Conflict resolution, on this episode of Cigars and Sea Stories Michael J. Penney and Bennett Tanton are talking about how to handle violence in school.

We all want to protect our children from harm and the horrors of evil but we can all acknowledge those horrors do exist, and unfortunately, our children will have to contend with them.

A lot of people have asked the question, “how do we prevent these things from happening?”, well it starts with treating young people with some respect and allowing them to make mistakes. That includes making the mistake of running their mouths to someone who is about to kick their ass!

To quote a wise man, “if you’d ever been in a real fight, you wouldn’t be so keen to get into another.”

Kids cannot fight in school. There is a time and a place for everything. Rough housing in the classroom cannot be tolerated but what happens after the final bell is left to the imagination.

Here’s the real question that needs to be asked, “Whatever happened to the ‘treeline’?”. Settling differences with regulated conflict can be a growing experience for everyone involved.

In the past children learned that violence, real killing violence, was not the answer to solving problems when talk is no longer relevant.

What happens, though, when all of the BS “talk it through” feel-good stuff doesn’t work? When is physical conflict between young people OK? Conflict between people is a natural thing. Differing ideas and opinions flare into real acts of violence, and it only gets worse when we are adults. If children do not learn conflict resolution and proper use of defensive force as a kid, they grow up lacking the skills needed to be a productive adult, which may result in a further feeling of isolation and anxiety. There is a great deal of confidence gained by an individual who knows how to wield their physical power with discipline.

True discipline is knowing you can win in a fight but not aggressing others to the occasion. We don’t want kids who know how to start fights, we want kids who know how to end them.

Listen to the episode and weigh in with your own comments at cigarsandseastories.com   

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