the truth embedded in our

5:23

hearts. And memorizing

5:26

it is a is a the

5:29

best way to do that? Yes.

5:31

Because you ruminate because it you

5:34

give the spirit something to work with. And and

5:37

you know, I've heard people say that, but

5:39

what you just said kind of puts

5:41

the finger on our topic today because

5:43

there's there's someone listening, there's a

5:45

woman listening who heard you say, I've been

5:47

memorizing, I've been in the word

5:50

every day for 50 plus years.

5:52

And she's going to say, oh, no, at least it's

5:54

going to tell me that I have to have an hour

5:56

quiet time. She's going to tell me that I've got to

5:58

memorize all of Romans and

6:01

Psalm 23, you know, etc. Elise

6:04

is going to give me a list about being a

6:06

godly woman. And that's exactly

6:09

the opposite of what you want to do. Um.

6:12

You know, it really is. And,

6:15

um, yeah, I've I've been

6:17

a Christian for more than 50 years,

6:19

but really,

6:21

getting to know Scripture

6:24

and getting to know the Lord

6:26

is not, um,

6:29

is not something that

6:31

I want to codify

6:34

by saying, okay, you need to spend an

6:36

hour a day in Scripture. Listen,

6:39

really, up until the last

6:41

maybe 100 years, uh,

6:43

most Christians didn't even have a

6:45

Bible. And

6:49

that's not to say that we shouldn't use

6:51

the Bible or have it be part

6:53

of our lives. We're so

6:55

immensely privileged. But obviously

6:58

there are people even today around

7:00

the world that don't have the

7:02

Bible. And so

7:04

then they they listen and

7:07

thank God. You know, I hate

7:09

to even say this, but thank God for the internet,

7:12

um, because people are

7:14

able to listen to Scripture

7:16

now in ways that they never have before.

7:19

But the thought that

7:21

and this is really what I'm trying

7:24

to get at, the thought that

7:26

if you don't spend an hour a day

7:28

in Scripture, um,

7:31

or you don't have a specific

7:33

quiet time every day

7:36

and listen, I read the Bible pretty

7:38

much every day, and

7:40

I have a have a time

7:42

with the Lord pretty much every day

7:45

and have had for 50 years,

7:47

um, that if

7:50

that if you don't do that somehow,

7:52

somehow you are less

7:55

than what God wants

7:57

you to be. And

7:59

so I think that

8:01

the message that women are

8:04

receiving is

8:06

a message that really

8:09

ends in condemnation

8:12

or them feeling guilty.

8:14

And, Chris, you know, you

8:16

don't ever want to be around

8:18

anybody that you know, disapproves of

8:20

you. Uh, I

8:22

used to I used to have an aunt

8:24

that I was I was pretty sure

8:27

she didn't really like me,

8:29

but my mother would say to me, go

8:31

visit Aunt Biddy. That wasn't her name.

8:33

But anyway, go visit Aunt Biddy.

8:36

Uh, because, you know, you should go see

8:38

her. And I didn't want to go

8:40

see her because I knew she disapproved.

8:43

Uh, you know, if we come to

8:45

quiet time or reading

8:47

scripture or memorizing scripture,

8:50

uh, because we think we're going to try

8:52

to earn God's affection

8:55

by doing it. Um,

8:58

then when we

9:00

when we don't do it enough.

9:02

And honestly, for my heart, it's

9:04

never enough. Um,

9:06

then we'll think that God is somehow disappointed

9:09

in us or disapproving

9:12

of us, and we won't want to be around

9:14

him. The thing that will make

9:16

us want to be around

9:18

the Lord is really

9:20

ruminating on and remembering

9:23

how he has loved us

9:25

in Christ and

9:28

called us already,

9:31

uh, perfectly forgiven

9:33

and perfectly obedient

9:35

because of the work of Jesus

9:38

Christ, His Son. And so

9:40

because of that, then I want

9:42

to be around him, and

9:44

I want to know His word, because

9:47

I know that

9:50

he loves me. And what he

9:52

has for me is is

9:54

good. You know, as a grandma,

9:58

um, my kids

10:00

know that I love them, my grandkids

10:03

to know that I love them and

10:05

they, I believe, want

10:07

to be around me probably more when they

10:09

were littler. Now that they're

10:11

all now that they're all teenagers are

10:13

older, maybe not so

10:15

much, but, uh,

10:17

they wanted to be around me because

10:19

they knew that if anybody

10:22

on the planet loved them, it was me.

10:25

See, we can tell people

10:27

you need to memorize scripture.

10:30

You need to pray. But you

10:32

know, if you think that God really doesn't

10:34

approve of you, or you're maybe

10:36

not working hard enough that he

10:38

would approve of you, if if

10:41

you think that you're not going to want to do

10:43

it, you can force yourself to do it, but

10:45

you're not going to want to.

10:46

Yes. So so

10:48

I want to ask you, as you listen to Elise

10:51

Fitzpatrick today, her

10:53

question was, what are the dumbest things people tell

10:55

women concerning how to be godly?

10:57

You want to answer that question? What

11:00

is the the misconception?

11:02

Or maybe you think, no, this is this

11:04

is what you've been told in order to be godly

11:06

and you've been on that treadmill.

11:09

I want you to call us today. (877) 548-3675.

11:14

What have you been told or what is that you're

11:16

you're concerned about? One

11:18

of the questions that Elise asked

11:20

in the video that I saw was, does your

11:23

Christianity feel like rest

11:25

for your soul, or

11:27

does it feel like another obligation?

11:30

Because Elise feels like there's an

11:32

awful lot of exhausted

11:34

women. And to talk about

11:36

the the called conference that she's

11:38

going to be speaking at, at Moody in April

11:41

is like you feel too exhausted to be called

11:43

to do anything more so

11:45

and you don't need that. I mean, that's what you

11:47

might think. I hope you call (877) 548-3675.

11:53

That's our number. Go to the website Chris Fabry

11:55

live org. You'll see

11:57

a featured resource there where you'll see

12:00

a link to

12:02

the called conference, a

12:04

book by Elise called worthy

12:07

Celebrating the Value

12:09

of Women. And if you

12:11

are weary, I want to let

12:13

you talk with at least today. (877) 548-3675.

12:29

Elise Fitzpatrick is joining us today at the Radio

12:31

Backyard Fence. She is one of the keynote

12:33

speakers at the Called conference is a one

12:35

day conference at Moody April

12:38

13th. And if you're in

12:40

the Midwest, be thinking about that.

12:43

Equipping Women in Ministry Leadership.

12:46

I wanted to have Elise on here today to talk about

12:48

that, that weariness

12:50

that a lot of women feel,

12:53

the treadmill that you're on

12:55

as as a wife and a mom

12:57

employee, you could be single,

12:59

you could be married. Uh, doesn't

13:01

matter. You can, but you can feel the expectation

13:04

that is growing. And maybe it's more

13:07

from inside that outside. I mean, we

13:09

have to deal with that. But

13:11

I wanted her to talk about the restiveness

13:14

that you want us to feel

13:16

or you want us to at least consider.

13:20

Um, but before we do that, answer

13:22

the question when you posted that question

13:24

on Facebook that, um, things people

13:26

say about what a godly woman

13:28

is or does, what

13:31

was the response that you received?

13:34

You know, thank you for that.

13:36

Um, I was really I was really kind

13:38

of shocked and, uh, I

13:40

mean, I ended up receiving,

13:43

uh, hundreds, if not thousands

13:45

of responses from women

13:47

across the country. And really pretty

13:50

quickly, um, I

13:52

mean, everything from decorate

13:54

your home so that it looks like a

13:56

magazine to

13:58

making your own laundry detergent

14:02

so that, you know, you're sure you're washing

14:05

your, uh, your family's

14:07

clothes in organic,

14:10

um, suds. Yes.

14:12

To, uh, to having,

14:14

you know, this hourlong quiet time every

14:16

day or, um,

14:18

making sure that your voice

14:21

is always moderated

14:23

so that you are

14:25

you are quiet. Um,

14:28

all of those things I mean, just

14:30

some of them were

14:33

shocking, you know, like, never, never

14:35

admit that you're struggling because that

14:37

means that you're not trusting God

14:40

or obeying the Lord,

14:42

or don't ever be transparent

14:45

about about the way you

14:47

about the way you struggle. Um,

14:50

on the other hand, there's things like,

14:53

um, do all the things that

14:55

you're supposed to be doing for the Lord,

14:57

and then he'll give you whatever

15:00

it is that you're desiring, the

15:02

desire of your heart,

15:04

which, you know, of course, all

15:06

of this, every bit of it

15:08

is really part of

15:10

this moralistic system

15:13

which which says that

15:15

if you live in a certain way,

15:19

um, and however you want to

15:21

define that from the silliness of,

15:23

you know, growing your own,

15:25

growing your own wheat, and if you want to do that,

15:27

do that, that's great. Or,

15:30

uh, you know, all the way to

15:32

never, never correcting,

15:35

uh, your husband. Um,

15:38

I all, all of that,

15:40

you know, being quiet all

15:42

the time is really simply

15:45

a way to try to

15:47

earn God's favor.

15:50

And all of that

15:52

really flies in the face

15:55

of the gospel and what Jesus

15:57

Christ has done. You know,

15:59

we don't have to earn

16:02

God's favor. We already

16:04

have God's favor

16:06

because of the perfect

16:09

life, death, and

16:11

resurrection of Jesus Christ.

16:14

So it's folly.

16:17

And honestly, it just

16:19

will exhaust us

16:21

to try to earn

16:23

God's favor when we already

16:26

have it. Yes, but then also

16:29

our our hearts are never

16:31

are never going to be satisfied that

16:33

we've done enough. And,

16:36

um, and then of course, whenever we,

16:39

whenever we face difficulties

16:42

suffering of any kind, that

16:44

kind of thought that

16:46

you have to earn God's favor will then

16:48

come back around and say to you, see,

16:51

God is mad at you. That's why you're suffering.

16:54

So we want

16:56

to encourage women

16:59

and and women who believe

17:01

that they're called to help other

17:03

women. And that's one of the things we'll be doing

17:05

at the Called conference. But we

17:07

want to encourage women to

17:09

know that their confidence

17:11

is in the Lord and what

17:13

he has done, not

17:15

in themselves and what

17:18

they can do in order to perfect themselves

17:20

or their ministry to others.

17:23

But the the more comfortable

17:26

controlling way to live

17:28

is. Is the quid pro quo.

17:30

If I do this, God's going to do that.

17:32

And so then people walk away from their

17:34

faith because God didn't do that. And I thought I

17:36

did this. And so, you know, we

17:39

call him on the bargain that we made,

17:41

but he didn't, you know,

17:43

and and so and then we try

17:45

to figure it out. Well, what what did

17:48

I do wrong here. There's a there's another one you mentioned

17:50

in the video. If your children misbehave,

17:53

it's because you don't have enough faith. You

17:55

know, if you're if life goes off the rails

17:57

with your kids in some way,

18:00

you're the problem. And sometimes

18:02

parents, you know, parents are

18:04

culpable for things that they'd done

18:06

for the decisions they make. Absolutely.

18:09

But your children's lives are

18:11

their lives, and they have to make their own decisions

18:13

and find their own way. And for you to

18:16

then take the responsibility of that

18:18

and live under the condemnation, like you were saying

18:20

of that is an exhausting,

18:23

soul stealing

18:25

proposition, isn't it?

18:27

Absolutely. And I think particularly

18:30

for parents, because so

18:32

much has been

18:34

said about the things

18:37

that parents should and

18:39

should not do, that

18:41

would, in essence, assure

18:44

them that their children

18:46

would become, you know, super

18:49

star believers. Um,

18:51

and I know that when my kids were

18:53

young and they're, they're all in their 40s

18:55

and 50s now, but when my kids were

18:58

young, I really felt like

19:00

there was if I could just be a

19:02

good enough parent, my husband

19:04

could just be a good enough parent.

19:07

Then our children would

19:09

serve the Lord. And honestly,

19:11

thankfully, and not because of anything

19:13

I did. Uh, out of sheer

19:15

grace. My kids do love the Lord,

19:18

but, um, I,

19:21

I know that I really

19:23

drove them because

19:25

I was afraid that

19:28

they were not going to be

19:31

the kind of the kind of people

19:33

I hoped that they would be. And

19:35

I've talked to parents, really, across

19:38

the country who carry

19:40

so much guilt and

19:43

shame because their

19:45

children, um, that they

19:48

raised hopefully

19:50

they fought to serve the Lord

19:52

have have turned their back on

19:54

the Lord. And what I wanted,

19:56

what I want to say to

19:58

to parents who have kids

20:00

in the home right now is,

20:03

um, you're

20:06

not you're not responsible for your

20:08

children's salvation. And I say that

20:10

to parents whose kids are out of

20:12

the home. There is only one

20:14

person who's responsible

20:17

for your children's salvation. Salvation

20:20

belongs to the Lord.

20:22

And, um, so

20:24

that's something that the Lord has to

20:26

do by his spirit.

20:29

And he may or may

20:31

not use the

20:33

work you do with your kids.

20:35

And honestly, I think we exhaust

20:38

them and we exhaust

20:40

ourselves always

20:42

trying to look through what they're doing,

20:44

what they're saying, trying to

20:47

assure ourselves that we're doing the right thing.

20:49

Parenting is just one of those

20:51

one of the many, many

20:53

areas where where

20:55

women are just exhausted.

20:57

Yes. Um, I want to go

20:59

back to something you just said a minute ago about

21:02

struggle, though, that the

21:04

one of the things that exhausts women

21:06

is don't tell anybody else

21:08

about your struggles. Keep it to yourself.

21:11

It's almost like, uh, we are

21:13

told some are told, uh,

21:15

don't, don't have struggles. Because

21:18

if you have struggles, then you're a failure.

21:20

And you know, you don't want to be a failure

21:23

as a Christian. And I think

21:25

exactly the opposite. And we were just talking

21:27

about this last week, um,

21:29

with a couple of friends of mine. It's like struggle

21:32

if you are if you're asking the question, have

21:34

I committed the unpardonable sin? You

21:36

you haven't because you're asking the question.

21:38

You're worried about it. You know, you're

21:41

you're struggling in your relationship with

21:43

God and you want to feel okay.

21:46

And that desire to feel

21:48

okay. I get

21:50

it. But at the same time, you've

21:52

got to exercise that faith muscle

21:54

muscle at that time to

21:57

allow God to show you this is not

21:59

about you. Try and harder. It's about him

22:01

at work in your heart. Talk about that.

22:03

Mhm.

22:04

Yeah. And that's

22:07

really something that you

22:09

know there's, there's this that we

22:11

have to hold in tension. There

22:13

is a balance which you know that's

22:15

a difficult word, but there

22:17

is a balance between really

22:20

understanding the ways in which

22:22

I continue to live. The way

22:24

Paul talks about in Romans seven,

22:26

the things I want to do, I don't do

22:28

the things I don't want to do. Those are the

22:30

very things I do. So there's

22:33

that part. But then there's

22:35

also then there's also

22:37

an understanding that

22:39

it's the grace of God that's causing

22:42

me to grow and change.

22:44

So what I don't want

22:46

to do is be the sort of person

22:48

that says, uh, I've got

22:50

my act together, be like me.

22:53

On the other hand, I don't want to be

22:55

a person who says I.

22:57

I'm not growing at all in the

22:59

Lord. I want to and

23:01

you know, Paul, the one who wrote Romans

23:04

seven also said, I

23:06

am I am pursuing

23:08

basically with everything I

23:10

have, God's upward call

23:12

of my life in Christ Jesus

23:15

so that, you

23:17

know, we we hold that intention.

23:20

Chris, I am

23:22

both a sinner and

23:24

a saint at the same time.

23:26

And so I want people

23:29

to know, hey, I'm no different

23:31

than you. I'm just like you. So

23:33

you can have hope that the Lord will use

23:35

you. But also, on the other hand,

23:38

I want to say I

23:40

want to press hard after

23:42

the Lord and what he's called

23:45

me to do, which means that I

23:47

live a life of confession and repentance.

23:50

Yes. Um, and

23:52

it strikes me that as far

23:54

as the struggle goes,

23:56

it's when people have called.

23:59

Well, it's when the psalmist really gets

24:01

real and says, how?

24:03

How long? Oh, Lord, you know, why

24:06

aren't you listening to me? Why aren't you hearing the cry

24:08

of my heart? I feel like this. And

24:10

the psalmist, usually by the end,

24:13

brings himself around

24:15

to the truth of who God really is.

24:18

But on on this program, when people

24:20

will call in and we'll talk about their own struggles,

24:22

that is so comforting

24:25

to other people to say, I'm not alone,

24:27

I don't. There's somebody else that's

24:29

in the same. So admitting

24:32

that and talking about that can

24:34

be one of the most freeing things that you

24:36

do for yourself and others in the body,

24:38

don't you think?

24:40

Absolutely. And I love

24:42

it when my pastors

24:44

and I have two,

24:46

two elders in my church who

24:49

carry the primary preaching

24:51

of, you know, the messages

24:54

to my church. And I love it

24:56

when they are transparent

24:58

and say, you know, today we're

25:00

talking about, let's say, anxiety.

25:03

Uh, and I want you to know, this

25:05

is how I struggle with anxiety.

25:09

See that that,

25:11

you know, I think some people think, well, you

25:13

know, when you say that, then that means

25:15

that you're not really you, you

25:17

know, walking in faith or something. Listen,

25:20

that really encourages me, that

25:22

somebody that I know loves

25:24

Christ also struggles

25:27

in a way that's similar to ways

25:29

that I do. And that gives me hope

25:32

that God can use me as well.

25:34

Amen. All right. Is this striking

25:36

a nerve in your own heart? As you listen

25:38

today, I'll open the phone lines again. (877) 548-3675.

25:45

At least Fitzpatrick is with us today.

25:47

Find out more about her at the website Chris

25:49

Fabry live org. Rolland

26:04

Warren sent an email a little earlier

26:06

today. Rolland is CEO

26:08

and president of Coronet. And

26:11

he told a story about Valerie.

26:13

Valerie said, I'm a miracle.

26:15

When I'd been in my mother's womb for almost

26:18

three months, the doctors declared a miscarriage

26:21

and performed a DNC abortion.

26:23

Two weeks later, my mother knew she was

26:25

still pregnant, and around her initial

26:28

delivery date, I appeared

26:31

a healthy £9, 22 inch

26:33

baby without a scratch on me.

26:35

I met the doctor who performed the DNC.

26:38

Years later, Valerie, I

26:40

know I did a good job. You shouldn't be here

26:43

is what he said. That

26:45

experience reminds me, Valerie

26:48

says, every time I sit across from

26:50

a woman considering abortion, that life

26:52

is a miracle. It

26:54

was never my plan to work at a pregnancy

26:56

center, but here I am every

26:58

day, embracing my

27:00

own God given story.

27:03

How I survived. Only

27:05

God knows. But I'm alive.

27:08

And in the mornings I pray I am living

27:10

God's plan when I offer a hope and a future

27:13

to women frightened about the unknown.

27:15

That's the kind of person working

27:18

with and for can't

27:21

today click the green button at the website

27:23

Chris Fabry live. Org. There's

27:25

a welcome there to you as a

27:28

listener to this program. You

27:30

can download a free devotional,

27:32

A lifeline of Hope.

27:34

It's a 40 day free

27:36

devotional. And there are other things

27:38

that the other really

27:40

good thing is that you'll start to pray for

27:42

people like Valerie on the front lines,

27:45

and for the men and women who are struggling

27:47

to make this life

27:49

decision. Click the Green Connect

27:52

button. Find out more about the Pro Abundant

27:54

Life Ministry of Connect right there.

27:56

Go to Chris Fabry live. Org.

27:59

Elyse Fitzpatrick is joining

28:01

us today at the Radio Backyard Fence.

28:03

She's written a book called worthy Celebrating

28:06

the Value of Women. We have that click

28:08

through today's information and the audio,

28:10

and you'll be able to see that. She's also

28:13

speaking at the Called conference

28:15

at Moody Bible Institute on Saturday,

28:17

April 13th. And

28:19

there's information about that as well.

28:21

We have a we have a green button for everything for

28:23

you today. Just go to Chris Fabry live

28:26

org. And if you are

28:28

a woman in the Midwest

28:31

and you feel like there's something

28:33

more and this is not to add

28:35

anything, at least this is not to add

28:37

to a woman's, uh, you

28:40

know, expectation. You have

28:42

to do this in order to be a godly woman. Right?

28:46

Right. You know, um, yes.

28:50

We're we're we're spending, uh, some

28:52

lovely time here this morning talking

28:55

about how it's important,

28:57

uh, to to rest

29:00

in what Christ has done. And

29:03

then we're talking about attending a

29:05

conference on being called

29:07

to serve others

29:10

your sisters, your family,

29:12

those around you, um,

29:14

because of what Christ has done for you. And,

29:17

you know, I think, Chris, that the

29:19

thing that that really makes a difference

29:22

is, do

29:24

you do you want to serve God because

29:26

you're trying to earn

29:28

something or prove something?

29:31

Or are you serving God out

29:34

of gratitude? And

29:37

honestly, if you're serving

29:39

God because you're trying to earn something

29:41

or prove something, or you think

29:43

things really depend on you,

29:46

uh, then then that's

29:48

going to be onerous. It's going to be really, really

29:50

difficult. But if

29:52

instead you're wanting

29:55

to serve those around you and you can

29:57

do that really well by coming to the called

29:59

conference, um, you

30:01

can learn about how to do that.

30:03

If you're doing that because

30:05

you recognize that you are loved

30:08

and that you are called to

30:11

rest, uh, to

30:13

do your work from a place of

30:16

peace. And you

30:18

you are filled with gratitude

30:20

because of what the Lord has

30:22

done for you. Um,

30:25

then that will make all the difference in the

30:27

world. Uh, recently,

30:29

Chris, I had an opportunity

30:31

to, um, to visit

30:33

a ministry here in San Diego,

30:37

and I was really touched by the fact

30:39

that there were people who

30:41

were who were suffering,

30:44

um, in, in my in my lovely

30:47

city in San Diego. I was really

30:49

I was really touched by that.

30:52

And I thought, you know,

30:54

Jesus saw me in

30:56

my suffering, in

30:59

my, um, uh,

31:01

in the, in the troubles that

31:03

I had in part made for myself,

31:06

but also that, you know, we're just part

31:08

of living life. And he

31:10

didn't look away. Therefore,

31:14

I don't want to look away

31:16

from the suffering that I

31:18

see around me. And you

31:20

see, it's that motivation,

31:23

Chris, that makes the difference

31:25

between whether or not I'm

31:28

working to try to get

31:30

approval, to try to get

31:32

the approval of others, or to try

31:34

to get the Lord's approval, or even

31:36

my own approval to try

31:39

to prove something. Or if

31:41

I am working because

31:44

I'm filled with gratitude

31:46

for what the Lord has done

31:49

for me. Uh, even

31:51

though of course I, I don't

31:53

deserve any of it. But

31:55

you see, if if there's that gratitude,

31:58

Chris, he didn't look away from

32:00

you, and he hasn't

32:02

looked away from me. And

32:05

those of you who are listening

32:07

here today, the Lord hasn't looked away

32:09

from you. Therefore,

32:12

because of that, how

32:14

can your life be spent not

32:16

looking away from the suffering that surrounds

32:19

you, but instead pouring

32:21

your life out to help others

32:23

find that that joy

32:25

and rest that Christ talked

32:28

about.

32:28

Or feeling like I have to soar.

32:31

I'm. I have to solve all the problems

32:33

and taking on and then

32:35

feeling like, well, if I can't solve

32:37

all the problems in the world, I'm not going to do

32:39

anything. You know, it paralyzes and

32:42

the enemy loves to do that. He loves to

32:44

show that in your heart that it seems

32:46

like, don't do that, because then you're going

32:48

to have to do this and this and this, and you're not enough

32:50

for that. And, um, looking

32:52

away, that's a really good way to, to

32:55

put it. And maybe there's a woman listening

32:57

today who feels like, I feel like God has

32:59

looked away from me. Let me, uh, bring

33:01

Stephanie into the conversation. Hi,

33:03

Stephanie. You're on with Elise.

33:07

Hi, Elise. Hi, Chris.

33:09

Right to have you.

33:14

To go right ahead. Stephanie. What did you want to say?

33:18

Um, I just wanted to thank Elise for bringing

33:20

this topic up. Um, in regards

33:22

to us women and in the church,

33:25

and where we're not sharing

33:27

and being authentic with each other, where the

33:29

enemy has us in a place of

33:31

bondage, um, when we're not

33:34

sharing with each other. This is something that I've

33:36

been struggling with for a while.

33:38

And in this season, he just shows me that,

33:41

you know, silence keeps, keeps

33:43

us in bondage and creates

33:45

more victims.

33:47

Um, and it seems as

33:50

the church, we're focused

33:52

on the outward, on the world

33:54

and doing good and doing work,

33:56

but we're not addressing the issues

33:59

within the church and within our

34:01

family. Um, that's

34:03

all I you know what.

34:04

Stephanie, I and.

34:05

I, I hear a little voice behind

34:07

you, too. How do

34:09

you have a child there?

34:11

I do. She'll be two on March 30th.

34:13

I actually have four children.

34:15

Do you have four? So?

34:17

So this whole of

34:20

feeling exhausted and there's

34:22

got. I got to do more. I got to that.

34:24

That kind of resonates with you as well,

34:26

right?

34:27

Yes. As I sit here in front of my

34:30

online schooling, going back to school

34:32

for, uh, Christian ministry. Yes.

34:34

Wow, wow. There's

34:36

a lot going there at least. What do you say?

34:39

Yeah. Well, first of all.

34:42

Uh, Stephanie. Thank you. Thanks

34:44

for calling. Thanks for being

34:46

the woman that you are, that

34:48

you're. That you're seeking

34:50

to, uh, minister, uh,

34:53

to your

34:55

children, your family,

34:57

and also to women around

35:00

you. So you're taking courses

35:02

to do that? That's really. That's

35:04

really beautiful. Um,

35:06

so thank you for that. I,

35:08

I, I really agree with you

35:11

that there

35:14

needs to be a place

35:16

and, and it needs to be a safe

35:18

place where you

35:20

can talk about

35:22

the kinds of struggles that you have

35:25

with others who, uh,

35:27

agree with you, who

35:29

are in the fight with you

35:31

and who can be

35:33

encouraged as they as they

35:36

watch you, um,

35:38

as they watch you, even in the struggle

35:40

and continuing to persevere.

35:43

So, you know, thank you.

35:46

Thank you so much for that.

35:48

And, you know, I, I really

35:50

want to encourage the women who are

35:52

listening. You

35:54

know, there's there's a thing that goes

35:56

on, on social media where, you know,

35:58

your house is supposed to look a certain

36:00

way and your kids are supposed

36:03

to look a certain way, and you're supposed

36:05

to be, you know, healthy and fit

36:07

and all these things. And, you know, none of

36:09

that is wrong in itself.

36:12

But so many women

36:14

don't feel like they're measuring up,

36:16

and then they keep that as

36:18

a secret. Or perhaps

36:21

they're even being sinned against by someone,

36:23

and they keep that as

36:25

a secret because they think that they're

36:27

not supposed to talk. And

36:30

I just want to I want to encourage

36:33

women who are listening to,

36:35

to find 2 or 3

36:38

trusted allies

36:40

with whom you can share

36:42

what's going on in your life,

36:44

and then that you can pray

36:46

for and encourage one

36:49

another. And, you know, we we

36:51

need to stop pretending

36:53

that we are somehow

36:55

better than we are. And

36:58

then remember that the Lord

37:00

is with us through it all.

37:02

I was just going to ask you, so how do you find a safe

37:05

place? Because I agree with that and

37:07

you just answered it. But let me ask

37:09

you again. Do you say find 2 or

37:12

3? How do you find those 2

37:14

or 3? How do you know this person

37:16

is safe and is

37:18

an ally, rather than

37:20

someone who will

37:23

bring more expectation to you?

37:25

Or do you? Or can you know that.

37:28

Uh, you know that that happens in relationship?

37:31

It happens in community and

37:33

it happens over time. So,

37:36

you know, obviously you

37:38

can go to someone who by

37:41

vocation is a counselor

37:43

and can help you. And

37:45

I believe that that's a really

37:48

wonderful resource for

37:50

women, but also

37:53

to to build relationships

37:56

with people with whom perhaps

37:58

you share a little bit of

38:01

your life to see, okay,

38:03

are they going to be trustworthy

38:06

with what I've given them?

38:09

Uh, are they going to

38:11

point me toward Jesus Christ?

38:14

And, you know, he's the one that

38:16

says, come unto me, all

38:18

you who labor and are heavy

38:20

laden, and I will give

38:22

you rest. Take your

38:25

take my yoke upon you,

38:27

and learn of me. For I

38:29

am gentle and humble in soul,

38:32

and you will find rest

38:34

for your soul. So Jesus,

38:37

is this a person who's going

38:39

to point me toward the Lord

38:41

and the rest that he's offering

38:43

me? Or is this a person who

38:46

just wants to give me some

38:48

easy fix? You know, five

38:50

steps to Being a Better you?

38:53

Um, that happens in community

38:55

and relationship, and it's

38:57

not something that generally

39:00

happens overnight.

39:01

It also strikes me that we've been

39:04

talking about struggle. And Stephanie, thank you for

39:06

being totally vulnerable and

39:08

honest with us here today. God bless you, friend.

39:11

Um, when a person

39:13

who is okay with your struggle

39:15

or okay listening

39:18

to what is really going on and

39:20

even asks more questions, well,

39:22

you know, tell me more about what what what is going

39:24

on and is not there so that

39:27

they can give you, you know, five

39:29

verses and, uh, send

39:31

you a link to a sermon that they just heard,

39:33

although that can be good too. I'm not saying

39:36

don't give it, but if but if their

39:38

desire is to to be with

39:40

you, to be present with you, I think that's

39:42

a hint. This might.

39:44

Be.

39:44

The kind of person that Elise Fitzpatrick

39:47

is talking about. If you go to.

39:48

The website Chris.

39:49

Fabri Live, or you can find

39:51

out more about that called conference

39:54

that's coming up in April at,

39:56

uh, in Chicago at Moody Bible Institute.

39:58

Just go to Chris Fabry live.

40:01

Org more straight ahead.

40:03

On Moody Radio. Elise

40:14

Fitzpatrick, author speaker,

40:17

is joining us today at the Radio Backyard Fence,

40:19

and I wanted you to get this on your radar.

40:21

If you're a woman and you're in the Midwest

40:24

or maybe outside the Midwest and can

40:26

make it to Chicago in April,

40:28

the called conference, we have a green

40:30

button for you. Click the called conference. You can

40:32

find out more about all the speakers, all the workshops,

40:35

all the worship that's going to go on.

40:37

But Elise is one of the keynote

40:40

speakers, and she's written a number of

40:42

books, including one that she

40:44

wrote with Eric Schumacher called worthy

40:47

Celebrating the Value of

40:49

Women. And that plays into our

40:51

conversation here today. So click

40:53

through today's information. You'll find out more about

40:55

that worthy celebrating the Value

40:57

of women as well as information

40:59

about the Called conference.

41:02

Hey men, this might be if you're

41:04

your wife is just feeling this,

41:07

uh, call to be called

41:09

and to do, you know, be all she can be.

41:12

Uh, this might be something that you can

41:14

help with as well. So

41:17

again, it's at the website. Click the green button

41:19

for the called conference at Chris Fabry

41:21

Live. Org Elise

41:24

what gives women

41:26

value then if it's not in

41:28

what I can do the treadmill I can get

41:30

on the success. You know here's Elise,

41:33

she's written all these books, she's a plenary

41:35

speaker, etc., etc.. So you're

41:37

saying that's not the value of women?

41:39

Where is that value? Uh,

41:42

where does it come from?

41:44

Yeah. Thank you Chris. Um,

41:48

well, of course, first of all, my

41:50

value comes from the fact

41:52

that as a woman, I

41:54

have been created in the image of God.

41:57

And so, you know,

41:59

in Genesis, God

42:02

says, let us make mankind

42:05

in our image and in the

42:07

image of God. He created them

42:10

male and female. He created

42:12

them. So as a woman,

42:14

I have value simply

42:17

because. I

42:19

am created in the image of God.

42:22

And, um, I

42:24

think it's really important for women

42:26

to rest in the fact

42:28

that they are created

42:31

in the image of God, neither

42:33

more nor less

42:36

than their brothers. So

42:38

both male and female

42:40

are equally created

42:42

in the image of God. So

42:44

that gives me value to start

42:46

out with. But then secondarily,

42:49

as a believer, as

42:52

someone for whom Christ

42:54

died, then I

42:56

have ultimate value

42:58

to the Lord because

43:00

and not because of what I have

43:02

done. You know, it's that it's that song

43:05

that we sing all the time. Nothing

43:07

in my hands I bring simply

43:10

to thy cross I cling. So

43:12

it's because of the perfect

43:15

life, sinless

43:17

life, the substance,

43:19

missionary death, the bodily

43:22

resurrection, and

43:24

the bodily ascension of Jesus

43:26

Christ that I have

43:29

put my faith in. And

43:31

of course, that faith is a gift. Ephesians

43:33

two tells me that faith is a

43:36

gift. So I have

43:38

that faith in Christ

43:40

and what he's done for me, and that

43:42

gives me ultimate

43:44

value. What that means is,

43:47

as Jesus said in John 17,

43:49

that I am loved

43:52

with the same love

43:55

with which the father

43:57

loves the son. So

43:59

why do I have value? Do I have value

44:02

because I write books or, you

44:04

know, speak? Or because I'm a grandma?

44:06

Or because what? You

44:09

fill out the list. Now, those

44:11

are not the things that that give me value.

44:13

Those are many of them, things that I

44:16

have done out of gratitude

44:18

for the fact that I

44:21

have been declared

44:23

a person of a human

44:26

of value because of

44:28

the work that God has done for

44:30

me. And so what we

44:32

did in the worthy book was

44:34

just basically start in Genesis

44:36

and go all the way through the book of revelation

44:39

and highlight all the ways

44:42

that God said,

44:44

this woman, because

44:46

of who she is as a

44:48

daughter of mine, is a person of value.

44:51

And that's to what we hope to do

44:53

at the called conference

44:55

is to say, you know, you're feeling

44:57

a call to serve God. That's wonderful.

45:00

Don't think for a minute it's all about

45:02

you. It's because

45:04

of what the Lord has

45:06

done and will do

45:08

by his power and grace

45:10

through you. Yes. So,

45:13

um, I have great hope.

45:15

I have great hope that even

45:17

though I fail, and I'm not just

45:19

saying that, you know, willy nilly.

45:22

Oh, yeah, I'm fail. I'm like, no, actually,

45:24

actually, uh, my

45:26

heart tends to be kind of a dumpster

45:29

fire. Even though I

45:31

do that, I know that

45:33

I'm a value to the Lord

45:35

because he created me and

45:38

he redeemed me, and he will

45:40

bring me home. Um.

45:42

You know, it makes me think, uh, let

45:44

me tell you, the code conference is we have

45:46

a link at Green button at Chris Fabry live org,

45:49

and you can find out more about Elise

45:51

Worthy celebrating the value of women.

45:53

But it makes me think, especially coming up to Palm

45:55

Sunday. And then all that happens during Holy

45:58

Week, the vital place

46:00

that women played in

46:02

that, in the way that that story

46:04

worked itself out and God

46:07

and his kindness involved

46:09

men and women, you know, doing

46:11

being being there to see the risen

46:13

Lord to to see his

46:15

suffering and his agony and to be there,

46:18

um, it's really, really great to think about

46:21

and at least our time I knew would fly by.

46:23

Thank you so much for joining us here today.

46:25

Come back again. Okay.

46:27

Thank you Chris.

46:28

Thank you so much.

46:29

Elise Fitzpatrick.

46:32

She's going to be speaking at the Called conference. We

46:34

have a link at the website. If you're

46:36

in the Midwest, April 13th

46:38

is the date for that. Chris Fabry Live

46:41

for our.

46:42

Program is a production of Moody Radio,

46:45

a ministry of Moody Bible Institute.

46:47

Thanks a lot for listening.