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Shark Media Have

0:41

you tried sleeping? Hi, I'm Johnny Mack with

0:43

your daily comedy news. Boy, I had nothing

0:45

yesterday. Today I can tell I have my

0:48

fastball because I actually slept. Let's

0:50

see, the unionized writers at Sesame Workshop

0:53

are going on strike. I asked the late

0:55

bot to write some jokes. Late bot did

0:57

a good job. Cookie Monster's strike demands are

0:59

pretty simple. He just wants to change the

1:01

lyrics to, C is for contract. That's good

1:03

enough for me. Oscar the Grouch

1:05

loves the strike. He's like more trash talking and

1:08

refusing to work. This is the happiest day of

1:10

my life. That's a good

1:12

joke. That's like quality late night. I

1:14

could see Kimmel or Fallon doing that

1:16

exact joke. Ernie's bath time has

1:18

gotten pretty awkward. He keeps inviting his rubber ducky

1:21

to join the union and sing bath time

1:23

is the right time to collectively bargain. That

1:25

one feels a little Colbert to me. The

1:27

count could not be reached for comment about

1:29

the strike. He was too busy counting all

1:32

the reasons management's offer was unacceptable. One

1:34

grievance, two grievance, three grievances.

1:37

I don't do a good count. Actual late

1:39

night, Jimmy Kimmel, the Trump campaign pushed back

1:42

on reports that Trump fell asleep in court.

1:44

He said that was fake snooze. That's

1:46

terrible, but good. Rob

1:49

Schneider is calling BS on the notion

1:51

that he bombed in front of the

1:53

Republicans. This from TMZ. Schneider

1:55

called the report a hit piece and

1:57

even labeled it as woke propaganda. In

2:00

case you missed it, the report said

2:02

Schneider was supposed to do a 30-minute

2:04

show for some Republicans, but organizers cut

2:06

him off 10 minutes into the show

2:08

because his jokes were too raunchy and

2:10

off-color. Rob tells TMZ that he

2:12

did 50 full minutes, and that

2:14

event honchos knew exactly what they were getting into

2:16

with him. Rob said, I'm

2:18

not changing my material or apologizing for my jokes

2:21

to anybody. Enough with the woke BS. America's sick

2:23

of it. I did 50 minutes because that's what

2:25

I was paid to do. Nobody removed me from

2:27

stage. Somebody waved to me at the 50-minute mark.

2:30

He said he took the $50,000 he was

2:32

offered to perform and did so happily, and

2:35

then slammed the figure as devaluated by 26%

2:39

over the last three years, thanks to

2:41

Joe Biden. Jared

2:43

Kormichael told The Breakfast Club, I deeply

2:45

regret saying anything about Dave Chappelle to

2:47

the press. I want to say I'm sorry

2:49

for that. A non-apology. He doesn't

2:51

regret saying anything about Chappelle. He just regrets saying

2:54

it to the press. And

2:56

back in 2022, Kormichael told GQ, and I

2:58

agree with this, and Dave Chappelle, I hope

3:00

you're paying attention. Dave, do you know what

3:02

comes up when you Google your name, bro?

3:05

Your legacy is a bunch of opinions on trans

3:07

stuff. It's an odd hill to die on. I

3:09

agree with Jared there. Despite

3:11

all my coast-to-coast flying, I have not yet

3:13

caught up with Joe Rogan's interview with Neil

3:15

Brennan, but they were discussing SNL. Rogan

3:18

told Neil Brennan, SNL seems like they handicapped

3:20

themselves, like they're handicapping themselves less back then,

3:22

but now for sure. If you're on network

3:24

television, you're dealing with so many executives. They're

3:27

all terrified, and everyone's scared, and everyone's ideologically

3:29

captured. There's certain things you can't joke around

3:31

about. It's like, God, there's so much ground

3:33

you can't cover, and it's just you handicap

3:35

yourself. You just handicap yourself. The

3:38

real problem is the format is so restrictive. The fact that

3:40

you have to break for commercials, the fact that you

3:42

have a specific amount of time, all that,

3:44

you just can't compete with the internet because

3:46

of that. You just can't. I don't think

3:48

SNL's problem is the commercials, because you can

3:50

move those around a little bit, and 90

3:52

minutes is plenty of time, and you can cut

3:54

sketches. It's the network TV part. You can't

3:56

curse. You can't be out there. That's the big

3:58

issue. That said, we're

4:01

clean, Jerry Seinfeld, Jim Gaffigan,

4:03

Mike Birbiglia, for the most part, Brian

4:06

Regan. Me? That's

4:08

right, I'm in the same class as Jeff Foxworthy,

4:10

Jerry Seinfeld, Jim Gaffigan. My bourbon-related humor

4:12

is actually better than Jim Gaffigan's, so we'll get

4:14

to that in a bit. Conan

4:16

O'Brien Must Go is finally

4:19

premiering today on HBO Max Max

4:21

HBO. Yes, this is not the

4:23

long-awaited variety show that was a rumor,

4:25

but finally, Conan has made something for

4:28

HBO. The Wall Street Journal

4:30

says Conan O'Brien Must Go asks a

4:32

lot. It's a travel show based on

4:34

a podcast, two programming phenomena, of which

4:36

there is certainly no shortage, and the

4:38

resulting comedy is crazily uneven and profoundly

4:40

unrehearsed. The AV Club

4:42

said Max's travel show will delight

4:45

Coco fans. There will be obligatory

4:47

food-tasting, dress-up-sight gags galore. All

4:49

the while, our hero will wield the

4:51

full instrument of his pale, long form

4:53

as only he can to draw laughter

4:55

discussed from all who behold him. I'll

4:57

check that over the weekend. David Cross

5:00

is recruiting his super pals for a

5:02

star-studded show in Central Park. Summer

5:04

stage at Central Park, New York City,

5:06

August 8th, all right, John, who's playing

5:09

David Cross, of course, Bob Odenkirk, Sour

5:11

Silverman, Fred Armisen, Sean Patton, Zach Zucker,

5:13

Shane Torres, and more to be announced.

5:16

That's pretty cool. Tickets

5:18

go on sale tomorrow, 10 a.m. Eastern.

5:20

From Fox, here home for comedy news,

5:23

actor John Leguizamo attacked a pinata. In

5:26

a fit of rage on Tuesday after learning

5:28

Donald Trump was gaining support among Latino voters,

5:31

Leguizamo expressed dismay, saying, I mean, clearly Trump

5:33

isn't making any effort to get Latino voters

5:35

or make them a priority, but the thing

5:37

that hurts the most is that his lazy

5:39

strategy is actually working. Apparently,

5:43

Leguizamo let out a string of curse words

5:45

in Spanish aimed at Trump while attacking the

5:47

pinata. Jimmy Carr doing the rounds promoting his

5:50

Netflix special. I chose not to watch

5:52

it Tuesday night. I was home in front

5:54

of the TV and I could not stay

5:56

awake. So I held off on that.

5:58

Jimmy Carr said he was close. to death when

6:00

he was diagnosed with meningitis as a child.

6:03

He was on the podcast, Where There's a Will, There's

6:05

a Way, and he said, My first

6:07

memory is a lumbar puncture in limerick in the

6:09

general hospital. I was three and I think I

6:11

was always told it was very close to death.

6:14

The doctor sort of went, It's going to be very painful.

6:16

And somehow I'd heard the phrase and I went, You've got

6:18

to be cruel to be kind in the little child's voice.

6:20

And I kind of appreciated that thing of life because I

6:23

was always told, Oh, you nearly didn't make it. He

6:25

discussed how we would like to die now that he's older.

6:27

Jimmy said, I want my kids and the people to love

6:29

me to be able to tell a story like, Oh, Jimmy

6:31

died. Funny story. Food of South Africa. And he went on

6:34

one of those great shark cage experiences and he foregoed the

6:36

cage. He said, no cage for me. Thanks. I'll just jump

6:38

in there with a fish and I was ravaged by sharks.

6:40

That would be a way to go. That was

6:42

a setup for a shark story. He said recently I

6:44

was swimming with a friend in Key West and there

6:47

were sharks in the water and one sort of flipped

6:49

around would be swimming with these small sharks all day

6:51

and we slightly misjudged the size of this thing. It

6:53

was enormous and it flipped around and came at us.

6:55

And I remember just thinking the old joke, I don't

6:57

have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun

7:00

you. Just swim faster than my mate Henry. Then we

7:03

got back on the boat and the guys went, these are

7:05

just reef sharks. And I went, yeah, with the black tip

7:07

on the fin. And they went, Oh, whoa, Jimmy

7:09

said, but I think being torn apart by sharks,

7:12

that's a great story for everyone. This

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show is sponsored by BetterHelp. How's your social

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but like it was good for me. I want to

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Yesterday we did an intervention for

9:40

Jim Gaffigan. Ricky Gervais is

9:43

out hawking his vodka. And Jim, pay

9:45

attention to Ricky. This is how

9:47

you do it. Hi, I'm Ricky Gervais.

9:50

And I'm an actor, so I really care

9:52

about stuff. And

9:54

I want you to care about stuff, too. This

9:57

is Dutch Barn Vodka. It's made from

9:59

British apples. It tastes great and

10:01

the bottle is a hundred percent

10:03

recyclable. So it helps the environment

10:06

which as an actor I really

10:08

care about and if the only vodka

10:11

I drink on the private jet, so Dutch

10:15

barn That's it Jim. Just

10:17

do that. Don't try too hard Ricky

10:19

knows we're in on the joke Jimmy

10:21

trying too hard with that Chris Rock

10:23

is the voice of a new campaign

10:25

by the National Basketball Association you may

10:27

know them as the NBA the article

10:29

I'm cribbing from describes the National Basketball

10:31

Association as a global sports and media

10:33

organization Thanks The

10:36

campaign is where playoff mode this gets old pretty fast

10:38

I'll play some of it so you can get a

10:40

taste of Chris Rock here is playoff

10:43

Jason a thing Play off

10:45

Jason is not a thing. Okay, Peter. We all

10:47

know it's the same Just

10:50

ask playoff items. I'm not afraid.

10:52

Well, Brooklyn can't deny it That

10:56

official wait Oh

11:01

You get the idea Mike abs talked about

11:03

his friendship with Shaquille O'Neal this was on

11:05

Jimmy Kimmel live As

11:07

told Jimmy Kimmel Shacks my man Suggesting

11:10

the check is the kind of guy who'd gift

11:12

a Lamborghini to anyone and have said I ain't

11:14

giving up on that I'm keeping that for myself

11:17

earlier in the year Shaq named his

11:19

favorite comedians They included Eddie Murphy Richard

11:21

Pryor Mike Epps Kate Williams says the

11:23

article. I don't think Kate

11:26

Williams is correct I'm gonna guess a cat

11:28

Williams. Is there a comedian Kate Williams? Let's

11:30

check who knows maybe she's hilarious comedian

11:33

Kate Williams Enter

11:37

well Google said including results for

11:39

comedian cat Williams And but

11:41

they've offered me the opportunity to search only

11:44

for comedian Kate Williams. Let's do that. Ah

11:47

Kate Williams stand-up comedian. I'm on

11:50

just the tonic comm this is

11:52

a fun lark Kate

11:54

Williams is fresh on the UK circuit and she's

11:56

coming in hot starting out as a flyer with

11:58

delusions of grandeur Kate It now tells jokes

12:00

to whoever will listen and also to the

12:03

ones who won't. Now I'm not finding any

12:05

comedy by Kate Williams and when I search

12:07

for Kate Williams, a lot of stuff comes

12:09

up from some comedian named Cat Williams who

12:11

seems to have done some sort of noisy

12:13

interview a few months ago. Anyway,

12:16

Shkaylonel's favorite comedians are Eddie

12:18

Murphy, Richard Pryor, Mike Epps,

12:20

Corey Holcomb, and Kate Williams.

12:23

Little housekeeping I do see

12:25

on people.com. There's

12:27

a big article about Olivia Munn discussing

12:30

her battles with cancer. Malini is

12:32

tangentially mentioned but it just doesn't seem like

12:34

the kind of thing that we do here

12:36

on this podcast while Googling Kate Williams for

12:38

laughs. But if you want to read up

12:40

on Olivia Munn, you can do that on

12:42

People. Laura Murley will

12:44

record her first comedy special. She

12:46

specializes in set-up punchline jokes and

12:48

one-liners rather than storytelling. She admires

12:50

and is influenced by Mitch Hedberg

12:52

and Maria Bamford. You can catch

12:54

her at the Flophouse Comedy Club

12:56

in Brooklyn tonight. Donald Glover

12:59

is working on some sort of anime. Not

13:01

much is known about it. And

13:03

let's see what's happening at the festivals. John,

13:05

did you preload Melbourne? Nope. As

13:08

we're getting a little long here, I'll just tell you

13:10

some shows I won't pull clips today. Tomorrow I'll pull

13:12

a bunch of clips. How about that? Blake

13:14

Pavey! That's the guy I told you about at

13:16

the end of yesterday's show. He's the one that got into it

13:18

with the old man. Alright, Blake Pavey is playing. The

13:21

age says Pavey's stand-up delicately weaves elements of

13:23

darkness and light, moving the audience to the

13:25

brink of tears before landing a hefty punchline

13:28

that leaves them in stitches. No

13:30

clip, but Blake's show is called Still Kickin'. Maybe

13:32

go there and heckle him so you can make

13:34

the news. Maddie Week's show is

13:36

called Never Gonna Die. This is Storytime

13:38

Millburn. There's a picture of Maddie with

13:40

a skeleton puppet. It almost

13:42

looks Jeff Dunham-esque. This show

13:44

will cure everything that's wrong with you with one simple payment

13:46

of 15 to 25

13:48

Australian dollars. You can become immortal

13:51

and never experience a bad emotion ever again. Wow, that

13:53

sounds pretty cool. Beat Magazine calls the show a force

13:55

to be reckoned with in the comedy scene. Well, I

13:57

guess they call Maddie a force to be reckoned with.

14:00

The Plus One says, entirely captivating, squirrel

14:03

comedy calls Mattie Weeks a charming and

14:05

funny young comedian, a great person to

14:07

spend an hour with. Shane

14:10

Daniel Byrne's show is called, But He's Gay.

14:12

That's a funny title. Award-winning

14:15

Shane Daniel Byrne is Irish comedy's new

14:17

wonderkind in his mid-30s, once considered an

14:19

exciting talent of contemporary performance art in

14:21

Dublin. He messed that up

14:24

and is now a comedian selling out shows around the UK. David

14:26

O'Daugherty calls him my favorite new

14:29

Irish comedian for many years. Meanwhile

14:31

in Dubai, did you see they had so

14:33

much rain? Now I did Google

14:35

Dubai Comedy Festival rain to see if anything

14:38

was cancelled, nothing came up, but I do

14:40

see that the Metro is having issues from

14:42

all the rain. So if you're on your

14:44

way to Zorna Garg's show or Desi Laughs

14:47

or Stand Up at Belle Maisery, those are

14:49

the three shows today, you might want to

14:51

check on the Metro service or to make

14:53

sure that the show's actually happening. Stand

14:56

Up Belle Maisery, Egypt's first comedy factory,

14:58

is back with Belle Maisery Volume 2,

15:00

a showcase of an all-star lineup of

15:02

the finest Egyptian comedians. Belle

15:04

Maisery, which translates to, in Egyptian, will feature

15:06

some of Egypt's funniest men and women as

15:08

they strut their stuff, etc. That's

15:11

at the Coca-Cola Arena, so it must be

15:13

a pretty big show. And we'll finish up

15:15

with Moon Tower, because that's going to be

15:17

pretty robust today. Oh yeah, pull up a

15:19

chair. This is going to take me a

15:22

minute. Alright, 6 o'clock, Ian Carmel and friends,

15:24

6.30, Natalie Palamides, I don't care what comes

15:26

up and I see what just came up,

15:28

we're going to see Natalie. I think she's

15:30

fantastic, which means Johnny Mac is making you

15:32

miss Mark Maron at 7 o'clock. Now, I

15:34

love Maron. You guys know I love Maron, but we

15:36

can see Maron on Netflix. I guess

15:39

we can see Natalie on Netflix as well. Her last special

15:41

was on Netflix and it's fantastic, but I would want to

15:43

go see Natalie. 7 o'clock,

15:45

New York's finest. 7 o'clock, Moon

15:47

Tower Mystery Show. 7 o'clock, James

15:50

Adomian. Boy, he's great too. A

15:52

lot of great choices. 7 o'clock,

15:54

Celebrity Memoir Book Club. 7.30, Hit

15:56

List. Any names you would know

15:59

there, mostly. likely not. Britannic

16:01

at 7.30, I always love seeing shows

16:03

like that. The Joke of Painting,

16:06

Andy Kindler on that one. There's

16:09

a logo that makes you think of Bob Ross,

16:11

but it's clearly legally distinct. Let's see what this

16:13

show is. Imagine if

16:15

art icon Bob Ross taught one of those

16:17

wine-fueled ladies' night painting classes. Now imagine we've

16:19

replaced Bob Ross with a few comedians. Okay,

16:21

that sounds like a good time, but we're

16:23

at Natalie Palamiti's show. 8 o'clock.

16:26

Oh, this is so good too. Tag

16:28

it at the Creek in the Cave. Glarr

16:30

Brothers, Todd Barry, Rosebud Baker,

16:32

Jeremiah Watkins, Chloe Trost, Liza

16:35

Trager. The Glarr Brothers invite their

16:37

hilarious friends to do sets while they sit off

16:39

stage writing tags to pitch the comics on stage.

16:41

Oh, what a great thing. I

16:43

might have to cheat here and see

16:45

if Natalie's playing tomorrow. She's not. These

16:47

are some great shows. Lucas Zillnick at

16:49

8 o'clock. Sarah Schafer at 8.30. Hypothetically

16:53

we saw her yesterday. Olivia Flood

16:55

Wiley at 8.30. Two Dykes and a mic.

16:57

I love these titles. 9 o'clock. Stars

16:59

in Bars. The stars include

17:02

Sam Jay, Shane Torres, Drew Lynch,

17:04

James Dombian, and some others. At

17:07

9 o'clock, the Canadians of Comedy. Miss

17:09

Pat at 9.30. Stamped Town 9.30. Surrounded

17:11

9.30. Andy Kinler at 9.30. Rachel

17:15

Feinstein 9.30. Killers,

17:17

10.30. Unzipped at

17:19

11. Best

17:21

of the Fast After Party and the gosh

17:23

darn Comedy Jam at 11.30. That's

17:26

always a good show. All right, we're doing Natalie at 6.30.

17:29

You're just going to have to trust me on this. So let's

17:31

assume an hour and a half there. So we'll be free around

17:34

8. When you and I pretend

17:36

to go to comedy festivals, don't forget we have

17:38

magic time traveling ability where we can get across

17:40

town in five seconds. So let's

17:42

see, at 8 o'clock we've seen Sarah

17:44

Schafer already. Hmm, should

17:47

we wait till 9 o'clock? Want to do

17:49

Canadians of Comedy? You want to do Rachel?

17:52

Kinler's gotten a little negative from me, especially on

17:54

Twitter. Let's

17:58

do Canadians of Comedy and then let's

18:00

do... the gosh darn comedy jam at

18:02

1130. Tomorrow is very robust as well.

18:04

And that is your comedy news for

18:06

today. Hey, don't forget, I also host

18:08

five good news stories, number five good

18:10

news stories. Apple has been promoting that

18:12

for three weeks. So that thing took

18:15

off. Thank you Apple Podcasts. All right, see

18:17

you tomorrow. Some

18:19

people just know the best way for you is a

18:21

rate based on you with also not

18:24

one based on the driver who treats the highway

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