Most of us are pretty poor listeners. And the problem with that is that it doesn't build good relationships. Not high-trust ones. Find out how to utilise the power of staying silent to become better at listening.

Transcript:

I reckon the vast majority of us
Are pretty poor at listening.
While someone is talking to us
We’re probably busy thinking about our view, not theirs.
We’re getting ready to tell them what we think.
And when the gap appears, bang! We’re in....”Yeah, well, I once had one of those...”
Or, if there’s no gap, we butt in even!
What it shows
Is that most of us want to be acknowledged.
We want to be thought well of.
We want to feel part of the action, to belong.
But, it often comes at the expense of building genuine understanding of others.
And of letting others feel good about themselves, their views or their life.
Let’s consider the tremendous power of staying silent.
When someone’s talking
Say, sharing their understanding of a situation,
Let them talk.
Ask them why they say that.
Ask them what else.
Seek to understand (as Stephen Covey said) before trying to be understood.
I’d go one step further.
Don’t try to be understood.
That’s all about you.
Make it about them.
Even if you know that they’re not totally right, let them be.
What’s more important? 
Being right or being there.
Getting all the facts straight or having a great chat?
Of course, it depends on the situation
But in a lot of cases
You don’t need to jump in to show the other person how intelligent you are
Or how correct you are, 
Or how incorrect they are.
It doesn’t matter.
Go for the relationship rather than the rightness.
It’s actually far stronger to know and not say
Than to have to say regardless.
So stay silent and let ‘em speak.