0:00

That's right. He

0:28

said it and he sang it. It

0:30

is comedy bang bang. changed

0:36

from tune

0:40

to tune tune

0:48

to tune tune

0:53

to tune Indana

1:12

Follow through Hi,

1:28

I'm Paul. Hi. I was

1:30

a very, was it

1:33

wistful? Was

1:35

it... I think it was

1:37

slinky. Yeah, it kind of reminded me, because

1:39

at first I thought you were singing Hey

1:42

Big Spender. You were petrified. Yeah.

1:45

I was petrified. But

1:50

it kind of sounds like that, doesn't

1:52

it? Like, doo-bick spender. Doo-bick spender. Doo-bick

1:54

spender. Doo-bick spender. Doo-bick spender. Doo-bick spender.

1:56

A little time with me. Do

2:00

big spender. Do bap. Wow.

2:04

That's like the natura of substituting do for

2:06

words. He can't even say hey. Yeah, yeah,

2:08

yeah. He's like do big spender. Yes to

2:10

do. All my do's were

2:12

so do away. He

2:14

did. Didn't he cover yesterday? Because I feel

2:16

like- He did somewhere. Oh, something. Something, sorry.

2:18

Yeah. Something. It

2:22

was one of those some words that George Harrison

2:24

wrote. A

2:26

friend of mine, an older friend who grew up-

2:29

Oh, he's not that much older than me. But he

2:31

grew up so- So he just

2:33

kept getting older. Grew

2:36

up here in Los Angeles, was the

2:38

son of a showbiz family. And

2:41

one time he remembers as a

2:43

kid meeting Paul Lind at a family

2:45

party. And

2:49

my friend was very into the Beatles at the time. And

2:52

you know because Paul- Because one's stopping in the Beatles. What kind of

2:54

music do you listen to? And he's like I

2:57

really like the Beatles. And Paul Lind said, I like

3:00

that song something. I really

3:02

like that song something. Something.

3:05

Yeah. Yeah, interesting. It

3:07

is interesting the song something. Because

3:10

Frank Sinatra was saying this song

3:13

rivals Cole Porter's songs. And

3:15

he was trying to say like- Because

3:18

all those rap pack guys would talk about how the Beatles

3:20

were garbage. They were so happy

3:23

when Dean Martin hit number one with

3:25

Everybody Loves Somebody. They're like the Beatle

3:27

Buster, Dee Zito you did it. Because

3:30

they felt like Rock and Roll was coming

3:33

in on their territory. Like they were the-

3:35

Good, good, good. And then

3:37

suddenly they all start covering something and they're

3:39

all like this is one of the most

3:41

beautiful love songs ever written. Like almost as

3:43

an apology like this song's okay by the

3:45

Beatles. Yeah. It's not that

3:47

different than any of their other songs. And then Sammy

3:49

Davis Jr. does Maxwell Silver Hammer. Exactly.

3:53

I forget what song it was that Frank Sinatra would

3:55

not- He wouldn't do Somebody

3:57

Brought the Song to Him. It's a famous song. And

4:00

then his response was, where's the chick? Where's

4:04

the chick? There wasn't a chick in it. There

4:06

wasn't like a love song. A chick that he

4:08

was talking about. Interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what

4:10

other songs because he did the song Old McDonald.

4:12

There's not a chick in that. I

4:15

guess there's a chick. There's a chick there.

4:17

I'm so sorry. Oh my god. Of all

4:19

the songs. That

4:21

was maybe the most chicks in it. Let

4:25

me let me look it up. All right, look it up. While

4:27

you do that, let me tell everyone what they're

4:30

listening to. Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang Best of

4:32

23 Part 2. This

4:35

is the second episode if you have not heard

4:37

part one. Why don't you go backwards one episode,

4:40

you dumb asshole. Hey. You're

4:43

gonna miss a bunch of shit. Oh

4:46

god. I inhaled really

4:48

sharply. Here, let me help you up. This

4:54

is part two. What we're doing

4:56

is we're counting down your choices for

4:58

the best episodes of Comedy Bang Bang

5:00

of 2023. We've

5:03

been doing the top 16. On today's

5:06

episode, you will hear numbers 12, 11. That's

5:13

right. We'll crack the top 10. We'll hear number

5:15

10 and number 9. Very exciting

5:18

stuff. My

5:20

name is Scott Auchen. I'm the host of Comedy

5:23

Bang Bang. I have been for the entirety. Well,

5:25

I wouldn't say the entirety because there were a few random

5:28

episodes I couldn't host early on when we had to do

5:30

it at a specific time on a specific day. True.

5:33

But in fact, my guest hosted

5:35

one that I can recall. Maybe

5:38

even two. I don't know. Did you do two or one? You

5:41

said my guest hosted one. Yeah,

5:43

I did two. You did two? I did

5:45

two. All right. He did two. He

5:47

claims I have no way of knowing

5:50

if that is factually correct. He is.

5:53

There is no way of knowing. He

5:55

is an incredible liar. But

5:58

you know him as. And

6:01

he's rebranded himself. He

6:04

is the great grand, what are you

6:07

the great grand uncle? You're the grand

6:09

uncle. Paul F. Tompkins is here with

6:11

me. Grand

6:14

uncle Paul F. Tompkins. Hi everybody. It's the grand

6:16

uncle. He's trying it out for three months. It's

6:19

the grand uncle. Three months? Yeah. Jesus.

6:22

Do at least like, you know, all the way through March, your

6:25

varietopia shows and everything. I

6:27

can't find the story. What did you look up?

6:30

Story plus song? Yeah. It's

6:32

nothing. Not even Frank Sinatra. Really? Nothing

6:35

came up? Yeah. Just

6:38

Googling story and the word song. Well

6:41

I'm double definition of course.

6:46

Double D's. God

6:48

damn. Where did I hear that story?

6:50

I don't know. I wonder what song it was. Happy birthday?

6:53

Beautiful. No, that sometimes has a chick in it. Yeah,

6:55

that's right. Yeah. Happy birthday

6:57

dear Michelle. The whole

6:59

dear part of it. Why didn't you roll your eyes? Michelle

7:04

doesn't really come off the tongue when you're singing happy

7:06

birthday. No. It's just one of the

7:08

worst names to have a birthday, you know? Happy

7:11

birthday dear Michelle. What's

7:14

the ideal happy birthday name? Happy birthday dear

7:16

Ronald. Ronald. Yeah,

7:18

two like perfect consonants. The emphasis

7:20

is in the right place. Yeah, the first syllable.

7:22

It still sounds like your name. Yeah. Yeah.

7:26

Like even. Oh my God. He just has

7:28

Indian devil. He's whirling around. Names

7:30

have one syllable or bad. Happy birthday dear Paul. Dear Scott.

7:33

I fucking hate it. What would you prefer? Happy

7:35

birthday dear Paul F. Yeah. That

7:37

would be better for you. I wouldn't mind that. Yeah. But

7:40

three syllable words even worse. Happy

7:55

birthday dear Jennifer. Oh God.

7:58

Get that out of my ear. Actually not that

8:00

bad. I can't have you ever had

8:02

a birthday have to sing happy birthday birthday Thank

8:06

you. I have all the information I

8:08

need Have you ever having things

8:10

down in a notebook? Have you ever had to sing happy

8:12

birthday to someone? That

8:14

you didn't know that well and

8:17

you weren't sure if you were supposed

8:19

to do a Nickname or

8:21

the full name like

8:23

maybe it's like a work situation Situation right

8:25

and you don't know if everyone knows they

8:27

have this nickname. Yes. Happy birthday

8:30

dear butt chugger But

8:34

I mean sometimes people it's somebody who's not ever

8:36

known by one thing specific, right

8:40

like they're known as Taz

8:44

Or Charles Tasmanian devil is who yeah,

8:46

of course or Charles Many

8:49

people don't know that yeah, everyone called him

8:51

the Tasmanian devil is like no that is

8:53

what I am Now

9:01

back to Charles entertainment devil

9:07

Taz so fun Taz ah fun.

9:09

It's so fun to see him on the back

9:11

of a car or a sweatshirt. I love him.

9:13

Yeah He was a

9:15

bad guy in the in the cartoons, right?

9:17

He was like he was considered the villain.

9:19

Yeah Yeah, I believe so. He was always

9:21

I think the the POV character was always

9:24

whomever Taz was coming up against But I

9:26

don't remember him. I don't remember any details

9:28

about the cartoons He was in except for

9:30

him whirling around in that yeah,

9:32

and people running away from him like he's

9:34

a cyclone or something Yeah, he was very

9:37

scary-looking. Yeah, no, I mean

9:39

though that big body and tiny legs. He's a

9:41

devil That is good point

9:44

right off the top. It's in the name Which

9:46

leads me to my thesis that the

9:48

Bugs Bunny cartoons are very religious. Yes.

9:50

Thank you. You have the devil Daffy

9:54

duck punches pilot you see

9:57

yep alliterative Daffy

10:01

Huggins the Pontius pilot character who

10:03

tries to save Jesus and then

10:05

lets Porky Pig Barabbas. Well

10:12

let's welcome him Grand Uncle

10:14

Paul F. Tonkin. No I don't like it. I

10:16

already don't like it. You're stuck with it for

10:18

three months. It makes me feel so old. Well

10:21

so sorry you picked it. Reel

10:26

the tape back. I don't remember. I don't want to do

10:28

this for three months. I

10:30

mean that sounds like me for sure. It

10:33

does sound like something I would say. Paul

10:36

it is now no longer Christmas.

10:38

Our first episode came out on Christmas. And

10:42

this one is a few

10:44

days after. It is I believe it might

10:46

be according to Adam Scott. It

10:48

might be stocking day today. You

10:50

would have have to have listened to our Springsteen show

10:52

in order to. Well then forget it. I

10:55

know I'm so sorry. It

10:58

was the first time you heard of Bruce Springsteen by the way. Oh

11:00

my god for as long as it goes I actually

11:02

remember. But

11:05

he has a thing called stocking day which I believe is

11:07

today where he

11:10

and his sister convinced their

11:12

mom that stocking day

11:14

was a real tradition and that's where

11:16

you refill the stockings from

11:19

Christmas. These

11:22

children convinced their mother. No

11:26

it's a real thing. So

11:28

like we've eaten everything all the candy and everything you've

11:30

seen in the stockings you have to refill it now

11:32

to the top on stocking day. It's

11:35

funny to think about the shit that you thought you were

11:38

getting away with with your parents that they just

11:40

let go because they were fucking tired. He

11:42

is convinced that they were canny

11:44

enough to convince her that they had

11:46

heard about this tradition. No no no

11:49

no. Yeah that's what I think. She just wanted to

11:51

do it. She's like fine. What do I

11:53

care? But I think we all should celebrate stocking day.

11:55

Should we not? We disagree. You

11:58

disagree? You really? the

12:00

idea of Christmas itself. I think we should stop celebrating

12:02

Christmas as well. This is huge

12:04

news. I think we should take

12:06

a few years off from Christmas. It's not

12:08

a bad idea. Right? 365

12:10

days is too little. Let's

12:13

make it every 500. Let's shorten the

12:15

year. Yes. 100

12:17

days. 100 days, that's it. Yeah.

12:21

And then we all get older after

12:23

100 days, so we'll all be like 150 years old.

12:26

We stop counting birthdays. Why

12:28

do we need those? Why do we need birthdays? And this

12:31

is my point, and we talked about this on 3DIMM, selling

12:33

our birthdays. I'm still

12:35

taking offers. But I don't want

12:38

anyone to have a birthday. Here's what I think. You can

12:40

have birthdays. I want to sell mine before we institute this

12:42

law. Okay, all right. But sort of

12:44

like insider trading. Here on my scheme. Here on

12:46

my scheme. Okay. Um,

12:49

I think that you should have birthdays

12:51

up until you reach the age of

12:53

legality for everything.

12:56

So, 25? Yeah. The rent

12:58

a car. By the way, why

13:00

is that so... I

13:02

don't know. I remember

13:04

being 23, having no

13:06

idea that was a rule or a law. Is

13:09

it a law or a rule? It's a guideline

13:11

and a principle. It's a tenet. Um,

13:16

but just going like, okay, I'll rent a car

13:18

to get my stuff over here. And then finding

13:20

out about it, and it's like, what the fuck

13:22

is so different from, first of all, 18, I

13:24

could go to war. Yeah. Which

13:27

is the worst of everything. 18, go to war. But

13:31

you can't rent a car no more. Um,

13:34

21, I can finally

13:36

become an alcoholic. Yeah. But

13:38

20... A legal alcohol. Yes,

13:41

but 25 to rent a car. What's the... I

13:43

mean, where am I going to drive off to in between 21 and 25

13:45

that I won't drive off to when

13:48

I'm 25? Well, I think the thing is,

13:51

is that they want

13:53

you to have about 10 years of

13:55

experience or as close to that as

13:57

possible. Right? So if you get your driver's...

14:00

license when you're a teen. But

14:02

because it's a business, you

14:05

can fuck up your dad's car all

14:07

you want. Go ahead. Enjoy yourself. Yeah.

14:10

I hope you crack it. You peep the shit. I

14:14

think it's so crazy that we let 15-year-olds

14:16

drive. I'm down with the 25 running

14:19

a car as long as you can't

14:21

drive a car until you're 21. I

14:24

don't think anyone under 21 should be driving cars.

14:27

Can you imagine? You remember driving

14:29

a car when you were 16? You're

14:31

a dumb idiot. How old do you have to be to be

14:33

like an Uber driver? Are there teen

14:35

Uber drivers? I think, according to my experience, 65

14:37

and chatty. It's

14:42

65 and chatty out there. But

14:47

okay, so 25, then no more birthdays

14:49

until you can collect Social Security. So 2565 or

14:51

whatever the age it ends up being? Yeah,

14:56

yeah, yeah. Is it up to 67

14:58

now? Or they don't even, like the government keeps track of

15:00

it and then they just send you, they

15:02

start sending you the checks. Here's the thing,

15:05

government should keep track of our birthdays. They

15:07

already know this information, right? Yes.

15:10

Would it kill you, government, to send me a card every year? Exactly.

15:13

I'm also tired of having to

15:15

fill out my birthday for everything.

15:17

Everything. You know it. It's

15:19

out there. Check my Wikipedia, idiot.

15:22

Hey, why

15:24

are you wasting my time? I have a Wikipedia

15:26

page. It's got all the information. Just go right

15:28

there. I don't, every time you go- My credit

15:31

card number's on there? Any time you go into

15:33

any kind of a medical appointment now, teeth, feet,

15:36

tits, whatever, you

15:38

gotta fill up the same exact form. Just

15:40

check out my Wikipedia, idiots. I

15:44

like when you go to a pharmacy and

15:47

they- Paul's mid-bite, by the way. I'm

15:49

mid-bite, baby. They

15:51

ask you, I'm having a nice

15:53

little peppermint. Do you have

15:55

the peppermint in there? Because I got a toffee one

15:57

that I did. Peppermint rocha?

16:00

That's okay, but if there was more of

16:02

a chocolate situation in there, that's what

16:04

I prefer. Because I had one of those in the... You've

16:06

separated all the candies you don't like into

16:09

the public one. Yeah, that's right. And

16:11

so all I had was one that I didn't like.

16:13

I would like one that I do like. Oh, honey.

16:15

If that's all right. Anyway... This is

16:17

chocolate, little Santa. I'll take that. There

16:19

you go. Um, so you have

16:22

to give your name. Where are we

16:24

talking... I forgot where we're at. Pharmacy. Great.

16:27

And then date of birth. Right. I'll

16:29

give you the phone number if you've been there before. I

16:31

love that date of birth is everything to the

16:33

pharmacy. They love that date of birth, baby. They

16:35

love it. Oh my god. By the way, it

16:38

has sick for it. No fucking effect on whether

16:40

you get your drugs or not. Yeah.

16:43

You know what I mean? There's no reason that

16:45

they should even have your date of

16:47

birth. Like that's impossible information to obtain.

16:49

Mm-hmm. Like, you know... Yeah,

16:51

it could be... So your imposter can't take

16:54

your pills. Yeah. No one

16:56

knows your date of birth. Yeah. It's

16:58

on everyone's Facebook page. Otherwise, any

17:00

old junkie would come in here

17:02

getting your well butrin. Your

17:07

oh, oh, oh, oh, damn,

17:09

bitch. We can't have strangers claiming

17:12

your Crestor. Ah,

17:14

man. All right.

17:18

Well, we finally got that off our chest. And that's what

17:20

we're here to do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well,

17:22

we'll see you next week. Yep. For

17:25

second Christmas tree day. I

17:28

remember I convinced my dad. He

17:30

had to go get a second Christmas tree. Oh,

17:33

I just heard a story. Tell me. Because

17:36

I'm still mid-bite. From my friend David Reese

17:38

on his podcast with his friend

17:40

John Kimball called Like The Profit Makers. That's

17:42

right. One of the members of the... The Comic Group.

17:45

We talked about this on one of our previous

17:47

episodes. And he

17:49

said when he was a kid, his

17:51

dad did not like colored lights

17:54

on the tree. So they only had white lights on the

17:56

tree. And like that. He's

17:58

making a strong aesthetic choice. And then

18:01

but David really one of the colored

18:03

lights his dad said I tell you what because there was

18:05

this area that was being Deforested

18:07

or whatever in their town. And

18:10

so he went and got like chopped down a tree And

18:13

down a tree. Anyway, go ahead And

18:16

so David had his own personal Christmas tree

18:18

in his bedroom Really bedroom but colored lights

18:20

on cool up would be very excited here

18:22

cool up would be very excited I was

18:24

very excited hearing it Wow have a real

18:26

tree in your bedroom personal bedroom tree when

18:28

you're a kid That's

18:31

the light. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah,

18:33

I came to appreciate the white lights the

18:36

simple white lights because Try

18:38

my parents Charles Grodin what I was

18:46

Because Growing

18:48

up my parents had the craziest

18:50

brightest get most garish lights with

18:52

the most garish Star that

18:55

they bought when I was I think four

18:57

or five did the lights blink. Yes, they

18:59

blinked in crazy Rapid

19:01

patterns and it was it was one of those

19:03

new things because every star before then it just

19:05

been like a tin star Or something. Oh the

19:07

star has blinking. Yeah the star Okay Had

19:10

these just incredibly rapid blinking lights and then they

19:12

got the rapid blinking lights on the tree itself

19:14

It was just like such I remember

19:16

being enraptured by when I was a kid But

19:19

then kind of rebelling against it when I grew up

19:21

and saying like let's keep it simple Yeah

19:31

The the slow Fading

19:35

twinkle that exists now on

19:38

some light. Yeah. Yeah the ones that just kind of like oh

19:42

They don't know do it at the same time.

19:44

It's beautiful Beautiful you

19:46

have a tree up We didn't

19:48

get a tree this year because of we're

19:50

going away last episode. We talked about the

19:52

garage Oh the garage your

19:54

whole garage garage is in flux and So

19:59

we did not get a tree this year year but I think

20:02

no I don't think I know next

20:04

year we're doing fake tree fake

20:06

tree that's the way to do it

20:08

these days yeah because if we'd had a fake tree we

20:11

would have had a tree this year here's the

20:13

thing if trees only took a year to

20:15

grow oh these

20:18

these Christmas trees that we have the furs

20:20

wheel then yeah let's cut

20:22

one down every year do you

20:24

know what I would do what if it if

20:26

a tree took one year to grow and then

20:29

five days to die like

20:32

us all or like let's say let's say it

20:34

took let's say it took

20:36

a month to die okay okay

20:39

so wait 11 11 months to grow one

20:41

month to die one month to grow one month to die I

20:44

would dig a permanent

20:47

hole yes in my living

20:49

room floor yes plant the tree

20:51

there and then watch it grow watch

20:53

it grow decorate it the day after

20:55

Thanksgiving uh-huh it slowly dies slowly

20:58

dies over the course of a month you don't

21:00

have to worry about like well we have to

21:02

you know it's gonna die within a week you

21:04

know it's gonna die by the

21:06

end of the year I worry about your

21:08

insulation and your feeding no don't well no

21:10

it would be somehow I

21:13

wouldn't I wouldn't do this myself of course I'd

21:15

hire so I

21:17

wouldn't take a pickaxe to my floor tell you what

21:19

I'll make this deal with you I will create

21:22

trees that grow in 11 months

21:24

and only take one month okay if you don't hire

21:26

someone you do this yourself deal

21:29

okay also

21:31

speaking of creating things we were waiting on that

21:34

clock so waiting on that clock it's been four

21:36

days at this point yeah received it yeah

21:39

no status updates so if you know that

21:41

you are working on the clock let us know

21:44

give us a gilded age update that you are

21:46

working on the clock you fix the easement did

21:48

the clock can you finally figured it out I'm

21:51

the only one in this show who has this

21:53

voice I know

21:57

New York City is a melting

21:59

pot but Come on. He was the

22:01

first guy to have that accent. And then

22:03

every single working partner. Everyone else sounds like

22:05

this. What

22:08

are we doing, Paul? We're... We're counting down

22:10

Best Doves, baby. Count down Best Doves. I

22:12

mentioned it earlier. We're doing 12

22:14

through 9 this time. And

22:17

boy, those first four that we heard on Monday.

22:20

Corquers. Amazing. I

22:22

nearly busted my scenes from laughing. Stop

22:24

the lights. Oh, please

22:26

stop the lights. And

22:29

why don't we get to it, Paul? I

22:31

mean, we're here. Why don't we? Why

22:34

don't we get to it? Let's

22:36

do it. Let's go to your

22:38

choice for episode number 12. Number

22:42

1, 2. All right. Episode

22:44

number 12. This is number 801. Wow.

22:50

Early 800s. Almost

22:52

as early as you can get. I

22:56

mean, technically... What?

23:01

It's almost as early as you can get. We

23:03

talked about it in this episode. We definitely break

23:05

off another hundo in this episode. Right. A

23:08

tradition that was established, I believe, by John

23:11

Glaser on episode 201,

23:13

I believe. He

23:17

coined the term... Break off a hundo? Breaking off

23:19

another hundo. Okay. I had

23:21

never really thought about, but yes, we were...

23:25

801, 701, that is breaking off a new hundo. Right.

23:29

So this, we talked about that a little bit, but we're not going to hear that.

23:31

Do you consider episode 800 to be in the 800s? I

23:35

do, yes. Okay. So 801 is

23:38

almost as early as you can get in the 800s. Exactly.

23:41

Yeah. I was about to maybe... Fall

23:44

down? Yeah, I was going to fall down in

23:46

a heart attack. I realized I just

23:48

had indigestion. I fell down in a heart

23:50

attack. A bit of boiled

23:52

potato. This

23:55

is an episode. It came out on March 19th of 2023,

23:57

and it's an episode called... Wi-Fi

24:01

for a

24:04

wife guy.

24:06

This is our

24:08

good friend from Saturday Night Live

24:10

in the Lonely Island, Andy Samberg.

24:14

He and our other good

24:16

friend Neil Campbell, Camp

24:19

Bell, they

24:21

both came on together as a team to

24:24

promote their new adult animation show called Digman,

24:26

which was on Comedy Central. Now I believe

24:28

you can see it on Paramount+. I think

24:31

it just premiered on Paramount+. Did you do

24:33

a voice on that? I did not, did

24:35

you? No. Interesting, isn't it?

24:37

It's really interesting. You employ someone for five

24:39

years and then you

24:42

expect to hear that tap tap tap on your

24:44

bedroom door and then it never... What is he

24:46

doing in your home? No,

24:52

it didn't do a voice for that, but hey,

24:54

you know, there's a lot of very talented people

24:56

on it. Very true. All people are. I'm sure.

24:58

Yeah. But they came on to the show to

25:00

talk about Digman, so

25:02

we'll hear a little bit of that. One thing I should

25:05

mention in the clip that we hear where

25:07

we're talking to Andy Samberg is we

25:10

do sing the song Hollywood Facts

25:12

a lot. Yes. And let me explain what it

25:14

is if this is your first or

25:16

second episode of Comedy Bang Bang. I

25:19

don't think you should, but go ahead. Hollywood

25:21

Facts was a game that we played early

25:23

on in the, I

25:25

believe, first 200 episodes or so. Occasionally we

25:28

would play games, and Hollywood Facts was one

25:30

where we would do Hollywood trivia that Neil

25:32

Campbell and I would write. That was all

25:34

fake Hollywood games. I forgot there was a

25:36

game connected to it. Yes, in fact, in

25:38

the Comedy Bang Bang book, which is in

25:41

stores now, there is

25:43

a board game version of Hollywood Facts, and

25:46

Neil and I wrote questions

25:48

for it. And that

25:52

was one of the very last things that we wrote for

25:54

the book, because I remember the

25:56

deadline was right around when my daughter

25:58

was born. And I remember

26:01

being in shopping in a Target in Riverside

26:04

where she was born for baby

26:06

for born in the Target

26:11

No, not the turtle She

26:21

was born in Riverside in the hospital there and I

26:23

was in a Riverside because we thought it was only

26:25

gonna be two Days after we got there and turned

26:28

out to be two weeks. So I was buying clothes Yeah,

26:30

a friend gave you the some bad intel some bad

26:32

intel So I was in a Target buying clothes

26:35

and Neil sent the last batch of questions and

26:37

I remember I was wearing clothes When

26:39

I bought a Target The

26:44

corporate one in Minnesota, yeah Main

26:47

HQ so I remember just receiving

26:49

the email with another batch of these jokes that

26:52

Neil had written and Almost

26:54

crying laughing. They were so funny and So

26:58

it was it was a game that we played in the 200s

27:00

I think in the episodes and

27:03

the first time we ever played it Andy was

27:05

the guest on the episode and so

27:09

You know him being a great in the Lonely

27:11

Island and Saturday Night Live He did a lot

27:13

of raps and hit singles

27:16

as a rapper. So I said, hey, do you

27:18

mind? let's Improv

27:21

a theme for this so we

27:23

improvised the theme to Hollywood factor He

27:25

improvised the the main theme and

27:28

then Adam Pally and I added tags at the

27:30

end And

27:32

then it became a tradition for us anytime. He's on

27:34

the show We sing it and

27:37

there was one particular episode Lauren lapkis was on where

27:39

we sang it over and over and over again until

27:41

we got Memorized in order to memorize it because we

27:43

kept getting the words wrong. So we sang it about

27:45

20 times until we could finally do

27:47

it Totally without looking at

27:49

the words. Yeah, this became a favorites with

27:52

fans and one fan in particular Tatiana

27:55

Maslany who when she met

27:57

Lauren lapkis at a party She

27:59

came to us came up to her and recited the

28:01

Hollywood facts theme interface. And

28:04

so anytime Andy is

28:06

on, I am just waiting for

28:08

him to say either the word Hollywood or

28:16

facts and I have the theme song ready. And

28:19

this time it was not, I was not disappointed.

28:22

We got to it pretty early. So I just

28:24

want to explain what you're hearing. So

28:27

we're going to hear Andy and Neil promoting

28:29

Digman. Then in between the

28:31

clips, Lily Sullivan, this is her first appearance on

28:33

the Countdown. She just give a shout out. I

28:35

don't think so. It's not time for her because

28:37

we're not listening to her in the clips. Okay. All

28:40

right. But she plays a character, Sister

28:42

Margaret. And then the next clip

28:44

we'll hear is Neil Campbell

28:46

himself playing a character

28:49

named Dirty Dog. All

28:52

right. Let's hear it. This is your choice for

28:54

episode number 12. Welcome

28:56

to the show, guys. Andy,

28:59

you've been on the show ever since our early days,

29:01

episode 16. I feel like

29:03

every time I come back, you tell me a fact.

29:07

A Hollywood fact. Wait a minute. Wait a

29:09

minute. Do we need to hear? Oh, I

29:11

think we do. Man, didn't waste much time.

29:15

Going to Inglewood now. Do facts and

29:18

know your stars. Glamour

29:20

and lots of bars. Get

29:23

a drink at a club. Then walk

29:25

in front of the Chinese theater. Hollywood

29:28

facts. Take out your dick. Check out

29:30

the facts. That's the Hollywood facts, bro.

29:32

Pretty good. Considering

29:37

it's been now probably a year and a half

29:40

since you've heard that. Since

29:42

the last episode you were on. You've

29:44

been in every hundo, by the

29:46

way. Is that true? You've

29:48

been on episode 16 was your first. You were in our

29:50

first hundo. And then you were on a 100 episode, a 200, a 300, 400, 500, 600, 700, now 801. I

29:57

can't believe I was on the 16th one. Yeah.

30:00

When I came and did it, in my mind, it was

30:02

like it had already been going forever. I

30:04

believe that you were on

30:06

with, I think, Zach and Andy Daly

30:08

and one other person, Zach Galifianakis and

30:10

one other person. What a dream. I

30:12

think the second time you were on, you were on with Adam Pally and

30:14

you said to me, remember the first time I was on

30:16

it? I was on with all these great people? What

30:20

happened? I said that specifically because

30:22

Pally was doing his worst work

30:24

that day. He was pulling

30:26

like a classic Pally, I don't care move.

30:29

Which I think was from this actual episode

30:31

with Hollywood facts because he was doing bro

30:33

again and let's hear it again. Going

30:36

downtown, going to Inglewood now. Everybody

30:38

check the Jew facts and know

30:40

your stars. Glitz and glamour and

30:43

lots of bars. Get a

30:45

drink at a club, then go walk

30:47

in front of the Chinese theater.

30:50

Hollywood facts, take

30:52

out your dick. Check out the facts.

30:54

It's the Hollywood facts, bro. There

30:56

he is. That was better. So tell

30:59

me about Digman. It's obviously an animated show that

31:01

I saw the trailer to, but what more do

31:03

we know about it? That's

31:05

just some of the footage from the show. You think

31:07

that the show is just... I watched it the whole

31:09

season, right? No, no, no, no. There's

31:11

other animated scenes. It's not just re-editing that

31:14

two minutes of footage. It's not you guys

31:16

talking in between these animated scenes I already

31:18

watched? No, no, not at all. One

31:20

episode is, but the rest aren't. Yeah. Oh, wow. That

31:22

one the network does not like. Do

31:25

you think the fans will? Doubtful. But

31:27

I like the idea that there could be fans. Now,

31:31

what is it about though? When I see a

31:34

title called Digman, I think to

31:36

myself like, I don't know what

31:38

the hell this is about. I'm just going to turn it off. But

31:43

it actually is about something. It is about

31:45

something. And something important. And

31:48

it's an acronym. Yep,

31:50

it's an acronym. We won't say what it stands

31:52

for though. Oh, Digman is an acronym. Yeah, but

31:55

that's like a season five reveal. Oh, really? Okay.

31:57

We won't tell you what each letter stands for,

31:59

but we will. will tell you the M stands

32:01

for modoc. Well that's

32:03

an acronym in itself. Yeah, they

32:05

kind of need letters. Each letter

32:07

is an already existing acronym?

32:09

Yeah, exactly. Oh my gosh. We have

32:11

a lot of ideas. We're fucking weird.

32:15

So it's like I-IBM? Don't

32:17

spoil it. Maybe. Gosh, wow,

32:19

this is incredible. D is dare. Dare

32:22

for, yeah, dare to keep kids

32:24

off drugs. Yeah, okay, wow, this is great.

32:27

Dare, IBM. Oh

32:30

God, we're struggling to come up with a G. Fuck

32:33

yeah. You're a great guy. GPS. GPS

32:36

in your face. God, fuck you. Fuck

32:38

you in your fucking face. And

32:40

then modoc. And then modoc. Yeah. Um,

32:43

so... And then CLU. And then

32:45

N. NAMBLA.

32:49

NCAA. NAMBLA. Sorry

32:53

guys, it's NAMBLA. I gotta do it

32:55

first forever now. That's our word. And

32:58

that's why it's still the animation show.

33:04

Neil Campbell had to go, but we have,

33:06

our next guest is ready to go here. And he's

33:08

never been on the show before. Welcome him. This

33:12

is Dirty Dog. Hey, it's

33:14

me, Dirty Dog, Bark Bark. Hey, Bark Bark. What

33:18

is up indeed? Hey, let's

33:20

first describe my appearance. Shit, let's do it.

33:22

Six foot three. Yep. So that's

33:24

a normal height. I'm

33:26

a Doberman. You are a Doberman, of

33:28

course, yeah. Standing on my back legs. That's right.

33:30

Yeah, very tall for a Dober. Dovable abs. Uh-huh.

33:35

Spike collar. Kind of six packy looking in

33:37

a way. Yeah, six pack. Yeah. Bark

33:40

bark. Bark bark, of course. Yeah, what'd you say

33:42

about the collar? Spike collar. Spike's collar, yeah. Also,

33:45

you're wearing a t-shirt. Like a doggy

33:47

t-shirt. What's it say on that? Because I'm only

33:49

seeing your front. What's it say on the back?

33:51

Where people can usually see it. You're

33:54

asking what it says on the back or on the

33:56

front? Well, on the back because doggy t-shirts have things

33:59

written on the back. Oh yeah, because usually

34:01

they're not on their hind legs. It's bad to

34:03

the bone, bark bark. Let me

34:05

guess, picture of a bone? Picture of

34:07

a bone, yeah, and an arrow. And

34:10

an arrow from the word bone to the bone, just

34:12

in case you don't get it. Oh, got it, got

34:14

it, got it. I

34:17

thought you meant like an arrow that an archer would shoot. This

34:20

ain't no William Till situation, bark bark.

34:22

Okay, good stuff. Hey, this is Andy.

34:24

Hey Andy, bark bark, how's it going?

34:26

It's good. Yeah. Yeah,

34:28

and this is... I recognize a little dirty dog, bark

34:30

bark. Oh no. I guess

34:33

you're a dirty dog, Andy. This

34:35

is Sister Margaret. Hey Sister Margaret. Hi, hi.

34:38

Hi, bark bark. I

34:40

like your charts, I like your vibe. Thanks.

34:43

Do you like my jean shorts, bark bark? I do, they're

34:45

so charged. Yeah, I get cut a little hole from my

34:47

tails to get out the back. Will

34:49

you cut the hole or do you buy them like this? Cut

34:51

it out myself. So, these are human

34:53

shorts that you're cutting a hole out of.

34:55

These are Levi's 511 jeans. Cut off. I

35:00

know about the 501. They're vintage. Oh, they're skinny.

35:03

Oh, 511s are the skinny ones, yeah. Well,

35:06

it's great to have you on the show. Tell

35:09

us about yourself. Hey, I'm a dirty dog. I

35:11

like getting it on. Sure.

35:14

I like every juice there is. Every

35:17

juice, so orange juice. Orange juice, but also

35:19

the nasty juices. Okay, all right. I see

35:21

what you're saying. But you do like orange

35:23

juice. And I like orange juice. Apple

35:27

juice. And then the nasty

35:29

juices as well. Pomegranate. Pomegranate

35:31

juice, yes. Plum

35:33

juice. Do they make plum juice? They

35:36

do where I'm from, bark bark. Where

35:38

is my balls, Dick? What?

35:42

There's my plum juice, bark bark. You're

35:44

from your bard juice. Oh, I'm from someone else's.

35:47

I was made out of someone else's plum juice. Where

35:50

else are some of the balls when you think about it? When you

35:52

think about it, yeah, you have them sisters like you.

35:54

Yeah, that's true. And

35:56

what did you see on the show today? Hey, I'm here

35:58

for one nasty little reason. And

36:02

what do you think about the dirty dog sorry big

36:04

dog is a different guest we've had on dirty. What

36:06

do you think about dirty? Dog so well, I'm I'm

36:09

kind of reserving judgment until we hear the one

36:11

that has you reason. Yeah. Oh, all right I

36:14

like this guy. He's a dirty dog. I can tell hey All

36:18

right, my one little nasty reason that I'm here I

36:22

Gotta remind kids you got to do your homework Oh

36:26

Okay Yeah,

36:31

I mean I was expecting something different but I

36:33

can't argue with it Yeah, I mean kids should

36:35

do their homework I mean, especially if they want

36:37

to get good grades, right it depends on the

36:39

assignment. I mean speaking as a former student Yeah,

36:41

yeah, although can you really pick and choose which

36:44

homework to do or should you just do it

36:46

all? I mean it depends what you

36:48

what you want to get out of The

36:50

experience of school right sure I guess

36:52

there's sometimes when you could say like,

36:54

you know what? I'm not gonna

36:57

be a chemist Exactly, you know, why do I

36:59

why do I need an A on this although

37:01

getting into a good college? Although what with student

37:03

loans now being what they are. I don't know

37:05

that I would maybe better off just going to

37:07

trade school Yeah, exactly. I would agree with all

37:09

that. I would just add What

37:15

do you think sister Margaret I mean About

37:18

college about homework in general,

37:21

I think how America's a good thing if

37:23

you're a nerd You

37:27

were so cool, I mean you are very sexy

37:29

in that that slit all the way up to your

37:37

But by the way, I think you cut into your actual

37:39

head because you're bleeding Yeah,

37:41

yeah, I like blood though. Don't you

37:43

God likes it? Hey, it's one of the juices I'm

37:47

the nasty juices. Yeah, especially a certain

37:49

week per month. Am I right? Are

37:51

you talking about periods? Are

37:56

you jealous that we get him a new daughter stop dirty dog

37:58

off that ass From

38:01

was. A

38:03

shower, nail bowers, Bauer

38:07

is our bowers, our

38:09

success, As

38:14

you haven't decided if only supposed

38:17

a lottery or not we're on.e

38:19

O S Athletic your dirty Dog

38:21

Now or Farm System. We've since

38:23

since tissue hours performed. By

38:27

have multiple things has a thing or

38:29

hogan is. Exists you have multiple do

38:31

As far as I'm mark in

38:33

our bauer center for desert. The

38:37

result of the jewish so says you

38:39

is a bad deal. Understand why sometimes

38:41

they would have another school be able

38:43

to decode egg. There are parts. Of

38:46

yeah yeah yeah yeah Do your homework knows they

38:48

I'd at Mike Martz. Oh, wait

38:50

a minute, I see what's happening

38:52

here. Sound: You're tired of being

38:54

blamed for eating homework. Yeah.

38:58

Kids. He added you know what healthy eater delegated

39:00

art market so you don't care about the kids

39:02

are about how dare you are. One

39:05

part notice or coalition and about

39:07

perfect is over parts of arcs.

39:09

the for three hours it's embark

39:12

mouth or user. Three things use

39:14

as far. As

39:16

I haven't cracked the code yet as

39:18

I'm wondering how didn't see or hear

39:20

hear all your self interested in not

39:22

being blamed for eating the homework. Sure,

39:25

that's one way of looking at it, but

39:27

another way of looking at it. In.

39:30

Black and White? my you can't

39:32

see color? Sure sure. How does

39:34

your does have a dog or

39:36

sniff. Is a kid.

39:38

You do their homework. They want to grow up getting

39:40

a job. Way. Way way kids

39:42

will grow up regardless of if they do their

39:45

home great. I mean I mean old are you

39:47

certain is a small percentage of kids who don't

39:49

grow up? I don't know why we're focusing on

39:51

that bus. it's has some not a bug eyed

39:54

but kids will grow up regardless. But they said

39:56

they sued the Grow Up and Do their homework.

39:58

So the yeah, I guess I. So they

40:01

grow up dot dot dot and get a good job and get

40:03

to get a good job learn how to do the taxes Yeah

40:08

with turbo tax though you can just pretty much pay

40:11

someone to do turbo that snail Do

40:14

you like snails? I like the

40:16

animated movie turbo But

40:19

a snail that raises Have

40:22

you ever eaten a snail? Yep bark bark Like

40:25

in a French restaurant, yeah, it's not go And

40:30

what about not in a restaurant just like off the sidewalk?

40:32

Yep, and what's the difference? mmm

40:36

the butter We're

40:41

at a French restaurant or okay, so a

40:43

butterless Street, yeah, but

40:45

with streets nail bark bark And

40:48

did you like that as much or no no, so

40:50

you like it better with the buff better

40:52

with butter That's not

40:54

one thing That's

40:57

a nice better with butter it'd be better with

40:59

butter. That's true, but I gotta point out hey,

41:01

hey, that was something you say You

41:05

point out everything your guests Had

41:13

it previously said dirty dog do you have

41:15

owners? Hey only

41:18

one owns a dirty dog dirty

41:21

dog Okay,

41:24

okay, so you you're a

41:26

street dog you know, yeah, so would

41:28

you like to have a forever home?

41:31

No, what are you talking about? That is crazy. Park.

41:33

I just we're looking for a third dog and I

41:36

You know, I mean we have room here That's

41:38

the house doesn't matter that I can talk and I walk

41:40

on my hind legs This is creepy

41:42

that you'd want to own him I'd

41:45

like for you to be my property No

41:48

way Oh

41:51

you call yourself Dee Dee, okay. Yeah. All

41:53

right. Yeah, Daredevil by the way, it was

41:55

in contact Dee Dee ain't

41:57

taking that deal. Also a catchphrase or is that just half?

42:00

have in conversationally. I have a t-shirt that have that

42:02

printed on it. Yeah, I call it like you.

42:06

Yeah. Do you ever call yourself double D? Yes,

42:10

sometimes when I'm in heat, I'll say that.

42:12

When you're in heat, you call yourself double D.

42:14

Yeah. Like double D.

42:16

Interesting. Yeah, so I

42:19

mean, what do you do for

42:21

a living? Do you do, I mean, or just for kids to

42:23

do their homework, go around to school. So you get paid for

42:25

this. Yeah. Do assemblies of a different

42:27

school. Oh, oh. Do you have

42:29

a problem with your homework? Do you mind if

42:32

we hear some of your program? Like you must

42:34

fill an hour, right? Or a 45 minute lunch

42:36

class or something? Oh, it's like three hours. Yeah.

42:39

Okay. Let's hear a tiny sliver of it.

42:41

Bark, bark. Okay. A

42:43

little bit more. Oh, more than that. More

42:45

than that. Hey, this is

42:47

a dirty dog. Bark, bark. Kids, you

42:49

got to do your homework. Don't say I

42:51

ate it. Okay.

42:56

Yeah. Did you do new

42:58

stuff? You never knew. Number

43:01

one to. Dirty

43:04

dog, Paul. Bark, bark. Dirty dog, bark,

43:07

bark. All

43:09

right. Good stuff. We're going to

43:12

take a break. When we come back, we're not going to crack the

43:14

top 10 yet. Do you know what? Can

43:16

I say something? What's that? You should use their thing

43:18

if we come back. If we come back. To give

43:21

people like. Oh my god. Are they not

43:23

coming back? Yes, keep them listening. If I

43:25

just quit in the middle of a countdown

43:27

episode. Absolutely. Absolutely.

43:30

It would be so interesting. Just like the episode ends and they go,

43:32

what happened? And then I never come back. One of these, I think

43:34

you should do that at some point. I don't think you should

43:36

never come back, but you don't say when you're going to come

43:39

back. Oh yeah. And

43:41

so it keeps people on their toes. That's

43:43

why I like a nervous edgy listener. Yeah.

43:46

Oh, what's that? When if

43:49

we come back, we're not going

43:51

to crack the top 10, but we will crack the top 11. That's

43:54

very exciting. Hey, you can't say fairer than that.

43:56

We'll be right back. This.

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45:01

Some of the welcome back recovery

45:03

oh hey. Guys

45:05

just bought me a you are vague versa

45:08

that I enjoy. He was very fun I

45:10

enjoyed as we have a good time together.

45:12

We. Do have a good time together. know your characters and

45:14

I. Don't. Always have a good time

45:16

to that's I think it seems to lot. It

45:19

well mainly because. Your characters

45:21

got so contentious with me. We.

45:23

Now have to say to each other, hey we

45:25

like each other Stats during new that's when you

45:27

get consensus of my character. So.

45:30

Uses Islam does are one way streets

45:32

got it true. But the the very.

45:36

That. The way the show was constructed is

45:38

I'm the same or person and then crazy

45:40

people come in and I have to be

45:42

the one saying like say hey hey, that

45:44

isn't right. i don't think

45:46

that's actually true you don't think so i

45:48

don't see how do you think it's i

45:50

think you say some insane so i try

45:52

to get it in there and was no

45:54

just to make the show fun for me

45:56

with yes success or you certainly didn't have

45:58

a lot of Come on. Well,

46:04

let's get to

46:06

it. I mean, I feel like this

46:08

conversation is naturally leading us to the

46:10

next episode. Big naturally leading us. What'd

46:13

you say? Thick naturally? Big

46:15

naturally. Oh, big naturally. Oh, big natty.

46:18

To really... Is this big natty leading us?

46:21

Is this big getty Lee? Did you know I

46:23

just discovered this the other night? I'm not getty

46:26

Lee? There's some new discoveries to be made? I'm

46:28

breaking getty Lee news. I discovered by accident. I

46:38

was not looking for this information. This is

46:40

like the vaccine. What was that first vaccine?

46:42

It was by accident, right? Polio? Yeah,

46:45

wasn't it? Yeah, the string cheese vaccine? Yeah.

46:48

I saw getty Lee tagged

46:50

in a photo on Instagram, and

46:53

his Instagram handle is

46:55

gettyimages. That's

46:58

funny. Yeah. I love that.

47:00

That's fucking great. Getty, if you're listening

47:02

and we know you are, let's see. Come on, Comedy

47:04

Bank. I can only... There's one member

47:07

of Rush that I always forget. I remember

47:09

getty Lee. I remember Neil Pert. Yeah. Alex

47:11

Lifeson. And he has the best name

47:14

in a way. Lifeson. But

47:17

isn't it L-E-I-F? I

47:20

think it's L-I-F-E. Really? I think it's

47:22

L-I-F-E. Really? Really? Alex.

47:25

Yeah, L-I-F-E. Canadian musician, they call it. Oh,

47:27

come on. He's a little more

47:30

famous than just Canadian musician. He's

47:32

in fucking Rush. Okay, look up Paul McCartney.

47:34

See what they say. Okay, let me see. Paul

47:38

McCartney. English singer,

47:40

songwriter, and musician. See? Come

47:43

on, guys. Skip a little. He's a

47:46

fucking beetle. All right, let's

47:50

get to it. This is your choice for episode number 11.

47:53

Number one, one. All right,

47:55

episode number 11, Paul. This is episode

47:57

838. Yeah,

48:00

this is a rough one. A

48:02

rough one, you think? 830. Now, the last

48:04

one we heard was 801, so

48:06

this is 30, I mean, this is

48:09

37 later. Yeah. And this is

48:11

from November 12 of this year, 2023. Would

48:15

it surprise you to know this is

48:18

the second most recent episode eligible for

48:20

inclusion? No. So

48:22

the last two episodes that were eligible- Not that surprising to me.

48:24

Not that surprising. No. All right.

48:27

Well, I mean, how surprised am I supposed to be, darling? You

48:29

know? We've been doing this 15 years. Oh, come on, here. Nothing

48:33

surprising. I've seen it all. Would it surprise

48:35

you to know that the title of this

48:37

episode is Peter Pogg-Donovich? Fuck! That

48:39

surprised me. Uh-huh. That's

48:42

right. You're in this one, Paul. I remember this one. Well, yeah,

48:44

it was only like a month ago. I remember you- I

48:47

want to do my impression of

48:50

the fence, the

48:53

stolen goods fence in Emerald Ranch in

48:55

Red Dead Redemption 2, who

48:57

every time you meet him,

49:00

you go to sell some shit to

49:02

him, like some Platinum watches or whatever.

49:04

Oh, I was imagining an actual perimeter

49:06

fence. That's why I tried to provide

49:08

some qualifiers- Thank you. I kind of

49:10

knew you were going to think that. But for a good 60 seconds, I was like- Yeah,

49:13

yeah, yeah. This is a crazy game. It

49:15

doesn't talk to the fence. But it's a video game, so we can

49:17

have it. Don't sell on goods. And every time you encounter him,

49:19

he goes, I remember

49:21

you. Been a long time. He

49:25

kind of sounds like George W. Bush. Even if you had just

49:27

been there. Yeah.

49:29

You can go to him, leave, turn right

49:31

around, go back again. Oh,

49:33

I remember you. Yeah, dude. From

49:36

two seconds ago? Guess what? I'm the only

49:38

person who ever deals with you at all.

49:40

So, yeah, of course you remember me. Your

49:44

job is to wait here for me to show

49:46

up. I imagine that's

49:49

what you would say if you were having

49:51

an argument with your parent who has Alzheimer's

49:53

or something. Your job is

49:55

to remember when I show up. Your

49:59

parent? Yeah, of

50:01

course you remember me. Your

50:04

job is to remember me. That's funny. If a parrot

50:06

said that, I remember you. That's

50:12

the only thing the parrot said. I remember

50:14

you. Every single time you

50:16

come back from school. Oh, hey, I remember

50:18

you. I'm going to start doing this. Oh,

50:20

that's adorable. Oh, I remember you. You going to do it

50:22

to Emmy? Yeah, I think so. This

50:26

is, okay, Peter Pogdanovich, you remember this one.

50:28

This is with our good friend Edgar Wright.

50:30

That's right. Director of

50:32

such films as Baby Driver,

50:35

Scott Pilgrim, and Hot

50:38

Fuzz, and Shaun of the Dead,

50:41

The World's End. He's

50:44

a big fan of the show. He's been coming

50:46

on since- Last night in Soho. Last night in

50:48

Soho. He's been coming on since our second year,

50:50

I believe was his first time. A Fist Full

50:52

of Fingers. Mm-hmm. Yeah. He's

50:55

done it all. And also an actor

50:57

in Sing, too. That's right. Which

50:59

comes up on this. I believe, in

51:01

fact, before we hear

51:03

this clip, Edgar and

51:05

I were talking about pitching an idea

51:07

for a sequel to Sing, too, which

51:10

I believe comes up in the clip we'll hear,

51:12

but the reference to it, that's what we were

51:14

talking about. I respect your beliefs. So

51:17

we're going to talk to Edgar Wright a little bit, and

51:19

then you'll hear a clip with

51:21

Paul F. here. Hi. Great

51:24

Grant. What is it? No, Grant.

51:28

Now you just want me to stop. I don't want

51:31

to hear it again. Grand nephew. Yeah,

51:34

I'm a grand nephew. Oh,

51:36

no, no. Grand uncle. What is a grand

51:38

uncle? What is a grand uncle? You'll

51:42

hear PFT- Oh, oh, oh, no. We're not

51:45

going to hear this clip, but- What?

51:48

Paul F. as Brock comes

51:51

in. We're not going to hear this clip

51:53

because we're going to hear from Brock a little later in the countdown.

51:56

So we're first going to hear us talking

51:58

to Edgar Wright. Then

52:00

the next clip, Brock will have already come

52:03

in. We're

52:05

going to jump to Vic

52:07

Michaelis as Quiet the Mime. Quiet

52:13

the Mime, Paul. Is it Quiet the Mime or

52:15

Quiet the Mime? It is Quiet the

52:17

Mime. It's Quiet the Mime who is Quiet the Mime.

52:19

Yes, exactly. Yes, that's the joke they make. So

52:22

and this one had us rolling. Vic

52:25

just kind of... This one

52:27

had us rolling. Had

52:30

not only Paul and I who were easy laughs rolling,

52:34

but Edgar was

52:37

dying at this. Let's hear it. This

52:39

is your choice for episode number 11. Number

52:41

one, one. Please

52:43

welcome back to the show Edgar Wright.

52:45

Hello. Thanks for having me again. Scott

52:47

Pilgrim is back. Incredible.

52:50

He was away for a while. Scott

52:55

Pilgrim is back. And he's back

52:58

in drawn form. Where

53:00

he started. Yes. Tell us

53:02

about this. What's going on? Because suddenly I'm

53:05

sitting there on my phone in

53:08

the morning. I

53:10

have my newborn baby in my arms.

53:13

And suddenly an alert comes

53:15

up on my phone that this new cartoon

53:17

is out with all of the cast of

53:19

the movie and you're a part of it.

53:21

And I dropped my phone. Not my baby.

53:24

I held onto my baby. What is happening here?

53:26

What is going on? Well,

53:28

it's one of the producers Jared called me

53:31

and said, is there anything more we can

53:33

do with Scott Pilgrim? Just to interject, this

53:35

is not Jared from Subway, right? I just

53:37

want to make sure. Okay.

53:41

Because if you were a producer, I would have to

53:43

say I'm not watching this. He's

53:46

not involved at all, right? He's not a star. He doesn't

53:48

have his big pants. No. Oh

53:51

my gosh. You're

53:54

coughing. You're

53:57

so gassed at this question. that

54:00

is not the show. Although I would like

54:02

to see that show. Maybe the

54:04

doggy cops from the thing can track him down.

54:07

Yes, oh my god, a crossover there. This is

54:09

good. Scott Pilgrim. Scott Pilgrim. I would say because

54:11

it's Alan Friday that I would say to just

54:13

watch it because it's kind of a nice one

54:15

to go into blindly. So it's not the same

54:17

plot as the movie. No, it's not the same

54:19

plot as the comics. It sort of goes off

54:22

on its own thing. So it

54:24

kind of starts in a similar vein to

54:26

the book, the books and

54:28

the film and then does its

54:30

own thing. So I think people

54:32

will be surprised and delighted that

54:34

Jared Fogle is not anything. Everyone's

54:36

tuning in wondering if he is.

54:38

Personally, I watch any television show

54:40

going, is Jared Fogle in this

54:42

or not? I am

54:44

99% of the time. I hope

54:46

so. Otherwise, I'm

54:49

locking my doors tonight. That makes it too

54:51

easy for the doggy cops from Thing 3.

54:54

If he's already in prison, there's my film.

54:58

Okay, so we got to get him out. In real

55:00

life. So the start of the movie is he breaks

55:02

out. Yes. And he slips through the

55:04

bars. He loses so much weight eating Subway sandwiches. He

55:06

slips through the bars. And he throws his big pants

55:08

out of the prison window. And he climbs down. Yes.

55:11

And then the cops have the big pants. Wait, does

55:13

he have more than one pair of big pants that

55:15

he can tie them together to form a little? Yeah,

55:17

that's the one thing he asked for. Can I bring

55:19

these to prison? Everyone said yes, of

55:21

course. It's

55:24

like Survivor where you can bring one thing.

55:28

Remember that when you could bring one thing to

55:30

Survivor? The people at Netflix, the

55:32

amount of times Jared Fogle has been mentioned

55:34

whilst trying to plug the show, they just kill

55:37

themselves. Although I'm sure they have

55:39

a million documentaries about him. We

55:44

need to get to our next guest. They are an

55:46

artist. They are a visual artist.

55:48

Please welcome to the show for the first

55:50

time, Quiet the Mime. Bonjour, Quatre, quelle mon.

55:52

Oh, hello. Wow. Chatea,

55:55

how are you doing? Oh,

55:57

you're... French

56:00

person. Oh,

56:02

wow. I've been to Montreal.

56:06

Oh, I've been to Montreal. Oh,

56:08

I've been to the german. I've been to the

56:10

german city of beautiful cities. Is

56:12

it really beautiful? I had no opinion but

56:14

I have heard that this is a beautiful city. Oh, beautiful

56:16

cities. How are you?

56:20

I'm great, I'm great. Welcome

56:22

to This Is Edgar, This Is Brock. Bonjour.

56:26

Monsieur correct. Hello, Soggyman. I

56:28

don't know if it's all right. I'm too

56:30

great for work. Didn't have time to change.

56:36

Quiet. Should I call you quiet? Is that what you

56:38

should be known as? Is that

56:40

what is written down? Well, quiet the mime.

56:42

I don't want to say quiet the mime all the time. No,

56:44

maybe I should. This is my name, quiet

56:46

the mime. It's a short name. Short

56:48

name? Short name. I'm quiet

56:50

the mime because I am quiet the mime. Oh, hey. Wonderful.

56:59

And the art that you are a mime. It's not just

57:01

your name, right? Okay.

57:07

And this is essentially your question. Oh,

57:10

oh, oh, oh. And

57:12

here we go. And here we go. And

57:16

now I box. Yeah, it's more

57:18

like you're dancing a little bit. It's kind of

57:20

locking and popping. Here's an

57:23

example of this memory for you. Knock,

57:26

knock. Wait, why did I

57:28

say that? I don't

57:31

know what's happening right now. Open the door. Hello. Welcome

57:33

to my home. It is a small

57:35

home but a home nonetheless. So that is sort

57:37

of an example of what he looks like.

57:40

Okay. So wait. You

57:43

open the door and then

57:46

we walked into your home and then you showed us around. I

57:49

didn't invite you in. I don't know if you're a vampire.

57:51

So you don't invite anyone in in your mime. Well,

57:54

you know, we just sort of double check.

57:56

It's a little pretend, right? So you sort of

57:58

create a reality. Let's go again.

58:01

Knock, knock. Who's that? Who's

58:03

that? And now,

58:05

see, this was a trap

58:07

because I was cutting my own bathroom in this

58:10

scenario, so I'm looking to try and get out.

58:12

So you two are listening. Oh, you're locked in there.

58:14

Oh, I am. Do we have the key or do we

58:16

need to... Which is why I think in miming the conversational

58:18

part is so important. Oh,

58:20

okay. Yeah. Can I just listen

58:22

to your pronunciation of we one more time? Oh,

58:25

yeah. Thank you. Wow. So

58:28

how did you get into miming? I mean, did

58:31

you just start one day or...

58:34

Well, you know, I suppose on the

58:36

television, I saw that people doing... Okay,

58:39

in Montreal, we have a...

58:42

Just for a half hour.

58:46

And so... And a just for

58:48

half hour. A youth warrior. Okay. Okay.

58:52

So here's

58:55

a thing called just for life gigs. They are

58:57

very funny. Oh, I love just

58:59

for life gigs. I

59:02

have been just for life gigs. Okay, very.

59:05

I believe I was on an airplane in Thailand. I

59:07

was an English boy in the hospital and I

59:09

started looking at the television. And what I

59:11

do see is a couple. And

59:15

one of the people in the couple is going into a

59:17

party. And he enters the party and

59:19

then he is in the party. So

59:22

a temporary structure comes to the entrance

59:24

of the party. And so when he

59:26

exits the party, what does he see?

59:28

A bathroom full of people. Like he

59:30

is walking into a meeting when he

59:32

is really just walking out of a

59:34

party. And I said, that is the funniest

59:36

thing I have ever seen in my life. So

59:38

funny. And then a green monster pulls the curtain

59:41

away. And then we're into the next one.

59:43

The next gag. And then it is the next gag. Oh,

59:45

totally silent. And I said, you know, I think

59:48

I would like to do this. I mean, that's

59:50

not mime, that silent comedy. But what does it

59:52

have to do with mime? Well, I

59:54

thought for me, I

59:56

tried to do things in television medium and

59:58

I said, don't do. They

1:00:01

said, don't do anything on

1:00:03

television? No. Now, was

1:00:05

that you saying yes, or was that

1:00:07

you crying when they told you not

1:00:10

to do anything on television? Correct.

1:00:13

And so I think for me it is

1:00:15

something that they said, listen, you have a

1:00:17

space for a pepper bag. And so I... Oh,

1:00:20

no. Well, I can't be

1:00:22

on television anymore. So what do I do? I

1:00:24

become a prime. And I am so

1:00:27

good at being a mime skeptical man. Is

1:00:29

this podcast the only place that you've ever performed? Well,

1:00:32

I would argue professionally I prefer

1:00:34

to park all the time. Sure.

1:00:36

Do you get paid to do it in the park? Sometimes.

1:00:39

Okay. Well, then yes. I mean, is

1:00:41

it busking though? Is that primarily what you're up to? Sure,

1:00:44

yes, absolutely. And

1:00:46

what I'll do is I'll mime

1:00:48

pulling a little ice cream cone

1:00:50

out of my

1:00:52

ice cream cone holder. And I'll

1:00:55

get a uni or a uni from someone and

1:00:57

I will hand off the ice cream cone and

1:00:59

pull that sort of part of my practice. You

1:01:02

hand off like the sort of pretend ice cream cone.

1:01:04

Well, yes. I pretend that there

1:01:06

is a physical ice cream cone in

1:01:08

my hand. That you've pulled out

1:01:11

of an ice cream cone holder. Why? And

1:01:13

then I do physically pull an ice cream

1:01:15

cone out of my ice cream cone holder.

1:01:18

Okay. So you have one mime one

1:01:20

and one actual one? Well, it is mostly just

1:01:22

an actual one. And sometimes I just miss...

1:01:25

The freezer freezes my hand so cold I can't

1:01:27

feel if there are. Can I interject?

1:01:29

It seems to me like you're just selling ice cream in

1:01:31

the park. Is that what you're saying? Well, that's

1:01:33

what my dad says. Well, you're not

1:01:35

the guy from the Chicago song. Saturday

1:01:38

in the park? A man

1:01:40

selling ice cream? A man selling ice cream.

1:01:43

No, I'm the guy from the musical

1:01:45

Sonder and the Parker Josh. Okay.

1:01:48

Just you and me here. What? Do

1:01:50

you sing any Italian song? Oh, I do. You're

1:01:53

sure you're not the guy from the Chicago song? I

1:01:55

don't think so. I don't know the reference. It

1:01:58

sounds to me like you're an ice cream salesman. person

1:02:02

primarily, which is not bad. I mean, everyone

1:02:04

needs to start somewhere, but I

1:02:06

mean, it doesn't even sound like you're miming in the

1:02:08

park. You're just pulling out ice cream and giving them,

1:02:11

getting toonies from it. Well,

1:02:13

sure, it's part of my day job, but I

1:02:15

do lots of professional miming outside of that. Oh,

1:02:18

okay. Like what? Do you know

1:02:20

Open Mic Nights? Sure. I've performed

1:02:22

it a few in my day. So I pay

1:02:24

$100 every

1:02:27

night, unless I can bring two friends and then they

1:02:30

sit in the front row and then I get to

1:02:32

do my act. This is a pay to

1:02:34

play situation. This is not Open Mic, it sounds like. Well,

1:02:36

it's an Open Mic in the sense

1:02:38

that yes, I am paying to be

1:02:41

a part of it. And

1:02:43

the place is open while you're performing? Well, I'm doing

1:02:45

it correct. And there is a mic. And there

1:02:47

is a microphone sometimes. Sometimes the venues are so

1:02:49

small. Do you need the microphone? Two small for a

1:02:51

microphone? Yeah. Tiny venues. So

1:02:57

what was your question? You need a microphone though because

1:02:59

you're a mime. Yes, and he's so quiet.

1:03:01

You want to see me do some of my act? Yeah,

1:03:03

I would love to. Okay. This is a rope.

1:03:05

Do you see? Yeah. And

1:03:07

I'm pulling the rope. You're just pulling on the

1:03:10

mic cord right now. I don't know what you

1:03:12

want. I think the part is that he's also

1:03:14

saying what he's doing. Yeah.

1:03:16

Yeah. I mean, mimes are usually

1:03:18

so quiet that it is apparent what they're doing

1:03:20

when they're doing it. And we're like, oh my

1:03:22

God, I can't believe the thing that they're actually

1:03:24

doing is not actually in the hands. How many

1:03:26

mimes do you know, Scott? That's

1:03:29

a good point. Probably only

1:03:31

zero. Sure. But I will say, two

1:03:33

sets. One,

1:03:37

this is a, how do you say, an

1:03:40

audio medium, correct? Yes. So

1:03:42

I just want to make sure that your audience

1:03:44

knows that I'm doing it so well. So I,

1:03:46

you know, maybe I go, you know, like, oh,

1:03:48

I'm holding a cup and my hand is grasping.

1:03:50

You're actually holding a cup. I'm

1:03:53

saying it's not, but I'm letting them know because it's an

1:03:55

audio medium. I mean, mime is, is like,

1:03:57

you know, like this is me holding a cup,

1:03:59

right? You can tell that there's a cup. There's supposed to be a

1:04:01

cup. Whoa! And

1:04:06

then I put it up to my lips and I go,

1:04:08

and then I like. Are you kidding me with this? And

1:04:11

I wipe my lips like, oh yeah, oh

1:04:13

wow. That's pretty good, Skeleton. That's great water.

1:04:16

Okay, but it's very much in there. Great water. Okay,

1:04:18

here I am, I'm in the studio and

1:04:20

I'm maiming, clapping my hands. You're

1:04:22

literally clapping right now. Skeleton,

1:04:25

don't know what you want from me. What I

1:04:27

want is traditional maiming. Maybe you're doing a new

1:04:29

kind of maim where you're not actually miming things.

1:04:31

I am miming very well by

1:04:34

my standards of maim. By

1:04:36

your standards. I am. But

1:04:39

by anyone else's standards, this is bad

1:04:41

maim. So you? By

1:04:44

anyone else's standards, I mean. To

1:04:47

me, Edgar, Brock. It's like closed

1:04:49

captioning maim. It's for everybody, right?

1:04:51

I guess so. Don't come, Mr. Wright.

1:04:54

Look at this. Okay, here we go.

1:04:56

That's it. I'm a maimer. I

1:04:59

guess. You're not against disabled people. No,

1:05:02

Brock. Accessibility. Okay,

1:05:04

sure. Yeah,

1:05:06

it's for, it's miming for everyone on

1:05:08

a podcast. Now here is my

1:05:10

issue right now. As you see, my arms are both in

1:05:13

casts. Yeah, what happened here?

1:05:15

Are you able to scratch the scab on your nose with this?

1:05:18

No, it's been tough. I've been doing it. That's

1:05:20

going to heal. Because of the bar. Because of

1:05:23

the bar. So here's what I'm saying is I have the

1:05:25

biggest show maker here coming up. Oh, wow.

1:05:28

Yes. It is a miming show. I

1:05:32

got on the showcase. You got

1:05:34

on the showcase? The Jupyria? The

1:05:37

Jupyria showcase, yeah. Wow. I got

1:05:39

on the showcase. It's

1:05:42

just for left Vancouver. Do you

1:05:44

think Vincent will be there? The monster? Vincent

1:05:46

the monster? Oh, a little green monster. I

1:05:49

love him. He won't be there, I think, because

1:05:51

he's in Vancouver, which is at the shoot of the main just

1:05:53

for left. He probably won't be there in person, but

1:05:55

he will have some stuff that he's still editing. He's so funny.

1:05:58

Maybe one of his helpers will be there. He's a monster. Yeah. I

1:06:00

love it when the mascot is as

1:06:02

funny as the performers. Yeah. To

1:06:05

me, watching Just For Laughs gags, there's

1:06:08

no difference between how funny the gags are and how

1:06:10

funny Vincent is. I didn't

1:06:12

know his name is Vincent. Oh yeah, of course it

1:06:14

is. Vincent the Little Crane

1:06:17

Monster. Yeah. What are we going to

1:06:19

ask? Yeah, you say sometimes it's funnier when

1:06:21

the mascots are funnier than the

1:06:23

people. Are we sort of like your little

1:06:25

mascots? In a way, yeah.

1:06:27

I mean, you're funnier than me. Yeah. So

1:06:30

yeah, I guess so. Yeah. You're kind of like

1:06:32

my mascots. Yeah. Oh my God. You admit it. Yeah.

1:06:34

You're like the minions of, and

1:06:36

I'm Gru. Wow. Gru

1:06:39

is funny in his own right, but he's kind of cranky. He's

1:06:41

my favorite mime. You like

1:06:43

Gru. Gru is my favorite mime.

1:06:46

I don't know that he's a mime. I mean, he's carrying

1:06:49

suitcases and all. He's French. He is French. Yeah,

1:06:51

that's a good point. He does. He does. Primarily

1:06:53

he was Gru's number four. Is

1:06:56

that what he does? I, look, I dare

1:06:58

you. Please send

1:07:00

me pictures of Gru carrying a suitcase. I

1:07:02

know he has to at least in one movie.

1:07:05

No, he does some excellent rhyming sort of

1:07:08

the girls in the movie when we've running

1:07:10

around and he sort of wave his arms

1:07:12

to and fro. It's very, very amusing. Yeah.

1:07:14

So, so you have this big show coming up.

1:07:16

Why? How are you preparing? Well,

1:07:19

you know, it's kind of hard because both

1:07:21

of my arms, as you can see out

1:07:23

in these, these cats right now, and it

1:07:25

is sort of with my mime, moving your

1:07:27

hands back and forth is very important. And

1:07:30

so I, I've been preparing a lot

1:07:32

mentally, uh, in order to do such

1:07:34

things. So do you have to do

1:07:36

it physically though? I mean, that's, you know,

1:07:38

it's hard. Look,

1:07:41

you know, people aren't going to be looking at

1:07:43

your accent. Well, it's hard and you

1:07:45

know, he or she can't do it. Well,

1:07:47

so I've come to push you back around. I've hired,

1:07:49

What'd you say? It

1:07:52

can be a busy record. A work around. No, I

1:07:54

think I'm French. Oh, wow. God

1:07:57

see me. Sorry. You've taken the channel once.

1:08:00

I thought you said something about wet ground

1:08:02

and I started to get excited. So

1:08:06

I held an assistant and

1:08:08

I had an assistant. I

1:08:11

had an assistant and I had

1:08:13

an assistant. And I'm one

1:08:16

of those people who I

1:08:18

sort of, so what I do is I sit in a

1:08:20

chair in the corner, a tall chair, so I can see

1:08:22

everything that's happening on stage. It's sort of like Dave

1:08:24

Grohl or Axl Rose when they broke their legs.

1:08:28

Sure. And they would just sit

1:08:30

in a chair the entire performance. Do they make some kind of

1:08:32

pack? So yes. They have to use the same chair. It

1:08:34

is so nice to know that there's a performance of doing this

1:08:36

because for me it is the same, right? I

1:08:39

sit there and I hire somebody, his name is

1:08:41

David, and I go, we are

1:08:43

creating a box, and then David was sort of

1:08:45

with his hands, make a little box. So

1:08:47

that's sort of like a part of the

1:08:50

performance. And then I say, oh, oh, we

1:08:52

are, we are knock knocking and going in

1:08:54

the door. And it's a

1:08:56

two bedroom apartment and it's for sale. So

1:08:58

it's clean, but it's not normally this clean.

1:09:00

And David is sort of to the actions,

1:09:03

you know? Okay. Yeah. I

1:09:06

mean, yeah, it's good to have an assistant if you can't physically

1:09:08

do the work. Wait. I got a little bit lost.

1:09:10

Was everything you said happens on stage? Oh, yeah.

1:09:13

Okay. So it's got earlier you

1:09:15

asked me why I got into mine and really didn't. I'm

1:09:17

just so shy. I

1:09:20

would not have thought that about you. You're so gregarious.

1:09:22

I come in your room and everybody goes, oh,

1:09:24

that's a very quiet little person. And

1:09:26

so I just sort of said, okay,

1:09:28

well, good. I'm shy. I'm quiet. What

1:09:31

can I do? And so I said, okay, I look up. Jobs

1:09:33

for shy, quiet, little place. You have

1:09:35

not stopped talking since you got here. One

1:09:39

thing is, this is a stage show. I'll be very

1:09:41

quiet, very good at my job. And this is an

1:09:43

audio medium. So I mean, people do know what's happening.

1:09:46

So when people see you on

1:09:48

stage, aside from the fact that you're telling

1:09:50

everyone every single thing that you're doing, you're

1:09:52

very quiet. We're not telling David every single thing that we're

1:09:54

doing that way. He knows what to do. But he is

1:09:56

so quiet. He is

1:09:59

very quiet. All right.

1:10:01

Well, this sounds great. Where can people see this show? At

1:10:04

midnight at the

1:10:06

Midnight Slut. The Midnight Slut?

1:10:08

Do you know the pizza? Could

1:10:12

some of these sluts make it a little earlier?

1:10:14

I go to bed around 10. It's

1:10:17

so hard because at the day, if it's really

1:10:19

who you know. I don't know what you just

1:10:22

said. It's so hard because at the end of the day,

1:10:24

it's who you know. It's who you know. And for

1:10:26

me, it is who do I know. Now I know you.

1:10:28

So that might be nice. Maybe you could give me an

1:10:31

earlier slut at the JFL and thank you there. Give him

1:10:33

a slut. I'll

1:10:35

try to give you a slut earlier at the

1:10:37

JFL. Oh, thank you. Yes, Edgar.

1:10:41

You have to learn a second language, Scott. I do. I

1:10:43

need to learn bad French, I guess. Look

1:10:45

who you're American and say you.

1:10:49

I don't know what that was either. But look, we're running out

1:10:51

of time here on your segment. I'm so sorry. Mine?

1:10:54

Yes, you are. Can you believe it? Did

1:10:58

you think there was more? This

1:11:01

is about as long as seconds run on this show. I

1:11:03

can make it so quiet and so shy and I'm

1:11:06

just opening up to you and you're like, okay, time

1:11:08

to go. No, I'm sorry. That's the

1:11:10

way things go on these shows. We need, you know, okay.

1:11:13

Yeah, we don't have unlimited time, unfortunately.

1:11:15

There's a little. Number one, one. Oh,

1:11:19

quiet the mind. Very

1:11:24

thick. It's so funny. Yes. They

1:11:26

have a new show on Dropout

1:11:29

TV called

1:11:31

Very Important People where Vic hosts

1:11:33

and interviews improvisers

1:11:35

who have been put into elaborate

1:11:37

makeup that they then have

1:11:39

revealed to first themselves. So they don't know what they

1:11:42

don't know what they're going to be. Yes. And

1:11:44

then it is revealed to Vic. Oh, that's and

1:11:47

then they have an improvised interview. It's really funny.

1:11:49

I think Vic is in a Hallmark movie as

1:11:51

well. Yeah, Hanukkah movie on Hanukkah movie Hallmark Hanukkah

1:11:53

movie. Yeah. Okay. I got to see that. Later

1:11:55

on in that episode, by the way, if you hear

1:11:58

the whole thing, we have Mad Apodaca. from

1:12:01

Downey, California. He comes on his

1:12:04

henchmen, Marcus Green. Wait,

1:12:07

is Matt himself from Downey, California? Yes.

1:12:09

Okay. Yes. Anytime I pass the Downey

1:12:12

sign on the which

1:12:14

freeway I would, it must be the

1:12:16

five. Yeah, it's the five. What is

1:12:18

it, the California sign? I always

1:12:20

take a picture of it and text him. That's very sweet. In

1:12:24

his hometown. That's very sweet. So that's

1:12:26

a very funny episode. Listen to the entirety

1:12:28

of that. All right, we're going to take

1:12:30

a break. Yeah. Boy, this is exciting, Paul.

1:12:32

If we come back, we're

1:12:34

going to crack the top ten. Oh my God. If

1:12:36

we come back and we crack the top ten, can

1:12:38

you imagine? Can you imagine that happening? Maybe we'll come

1:12:40

back then. Maybe. Who knows? Who knows?

1:12:43

Listen to these ads and then see if we do. And don't

1:12:45

look at the time with how much time is left. Cheaters

1:12:48

never prosper. It's like, oh my God, when people kind of do

1:12:50

that. They always do.

1:12:52

When people, when people, but they, sometimes they

1:12:55

get caught, but first they prosper. Oh, hell

1:12:57

yeah. When people put like an Instagram

1:12:59

thing, like last photo of your pet, no cheating. I know

1:13:02

so many people are cheating. So many people

1:13:04

are cheating. Oh, I hate cheaters. I hate

1:13:06

cheaters so much. The show Cheaters. I

1:13:09

love cheaters. Joy Greco. Maybe you'll tell that story

1:13:11

when we come back. I think so. I

1:13:14

think that's locked in as one that people have heard too

1:13:16

much. We'll

1:13:20

be right back with. Bye, baby. We might be

1:13:22

back with your top ten

1:13:24

after this. All

1:13:28

right. Comedy

1:13:30

Bang Bang. We are back.

1:13:32

Cheaters. Cheaters. Hi. Welcome

1:13:34

to Cheaters. We here at Cheaters

1:13:37

are undergoing a transition period. We

1:13:40

know you trust us. That's

1:13:43

not lost on us. We here at Cheaters

1:13:45

respect you and your wishes. Paul,

1:13:50

we're here and we've

1:13:53

come to that moment in the countdown. This is

1:13:55

a real turning point where we crack the top

1:13:57

ten. Now You would originally say...

1:14:00

What if this were just ten episodes? Not enough,

1:14:02

I say. I think people are

1:14:04

travelling during the holidays. They had long car

1:14:06

trips. They have long plane trips. They count

1:14:08

on these Best if one thing your nails

1:14:10

this. Like that Guinness Book

1:14:13

of Person says passage a swift couple

1:14:15

days ago that I texted me i

1:14:17

surf out which is is hook approach

1:14:19

vector since the crabs and it has

1:14:21

been an absolute the less I just

1:14:23

heard says you know I I I

1:14:25

got see the world's tallest man and

1:14:27

the world's shortest men walking together which

1:14:30

was grapes arm but also they've added

1:14:32

a new level to it where these

1:14:34

babe said goodbye to what is records

1:14:36

family who was a woman who had

1:14:38

one point held the record for Laura

1:14:40

world's longest fingernails. The video. Is. Discuss.

1:14:43

It's horrible. Horrible. I

1:14:45

mean she passed away as she passed away

1:14:47

and will talk about why you're following that

1:14:50

a little later. I would love if they

1:14:52

did is they would put out in in

1:14:54

memoriam every year. The yeah although record holders

1:14:56

who passed away. I.

1:15:00

Wonder if they do records for like most

1:15:02

Oscars one and some with and. The.

1:15:04

Song that accompanies it. Yeah.

1:15:07

Also. Rock and Roll because sources treated

1:15:09

as already I spit it out. Athletes:

1:15:12

As authors now because I was like as

1:15:14

a little do up eat for and Immemorial

1:15:17

montage may but but of lyrics lyrics to

1:15:19

well well you have ya da da da

1:15:21

da da da da biggest slowed down like

1:15:23

not to a new arrangement but just slow

1:15:25

The tragedy. Drives. Through

1:15:27

through Oh Records, I think

1:15:29

it would be so popular

1:15:31

that other award shows would

1:15:33

start using that song. As

1:15:36

there is more as probably because there's nothing

1:15:39

new in Hollywood Hogan or Who of the

1:15:41

Roses on Let's Do It Paul, let's break

1:15:43

the top was and we came back from

1:15:46

the commercial. We may as well, right? We

1:15:48

said we were going to do it. Yeah,

1:15:50

if we came back, we said we were.

1:15:52

So let's do it. This is your choice

1:15:55

for episode number Ten. Okay,

1:15:58

Episode Ten. That isn't gonna be

1:16:00

a good one. I would have

1:16:02

been made the top ten. I would assume

1:16:05

it's good, but I don't know. It's gotta

1:16:07

be good luck. Bus. Nothing

1:16:09

against a you know, eleven through sixteen

1:16:12

tried. They're fine. Top.

1:16:15

Ten last when had had some thin right? That's

1:16:17

where it's at. is as good as you can

1:16:19

get your top five? yeah. Exactly.

1:16:22

Like who cares about top eight? Top

1:16:24

nine was his my space. Top

1:16:27

Eight Top Eight Remember Weird saying.

1:16:30

Where. You are Yeah, you are just like declaring

1:16:32

like you people are. The people are like the

1:16:34

books and is strange as anybody was Pop it

1:16:36

was like who's new? Top eight? Who's in Utah?

1:16:38

Man, why mine are your top eight. Really?

1:16:42

Interesting. With in your typing. I.

1:16:44

Don't know, I just. Because.

1:16:46

When when was that even around I I haven't

1:16:48

had a pays like that and so long know

1:16:51

and even tell you I can't remember like my

1:16:53

space is a blurred to me and I and

1:16:55

I did not. Did not really ever get the

1:16:57

Facebook saying I I know there's an official page

1:17:00

but I'd I'd so I just it's been decades

1:17:02

since that has. Been

1:17:04

anything ice paid any attention

1:17:07

to the kids decades on.

1:17:10

This. Episode Ten: The Episode Eight

1:17:12

Hundred And Seventy Eight Hundred

1:17:14

Seventeen From June Eighteenth Of

1:17:16

Twenty Twenty Three. Smack.

1:17:19

Dab in the dolls. May

1:17:21

or may not doubt that

1:17:23

do do do do with

1:17:26

Ah This is an episode

1:17:28

called Nostalgia Bombs. Nostalgia.

1:17:30

Bombs So Violent. Yeah,

1:17:33

especially the nostalgia part.

1:17:38

of this is an episode of that

1:17:40

has our good friend nick kroll another

1:17:42

person that has been doing the so

1:17:45

ever since the lead roles rick ross

1:17:47

did you get the role suffix picnic

1:17:49

or hope that's a myth if you're

1:17:51

listening and i certainly hope you are

1:17:53

you gotta start singing never going to

1:17:55

give you a gas or that people

1:17:57

can nick role you make pleases make

1:17:59

us It doesn't have to be long. Make

1:18:01

a brief video of you singing the chorus. Rick

1:18:03

Astley isn't gonna be around forever, man. No, man.

1:18:06

And we're gonna be looking- We're not gonna kill

1:18:08

him. We're gonna be looking for people to sub

1:18:10

in. Yes. You're the closest

1:18:12

we have. Yes, you're our only hope,

1:18:14

Nick Kroll. So

1:18:17

Nick Kroll- Can you

1:18:19

imagine if you're a

1:18:21

fucking old dude and you're

1:18:23

retired and then some little

1:18:25

robot shows a new- Dude, it's like

1:18:27

you're our only hope? Dude, it's like

1:18:29

I go to the theater for movies.

1:18:32

I don't need a droid coming over

1:18:34

to my house. Sorry, little dude. Why

1:18:36

don't you try that shit at Philadelphia? They

1:18:38

tear robots apart there. Is

1:18:41

that like the video at McDonald's?

1:18:44

The Philadelphia one I just saw? It

1:18:46

goes around every year from what I was reading, but it's

1:18:48

about- okay, let me explain a

1:18:50

little bit of this. Okay. So ostensibly

1:18:52

the video is a guy going up

1:18:54

to the counter at a McDonald's and

1:18:57

saying, putting

1:18:59

the cashier on blast or as he's

1:19:01

saying, I'm gonna check you because

1:19:03

you wrote down your phone number for

1:19:06

my boyfriend. And

1:19:09

I need to check you for this. And

1:19:14

she kind of opens her eyes

1:19:16

wide like this guy is being confrontational to

1:19:19

me. And then the other women who

1:19:21

are working there all band together and gang

1:19:24

up on him and are like,

1:19:26

you're not checking anything. This

1:19:28

is Philadelphia. He's like, whoa, damn, I

1:19:31

thought I was in the suburbs. They're

1:19:33

like, no, this is Philadelphia. And

1:19:37

so that's the one thing. It's very nice to see

1:19:39

a video where all the women basically

1:19:42

beat a guy who's intimidating down. I

1:19:45

find out the story behind the video is the

1:19:47

guy creating it is a prankster who

1:19:50

is not-

1:19:54

okay, this is the weird part of it. Is

1:19:57

not gay, but plays this

1:19:59

gay character. character, and admits, yes,

1:20:01

he used to have a problem with gay people.

1:20:03

Oh my god. That's all behind me

1:20:06

now. And now he-

1:20:08

In fact, I'm celebrating them by doing

1:20:10

this character. Yes, now after playing this

1:20:12

character, he realizes that everyone's just a

1:20:14

human being. It's just like- Are you

1:20:16

fucking kidding me? I'm not. Oh my

1:20:19

god. And so his idea of a

1:20:21

prank is to go up and get

1:20:23

in someone's face who's just trying to

1:20:25

like work at their job

1:20:28

with this fake bullshit, but

1:20:30

it's being touted as like, oh, it's a feel-good video

1:20:32

because the women all band together, but I

1:20:35

think the guy making it should be tried

1:20:37

at the hay. Yeah, agree. What

1:20:39

I was referring- And found guilty. What I was referring

1:20:42

to was there was a sort of like, I forget

1:20:44

what it was called, but the idea was that this

1:20:46

robot was going to

1:20:48

travel across the country, and

1:20:51

it was like a goodwill kind of thing. And

1:20:54

so it went to several places without incident, came

1:20:56

to Philadelphia, and then it was torn apart. Which

1:21:02

is, it bumps me out, but also really

1:21:04

makes me laugh. And

1:21:07

by the way, we've talked about this with

1:21:09

Tawny, I believe. Tawny

1:21:11

Newsom. If you ever see one

1:21:13

of those delivery robots, kick it over. Why?

1:21:17

Because it's taking someone's job. We

1:21:19

looked into, we were kind of joking about

1:21:22

it, like, should we be kicking this over?

1:21:24

And then I believe we sent some news

1:21:27

articles back and forth where we realized, yes, we should

1:21:29

be kicking these over. But what about the people who

1:21:31

don't get their order? Who cares? Go

1:21:34

to, hey Ebenezer Scrooge,

1:21:36

don't yell down at the boy to go fucking

1:21:39

buy you a turkey. Go to the market yourself. Yeah, so

1:21:41

what if your legs don't work? Scrooge's

1:21:44

legs did work though, right? That's

1:21:46

not in the story. You know what? They

1:21:48

never mentioned his legs at all. Bro,

1:21:52

we know Scrooge didn't have legs. This

1:21:54

whole story might be ableist. That's

1:21:56

why Patrick Stewart did

1:21:59

it kneeling down. Oh wow, Oh wait.

1:22:01

I thought he did it because he wanted

1:22:03

to honor doors. While.

1:22:06

Was it was a two pronged. A

1:22:08

C. E were initially was going to

1:22:10

kneel on some shoes and they said so through.

1:22:12

let's take the sues out of it was six

1:22:14

years out of a just so we're Covered Kiss

1:22:17

from the Doesn't Have Low know my shoes or

1:22:19

gold. Ah, salt

1:22:21

and pepper. Who.

1:22:24

Has stolen my shoes, That's.

1:22:26

What I was doing is by

1:22:28

the way was Patrick Stewart on

1:22:30

Snl introducing some power yes of

1:22:32

so says he had a pep

1:22:34

Ah. I'm okay. So

1:22:37

Nick Kroll is on this episode. I you

1:22:39

know him from oh how low Ah ends

1:22:41

a Big Mouth is the thing he's currently

1:22:43

doing as his standup comedians. Well, he's been

1:22:46

a good friend. Comedy Bang Bang over the

1:22:48

years, as in the early episodes used to

1:22:50

do characters. We talk about that a little

1:22:53

bit in the clip. you're gonna hear it's

1:22:55

ah, Stand on. That now ah well

1:22:57

we talk about in the clip

1:22:59

of maybe he doesn't have a

1:23:02

Ah and I, he's talking about

1:23:04

the New Season, A Big Mouth,

1:23:06

or that the spinoff Human Resources.

1:23:09

And. Ah, Savannah Voiceless.

1:23:12

Know. Interestingly enough that comes up

1:23:14

every time is on the show,

1:23:16

either on and then in between

1:23:19

clips. John gambling very funny improviser

1:23:21

comes on and played in Alien

1:23:23

Corbacho. you'll hear a little bit

1:23:25

of him in the next clip.

1:23:27

Ah, We're going to skip to

1:23:29

Gills Airy. This is his first

1:23:31

appearance on the Countdown as Jarkko

1:23:33

Lamentable. Ah, who is a Yeah?

1:23:36

Well, you'll hear it. It's why

1:23:38

we have the title Nostalgia Bombs.

1:23:40

This is your episode number ten.

1:23:44

You know I'm from Big Mouth is that

1:23:46

the Coke reader? And please welcome back to

1:23:48

the showed Nick Kroll! Hay que ela. Oh

1:23:51

I'm so excited to be

1:23:54

are thrilled to talk about

1:23:56

to swear that insurrections. Went wrong

1:23:58

when they went right. And

1:24:00

just jump in. How are you doing? Ah

1:24:02

eight, don't swings back around on me. I'm

1:24:05

the interviewer. your the interviewees. you know me

1:24:07

he says you know my track your to

1:24:09

uncomfortable in this hot seat. not say that

1:24:11

much. I've drank all

1:24:13

my to hundred eyes' t as right you have

1:24:16

a big glass of that to do you dare

1:24:18

drink more two and a break. I were I

1:24:20

would dare drink more but there's none left. others

1:24:22

you at all of it. I target all a

1:24:24

drag the last couple of test on a ice

1:24:27

unsweetened t I believe it's taste have. A

1:24:30

honor His a term for a

1:24:33

type of music Yes, that your

1:24:35

old character, El Chupacabra wouldn't I

1:24:37

target the hot seat. The

1:24:41

i can you do him any. More. Can you do

1:24:43

for breezes? Do as. I

1:24:46

can do it. don't do any. The

1:24:48

head assess assess thought about a service.

1:24:50

it's I'd still on the table. sigma

1:24:52

say it's l years with some reason

1:24:55

still fire justice to go. Okay saw

1:24:57

him an email or daurio of human

1:24:59

of course mail demon I think if

1:25:01

I made el Chupacabra from Spain. Making.

1:25:04

Do It. Puts the let's

1:25:06

Do it was such as

1:25:08

let's reboot him as the

1:25:10

Spaniard years ago to was

1:25:13

have it boasts a business

1:25:15

aside from Spain Spaniel. I'm

1:25:17

his promise manga and therefore

1:25:19

it's fine. it's fine. I

1:25:23

have no idea what to pack nowadays

1:25:25

and of them, goats and. See,

1:25:28

it's just all got ya that are

1:25:30

all of its magic idea is you

1:25:32

think it's fine because it's Europeans that

1:25:34

would say I my feeling is that

1:25:36

Northern European not even I get Spain

1:25:38

any anything west of let's say know

1:25:40

all of Europe is on the table.

1:25:42

Still okay for a white American mayhem

1:25:44

and but who are Human resources is

1:25:46

that it's the spin off of Big

1:25:48

Mouth, Big Mouth and Courses the Seminal.

1:25:51

So it's been out there for now.

1:25:53

Twenty five season and we're gonna do

1:25:55

where we were just started writing are

1:25:57

eighth when. the strike started ah has it

1:25:59

real been on for eight seasons? With seven seasons.

1:26:01

We've done seven seasons of Big Mouth. That's incredible.

1:26:03

I have no idea it was that many. It'll

1:26:06

be by the time. It feels like just time

1:26:08

has. It means like feels like time is just

1:26:10

evaporated. We're all just. It really is. Quickly dying.

1:26:14

Not quick enough for some of the. Yeah.

1:26:16

And so a bunch of the basic basically

1:26:18

the if you haven't seen it the on

1:26:20

Big Mouth they have these characters that are

1:26:23

you know we are like all the hormone

1:26:25

monsters and shame wizards and depression

1:26:28

kitties and Tito the anxiety

1:26:30

mosquito and love bugs

1:26:32

and hate worms and all these characters that sounds

1:26:34

like you're making things up right now. Well I

1:26:36

mean that you make up. Let's just say that's

1:26:38

what writing is right. At some point we all

1:26:40

made them up. It didn't exist and that's why

1:26:43

I excuse me. Hold on. That's why I

1:26:45

doesn't. I'm trying to get him away from

1:26:47

the mic but he is wrestling back. No

1:26:49

excuse me. I'm getting back to the mic.

1:26:51

I got something to say about how fucking

1:26:54

cool a.i. is. Now

1:26:56

I get it and I understand. Wouldn't it be

1:26:58

cool though if like it's so hard to write

1:27:00

a show. Just let the A.I. do it. I

1:27:02

know. Well I don't. I mean I did. I

1:27:04

was someone show me like

1:27:07

writing sucks. Writing sucks. It's so boring.

1:27:09

Let's say I asshole. So boring. People

1:27:11

don't realize how boring it is to

1:27:13

sit in a room all day and

1:27:16

fight yourself for meeting snacks. What a

1:27:18

fucking nightmare. Structure and then tagging Joe.

1:27:20

And then having it come out and

1:27:22

being like and what season and who

1:27:24

and what was the show. That's

1:27:27

my impression of you. I

1:27:30

don't know these things. Yeah. What

1:27:32

am I supposed to crack. What was it

1:27:35

to host the show. I have

1:27:37

a bare minimum. It was

1:27:40

already a Herculean feat getting you in the

1:27:42

chair. God damn right. Go watch

1:27:44

your show as well. Absolutely. Look I and

1:27:46

that's and that's what the show's about. But

1:27:49

it is just all these. How many episodes of comedy bang bang

1:27:51

did I do. How many have I done.

1:27:54

No how many did I do. You've done about

1:27:56

a thousand episode. Not of this of the TV

1:27:58

show. You did. Let's say

1:28:00

I might get seasons. How many of I

1:28:02

think you did about four seasons, like 10

1:28:04

episodes. I think you did about 40 to

1:28:07

50. You are so wrong. Five

1:28:10

seasons, 110. See, we don't have to know

1:28:12

these things about each other. I

1:28:14

need to know how many four night events do that.

1:28:20

All right. Anyway, we need to get to our next guest.

1:28:22

He's a nostalgia guide. First time

1:28:24

on the show. Please welcome Yargo Lamento.

1:28:26

Hello, Scott. Hi, Yargo. So nice to

1:28:28

meet you. Hi, Nick. Hi,

1:28:31

Karmato. Hi, Yargo. Nice to meet you. Hi.

1:28:35

Where are you from? Yargo. I'm

1:28:37

from Michigan. Oh, okay. Traverse City.

1:28:40

Traverse City? You know, they have a film festival

1:28:42

there. They have a film festival. Cherry Capital of

1:28:45

the World. Cherry Capital of the World. Michael

1:28:47

Moore. Michael Moore does his stuff there. What

1:28:51

makes it the Cherry Capital of the World? They grow a lot

1:28:53

or they eat a lot? They just eat bullshit. They just, they

1:28:55

just go to the cherries. Yeah. Wow. I like

1:28:58

to put them in a soda every once in a while. Yes.

1:29:00

Really? You do? Yeah, sure. Why not? If you

1:29:03

have a little Maraschino cherry there. Oh, man. I

1:29:05

haven't had a Maraschino cherry. Oh,

1:29:07

do you remember Maraschino cherry? Oh, wow. It's nice to meet

1:29:09

you, by the way. Yeah, nice to meet you. But

1:29:11

are you nostalgic for Maraschino? You already remember

1:29:13

me, don't you? Yeah. I'm familiar.

1:29:18

From like a minute ago. When I'm a

1:29:20

nostalgia guide, I'm what's called a backache.

1:29:23

A backache? Is that a backache

1:29:25

or reverse? Backside kick. Basically, I

1:29:27

look back at things that everyone

1:29:30

already knows about. Oh, okay. Describe

1:29:32

the process here. Well, I'm able

1:29:34

to channel distinct memories. Oh.

1:29:37

Childhood memories, adolescent memories from each of

1:29:39

you, from all of us that we've

1:29:41

shared. You're able to draw these out

1:29:44

from us? They're called nostalgia visions. Oh.

1:29:46

Or nostalgia readings. And...

1:29:49

Could we do a nostalgia reading right now? Well,

1:29:51

I have to warn you, Scott. Okay. Nostalgia

1:29:54

is very powerful. It's very

1:29:56

scary, Scott. Is that the... Oh, I'm sorry.

1:29:58

It's scary to remember things. I thought there

1:30:00

might be more warning. I didn't recall that bad.

1:30:02

It's that empty feeling when you can't go home

1:30:06

The year is 1996. Okay You're

1:30:09

at your favorite candy store. I'm 26

1:30:11

years. Anyone remember Gushers Sure,

1:30:14

not really. But yeah, what about

1:30:16

her goobles? The

1:30:19

yogurt candy anyone sure I know those they

1:30:21

had chocolate on the outside no yogurt

1:30:24

Mooch the pear on the inside They

1:30:27

were so mealy and remember the tagline No,

1:30:31

if you don't if you don't

1:30:33

spit them out they ain't goo-goo man

1:30:36

That was the tagline Googoo

1:30:39

balls hard

1:30:41

cutoff on that Can

1:30:46

I just say you had me a yogurt

1:30:49

Yeah, yogurt pretzels. What were they googoo

1:30:52

ball? You're just you know, you're thinking of yogurt pretzels

1:30:55

It's a yogurt candy. Yeah, I don't I

1:30:57

mean, I don't really remember it by no

1:30:59

go good Yeah, go gert.

1:31:01

That's children need go gert I

1:31:04

don't remember it. I don't maybe you're tapping into your

1:31:06

own ball of ours all about you remember Pizza Hut

1:31:09

Yeah, sure making it great. Nobody

1:31:11

I'll close your eyes. Okay, 1987

1:31:16

Close your eyes. They're comes. I need you

1:31:18

to concentrate to take you back Scott

1:31:21

17 it's the Pizza Hut that looks like

1:31:23

a tavern everyone remember that. Yeah. Well, you're

1:31:25

eating at home You're

1:31:29

not in a Pizza Hut at all your

1:31:31

mother made her famous recipe for counter

1:31:33

steak You know that steak

1:31:35

that sits on the counter to rot for hours

1:31:39

You know what I'm talking about. No, it's cold brown. Yeah. Yeah

1:31:42

Yes, your father and mother eat

1:31:44

very quickly to go upstairs and have sex leaving

1:31:46

you alone at the table But

1:31:48

your brother today you

1:31:51

sit wondering if your big brother is going

1:31:53

to fuck you Yeah,

1:31:58

I just broke the connection Thank thank

1:32:00

good I

1:32:05

Look I remember pizza. Wow. That was just

1:32:07

so sad and creepy, isn't it? Yeah I

1:32:09

don't remember the counter steak any of that

1:32:12

is that is that you you guys I

1:32:14

had he had me to Countersteak because I

1:32:16

my family's to leave pieces. They got a

1:32:18

lot The

1:32:20

counter we're in this on the same page.

1:32:22

Yeah, they're that's right. I mean daddy they

1:32:25

go upstairs and fuck Yeah,

1:32:27

I got a bit peckish at

1:32:29

the idea of his brother fucking

1:32:31

him. Yeah, I know your eyes

1:32:35

Yeah, you suddenly you had the dollar signs

1:32:37

on you Holographed on

1:32:39

your eyeball exactly. Yes for

1:32:41

some reason. I don't know that I

1:32:43

relate to any of that beyond Oh All

1:32:48

right, okay It's 1998.

1:32:50

All right. You walk

1:32:52

into a game shop in your

1:32:54

boot cut jeans and platforms to

1:32:56

see Zelda's ocarina of time on the shelf

1:33:00

You put it down feel its

1:33:02

matte finish and then

1:33:04

start to suck on the video game

1:33:06

box on the corner Right

1:33:10

there in the store and you do it you take the

1:33:12

corner and suck on it before you know It you're jerking

1:33:14

your little dick off with your feet in front of all

1:33:16

the nerds. That's a sore Okay

1:33:23

Okay, you're go you

1:33:25

know you had me What

1:33:29

was that that's a nostalgia bomb Sometimes

1:33:32

I have these nostalgia

1:33:34

bombs that come up with to

1:33:37

them body work You

1:33:41

remember that in bodywork Anyway Anyway

1:33:50

Yeah, I remember those things and those are what do

1:33:53

you call them? You remember that Arizona's he's owned by

1:33:55

the same guy who made crazy horse 40s.

1:33:57

Oh really and they love the bottles

1:34:00

looked similar in design. But

1:34:30

by the time you save enough money for her, she's

1:34:33

already dead. This

1:35:00

is for you. It's

1:35:02

a German 19-30. Different

1:35:08

spot. I

1:35:12

was looking at her. What?

1:35:32

Flavor-blasted goldfish. Flavor-blasted

1:35:36

goldfish. Would you like

1:35:39

to play a little game, Scott? I... yes. This

1:35:41

is called Remember This. Okay.

1:35:44

It sounds very similar to what we've already been doing. Ready?

1:35:46

Yeah. Hold on. Wait,

1:35:49

you asked if I was ready, but you... I

1:35:51

never this. What's

1:35:53

this? I never this. I remember

1:35:55

this. Veggie lasagna. It's

1:35:58

not like a product. that has

1:36:00

ever gone away. I

1:36:03

never this. This is. Greek

1:36:05

woes. Still around. I

1:36:08

never this. Smoking section. Oh sure. I'm

1:36:11

nostalgic for that. I never this. The

1:36:14

lunar landing. I never

1:36:16

this. This is. I

1:36:19

never this. To get this game.

1:36:22

I never this. Interrupting. Oh here's a

1:36:24

good one. Here's

1:36:28

a great one. Here's a great one. Here's

1:36:31

a great nostalgia. Tommy Davidson.

1:36:34

What? Tommy Davidson. Tommy

1:36:36

Davidson. Why you

1:36:38

were just mouthing along with him. Tommy Davidson. Okay.

1:36:41

You were mouthing along. I

1:36:43

love mouthing along. That's my

1:36:45

thing. In living color. He's great.

1:36:48

Hey remember the song

1:36:50

Hey Soul Sister? Yeah. Not

1:36:52

from not too long ago. Hey. This

1:36:55

is. Train, right? Train.

1:36:57

Was it? Hey Soul Sister? Would

1:37:01

you like to hear a memory run? Yeah. Yeah.

1:37:04

Yeah. Okay here we

1:37:07

go. Dvds. Hard playdough. Scooby

1:37:09

doo undies with stains. Kids cuisines with the whole pig inside.

1:37:11

Krog and Toad go to the Gulf war. Shoot salinas. Pancho

1:37:13

vikumit suicide. I'm not a man. I'm

1:37:15

a man. I'm a man. I'm a man.

1:37:18

I'm a man. I'm a man. I'm a

1:37:20

man. I'm a man. I'm a

1:37:22

man. I'm a man. I'm

1:37:24

a man. I'm a man. Jamba

1:37:27

Juice. Jamba,

1:37:30

Jamba and Jovi Juice. That

1:37:34

clear little soap bottle with the orange

1:37:37

fish in front of it. You know

1:37:39

the little aquarium scene? The

1:37:44

Grinch outfit reeking after. After

1:37:46

Jim Carrey takes it off. From all the sweat. Shred

1:37:49

Greaser. With the green peanut

1:37:51

butter inside. The

1:37:54

50th anniversary of Pop-Tart. Egg

1:37:56

flavored. Natalie and Brivly

1:37:58

I had. a water birth

1:38:00

at the Super Bowl halftime show. That's it

1:38:03

for that one. Uh,

1:38:07

Yargo, do you have one last

1:38:09

one? Is that a tee-peeing of something? Do

1:38:12

I have one last one? I do

1:38:14

not. Oh, hey, all right. Hey, fair

1:38:16

enough. I have to answer it. Number

1:38:18

10. Hey,

1:38:20

nostalgia bombs. B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-bats and

1:38:23

beyond. Gil,

1:38:26

uh, very fun. Just a crazy

1:38:28

person. Very

1:38:31

nice guy. At some point,

1:38:34

I would love to. I don't want to do it

1:38:36

now because I've heard it third hand and I will get all the

1:38:38

details wrong, but there's a very funny story about him

1:38:40

in the Happy Endings

1:38:43

writers room. Someday I would

1:38:45

love for like David Casper,

1:38:47

someone to tell, about what

1:38:50

he did with a spare closet. A

1:38:52

spare closet. Yes. All

1:38:56

right, let's take a break. When we come

1:38:58

back, we'll have, uh, we're gonna round out

1:39:01

if, sorry, if we come back. We've

1:39:03

already cracked the top 10, but we're going to

1:39:05

get to the final clip that we're

1:39:08

gonna play on this particular episode. That's

1:39:10

right. Our number nine will be after

1:39:12

the break if we come back. Yeah.

1:39:15

So make your peace with that.

1:39:18

Yeah, and your God. And

1:39:20

your God makes his peace with it too. That's right. Hopefully

1:39:23

all of that will happen while you listen to these

1:39:25

ads. Bye. Bye.

1:39:32

Welcome back. Comedy Bang Bang, best of 2023, part

1:39:34

two. You

1:39:36

made it. You made it. Gonna take you to part

1:39:38

two. One, two, take me to part

1:39:41

two. Um, some

1:39:44

good clips this year. Yeah,

1:39:46

and some bad ones. Sure. Some terrible ones.

1:39:50

Do you think there's more good ones than bad ones? That's what

1:39:52

really counts. I don't know. I can't

1:39:55

tell. It's hard to say. Because the top 16,

1:39:58

they get a lot of votes. Yeah. The

1:40:00

bottom 16 they don't get a lot of votes and

1:40:03

then those middle and it is just

1:40:06

the 32 episodes, right? What

1:40:10

if 16 16 16 would be 50

1:40:14

yeah or 44 is that right? Yeah,

1:40:18

but this show comes out every goddamn week. Yeah, so that's

1:40:20

about it. So it's probably like 16 great

1:40:22

ones 16 shitty ones 16

1:40:25

fine ones 16 fine and woody and good

1:40:27

But that's good for a show, isn't it?

1:40:29

Not bad. It's not bad. It would be

1:40:31

terrible if we had terrible clips

1:40:34

How many how many great episodes of mad

1:40:36

about you were there? One

1:40:39

I have no idea. I have no idea Honestly

1:40:41

like stuff stuff. I was looking at some of the

1:40:43

ones that didn't crack the top 16 and

1:40:45

there's a great prize Yeah, there's some great ones in there.

1:40:47

So this is a good year, but let blame the people

1:40:50

let's get to The

1:40:52

next episode this is your choice for

1:40:55

number nine All

1:40:57

right episode number nine This

1:41:00

one happens to her first Scott. I know you

1:41:02

have all the answers. Oh, oh, here we go

1:41:04

I'm gonna tell you the number first. Okay episode

1:41:06

788. Okay, I Like

1:41:10

how you look at me meaningfully when you say the episode

1:41:12

number as if I'm instantly going to say oh

1:41:14

boy Well, the

1:41:16

date may give you a little bit of a

1:41:18

clue. It's December 11th of 2023 That

1:41:23

was this month. No 20

1:41:26

sorry 2022 2022

1:41:29

this month last year. Yes. I

1:41:32

don't know well Oh,

1:41:35

is it the Christmas special? Of course the 2022

1:41:37

holiday spectacular That's

1:41:43

right So traditionally

1:41:45

on the show it was hard during

1:41:47

Covid but traditionally during I was

1:41:50

easy actually I Was

1:41:54

really you enjoyed it I

1:41:56

yeah, I miss it kind of COVID

1:42:00

nostalgia. Yeah. I

1:42:03

do have a little bit of COVID nostalgia. Hey, remember

1:42:05

COVID? I do have a little, because there was like,

1:42:07

you didn't have to go to work and stuff. Yeah.

1:42:10

It was cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The first

1:42:12

couple of weeks were so great. Yeah. Because

1:42:15

it was like a snow day for the entire world. Yeah,

1:42:17

it was cool. Yeah. You could drive anywhere

1:42:19

you wanted. That's cool. And just get there in 10 minutes. Yeah.

1:42:22

It was like once upon a time on Hollywood. Yeah. Oh, so

1:42:24

good. I miss it. Let's

1:42:26

bring it back. Probably is going back. We

1:42:28

talked about this before, that there should be like

1:42:31

a couple weeks quarantine. We should, you know,

1:42:33

other countries, they all take a month off

1:42:36

or whatever. Yeah. Let's take a COVID

1:42:38

month. Why not? Everyone pretends they have COVID.

1:42:40

I'm not saying we all get it, because I don't

1:42:42

want anyone to pass away or get sick. Yeah. Let's

1:42:45

all pretend we have it. Let's all agree. We're

1:42:47

going to pretend we all have COVID. Not that we're afraid of

1:42:49

getting it, but that we all have it. Yeah. And

1:42:52

no one can call anyone on it and say,

1:42:54

wait a minute, you do it. Because if one

1:42:56

person does the whole thing crumbles. It's held together

1:42:58

by a gossamer strand. Yes.

1:43:03

So this is the 22 holiday

1:43:06

spectacular. And traditionally these are big

1:43:08

episodes where I put out an

1:43:10

email to everyone's favorite

1:43:13

guests. And it

1:43:15

all depends on how many people respond.

1:43:17

And the longer we

1:43:19

do it, the more people respond. It used to

1:43:21

be, I would say, hey, can you do it

1:43:23

on this day? And maybe five people would say,

1:43:25

yeah, I could do it. And that would be

1:43:28

it. But now these are just huge cluster fucks.

1:43:32

So many people were on it this year. Paul F.

1:43:35

Tompkins, you were on it. Sean

1:43:37

Disten was on it. John Gabris, Lily

1:43:39

Sullivan, Carl Tartt, Jessica McKenna, Will

1:43:41

Hines. Can I just give a shout out to

1:43:43

Lily Sullivan? Yeah,

1:43:48

you can. It's time. I really like her. It's

1:43:50

time. Yeah, I like her. Okay, we'll hear a little

1:43:53

bit from her. We also have Will Hines, Vic

1:43:55

Michaelis, Lisa Gilroy, and Gil Azeri, who we just

1:43:57

heard from. So this is what we're gonna do.

1:43:59

gonna hear these are like three hour long

1:44:02

episodes we're gonna hear a little sample of

1:44:04

this we're gonna hear

1:44:06

four clips you clip in the

1:44:08

floor did you call me forklips yeah

1:44:10

how dare you the first clip we're

1:44:12

gonna hear is Paul we're

1:44:18

gonna hear you as Obi Ron Kenobi explain

1:44:21

Obi Ron Kenobi well it's my most successful character

1:44:23

and he was

1:44:25

a guy I think I did it three

1:44:28

times I know you did it in

1:44:30

Atlanta yeah I did it once on the

1:44:32

show and I just didn't have anything but

1:44:34

the name that's all I had I really

1:44:36

didn't know what to do and

1:44:39

and then during that appearance

1:44:42

you were plugging the tour and I said that

1:44:44

I was gonna be on the tour with you

1:44:46

as I said as a way Ron Kenobi I'll

1:44:48

be there and so then I made good on

1:44:50

that promise I somehow by the

1:44:53

way keep accidentally on my notes keep hitting

1:44:56

delete all know the

1:44:59

the transcribing thing so it's been transcribing

1:45:01

what I'm frantically trying to erase it

1:45:03

that's been transcribing everything you've been saying

1:45:05

for the best well stop because I

1:45:07

don't like that well

1:45:09

I could just listen to the episode back and do it yeah

1:45:14

so and then I did it

1:45:16

a third time and I think that's it so

1:45:18

this would be the third time I think this is

1:45:20

the third and final appearance of Obi Ron the final

1:45:22

for good I enjoy it so

1:45:26

we're gonna hear Obi Ron Kenobi and

1:45:28

then we're gonna hear Sean Diston this

1:45:32

is his first appearance on the countdown

1:45:34

he is portraying McGruff the crime dog

1:45:39

and then in between clips I believe

1:45:41

John Gabers comes on his intern Geno you'll hear

1:45:44

a little bit of him in the

1:45:46

next clip which is Lily Sullivan as

1:45:48

Francesca Bolognese and

1:45:51

then the final clip you'll hear is

1:45:53

Karl Tarte as Charles Barkley and

1:45:55

that is also the final clip you're here you will

1:45:58

hear before you die yes this is the ring episode.

1:46:01

Yep. Sorry guys. What? A

1:46:04

week? Yeah. So

1:46:06

technically I guess you could listen to the next couple episodes of

1:46:08

The Best Stuff. Yeah, that's true. Absolutely,

1:46:11

yeah. The ring rules are seven days, right? That's ring

1:46:13

rules. All

1:46:15

right, so let's hear it. This is your choice for

1:46:17

episode number nine. Number nine.

1:46:20

I don't remember anything about him. Please welcome

1:46:22

back to the show Obie Ron Kenobi. Hey,

1:46:26

thanks for having me back, Scott. What

1:46:29

a weird introduction. I

1:46:31

know you have met a couple times. We have met

1:46:33

a couple times. I don't want to be that guy,

1:46:36

but we've met before. Atlanta, Georgia together, I believe. Were

1:46:38

we not? And also here. Where

1:46:40

the big runoff election just occurred. Okay.

1:46:45

And we were there and I don't recall

1:46:47

anything about you other than you don't know

1:46:49

anything. Well,

1:46:52

I wouldn't put it that way. I think

1:46:54

that's a bit reductive. I'm not really big

1:46:56

on pop culture. Right. I'm not

1:46:58

going to pop culture. Yeah. Are you

1:47:00

going to unpopular culture? Well, I mean, in a way

1:47:02

I like nature, which clearly is not very popular these

1:47:05

days with the way we're treating the earth. Oh,

1:47:07

so you're sort of an eco guy. I

1:47:09

mean, I care about it, but. Are

1:47:12

you doing anything about it? No.

1:47:14

Recycling anything? I recycle, I guess.

1:47:17

Like, what do you mean when you say I guess?

1:47:19

I mean, I'll put when the regular trash gets full,

1:47:21

then I start putting stuff in the recycling trash. Okay,

1:47:24

that's not. And you're putting the wrong

1:47:26

stuff. It's full though. Okay, that's a

1:47:28

good point. Tell us

1:47:30

again about you. Who are you? I'm

1:47:32

just a guy. My name is

1:47:34

Obi-ron Kenobi. I apparently, this is

1:47:36

a Star Wars thing, but

1:47:38

I was named after my mother. Right. Who's

1:47:41

your mother again? Well, if I

1:47:43

was named after, who do you think she

1:47:45

was? Ron or Obi-ron? Obi-ron. Oh,

1:47:47

okay. Her name was Obi-ron. Obi-ron. Interesting.

1:47:51

And her name is Kenobi as well? No, she's

1:47:53

a traditional lady. She

1:47:55

took my father's name. I see. Okay.

1:47:58

Her name is none of your business. I use it for... My

1:48:00

bank. Oh, you use

1:48:02

it for your bank? Yeah. In what

1:48:04

way? What way do

1:48:06

you think? You go to the bank

1:48:09

and you have it in a safety deposit box? Okay,

1:48:11

Ben. Let me tell you something. I

1:48:13

like you, okay? I don't know if that's true anymore.

1:48:15

I do like you and I want

1:48:17

to be friends with you because I think you're a

1:48:19

cool guy. I think you're a cool guy. And I