0:00

Bajo High and Pascal

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Leclaire. I hope

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you'd like to support my teaching, you

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Your. Support is greatly appreciated.

0:22

Nixie. There

0:45

is a yet

0:47

another aspect of

0:50

experience that. In

0:53

meditation we can become man.

0:56

Intrigued by interested in

0:59

explore. And

1:01

it's a little bit more

1:03

subtle in the way or

1:06

the progression of the instructions.

1:08

And this classic a form.

1:12

And then. You

1:14

know, when did. The unfolding

1:16

of the retreat. It was stuck

1:18

with the body. It's within bit.

1:20

warm, girls palpable. literally. Then

1:24

we go towards emotions which

1:26

are sometimes very palpable mind

1:28

states, sometimes what's more subtle,

1:31

harder to. Recognize.

1:36

And then the ceiling tone the pleasure

1:38

of better. Also is you know it's

1:41

not as obvious as. You

1:43

know, step or it may be in in

1:46

breath. Or tingling. It's part

1:48

of it, sometimes. very

1:50

obvious enough. inaccurate. Total.

1:53

on the table leg

1:56

in north might be

1:58

clear i'm But

2:02

still in the progression of the instructions

2:04

we find, we

2:06

even went as far

2:08

as studying, and

2:11

still do, still we will

2:13

today, studying, exploring thoughts that

2:16

can be so deductive,

2:19

so enticing,

2:21

so charming.

2:29

And there are a few

2:31

more aspects of experience

2:35

that if we had more time we could try

2:38

to unpack or highlight

2:41

a bit. But today just

2:48

to continue the exploration, and it

2:50

doesn't have to, there's plenty.

2:54

There's a whole body, there's

2:57

a whole full meal here, with

2:59

the body, the breath, emotions,

3:01

plenty. And then thoughts,

3:04

feeling tone. And yet if we

3:06

want to, if we're curious about, if the

3:08

conditions are right, there is

3:10

some quietness, some curiosity about

3:12

this. It

3:15

could be interesting to explore

3:18

what is called consciousness.

3:22

So the knowing. Not

3:25

the tingling, but what knows it.

3:28

Not the breath, but what knows it. Not

3:30

the emotion, but what knows it. Not

3:33

the pleasantness or unpleasantness, but

3:35

what knows it. It

3:37

has even less features than all the rest.

3:41

And it's important that it doesn't have so

3:43

many features, because imagine it

3:45

had a weight, a color, a

3:48

shape. It couldn't

3:50

reveal a sound. It

3:53

couldn't reveal an emotion. It

3:56

has to be pretty transparent in

3:59

order to... give all the space

4:01

to the tingling or

4:03

the in-breath or the out-breath. Do

4:05

you follow me? So

4:08

the knowing, that's all

4:10

it does. It reveals,

4:12

it could be a verb

4:14

that could be used, it reveals something.

4:17

When there's consciousness, something is

4:19

revealed, is experienced. You

4:26

know, like when a typical experience

4:28

would be, you would be doing the

4:30

walking meditation, and I'm getting

4:33

good at this. Imagine

4:43

if I was not conscious of it. It would

4:45

be messy, no? Consciousness

4:48

is a good thing, it's a good

4:50

thing when we're conscious of something, conscious

4:52

of our body and space, conscious of

4:54

the impact of what we're doing, conscious

4:57

of our emotions. No, I don't love you, I

4:59

don't want, I think you're mine. No,

5:01

I don't. Somebody

5:04

is going to have to be conscious of

5:06

your emotions. So

5:11

a typical experience,

5:13

maybe you'll be

5:15

walking or I'll be walking

5:17

somewhere for 10 minutes, and

5:20

suddenly something appears. It was there the whole time,

5:22

but I was not conscious of it. Like

5:27

one time I was walking, I think yesterday, I

5:30

might have walked back and forth, I thought

5:32

there was some little piece of wood,

5:35

you know, and at some

5:37

point I stopped and looked at the,

5:39

it was kind of in the field,

5:41

but very kind

5:44

of generic piece of wood. And

5:47

suddenly I stopped, it was actually the

5:50

head of a chipmunk that

5:52

was... Watching you

5:54

ever walk. And

5:57

he was like this. And

6:04

I was

6:07

like, oh, that's the head of the chipmunk,

6:09

you know, like suddenly I

6:12

become conscious of it. It

6:14

reveals something, consciousness reveals a

6:17

sound, reveals coldness or

6:19

warmth reveals and

6:21

make it known, it's cognizing, it's

6:25

registering or experiencing

6:28

feeling something. And

6:32

the words could be misleading,

6:35

consciousness, because it makes

6:37

it a thing, consciousness.

6:43

You know, it's a thing and in

6:45

our exploration we might find that it's

6:48

something dynamic, maybe

6:51

more of a verb, an activity, bringing

6:55

to consciousness, bringing, it's constantly

6:58

emerging, constantly, yeah,

7:03

emerging might be a word. Or

7:06

flickering could be a very like

7:08

consciousness flickering, asleep,

7:11

unconscious, conscious, becoming

7:14

conscious. And

7:16

so it's something very

7:18

changing actually that talks about it

7:22

in terms of six, consciousness.

7:26

Just to break it, always, always

7:29

ready to deconstruct, always ready

7:32

to shove things

7:34

in pieces, always

7:37

ready to cut through

7:39

ignorance, to solidify, to

7:41

make permanent and to make mine

7:46

also. Ask God, don't go there, don't

7:49

tell me it's not me. I see you

7:51

coming, you

7:55

know, you've done it with everything else. Don't,

7:58

just don't. Well,

8:01

I will. So that activity

8:03

of consciousness, see how you

8:06

feel when you hear this,

8:09

the activity of consciousness, the

8:12

mystified, makes

8:14

it less solid, sacred,

8:17

more annual. The

8:19

activity of consciousness. The

8:21

Buddha is the person who is the person

8:23

who has sex consciousness. Hearing

8:26

consciousness, sensing

8:28

consciousness, feeling

8:31

consciousness, smelling

8:33

consciousness, seeing consciousness, and

8:37

thinking, or mind consciousness, so

8:39

the experiences,

8:42

an idea, a memory,

8:45

a sight, like a visual,

8:48

an image. And

8:51

he uses that approach,

8:54

the approach of the six kinds of consciousness,

8:56

to help us deconstruct that. Again,

8:59

be stuck with me for the rest of my life, or

9:01

have you seen me? It's all about me. To

9:06

say, like, actually, honey pie, maybe

9:08

not. Maybe it's just an impermanent

9:11

event. And

9:13

we tend to see things as,

9:16

I'm the subject, and things are

9:18

the object, they're out there, and

9:20

I'm here, and there's a clear

9:23

separation. That's just a

9:25

point of view, that's just a take,

9:28

that's just an interpretation. Maybe it doesn't

9:30

hold in an absolute way. Maybe it's

9:32

not absent like this, maybe it's just

9:34

the way it appears in

9:37

an untrained mind. And

9:40

so, for example, here, the bell

9:44

consciousness, bell

9:46

consciousness, do you

9:48

think it needs the bell, or it doesn't need

9:51

the bell? The sound of

9:53

the bell consciousness, being conscious of

9:55

the bell sounding. It

10:00

co-arises with the bell. The

10:04

consciousness of the sound depends on

10:07

the sound. It's co-arising with the

10:09

sound and with the sound dying,

10:12

the consciousness of the sound dies.

10:14

Let's see if it's true. So,

10:54

we live much closer to death than we

10:56

think because it's happening all the

10:58

time. There's the death

11:01

of that moment of feeling

11:04

the step, consciousness of stepping. That

11:07

dies. And that dies. And

11:09

here we have the chance to come very

11:12

close to death and then de-arise ourselves

11:14

with that. Because

11:16

it's happening all the time. The

11:19

consciousness of an idea, of

11:21

an emotion. And

11:25

that the whole, you know, where

11:28

is the sound that woke up this morning

11:30

in the bed? As

11:34

inexistent as the big bad. It

11:37

just doesn't exist. Through

11:39

story telling, we could, yes, I

11:41

was there, I'm going there, I'll

11:44

be there, will I get there? Oh my

11:46

God, I'm scared. In

11:49

the meantime, you know, it all

11:51

vanished. Unless we exert a lot of

11:53

effort telling the story. others

12:00

of the story and they tell you

12:02

another story, they are like, no, you are not like this, this is

12:04

not what happened. I

12:07

am going to force feed you my story,

12:09

you are going to have to believe it. While

12:15

things are appearing and disappearing and

12:18

so that is to cut through maybe, this

12:20

is just talk, it cannot

12:23

go very far, it dies as

12:25

soon as I am finished talking. Then

12:28

we go back to what we have trained,

12:30

what we perceive and the view

12:32

we have identified.

12:48

As opposed to the

12:50

story line, the awareness

12:52

of the birth and

12:54

death of moments of

12:57

consciousness and the

12:59

not so solid self

13:01

as we know. That

13:03

is the job of concept, the job

13:06

of concept is to solidify.

13:09

So when there is the concept, me aggregates

13:11

a number of things, the

13:14

picture of me with

13:17

the birthday cake one,

13:19

it brings a

13:21

load of different things and it

13:23

chooses a bunch of things and put it together

13:26

and this is the concept me. If

13:28

I have the concept me, good person, if

13:30

somebody says no, you also

13:32

equals being cheap the other day. And

13:35

you are like, no, no, the concept me is just a

13:37

good person, I want to keep it like this, please don't

13:39

do that to me. The concept

13:42

me is I am trying to keep it

13:44

together, all these different memories that are good,

13:46

memories of me, good person. And

13:49

somebody is like, well, if you are going to play

13:51

with that me, put that in also. No,

13:56

I don't remember what happened. And

14:04

so a concept is just bringing something,

14:06

like the retreat. Where's the retreat? It

14:08

doesn't exist. Where's the beginning

14:10

of the retreat? It doesn't exist. But

14:12

the concept has some usefulness. You say, what

14:15

I call retreat, I don't know, did it

14:17

start at home when you got in the

14:19

car? Or did it start

14:21

in the parking lot? Or when you met

14:23

Bibiana at the table? Where's

14:25

the... What's

14:28

me? And physically,

14:30

is it when

14:33

the food is in my mouth, is that me? Or

14:36

it has to be digested a little bit? Become

14:38

me. When is

14:40

the moment where me starts?

14:44

It's conceptual, we will say, but don't get

14:47

so specific, please. I'm

14:51

not questioning things. Well,

14:54

that's actually what the Buddha does. Not

14:56

doing it intellectually, concept

14:59

and thinking, but we have the

15:01

chance to actually go on the field. And see, what

15:04

is that observer, that witness?

15:07

Does that even exist? That's

15:13

why I was suggesting yesterday that one entry

15:15

point could be, of course there has

15:18

to be curiosity. We

15:20

have to be interested in that, in bringing that thing. And

15:22

there has to be co-opposing. To

15:25

actually go and explain it. So

15:29

the sound appears and

15:31

the sound is known. And the

15:33

witness might feel very strange to say like that's me

15:36

hearing. Like hearing happens, I

15:38

don't decide it, I don't control it. There's

15:42

another thing that I

15:44

find interesting. So

15:47

it's a whole other field. You

15:51

might play with this

15:53

a little bit. There's

15:57

another activity we didn't get to, we won't

15:59

get to. or we are getting to it

16:01

now. But we won't

16:03

give it its all day. But there's

16:05

another thing that is constantly happening. So

16:08

the body is constantly happening. There's

16:10

always something physical in your human

16:13

being. And there's

16:15

also always perception that is happening.

16:17

So there's sigh, there's hearing. But

16:19

there's always something that organizes the world. It

16:21

keeps going. So if you look

16:24

around with your eyes, you don't have to

16:26

do anything. It organizes

16:28

the world. It will recognize

16:30

window, column, lamp. You

16:33

don't have to exert a kind of

16:35

a self, like, okay, we have to

16:37

recognize things now. It's

16:40

just a thing that happens by itself. You

16:43

look around and it organizes things unless

16:45

it doesn't recognize it. Then it's

16:47

like, what is that? But

16:50

otherwise it gives meaning to things.

16:53

You look down, you don't

16:55

have to exert anything. So

16:57

perception is a kind of

16:59

a river that is always alive in human beings.

17:02

It organizes the world all the time. There's

17:05

nothing personal about it. There's nothing high

17:07

about it. It's just something that

17:09

happens. If I

17:11

look there, it recognizes glass of water.

17:15

It's just what it does. And

17:17

so if we pay attention to this,

17:20

we'll notice that. It's funny

17:22

that I think of it as mind. It's

17:25

something that happens. It has

17:28

its own life. So

17:30

does the body. I don't have to. We'll let

17:32

it. It's just there is

17:34

a body. And consciousness is

17:36

the same thing. Something appears in

17:39

consciousness. Or somebody says, hey,

17:41

look, it's conditional. Somebody

17:43

said, hey, look, there's looking.

17:46

And consciousness appears. And

17:49

so in the practice, over time,

17:53

we'll... It's like an important thing

17:55

to do, to question this. Where

17:58

is this eye that makes you feel? You

18:01

heard and take things personally and

18:03

wonder why the universe is against

18:05

the new boots and all this

18:07

and or any form it takes

18:09

is a know when they're suddenly

18:11

generosity and like entrepreneurs. Onto this

18:13

I hope this other than generous

18:16

it's generous is minutes me and

18:18

know when generous it is something

18:20

that is natural happen in the

18:22

universe. the don't have to make

18:24

it much better you make this

18:26

might. Be them. Can

18:33

convey be. And

18:35

money. And

18:41

an actor. But

18:44

if I only. Then

18:47

the sphere will people little.

18:50

The would they be able to recognize.

18:53

And will I lose? it? Something

18:58

like this. So did

19:00

the problem of owning. Of

19:03

appropriation. Concern.

19:06

With an important thing to consider.

19:09

And the last

19:11

hide out of

19:13

identification appropriation. To

19:17

be conscious that activity.

19:20

Okay maybe the past I can see

19:22

in one as a suggestion from my

19:25

just as as if you want to

19:27

study this when we to question this.

19:30

Is to have listened and

19:33

be were found in notice

19:35

how it happens with very

19:37

naturally that sounds heard. It. Can

19:40

you could do this also with thought the

19:42

beginning of thought he did this little bit

19:44

is to they. Can

19:47

secure and just. Beware.

19:50

of the beginning of pants ill notice

19:52

the beginning of cops isn't so much

19:55

i the.com live in a fit and

19:57

say what it says And

20:00

then, if my attention is

20:02

superficial, I think I'm hearing, I'm thinking,

20:04

and it's important,

20:09

it's useful in life, you know, to say,

20:11

yeah, I said that, but you said that,

20:14

I feel that, I have this discernment. But on

20:17

a more subtle level, it's not exactly like

20:19

this. So

20:23

one way to explore this is to

20:25

check the beginning of thoughts, to

20:28

see how they just come in like

20:30

this. It could be also

20:32

with science, you know, the eyes are open and

20:34

they're happy, the light is

20:37

going to happen. It might make

20:39

it very personal, but it tries

20:41

to happen, it

20:43

just does not matter what it does,

20:46

it registers what it says. And

20:48

the name sort of recognizes, organizes

20:50

the world. All these things

20:52

happen by themselves. So

21:04

that's something we can play with a

21:06

little bit, maybe today, be

21:08

interested in that activity

21:11

of consciousness. And

21:15

to me sometimes, what I like to do,

21:17

while sitting, maybe you're standing in the

21:22

walk, maybe when I walk and I get to the

21:24

end of the walk, and

21:26

just question, where is I? Where

21:28

is I? And it's

21:31

really interesting, sometimes it feels like, oh yeah,

21:33

I am here, let's do this,

21:38

be a sensation. It's a whole

21:41

relationship. We're working

21:43

on our relationship. And

21:46

so it feels sometimes, oh yeah,

21:48

I, it's so interesting, I is

21:50

from here, kind of here, vaguely

21:52

to here, and down,

21:54

it's sensations. It's just

21:56

sensations. And so when I

21:58

feel here, then I'm like, oh, I'm here. okay,

22:01

so it would be here too. No, here is

22:03

just sensation. And at some point it

22:05

feels like it's just here behind the eyes. And

22:08

then when I pay attention to

22:10

this area, no, this is

22:12

just sensation. It's like a kind of something,

22:15

you know. And everywhere I look where it

22:18

seems to be, when I look a little

22:20

closer, it's like, no, it's really, there's

22:22

eye mixtures today, I'm a

22:24

little anxious, you know, I feel it in

22:26

the chest. Not today, but it happened. Not

22:29

now, but and I'm like, oh, I'm

22:31

anxious, I'm anxious. Okay, so

22:33

this is me. No,

22:35

this is just sensation. It's not me. So

22:41

worth looking at, because

22:43

imagine the freedom when there's

22:46

an emotion, and it's not you,

22:48

it's an emotion that is there. You

22:51

know, it's not, if it's mine, I'm stuck with it,

22:53

I have to do something about it. But if it's

22:55

there is a fear that is

22:58

present, there is. I remember

23:02

when I was a young adult, I

23:04

was with a friend in a car,

23:08

a new old car. And

23:11

we had a little accident, very small,

23:14

we just, you know, there was

23:16

a nobody was hurt, there was not

23:18

much to it. And there was definitely like, you

23:23

know, the car was hurt.

23:28

And I remember, and

23:31

right after that, bang, you

23:33

know, it was very small, you know,

23:35

we were just like moving after stuff,

23:37

you know, and be up something like

23:39

this, there was almost no speed, bang.

23:43

And I remember she, she got

23:46

really upset, you know, and she was and

23:48

there was a lot of emotion. And I

23:50

was sitting next to her. And

23:52

I was thinking, is that

23:54

my car? I would

23:56

feel exactly like this if it was my car. But

23:59

so strange, it's not my car, so I

24:01

find it kind of funny, or... You

24:04

know, like, it doesn't mean much,

24:06

you know, like, we're both okay,

24:09

and, you know, it's just material stuff.

24:11

Like, I didn't have much of a reaction,

24:13

but I remember being like, I'm sure if

24:15

it was my car, I would

24:17

be somewhat like she is now, like, oh my

24:20

God, oh my God, you know, all this,

24:23

but... And I was like, wow, that life is

24:25

so interesting, like, it doesn't mean

24:27

much. I don't make it personal, it's

24:29

not my God. And

24:32

there are a few times in life I've seen this,

24:34

and like, somebody tells me, like,

24:36

how if somebody stole my bike, stole

24:38

my bike, and I'm like, didn't I... I

24:42

couldn't care less, I mean, I care about

24:44

their thing, but it doesn't, like, it doesn't

24:46

make my... I'm not

24:48

like they are, and I can see if it

24:50

was the opposite, if it was my bike, I

24:53

would feel like that, you know. So strange.

24:57

Well, spiritual life is... Partly

25:00

this, you know, to go see, like, why do

25:02

I make this personal? Why

25:04

do I make this about a certain me? It's

25:07

worth questioning that certain me, because a

25:11

lot of our trouble is

25:13

related to this. So the

25:15

deconstruction that we do in meditation

25:18

is the same. Is that really

25:20

my thought? Is that really

25:22

my emotion? Not mine.

25:25

Maybe we'll discover it, not mine. It's there.

25:28

But it's not exactly mine. It's

25:30

not somebody else either. It's

25:32

there. So let's take care of it, you

25:34

know. But it might not mean... This,

25:37

we can't force... Okay, I'm not going

25:39

to take anything personal anymore. Finished. I

25:41

heard Pascal. This is the way of

25:44

wisdom. It doesn't

25:46

work like this, unfortunately. That

25:48

you has been ingrained, you know,

25:50

it started early. Your nose, mama's

25:52

nose, your nose. My mouth is looking at

25:54

it like, what is she saying? I saw it

25:56

like... Awesome. What

25:59

is she saying? mind, she was like, what

26:01

is she doing? It's so confusing. It's okay,

26:03

okay, it's mine, it's yours. And

26:06

at some point you're like, okay, I get it,

26:08

it's mine, okay, it's mine then. But

26:12

at the beginning it's just like, what

26:14

is she talking about? You know, I

26:16

know this, my nose. Why is she

26:19

so focused on that? We're having a

26:21

great time here. So

26:25

we learned this, and it's important that we've

26:27

learned it, you know. For many reasons it's

26:29

really important. And now because we're

26:31

on the other side, you know, going more towards

26:33

death. You

26:36

know, it's good to start to question, like,

26:38

was it really mine? It

26:41

was made up, we created that

26:43

meaning, it was useful in many ways.

26:47

And it has its limits. Yeah,

26:51

there's danger to it, there's

26:53

gratification to it. It's mine, I

26:55

did it, I succeeded. There's real

26:57

gratification to it, but there's also

26:59

a disadvantage, it's called death. You

27:03

know, if you're identified,

27:05

it's going to hurt. Okay.

27:10

Pascal, you

27:12

really got to get serious about all this stuff. Okay,

27:18

should we play with this? A little bit? And

27:24

that might be of interest to you, and that

27:26

might not be of interest to you. And

27:30

that's totally okay. But

27:37

because it is part of the path,

27:39

this is important to name it. And

27:50

when we use noting, for example,

27:52

it's a way that in labelling

27:55

noting, that technique, you could say

27:57

in meditation, It's

28:00

implying a lot around us because we never

28:02

say I in no thing. I hear a

28:04

sound. We say, we'll say,

28:07

ah, there

28:09

is a body. There's a body.

28:11

The body is sensitive. It's alive. There's

28:15

lots of fear here. There's

28:17

some quietness. You see,

28:19

there's no I. We remove the I. It's

28:21

very gently, we remove it. We'll

28:25

say sentences like, knowing

28:28

is happening. The breath is

28:30

known. Oh yeah, the breath

28:32

is known. Sounds

28:35

are heard. Very

28:37

factual. It's true. Sounds are heard.

28:39

Here they are. The

28:43

body is breathing. We

28:48

might at some point discover that there is irritation.

28:51

Oh, there is irritation if there is.

28:54

Or there is amusement. Our

28:58

kindness. Is kindness present? Could

29:02

it be invited? We

29:13

release some of the grasping,

29:16

clinging, gripping. We

29:20

recognize nature, the nature of things. Human

29:24

nature. How? Nature.

29:41

If it appears, it would be very natural

29:43

that it would appear like, no, it's me.

29:46

Fine. Then just be aware

29:48

of this. We don't have to get rid of that. But

29:51

Get curious about it. Many

30:01

of us we think canvas and thing

30:03

called consciousness and it. Resides

30:07

from the behind

30:09

That eyes. It's

30:13

located epicenter. That of

30:15

I is beyond the

30:17

eyes. That's

30:20

the case. It feels like this,

30:22

this this and assess. Crash.

30:28

Then we can just become aware of this kind of. this

30:30

is how it is right now. And

30:47

as we pay attention, we might see fluctuations

30:49

in the. Perception.

30:53

Might. Go From: I'm Breathing. It

30:55

appears like I'm breathing. Maybe

30:58

later. Didn't appear like. Breathing

31:01

is happening. Sometimes

31:16

there's a lot of starts in

31:19

there at things to be sad.

31:24

And sometimes very little. A.

31:52

Possible that at some point will. Will

31:55

be a recognition of the mood. And

31:58

And the moon. And

32:00

they're more. Detail

32:05

and moon. Quiet

32:08

know, Thank

34:00

you. Thank

34:30

you. Thank

35:00

you. Thank

35:30

you. Thank

36:00

you. Thank

36:30

you. Thank

37:00

you. Thank

37:29

you. Thank

37:59

you. Thank you. Thank

38:30

you. Thank

39:00

you. Thank

39:30

you. Thank

40:00

you. Thank

40:30

you. Thank

41:00

you. Thank

41:30

you. Thank

42:00

you. Thank

42:30

you. Thank

43:00

you. Thank

43:30

you. Thank

44:00

you. Thank

44:30

you. Thank

45:00

you. Thank

45:30

you. I

46:04

talk about this in a kind of bubbly way.

46:09

It is very deep

46:11

teaching, very deep

46:13

subtle investigation, very

46:17

refined stuff

46:20

and very counterintuitive.

46:23

It is like we talk about

46:26

benevolence, like it makes sense.

46:30

Then when we question the self, it

46:33

might be the most kind of

46:35

horrid or surprising

46:38

or confronting.

46:41

We don't. As

46:44

if there was a suggestion that the annihilation

46:48

is just around the corner. I

46:52

don't exist or something like this. It is just

46:54

we are talking about a small little change in

46:58

understanding what is happening at the point of need.

47:01

That can make a big difference in

47:04

terms of stress and suffering

47:07

and worth occurring.

47:11

Something that goes

47:15

against us and

47:17

the fact that there is

47:19

a kind of a circle, a

47:22

spin, you know

47:26

where we weren't taught that.

47:30

And so we learn to perceive things in

47:32

this way, perceiving things in this way. We

47:34

think in this way. We think I am

47:37

breathing, I am hearing, I am

47:39

a path to the day. Because

47:43

we perceive, therefore we think in

47:45

this way, the thinking process is

47:48

based on that perception. That

47:50

perception reinforces the view, which

47:53

makes sure that we are going to perceive it in

47:55

the next moment again. And we

47:57

think in this way. And so in this time we are

47:59

going to see. But I get

48:01

engaged in that. And

48:03

then somebody comes and says, well, maybe not.

48:05

It's like, what are you saying? My

48:08

perception is my sense of it,

48:10

my thoughts. And my view is that.

48:14

But then, as we pay attention, we

48:16

start to poke little holes. And we'll

48:19

find out. Ah, that's why. That's why. I'm

48:21

in my bed at night. And I say,

48:23

why did I say this? Why did I

48:25

say this? It's like exactly you. It

48:28

was the need to be seen, or the need

48:30

to get something, so you were willing

48:33

to reorganize reality a

48:35

little bit. It's

48:38

some life state that did it.

48:46

Yeah, so what's up?

48:49

Question? Yes. Objections also

48:52

are welcome. And?

49:03

Yeah, we can use that language. That's OK.

49:06

I'm not going to cut around

49:09

the conceptual nature of

49:12

that, even

49:14

in present. I

49:18

think it's going

49:21

to be a good time for us to talk. But

49:24

then, who is the kind of person

49:26

who is the person who is

49:29

the person who's the

49:32

possibility that that's

49:34

happening? Yeah. Where

49:36

does the responsibility fit from that? Yeah,

49:39

yeah, yeah. That's the big question. I was

49:41

waiting for it. I thought it would be the second

49:43

question. I

49:46

almost went there, and I thought, let's ask the question. But

49:52

it is the classic, important, very

49:54

important question. So where

49:57

does the responsibility lie? Because

50:00

my understanding of this, they're not exclusive.

50:02

They can go very

50:04

well together, actually extremely well together,

50:06

in the sense that you

50:09

know how Buddhism is talked about as

50:11

the middle path, the

50:13

middle path between extremes. So

50:15

one extreme would be

50:17

irresponsibility. I don't care, these

50:20

things happen, I did

50:22

that, but there's no self, whatever,

50:24

you know, like being irresponsible.

50:26

And it happens a lot in life, it

50:29

doesn't have to be, I'm trying to put this view, but

50:32

you know people say I don't care, these

50:34

happen, get over it, you know. And

50:37

so this is an extreme, it doesn't

50:40

lead to health and good relationships. Another

50:43

extreme would be complete identification.

50:45

It's about me, I said this, it

50:47

means I'm a bad person, I'm a

50:49

bad person solidly forever, I'm never going

50:52

to forgive myself for that. And

50:54

you know, so that's another extreme. What

50:57

we call the middle path here is

50:59

consciousness, being conscious

51:01

of what is in the mood is

51:05

there, you know, because if I'm not conscious, then

51:09

this is what's going to happen.

51:11

It's going to be habits, reactivity,

51:14

and so here we aim for the path

51:16

of consciousness. So we don't put the lens

51:18

of is it mine or not mine, but

51:20

we recognize that when

51:24

it's conscious of their impact

51:26

or what's inside the system

51:28

here, that it's easier to

51:30

choose better. And

51:34

so, yeah, like I'll

51:37

give you an example. When I

51:39

started teaching Sanneh, kind of a

51:41

role of responsibility in the community,

51:44

and somebody came to

51:46

me and said it might still happen,

51:48

but I remember the difference is very striking for

51:50

me. Somebody would come and say,

51:52

like, Pascal, in the class you said that,

51:55

and it hurt me in this way, and I would

51:57

like, how are you? you

52:00

didn't consider me or this or... Anyway,

52:03

they would blame me for something or

52:05

say, name something. And

52:08

if it's true or not, my

52:10

reaction was like, no, not me, like, why, no. No,

52:14

I'm a good person. And I

52:16

could actually not take responsibility because I

52:18

was too identified.

52:21

And with Princess, now somebody would come and

52:23

say, I'm not

52:25

totally immune, but I've seen this enough

52:27

time now that, wow, I've learned something.

52:30

Somebody would say, come and say, this

52:32

is what you said. And

52:35

I'd be calm enough to consider you say,

52:37

yeah. That is a

52:40

lack of consideration. You know, it's...

52:42

I'm so sorry. I can say,

52:44

I said it, but it's not like attached to

52:46

a cell or less, you

52:48

know. And I can say, yeah, that

52:50

was not helpful, I'm so sorry. And

52:54

it's clean. Before, you

52:56

know, if I... Or if I took on the

52:58

responsibility, oh my God, I did that. Then the

53:00

person had to take care of me. I heard

53:02

them, but they take care of me because now

53:04

I'm all like, oh my God, I'm a horrible...

53:06

It's not so bad, but just trying not to do

53:09

it. No, no, I'm never going to forgive myself. Oh

53:11

my God, it's not about him again. So

53:16

removing the eye like this, we can

53:18

recognize, you know. In the

53:20

same way, I remember I

53:22

had done something when I was a young

53:25

adult that was detrimental in

53:27

the workplace. You know, there was a kind

53:30

of a loophole in the union

53:32

thing, you know. And I saw

53:34

it and I was greedy and I was like,

53:36

well, I just have to say here is the

53:38

rule, you know. It was not made for that

53:40

situation. And the

53:43

union was behind me, they were like, yeah, it's in

53:45

the rule, you know. And it was

53:48

not ethical, you know. I was abusing the

53:50

system. But I was greedy.

53:52

And I thought, no, I could get something out

53:54

of it and it's written so well, you know. And

53:57

after, when I got a little, you know, too

53:59

long after... when I saw the impact of that

54:01

trust and this and I was like that was

54:03

not... and then I was guilty of that you

54:05

know like a... and one time I was

54:08

on the retreat and Sylvia

54:10

Borspine said the

54:13

conditions were such... she was talking about

54:15

herself about something else the conditions were

54:17

such that it could not be

54:19

otherwise at that time the conditions

54:21

were such... I heard this and was like

54:23

oh yeah there

54:25

was no understanding of what really has

54:28

value you know kind of honesty, ethics,

54:31

to me what that value was getting and

54:34

so at that time it was not possible for this person

54:36

to... and so it

54:39

didn't remove the responsibility it removed the guilt

54:42

you know I was like yeah oh yeah

54:44

this happened and it really had that impact

54:46

and the kind of discomfort of you

54:48

know the impact on the relationships at

54:51

all you know and it

54:53

was like yeah it really... I didn't... you know

54:55

but it didn't speak about me and

54:57

the horrible person speaks

55:00

about there was not much wisdom

55:02

there was a lot of greed and

55:04

you know this... is

55:17

that helpful? I

55:22

don't think there's a way in there yes that's my...

55:25

I'm a smart guy, oh my God yeah yeah no

55:27

but that's identification we... it's good to...

55:30

to you know... it's something that

55:32

can happen identify with wisdom you

55:35

know but wisdom is of the public domain it's

55:39

accessible actually it's... it's

55:42

conditional if we create a little

55:44

space for it it will emerge

55:46

you know there's conditions that are supportive to

55:48

wisdom and so the point of view

55:50

the Buddhist point of view and this is visit it's

55:52

not about is it yours or not is

55:55

what will make wisdom arise? that's

55:58

what... we are interested in, we

56:01

could say, which seems like

56:03

a good angle. Like

56:05

is it mine, not mine? We could debate

56:07

forever. But what makes it arise?

56:11

Let's see what makes it arise and create

56:13

this condition. So

56:16

it removes this view of mine

56:19

or not mine, and it puts

56:21

the view of conditionality.

56:23

What helps it disappear,

56:25

grieve? What helps generosity

56:28

arise? I

56:31

remember at the teen retreat, I did the

56:33

teen retreats for a number of years. One

56:37

time, one young person said,

56:40

you know Pascal with my friends,

56:43

sometimes I'm so generous and

56:45

I bring people together, and

56:49

sometimes I'm using all kinds

56:51

of language, like

56:53

a horrible person, I can be in my group

56:55

of friends. Which one am I? And

56:58

I said, well, from

57:00

the Buddhist perspective, it's irrelevant, that's

57:03

not the question, we remove

57:05

that lens. And we think,

57:07

why do you think it's helpful? What do

57:10

you want to nourish? What

57:12

do you want to abandon slowly? This

57:16

is what's important, isn't it? Which one are

57:19

you? We're never

57:21

gonna solve that. Bring

57:29

another one. I

57:31

wonder, did you

57:34

ask a question up to now? Maybe not, okay.

57:48

This way, sorry? Liberating. I

58:04

thought you were going to

58:07

say, when it

58:11

comes to others...

58:24

So there is another teaching... Oh

58:28

yes, so the question is, okay,

58:30

it can be liberating when I

58:32

think about here, but if

58:34

I think of somebody else who died, how

58:36

can I honor this life? How

58:40

can I do both? So

58:45

this brings another teaching that

58:48

is related to this. It's actually

58:50

the heart of that. And

58:52

the teachings on this... It's called

58:55

two realities. It's

58:58

actually not two realities, one, but

59:00

it's two different angles on reality.

59:03

So there's one we call conventional and

59:06

one we call absolute. And

59:09

in meditation, Vipassana, we're interested

59:11

in bringing the absolute, coming

59:15

closer to that other view. It's

59:17

like if you say, yes, that's a drop of water,

59:19

but if I put it in the microscope, it's

59:22

something else. That's not my

59:24

field. It's

59:28

a different view, it's a different angle. And

59:31

so we can take the angle of I, mind,

59:33

it's what we call conventional. It

59:35

works well in life, but it has its

59:37

limits. You know that

59:39

it's... and it's disadvantages.

59:43

And if we buy into it and we

59:45

think that the only reality, the only take

59:47

on reality is only this, it's about me,

59:49

it's happening to me, then it's trust arrives.

59:52

The teachings say that, we can go and check

59:55

it out. And

59:57

so we say there's another view that we

59:59

can bring. in and the practice of meditation

1:00:01

to me is to help balance, not

1:00:04

be stuck just it's about being in, but

1:00:07

to recognize it's human nature. It's

1:00:10

not just about you, disease

1:00:13

happens, yes you can

1:00:15

make it very personal, but

1:00:17

there's another view, it's something very natural.

1:00:20

Unfortunately, that

1:00:23

joy is something natural, generosity

1:00:26

is natural, that confusion,

1:00:28

connecting, everything, everything.

1:00:34

So we're playing with both views and

1:00:36

so that's why for example we do

1:00:38

metta. Metta we use conventional reality often

1:00:40

when we do metta. We think of

1:00:42

somebody, we wish them well, we think

1:00:45

of ourselves and we wish well for

1:00:47

ourselves. We say, may I be happy,

1:00:49

may you be happy. It's totally fitting,

1:00:52

it's a good view of reality, but

1:00:55

if we think it's absolute,

1:00:57

we're going to suffer because

1:01:00

death doesn't make sense. If I exist,

1:01:02

why can I not, how can I,

1:01:04

or this person not exist. And

1:01:07

so with

1:01:11

them would be to be

1:01:14

able to move from one reality to

1:01:16

the next, to hold things

1:01:18

with different perspectives. So

1:01:21

instead of rigid self, Temple Smith

1:01:24

talks like this, it's interesting. Has

1:01:27

influence felt, you know,

1:01:30

able to say, yes it's new set

1:01:32

up, but not make it absolute. Yes,

1:01:35

there was really lack of attention

1:01:37

here and it meant this. Do

1:01:40

you see the change of language? So for

1:01:42

the other person it applies to. It's

1:01:45

wow, what an amazing being

1:01:49

or recognition that this was an

1:01:51

event. What

1:01:55

we call a being is a kind

1:01:57

of an event. Like something happened In

1:02:00

the universe very unique, very special. And

1:02:04

it's very natural, the disease. And

1:02:07

at some point, and

1:02:09

sometimes it's a broad sudden, and

1:02:12

sometimes it's natural, old

1:02:15

age. But

1:02:17

it's still, it's a coming together of

1:02:19

different things. That was

1:02:21

very beautiful and precious, maybe, or could it probably go

1:02:24

to that? And

1:02:26

so that, does it resonate, this

1:02:29

two kind of different angles? And

1:02:33

here, for many of us it would be new, like, oh

1:02:35

no, I thought this was absolute reality when we were

1:02:37

talking, and now I'm learning how there's another way. And

1:02:41

it brings freedom, it frees the heart

1:02:43

a bit from that kind of cage

1:02:45

of eyes, about me and

1:02:47

what will happen to me. It's

1:02:50

about you, and what's life happening

1:02:52

here. An

1:02:55

liberating aspect of that other view.

1:02:58

And as Jack Cornfield

1:03:01

says, you don't want to be

1:03:03

stuck also in the absolute view. You need to,

1:03:05

relative to who you are. And

1:03:08

sometimes you would say, you need to

1:03:10

remember your postal call. Otherwise

1:03:12

it's all open, you have

1:03:15

to know which one is your house. To

1:03:18

go back there, it's really important.

1:03:22

And so remember your postal call. And

1:03:29

I remember one time, you know, on the

1:03:31

retreat somebody

1:03:35

was listening to all this stuff, and raised their

1:03:37

hand, and was like,

1:03:39

okay. So I

1:03:43

own a restaurant, it's my

1:03:45

restaurant. So

1:03:47

there's somebody every week who

1:03:49

comes and tags their name on

1:03:51

the window of my restaurant. What

1:03:54

do you do with that? Your Buddhist,

1:03:56

what do you do with that? And

1:04:02

I remember the monastic that was sitting there

1:04:06

here said, yeah,

1:04:09

let me talk to you about two realities.

1:04:11

You know, because if you think there's only

1:04:13

one, it's going to be really frustrating. It

1:04:15

is your restaurant and it is not. And

1:04:19

if you're able to hold both views, you'll

1:04:22

find more peace. And

1:04:25

that's it. You know, when my friend says my

1:04:27

bike was stolen and it's all like this, I

1:04:29

thought it could be me, but

1:04:31

it's all like this. Why? Because

1:04:33

like how insulting, like I was living

1:04:36

in an absolute reality where that was my bike and

1:04:38

somebody's saying actually no, you know, it doesn't hold.

1:04:40

It's not absolute and I'm going to prove it to

1:04:42

you. I'm going to leave with it. You know, it's

1:04:45

not absolutely your bike, you know, it's

1:04:47

relatively your bike as long as everybody

1:04:49

agrees, you know, but it doesn't hold

1:04:51

to the very end. You

1:04:55

see this? It's

1:04:57

relatively mine, you know, it's

1:05:00

conventional reality. And

1:05:04

so for us, it's very wise to

1:05:06

begin to think like, oh yeah, it's

1:05:08

my body, but it's not mine. It's

1:05:11

a play of element, you know, it's very natural that

1:05:14

it will occur to the earth, it

1:05:16

will change. And the

1:05:18

more we understand this, the more we can

1:05:20

have that view also, the easier it

1:05:22

will be for us to...

1:05:26

If you understand that, nothing is really yours.

1:05:28

If you understand this deeply, like

1:05:31

where's the surprise when something is

1:05:33

taken? It's like, oh, of course.

1:05:37

I'll finish with this, Ajahn Chah, the

1:05:39

famous cup. You know, somebody

1:05:41

in the forest of Thailand,

1:05:44

maybe in the northeast of Thailand, somebody

1:05:46

brings him a little English

1:05:48

cup, you know, very sweet

1:05:50

and porcelain English cup, and he

1:05:53

uses it and he says to people, look, it's

1:05:56

already broken in my mind. I know,

1:05:58

I need you, I know. not mine, it's

1:06:01

already broken, then

1:06:03

therefore I can appreciate it. I'm not

1:06:05

in fear, like if somebody knocks it,

1:06:07

I hope so. There

1:06:09

somebody knock it, or if I knock it myself,

1:06:11

I know it's already broken. Then

1:06:14

I get one more day with it, one

1:06:17

more moment. A

1:06:19

deep understanding that it's not

1:06:22

mine, and it's

1:06:24

changing, it's improving. And

1:06:27

if it's beautiful, it's appreciated,

1:06:30

knowing deeply. Not

1:06:34

easy, but possible. That's

1:06:37

what spiritual practice is

1:06:39

about. To understand deeply the

1:06:42

nature of reality, so that we can

1:06:44

be aligned with it. So

1:06:52

in conventional reality, some

1:06:55

of you signed up for

1:06:57

a group, and so there it

1:06:59

is. And there's an

1:07:01

amazing weather for practice. Practice

1:07:05

is always perfect, the weather is always

1:07:07

perfect for practice. And

1:07:10

so, yeah, I

1:07:12

wonder what form the exploration will

1:07:14

take for you. Certainly

1:07:19

not forcing anything on ourselves, I

1:07:21

have to understand this, it's

1:07:25

much more humble than that. We

1:07:27

come in gently, and we

1:07:29

see what is within. Enjoy

1:07:34

it. About perfect. Thank

1:07:37

you.