0:05

What's up, Fungal Associates? Welcome to

0:08

Completely Arbitrary, the podcast about trees

0:10

and other related topics. I

0:12

am one of your hosts. My name is

0:14

Alex Croson. I'm also a host, sorry. I'm

0:16

here. I'm Casey. Casey Clapp. Hi,

0:19

everyone. Hello, Casey. Well,

0:21

Alex, there's some propaganda out there I need to talk

0:24

about real fast. Oh my God. Some

0:26

people saying I like apples and I just want to

0:28

say demonstrably here. No. I saw the

0:30

propaganda that you're talking about. Yeah, yeah. Do

0:33

you want to explain what happened? Well, I'm dating

0:35

this woman. Her name's Carrie. And

0:37

she has been spreading

0:39

slander because

0:42

I have eaten

0:44

apples. Okay, I have. I do. I eat apples

0:46

because it comes in my CSA. I signed up

0:48

for the fruit thing and they come. There's

0:51

always an excuse. The person you're

0:53

dating. Yes. Posted

0:55

a Valentine's Day post, appreciation post.

0:57

It was such a delight. It

0:59

was very sweet. Yeah. But. And

1:03

it's it said here, this is Casey.

1:06

He likes to do this. And then you would swipe

1:08

to the next one. He likes to do this. It's

1:10

like adventure, you know. Yeah. And then there was a

1:12

third one and it was you eating an apple.

1:15

Caught in the act. And it even

1:17

said, and he likes apples. Yeah. She's

1:20

got a whole trove

1:22

of pictures dedicated specifically to

1:24

catching me in the act of eating apples. This

1:27

is blackmail. It is. It is. Yeah. But anyway, so you

1:29

just want to get out in front of it, you know,

1:31

don't drive blackmail me. I will see you

1:33

later. Anyway, I

1:36

just need to get that out. Happy Valentine's Day. Happy

1:38

Valentine's Day. Yes. Today is the

1:40

day after Valentine's Day. If you're hearing this, we

1:43

recorded this a week ago. Yeah. Today's the

1:45

day after the day

1:47

after Valentine's Day a week from now. Is

1:49

there like a convention for like Valentine's Day

1:51

boxing day? You know. Oh, interesting. Yeah. For all

1:54

the people who like pick the flowers. Do they

1:56

get a day off to get flowers? I love

1:58

that. That is when you can. go

2:00

and drink alone at the bar. Well, speaking

2:03

of going to the bar and drinking

2:05

alone, today, Casey, we are talking about

2:08

seasonal affective disorder. Oh, wow! And

2:11

we're talking about a tree, of

2:13

course. That's true. And that tree

2:15

is the witch hazel. Wait, which

2:17

one? Ha ha, Casey. Hmm. The

2:20

who's on first hazel. Oh man,

2:22

Alex, do I have so

2:25

much more of that to come. Oh boy. It's gonna be

2:27

great, you're gonna love it. Am I excited? But

2:29

before we talk about that, Casey, did

2:31

you know that our podcast is entirely

2:34

supported by our dear fungal associate listeners?

2:36

No, are we essentially like a public

2:40

radio situation? In

2:43

a way, yes. Really, tell me more.

2:45

Your tax dollars go to Completely Arbitrary.

2:47

And if you wanna be a supporter

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becoming a Tremium member at arbitrarypod.supercast.com. That

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s-u-p-e-r-c-a-s-t.com. Thank

3:13

you, Alex. On there, we have a

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4:03

We will be right back with the

4:05

witch hazel here on Completely Arbitrary. What's

4:10

up everybody, it's Alex, and I've got a question

4:12

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4:14

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4:16

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it out. Welcome

5:42

back to Completely Arbitrary. Today we are

5:44

talking the witch Hazel.

5:48

Casey, scientific name for the

5:50

one that we're talking about today? Yeah,

5:52

the one we are talking about

5:55

today is actually a hybrid between

5:57

the Japanese and Chinese witch Hazel.

6:00

Which is Hamamellus cross

6:02

Intermedia. Intermedia. Yes, exactly. Wow.

6:05

So, Intermedia, it means it's

6:07

an intermediate kind of thing

6:09

between the two different species.

6:12

Oh, sure. Yeah,

6:14

so it's got, it's a hybrid. The

6:16

two other, the normal species are Hamamellus

6:18

japonica and Hamamellus mulus.

6:21

Okay. Now, these are unique trees,

6:24

Alex, for the reasons we are

6:26

talking about today. Oh, fun. And

6:29

it's certainly that these are

6:31

very, very, very, very early

6:33

blooming species. Oh,

6:35

wow. Of, I'm

6:38

gonna say, tree. Now

6:43

we have a couple of, there's a couple

6:46

of emails being written to us today, a

6:48

couple different types because you get your choice.

6:51

Either we're not covering a tree. Yes. And

6:54

it's a hybrid. Exactly. So, has

6:56

completely arbitrary jumped the shark, Casey?

6:59

Oh, no, definitely not. No, no, no. No,

7:01

if anything, we have skidded under it really

7:03

cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're actually gonna

7:05

show you that the shark is, the shark

7:08

is, it's just a, you know, it doesn't

7:10

even exist. The shark is the gate in

7:12

Indiana Jones that he like slides under and

7:14

grabs his hat. Yeah, yeah, and grabs his

7:16

hat. Uh-huh. And then he's on to the

7:18

next section of the movie. That's right. That's

7:21

what we're about to do. Well, Casey, let's move on to that next

7:23

section. Let's imagine that you and I, I would

7:26

like to imagine that you and I are

7:28

walking through a

7:31

bit of a graveyard situation. Oh, that's

7:33

interesting that you'd say that. Yeah,

7:36

and we come across some witch hazel. It's

7:39

February and hey, they're blooming.

7:41

They're blooming. Casey, let's ID

7:43

this tree. So this is,

7:46

as you said, a tree? Yeah.

7:50

And the only reason that we can get there is

7:53

because it technically gets above

7:55

15 feet, You

7:59

know, so you can look at it. The yeah,

8:01

let's. Drink left for got sort of our

8:03

bars for injuries exactly. is it is the

8:05

least? Another arbitrary measure the we can just

8:07

look towards. By the way, enter you spelled.

8:10

E. N T R E's the other

8:12

bar for entry being a single stem,

8:14

exactly. And that's where this starts to

8:17

kind of like get a little a

8:19

little l squishy. Okay, I have always

8:21

known these trees as. Being a

8:23

single sam at the base, but

8:26

then almost immediately it splits. up

8:28

into multiple different larger limbs

8:30

come from. That one base or

8:33

is splits out and they kind of go

8:35

up and then out of her. but usually

8:37

it is only that. like that one single

8:39

base it's not like gave. A

8:42

normal hazel like a cordless ah

8:44

are native species. Here is the

8:47

Beat Hazelnut Ah. There's also a

8:49

native one over in Europe called

8:51

the Guess they just called the

8:53

Common Hazel There. And they

8:55

they are shrubs. the grow up and grow

8:58

out. We talked about the European species Corliss

9:00

of L Honor and they had multiple stems.

9:02

A cop like is they're they're they're big

9:04

look and things you can't quite say that.

9:07

The tree this. You are like

9:09

that looks like a tree. It's just kind of

9:11

looks like it doesn't really want to be a

9:13

tree. Our enemies yeah of telling

9:15

a rhododendron were like yeah they

9:17

can get big be country like

9:19

that for the most best. Their

9:21

single standard and splits into a

9:23

smaller filmed canopy thing. It's the

9:26

royalty. Who. Was born and

9:28

royalty and doesn't want that life in

9:30

wants to live among the people exactly.

9:32

Ah that's be a yeah. This is

9:34

a tree that wants to be from

9:36

now. Sell we are We're. Just going is

9:38

rounded up to tree right now because of

9:40

that. but because that one standard. because of

9:42

that site now whenever i see this tree

9:44

whenever see grow up and you can see

9:47

a bunch of pictures of them when they're

9:49

young they look like day and upside down

9:51

triangle balancing on the tip of the triangle

9:53

allow city look very easy shit as they

9:56

grow up and they grow out which is

9:58

important because actually used in water

10:00

dowsing. We'll talk about that later. Oh wow

10:02

fun. Yeah so as it grows up it

10:04

creates these V-shaped main

10:06

limbs and then it creates

10:09

this kind of like this spreading

10:11

low canopy. It's

10:13

very effective I think and in

10:16

summertime you'll see these nice big leaves. It's

10:18

alternately arranged. These leaves are maybe about

10:21

four inches long and what's

10:23

interesting is that they have veins that come

10:25

out and each one of those veins kind

10:27

of angles like a very sharp V

10:29

towards the tip of the leaf and

10:32

so near the base of the leaf there's

10:35

no vein that goes out and hits the

10:37

edge hits the margin of the leaf. So

10:40

for like the bottom third or the bottom

10:42

half of the leaf there is not really

10:44

there's like a vein that's just running parallel

10:46

with that side of the leaf. Does that

10:48

make sense? Interesting. It looks like

10:51

it was it's a leaf that was cut

10:53

out of another leaf. That's

10:55

such a great idea. That's perfect. It

10:57

was like whoa whoa whoa whoa you you cut out the

10:59

rest of the leaf. Yeah yeah, which is like no no

11:01

no this is what it looks like. Like maybe it would

11:03

make sense if we saw the rest of it

11:05

but it's like just the top half. Okay

11:07

thank you. Another leaf. That is that

11:10

is perfect. Well said. That

11:12

is a great example. It's a great looking leaf. It's

11:14

very interesting. Yeah, it's got a lot going on. It

11:17

catches the eye for sure. Yeah, and they're

11:19

usually they're not thick and leathery, but they're

11:21

they're kind of thick and tough. So little

11:23

tough guy. It grows at the end of

11:26

these these fun twigs and it covers like

11:28

I said it's alternately arranged down the twig

11:31

and the twigs themselves have

11:33

these interesting buds. The buds

11:35

are covered in little hairs and oftentimes

11:38

in the the fall the leaves

11:41

will not fall away. They'll just kind

11:43

of die and kind of stay there.

11:45

We've talked about this before it's called

11:48

marcescence. Yeah. So during that time you

11:51

can often see these buds

11:53

growing right next to dead

11:56

leaves. So you can see the leaves.

11:58

You Can see the buds. The next. Year. Which

12:01

are kind of tall and skinny.

12:03

often undies little tiny stocks. And

12:05

they're covered in like a brown. Very

12:07

fine, I think the term. Would be

12:09

pugilist since yes so I just love

12:11

little teeny tiny hairs. It's not pubescent.

12:14

yeah it's pew be a lesson exactly

12:16

like adding an actor and to the

12:18

end of a spherical exactly the same

12:21

thing as the U L I just

12:23

like of you see some these dentate

12:25

name is Scott essentially triangle like serration

12:28

amount of the but if it's dense

12:30

you ways it's didn't violate that tiny

12:32

little time as I love it so

12:34

saw is it was really adorable little

12:37

thing. And. They have these flower buds, the

12:39

kind of them out and they look like. Little

12:41

bells those up there, just these little

12:43

circles in it. so. Looks like this little

12:45

this little kind of stem comes out in and

12:48

it just has. This little circular balls

12:50

does right at the very timid

12:52

the flower buds as the flower

12:54

buds ever so again often in

12:56

fall and early early winter like

12:58

December kind of early winter gem

13:00

you can see. Leaves you can

13:03

see the flower buds for next year.

13:05

While you can see that. Vegetative

13:07

buds for next year and assuming

13:09

it's old and thirty done this

13:11

before. You will also see the

13:13

fruit. Which. Is this adorable

13:16

little capsule? The grows

13:18

just under nice. Were all these

13:20

other new buds for next year

13:23

Are. In this is

13:25

something I love about this particular

13:27

plant is that you can see.

13:30

Fruit. From the most recent

13:32

year which explode that a basically

13:34

dries and then kind of cracks

13:36

and and kind of diseases go

13:38

fly off everywhere. Interesting next to

13:40

the fruit from this most recent

13:42

years that is still maturing next

13:44

to the leaves from last year

13:46

that are dead on. Stems with

13:48

all the vegetative parts and components

13:50

getting ready for next year. And.

13:53

Guess what? Alex would? You.

13:55

Go. To. months later then

13:57

you can also see them bloom

14:00

Wow as well. So the tree essentially

14:02

is a it's like a it's

14:04

like a rolling Review,

14:07

I guess I don't know. It just

14:09

it never goes from one phase to

14:11

phase two sure phase three Yeah,

14:14

it's always kind of finishing up

14:16

its last phase while it starts its next

14:18

phase And it does that with

14:20

multiple phases all at once. Oh the fruit

14:22

Casey. Mm-hmm To

14:24

me it sort of looks like if you took

14:26

an acorn. Yeah and a cone Oh, who

14:29

just sort of made them into the same

14:31

like an anamorph situation. Yeah halfway through that

14:33

transformation That's what we got here. That's

14:35

totally it I like the idea also of

14:38

that being like a chat beat GPT kind

14:40

of thing Oh, yeah, like show me what

14:42

a cone in an acorn would look like smashed

14:44

together. That's a good-looking fruit Yeah, it is. It's

14:46

kind of fun. They're only maybe like three quarters of

14:48

an inch tall. They're not very big. They're fun

14:50

Chill, yeah, so that's that's the

14:52

thing. Also, I should know in the fall they

14:55

generally turn an Amazing

14:59

like reddish orange color like the

15:01

leaves are just spectacular Wow Yeah

15:06

I want to talk about the flower. Yeah, you'll

15:08

notice that we kind of skipped over the flower

15:11

real fast This is our piece de resistance. It

15:13

is our piece de resistance. I believe because the

15:15

flowers are Amazing very

15:17

incredible. Have you seen these in real life? Oh,

15:19

yes. Yeah. Okay. What about you out there? Have

15:21

you I? I

15:24

love the to call and response It's

15:27

like blues clues Do

15:30

you see a witch hazel flower can you point to

15:32

it? No,

15:35

not there that

15:37

is a chameleon Yeah,

15:40

there are they are one of the

15:42

most alien flowers I've seen On

15:46

a tree that's not tropical like

15:48

it doesn't look like anything you've

15:50

ever seen No, and if you

15:52

think you know what you're looking at you probably

15:54

do but it's also still very confusing It's very

15:56

confusing you walk up to this and if you

15:59

go out right now now and you see

16:01

one of these trees blooming. Odds

16:03

are, which is why we're covering it the way

16:05

we are, it's this hybrid. There are

16:08

plenty of little cultivars

16:10

here and there of the

16:12

native one to North America,

16:14

just for geniana. They found a new

16:16

species actually in 2004, which

16:18

is pretty recent for finding a new species here

16:21

in the Ozarks down in the Southeast United States.

16:23

But 99% of the time it

16:25

is this very early

16:27

spring blooming hybrid between Japanese and

16:30

Chinese species that is planted most

16:32

often just called the witch hazel.

16:35

And it's got four petals

16:37

and four sepals on

16:40

its flowers. That's the first sort of

16:42

interesting character. Yes, it's got four rather

16:44

than five or six. Yeah, exactly. So

16:47

the other thing is that the

16:49

flower petals are

16:52

like wildly long. They're

16:54

like three-quarters of an inch

16:56

or an inch long, so like almost two

16:59

centimeters or more. And

17:01

they're very skinny and strappy. They look

17:03

like confetti stringers or something like that.

17:05

And they pop out and they are

17:07

kind of crinkly and they're right next

17:10

to a bunch of other kind of

17:12

crinkly looking flowers. And they're usually on

17:15

this teeny tiny little

17:17

flower that's maybe only a few

17:19

millimeters across with four very, very

17:21

distinct sepals. And often those are

17:24

red or an orangish color. So

17:26

you have this like dark red

17:29

sepal with this long

17:31

stringy looking petal that's coming out

17:34

from just above it. And

17:36

then you have this tiny little, all the rest

17:38

of the flower parts. Who cares? We

17:41

are completely taken by this petal

17:43

and its contrast with its sepal.

17:45

And they're just like they

17:48

cover this leafless twiggy looking

17:50

thing from head to toe.

17:52

And it's just stunning. It's gorgeous.

17:54

And it happens, Alex, in the dead

17:56

of winter. That

17:59

is particularly cool. I also say this

18:03

flower, I feel like a lot of flowers

18:05

kind of lack character. I

18:07

don't know. I see a lot of flowers and I'm like,

18:09

yeah, whatever. It just kind of looks like

18:11

they pulled them off a shelf when

18:13

they were figuring out what parts to put on

18:15

their trees. They

18:18

got everything else and then this, they're like, oh,

18:20

geez, we need flowers. Our budgets run out. What

18:22

are we going to do? We'll take light pink

18:24

with five petals that blooms

18:26

in spring. Great. Oh, that's great.

18:29

That's so popular. But

18:32

this one looks like it is

18:35

a creative soul and created

18:37

this flower from scratch. I

18:40

think that's perfect. It's so

18:42

interesting. It's the

18:44

eccentric ant who always has a glass

18:46

of wine, but who's also an artist.

18:48

Yes, and she's like really good too.

18:50

Exactly, like you think, okay, yeah, sure.

18:53

We see an ant Sally, but this is like, no,

18:55

no, no. Sally actually... Her

18:58

sculptures are very sexually charged. Yeah,

19:01

you're like, as a child, I didn't know why, but I spent

19:03

so much time in the backyard. Love

19:06

them. So cool. It's

19:09

just amazing. What a treat. Especially, you know, after

19:11

such a long, after such a

19:13

long dark, I mean, here in Portland, Oregon.

19:16

Yeah. Long, dark winter.

19:18

Exactly. You might see one of these and think, hey,

19:20

things are going to be all right. Exactly. And

19:22

Alex, don't you always? There's

19:25

two things that happened. One was walking around and I saw

19:27

them and they kind of catch me off guard because I'm

19:29

like, oh, oh, it's that time. It's

19:31

life. Oh, this is so great. And then

19:33

it like triggers me to look at a bunch of other

19:35

like little plants and things. Yeah. The

19:38

tiny little bulb things that come up around this time

19:40

as well. Oh, sure. But it also

19:42

happened to be that I covered it in my

19:44

tree identification book. Oh, wow. So

19:46

I was actively looking for some

19:49

of these trees to take some photos of and then

19:51

I noticed, oh, my God, they're also blooming right now.

19:54

Spectacular. Perfect time to take a photo,

19:56

Casey. Yeah, I was actually out taking

19:58

photos of buds. And this

20:01

nice old couple walked by and they were

20:03

like pretty spectacular, isn't it? And I was like, yeah,

20:05

it's going to be really nice. I think they said something

20:07

like, oh, in the springtime, it's going to be great.

20:09

Oh. And then they said, now that one right over

20:11

there is really going off. And I was like, oh,

20:13

yeah. And I looked over and it was a witch hazel.

20:17

And I was like, oh my God, that's so

20:19

exciting. I actually would have loved to find this.

20:21

Thank you, old people. And I helped them cross

20:23

the road. Anyway, so these

20:25

are trees that I specifically, like they

20:28

came just everything lined up

20:30

perfectly for me to be like, this is

20:32

what I'm talking about right now.

20:34

So Alex, I sat down and I started

20:36

doing research to say, OK, put

20:39

the cart before the horse a little bit here, Casey. What

20:42

exactly are we going to talk about with this

20:44

tree? And so two things came up. One is

20:46

etymology. And I kind of just wanted to hit

20:48

that real fast. Yeah, baby. Because I thought that'd

20:50

be kind of fun. Fucking get it. Have you

20:53

done any of the work on this etymology at

20:55

all? Have you looked into why it's called the

20:57

witch hazel? No, but I know sort of the

20:59

big Shyamalan twist to this whole thing. Oh, you

21:02

do. But but I

21:04

would love to just chat about it.

21:06

OK, well, have you done any any

21:08

of you type this into the etymology

21:11

dictionary? Yes, Casey, I have. Oh,

21:13

wow. I'm so glad. You

21:15

want to do it live? Yeah, let's do it.

21:17

What do you got? A bill O'Reilly it. Oh,

21:19

yeah. Well, witch hazel. Yeah. What do you got?

21:22

OK, Edimon line. Anybody

21:24

who's even vaguely

21:26

interested in etymology, a

21:29

necessary resource is great. Edom online,

21:31

E T Y M online dot

21:33

com. Witch hazel is a noun

21:35

comes from the 1540s. OK.

21:39

Old English, probably from Old English.

21:42

Weiss. Weiss or with

21:44

or with. Yeah. W I C

21:46

E. Right. That's right. Yeah. Which

21:48

means applied generally or vaguely to

21:50

various trees having client branches. So

21:53

you might you might call a tree Weiss if

21:56

it has bendy branches like a

21:58

willow. Exactly. not

22:01

like a willow more like an elm

22:03

okay and this is where I

22:05

thought this kind of got fascinating

22:08

Wow there there

22:10

is a species of elm tree

22:12

called the witch elm which is

22:14

Ole Miss glabra oh my god

22:16

no well so Ole Miss glabra

22:18

the witch elm was commonly used

22:20

for wicker things in fact that's

22:22

where the term wicker comes from

22:24

it also derives from with or

22:26

wick W-I-C-E which basically means bendy

22:29

wood exactly so they would take

22:31

the twigs and they would you

22:33

know turn them into these wicker

22:35

things everyone's familiar with wicker baskets

22:37

and chairs and stuff like that

22:39

so initially this tree the witch elm

22:41

was used for that very commonly so

22:44

when the Europeans came over to

22:46

North America and started to look

22:48

around at the plants they saw

22:51

this witch hazel they saw the native

22:53

one to North America which is Hema

22:55

Malice of Virginia so they would

22:57

call the witch hazel they

23:00

found the witch

23:03

hazel W-Y-C-H right which

23:05

is in a reference to a

23:07

tree that they called the witch hazel

23:09

tree which is an elm

23:12

tree but that elm tree is

23:14

not related to hazel in any

23:16

sort of traditional sense but

23:19

they would call it the

23:21

witch hazel tree because it

23:23

was the hazel that they

23:26

used for wicker amazing on

23:28

top of this the names

23:31

got changed from W-Y-C-H to

23:33

W-I-T-C-H do we know why

23:35

we can't be sure

23:38

but this historically has been

23:40

used for water dousing we brought this up

23:43

earlier right so water dousing we've talked

23:45

about also before I can't remember which tree

23:47

specifically we talked about it with but it's

23:49

the idea that you make this you get

23:51

a y-shaped branch and you

23:53

walk around I laugh only because it

23:56

seems very quaint now for people to

23:58

do this sure my Imagine

24:00

a big slingshot. Yes,

24:02

exactly. Without the rubber. Yeah,

24:05

and you hold it from the

24:07

Y spot, one bit

24:09

of the Y in each hand. And you walk,

24:11

and then allegedly, the opposite tip,

24:14

the base of the Y, bends

24:16

down. Not bends like you physically see the

24:18

whole thing, like Neo moving the spoon kind

24:21

of thing. You're

24:23

holding it just tightly enough that if

24:25

there's any amount of force that's pulled

24:27

on it, it will rotate all the way down in

24:29

your hand. I'm reminded of a Ouija board. Yes,

24:34

yeah, yeah, yeah. You're not really pushing it,

24:36

but you're letting it sort of, well, you

24:38

are. Exactly, someone is pushing it. It's

24:41

happening. So that is, it's

24:43

kind of like that. Ideally, allegedly,

24:45

it is somehow figuring

24:48

out where there's water. And

24:51

it will bend down towards water as if the

24:53

water is pulling it. You dig

24:55

there, you're going to find water, and that's where you put

24:57

your well. And so this

24:59

was like a witchcraft practice? A

25:01

little bit, it wasn't witchcraft so much.

25:03

It was more like, huh, well,

25:06

how are you doing that? That's weird. And it was

25:08

just kind of this folklorish kind of tradition.

25:10

A bit spiritual. Yeah, I think so, yeah.

25:12

But people would do it all the time.

25:14

They had no other way to find water.

25:17

But it was kind of

25:20

this weird magical kind of thing.

25:22

But then also, native peoples have

25:24

used witch hazel for a million

25:26

different things, mostly everything to do

25:28

with inflammation. To this day,

25:30

we still use it for these kinds of things. You put

25:32

witch hazel like an extract

25:34

on your skin, and it helps with inflammation.

25:37

With just about anything. You can buy it

25:39

right now in the store, it's everywhere. Very

25:41

commonly used, and it's effective. It's very effective.

25:43

But so the reason that

25:45

we're purporting, the spelling

25:48

was changed from W-Y-C-H

25:51

to W-I-T-C-H, is

25:54

because of its use in dowsing.

25:56

Yes, I think that and the

25:58

native peoples used it. for all

26:00

sorts of like stuff. Oh sure, okay.

26:02

Yes, and so then when the colonists

26:04

came over, they were like, oh there's

26:08

magical planets. It heals these people

26:10

over here, but it also like, we use

26:12

it to find water. Wow.

26:15

So I think it just over

26:17

time, sure, kind of got this

26:19

weird switch. Rebranding. It's never had

26:21

anything to do with like actual

26:23

like witchcraft, like you know the

26:25

crucible style. It's never had

26:27

anything to do with that. The crucible. I

26:30

adore that that is your first reference

26:32

for witchcraft. What else is there?

26:34

I can't think of anything else. Amazing.

26:37

Okay, wow. What an interesting, man.

26:39

I, can I, etymology.

26:43

Give it, yeah, give us your, what are

26:45

you thinking? I just love that it doesn't

26:48

just have to do with language.

26:50

Like etymology is like cultural. Totally.

26:53

More than anything. How do we use this term, that

26:55

term? Where have you come from? Like why do these

26:57

things change over time? And like, I

27:00

just adore it. I don't know how

27:02

to get quote into

27:04

it besides just like googling every

27:06

word that I'm curious about. But

27:09

if there were a hobby involving etymology, I'd

27:11

be on board in a second. Okay yeah.

27:13

For about three weeks before I move on to

27:15

like fly fishing. Yeah, that's very fair. But hey,

27:17

you'll know why it's called fly fishing. That's right.

27:20

Well, Casey, yeah, that's quite interesting.

27:22

So doesn't have anything to do

27:24

with witchcraft. Well, and ultimately

27:27

that was one of the first things I

27:29

thought was interesting I should look into. That is

27:31

the twist I was referring to. Yes. It

27:33

has nothing to do with witches. So I, when I

27:36

was initially looking this up, Alex, I let you know,

27:38

this might be a fun thing to talk about. That would

27:40

have been it for the podcast. We would have been saying,

27:42

great, that's our review of the witch hazel tree. And

27:44

I decided that wasn't good enough. Oh wow. And

27:47

then I realized it was just literally staring me in

27:49

the face this whole time. Why did

27:51

I want to talk about this tree? Why did I

27:53

want to put this here specifically exactly where it is

27:55

right now? Why did I type it in? Yeah. Because

27:58

I was stoked that it was blooming right now. So

28:00

I said, why don't I just talk about why

28:02

I'm so stoked about this tree? And

28:05

then it got me thinking about

28:07

seasonal affective disorder. Which

28:09

is, for those of you who are unfamiliar, who

28:12

live in the nice places of the world, often

28:15

the further north or south you

28:18

go, the more seasonal your

28:20

life is. Essentially

28:22

we get a really dark wintertime.

28:27

Our wintertime can sometimes just be the

28:29

worst. We have a lot of clouds.

28:32

So it's a very cloudy, dreary,

28:34

dark time. And ice and power

28:37

outages, not the worst

28:39

thing that's happening in the world, but it

28:41

affects us in a negative way. Sure, yeah,

28:43

exactly. So it also is

28:46

another big thing that I think comes along with seasonal

28:48

affective disorder is that a lot of the

28:50

leaves and all the plants are dormant. So

28:53

leaves fall, the plants go dormant, they

28:55

don't look like they're alive. For

29:00

all of the research that has

29:03

produced the results that seeing

29:06

trees in the color green makes us

29:08

happy, winter is especially

29:10

damning because not only

29:12

is it cold and cloudy and

29:14

dark, but the green

29:17

on the trees is stripped away from us.

29:21

On some of the trees, I should say. However

29:23

Alex, this tree

29:26

blooms, like we said, with

29:29

these fabulous flowers in

29:31

the dead of winter. And whenever

29:33

I see that, whenever that moment

29:35

happens, and I look forward to it every year

29:37

because I think these flowers are just so cool,

29:40

whenever it happens, my spirit's

29:42

left. So I

29:45

wanted to just kind of touch base with that and

29:47

kind of talk a little bit about the mental health of

29:49

people and how trees can have an

29:51

effect on that. I mostly wanted

29:53

to say, well we know scientifically that

29:56

seasonal affective disorder exists. We

29:58

also know scientifically that trees... It had

30:00

a positive impact on your brain,

30:02

on your your literal. Just

30:05

having trees and plants around make

30:07

you happier, less stress in all

30:10

the things we talked about the

30:12

and thousand times. But when you

30:14

put those two things together in

30:16

a situation like finding a witch

30:18

hazel growing in your neighbor's yard.

30:21

I. Was curious if that is

30:23

something that. Really like

30:25

Sparks joy in people. It's

30:28

like you see the very first

30:30

signs of life, not just like.

30:33

Been. Dormant but actively

30:35

blasting off like so

30:37

many sparklers. Yeah yeah, like.

30:39

It's not just like seen a daffodil or something

30:41

like just just pop up Craig's list, look at

30:43

a little tiny lease. It's coming. I know they're

30:45

I know they're on their way. Which. Is also

30:48

something it is. It's something you can

30:50

see the new growth right? Yeah that's

30:52

exciting but for this this is like

30:54

or it every one full bore were

30:57

do and if I were if like

30:59

Mardi Gras a giant party on the

31:01

street it's It's not like it's saw

31:03

a sign. Of life to

31:06

com. It is the life it is

31:08

it is it's it is at it's

31:10

peak power. Here we go Yeah flowers

31:12

the have this whole the whole thing

31:14

right? Like very much fertility. I want

31:17

to say Casey a few days ago

31:19

I was feeling on there's a lot

31:21

of changes happening my life right now

31:23

yes on some that will be good

31:25

but that feel bad now miss I

31:28

make sense is gross you know and

31:30

I will say every winter is all

31:32

tough for me. Some. Winters

31:34

been. Just fucking brutal

31:37

brutal winter. Ah yes, yes.

31:39

and I was talking my

31:41

friend Adrian. And

31:43

I said i. You know, I'm

31:46

things are times are tough and

31:48

she said i know I know

31:50

I saw some Daphne blooming it's

31:53

gonna be okay Yeah and I

31:55

was like you know what? It

31:58

is gonna be a good is. Another shrub

32:00

the blooms very early go

32:02

it also has like intense

32:05

smell the the night as

32:07

always darkest before the dawn

32:09

as mans ssssss. Where.

32:12

Did he come up with? I figure of

32:14

maybe Harvey Dent who said that? Ah but

32:17

yes, I, I, I, I This is a

32:19

perfect time to talk about this tree because.

32:22

Six read and whole thing local. There's

32:25

I and boy am I excited to

32:27

see some foliage. What? I. Think.

32:29

Is so great about this plant is that even though

32:31

it's not quite a tree even though we have to

32:33

like. Really like kind.

32:35

Of pull it over the line yeah I

32:38

think have the reason that answer willing to

32:40

do it is because. He gives me

32:42

so much hope Like a just is one

32:44

of these inspiring things. Their modern or has

32:46

been dreary. Everything's colds or winter than you

32:48

get this. One likes. Nice day

32:50

here in. Portland be called

32:53

the February seek out Yes yes,

32:55

million of Fall Spring Way. He

32:57

gets up to like fifty nine degrees

32:59

and everyone is out wearing sort of

33:01

to bars and like stain out in

33:03

parks. You know, great. It's is a

33:06

wonderful time. In the last two

33:08

days tim and then we got

33:10

another winter last other come through.

33:13

Exactly right I go. I was

33:15

so happy yesterday but I'm so

33:17

sad today. What change? Guess this

33:19

little tree though? Pulls. Itself

33:21

I think up over the line because

33:23

while we're in that one moment that

33:25

February sake out where everything is like

33:27

just nice for a second, then it

33:29

goes away when you go back outside

33:31

on their next dreary day. Like well

33:34

as dreary day. So oh my god

33:36

yeah, there's a gorgeous. Blossoming,

33:39

Witch Hazel right over there and use Go. Straight

33:41

to and images divine. Even

33:43

of little bit of the said to him than an incredible. But

33:45

there there was the sent licenses.

33:47

Laurel General has their own moral.

33:49

I do love, I do love

33:52

that case. You see? you know,

33:54

So I. Guess more so

33:56

proper spring time in Portland?

33:59

Yeah, every. But he does look

34:01

so beautiful and happy memories wearing cute

34:03

clothes and they're all just like bounce

34:05

and world is bouncing around minutes and

34:07

yet it's like who fill out there

34:09

for during times and am. I.

34:12

So often will like stop to

34:14

look at a flowering trees and

34:16

inevitably another you know, maybe and

34:19

a couple will be walking by

34:21

in. Also stop and will talk

34:23

about the blooming tree. so nice

34:25

to see that after the darkest

34:27

days. Yeah I that's exactly what.

34:29

I want to ask his seat you had the same kind

34:31

of. Thing: oh definitely. Guess it's like a

34:34

i'd be just makes me wonder if

34:36

like as a duty to people that

34:38

live a certain distance to the north.

34:40

You sow plant. A

34:43

bunch of witch hazel. A Wow

34:45

Athena everyone does not like. The.

34:48

Least it's a little bit of hope

34:50

this spring is coming a nicer. You

34:52

know this is a great idea to

34:54

Yemeni have like a which is a

34:56

p It is like a social movement.

34:58

My gas lamp. more winter flowering trees?

35:01

Yeah, why don't we do that? I'd

35:03

Honestly, they're not big trees, you know?

35:05

Okay, I did see it being. Like

35:07

this is like not gonna take up the

35:09

spot. Of a trees, We can't quite put

35:11

it there. I'll even know that the City

35:13

of Portland, for example, even includes it as

35:15

a small tree. I don't think so. I

35:17

think it's a shrub. Well, a lot of

35:19

the trees that are planted on the streets

35:21

aren't going to get that big. Anyway, Why

35:23

not? What? Us My: Not: put a witch

35:25

hazel? know? why not put a witch hazel

35:27

next to a bigger growing to? no? No.

35:30

Tyre. Tear the one that's already there

35:32

out of the around I see. I said put

35:34

it in the chipper. Ah as any. take the

35:36

Witch hazel, you lovingly put it in the ground

35:38

as Isis or you will be better. And

35:41

better blue light he must pay for

35:43

life says that While I'm like this

35:45

you know we have a hard with

35:47

large telephone. The health of. Amp

35:50

Yeah that there should. I feel like they're there.

35:52

needs to be some A okay. We.

35:54

Have the technology we do. There

35:57

are plants that bloom ends in

35:59

gender winter. Yes, Let's.

36:02

Play it more of them. Okay, so here's

36:04

here's what I said. Witch Hazel

36:06

should be on the top of that.

36:08

Less okay, let's plants. Vs

36:10

Specific. Species isis a

36:13

hybrid. All. Over the place

36:15

As like it doesn't grow, he doesn't

36:18

grow invasively to my understanding to being.

36:20

Played. It all of the place we

36:22

can plant Daphne and I think in

36:24

between probably a half the race. Let's

36:26

say for parts. Which. Easel

36:28

around two parts: Chameleon

36:31

evergreen, big plants, big

36:33

flower. And then

36:35

one part daphne okay I like know

36:37

like this plan will do that everywhere.

36:40

All those are shrubs demonstrably shrubs and

36:42

you know what? we're gonna call this

36:44

the green new deal Agreed a A

36:46

on and we got to get everyone

36:49

out. There are plenty of are you

36:51

young men who are coming back from

36:53

the war and got nothing. A member

36:55

of our up ah the says grace

36:58

put down the riveting gun and pick

37:00

up the spade hiccup were saying we're

37:02

plants and trees are obese of know

37:04

what Lansing Sra many shrubs other than

37:06

the case of this witch hazel for

37:09

the sake of our Scarab podcast. well

37:11

maybe it maybe Casey this this is

37:13

can also have an hour. I don't

37:15

even know for on or off topic

37:18

anymore but maybe this could be you

37:20

know a little bit of redemption story

37:22

for shrubs. oh I know you know

37:24

trees have the summer and fall. And

37:28

then the they die away. In winter they go

37:30

for i'm sorry, they go dormant in winter and

37:32

lose their leaves and that's all part of it.

37:34

and then. Pay. You know what? It's

37:36

hot, it's shrub time. I like them of

37:38

that. They're also the human level rise he

37:40

can see than their in your face that's

37:42

perfect for winter time. And love this idea!

37:45

Oh my gosh, I. Don't up. This is implied

37:47

Big trees, A pub. Oh. that's right so

37:49

you can have the best of all worlds this

37:51

is great every one your sunni here first unclear

37:53

where you are you don't need a permit played

37:55

a shrub the ah so you can go anywhere

37:58

in the city portland and you can plant the

38:00

witches Is that true? Yes, you can

38:02

only need a permit to plant a

38:04

street tree. Is this

38:06

true in most cities, you reckon? No. The

38:09

witch hazel is not a tree? Yes, okay, that I

38:11

reckon is true. But also

38:13

I reckon that most cities don't have any

38:15

requirements about what trees to plant. Some say, well,

38:18

we don't want you to plant this kind of tree here,

38:20

and that's about it. So if

38:23

this is not even a tree, and

38:25

it doesn't cause any invasive issues, and

38:27

it is not something that's going to

38:29

cause a crazy amount of damage somehow, which it

38:32

won't because it stays small, you're

38:34

good to go, you can plant it. I think

38:37

it's a perfectly reasonable plan to

38:39

battle sad. Yes,

38:41

oh God, I have to admit, one

38:44

of the best acronyms ever. Perfect.

38:47

Yeah. Is to plant more January

38:50

and winter flowering trees. Exactly.

38:53

Make yourself happy, give yourself that

38:55

beautiful lift in the moment where

38:57

you're just like, is

39:00

there anything that's going to happen? And I want

39:02

to say to people before we go to

39:05

go to our break and then give a

39:07

review to this tree, I want to

39:09

say, I know it's a really hard time, not

39:11

just where you are, but everywhere

39:14

else all over the world, terrible things

39:16

are happening. Nobody's being

39:18

held accountable. It's

39:20

bad. But

39:22

I don't want you to kill yourself.

39:24

And I know that's a bit straightforward,

39:27

Casey, but please don't. There

39:29

are so many options and so many

39:31

resources. This is a

39:33

really hard time a year, especially every year,

39:37

but you have people that love you deep

39:39

down. I believe this to be true. Yeah,

39:41

I think it's very good to know. And

39:43

I think it's also helpful just

39:46

in terms of mental health to go out

39:48

and look at the plants around you. Yeah. And

39:51

I think we know as a society that that's

39:53

a big part of what's missing. If

39:56

we are able to walk out, I know it's not

39:58

as easy for everyone, but if you can, everything sucks

40:00

just go walk outside for a little

40:02

bit it will help the worst place

40:05

you could be right now is glued

40:07

to your phone yeah exactly yeah go

40:10

outside and use your phone to

40:12

take a picture hey of Ham

40:14

and Melis cross-intermediate love it yeah maybe

40:16

that'll be a good way Casey we got to

40:18

take a quick break but that was our discussion

40:20

of the witch hazel we will be right back

40:22

with our review oh

40:38

welcome back to completely arbitrary that was

40:40

our discussion of the

40:43

witch hazel it's time

40:45

for our review oh boy

40:47

Casey it's gonna be a hard one Alex

40:50

I disagree who okay

40:52

gonna be very easy here you go

40:54

here's how it works we're gonna give

40:56

some final closing arguments on this tree

40:59

and then give it a rating of

41:01

zero to ten golden cones of honor

41:04

Casey as

41:06

our resident expert will begin with

41:08

you oh right I just

41:11

adore finding this tree I adore finding it

41:13

all times of year the leaves are fun

41:15

and it's one of those plants that it's

41:18

not super common like it's just common enough

41:20

it's one of those that you only know

41:22

about when it's doing something wild like I

41:24

don't know blooming in the middle of winter

41:26

sure you just walk around everything is the

41:28

normal like winter color and then there's this

41:31

poof of like dark red

41:33

or orange or yellow just

41:35

coming out of nowhere love

41:37

it I think that this

41:39

tree is underplanted as we've discussed

41:42

should be planted fourfold more than

41:44

it should vastly fourfold more than

41:46

it is now and

41:48

I think on

41:50

top of that sadly it's

41:52

still just a tiny little tree you

41:55

know and it would

41:58

be best with pals Unless

42:00

you plant a big one and you say you

42:03

are getting big and you put it in

42:05

the middle of your yard Oh, wow make

42:07

that thing become a large thing You don't

42:09

plan a little thing like I really think

42:11

you're gonna look nice as a little thing

42:14

You go in with the intention of making

42:16

it a fucking tree. Exactly. Yeah,

42:19

so that's what I would say Okay, I

42:21

love finding it. I love coming across states

42:23

under planted plant it more as a

42:25

tree though It is not quite the tree that

42:27

I think you should be planting alone

42:29

plant it as a group with other

42:32

things that will you know do more

42:34

tree stuff because I could watch If

42:37

I looked outside and I saw an entire

42:39

field of witch hazel all in bloom. I'd

42:42

be like wow amazing Yeah, cool But

42:44

I think if I also saw a forest of

42:46

trees doing something else I would be like wow

42:48

That's really cool and like way more intensive and

42:51

I like that better. I'm gonna give it a

42:54

Seven point two. Oh, I know that sounds

42:56

low. I know it sounds low but Alex

42:59

This is this is as high

43:01

as I can go Okay for it being something

43:03

that we have to pull across the line because it

43:05

makes us happy and I love

43:07

that it makes happy if it Didn't

43:10

have these flowers. It would be easily

43:12

a four. Hey as a shrub though

43:14

Yeah top tier top tier shrub. Okay,

43:16

so which hazel? Mm-hmm

43:19

Our reviews are gonna be so different Alex.

43:22

This is what's important This is why

43:24

we do this. So here's here are some

43:26

things I love but the witch hazel. Okay,

43:28

it has interesting etymology

43:32

and it's not just named after

43:35

a European man from

43:37

the 1700s Yeah,

43:40

it's helpful It

43:42

has an inch also the etymology is like

43:44

has a cool backstory to it. It doesn't

43:46

just mean something cool It's like through there's

43:48

some there's some evolution to it. That's fun

43:52

It also doesn't mean what you think it means that's

43:54

really cool, too Yeah, the fact

43:57

that this tree if

43:59

I'm being completely honest I didn't

44:01

even know there were trees that bloomed in

44:03

winter. Hey So

44:05

this is a big get for me. Yeah,

44:07

I'm like wow that's that's huge Because

44:10

not only does it not bloom in the

44:13

spring it blooms in the saddest part of

44:15

the year Which

44:17

is great which Hazel is great

44:21

Yes, which Hazel So

44:26

under the radar you didn't even notice

44:30

Yeah, man, I'm proud of myself. Yeah, I Love

44:33

that and I think we should plant more of

44:36

them all over the place all the time But

44:38

I like what you said about like they're

44:40

not necessarily a statement piece Plant

44:43

them along with something else or under something

44:45

else and it doesn't even need to

44:47

be you know Shade

44:49

tolerant thing because it's it's not gonna

44:51

be competing with most other trees. Yeah,

44:53

exactly. It's gonna be fine They're great

44:55

like on the edge. Yeah, how I

44:57

see them. I think that's wonderful. Yeah

45:01

I also think the flower is

45:03

so cool and so edgy. Oh,

45:06

I love that. I Think

45:08

it's like really creative and

45:11

it looks I don't know it looks so alien

45:13

but like in a really fun intelligent

45:16

way I Adore

45:19

this tree and you know what? I'm

45:23

giving it a nine point two Nine

45:25

point two cones of honor Wow as you

45:27

pull your coat down. That's right. I do

45:29

my little Picard Geez,

45:33

yes. Yes nine point two and I

45:35

am I am I will say your cones

45:37

of your own I was really hoping

45:40

for an Arboretum of Honor Maybe

45:44

I'll just do that in my head, you know,

45:47

I was gonna say man I would love to

45:49

hear a version of that that's like fully orchestrated

45:51

and I was like wait That's just the Olympics

45:53

on I got a good every Casey

45:58

that was our review of the Hey,

46:00

we hope you enjoyed it out there. It's

46:02

time to move on to our completely arbitrary

46:04

AMA. And Casey, I'm

46:06

having a little fun with this AMA. Oh

46:09

no. Because this is a question that's very

46:11

near and dear to my heart. Okay. This

46:14

one's from Katie. Hi, Katie. Katie says,

46:16

what would you like to see in

46:18

a tree video game? Oh.

46:22

Now, Casey is going to be about as lost

46:24

as I usually am when we talk about tree

46:26

things. Well, it's because we have to be... Yeah.

46:30

Even more so, because we haven't had a podcast

46:32

about video games for the last three years. That

46:34

is true, yeah. But you're no scrub, as they

46:36

say. You've played a video game or two. I

46:38

have. Yeah, I used to be expert mode on

46:40

Guitar Hero. Been listening to the pod for ages.

46:43

I'm a software engineer. Oh, okay. And the other

46:45

night over dinner, I was talking to my fiancé

46:47

about how I've always wanted to work on a

46:49

video game for fun in my free time, and

46:51

he was very supportive of the idea. That's a

46:53

good fiancé. I said the only thing I'd want

46:55

to make a video game about would be trees.

46:57

I love this. In this

47:00

hypothetical world where I somehow have

47:02

extra free time, what

47:04

would you like to see in my tree

47:06

video game? My only idea right

47:08

now is Stardew Valley vibes.

47:10

You know what Stardew Valley is? It's

47:12

like a little cute farming sim where

47:15

you can go into town and meet

47:17

the locals and things like that. Very,

47:20

very, very, very popular. But

47:22

you're an arborist and tree lover. Oh, in

47:24

this game, you're an arborist and tree lover

47:27

and have to protect the special trees of

47:29

where you live from a predatory logging company.

47:31

Whoa! Okay, so this is her idea so

47:33

far. Yes. You have to protect

47:36

the trees from a predatory logging company. That's right.

47:38

Oh my God. Now. I

47:41

have some thought. And

47:44

Alex opens up a spreadsheet. Yeah, I've

47:46

already got a document going. He even

47:48

has a budget. I

47:50

put on my little spectacles. You

47:53

should go first. I should have asked you this question,

47:55

Alex. Well, we're going to talk about it together. Okay.

47:59

All right. All right. because like I am the

48:01

video game guy. Yeah. But the

48:03

video game is about trees and you are the

48:05

tree guy. Yes, yes, yes. You'll have plenty of

48:07

input. I think so, but it all sounds great.

48:10

Well here's my thought, Casey. How about

48:13

this, a game where you're

48:15

managing a forest, you're managing every

48:17

aspect of the forest, you're kind of playing God.

48:20

You're managing like planting what where. You're

48:23

managing the animals involved.

48:26

Yeah. To give them a place

48:28

to live, things to eat, animals

48:31

that will, you know, a good pecking

48:33

order so you can't throw something out

48:35

of balance. It's kind of

48:37

like a game where like you will lose

48:39

eventually. There's a timer, you

48:42

know? Okay. Like you're going to

48:44

lose, but see how long you

48:46

can make this forest work. Interesting. And then

48:48

sort of the end game or like if

48:50

you're really, really, really good, you can just

48:52

have like a forest that is working on

48:54

its own. See, that's what I want. That's

48:56

what I think the end game is. The

48:58

win is that you've created a balance. Yes,

49:00

exactly. Okay, so I, the first

49:02

thing that I was initially thinking of is to

49:04

add some silliness to it because

49:07

just like a strict forest management game,

49:09

they actually have simulations for that in

49:11

forestry school. You're kidding. No, and

49:13

they are awful. Okay. It's

49:16

just basically grass saying, well here is,

49:18

you know, how are you going to

49:20

string your cable from your

49:22

yarder up here down to your spartree down here

49:25

and then pull all these logs up. What weight

49:27

do you have to have? How tall they need

49:29

to be? How is that a game? That's

49:31

just a test. It's not a game. It's just a

49:33

simulation. That sucks. So the

49:35

silliness you're imagining. I want the

49:38

trees to have personality. Oh wow.

49:40

So like you could choose in

49:43

what, Super Smash Brothers, I think, where like

49:45

each character has their own special thing that

49:48

they have. Sure, their move set. Yeah, exactly.

49:50

I think each tree, and there should be

49:52

hundreds of trees, should have their own move

49:55

set. For sure. Okay, well what do you

49:57

need? And maybe it starts with some random

49:59

objectives. You know yeah, yeah, yeah, so

50:01

that's how you would win the game you

50:03

have to accomplish your objective That's how many

50:06

of these survival the genre is survival many

50:08

of them start with make an axe and

50:10

that's your objective And

50:12

then 30 hours from then you you're like,

50:14

you know tricked out and you have this

50:17

Yeah, yeah, yeah from scratch. So I think that should

50:19

be the thing But you should be like a Lorax

50:21

character the spirit of the forest Wow Casey

50:24

so I yeah, I should say

50:26

more like a Kodami character I love it. So you're

50:28

running around and you know the trees You know

50:30

their characters and you can talk to them

50:32

and you have to figure out what's going

50:34

on Like the cottonwood for instance, maybe

50:37

one of the things is hey you need to uh, now

50:39

that you have this big forest Well, guess what? You don't

50:41

have any birds in your forest. So you got to start

50:43

getting birds in your forest What are you gonna do? And

50:46

then you don't have to like log it but you

50:48

can kind of move through and say, okay, cool I'm

50:50

gonna I think these trees over here need

50:52

to die. So I am going to Encourage

50:55

a beaver to come over here Casey Beaver is gonna start

50:57

doing things and then and then you let the beaver do

50:59

the work So you're not actively killing the

51:01

tree. You're just letting it happen. That sounds

51:03

like a great game Well, there you go. You thought

51:05

you wouldn't be any help. I thought you wouldn't be

51:07

any help I

51:11

would play the fuck out of that

51:13

game. Okay. Here's here's my here's my

51:15

kind of like, uh, Elevator, you know

51:18

blender pitch. Yeah, like this meets this,

51:20

you know, it's like Uh

51:23

forest management meets sim

51:25

city, which is kind of an older reference.

51:27

Yeah. Oh city skylines might be um That's

51:31

the only thing I was thinking sure that's why that's

51:34

why I need to do it. It's like windows 96. You

51:36

know what I mean Casey? Oh,

51:38

yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, imagine like

51:40

sim city, but instead of managing buildings

51:42

and districts. Yes, it is Forest

51:45

all forests. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, and

51:47

I think that would be I think I also would play that

51:49

game because it'd be fun It'd be fun to like figure out

51:52

where you're at, you know, like oh, I want to

51:54

manage a forest in the tropics

51:56

over Over in

51:58

this area and you can do all

52:01

That's your DLC, that you, downloadable content

52:03

that you sell for more later after

52:05

the game is popular. It's like the

52:07

game colon tropics. Right,

52:11

yeah. So

52:14

yeah, instead of getting little pop-ups that

52:16

say there's a traffic jam in the

52:19

southwest corner of your city, you might wanna,

52:21

it's like all of

52:23

the deer are overgrazing the

52:26

willows, you know, stuff like

52:28

that. Exactly, well you're gonna have to

52:30

encourage Habitat for a wolf. Yes. And

52:33

then a wolf comes in, yeah. Thank you, Katie,

52:35

for your question. I could talk, I could make

52:37

a whole podcast about that. Yeah, hey, that would

52:39

be great. Hey, if you've got a question for

52:41

us, wanna hear us blab at length,

52:44

join up and become

52:46

a Tremium member at

52:49

arbitrarypod.supercast.com. It is the place to

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be for arbitrary loving folk. That's

52:53

right, everyone's there who is there, for

52:55

sure. Casey, let's talk briefly about some

52:57

of the fun things that we give

53:00

to our Tremium members. That is a

53:02

great thing to do. I think the

53:04

first thing is a little bit of

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cash in your pocket. You sign

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up for any of our two

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tiers, and then you can get 15% off

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Cone Club allows you into

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our secret cone shop. Yes, so if

53:25

there was a cone that

53:27

we had last year, some

53:31

obscure cone that went by in a flash, and you

53:33

think, man, I would really love that one, you

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can go to the cone shop with a secret password,

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get in there, and take a look at

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believe officially we have every single

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53:49

That's incredible. Yes, we did that

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finally. We had to pan

53:54

it out a little bit to make sure we didn't

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overload ourselves. Yeah, for sure. And buy 10,000 stickers. Although

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we would love to. We would love to. You

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can also get a ton of extra bonus

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54:13

that you cannot hear on our public feed, and

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ad-free listening. That's right. For our

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And, Casey, it supports

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our DMs, why not? Yeah, exactly, works for everyone. You

54:44

never know what might happen. Casey,

54:47

clap! Alex Croson, another

54:49

great job. Thanks for sharing how

54:52

trees affect you. Oh yeah, thank you for

54:54

sharing how trees affect you. I

54:56

think during these dark days, it's important

54:58

to remember that spring is

55:00

right around the corner, and no,

55:02

things won't be better, but at least we

55:05

will have trees to look at. It'll be

55:07

a lot nicer. That's right. Thank you for

55:09

listening to this episode of Completely Arbitrary. Hey,

55:11

we'll see you next time. Goodbye! See you

55:13

later! Completely

55:24

Arbitrary is produced by Alex Croson and

55:27

Casey Claps. Our artwork is by Jillian

55:29

Barthold, and our music is by Abe

55:31

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