Recently I listened to a stress management podcast. I really liked her style and her content. It was odd, but there was one thing she said that struck me as she spoke about journaling: When we put our worries onto paper, it moves them from the emotions center to the thinking center. And then she moved on.

I thought, "I’ve given advice like that before. And moved on."

What I found myself wanting was examples. Stories. What did it look like when YOU did that? What worked? What didn’t?

That’s what we’re doing today.

First, I dug into that Stress in America report we discussed last week (click here to listen to that episode). I thought what do people need? What are they struggling with? As you may expect, the numbers were worse for women than for men, so I decided to go that direction for the next 3 weeks. Even though I’m targeting women here, the stories and advice transcend gender in many areas.

Next I looked at the top I for women, according to the report. They were:

58% family responsibilities50% consumed by worries regarding money49% relationships

So that’s where we’re going. Today, we’ll talk about family. Next week money. The final week, relationships

Next, I did some specific research and have 4 recent studies to share with you (Link and info in show notes at https://www.tamiwest.com/post/stress-awareness-month-part-ii-family-responsibilities)

So women want/need help! But what experience do I have to talk to you about family responsibilities? Here's a bit of my background:

· 3 biological children born 1988-1992· Had my 1st son when my 1st husband was in the military. We were in Wichita, KS with no support whatsoever and my son was a very colicky baby.· I was in a psychiatric hospital when they were 2,4,6· Single mom of those 3 from 1998-2003· Got my master’s degree during that time· Gained 5 stepchildren in 2003· Traveled while 5 of the 8 still lived at home· Took care of my mentally ill mother with dementia while traveling· Cared for my father with Alzheimer’s

Did I do a great job during these seasons? Let's evaluate 😁

What I did poorly

· Yelled. A lot apparently· Never said no or asked for help· Expected myself and others to be perfect· Put too much on my plate· Had unrealistic expectations· Had buried AND apparent resentment and anger· Saw my family as extra to my life (I’ll explain in a bit)

Finally, here's what I did well

I GOT HELP!

Help has lots of different outfits:

· Got a therapist when I got divorced. · Let my family help. · Took on a new view of family. · I learned by accident. · I matured.

I’m hoping that by laying the groundwork, showing you what it looks like, and not just saying do it, that you’ll be likely to try something. So, here are the 5 things I encourage you to do:

· Get professional help: EAP, counselor, live, online· ASK for help – family & friends.· Adjust your view of family, and make smart choices· Learn on purpose· Be patient as seasons changes

Love and Hugs! All links in show notes at https://www.tamiwest.com/post/stress-awareness-month-part-ii-family-responsibilities.

**Not intended to be therapy or replace therapy - If you need further help, please reach out to one of these resources or one in your area:

General Resources National Alliance of Mental Illness: https://www.nami.org Mental Health America: https://mhanational.org Mental Health First Aid Resources: https://www.mentalhealthfirstaid.org/ Celebrate Recovery: https://www.celebraterecovery.com/ About AA: https://www.aa.org/

Tami West, PhD Stress and Mental Health Expert Dr. Tami West uses her entertaining and compelling style to shine a new light on how to transform your life and discover solutions to life’s challenges.

Thanks for joining today! Connect with me:https://www.tamiwest.com/Facebook.com/tamiwestseminars [email protected]