0:02

I've just seen a man with no armed cycle

0:04

past me. I'm not sure

0:06

of his name, but his face rang a bill.

0:12

Turns out that Lance Armstrong was not only

0:14

taking drugs, he was pedaling

0:16

two.

0:21

It's my first week working at the bicycle factory

0:25

and they've already made me a spokesperson.

0:32

What's the difference between a well dressed man on

0:34

a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?

0:37

A tire.

0:43

Daughter texted me this in the morning. I

0:46

can't wake up this morning, feel

0:48

like a bicycle too tired.

0:56

Where do bicycles go for a drink around here?

0:59

Handlebars?

1:05

Every day I go for a walk, I get hit by

1:07

the same bicycle. It's a

1:09

vicious cycle.

1:14

Why did ET's bicycle only turn left?

1:17

Because Americans have unalienable rights?

1:26

What was the first Italian bicycle? The

1:29

Pinna farthing? Did

1:33

you hear about the guy who was arrested for riding

1:35

a bicycle made of marijuana? He

1:37

was pedaling dope.

1:48

In order to save money, I decided to stop

1:51

using tires on my bicycle. So

1:53

far, the idea hasn't gained any traction.

2:03

How many birds can ride a bicycle? Two

2:05

can?

2:11

We'll return with more laughs following this short

2:13

break. What do you call

2:15

a girl sitting on the handlebars of a bicycle?

2:18

Is a bille?

2:26

I wanted tickets to Olympic track cycling

2:28

event. I asked everyone I knew

2:30

for tickets, but all anyone could do is suggest

2:32

someone else to ask. In the end, I was

2:34

just going round and round.

2:40

I saw plenty of squirrels this morning cycling

2:42

through the park. I don't know how

2:44

they can afford bikes.

2:51

What do you call a bike trail that shows no empathy

2:54

a cycle path?

3:00

Shark can swim faster than me, but I can

3:02

run faster than a shark. So

3:04

when a triathlon, it would all come down

3:06

to who was the better cyclist.

3:12

How do flowers ride a bike with

3:14

its petals?

3:17

What do bikes and humans have in common? They're

3:20

both bipeddle.

3:24

The police came around last night and told me my

3:26

dogs were chasing people on bikes. I

3:28

told them my dogs don't even have bikes.

3:33

Mary Poppins retired from her nanny job

3:35

to ride BMX full time. Now

3:38

she's known as Wheeley Poppins.

3:43

I'm Bob Jeffy and I'm Montgomery

3:45

Jones, and we're the spokesman for National

3:48

Bicycle Day. We're on a mission to

3:50

spread the laughs and groans far and wide, so

3:52

please do us a favor and share just one of these

3:54

jokes with your family and friends today.

3:56

Thanks.

4:04

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4:07

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4:09

It's our weekly roundup of the best dad jokes,

4:11

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4:14

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4:17

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4:19

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4:23

The Daily Dad Jokes Podcast is produced

4:25

by Classic Studios. See the show

4:27

notes page for social media links and joke credits.

4:30

This show was recorded in front of a canned studio

4:32

audience.