0:00

called open because the normal released

0:03

day for Dear Hank and John, it came and went.

0:05

And you were like, what happened? And

0:07

we were like, what happened too? Well, it turns out I

0:09

sent Tuna a file that was a total of one

0:11

second long. And then we had to

0:13

go through a whole bunch of work. Thank you to somebody on Twitter

0:16

who helped me with with with a little bit of tech

0:18

support to extract the file from Garage

0:20

Band and the episode is

0:22

saved. But I also wanted tell you

0:24

that the subscription window for the awesome socks

0:26

club is open now and will be closing

0:29

on November fourteenth. The awesome socks

0:31

club is an opportunity to get

0:33

a delightful pair of socks delivered to you

0:35

once every month designed by

0:37

a different independent artist. We work really

0:39

hard to make these socks really lovely. We now

0:41

have both ankle socks and crew socks,

0:44

and also a hundred percent

0:46

of the profit goes to charity. It goes to

0:48

decreased maternal and child mortality in Sierra Leone

0:50

because here's the situation. You're gonna have

0:52

to buy sucks from someone? And

0:54

is that somebody gonna be some stranger who's gonna

0:56

get the profit? Or is it gonna be in

0:59

a way where hundred percent of the profit

1:01

gets donated to charity. It's a

1:03

really lovely experience once the months you just get

1:05

them be happy. You can cancel anytime. Shipping

1:07

is free. It's an awesome socks dot club. And if

1:09

you go to awesome socks dot club slash DHJ

1:12

dear Hank and John DHJI just wanted

1:14

to make it short for you. You'll get five dollars

1:16

off your first month. That's a

1:18

deal. It's a deal. So

1:20

go

1:20

to awesome socks dot com slash DHJ

1:22

right now. While you're listening to us, have a

1:24

spooky, extra spooky episode and

1:27

also not know what the future holds

1:30

for Twitter dot com. Though, you

1:32

know that future, but we in the past

1:34

did not. Anyway, awesome socks dot

1:36

club slash DHJ

1:38

Let's continue. with the podcast.

1:44

Hello and

1:45

welcome to Dear Hank and John. George,

1:47

I for it to think of it, dear John and Hank.

1:49

It's a podcast where two brothers answer your questions,

1:52

give you the best advice and bring you all the week's news

1:54

from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon.

1:56

John, did you know that in Florida

1:59

alligators can grow up to twenty six

2:01

feet? Is

2:03

this a Halloween joke or

2:06

Is this a socks club joke?

2:09

means they have to get thirteen subscriptions

2:11

to the awesome socks club. I

2:17

should have seen it coming. Can alligators

2:19

really grow up to twenty six feet or did you

2:21

make that up? Like in

2:23

length? Yeah. I just picked

2:25

the number. Oh, okay. I was

2:27

like, that seems way too long

2:29

because I I've seen the world's largest

2:32

alligator and

2:34

I don't think it was twenty six feet long.

2:36

You have also seen the world's largest alligator.

2:38

It surfaced direct next

2:41

to our canoe in child. Do

2:44

you remember this? I do remember that,

2:47

yes, I don't think it was. The longest

2:49

The the Florida state record for a crocodile

2:51

is ten feet or fourteen feet.

2:53

So they only need crocodile. Well,

2:56

no. That can't be I don't I don't know why I said

2:58

crocodile, John. I'm an allocator. Yeah.

3:00

I'm offended as a Floridian. And

3:03

very rarely, do I identify

3:06

as a floridian let alone get offended? There's

3:08

there's gotta be a bigger alligator than that.

3:10

So the awesome socks club

3:12

is taking memberships now, awesome

3:15

socks club dot com.

3:17

Nope. Is the your no. Hank is

3:19

the URL. Well, that's one that's one

3:21

of them. Yes. For for an amazing reason.

3:24

The reason awesome socks club dot com

3:26

is the URL. is because a

3:29

fan of ours buck noticed

3:31

that it was redirecting to an

3:33

unsavory site awesome socks

3:36

club dot com. And so he bought the

3:38

URL and gave it to the awesome socks

3:40

club one hundred percent of the proceeds, go

3:42

to support stronger healthcare systems and impoverished

3:44

communities You can learn more at awesome

3:46

socks dot club or awesome socks club

3:48

dot com. Also, we

3:50

have two announcements. One,

3:54

it's Halloween. There's

3:56

soccer. It is Halloween.

3:59

There's soccer leading announcement. There are two

4:01

soccer games we're doing, I don't even know if you

4:03

know about this, John. Great. One,

4:05

we're doing ankle socks. So you can choose

4:08

between the socks that go up high and the socks

4:10

that stay down low. a lot of people were like,

4:12

we want those socks that stayed on well and we

4:14

listened. That's what they always say. We

4:16

were listening to our customers. We heard

4:18

you. We heard you said

4:21

that you are dishappen liking

4:23

the lack of a dislike button. We

4:27

we can't bring the dislike button back, but

4:29

we can make shorter socks. And

4:31

so we've done that and I've put them on my foot and

4:33

they're nice. I like them. Great. It's

4:36

not for me. I feel rather scandalous

4:38

having them to my ankle out Oh, yeah. No.

4:40

I definitely want the lower calf

4:42

socks. Yeah. But but for

4:44

many people, this is the ideal sock.

4:46

And second, we are now

4:48

shipping out of the European Union,

4:50

which means that you can get

4:52

the awesome socks club in Europe and not have to

4:54

worry about weird

4:56

customs charges. Hooray.

4:59

Hooray. That's great. Sign

5:01

up. And in Europe, they will they will

5:03

ship from the Netherlands. So

5:06

it's Halloween. We're gonna talk

5:09

to the part of the podcast where we answer questions

5:11

from our listeners, and we're trying to focus this week

5:13

on some spooky questions. Oh,

5:15

some fear based spooky. Spooky.

5:17

Questions. Although our producer, Rosyahanna,

5:20

wrote, I tried to focus on questions about fear,

5:22

but then I realized that almost all

5:24

questions are about fear. except

5:29

for questions about socks. Which

5:31

is just be delighted once a month

5:34

for getting a delightful pair of

5:36

socks. Yeah. That's the one for the

5:38

month. arriving just like to

5:40

make you happy once a month from a different

5:42

independent artist. Maybe we should

5:44

make it fear based. If I've learned anything from

5:46

American politics, just to make things fear

5:48

based. Like, do you know what will happen

5:50

to your naked feet if you don't become an

5:52

awesome soccer club subscriber? It will

5:54

be brutal. It's horrid out there.

5:56

It's terrible world for

5:59

feet specifically, and

6:01

and our socks will make

6:04

it so that you are not socially ostracized.

6:07

by your in group.

6:09

Do you want to feel part

6:11

of a of an affinity community?

6:13

If so, I mean, never

6:16

actually feel alone again at awesome

6:18

socks dot club. One of my favorite things

6:20

about the sock. that when I see people wearing the socks,

6:22

I can be like, hey, and I pull them into my

6:24

socks. And then they're like, hey, I

6:26

know. It's great. It is really I was

6:28

I just I just spoke at hard not to brag.

6:31

And one of the students I met

6:33

with before my talk, you know,

6:34

like, did the did the subtle pants

6:36

leg raise, and they were like,

6:39

And I got mine I got mine on

6:41

two. Don't be caught without them.

6:43

Alright. This first question comes

6:44

from Alicia who writes Dear Judge in

6:47

Hank. I know we talk a lot about how

6:49

human life expectancy has gone up in recent

6:51

years. It's

6:52

gone up so much. And not just in recent years,

6:55

In fact, in recent years, it hasn't

6:57

gone up as much. I'm curious, is this

6:59

because we just managed to stop dying of

7:01

disease and starvation so much? Or were

7:03

people officially dying of old age of

7:05

thirty. Always aging Alicia.

7:07

Alicia, you've asked my favorite question. Thank

7:09

you for allowing me and we'll talk about it. stepo,

7:12

forever, onto my soapbox. Can

7:14

I tell you what I think?

7:16

Tell me what you think.

7:18

People did it was not like there's

7:20

two different things. There's life expectancy

7:22

and there's life span. So

7:24

life span is like, how well, I'm

7:26

just go I'm not saying I know what I'm talking

7:29

about. I'm just talking. Great. There's

7:31

there's an amount there's, like, a length of time that a

7:33

human can live, which

7:35

is -- Uh-huh. -- based on a number

7:37

of things. But one of the big ones is

7:39

pure dumb luck. So

7:41

so you can be in a society where like the average

7:43

person dies at fifty and someone makes it to ninety

7:45

just because they didn't get hit by

7:47

as many trucks or trains

7:50

or wagons or whatever people

7:52

got hit by back in the day. Right?

7:55

Sort of. That's But, like, people have

7:57

always lived a long time, but

7:59

they just, like, the things that could get

8:01

them along the way, they had to be luckier to

8:03

get that far?

8:04

That's largely

8:06

correct. So

8:08

for a long time, like when I was a kid, I was

8:10

taught that basically, old age

8:12

was forty in the old days. Like, the

8:14

old days were never quite defined, but that was the

8:16

definition of old age. Like, if you lived to be forty,

8:18

it was some kind of miracle. Right. And

8:20

that's not true, but the

8:23

the sort of popular belief that has replaced

8:25

it is equally untrue, which

8:27

is that if you survived to

8:29

the age of five or ten, you

8:31

were likely to live a long life,

8:34

like you were likely to live to seventy

8:36

or eighty. and neither

8:38

of those is quite the truth.

8:40

So the main reason life expectancy

8:42

was actually below thirty

8:44

for all of human history until the

8:46

last couple hundred years was

8:49

because of incredibly

8:51

high rates of child mortality,

8:53

probably over fifty percent.

8:55

And so for instance, from what we

8:57

can tell in iron

9:00

age, France, life

9:02

expectancy was probably close to ten or

9:04

twelve. Oh, god. It

9:06

because

9:06

your

9:07

chances of dying before the age of ten

9:10

were probably significantly

9:13

above fifty percent, but certainly

9:15

not much lower than fifty percent.

9:17

Mhmm. And So that is the main

9:19

reason why expectancy was low. And if you

9:21

lived to to adulthood, you had a

9:23

reasonable expectation of living

9:25

to be sixty or seventy or

9:28

eighty. However, it

9:30

is also untrue to say that life

9:32

expectancy has not changed

9:34

since

9:34

since eighteen

9:36

hundred for ten year olds. It

9:38

has changed a lot. Like, even if you survive

9:40

childhood, life expectancy has

9:42

gone way up. one of the main reasons

9:44

it's gone way up is that until

9:46

two hundred years ago, from, like,

9:49

seventeen hundred to eighteen hundred, Around

9:51

a quarter of all people died of

9:53

tuberculosis. And

9:55

they died of tuberculosis generally

9:59

in their twenties

9:59

or thirties. And so that that

10:02

was a huge

10:03

strain on life

10:06

expectancy. Yeah. You know,

10:08

the guy who developed blood transfusions

10:10

-- Yeah. -- he was experimenting on himself and

10:12

he he he was trying to figure it all out. And

10:14

and, like, they didn't know about blood types. So

10:16

he was ruling the dice a lot.

10:18

Yeah. But he he died probably

10:20

because he took blood

10:22

from the person who he knew had

10:24

tuberculosis. Wow. He'll put it into his

10:26

own body. Well, he he probably didn't know

10:28

that tuberculosis was Well,

10:30

an infectious condition. Yeah. Exactly.

10:32

He did not. Well, it was believed to be

10:34

inherited by a lot of people. Somebody

10:36

actually listened to this podcast

10:38

recently sent me a fascinating fascinating

10:42

data set and presentation about

10:45

the debate over whether tuberculosis

10:48

was inherited or

10:50

infectious. And it

10:52

totally makes sense that people thought it

10:54

was inherited, like, why

10:56

else did all the bronchasis year's

10:58

die of tuberculosis. Mhmm. But,

11:00

like, you know, somebody living two doors

11:03

over, that family never

11:05

got tuberculosis. It was it was a

11:07

weird and remains a really weird disease.

11:09

So anyway, it's

11:11

both that we've gotten

11:13

better at treating diseases and

11:15

healthcare has gotten better

11:17

and that we have gotten vastly better

11:19

at preventing child

11:21

mortality, although it's still much too high. It's

11:23

all of those things. And even it continues

11:25

to be, like, people are living longer now

11:27

on average. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, even in

11:29

the sixties in America because of, like,

11:32

better treatments for cancer and heart disease.

11:34

Yeah. That's it. That's it. You know? Like

11:36

stuff stuff that, like, we've been alive to

11:38

see happen. Absolutely. I mean, child

11:40

mortality globally has fallen by more than

11:42

fifty percent since I graduated from high

11:44

school. Yeah. So

11:46

these are big changes and

11:48

globally despite the challenges of

11:50

COVID and the setbacks associated with it, which

11:52

aren't limited to COVID, life

11:55

expectancy has continued to

11:57

increase over the last three years

11:59

and long may that continue? This

12:01

next question comes from Diana who asked dear

12:03

Hank and John, but mostly Hank probably.

12:05

What happens to a human body? If

12:07

it gets buried on the moon.

12:09

Well, that's a good question. Some

12:11

Some days soon we'll be having people living

12:13

on the moon, so probably they

12:16

will die on the moon. I'm guessing

12:18

they're all the usual creepy Crowley things

12:20

that help decompose bodies on

12:22

earth and no oxygen to help out all those

12:24

IKE processes. So does the body

12:26

just

12:26

hang around Like normal?

12:28

Like

12:29

forever? Mhmm. A woman wondering, but

12:31

not a wonder woman Diana. Wow.

12:34

Mhmm. Well, Hank. Yeah.

12:37

Is it a is it a mummy situation?

12:39

It's a mummy situation.

12:41

It depends it depends

12:43

what you do, what kind of mummy situation

12:45

you get yourself into. So

12:47

if if the body was just on the

12:49

surface, it would very

12:51

quickly dehydrate and it

12:53

would become like very

12:55

much of that kind of mummy. But

12:58

I think there's probably a depth you can get

13:00

it at where it's far enough outside

13:02

of the sunlight. that it's gonna freeze

13:05

before it has a chance for

13:07

all that water to get to to get

13:09

out. Mhmm. And so it'll be down there. It'll be hard

13:11

for the water to get out So you just be a

13:13

frozen body popsicle.

13:15

Mhmm. But in either case, it's gonna

13:17

be either too dry or

13:19

too cold So

13:21

if you're in the sunlight, you can stay warm, but

13:23

you will lose all your water. If you're buried,

13:25

you'll be too cold, and you'll keep your

13:27

water. But either way the microbes will not be able

13:29

to do their microbe thing because they will either

13:31

be dead and desiccated or

13:33

frozen and waiting for some future where they

13:35

would get warmed

13:36

up.

13:38

Alright. So either way though, it would be

13:40

bad. Just to be clear, you don't you don't

13:42

wanna die on the moon. You wanna die

13:44

here. I mean, it's equally

13:46

bad for me. No. No. No. It's way. How are you

13:48

gonna get buried at Crown Hill? There is no

13:50

Crown Hill on the moon? Yeah. Well,

13:53

I don't wanna be You it's it's up to

13:55

you, John. The whole

13:57

joy of being

13:59

buried at Crown Hill is getting to

14:01

join all of the people whose

14:03

tombstones I've walked past lo these many

14:05

years. If I just die on the moon, I'll be dying with

14:07

strangers. Here's what we're gonna do,

14:09

John. Yep. Here's what we're gonna

14:11

do. We're gonna go with AAA

14:14

coring rod. Mhmm.

14:15

the And

14:16

we're gonna core every gravesite

14:19

and crown hill. and then we're gonna

14:21

move just the, like, bits of the

14:23

core that went through the part where the coffin

14:25

was. Oh, wow. And we're gonna take those all up to the

14:27

moon and we're gonna recreate Crown

14:29

Hill. Yeah. on the moon. And

14:31

then all future of vice presidents have

14:33

to go to the moon before they die. That's Wow.

14:36

Wow. Once you're not a vice president

14:38

anymore, you go to the moon. It's like we

14:40

don't we don't trust you to be here on earth,

14:42

getting involved in our business. You're a

14:44

vice president. You can get up to all kinds of

14:46

nonsense. Just go to the moon. the

14:47

vice president of America after

14:50

leaving office automatically becomes

14:52

the vice president of the moon, but there's

14:54

a bunch of vice presidents of the

14:56

moon. Right at all. And they don't have

14:58

any by committee. It's a purely

15:00

symbolic role.

15:01

It's like it's like being the Duke of Wellington

15:03

or whatever, the monarchy. Yeah.

15:06

k. And, yeah, I love I love

15:08

that idea. And also, I think the idea

15:10

of moving eighty thousand

15:12

coffins to the moon is

15:14

just it's the kind of thing a billionaire

15:16

would love. Like, that's the most

15:18

inefficient use of capital since

15:20

Elon Musk tried to buy Twitter. I

15:23

mean, John, by the time this podcast comes

15:25

out, the deadline will have passed.

15:27

And so we will actually know whether or

15:29

not that happened. So to all of you in

15:31

the future, Honestly,

15:34

right now, we're not even thinking about it. It doesn't seem

15:36

that important anymore. But it will I'm sure

15:38

it will then. It will totally seem

15:41

important. I mean, it's

15:43

it's the best way I've ever

15:46

heard of to turn forty four billion

15:48

dollars into zero dollars.

15:50

I mean, like, less than zero dollars because it's

15:52

like you just bought something

15:54

really annoying. It's

15:56

like it's like buying a forty four

15:58

billion dollar rooster and putting it in

15:59

a in a cage in your house and you can't get rid of

16:02

it. It

16:05

just doesn't doesn't even lay

16:07

eggs. No. It just does

16:09

nothing but scream. It's upset.

16:11

It's sexually frustrated. It's

16:14

angry. It's imprisoned. It's

16:16

in a permanent state of outrage.

16:18

It cannot believe

16:20

the horror the existential horror

16:22

of its situation. And you know what's

16:25

funny? You agree.

16:27

Everyone's on the same page.

16:30

You are completely empathetic

16:32

to the rooster's position of

16:34

like I don't wanna be here. Why am I here?

16:36

This is one weird to know your cousin.

16:38

Nobody wanted this rooster. Nobody,

16:40

like, woke up in the morning in two

16:42

thousand six I think I'll create a

16:44

situation in which a human has to co

16:46

habitat with a miserable rooster.

16:49

And yet, and yet

16:51

we can't find a way out of the

16:53

bind rooster. Yeah.

16:55

Yeah. I mean, the yeah. The the strange thing

16:57

is that every morning I wake up.

16:59

and I turn on the rooster. The

17:03

first thing the first thing I do each

17:05

morning is check to see

17:07

what what the rooster crowed overnight.

17:09

Yeah. What does the what does the rooster have

17:11

to yell at me right now?

17:14

Well, the thing about this

17:16

analogy is that in the analogy, I

17:18

am equally the

17:20

person who is confused to be living

17:22

with a rooster and I am

17:24

the rooster who's, you know, who's gonna be living with

17:26

the person. I am both people. Like, I get

17:29

on I get on drighter, but and I and

17:31

I crow all kinds of all

17:33

kinds of panicked outrage.

17:36

And then I look at other roosters

17:38

and I'm like, why are they growing so much?

17:40

Why can't they? I can't. They

17:43

just be quiet. But

17:45

at least I am wise enough to know that

17:47

I don't wanna own all of the

17:49

roosters. Like,

17:51

I don't I don't I don't think it would

17:53

be better if only I was in control

17:55

of the roosters. You

17:57

know, like, it would Exactly. If I was

17:59

I don't wanna fix this problem. If I was

18:01

the dictator of his rooster farm,

18:04

the world would not be better. That's

18:08

what exactly. He was like,

18:10

I real I wanna pay forty four billion

18:12

dollars to be the dictator of the

18:14

world's largest rooster farm. And

18:16

like, what a bad deal. Once

18:19

again, they don't lay

18:21

eggs. It's not a farm, John. It's a

18:23

community. It's a community of roosters and none

18:25

of them happy. They

18:27

all choose to be there.

18:30

That's right. They

18:33

wake up in the morning. and they leave their,

18:35

like, comfortable rooster lives to

18:37

live in front of, like, a tiny

18:39

miserable rooster fence off

18:41

all be inside of you on Musk's house.

18:44

Like, it's so mad. Don't do

18:46

that. I don't know.

18:48

I might not I'm it might be difficult.

18:50

I mean, I have not thought hard about this because

18:52

I don't I don't know whether or not it's

18:54

the thing. But I don't know how I will

18:56

feel about about I

18:59

guess I will I will not be about my

19:03

supposition as it will not be about who owns Twitter. It

19:05

will be about how the that that

19:07

person's decisions impact the experience

19:11

and how I think that it is affecting me

19:13

in the world. And so I will just, I guess,

19:15

have to see But I

19:18

don't I don't know. I don't think that I am being

19:20

well served by Twitter. Yeah.

19:24

Being a part of my life. No.

19:26

One of the weirdest things about Twitter is

19:28

that everybody on Twitter knows how

19:30

terrible it is. Right? Like -- Yeah.

19:32

Twitter is a huge problem. TikTok on the

19:35

other hand. That's gonna solve all our

19:37

problems. No issues at all.

19:39

I love Every time I

19:41

believe this though, Hank, like, every time I'm

19:43

like, this one solved the

19:45

major issues. And then

19:47

about months in, I'm like, no. B reel has its own problems.

19:50

Well, oh, really? B reel has its

19:52

own problems. Sure. That's that. That one did

19:54

seem like it would would mostly be okay.

19:56

Oh, I haven't used it. It's got its own

19:58

issues. Alright. But I don't need

19:59

to know

19:59

about it. Here's

20:02

here's in in reality of,

20:04

like, Fun. Fun time

20:06

over. No more new rooster fun. God,

20:08

that was great. Why don't we go back to the bit?

20:10

I think that we solve a lot of problems

20:13

and then in the process of solving them, we create a lot

20:15

of problems. And I think

20:17

that there's obviously

20:19

value being delivered to

20:22

me and others by social media

20:24

platforms or else we would not use

20:26

them. Yeah. Now is that

20:29

value commensurate with

20:31

its costs. I don't know. Is it

20:33

especially when we look at the costs

20:35

on society as a whole, I don't

20:38

know. I don't know. A lot of people different people have a lot of different

20:40

theories about why we are, where we are.

20:42

And I think they're probably not

20:44

just Twitter. No. I got one of

20:46

the emails we got this week was from somebody

20:48

who was like, hey, I'm listening to old episodes of

20:50

the podcast and I noticed that

20:52

John made not being

20:54

on Twitter his entire personality for

20:56

about a year and a half.

20:59

Why why is he on Twitter again?

21:01

And to that, I can only

21:03

say, What

21:03

you don't seem to understand is that I am a rooster

21:06

and every morning. I

21:08

I wake up and for reasons

21:10

that are miss steers to me,

21:12

I begin crowing and

21:15

and I cannot stop. Now

21:17

we can move on to the

21:19

next question. These questions from Mary Beth

21:21

who asks, Dear Hank and John, I'm wondering where

21:23

in the world I could live that would be farthest

21:25

away from any venomous creature.

21:29

Not Antarctica? that would not really be viable for me.

21:31

Is there anywhere else where I could

21:33

live without fear of

21:35

venomous creatures? I guess

21:37

I'm not so concerned about poisonous

21:39

things, though, if I think too much about it,

21:41

maybe I should be. Yeah. Watchful

21:43

and waiting, Mary Beth. Mhmm.

21:45

So poisonous things are things that hurt you when you eat them, venomous things

21:47

are things that hurt you when they bite you

21:49

-- Right. -- just for clarity. Right.

21:51

And or stab you otherwise

21:54

poisonous things, it feels more like a mistake

21:56

or a choice. Whereas venomous

21:59

things feels like you have a complete lack

22:01

of agency, yeah,

22:03

just in your bed one morning. And I think

22:05

the lack of agency is a big part of

22:07

what freaks us out. Yeah, I think that's a huge

22:09

part of all fears. this is this is

22:11

why we are constantly trying

22:13

to impose

22:16

thoughts of agency onto our

22:19

our lives. which when we do not have them, but we like

22:21

to impose them. Right.

22:23

So my this question reminds me

22:25

of when my daughter was younger

22:27

and we

22:29

would be like, where would you like to

22:31

go visit? And she would be like,

22:33

well, not Hawaii. Yeah. And then

22:35

I would be like, well, Hawaii is great.

22:38

And

22:38

she would say, yeah, but the

22:41

volcanoes. And also, I don't wanna go to

22:43

California because of the earthquakes, and I don't wanna go to

22:45

Florida or the entire east

22:47

coast because of the hurricanes. And

22:49

at

22:50

some point, Indiana starts to

22:53

look pretty darn bad. Suddenly

22:59

you're like, hey, do I live

23:01

in the best place?

23:04

There's no fire season

23:06

like there is in Missoula. Mhmm. It's

23:08

not bad here. But anyway, Hank

23:10

is and by the way,

23:13

relatively few venomous creatures,

23:15

very few venomous snakes. Nice.

23:18

No scorpions that I

23:20

know of. I feel like we don't

23:22

have tarantulas. Well,

23:24

I think the answer could be Indiana.

23:26

It's not. But I'm sure that you're

23:28

doing the list. But Debockey did a bunch

23:30

of work. And Debockey -- Okay. What's

23:33

this? -- come up with a place

23:35

that does not have mosquitoes. Mhmm.

23:37

It does not have ticks. It does

23:39

not have snakes. Whoa. Oh.

23:42

Any venomous snakes of any kind.

23:44

Wow. In this place, is

23:46

a lovely place that you been to. Yeah. And many people like

23:48

to visit. Oh. But that does experience

23:51

a fair amount of

23:54

increment whether it is Iceland. Iceland.

23:57

Yeah. The home of the world's

23:59

greatest hotdog and the fewest

24:01

venomous animals. I

24:03

was I was shocked. I was like, no

24:05

mosquitoes everywhere has mosquitoes. But

24:07

apparently, the -- Nice. -- the the

24:09

way that they're Well, to be

24:11

fair, what it is. The

24:14

fact that you were I was not I'm

24:16

not surprised to where they don't have mosquitoes because

24:18

when I visited there in August,

24:20

and the tour guide and without

24:23

a trace of irony said

24:25

in their sweet Icelandic accent as

24:27

you could see Iceland should be

24:29

called Greenland and Greenland should be called Iceland

24:31

because as you can see the weather here is

24:33

quite nice as the, like, forty

24:36

degree temperature

24:38

was made well below freezing by

24:40

a fifty mile an hour wind. It

24:42

was causing rain to hit

24:45

us at completely horizontally.

24:47

Like, it it appeared that the rain was

24:49

coming from the ground.

24:51

And this woman's face was being,

24:54

like, completely distorted, like

24:56

like a hundred meter runner going

24:58

thirty miles an hour or whatever.

25:00

And with with absolutely no

25:03

self awareness was talking about

25:05

how great the weather is in ice melt.

25:08

Well, apparently, it's not just

25:10

that it's cold. It is

25:12

So Although it is. It

25:14

although it is. But I know like Alaska,

25:16

for example, lots Lots of mosquitoes.

25:19

Lots of world capital with

25:21

mosquitoes. So it it it is that they have

25:23

several large freeze thought

25:25

cycles throughout one year. Mhmm.

25:27

So what what moon mosquitoes like

25:29

happen to find themselves in

25:31

Iceland, they it gets cold, they

25:33

lay their eggs, and then

25:35

and then it gets warm and the egg's hatch,

25:38

and then it gets very it's like it gets

25:40

extremely cold again. Yeah. Yeah. There's like

25:42

one of those August freezes. Yeah. They've never been

25:44

able to figure out the weird freeze thaw

25:46

cycle of Iceland, and so it doesn't have the

25:48

mosquitoes, which sounds lovely

25:50

to me. And Iceland seems

25:52

quite nice. I love it. I think

25:54

it'd be a tricky language to learn and but,

25:56

you know, there's three hundred thousand of them.

25:59

So you basically hang out with everybody. Yeah.

26:01

I feel like you can get by in English,

26:03

but I I it would probably become an

26:05

impediment to intimacy at

26:07

some point. Yeah. To to close

26:09

friendships. Right? So

26:10

world's greatest hot dogs, no

26:13

mosquitoes,

26:14

not bad. Not

26:15

bad. This

26:16

next question comes from Radu,

26:18

who writes Dear, John, and Hank. How do we

26:20

know that knocking an asteroid as

26:22

NASA's dart mission recently did? would

26:25

for sure make the collision with Earth

26:27

less likely. Like due to

26:29

the huge distances involved, surely

26:31

we don't know a hundred percent if and where

26:33

the asteroid would hit us only probabilities.

26:35

Isn't there a chance that had we not

26:37

messed with it? It would have scraped

26:39

by, but because of the intervention,

26:41

the asteroid would would hit the earth full on

26:44

without further redo.

26:46

I think that this is

26:48

the best way narratively

26:51

-- Mhmm. -- for humanity for

26:53

humanity to end. We

26:59

calculated that there was a ninety eight percent chance that

27:01

this was gonna save all humans and a two

27:03

percent chance it was gonna kill everybody.

27:05

And we took the gamble because it was

27:07

the right choice. Got a wrong

27:09

choice. Like, we made the objectively

27:12

right choice. But sometimes

27:15

sometimes you roll two ones in a

27:17

row. Sometimes the house loses. You

27:19

know what I mean? Yeah.

27:22

So

27:22

is there

27:23

is this a possibility,

27:25

Hank? Because, obviously,

27:27

I love humans. I think we are

27:29

profoundly underrated species. but we

27:31

are gonna go out at some point, and this would

27:34

be a hell of a way to go out.

27:37

So we do know

27:37

well, first of

27:40

all, this this

27:42

particular the dart mission in particular

27:44

was designed to understand this better.

27:46

So the dart mission was not designed to protect us

27:48

from an ass that asteroid is never gonna hit us. It's still

27:50

never gonna hit us. We

27:53

wanted to hit an asteroid with something

27:55

and see how much

27:57

it's direction changed.

27:59

We know the mass of the dart

28:01

probe. We know how fast it was going.

28:03

We know roughly the mass of

28:06

this asteroid. and we

28:08

know where it would have gone, but

28:10

we don't know how it's gonna respond to being hit

28:12

by a thing because asteroids are

28:14

like, they're still a bit of a mystery. They're made

28:16

of, like, sometimes they're, like,

28:18

a pretty loosely, like, held

28:21

together pile of rubble. that's just

28:23

like the gravity and electrostatic forces are

28:25

making it stick together. But,

28:27

like, is there something strong and

28:29

hard deep inside? Or is it just like

28:31

loosely held together, rebel all the way through. Those

28:33

things behave differently in different simulations, so

28:35

you wanna try it out, just do a

28:37

real life mission in if it

28:39

works. And that's what the mission was designed to do. But and

28:42

and and

28:42

and is there something strong and hard

28:44

deep inside? We don't know yet.

28:46

The the data is

28:48

yet to come, you

28:51

know, making it

28:53

easier. So but

28:55

we are aware that this that

28:57

this asteroid, like, there is

29:00

some variance. It's not a

29:02

hundred percent, but we have a really good idea

29:04

of where things in space are heading because there isn't

29:06

that much that changes their direction. It's

29:08

not like they're in an atmosphere where the wind is

29:11

blowing a different way every moment. There

29:13

are some gravitational thing

29:15

like effects out there

29:18

that that are gonna have small impacts

29:21

and at a very long distance that

29:23

matters. But as they get closer, we

29:25

have a really good idea where these

29:27

things are gonna head. And we do know that,

29:29

like, that nudging them

29:31

could, like, like, would decrease

29:33

the odds. At the same time, even

29:36

going very fast an object the size of dart, which

29:38

is not very big, isn't gonna have

29:40

a huge impact on

29:43

the direction and asteroid is going, but we do

29:45

wanna have a better idea of how

29:47

that is gonna be affected.

29:49

So that's why we did the mission. And we're still

29:51

waiting to see how like

29:53

how much it did change the trajectory

29:55

of the asteroid. Mhmm. But

29:57

we're not in any imminent danger.

29:59

of a asteroid apocalypse.

30:02

No. In fact,

30:03

we are we

30:06

are in less danger

30:09

right now than any

30:13

moment so far in human history, in that

30:15

we now know where all the big asteroids

30:17

are. Right. So we were we were we're

30:19

the we're in the same level of, like, of

30:21

of of danger. We just didn't know.

30:23

Now we know that we're not in any

30:25

danger. Follow-up question. In terms of

30:28

nonasteroid apocalypses, where are

30:30

we? Well, in terms

30:32

of from space, comments are a whole different story.

30:35

And could and could be a bigger could be

30:37

a bigger deal because they they come kind of out of

30:39

nowhere. Thanks for that. because

30:41

there's much farther away. Sure. Sure. And but

30:43

then in terms of various

30:45

other non space related apocalypse Things

30:47

look inside the atmosphere. Where's your vibe

30:49

for that? Yeah. Yeah. You know, like,

30:52

I'm I'm pretty optimistic about

30:55

humans, but less about

30:57

any individual institution

30:59

these days than I was once.

31:02

Right. Yeah. a lot of things lot of

31:04

things felt really solid there for a

31:06

long time in

31:08

my life. And and it does feel it does feel a little

31:11

bit little bit more up in the air at the

31:13

moment. You would wake up in the morning and you would get

31:15

out of bed and there the floor would be. And

31:17

you would be like, oh, just like

31:19

always, there's the floor. And

31:21

then as Emily Dickinson

31:23

put it, a plankton reason broke, and I

31:25

dropped to down and down.

31:28

Here's another question. I've always

31:30

been of afraid of going outside when it's dark,

31:32

says Rebecca. But now that I'm moving into my

31:34

own place for the first time, I need advice on

31:36

how to beat this fear. As

31:38

a wheelchair user, I constantly feel vulnerable and worried

31:40

that I could easily be kidnapped or something.

31:42

How do I make myself brave enough to leave

31:44

my front door after dark with

31:47

love Rebecca. Rebecca

31:50

coming to the world's number one source

31:52

for advice on

31:54

going outside in the dark as wheelchair user? Dear Hank and

31:56

John. Well, yes. Obviously,

31:58

Hank, we're not qualified to answer any of these

32:00

questions. You're also not in a strong number.

32:03

But It's good point. I

32:05

I do have advice here. Number

32:07

one, like, bring your phone. I'm a

32:09

big believer in -- Sure. --

32:12

accommodating fears. You

32:14

know? Yeah. And share your if you could share your

32:16

location with a friend or a loved one. The other

32:18

thing I was going to sign I do that. Share your

32:20

location with a friend or loved one or

32:22

several. I have, like, three people who can find

32:24

my location at any time. And so I have

32:26

backups, Hank. It's like the, you know, like

32:28

how there's the president or the

32:30

vice president than the speaker of the house in

32:32

case anything goes real real south.

32:34

Yeah. because I'm gonna check and see if I

32:36

can see where you are. Right? It's very possible. I'll share

32:38

my location with you. I I definitely

32:40

should. Thanks. But I is that's, like,

32:42

way more intimate than giving someone a key to

32:44

your house. I

32:47

just saw that fire. That's

32:50

weird. Sorry. Sorry. I hung up on your

32:52

ass. Did you hang up on it? Did you hang

32:54

up on me while you were trying to find your

32:56

site? I was trying to find your

32:58

location. So I'm in

33:01

Indianapolis, spoiler alert. But the

33:03

other thing but the other thing that

33:06

I I So so there are

33:08

those so there are those just functional

33:10

things, but when it comes to the fear

33:12

itself, like obviously I'd encourage you to talk

33:14

to a therapist or or some

33:16

professional, like Hank and I are not psychology

33:18

professionals, but I can't say one thing that works

33:20

for me with fears, which is, oh

33:22

my god, he did it again.

33:25

Alright. That's the last time you get

33:27

to hang up. Sorry.

33:30

That's just in the middle of saying something

33:32

important. I know. just stop

33:34

working. You can figure it out out on the

33:36

podcast. I did it. Can you see me? You did

33:38

it? No. But I but you can see

33:40

me. Yeah. Okay. So those are

33:42

like practical things, but the other thing is that if

33:44

you're concerned about it, I would really encourage

33:46

you to talk to a therapist or a professional

33:48

about it like Hank and I are not

33:50

psychology professionals. I can tell

33:52

you something that works for me, which is instead of

33:55

denying the fear or saying

33:57

like this is a silly ridiculous

33:59

fear,

33:59

acknowledging the

34:02

reality of the fear and that, like

34:04

-- Mhmm. -- the thing that you're afraid of is

34:06

scary. It's just not likely. and

34:08

that there's a difference between the size

34:10

of the likelihood and the size

34:13

of the scariness. And if

34:16

I can be aware of that, I find it a little

34:18

easier to keep from catastrophizing because,

34:20

like, the your fear is

34:23

real. It's rational. And sometimes,

34:25

like, I can get down on

34:28

myself and feel like, oh, all of my fears are just

34:30

like crazy

34:32

and irrational. and

34:32

the way they express themselves or like the

34:34

size of them is often not rational. But

34:37

the underlying fear,

34:38

fear

34:39

like, is real. It would

34:41

be a huge bummer for me if Earth got hit by

34:43

a comet, which I just found out is

34:46

possible. We'd probably spot it.

34:48

Like, it it couldn't just happen right now, the

34:50

way I gamma ray bursts. So I'd have, like,

34:52

I'd have, like, a week notice. That's my

34:54

dream is to have a week notice

34:56

that everyone on Earth is gonna die in the

34:58

sun. I agree that that would be bad. What I'm

35:00

saying is like, you don't have

35:02

to worry about being obliterated right now this very moment by a comment. I would Hank,

35:04

that would be fine, obviously.

35:06

And I guess you're right.

35:10

What I'm not afraid of being obliterated

35:12

instantaneously without any warning by a

35:14

comment. I'm literally afraid of

35:16

warning. Well,

35:19

if I if look, if I'm ever in a

35:21

position where I know you're about to be be

35:23

obliterated, I won't tell you.

35:25

I don't know. Maybe maybe I maybe I want

35:27

you to tell me actually now that putting it

35:29

like that. Well, I don't want, like, important

35:32

information kept true. Well, if okay.

35:34

If it's if it's more than a week, I'll

35:36

tell you. If it's less than a week, I'll just let you live your life and we

35:38

could play ball guys until the end.

35:41

I

35:43

like how you're imagining that in this

35:45

hypothetical scenario, you're the only person

35:47

I speak to regularly. Like, we're

35:50

in, no no no no. I'm the only one who

35:52

knows in this and -- Oh, okay. Okay. But usually -- so I won't

35:54

have a hit, except that you're gonna call me up

35:56

and say, hey, I'm gonna need you to play

35:58

handcuffs for

35:59

the next three days nonstop. Oh, as John, I'm coming to

36:02

Indianapolis. I'm not gonna tell you

36:04

why. I'm I'm on the next

36:06

flight. I wanna spend a little time with you and

36:08

mom and dad. And just

36:10

because I love you. Which game play fall, guys.

36:12

No big deal. Like, that's I'm gonna beat that

36:14

Spiderman game if it's the last thing I do and

36:16

it may be It might be.

36:21

Oh,

36:26

golly. reminds me to to

36:28

by fall guys. Fall

36:30

guys. It's apparently the

36:32

thing Hank

36:34

would do If he only had a few days to live -- Yeah. -- just

36:36

be, like, shut it all down. It's time to

36:38

play golf guys. This podcast is also

36:40

brought to you by the the the

36:43

a planck in reason. The Emily

36:46

Dickinson's planck in reason. Get it

36:48

at Home Depot today. Oh, it's

36:50

gonna break. It's I'd

36:52

already broke. Yeah. And

36:54

of course, today's podcast is

36:56

brought to you by Elon Musk's rooster.

36:59

We are all about

37:01

to be Musk's rooster. And also

37:03

this podcast is brought to you by vice president

37:05

and saw in the moon. The vice

37:08

president's on the moon, they disagree with each

37:10

other about everything and have

37:12

no power. I

37:14

love I love the idea of like

37:16

a House of Lords that's just the old

37:18

vice presidents, and they meet every now and again, and they they hang up.

37:21

They just hang up about stuff, and

37:23

then they issue statements. Yeah. Oh.

37:26

Oh, it'd be a powerless royal.

37:28

The dream.

37:30

Alright. Hank, let's do a thought experiment real

37:31

quick. If we owned Twitter, first

37:34

off, I would

37:36

hate you so much if we still owned

37:38

Twitter. If like we'd started Twitter

37:40

and you made me still own

37:42

Twitter, I

37:44

would be so resemble. Yeah. That's the first thing. It would

37:46

devastate our French though

37:48

because every time I talked on the

37:50

phone -- Yeah. -- I would

37:52

be like, How's the family? Also more

37:54

importantly, when can we sell

37:56

Twitter? Why are you

37:58

forcing

37:59

me? But Imagine if we owned Twitter and someone

38:02

to anyone came to us and

38:04

said we will give you a

38:06

billion dollars which

38:08

is one forty fourth of what the company apparently worth.

38:11

And in exchange, you don't

38:13

have to own another.

38:17

I would I

38:18

would be like, oh,

38:20

wait,

38:21

I don't understand. I

38:25

thought I would pay you for that. It's like one

38:27

of those situations where you're you really have to,

38:29

like, try and pretend like you're

38:31

still negotiating. Right. Right. Yeah.

38:33

Yeah. That is the last time that we

38:36

mention how much we don't wanna own

38:38

Twitter on the podcast.

38:40

Okay. Today.

38:42

today. Look.

38:44

Look. Ten years from now, when when

38:46

Twitter, like, doesn't matter anymore and is

38:48

completely truly irrelevant than I would have.

38:51

That's when Hank and John snapped it. I would

38:53

buy it. Yeah. And it's just a sock

38:55

sales platform. That's all it does. Absolutely. There's you're

38:57

only allowed to tweet about the awesome

38:59

socks club. Yeah. There's an auto

39:02

bot that's been

39:04

trained by late

39:06

stage artificial intelligence that if your if

39:09

your tweet is not

39:11

about the importance of

39:14

sock subscription services that generate money for

39:16

charity. Mhmm. It just gets deleted

39:18

instantaneously. What I feel like

39:20

we could already do this with some

39:22

like, already defunct well, like, can we go get ask

39:25

geeves and name it, like, ask

39:28

geeves socks? socks

39:30

jeans. Ask jeans anything about

39:32

the awesome socks jumper. How much

39:34

how much could would it could

39:37

it pass simply cost to buy ask geez right now. Do you know how

39:39

much it cost to buy my space like two

39:41

years ago? It

39:44

was incredible.

39:47

So first off, who do you think owns my space?

39:49

If you had to guess who owns my

39:51

space to go? Isn't it like

39:53

some some like music company owned

39:55

by Justin Timberlake or something weird? Okay. So it was

39:57

first bought by Justin Timberlake for

39:59

thirty five

40:02

million dollars. And then in

40:04

twenty sixteen, it was sold to

40:06

Time Time Inc. for

40:08

eighty seven million dollars. Now I know

40:10

you're wondering, hey. What? Oh my know

40:12

what happened to myspace between twenty eleven and twenty

40:15

sixteen that made it worth

40:17

twice as much money. And

40:19

the answer is nothing.

40:22

That's horrifying. And then

40:24

eventually, time was bought by

40:26

another media corporation and then spun

40:30

off to a holding company that then sold it to

40:32

a related holding company. And so

40:34

we don't know how much it's worth today.

40:36

But the fact that In twenty

40:39

sixteen, it was purportedly worth eighty seven million dollars

40:41

is is is a shocker.

40:43

Oh, boy. I mean, it's

40:45

it's here. It's hanging

40:48

out. What year can we buy my space

40:50

for less than a thousand

40:52

dollars? Less than, I mean,

40:54

because of inflation, probably

40:56

never.

40:58

Maybe in twenty maybe in

40:59

twenty two hundred, you know,

41:01

when after

41:02

I collapse. Oh,

41:03

it'll be worth it. I won't

41:05

be meaningful then. I

41:08

love the idea of Hank and John crawling out of the rubble --

41:10

Yeah. -- at the age of seventy eight,

41:12

you know,

41:13

postapocalyptic.

41:14

But it's like I just

41:16

wanna I just wanna keep goofing. Hey. Let's Let's get my space and

41:19

name it my socks. The first

41:21

thing that

41:22

we do

41:24

is we connect one computer to another computer to

41:26

make what is technically an Internet. And

41:28

then the first thing we do on this

41:32

new Internet is register inside of this new

41:34

Internet, a web domain,

41:36

myspace dot com, which

41:38

redirects to the awesome socks

41:40

dot com. Look.

41:42

There's

41:46

always there's always another cruise. God, I want

41:48

our third act to be so

41:50

weird. That's my biggest

41:52

ambition. Like, we've had a great -- Yeah. -- we've

41:54

had a wonderful career.

41:56

It's been

41:56

beautiful. But the only thing

41:58

it hasn't been

41:59

yet as weird as we set out for it to

42:02

be. Haven't been truly,

42:05

really truly peer goofs. Right. We

42:07

have well, we we haven't you know,

42:09

we haven't adequately committed to some of the goops.

42:11

Like -- Yeah. -- there's a there's a world where

42:13

our third act is literally

42:16

running racks. It's not like

42:18

we go to Iraq. It's it's it's

42:20

like, what would it take instead of

42:22

visiting Iraq's back?

42:25

We we just side to call mister Beast and

42:27

say, listen, have we got an idea for

42:30

you? It's like mister Beast

42:32

Burger, but it's about

42:34

my childhood. I

42:36

don't know if you've read Gatsby, mister Rees, but

42:38

you can go back to

42:41

the past. And we are

42:43

going to get in our little rowboats, and we

42:45

are gonna be just row and row and

42:47

row until we can get back to racks

42:49

in nineteen eighty seven in

42:51

Orlando, Florida. Can make this happen for us. And he'd be

42:53

like, yes. With with point zero five

42:56

percent of my net worth, I can buy

42:58

every racks.

43:00

because I'm I am now Jimmy President of America,

43:02

richest man in the universe.

43:06

Yes.

43:07

And we'll be like, thank you

43:09

god, King Jimmy.

43:12

ha ha It

43:15

does seem to be what

43:17

the arrow's pointing. And then and then

43:19

on our and then on our way

43:21

out, we will ceremoniously bow to the corpse

43:24

of Elon Musk in

43:26

the Antichamber. Right. God

43:28

god king Jimmy's office. and

43:32

then we will retire

43:34

happily to Racks Management.

43:37

Right. Yes. But in order to leave the

43:39

anti chamber, you do have to walk past

43:42

eight million roosters.

43:46

And they're all

43:48

very loud. The only way the only way to, like, ask a

43:50

question directly of god king Jimmy

43:52

-- Mhmm. -- is

43:54

to run a roost

43:56

course where you have to run --

43:58

Right. -- through eight million

43:59

roosters and anyone who can make it

44:02

to the door gets to ask

44:04

for one thing. And most people

44:06

ask for a billion dollars or they

44:08

ask to live forever. They ask for a

44:10

beautiful spouse. And we ask

44:12

for six racks. But

44:14

if you don't

44:17

make it, the

44:19

roosters are very hungry. Well, they

44:21

haven't eaten in years, anything other than human flesh.

44:24

No. It's a very

44:26

spooky episode, Dear Hank's God.

44:28

It's Halloween.

44:30

This is my favorite one we've

44:34

ever done. Alright.

44:38

Before we get to the

44:40

all on board news from Barnes and Noble, I have

44:42

no idea how long we've been recording. I have

44:44

no idea what's happening. Yeah. I tried to look up at how long been recording the

44:47

podcast, but unfortunately, you've hung up on me so

44:49

many times. I have no idea.

44:52

time to move on to first because

44:54

I have good news. So

44:56

I went to AFC Wimbledon's

45:00

game. I got to see Plow Lane. My kids got to

45:02

see Plow Lane. It was incredible. It

45:04

was I mean, the fact, it's

45:06

an amazing stadium. It

45:10

really is. like especially compared to king's meadow.

45:12

It's just incredible what

45:14

has been built.

45:15

It is a

45:18

world class stadium. It seats nine thousand people. It was packed.

45:20

It was packed. It was packed.

45:22

It was a sellout.

45:24

And and

45:26

and it it was just

45:28

an awesome experience. Going to the pub was

45:30

amazing. The food was

45:33

really really good It was just

45:36

awesome. Awesome. Awesome. I

45:38

cannot if you live in London

45:40

or go to London, I I really

45:42

recommend going a plow lane. You'll have a great time.

45:44

Tell people that you're a nerd fighter, and

45:47

you'll have an awesome time.

45:49

We lost that game. We lost one

45:52

nil. We we played

45:54

horribly. It was terrible.

45:56

Alice just yesterday,

45:59

Alice and I went to

45:59

see the our local college,

46:02

Butler, their women's soccer team

46:04

play. And afterwards, I

46:06

was like, does that compare to the AFC

46:08

Wimbledon game? And Alice said, oh, those girls are much better. And

46:11

they certainly keep it on

46:13

the ground more. It it

46:15

it was it it it was not a good performance

46:18

is what I'll say. Mhmm. Even

46:20

so at the end of the game, at the end

46:22

of the AF two woman game,

46:24

and, like, getting to see Paul Lane and knowing that, you

46:26

know, those players had signed her

46:28

birthday cards since she was two years old,

46:30

Alice Lickedaban. She said that

46:32

was amazing.

46:34

and it really was. But

46:35

unfortunately, we lost. And however,

46:37

our next game, we

46:40

won. It was a

46:42

big day it

46:43

was a big game against Rockdale or possibly

46:45

Roachdale. Nobody knows for sure.

46:47

And they're at the bottom of the table. We're

46:49

a little closer to the bottom of the table than I

46:52

would like. for the fourth tier English Mhmm. really

46:54

needed to win that game, and we won two

46:56

won goals from Ouzhou and

46:58

James Davidson and looked

47:00

pretty good.

47:02

I mean, not great, but

47:04

looked steadier.

47:05

So Well, when you

47:08

weren't here,

47:08

John, we had Mark Watson

47:12

on. And and he's a big follower of a

47:14

not great football club.

47:16

Mhmm. That is, I think, a tier

47:18

or two ahead of AFU Wimbledon.

47:21

Sure. But but he looked at he looked at

47:23

your situation. He was like, oh, they're they're doing

47:26

great. That's great. They're

47:28

fine. Yeah. That's

47:30

how he felt I'm glad that he feels that way.

47:32

It it is critically

47:33

important not to get relegated out of

47:36

league too. because

47:37

there's only two delegation spots. It's so hard

47:40

to get back up. It's the bottom

47:42

tier of

47:44

professional football. like full time professional football. So like, it's really,

47:46

really important. So I I'm

47:48

sympathetic to Wimbledon fans who

47:50

are really,

47:52

really scared. because -- Mhmm. -- it would be so

47:54

bad. We have a

47:56

lot of debt. It would be really

47:58

bad. So

47:59

-- Yep. I

48:01

agree that we're probably

48:04

fine, but I would rather be

48:06

fine. Yeah.

48:08

Yeah. so in some games. Yeah. It's a tough situation. And III

48:10

think a lot of fans feel like we're

48:12

running up against some of the inherent

48:15

challenges of fan ownership. And

48:17

that's a really interesting, complicated, difficult time.

48:20

For me, fan

48:21

ownership is essential to what AFC

48:24

Wimbledon is. but that's

48:26

also easy for me to say

48:28

when, you know, I don't have

48:30

to go watch us lose

48:32

every week. Yep.

48:33

What's the news from Mars? Well, NASA wants

48:35

to save

48:36

money by crashing into Mars

48:40

The idea -- Oh. -- involves a device called Shield,

48:42

which stands for a simplified

48:44

high impact energy landing

48:48

device. It looks like a collapsible upside down pyramid,

48:50

it would absorb the energy from a hard

48:52

impact on Mars. And

48:55

if shield works, It would make landing on Mars

48:57

way cheaper, possibly open up a a bunch of landing

48:59

sites for future missions. The idea is

49:02

that you land your craft on Mars

49:04

by just crashing it into

49:06

Mars. Now it's not gonna

49:08

work for a number of different kinds

49:10

of things, but for

49:12

some, maybe it will. The design is based

49:14

on NASA's Mars sample return

49:16

campaign, which involves future

49:18

spacecraft crash landing on

49:20

Earth with samples from Mars.

49:22

Scientists want to see if they could use the same idea,

49:24

but in reverse with a shield

49:26

system that would protect all the

49:28

necessary electronics during landing. And they

49:30

tested a full size prototype

49:32

made out of

49:34

metal rings set up in an inverted pyramid shape by taking it

49:36

out to a ninety foot drop tower that

49:38

has a launch system that can send things to the

49:40

ground at the same speed that they would hit

49:42

Mars at which is around a hundred

49:44

and ten miles per hour because

49:46

of atmospheric drag slowing it

49:48

down from the initial speed of

49:50

forty fourteen thousand miles

49:52

per hour. and they use the drop tower to launch

49:54

into a two inch thick steel plate

49:56

just to put it through conditions that

49:58

would be harder than crashing on actual Mars,

50:00

which is softer than a steel plate. And it worked

50:03

using a high side camera. Scientists were

50:05

able to see that the impact.

50:07

It hit the shield at a slight

50:09

angle. It bounced three and a half feet into the air, and

50:11

then it flipped over. The bounce was probably caused by

50:13

the steel plate it didn't happen in other tests that

50:16

used dirt instead of a steel plate.

50:18

Importantly, shield was able to

50:20

protect the electronic devices

50:22

onboard the prototype, including

50:24

a smartphone. So if your if

50:26

your iPhone can survive it,

50:28

then Mars probe can survive it too. Wow.

50:31

wow So we're just gonna

50:33

crash stuff onto

50:34

Mars. No no need to worry about landing.

50:38

It's it's save so much weight and so

50:40

much worry if you could

50:42

just just hit it like a

50:44

bullet.

50:45

Wow. that's

50:46

fascinating. It is. So it would it would be a way to

50:49

get rid of the parachute, get rid

50:51

of the, you know, all

50:54

the pro rockets. Get rid of all the, like, sequence of which

50:56

is a lot of the -- Yeah. -- a lot of the weight. So

50:58

a lot of the weight, it's also a lot of the worry

51:01

and it's a lot of the engineering that you

51:03

need to do. Yeah.

51:05

Cool. Yeah.

51:06

It's awesome.

51:07

NASA blows my mind. NASA's

51:09

pretty great. Well, Hank, thank you for podding with

51:11

me. Thanks to everybody for listening and for your

51:14

questions. You can email us questions at dear Hank and

51:16

John, and of course, Most of

51:18

all, thank you to our god kings,

51:20

whoever they may currently be

51:22

for their grace and and

51:24

beneficence. Or in the future, also for

51:27

future God Kings. We also

51:29

appreciate you. We love you and

51:31

all we ask God Kings

51:33

of the Future is I

51:35

just wanna be able to sell my socks. Just

51:37

let me sell my socks. It's all

51:39

I wanna do anymore. I I

51:42

don't need to do that. III

51:44

or golf. God. Hang on. What?

51:46

Golf. I I wanna apologize

51:48

to the future God queen.

51:50

for speaking of God Kings. Yeah. You we we got

51:53

to never really got ourselves in a lot of trouble

51:55

here, didn't we? Massive mistake. I guess he's

51:57

gonna send us

51:59

she's gonna send this to Iceland.

52:02

Hooray. This

52:03

snakes. No, John. We're ending up we're gonna be

52:05

on the moon with the vice presidents and you know

52:07

it. Oh, god. that's

52:10

truly my wife's back up. Just

52:12

living on the moon with Dan Quail. This

52:14

is as close to hell as I

52:18

can

52:18

imagine. Oh,

52:20

it's an honor God queen. I'll

52:22

be on the moon for you. Thank you.

52:24

Thank you for thank

52:27

you for not rating my head from my body. This podcast

52:29

is edited by Joseph Toonamedis. It's produced by Rosiana

52:32

Holzrowhas. Our communications coordinator

52:34

is Brook

52:36

Schottwell, all of these people are really they

52:38

have to they have to

52:40

deal with our

52:43

I'm grateful to them. We have to deal

52:45

with our BS and we're very grateful to

52:47

them. Yes. Don't curse Hank.

52:50

Thanks. That creates more work for tune outs through. An

52:52

editorial assistant is to bookie truck or party. The

52:54

music you're hearing now and at the beginning of the podcast is by

52:56

the great Motorola,

52:58

and that's they say in our hometown. Don't forget to be

53:00

at all.