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0:51

From Wondery and Campside Media comes Season 3

0:54

of the hit podcast Suspect. This

0:56

is a story of two victims, one

0:58

murdered in cold blood, one imprisoned

1:00

for a crime he did not commit. Listen

1:03

to Suspect, 5 Shots in the Dark,

1:05

wherever you get your podcasts. Or

1:07

binge all eight episodes ad-free on

1:10

Wondery Plus. Are

1:14

you leaving or are you on your

1:17

way back home? Either way

1:19

we want to be there. Doesn't

1:23

matter how much baggage you claim. Give

1:25

us a time and date, terminal

1:29

and gate. We

1:31

want to send you off in style.

1:34

We want to welcome you back home.

1:39

Tell us all about it. Were you scared

1:41

or was it fine? Mouth

1:44

horn. Mouth

1:54

horn. Mouth horn. Mouth

1:57

horn. Mouth horn. Do

2:01

you need a ride, do you

2:03

need a ride?

2:20

With Karen and Chris. Welcome

2:27

to Do You Need A Ride this is Chris Fairbanks.

2:29

And this is Karen Kilgarif. We are driving

2:33

through Karen's neighborhood just on the

2:36

heels of the 4th of July, the most

2:38

traumatic time

2:39

for pets. Tough. Birds.

2:42

Cats. Nonstop. Dogs.

2:45

They all. Explosions. They

2:47

all. It's negative reviews. Thank

2:50

you. You said your dogs don't seem

2:53

to mind. Frank was

2:55

a stray dog for the majority

2:58

of his life, sadly. So

3:00

he has a real laissez-faire

3:03

attitude about almost everything.

3:04

He's seen a lot. He's been through

3:06

a lot. Fireworks are no big deal to him.

3:09

And then Blossom is a big copycatter.

3:11

So she just does what he does. So luckily,

3:14

I don't have to drug either

3:16

of them like I used to have to drug George, who

3:18

was a hound and so nervous and would

3:20

be

3:21

truly having a nervous breakdown. Yeah,

3:24

I think that I'm the hound dog of people

3:26

because I act like

3:28

I am being reminded of

3:31

the big war. Right. And

3:33

I spent that I never really

3:35

liked for even as a kid, I didn't

3:38

want to light off fireworks. I just don't

3:40

know what's missing in me. Explosions

3:43

don't do it for me. Well, you might be sound

3:45

sensitive. I think we've talked about this before.

3:47

I think I am. My niece is sound sensitive. So

3:49

like when there's a big crazy noise, it

3:52

freaks her out really bad.

3:54

And then she gets really embarrassed where it's like, no, that's

3:56

just because I think she's got real sensitive ears.

3:58

Yeah. category of these

4:01

explosions as hearing someone smack,

4:03

hearing someone's kiss, hearing someone

4:06

scratch a chalkboard.

4:08

Or like I was watching TikTok

4:10

and a guy was saying something very deep and

4:12

almost like a therapeutic type

4:14

of advice. And then he bit into

4:17

something. I wasn't looking straight at the phone

4:20

and I was so livid immediately. I was

4:22

just like, never again.

4:24

So we will once again apologize for

4:26

the episode where we ate a dozen donuts.

4:29

Yeah. And also there was one time where I

4:31

just freely ate

4:33

a Rice Krispie treat.

4:34

One of the louder things you could possibly eat.

4:37

Right. Well, you never know what

4:39

edible gifts our gifts are going to bring us. True.

4:43

We don't want to be rude to one person. So we're

4:45

rude to all of you.

4:46

We don't. Yeah, exactly. We

4:48

want to make the people who are actually showing up for us

4:50

suffer. In stereo.

4:53

And I actually wasn't even a gift. It was me

4:56

gifting myself something from Starbucks, which

4:58

is like even more on this. That's the same thing.

5:00

You wrapped it.

5:01

I remember there was a ribbon. I

5:04

pretended to be surprised. I just,

5:06

I'm, it's so funny though, this weekend

5:09

I was around two dogs, one obviously

5:11

from the streets and was used

5:14

to some noises. And the other dog was a

5:16

huge, muscular,

5:18

some sort of a bold, mastiff type

5:21

dog. Yeah. And was

5:23

trembling in a way where I'm

5:25

like, this is trauma. I'm watching trauma

5:27

happen. Yeah. I

5:29

would not stop shaking and was not mimicking

5:32

the other dog. No. And it was the

5:34

strongest looking dog. Yeah. That

5:36

also was a rescue, but just it's, you know,

5:39

yeah. It was a little sound sensitive.

5:41

It was sound sensitive. Maybe it had already

5:43

had bad, loud sound experiences.

5:46

Like that's the thing I do when

5:48

I look at my dogs

5:50

and you start to think what life have you

5:52

led? And I can make myself cry

5:55

in about 10 seconds when I do that. And

5:57

you can only get a, so

5:59

I therapy. acutically ate a rice

6:01

kiss crispy treat right in front of their stogs

6:04

face Get used

6:06

to it. I yelled you think that sounds bad.

6:08

I said Listen to me smack

6:10

around on a rice crispy treat against

6:13

your will. It's like I could get used to

6:15

this

6:17

Yeah, I went to Venice Beach where

6:19

I'm reminded It's utter

6:21

chaos people the fireworks

6:23

that are supposed to explode loudly in the sky

6:26

We're just being laid down casually in

6:28

the sand towards

6:30

people just chilling in blankets and

6:32

no one was Chasing

6:35

after the culprit. It was just like hey,

6:37

I love this country and I'm glad that I lost

6:40

a finger It was so

6:42

it was chaos.

6:43

Yeah. Well, you know, what's funny is two

6:46

days before 4th of July I was driving

6:48

down York Boulevard in Eagle Rock a

6:51

very hip and cool Area

6:53

of this Los Angeles and

6:55

someone threw an M80 in the street and so

6:58

there was kind of a flash and then there was a gigantic

7:01

boom and I

7:03

thought my car was exploding

7:05

or something and Then

7:08

it just kind of look that

7:10

should where's it coming from? They shouldn't be a little that

7:12

siren Yeah, yeah, I have to announce

7:14

what sounds were hearing cars such a

7:17

studio. Oh, that's true We heard a siren

7:19

through this is insulated

7:22

Karen had the car modified. I just lightly

7:24

modified I had the fin put on the back and

7:27

then I said throw up some acoustic

7:29

tiles in here Yeah, yeah, you did

7:31

have this giant spoiler put on. Oh, look

7:34

they're driving down the wrong side of the road That's my favorite

7:36

those fire. Miss they must be from England.

7:38

Those are the firemen that don't give a shit. Oh, yeah

7:42

I've seen a lot of that lately. They're being really

7:44

punk rock. They have to it's

7:46

a fire Well, I hope it ends

7:48

safe for whoever they're going to visit but

7:51

don't let the fire Don't

7:53

let the fire department ruin my great M80

7:56

story, which is also about danger. I mean,

7:58

it's a quarter stick of Dynamite if

8:01

I recall correctly. Oh, is that true? Yes, and

8:03

so a actual Maybe

8:07

is three three Three

8:09

six. I'm not very good at math a

8:12

quarter is What do you mean that can't

8:14

be right because a stick of dynamite? I'm

8:18

wrong. It has to be wrong. I think

8:20

that's one sixteenth. Yeah. Yeah,

8:22

it's got to be a one sixteenth stick of dynamite

8:24

Yeah, that sounds more recent just lengthwise alone.

8:27

You're too stubby

8:28

I've had you lit off and I made

8:31

of yourself. I have I mean I went

8:33

through a normal childhood I just wasn't enjoying

8:35

it when you get a little GI

8:38

Joe doll you strap it to his back Have

8:41

a long wick. Yeah involve gasoline

8:44

Glass no stung by three bees

8:47

at Aaron decent's house

8:49

That all happened at one time. I was

8:51

yeah, I was not allowed to stay there again. I

8:54

stepped on a nail I got stung by bees the

8:56

bees weren't the fault of the decent

8:58

family They were a decent family and they were

9:00

Mormons, but they did have a lot

9:02

of bees and literal bats in their bill

9:04

free And I

9:07

I was not allowed to stay there I came I had

9:10

too many stories and and

9:13

one of them was lighting gasoline

9:15

Which then was supposed to light the wick?

9:18

No. Yeah, and we were blowing up

9:20

little army men That

9:23

that's from the movie Toy Story where you're

9:25

the evil neighbor child exactly

9:28

Exactly, and none of these little toys

9:31

are gonna come with me to college very

9:33

sad But this stick of

9:35

dynamite quarter to one sixteenth

9:38

will Toy

9:39

Story is a ripoff

9:41

of Move

9:44

an electric plane. What was the electric blanket

9:47

movie the brave little toaster? It was

9:49

called It's called the brave

9:51

little toaster. Okay, but it was much

9:54

sadder because it was a cabin that hadn't been

9:56

inhabited For year and they're

9:58

waiting for the family to come for that

9:59

summer vacation and the kid

10:02

had grown and gone off to college and the family

10:04

were in a train

10:06

wreck or something and all this electric

10:09

bank blanket this toaster this lamp

10:11

they're like when are they coming we

10:13

have so much fun when they're here and

10:15

it was way sadder than Toy

10:17

Story. Jesus. And yeah

10:20

it was not a lot of famous people

10:22

except for John Lovett's. One

10:25

of the greats? One of the greats when it comes

10:27

to you it was his early work if you check

10:29

IMDB, Brave Little Toaster, he was a kid.

10:33

He was little John Lovett. Oh shit

10:35

look at this traffic. But that the animator

10:37

of that approached Howard Kramer and I

10:40

about doing something

10:42

where comedians sit in a bathroom in a toilet

10:44

stall and then the graffiti on the

10:47

walls would come to life and it was a way to interview

10:49

people.

10:49

So they could tell stories and then

10:52

a little I thought was a good idea. It is a good

10:54

idea. You spent some time with the Brave Little Toaster

10:56

guy. Wait a second congratulations. Thank

10:58

you. It didn't go anywhere with many

11:01

failed projects. As

11:03

you interview people like the graffiti

11:05

changes behind you or something? Yes it

11:08

comes to life. And

11:10

we got the idea from this animator. It looks

11:12

like a flip book animation but it was

11:14

he could do it on any surface. So

11:17

a lone guy could run for a good time

11:19

call this phone number swing on one of those

11:21

numbers land on the toilet paper roll and

11:23

at the end you know. For a good

11:25

time. You have to be flushed of course. Sure.

11:29

Because it's in a toilet stall.

11:29

But who are you interviewing in that scenario? It

11:32

was supposed to be comedians.

11:34

Oh guess what we are. Sorry I must interrupt

11:37

you to say we're getting into the carpool lane.

11:38

Oh it feels so good. Me, Chris,

11:41

Anneliese making it happen in California.

11:43

Anytime you're in the carpool lane you realize

11:46

how lonely you've been. Because

11:50

I rarely am able to use

11:52

it. Yeah. Also I wonder

11:54

if I can use it because the type of car this is

11:56

it's electric. Well I

11:58

don't want you to be. use the

12:01

system. What do you care? You

12:03

don't know for your own well-being it'll make

12:05

you feel bad. You

12:07

know how you are with the system. How

12:10

much you love the system as it

12:13

exists. You love the system as it works as a well-oiled

12:15

machine, and I know you're pro-government.

12:18

I just think we need bigger government with

12:21

more oppressive

12:21

laws. On a civic level,

12:24

citywide. Yes, I think we need to

12:27

keep on doing everything that

12:29

early 30s Berlin was doing, and pretend

12:32

it's not happening. The

12:33

mayor should be armed. We

12:36

have a lot of good ideas on this podcast, and

12:38

that's why you tune in. And that's why

12:41

we are on a billboard in Times Square. Oh

12:43

my god. That's still so exciting. Did

12:45

you see that? Did you see some pictures

12:47

of the billboard? Oh, I did. I

12:49

even saw a quick video, and

12:51

Michelle Bloom stopped by and took another

12:53

photo.

12:53

Michelle Bloom texted me and was like, hi,

12:55

I've taught you well, but I'm so excited, and sent

12:58

that picture. In that picture, I

13:00

realized not only was it the

13:02

art I did a long, long time ago, and

13:04

all the imagery and the color

13:07

I like, but our names. Yeah,

13:09

and our faces drawn by you. So if you

13:12

haven't seen it,

13:13

just go take a flight

13:15

to New York City. They're so inexpensive.

13:18

Right, and the American Eagle

13:20

Outfitter Building. And it's

13:22

so easy to fly these days. Just

13:25

do it, because it's for us, and then you're just looking

13:28

at a thing

13:28

you could also see on social media. Yeah, as

13:30

far as I recall, there's a helicopter

13:32

pad right on top of 30 Rock. You can land

13:34

there. I don't know where it is in New

13:37

York. Spend

13:37

the money. Times Square. Times

13:39

Square. Is 30 Rock there? I

13:41

don't know. Oh, I don't know either. It's

13:45

on my TV. Yeah, it's been

13:47

so long since I was a page. Here's

13:51

what I liked about that

13:54

billboard. Billboard. Yes. Is

13:57

looking at it and remembering.

14:00

remembering, like, you and I putting

14:02

this podcast together alone. Right.

14:05

And like, I just think it's a little bit miraculous.

14:07

It is. That we've done it and

14:09

we continue to do it where, like, you and I didn't know

14:11

each other super well, right?

14:14

We were like, we'd been at some parties

14:16

and done comedy shows together, but it wasn't like we knew

14:18

each other. Right. And we just basically were

14:21

like, let's cobble together this

14:23

thing to do and

14:24

then try it. I

14:26

just think it's a real testament to

14:29

our friendship where we didn't

14:31

ruin it for each other and we didn't stop being friends.

14:34

Yes. Yeah. Which

14:36

could have happened. I know. And it didn't

14:38

really sink in until, I mean,

14:40

of course, there are little hints, like

14:42

people coming to my shows and nice messages

14:45

and all those things. I have appreciated

14:47

it so far. But that billboard,

14:49

yeah, very tangible, even though I wasn't

14:51

actually touching it. Tap,

14:53

tap palpable, even though I wasn't licking

14:56

it like Shana's very wallpaper. Very

14:59

I could smell it.

15:00

I could see it. Yeah. Let's

15:03

just say I could see it. It's a photo, for God's sake. It

15:05

is a photo. But it also is a symbol

15:07

of when you have a

15:09

good idea

15:11

and you have talented friends,

15:13

it doesn't, you don't have to know where you're

15:15

going to land. Did we think we were going

15:17

to land in Times Square?

15:18

No. No. I

15:21

thought he was going to land flat on my ass like I do every time. I'm

15:23

kidding. That's fine. That's farcical.

15:26

It's underdog comedy. It's what we like. Yeah,

15:28

yeah, yeah. And yeah, I'm

15:31

just proud of us. I am too. Yeah. I'm

15:34

patting you on the back and me simultaneously,

15:36

which is hard. It is tough. It's

15:38

like rubbing your belly and tapping your head.

15:39

You're double jointed, so you're doing

15:41

it great. Yeah. I'm doing it like Jim Carrey

15:44

in that old stand up hit. But also,

15:46

you kept on, we started doing

15:49

it in 2014, I believe. Oh,

15:52

yeah. I believe someone recently told,

15:55

I think it was in some of the thing

15:57

for our new season where it's like we've been doing it since 2014.

15:59

we actually said it may be in the promo. So

16:03

that alone was like, oh, that's a really long

16:05

time ago. So that's kind of hilarious. And

16:07

then I remember there was certain points

16:09

where I would be like in the early days

16:12

where I was so like, I was working, everything

16:15

was super stressful. I was so broke. And

16:17

then I would just be like, yeah, I didn't ask

16:19

anybody to do it. Like when you and I would talk on the phone, I

16:22

would be like borderline quitting and

16:24

you'd be like, I'm gonna call Henry Phillips. And

16:26

then you would just take care of it. And you did

16:28

that a lot for me in the early days and I appreciate

16:31

it. Oh, well, thanks.

16:32

I knew it would work.

16:34

I knew we had something. I knew

16:36

it. I was just like Andrew Ridgefield

16:39

and Wham first started. Sorry, I just watched

16:41

the documentary. I knew I

16:43

have myself a George Michael.

16:46

And I would take second banana seed

16:50

eventually and look at me now. Passenger

16:53

seed.

16:54

I hardly write any of our hits. Then

16:57

suddenly along for the ride. But you

16:59

are Wham and that's the thing. There is no

17:01

Wham without Andrew Ridgefield. Yeah,

17:04

yeah, I'm not gonna go off and do some solo

17:07

stuff. I mean, are you? Mm-mm. There

17:10

was the one time I went to the

17:12

airport by myself and talked to myself

17:15

out of necessity, I guess. Right.

17:18

And it was horrifying, so I... Horrible. Yeah,

17:20

I can only do it with you. Okay, good, thanks.

17:22

Well, or your dad. Andrew Ridgefield,

17:25

by the way, I think I'm saying his name correctly. Ridgeley,

17:28

it is Ridgeley. I don't know why I had a

17:30

field. Anyway, I'm Chris Fairbanks

17:32

field. He was really

17:34

talented and he was like this

17:36

documentary basically, it's

17:38

not the best. I'm not promoting it. It's

17:41

a bit of a snooze fest. Oh. But

17:43

it was, I like Wham a lot.

17:46

I love Wham. And I think if

17:48

you tell yourself you don't like Wham, you're

17:50

lying to yourself just like with Abba. You

17:52

do like it.

17:53

It's music

17:55

that the people who made it are geniuses

17:58

at music. So if you don't like it. That's

18:00

on you. Yeah, and the documentary was

18:03

kind of showing George Michael

18:05

developing this confidence and then kind of

18:08

Going off on his own and as well

18:11

as all of a sudden becoming good-looking

18:13

and being confident And

18:15

well, but he wouldn't have done it without Andrew.

18:18

I don't want to argue with you immediately after

18:21

Saying thank you to you, but I'm going to because

18:23

I was 12 Was

18:26

I 12? No, I was 14 when that video

18:28

hit the argument you were 12 You

18:32

have to argue. I'm 12. Okay, I was 14 when that came in I

18:35

was a freshman in high school and I'll never forget

18:37

I went to my friends I think

18:40

she was just having a slumber party and

18:42

we were down in her in the rumpest room

18:45

and she turns on MTV and Here

18:47

comes wham. None of us had seen it before it was

18:49

like the the video premiere And

18:52

I don't know if you remember the wake me up before

18:54

you go-go video But they're wearing shirts that say like

18:57

choose like choose life. Yeah, so

18:59

other stuff. It was

19:00

not about abortion rights They

19:02

would never do that but it was like

19:05

it was a it was kind of like I do is it

19:07

and I I

19:07

think it was at a time

19:10

where they're doing a lot of Promoting

19:12

all a lot of both those Christmas

19:14

songs

19:16

Were for AIDS. Yes

19:18

research and everything. I think it was AIDS related

19:22

Yes, I think so too and I also think it was

19:24

like because that whole video is like wildly

19:27

You can't not be in a good mood when you watch that Yeah,

19:29

because everything's like white black or

19:32

neon yellow green and orange

19:34

Yeah, and and George

19:36

Michael I remember thinking I

19:38

can't figure out if I want that

19:40

haircut or I'm in love with him Right

19:42

because he was like he was wearing two hoop earrings

19:45

Just like a girl and his face look like a girl

19:47

and I think he had pink lipstick on very

19:49

subtly But it was but that in 1984

19:51

was groundbreaking and very rare Yeah,

19:55

so it was just like who is this and

19:57

then it was like one of the best pop songs ever written

19:59

Yeah, and that was kind

20:02

of what the documentary was about. They did not

20:04

expect teenage

20:06

girls everywhere to suddenly

20:08

be loving them. Well,

20:11

and let me just say this about Andrew Ridgeley-Ridgfield.

20:14

That guy's hot. He was like the

20:16

model where I was always like, does he really

20:19

play that guitar? Did they just get him

20:21

in this band like an adult boy

20:22

band? Yeah, and that's what George Michael

20:24

was saying. It's like he was supposed to be the sexual

20:29

heartthrob figure. Right?

20:32

Everything backfired, and then I got this

20:34

face. He points to his face. Wait,

20:37

did he get plastic surgery? No,

20:39

no. He just really, all the angles

20:42

came in. You know, they were like 19 or 20 when

20:44

they were excused. Once

20:51

I start talking about him developing,

20:53

I get it.

20:55

I start choking. It's like I'm

20:57

salivating. But

20:59

yeah, he just became an

21:02

angled-faced, handsome

21:04

person. Yeah. They show childhood

21:07

pictures of him, and he looks

21:10

older and has

21:12

a strange beard without a mustache.

21:14

He looked like maybe he churns butter.

21:17

Wait, sorry, he had a beard as a child? Yes,

21:19

yes. Or they were showing pictures of his

21:21

father and it was bad editing. Oh. Pictures

21:24

of his father and it was bad editing.

21:25

Oh. Or could it have been that he dressed

21:28

up as a hobo for Halloween? I think the

21:30

beard was made of coffee. Yeah, in

21:32

Vaseline. Yeah, it's funny. It's funny.

21:35

There's a bear attack in the middle. Yeah,

21:38

it was very, it was very, I didn't

21:40

mean to talk so much about Wham, but

21:42

I did just watch it. I had

21:45

to relate it to us.

21:46

I could talk about Wham. It

21:49

was a real, what's

21:51

the word, it's like a foundational background

21:54

music of high school

21:56

for me. Right. And

21:58

in my, oh. older sisters,

22:00

one of the many things she's like here listen to

22:02

this if you want to be cool don't listen to poison

22:05

and deaf leopard like your friend.

22:08

Even though that is what you're supposed to listen

22:10

to

22:10

to be called but much like us they were really good

22:12

friends they knew each other's children and

22:14

and the whole time Andrew.

22:17

Rich field was it's

22:19

the route richly was very just

22:21

like yeah, he wants to be a solo guy

22:24

he's really good at writing songs and proud of him

22:26

there was no animosity and everyone always jokes

22:28

about

22:29

that poor guy either

22:31

they say was along for the ride or

22:34

he got cast aside now now he

22:36

was like didn't become a race car driver. Probably

22:39

they also showed footage of him skating

22:41

and he was really good at skateboarding it was

22:43

like in a pool grinding so all

22:45

of a sudden now I'm fine which wham

22:48

guy do I like the most right this guy's doing

22:50

front side scratch.

22:52

I know correct on its. Did

22:55

you see it wait just to change the subject

22:57

of off when for one second that will go

22:59

back to it will be the right back when I'm

23:02

talking will be right back.

23:04

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24:22

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25:22

Did you see that little girl that did a... I believe

25:25

it's a 720. 720, yeah. Oh! Unbelievable.

25:29

And especially the way she lands

25:31

it and her entire body compacts.

25:34

Like, she lands it on her feet on the board,

25:37

but her knees are like... one of the knees

25:39

is on the board. Yes, and she

25:41

almost falls and then doesn't. Yeah. But

25:44

when I tell you the way

25:47

those boys ran to congratulate

25:49

her, it's like I can't... I've seen it

25:52

so many times on TikTok. I sob

25:54

every time. Yeah.

25:56

It's so sweet and inclusive

25:58

and, like, they get it.

27:58

Not the sound

28:00

man. No. And, you

28:02

know. I did that for years,

28:04

and the whole time, it was not a skill I possessed.

28:09

It's a hard one. Yeah. And there was times

28:11

where I was doing it while driving. Yes,

28:13

you were. But I think

28:15

that was the last time you did it while driving. I said

28:18

to myself, don't ever let him do this again.

28:20

Right. Yeah. It was dangerous,

28:22

and I probably, it was one of those episodes.

28:24

People have admitted that there are episodes

28:27

where we're both losing our minds at LAX.

28:30

Yes. Like yelling

28:32

some actually hateful things. Yes, it's horrible. Well,

28:35

and also there were times where you would

28:37

be driving, and you would know something was wrong with

28:39

the sound. I would be trying to talk to

28:41

the guest, and you'd be like, yeah,

28:43

it's fine. And it

28:45

was like you were trying to pretend. Yeah.

28:48

That you could just kind of be in it and out of it. But like,

28:50

you're carrying

28:52

this terrible secret. It is the worst feeling where you're

28:55

halfway through, and you realize,

28:57

oh, I'm not recording.

28:59

Yeah. That happened. I

29:02

mean. I think

29:04

it's safe to say those were some of our best episodes

29:06

that I lost. Well, I would not

29:09

say you lost them. I would say it was me. They

29:11

were lost to time. Yes. It wasn't

29:13

meant to be. Yeah, exactly. Everything

29:15

happens for a reason. Everyone

29:18

says that for a reason.

29:20

To make themselves feel better for a reason.

29:24

I just washed my car

29:26

the other day, and I'm so glad I did.

29:27

This is the thing I love to do. I

29:29

went to a hair appointment, showed up at 10 AM for

29:32

that

29:33

hair appointment. The hair appointment. Hi. Am

29:36

I? We both gone here? Yeah. I

29:39

guess so. And we both showed up for the

29:41

hair appointment, and it was an

29:43

hour later. So I showed up at 10, and it was at 11. And

29:46

they were like, oh, I'm so sorry, whatever. And I'm

29:49

like, no problem. I'm going to go get a picture of my hair appointment. I'm

29:52

going to go get about five things done. And then instead

29:54

of doing that, I just went and washed

29:57

my own car at one of those.

29:59

drive up yourself, do it yourself,

30:02

vacuum it out yourself. Yes. I've never planned

30:04

to wash my car. It's always when all

30:06

of a sudden I see a gap in time and I happen

30:08

to be passing by a handy J hand

30:10

wash. Yeah. Then you just get, but

30:13

those self wash, car

30:15

wash places, there's not that many anymore.

30:18

Right. I know the two, there's

30:20

one in Silver Lake, there's one in Burbank

30:22

and most of the time you

30:24

have to go, get out of your car and

30:26

then other people do it for you. I

30:28

kind of prefer it because they do a really good

30:30

job. Yes, they do. Yeah. For

30:33

sure. But then you have to sit somewhere.

30:37

At a waiting table, yeah. Kind

30:39

of feel weird and hope it goes fast.

30:41

I don't know. I always make small talk on the

30:43

waiting bench. No, that's not true. What

30:45

year is that, I'll say? Is that all

30:47

wheel drive, things like that?

30:49

Dude stuff, I get it. Yeah,

30:51

and I'll usually do it with ladies. I

30:54

find the best disarming thing you could

30:56

do is, it's a casual

30:59

dude talk with ladies. That's true.

31:00

Then they're like, since I'm a person

31:03

and I think about cars. Yeah.

31:06

Isn't that sad

31:07

that that's really the bar where it's

31:09

like, this is great, he's treating me like a person.

31:12

I know, I hope I'm not doing it on purpose.

31:15

Treating him like a person on purpose? Oh,

31:18

like a blatant, hey. Hey,

31:21

dude talk. Yeah, who's

31:23

your favorite baseball catcher? And

31:28

they're just staring at you. Not

31:31

the girls can't love baseball. I

31:33

actually, I know it's since

31:35

I've moved to Echo Park. I

31:38

have a lot of lady friends that like baseball.

31:41

There's

31:41

a lot of pressure to get into baseball.

31:44

Yeah, you got to know. Yeah, in

31:47

my neighborhood, if you don't, you could be

31:49

in danger.

31:50

Well, you have to support

31:52

the Dodgers. Yes, it's the first

31:54

thing I did. I have to get a Dodger hat. This

31:56

is getting,

31:57

people are looking at me suspiciously.

31:59

they have an intense relationship, but also it's because right

32:02

over the hill, there's Dodger Stadium. Right.

32:05

It's nice. I like that I can walk there. God,

32:08

that reminds me of my great, great story

32:10

from COVID. There are no time, but

32:13

this is a great one.

32:15

That I went to go get

32:18

my first COVID test at Dodger Stadium.

32:20

So that's how early in quarantine

32:22

we were in. Here's

32:25

my great victory story that you already know, which

32:27

is that I took the GPS

32:29

directions to get to Dodger Stadium,

32:32

which had me going from the valley

32:35

down, this is fascinating stuff, for basically

32:38

down the five, taking the Dodger

32:40

Stadium exit, coming around the back.

32:42

And then I just started following the person in front of me because

32:45

I'm like, there's no way this person isn't going where

32:47

I'm going. So I'll just go where they go. So

32:49

I do, I

32:50

get all the way up to a police

32:55

barricade with police at it. And

32:57

the car in front of me, they move the police

32:59

barricade for the car in front of me. And then I

33:01

go to, and then the cop

33:03

kind of leans forward and goes, which area

33:06

are you working in? And I go, no,

33:08

no, I'm here to get a test. And he goes,

33:09

oh, you just cut in like the employee line.

33:12

And I was like, oh, I didn't mean to. That's what GPS

33:14

told me to do. And he goes, oh, all right.

33:16

Well, you better drive right up there. I cut like

33:19

a two hour wait line with

33:21

all the people in their cars that were that were

33:23

waiting all the way up. I just basically

33:25

cut in front of everybody. And it

33:28

was one of the greatest things that's ever

33:29

happened to me. And at the end, they gave you your

33:31

badge. Yeah, there is

33:34

a lot of police around there. It's like a training

33:36

area they have right at the base of the vehicle.

33:39

They're crawling on the ground

33:41

and practicing the

33:44

Miranda rights. Racial profiling? Yes, they're

33:46

doing a lot of that. They're

33:48

getting good. He

33:51

said with a lot of fear in his voice.

33:55

Wavering. As soon

33:57

as it's funny when I don't have confidence.

34:00

i'm saying not only do increase the volume

34:02

i get a little higher yeah you send it

34:04

up and now on right apps are lower

34:06

lower you know that i'm confident in

34:09

what i'm saying you're confident and standing

34:11

on that tax yes very

34:15

excited for a guest and

34:17

oh my god me too

34:18

yeah what a you know sometimes

34:21

and not very often actually i should be honest

34:23

sometimes this when you when you

34:25

look and go away for things to do their my

34:27

last thing is though record a mobile podcast

34:29

relic of i wish i could just lay on the couch

34:32

not not today not with

34:34

this guess

34:34

oh exactly why we're delighted

34:37

even some of the guess that i know are going to

34:39

be great idea either get nervous

34:41

or are no guarantees she's

34:45

someone that brings me calm

34:48

yes yes she is a while

34:51

she's i've always said this to her

34:53

is she it

34:55

feels to me like she is my cousin

34:58

in that way that she is like me

35:00

and the people i grew up with so

35:02

much that if there's a very bizarre

35:05

familiarity to her oh yeah

35:07

when i very first met her and i was just like the

35:09

fuck did you come from and then i saw her do stand

35:11

up and i'm like you why doesn't everyone

35:14

know who you are from your stand up but

35:16

that you know that happens a lot female comics

35:18

if you're really good somehow

35:20

you're the one that's hosting the show

35:22

instead of headlining

35:24

right kinds a lot yeah because people

35:26

are comfortable with you yeah oh but

35:28

then luckily enough

35:30

she and lisa trigger put

35:33

together a low podcast called that's

35:35

messed up a law and order s v u

35:37

podcast and it's one of our most popular

35:39

podcast on exactly right

35:41

they also advertised in

35:43

times square yes they were up there to

35:46

be her laser a

35:48

or is it lisa lisa i

35:50

these it's lisa yeah oh yeah laser

35:52

what i did a show with her the other night at the improv

35:55

and she was

35:56

she kills

35:58

so hard and it's It's like me,

36:00

it's stand up, that's pretty much personality

36:03

based. Yeah. You know, everyone

36:05

loves her. Every

36:07

time I see her perform, she has the

36:09

audience. And it's done with like,

36:13

not a care in

36:15

the world. I don't care if you like me or not. Right,

36:17

no, she's authentic. Yeah. She's

36:20

hilarious. And I told her, I told her right

36:22

to her face. Good. I'm like, you're just being yourself.

36:24

You're just a funny person and you're doing it without

36:27

even trying.

36:28

Yeah. She has that ease

36:30

about her that makes it like, I

36:33

wish there were so many things when I was doing

36:35

sets like that, that I wish I knew, where it's like,

36:38

if you feel nervous, figure out something

36:40

to do about it. Cause when you act angry,

36:42

everyone knows you're nervous. Right. That

36:45

was always my trick. I'm like, well, I'll just be a big bitch. And

36:47

it's like, yeah, that's a huge tell that you're

36:50

out of your depth, lady.

36:51

Yeah, of all

36:53

people, Barry Katz was being

36:55

interviewed on my phone by

36:57

someone. And that was his main point. If they,

37:00

if an audience can smell that

37:02

you're not comfortable and a lot of the tells

37:04

are this and this and this, you,

37:07

you are in trouble. And I was like, wow, I kind

37:09

of made a career of being uncomfortable

37:11

on stage, flubbing words. I

37:14

learned to make it work eventually, but

37:16

I didn't realize being confident was a big

37:18

part of my job. No one ever told me that.

37:21

Those are good dogs. They are good dogs

37:23

and they're done with the trauma America's

37:26

birthday. They're over here. Yeah, that's

37:28

right. I bet they're so thrilled. I

37:30

really, this year, for some reason it hit me.

37:33

That's it's, I really, I don't

37:35

care for fireworks. I don't want to be

37:37

a broken record, but

37:39

it just really hit me this year. And it's because of

37:41

those dogs. I wonder if there's something you can

37:43

do. Like you could go to Palm Springs

37:46

on 4th of July to. Yeah,

37:48

that seems like a, Get out of town, right?

37:50

Yeah, I think I might, but I'm afraid

37:53

that that'll be Firework City. Cause

37:55

it's just, there's no grass

37:58

to catch on fire. I bet there's fireworks everywhere.

41:59

Like, is this yours? Is somebody

42:02

named Antonio? Like, and then they come and,

42:04

yeah. And they run across the street? Then they just run and get it, yeah. Cause

42:07

I'm on the back, on the back side of a high school.

42:09

Yes, yeah. So it's actually

42:11

kind of the best. Cause the kids are all really cool. I'm

42:14

not near the front side. I'm not where any of them get dropped

42:16

off. So I don't get any of the hubbub of the high school,

42:19

but I get all the

42:21

cool high school vibes and kids ordering

42:23

food to my house. I want, That's

42:26

so funny. I want a cake to get delivered

42:28

to your doorstep with a file in it. Well,

42:31

also that you must be proud because now

42:34

you know that you're the cool lady that won't get

42:36

mad. Yeah. If they order stuff to

42:38

your porch. But I'm married to the lame Clint

42:40

Eastwood man, who goes,

42:42

I swear to God, Nick tend to Chick-fil-A bag

42:44

ends up on this porch. I'm eating it. And I'm like,

42:47

they're just kids that want to eat fast food. Let

42:49

them live. Yeah.

42:50

Who cares? It fires up its grand

42:52

terrina. Yeah, exactly. He

42:55

is slowly turning into Clint Eastwood. Like,

42:57

when we drive now, he goes, look at this

42:59

idiot. He narrates everything happening in

43:01

traffic. And I go, oh, that

43:03

guy that's waiting for a pedestrian to cross before he

43:06

turns. And he goes, oh, I didn't see that.

43:08

Like, he's just so angry all the time

43:10

about nothing. I think he's,

43:13

you know, steps away

43:13

from voting Republican, but

43:16

I'll do what I can. But it's a good venting.

43:18

Don't you think when you're, cause it's you

43:20

by yourself usually in a car. So if

43:22

you're screaming at people, it never goes anywhere.

43:25

Yeah. Hopefully. And he's like a performer.

43:27

So he wants to, he wants someone to hear it. You're right.

43:30

Yeah. You know, if a vent

43:32

falls in the woods,

43:33

all that. Yeah. You know, no one hears

43:36

it. Does it? Yeah. Does anyone

43:38

get to feel better about themselves? Okay. I was just telling

43:40

Chris, a couple of days before the 4th of July,

43:43

I was driving right here or maybe a

43:45

little further down on this street. Okay.

43:47

Someone threw an M80 into the street. Oh

43:49

my God. And it was like, boom. And there was like a

43:52

flash. It was crazy. It was like

43:54

4th of July kickoff.

43:55

This is right where it happened. This neighborhood

43:57

is so wild for the 4th. Like they, it's

43:59

like non. stop from the middle

44:01

of the day where I don't understand the point of

44:04

lighting up fireworks, I can't see it, to

44:06

four in the morning and my neighbor lights them

44:08

off and we watched him do a couple this year and

44:11

when I went to take my kids to school the next morning my

44:14

car was covered in orange firework

44:16

dust because one of his fireworks

44:18

had just shot at my car because

44:21

it tipped over. Yeah.

44:23

You know, not that many people have a license to

44:25

do this kind of thing. In

44:27

Montana it was legal, there's just fireworks

44:30

stands everywhere. Yeah. Just

44:32

outside of town there's like a rule that you have

44:34

to be near a river or something and

44:37

all even as a kid I didn't want

44:40

loud boom fireworks I just wanted that little

44:42

cardboard tank that is usually

44:44

broken or it's missing a wheel but

44:47

it would like you'd light it off and it would shoot some

44:49

sparklers and then a snake would coil out.

44:51

Yeah. And I'd clap and go inside. Yeah.

44:54

So I don't understand the explosions. No,

44:56

it's like, do you know how comedy

44:59

is one of the only like quote-unquote professions

45:01

where you can just do it one time and say that you're it?

45:03

Like people will just do comedy once and

45:05

be like I'm a comedian like that's fireworks

45:08

man everyone's just like I'm a firework

45:10

person I know how to light them off I

45:12

know what I'm doing but nobody does. It's usually,

45:14

yeah it's actually not only do they not know what

45:16

they're doing it's usually people that have a weird obsession

45:19

with fire. Yeah. Something mentally

45:22

questionable but they want to be involved

45:24

in that so directly. Do

45:26

your

45:26

dogs hate

45:29

it so much? That's what I was curious

45:31

about. Yeah, we were talking about this. Luckily

45:33

my dog Frank was found in Eagle

45:35

Rock on the streets. Oh. So he is

45:37

immune. He's like this is my culture.

45:40

Yeah, he's like yeah. And then

45:42

Blossom, the

45:43

new dog just does what he does. So

45:45

there was a couple of those big booms that

45:48

she would kind of sit up and look around but

45:50

Frank was asleep so she's like oh I guess nothing

45:52

bad is happening.

45:53

So luckily because my

45:56

old dog that died two years ago

45:58

was a hound and she was like It was

46:00

the worst day of the year for her. I basically had,

46:02

I learned eventually I had to give her

46:05

Benadryl and make her sleepy so that

46:07

she could at least like be lightly

46:09

drugged because it was so bad.

46:11

Yeah, the house I was at in Venice, we

46:14

all decided demanded the dog

46:16

be drugged. Yeah. Because you had

46:18

the sleepy calm down drugs, I don't believe

46:20

they're called that. Sleepy calm down?

46:23

Yeah, do you have any sleepy calm downs? No, four

46:25

dogs. Doggy sleepy calm down. You actually have dog specific

46:28

and I took it for my analogy. I don't have

46:30

dogs, but they have kid melatonin and I give

46:32

that to my kids on the plane. Oh yeah. Yeah,

46:35

got to. Get on,

46:37

get nice and drowsy. What's

46:40

the craziest or a story

46:43

from your children on a plane? Do you have any nightmares?

46:45

Oh my God. Yeah, has there been any? The

46:48

first time, well like the best advice

46:50

anyone ever gave me if anyone is listening that

46:53

like is going to have a kid or has a tiny

46:55

kid and having trouble is like bring extra

46:57

clothes and not just for your kids, for

47:00

you. Oh no. You got to bring extra clothes

47:02

for everyone in your family. Oh. The

47:04

very first flight we went on, Oscar

47:07

was never a big

47:09

bar for turbo barf

47:11

just all over me on the flight. Just

47:14

everywhere and I

47:16

had to change my clothes, I had to change his clothes.

47:18

My daughter has just gone

47:21

to the bathroom with me on the plane and then

47:23

gone, uh oh, she's let

47:25

her pee go onto her underwear. Is it due to

47:27

cap pressure? It's just, yeah, I don't know

47:29

what is up. She's mischievous. She's

47:32

like, what'll happen if I pee in my own underwear? And

47:34

so then on that flight, I didn't

47:37

have pants or underwear for

47:39

her on me. I

47:42

mean, I did in the check suitcase, so I

47:44

just had like a Delta blanket wrapped around

47:47

her and she's not staying still. So

47:50

she's giving a flash and everyone on the plane

47:52

with her little three year old butt at the time. And

47:56

but yeah, I'm flying with them for the first

47:59

time in August by my.

47:59

Oh, so that will

48:02

be interesting. I've flown with just my daughter

48:04

alone, but I've never flown with the two of them alone,

48:06

and it's gonna be

48:08

wild yeah, but You

48:11

know I just Rely

48:13

on those Delta blankets. Yeah, well,

48:16

I'm gonna be so I mean I'm gonna start packing like seven

48:18

days in advance I'm gonna be it's gonna be like a military

48:21

exercise like truly. I've already booked my

48:23

ride I'm already like Figuring

48:25

out all the different ways that I can like get because

48:28

I got the only hard part is checking the

48:30

bags because I'm gonna Have a stroller and bags.

48:32

It's a lot you guys have you ever you

48:34

guys follow me on Instagram Did you guys happen to

48:36

see the photos of me with the kids when I was wheeling

48:38

them through? I got these things that attach

48:41

to their to

48:42

their car seats, and I just wheeled them like luggage

48:44

Oh through the airport my daughter outgrew

48:47

it But it was the best hack because I could just

48:49

take them through everything they felt

48:51

like they were getting a ride Yeah, it was amazing

48:53

They're facing the other way

48:55

they're facing people they're going what's up People

48:58

go you have too many bags, and then they look down and they see

49:00

that it's a trial that I'm like out of my way You

49:03

know

49:04

it's the best yes, so yeah, you're

49:06

just constantly trying to like hack the whole travel

49:08

process But I would say just yeah him barfing on me

49:11

Rosie Like Rosie

49:13

now is cool. She'll just watch TV the whole time which

49:15

is great Oscar I don't know what I'm gonna do

49:17

with him. He's such a little wiggle worm He wants to

49:19

go get his hands and everything like he

49:22

is I'm not a dog owner I haven't ever had

49:24

a dog But he is like that puppy

49:26

that will find any tiny hole in the fence

49:28

yeah and get and try to escape yeah

49:30

It's like he doesn't like his life with us because

49:33

any time There's

49:34

a small crack in a gate or

49:36

a fence or a door It's like he's

49:38

gone like we were just that we I take my kids

49:40

to dragcon every year And they

49:43

were in this kids area and then Brent

49:45

Sullivan was I was with Brent Sullivan and Elliott

49:47

Glaser and Brent turns Sally and goes Kara's

49:50

child is running away Him

49:54

instead of you

49:56

and Oscar had just run out to like

49:58

the area these double doors where

50:00

there was, it was where all the food trucks were, so luckily that was

50:02

enclosed, but could've just been traffic.

50:05

I mean, he, I tried, me and a librarian

50:07

chased him and got him moments

50:09

before he ran into full three

50:12

lane traffic on Figueroa

50:14

here in Los Angeles. It was, and he was

50:17

laughing gleefully the entire

50:19

way, pumping his arms like, take me

50:21

back to heaven Lord! And he was like,

50:24

I'm chasing him screaming, and

50:26

it's only making him laugh harder. Yes,

50:28

somebody who's a child psychologist, tell me what

50:31

that, what does all that symbolism mean? That

50:33

second born, that's the freedom of being

50:35

second born. I swear to

50:37

God, because that's what I was like too, when I was little, where

50:39

I would get these ideas, where it's like,

50:41

what would be fun? What could I do right

50:43

now that would be really fun? And it

50:45

was always something like, drag a pencil

50:47

along a white wall. Yeah,

50:49

that's fun. Grape juice poured out

50:51

of this glass at the guest, at the, at

50:54

someone else's house that I don't know, like

50:56

always, and my mom was like, I can't take

50:58

you anywhere, like, it was crazy.

51:01

Meanwhile, my sister

51:02

was the most low key, the

51:05

most like quiet, shy, like

51:07

crazy. Yeah, but mine are

51:09

both psycho. I don't even get a, I don't even get

51:12

a chill one. Rosie, Rosie

51:14

doesn't have a death wish like Oscar does, but she,

51:16

she is mischievous, she's so mischievous.

51:18

But Oscar threw my phone at the flat screen

51:21

the other day, had to get a new flat

51:23

screen. Are you serious? Oh yeah, he fully

51:25

damaged. I mean, like you couldn't watch

51:27

TV on it anymore. It's just

51:29

never ending. And what do you

51:32

guys do

51:33

when something like that happens? Do you yell?

51:35

Are you like the parents and never say no?

51:38

No, oh my God. We say no all

51:40

the time. Okay. Cause permissive parenting

51:42

is going to be the downfall of

51:44

the society. Yes it is. Because I see

51:46

it in practice every day and it's not

51:49

working. No. But, but

51:51

I,

51:51

I, we, we yell at him to say, we

51:54

go, Oscar, no. It doesn't matter. So

51:57

now it's like what I've been told is

51:59

like saying.

51:59

know very sternly and then this sounds

52:02

wild but ignore him for like 15

52:04

to 30 seconds so that he knows

52:06

like this doesn't get you the attention that you

52:08

want. Yeah, you know, because that's I

52:11

don't know everything I follow all the new agey

52:13

parent instagrams and they're all like you

52:16

know your toddler doesn't know how to express himself

52:18

and that's why he's throwing a cell phone at the flat

52:20

screen, you know, and I'm like okay,

52:22

but I can't afford his

52:24

lack of knowledge of his emotions.

52:27

Yeah, you know we've got a

52:30

like he used to he just stopped

52:32

just throwing his plate on the floor when

52:34

ever he was done with the food on it

52:36

for not on it just throw the whole thing on

52:38

the floor like done. It would set

52:41

me off and I would coast and he would

52:43

go. Like he does that

52:46

allowed for a loud yell does not

52:48

register to him so I just stopped wasting

52:50

my time. We're at the South

52:52

Pass farmers market. Yeah, my

52:55

friend just invited me to this today and I said

52:57

you know I can't I'm doing yeah, well

52:59

that's our surprise for you're taking

53:01

me there to going to do cherry. That's

53:04

the ball base Street party. The

53:08

farmers market is so funny. Yes,

53:10

like I don't know.

53:12

I bring my kids that they just my

53:14

stutter just want some of the ice

53:16

cream there. Yeah, other kids are like sampling

53:18

fresh vegetables not mine. I was

53:21

she was a vegetarian who doesn't need any vegetables.

53:24

I get because there's

53:25

all these different farm stands and

53:28

I feel bad if you get everything at one

53:30

so I'll get let us here. I'll get you

53:32

got to hear shop around.

53:34

Yeah, you can't just go with one

53:37

sport everybody you know what I want to go to a farmers

53:39

market for soon I want to get my knives sharpened.

53:43

I just want to pack all my knives in a bag and

53:45

bring them to somebody there's always a knife sharpener

53:47

at those things it seems

53:49

like some guy with a little truck and Scott.

53:53

Yeah, that was such a thing

53:55

for my dad to do when I was a kid we would

53:57

go to the Army Navy surplus story.

53:59

I knew the guy's name. He had a little monkey

54:02

with him with a fence. Yeah, what? A

54:05

live monkey? Yeah, maybe it was a dog. But

54:07

he had a companion that wasn't

54:09

human. OK. He would do it. My

54:11

dad would bring a Swiss army knife, some of our

54:14

better kitchen knives, and this guy would make

54:16

them

54:17

dangerous. Sharpen everything up.

54:19

Yeah, it's because I don't trust myself

54:23

to sharpen my own knives. No, I don't really

54:25

know how to do it. But honestly, cooking with dull

54:27

knives is dangerous. And

54:30

my dad used to sharpen knives before

54:32

he cooked all the time. He would stand around and talk

54:34

and do it. But I

54:37

think it's just basically you have to go one direction

54:39

on

54:40

the sharpener thing. Yeah,

54:42

I have that thing. It looks like a sword. But

54:45

I don't know how to use it. I'll ask

54:47

my dad, and then I'll tell you guys.

54:48

Well, there is a new thing. Could you ask your dad

54:50

to actually explain it in a voice memo and then send me

54:52

that? I would really like that.

54:56

I would listen to that podcast. Karen's

54:59

dad tells you how to do stuff that

55:02

you should know how to do. Yes, and he'll

55:04

tell you that part too.

55:05

I think that's a good idea. We got to record

55:07

dad's giving advice and

55:10

how-to directions for things. I

55:12

don't want to make you feel bad, but

55:14

there is an entire hashtag world

55:17

on TikTok that literally is that.

55:19

Well, is it a podcast yet?

55:22

No. That's my

55:24

idea. I shouldn't say no. There's like 800,000 podcasts.

55:28

Wait, the TikTok is people giving,

55:30

dad's giving advice? It's dad's literally

55:32

going, so if your

55:35

lawn mower isn't starting, here's what you got to check.

55:38

You know, just saying. So it's basically stuff around

55:40

the house that if you had a dad there, they would take

55:42

care of it. So they're just explaining to

55:44

you how to handle shit if

55:47

you have a house or you're doing house-like stuff.

55:49

That's so funny, because in my house, I do all that

55:51

stuff. I put together every piece

55:53

of furniture. I do all

55:55

of the handiwork. And if I can't handle

55:58

it, I call a man who I know.

55:59

I just called him today. There's

56:02

a guy on YouTube that I follow, and

56:05

I don't follow a lot of people, but he goes into character

56:08

where he's actually acting like your dad. And

56:10

I know that sounds strange, basically. All right, sweetie, I'll see you

56:13

next time. Like, he's

56:15

a genuine person. And he's

56:17

catering to the fact that he realized a lot

56:19

of the people that watch his videos don't have parents,

56:22

or they've mentioned that, or they didn't

56:24

have anyone to teach him those things.

56:27

And he's really leaning into that. And it's

56:29

called the, how

56:32

do you do it, dad, or something. It's

56:34

probably a better name than that. Not much better.

56:37

And it's great. I watch

56:39

it, and my dad did show me stuff, but

56:41

he's not always in my living room. Right.

56:43

There's also a guy on that my sister

56:46

showed me on TikTok that's your

56:48

nice Korean, your supportive Korean dad. And it's

56:51

this guy that's like, I'm really proud of you. It

56:53

literally makes me choke up when I think about it, because

56:56

it's like people need that, and the stuff

56:59

that he says, he just, he kind of goes

57:01

by like, either what's happening in the news,

57:03

or whatever. And

57:05

in this way that is so believable,

57:08

it's not like he's not, you know, trying to

57:10

be an influencer. He's like, I'm

57:13

trying to help people that need this kind of support

57:15

and have never gotten it. Yeah. It's so

57:17

lovely. It's so nice. I know.

57:20

God, maybe the internet's not a full

57:22

cesspool. I mean, I don't think it is in

57:24

some ways. Yeah. Are

57:26

you guys on threads?

57:28

No. No. Today's the

57:30

day threads came out. Wait, didn't people already hate

57:32

it? They like started it. It's like

57:34

a nightmare. Well, like I logged into it and

57:36

was like, oh, okay, I'll just like log in and see what

57:38

it is, or whatever, because it's so easy to just download, and

57:41

it connects to your Instagram right away, and it follows all the same people,

57:44

and it's like, it's very easy. And

57:46

then I realized I had to confirm every

57:49

single person that friend requested me, and because

57:52

everybody's doing it automatically, it was

57:54

hundreds of people that I had to auto-confer. Halfway

57:56

through the day, that went away, so obviously

57:58

they're making fixes. But

58:00

someone also told me that if you quit it, your

58:02

Instagram account gets deleted too. Which

58:05

people are furious about.

58:06

Wait, what is threads? I don't know. Oh,

58:09

it's literally Instagram's Twitter. Like

58:11

Instagram is starting a new thing to try

58:13

to get people. Instead of Instagram,

58:16

just like how it's all pictures, this is going to

58:18

be just like Twitter, but through

58:20

your Instagram.

58:20

I thought threads would be first spelled

58:23

with a Z. No. No. So you just

58:25

have to show pictures of your new

58:27

outfits. No. And it's like if you're

58:29

verified on Instagram, you're verified on threads,

58:31

it's all connected. But

58:34

I'm just, I think I'm just hanging on

58:36

for, I'm looking for any place that

58:39

I can once in a while put a thought

58:41

that's not Twitter anymore. Because I just,

58:45

I mean, Karen, you're one of my favorite follows

58:47

on Twitter. Do you not find it so horrible in

58:49

there now? Or what? Thank you. It is the worst.

58:52

It is like the verified people are at the

58:54

top and they're the people that are paying.

58:56

And they're the worst. And they're the worst.

58:58

Mostly Nazis. Yeah. And people that are like,

59:01

yeah, there's all kinds of suggestions.

59:03

Alt kind. Of people that, alt

59:05

kind. Of people, wait, am I going

59:07

in the wrong way? Are you going to the drive-thru? Yeah. This

59:10

is it. This is right. Oh, yeah. Jared

59:12

got to a car accident coming out of this place once. No.

59:15

Oh, yeah, don't worry. We just handled it after

59:17

two years. It's been finally behind us.

59:19

The exit was on the

59:22

right side. And that fireman

59:24

would have loved this. Or someone from England.

59:27

It's all backwards. Yeah, it is backwards.

59:29

Let's all get Starbucks drinks. Yes. And

59:31

this will be recorded. So order wisely.

59:35

Can I get an

59:37

ice? Sorry, a grande

59:40

iced latte. And then

59:43

also a couple others. I'd like a

59:45

grande iced coffee with a little

59:47

almond milk. And that's going to be

59:49

it. That concludes

59:52

the order. Yeah, I'm like one of those freaks

59:54

that doesn't drink coffee. I know. Why?

59:57

Because you don't like giving yourself anxiety.

59:59

No, I don't. I just honestly, I don't like the taste.

1:00:01

And I never start, I just never start. I had one tiny

1:00:04

little cup of it in Italy one time. And

1:00:06

I was like, what are we doing tonight? Guys,

1:00:08

we made a plan like that. And I was like, I don't really

1:00:11

need coffee. But you

1:00:13

know, they have things like lemonade and stuff. Oh, sure.

1:00:15

Oh, sure. But I got a water bottle. I got an exactly right

1:00:17

water bottle. Oh, that's right. And with my water staying

1:00:19

cool in this all day, I don't need any

1:00:22

other beverages. Merry Christmas.

1:00:24

Now, I'm very happy that you're actually using

1:00:26

that. Because sometimes those are,

1:00:28

you know, everybody has their own

1:00:30

specific like size or shape. I

1:00:32

love this one. We were really worried about it. Oh, because it's big?

1:00:34

I love this one. Yeah, I use it. Because it's so big,

1:00:36

because I hate refilling over and over again. It

1:00:39

doesn't fit in the cup holders, but I just put it on the

1:00:41

seat next to me. Right. So it's not a big deal. Yeah.

1:00:43

Put the seat belt around it. Yeah. And

1:00:46

I treat it like a little baby. I put it between my

1:00:48

legs, because it's so wide, it helps with my dysplasia.

1:00:52

I find that because it's so large, I

1:00:55

will never leave it anywhere.

1:00:56

Wait, do you have hip dysplasia? No,

1:00:58

but I do have a false hip, a fake hip,

1:01:01

a cobalt. Oh, that's right. And I'm supposed to get the

1:01:03

other one done. Because hip dysplasia,

1:01:05

I always think, is a baby thing. Like,

1:01:07

I've known a couple of people who've had babies with hip dysplasia,

1:01:10

and they put them in these harnesses where their legs

1:01:12

are just constantly spread eagles. Right.

1:01:14

And it's so hilarious, just tiny babies

1:01:17

with their little legs like wide open. Yeah,

1:01:19

I don't

1:01:19

know. It's just a word I

1:01:21

like to say, like corrugated

1:01:24

or galvanized. I say dysplasia

1:01:26

a lot. Dysplasia. I usually miss using

1:01:28

it. Sounds like I was using it correctly. I

1:01:31

like to widen my hips.

1:01:32

You

1:01:34

got it. Yeah. Wide,

1:01:37

wide birthing hips that I'll never

1:01:39

get to use. Trust

1:01:42

me, it's overrated. Speaking

1:01:46

as a mother. Yeah.

1:01:47

Jared got a vasectomy a couple

1:01:50

of weeks ago. Six weeks ago.

1:01:52

Yeah. And he just complained

1:01:55

for so many days. And

1:01:57

I was like, this is just not that big of

1:01:59

a thing.

1:01:59

of a deal. Yeah, I had to 9 pound.

1:02:04

They were over 9 pounds they were 9

1:02:07

3 season and I was just I don't I

1:02:09

don't

1:02:10

I don't want to

1:02:12

hear it. Yeah, I just was like you

1:02:14

know because when they had like it's

1:02:17

not comfortable, but it's not

1:02:18

painful, it's just annoying you know

1:02:21

right like I think it's like I wish

1:02:24

this wasn't happening kind of like you know.

1:02:26

Now that's why I think

1:02:28

it's been proven women have a higher pain

1:02:31

tolerance. Yeah, I have to I'm

1:02:33

not saying now. I'll be honest when

1:02:35

I had number one I wanted to quit halfway

1:02:38

through. I thought my doctor we got to stop

1:02:40

you can't really do that I can see the head

1:02:43

I was like. No and

1:02:45

then the second one, I mean they are really

1:02:47

they really do just pop out after

1:02:49

that first one. So that

1:02:51

wasn't that hard.

1:02:53

I should have offered to give you cash.

1:02:56

Just to offer me thank you did

1:02:58

you get an extra water.

1:03:00

Well that might not be our water. Maybe

1:03:02

it's on our water. This

1:03:04

might not be ours, nobody ordered a water. It

1:03:06

does look refreshing. We

1:03:10

don't want to be offended. It

1:03:12

was probably something we said. This

1:03:16

is weird. This is not how it

1:03:18

should go. I thought you meant that happened those cargo

1:03:21

short. No

1:03:23

just the in and out are switched like

1:03:25

they exactly all that's

1:03:27

weird. Yeah, that's not how Jared

1:03:29

got to the car. Okay, good.

1:03:31

He was pulling out here and it was

1:03:33

like stop traffic and he he tried to take a left

1:03:36

and he went into and the people coming on the

1:03:38

other side when

1:03:39

it was his fault. Has he ever been in

1:03:42

a car accident before. I mean

1:03:44

he's been like 2 since then but they weren't his fault

1:03:46

that one was his fault. Yeah, my

1:03:48

car has many dents on it and

1:03:51

so people maybe think that it's me but I've

1:03:53

never been in the car when they happened.

1:03:54

Oh really your car just gets walloped

1:03:57

a lot while it's on the street. It's been

1:03:59

it's received. many wallopings. Even

1:04:02

in my garage, when it rained a lot,

1:04:04

part of the ceiling fell on the back of my...

1:04:06

Oh my, your car can't catch a brake. No,

1:04:09

it can't. It can just catch some drywall.

1:04:12

It's dented and it's not

1:04:14

my fault. I've never

1:04:16

been in a wreck while operating a motor

1:04:18

vehicle. That's crazy.

1:04:21

I just wanted a brag. That's a good brag.

1:04:24

It's ironic though that you're not driving an IM

1:04:26

because I have been in,

1:04:28

I think, three or four

1:04:30

car accidents, all my

1:04:32

fault. The first two,

1:04:35

or maybe all three,

1:04:38

it was college age. I just

1:04:40

love to drive fast. I would

1:04:43

speed and it would be raining and then I would

1:04:45

go to slam on the brakes and just slide into the back

1:04:47

of cars. I did that a couple

1:04:50

times. I don't want to get on the 110.

1:04:52

Oh no, get out of here. Get out of here. Get

1:04:55

out of this area. Well,

1:04:56

you just maybe got that. I've

1:04:58

always driven, my friends made fun of me because I

1:05:01

had the seat all the way up and I rest

1:05:03

my chin on the steering wheel, baby. I'm like a

1:05:05

strange,

1:05:07

I drive in fear and so of course I've

1:05:09

never been in a wreck. But see, Jared drives

1:05:11

really very

1:05:14

cautiously and I'm very aggressive and he's

1:05:16

gotten into more accidents than I have. Because he's doing

1:05:18

things like trying to take a left out of that Starbucks

1:05:21

where it's like, no, don't do that. Just don't

1:05:23

take a left across four lanes and then

1:05:25

a right.

1:05:27

I mean, I don't mean to be so harsh to Jared. I think

1:05:29

that we should just call this episode to Jared.

1:05:31

Stop complaining

1:05:34

about traffic. Stop complaining about your

1:05:36

vasectomy. We're sick of hearing about your vasectomy.

1:05:38

I'm sick of hearing about your vasectomy. Sorry to keep bringing him up.

1:05:41

Jesus, I got to get out of the house more. All

1:05:43

I have are my husband and kids. You

1:05:46

need to get over to that skate park and you need to make

1:05:48

a few friends. I need to meet some fat pals

1:05:50

and learn how to ollie.

1:05:51

The next time I'm there, I'm going to say

1:05:53

hello. Yeah, come knock on my door. I

1:05:56

will. My kids love to watch those guys

1:05:58

skateboard and stuff. I love it. And

1:06:01

they're always nice and. Every little kid

1:06:03

seems to be somewhat interested in

1:06:05

a skateboard. Oh yeah. It's

1:06:07

great. It feels like a tiny little car that they can

1:06:10

drive. Yeah. I think yeah,

1:06:12

it's just like any kid's gonna be like, wow, there's

1:06:14

a grown man that still plays with a

1:06:16

toy. Mm-hmm. Interesting.

1:06:19

It seems to be part of his lifestyle.

1:06:22

I must be very heartening. It's like, oh, it doesn't,

1:06:24

it's not all shit after age 17 or whatever.

1:06:28

That's what your children are thinking. Yeah.

1:06:32

Yeah, they're thinking about mortality

1:06:34

and when they're gonna lose their

1:06:35

ability to do the things they love. The

1:06:38

first thing I, my first words were, when do I

1:06:40

have to start paying taxes?

1:06:42

Oh, when's that start? Have

1:06:46

you been doing sets lately? Great

1:06:49

question, Karen. I

1:06:52

find, much like on this podcast,

1:06:54

that my material

1:06:57

is only about my children and Jim

1:06:59

Gaffigan's allowed to do that, but I'm not. You

1:07:02

know?

1:07:02

Oh no, I think you're allowed

1:07:04

to. No, I know.

1:07:06

I have a good, I do

1:07:09

some sets here and there where I get booked, but

1:07:11

I'm not out there hustling,

1:07:14

trying to put together a new half, you

1:07:16

know what I mean? Like I'm kind of, I write down

1:07:18

joke ideas. I rarely sit and

1:07:20

try to like put things together, but I have my

1:07:22

show on Wednesdays. Chris comes

1:07:24

to do it. Yeah, nice. Where

1:07:27

is that at? It's at Barbandini

1:07:29

Echo Park. I wanna come to that.

1:07:31

Is the best. Oh, you should come. It's

1:07:33

so great. It's just like a natural

1:07:34

wine bar, but they also have beer

1:07:36

and non-alcoholic stuff, but they, I say

1:07:40

that just because to say, it's not a full bar. And

1:07:44

the guy that

1:07:46

owns it is Josh Weinstein, who

1:07:48

used to run the Josh and Josh show forever, and so

1:07:50

it's so perfect. He never

1:07:53

tries to dick us over. He's never like, oh,

1:07:55

you're canceled because this corporate Christmas

1:07:57

party is coming in this week or whatever.

1:07:59

He gets it. He gets it. He like, we're

1:08:02

like, we need heaters. He got us like the

1:08:04

chicest heaters. I know that sounds

1:08:06

insane, but he got us these heaters that

1:08:08

are like attached to the wall and like warm

1:08:11

the whole area. We did a show year

1:08:13

round outside and yeah,

1:08:15

we had it last night.

1:08:17

It was great packed. Everybody wanted to

1:08:20

keep the 4th of July vibes

1:08:22

going. And you

1:08:24

did it last night. Who did it last night? Well,

1:08:27

Kate Berlant was featured, was on

1:08:30

the lineup, but then had to cancel truly an

1:08:32

hour

1:08:32

before the show because she was sick. And so

1:08:34

a lot of people showed up for her, I think, but also

1:08:37

Hannah Einbinder was there. Jenny

1:08:40

Zagrino, who's very, very funny. Nate

1:08:42

Fernald, I believe is a friend of yours.

1:08:45

Yeah, he's been on the. And

1:08:47

a couple of newer guys that

1:08:49

are so funny. Spencer Terribiard, who was

1:08:51

so funny, and Cody Wilkins, we had

1:08:53

a great lineup last night. Kate will be back

1:08:55

on the 26th. Nice, nice. I

1:08:58

was like, you know, it's like one of those things where

1:09:00

you know all these people came to see one person. Or no,

1:09:02

I think they came to see Hannah too. Hannah's a huge star. They

1:09:04

came to see a lot of people. But a lot of people

1:09:06

I think came because Kate isn't in LA that much

1:09:09

as much anymore. And, you know,

1:09:11

to see her for free, do stand

1:09:13

up, obviously fun. But you're like, when

1:09:15

do I announce that? Do I

1:09:17

say it up top where people will leave? Do

1:09:19

I say it after I take donations because

1:09:21

it's a donation space show? But

1:09:24

we actually had Andrew Dizmukes come on. He's

1:09:26

on SNL right now. And he absolutely

1:09:30

burned the place down. He was so good. So

1:09:32

it was a great, you know, replacement.

1:09:34

He was like the funniest person

1:09:36

in Austin, a winner. I

1:09:39

got it, no three. I'm not here to brag.

1:09:41

Oh, oh. I think that he was

1:09:43

sort of scouted from

1:09:46

winning that contest now. Really? I

1:09:48

think he won out of Austin. Or

1:09:50

and then ended up on SNL.

1:09:52

I don't know him, but.

1:09:54

He did, he's so funny.

1:09:56

Like he did really, really great. Yeah, everyone in

1:09:59

Austin.

1:09:59

speaks very highly of him.

1:10:01

I feel like that here,

1:10:03

I want this question to be answered in this car,

1:10:06

which is, when do you make that announcement? And I

1:10:08

would say, if I was Kara

1:10:10

Clank in that situation, I would

1:10:12

wait until the second to last person.

1:10:15

That's exactly when I did it, Karen. Girl, last year.

1:10:17

That's exactly when I fucking did it. Because

1:10:19

you knew Nate Fernald was going to kill. Yeah. You

1:10:22

knew Hannah Einbinder was going to kill. You

1:10:24

knew there was a celebrity element. You were going to

1:10:26

be giving them things. If you tell them up front,

1:10:29

you're not going to get the one thing you think you

1:10:31

want. Then they're going to have a set

1:10:33

idea. Yeah. Or they're going to sit there kind of

1:10:35

disappointed the whole time. You tricked me and

1:10:37

brought me here. And so right before, and

1:10:39

I told Andrew I was doing it, but I go, hey, I'm

1:10:41

going to tell them that Kate isn't coming

1:10:43

right before you. But

1:10:45

you can just make fun of it and be like, and

1:10:48

he was like, no problem at all. And he did that,

1:10:50

and he was so funny. But I was like, hey, guys,

1:10:52

so I know you all are

1:10:54

expecting Kate. But she is. There

1:10:57

wasn't like a, aw. They were

1:10:59

just like, OK, she's sick. It's

1:11:02

like post-COVID too.

1:11:03

People aren't forcing themselves

1:11:05

to go out when they have a sore throat. Yes, they shouldn't.

1:11:07

They're like, I just don't feel like it's responsible.

1:11:10

So you know. Percically

1:11:12

handled. Yeah. And they were all good. And I said, and

1:11:15

because she had also rescheduled. I go, she'll

1:11:17

be back in two weeks. Come see us. Blah,

1:11:19

blah, blah. Or

1:11:19

maybe it's three weeks. But you know what I mean. Yeah. Yeah,

1:11:22

my instincts are always off because I would think

1:11:24

you'd want to announce before the show

1:11:26

just

1:11:26

promoted. That's what my husband said. He

1:11:28

was my co-host. Like all these shows,

1:11:30

like the Don't Tell Show, or there

1:11:33

was some secret headliner show that

1:11:35

they used to do at the helium clubs. Yeah.

1:11:38

People are attracted to the fact that they don't

1:11:40

know who's going to be there. The element of surprise

1:11:42

is what attracts them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's

1:11:45

the time I did the show

1:11:47

at helium, though I could hear an audible like,

1:11:50

oh, I don't know who's. Like,

1:11:52

oh, this is set up to hurt my feelings.

1:11:54

It's so funny how far

1:11:57

people will go to to convince themselves

1:11:59

that you are. or somebody more famous than you

1:12:01

are. When I went and performed for

1:12:03

the troops overseas, I was like two

1:12:06

years into comedy, and these guys

1:12:08

were like,

1:12:09

oh, I've seen you on Saturday Night Live, and I

1:12:11

go, yep, you have. I

1:12:15

was like, you tell your friends at home, if that helps

1:12:17

you get through a better day here in Kuwait, then

1:12:19

you tell your friends you saw someone from SNL,

1:12:22

and you can't remember her name. Perfect.

1:12:25

But like, this is. Yeah,

1:12:28

the show is really fun on Wednesdays. It's

1:12:30

just very, the clientele

1:12:33

is very young. So, you

1:12:35

know, Jared and I get up there, and we banter

1:12:37

for like 15 minutes about, you know, whatever,

1:12:39

the news, our lives with our kids,

1:12:41

whatever, and we're always like, anyone have kids?

1:12:44

And it's like, correct your nose. And we've

1:12:46

never watched the news. They're like, on purpose? Like, nobody

1:12:49

has. You know, they like, they

1:12:51

don't even have a niece or a nephew, these people.

1:12:54

They are all very young little babies.

1:12:56

They're all very cool and hip and dressed

1:12:58

cool. Yeah,

1:13:01

it's always a good audience though. Yeah, they're

1:13:03

a great audience. And you have food, right? There's

1:13:06

always guests. The bar

1:13:08

doesn't have food, but they will have like pop-ups.

1:13:11

Like, yeah, burger pop-ups or whatever.

1:13:14

Dot-bot burgers. Dot-dot. Dot-dot.

1:13:16

I did the logo. You did?

1:13:19

Yeah. That's Mike Holmes. Yeah,

1:13:22

yeah. It's a little dog wearing

1:13:24

a hamburger,

1:13:25

a bottom bun with suspenders,

1:13:29

and then the lettuce and tomato

1:13:31

are on the dog's back. So I actually,

1:13:33

right now I'm realizing it's like,

1:13:36

ready for a human to eat a little dog.

1:13:38

Yeah. It's a, yeah,

1:13:40

but you know, it was cute enough that you

1:13:42

can get away with it. Yeah,

1:13:44

it's a little dog wearing a burger outfit. That's

1:13:46

precious. I also love that

1:13:48

bar. There

1:13:49

was some kind of after party type of thing,

1:13:52

and this was so long, pre-COVID, but I went

1:13:54

to that bar and I was just, I was very excited

1:13:56

because Josh

1:13:59

is such a...

1:13:59

nice person yeah and him and Josh

1:14:03

who did the Barlouba show show

1:14:05

Josh and Josh that's right. But they

1:14:07

were so like cool

1:14:11

and nice and made such a good show

1:14:13

yeah that people got to do for so long

1:14:15

that when I learned that was his

1:14:17

bar I was like all this is like

1:14:20

I just felt proud. Way

1:14:22

of like I this is a person that does

1:14:24

so much for other people and he

1:14:27

got he's still doing it. Now

1:14:29

he they're the best when they quit Josh and Josh

1:14:31

after 10 years they gave us the show and we

1:14:33

started our show called the better half comedy

1:14:35

me and Jared and then Lubitsch

1:14:38

started

1:14:39

fucking with us like what

1:14:41

I'm talking about like new managers came in

1:14:43

they didn't care about comedy they were like you

1:14:46

know you didn't bring in that many people this week but it's

1:14:48

like the last week we're packed to the gills like what are

1:14:50

you talking about you know, I mean like yeah, Josh

1:14:52

never cares about that kind of stuff like even though we

1:14:54

always like you know we have people like but

1:14:57

you know they were just like oh we've got a party next

1:14:59

week you can so we can have the show and

1:15:01

like we just were like you know what I think let's get out of

1:15:03

here and we were already moving to the East side so

1:15:06

going to Josh's place at Bandini was perfect.

1:15:09

I had my baby shower of bar Bandini. Yeah,

1:15:11

my baby shower for

1:15:13

Rosie was a bar Bandini because

1:15:16

Josh gave me like this great deal and

1:15:18

had let me do it there and at that he

1:15:20

was like I'd love to get this back patio set

1:15:22

up to do a show and everything and

1:15:24

with a finally did it

1:15:26

and you're like I was like waiting

1:15:28

for it got me in there. Yeah, so

1:15:31

it's great love it worked out. So

1:15:33

long ago made me realize I need

1:15:36

to have a seersucker suit at

1:15:38

that's very sharp dress guy

1:15:41

even the pants I have right now are kind of seersucker

1:15:43

they're very summer. Yes, yeah, let me see

1:15:46

lift up a light. Yeah,

1:15:48

I feel like I could be in a barbershop court.

1:15:52

Josh

1:15:58

and I are have. like parallel

1:16:00

lives. We are from

1:16:02

neighboring towns. We went to the same college.

1:16:05

My mother and his father

1:16:06

know each other through work. What? We

1:16:08

both went to the same study abroad program. I

1:16:11

lived in Rome. He's married to a Roman woman. He's

1:16:14

out in Rome. They now basically live in Rome. He

1:16:16

just comes back here like all the time.

1:16:19

That's cool. We just figured out that we have parallel

1:16:21

lives. And you didn't know that. And we didn't, we

1:16:23

found, we would find out that out like almost every

1:16:25

week. Every time I would do Barlubitch, we would find

1:16:27

out another thing about ourselves that was like, oh my God,

1:16:30

no way. And then his parents came to the show and

1:16:32

they were like, the dad's like, I know your mother. Like,

1:16:34

you know, it's like so insane. I

1:16:37

love that.

1:16:37

Yeah, he's the best. There's a guy

1:16:40

in LA that I don't know, but

1:16:42

he makes movies. He's written some,

1:16:45

none of them I can think of right now, but

1:16:47

he's doing well. And he

1:16:49

lived near me in my dorms in

1:16:52

Montana. Oh. So we just kind

1:16:54

of figured it out. Missoula and

1:16:56

then, you know, it's

1:16:58

interesting. That's amazing. It's such a small world.

1:17:00

It is, it is. It really is. You

1:17:03

know what they say. Yeah, that's what we all say.

1:17:07

It is small. And they're wrong. We're

1:17:09

all wrong. It's huge.

1:17:11

It's quite big and it's

1:17:13

covered in water. Right. And that

1:17:15

water has not been investigated in

1:17:17

any meaningful way. Oh my

1:17:19

God. Didn't you guys

1:17:21

feel like there was just like a collective

1:17:23

lack of stuff to talk about after the submersible

1:17:25

conversation was over? Right. I

1:17:27

made a, I was just like, I guess we're done. Yeah.

1:17:30

I can't even believe during. I can't talk anymore. Yeah. This

1:17:33

during this podcast, I made the off color submarine

1:17:35

comment. Immediately you heard my

1:17:37

voice get high. I felt very unsure of my voice.

1:17:40

I just didn't say anything. I just

1:17:41

let him dangle. I had

1:17:43

a tweet advertised to me

1:17:46

two days ago that was like wondering where to go

1:17:48

this summer. The Titanic museum

1:17:50

and was like,

1:17:52

give it a beat. Yeah. We

1:17:55

need to just take the gas off

1:17:57

the Titanic obsession for two minutes. Right.

1:17:59

Sorry, I mean, going

1:18:02

to the museum would be cool, but like, the

1:18:04

idea that people wanted to go down

1:18:07

where it, like, ended up

1:18:09

is so, like, what's the plus there?

1:18:12

I would never, you know what I would do? Stand

1:18:15

on dry land and watch a drone go down

1:18:17

there and watch it on an iPad. Right, right. Would

1:18:19

love that. Take me down a little, like, a little

1:18:21

drone that's not going to implode or kill anybody. Yeah.

1:18:25

Show me what the wreckage looks like, I guess. I guess? I'm

1:18:27

not even that interested in that, to be honest. Yeah, I

1:18:30

just

1:18:30

want to see footage of the fish that are down. I

1:18:32

want to see some glow in the dark fish with

1:18:34

a horn on their head, you know. And I heard

1:18:36

that the people that were on that

1:18:38

thing were not looking out windows. They

1:18:41

were looking at a laptop

1:18:43

to see that wreckage. You're

1:18:45

kidding. I swear to God. Really?

1:18:48

So because the thing can't have windows. Yes,

1:18:51

exactly. They didn't know how to make

1:18:53

windows. Well, they are for the fear

1:18:55

of what actually happened. For the fear of what happened. Yeah,

1:18:58

because I think no glass could probably

1:19:01

withstand that pressure. Right. Oh,

1:19:03

my lord. Anyway, it's so bad. So imagining

1:19:06

it's so scary. So bad. It's so

1:19:08

scary. I'm already close to it. But it's

1:19:10

so funny. Don't you think it mirrors how obsessed

1:19:12

people are with the Titanic, how obsessed we were

1:19:15

with the submersible?

1:19:17

Yes. There have been a

1:19:19

million plane crashes. There have been so many

1:19:21

mass casualty events

1:19:23

in this country. The way we

1:19:26

are obsessed with that Titanic.

1:19:29

Right. And I think we have

1:19:31

to look at Leonardo DiCaprio and say, hey. We

1:19:33

have to pin that on him. You have a real piece of this, sir.

1:19:36

Kate Winslet, yes. But I think Leo,

1:19:38

really, it's on him. It's

1:19:40

like, are people down there trying to find the heart

1:19:43

from the old lady? Is that part

1:19:45

real? Yeah, that medallion. They're

1:19:47

like, if I could just find that sapphire, I wouldn't

1:19:49

be able to pay my rent. Jewels. It's a

1:19:52

beautiful locket. But

1:19:54

also, didn't James Cameron do

1:19:56

a thing where he, they sent cameras into

1:19:58

the rest?

1:19:59

He's gone down. down there. Right. I think

1:20:01

he's done like a submersible trip not with the same

1:20:03

guy but I think he has done that yeah down

1:20:06

with a way better summer. Yeah. The

1:20:09

yeah. I think it was

1:20:11

so much tension because everybody

1:20:13

people are like oh I hate that or I have

1:20:15

claustrophobia it's like

1:20:17

no one wouldn't have claustrophobia in

1:20:19

that situation like we're talking

1:20:21

about absolute human peril

1:20:23

and so the idea that then

1:20:26

after the fact people are like it's so wrong that people

1:20:28

are making jokes it's like no no that's

1:20:30

what people do yeah and shit like this

1:20:32

right now because you're all you can do is go what

1:20:35

if it was me yeah,

1:20:37

freak out yeah that was the most when

1:20:40

one time when I was in band I went

1:20:42

for launching in this claim

1:20:44

like way down you crawl way

1:20:47

down and at one point the crawl

1:20:49

space.

1:20:50

I was stuck like my hips I had

1:20:52

to like position my body because of

1:20:55

your display person in front. Yeah, so

1:20:58

I open up my hip much like Mel

1:21:00

Gibson had to and

1:21:02

pop it out of socket so I could slit

1:21:04

their throat. No I just I was stuck for

1:21:06

a minute and that was my first thought is

1:21:08

I'm going to be so embarrassed if this is

1:21:11

the way I go yeah, I'm like people

1:21:13

are no one's going to be bad

1:21:15

for my heart that's making my heart. It was

1:21:17

very about being in a spelunking

1:21:19

stuck situation. Then moments later

1:21:22

it opened up into this room and I could

1:21:24

stand and you could look out of these like

1:21:27

way up and see these openings in

1:21:29

the ceiling of this cave and it was

1:21:32

so worth worth I mean okay, the

1:21:34

payoff I felt so good but yes,

1:21:36

it's not something I would do now

1:21:37

when you went back through was there a problem.

1:21:41

No you went through you went out a

1:21:43

different way that you didn't turn around and go back

1:21:45

out. Yeah, it

1:21:47

was and yes, I was strong middle

1:21:50

of the day I there's no way I could have done that

1:21:52

sober and I knew it you did trunks

1:21:54

belong. Yes, yes, it's a way

1:21:57

that a lot of the guys do it from.

1:21:58

I'm just for drunkling

1:22:01

is the way. Yeah. Did

1:22:06

you ever see that movie? Is

1:22:08

it the cave, the climb where it's the three women

1:22:11

doing it, but then there's things killing them

1:22:14

as they're down there. I know what movie you're talking about, but

1:22:16

I didn't watch it. The Ascent, the

1:22:18

Descent. Descent. The Descent

1:22:21

was on the way out. That was at the end of the movie.

1:22:24

But that's my, I would not be able to stop

1:22:26

obsessing over. There's a thing that lives

1:22:28

down here that no one knows exists that

1:22:30

is absolutely going to kill us and no

1:22:32

one will know or care.

1:22:35

Like that idea that they're just a whistle, like

1:22:37

a,

1:22:38

it looked like a hairless

1:22:40

cat. Sure, okay, sure. Whatever you

1:22:42

want to do. Go ahead, sir. Yeah, he's a mariner.

1:22:44

He's got to be somewhere, guys. Get up

1:22:47

to that red light. Absolutely.

1:22:49

But that idea

1:22:51

seems possible to me and therefore,

1:22:54

how could you open yourself up to that level

1:22:56

of cave monster? No

1:22:59

one's on my side with this? No. I

1:23:02

completely, I just, it wouldn't even cross

1:23:04

my mind. Like I don't even go that

1:23:06

much. Oh yeah. Like,

1:23:09

I mean, you're saying that's the worst part.

1:23:12

Like the worst part is that no one would know.

1:23:14

Or just that the

1:23:16

worst part would be seeing an animal

1:23:20

thing that lives in

1:23:22

there that no one knows is there because no one goes in

1:23:24

there. Yeah. I

1:23:26

don't need to be the first to do anything.

1:23:28

I was scared mostly of just sudden

1:23:31

water rushing in. That was, that became

1:23:33

my

1:23:33

biggest fear more than it was. Like the little boys on

1:23:35

the team. Yeah, yeah. That's horrible.

1:23:38

That's a good documentary. When Karen

1:23:40

first mentioned the movie with the descent,

1:23:42

I thought, yeah, they all go down there to save

1:23:44

that soccer team. Oh wait,

1:23:47

I'm confusing two things.

1:23:48

That was Elon Musk that saved the soccer

1:23:50

team. No, it wasn't. I mean, we should have known

1:23:52

it. Over promise,

1:23:56

under delivery, and then he accused

1:23:58

the actual hero. of like

1:24:01

being a groomer or something disgusting. We're

1:24:03

just like, sir, step

1:24:05

out. Yeah, and I'm right now realizing

1:24:08

my fear was so real because

1:24:11

at the end of it, they were saying, now

1:24:13

look at your clothes, there isn't any dirt on them

1:24:15

because the water washes it all away

1:24:17

when it goes, rushes through there. I was

1:24:20

actually

1:24:21

spur-lunking through a waterway. And

1:24:23

you didn't realize? There was zero,

1:24:26

not a, I was crawling

1:24:28

on the ground and there was no dirt on my clothes.

1:24:31

And I found that fascinating. But

1:24:33

sorry, you didn't

1:24:35

know there was water? Apology accepted.

1:24:38

It was not. No,

1:24:40

I didn't until the end. And then

1:24:42

I was like, well, wait, how do we know it wasn't

1:24:44

gonna come through? Cause it's not June

1:24:47

or something. Like it seasonally rushes

1:24:49

through that. I need more

1:24:52

hard evidence that I wasn't about to.

1:24:54

But why didn't you know? No one

1:24:56

told me until it was over. Water

1:24:59

is a very specific sensation. It's

1:25:01

different than being dry. Oh no,

1:25:03

I was not. There was no water when I did it. There

1:25:06

was little trickles and puddles here

1:25:08

and there. But your clothes were clean. Yes. How?

1:25:12

I know. Is what I'm saying. It was the

1:25:14

biggest mystery ever. I'm still, it's still

1:25:16

mystery. I know it's, it sounds

1:25:18

like I'm making it up.

1:25:19

So were they saying to you,

1:25:22

like there's enough water happening that you

1:25:24

don't notice it, but it's washing your clothes?

1:25:26

Oh, I'm sorry. At

1:25:28

one point water rushed through and got rid of all

1:25:31

the dirt. Got it. And then cut

1:25:33

to several months later.

1:25:34

Okay, do you have, we forgot that we didn't get the

1:25:36

spin cycle. Yes, yes. The quick

1:25:38

rinse that you did. I was, yeah. I

1:25:41

went through well, everything was being line dried.

1:25:43

Got you. There was no water

1:25:46

rushing through. But my fear

1:25:48

was when they said, hey, look at your

1:25:50

clothes, aren't they clean? That's cause of all

1:25:52

the water. And I'm like, what, what now? Yeah.

1:25:55

Like that's when I got scared, but it was after the fact.

1:25:58

Okay. Yes.

1:25:59

It was confusing and I shouldn't have even brought

1:26:02

it up. Look, no, you just confirmed fuck

1:26:04

off caving for lunking of any kind.

1:26:07

I don't need it, I don't want it. No, I don't

1:26:09

want any of that.

1:26:10

I can't. It was fun, I'm telling you.

1:26:13

No, I like roller coasters. That's about as

1:26:15

daredevil as I get. And did you guys

1:26:18

hear about how my cell phone fell out of my pocket

1:26:20

on a roller coaster recently? No! A

1:26:23

pretty new cell phone fell out of my

1:26:25

pocket on the X2 at Magic Mountain,

1:26:27

which is a banger of a roller coaster.

1:26:30

It is really good and it turns you all around.

1:26:32

And it was in my pocket and I think

1:26:34

I just forgot to zip the pocket and it sucked

1:26:36

out. I didn't even notice it. We were

1:26:39

off the ride. We were

1:26:41

several steps away from the ride before I went, oh,

1:26:44

oh my phone, where's my phone? It's just like

1:26:46

dozens of other phones. So

1:26:48

I immediately go file a report. I'm

1:26:51

like bummed out, but my brother and I try to enjoy the

1:26:53

rest of the day doing coasters because

1:26:55

we're coaster heads and he's visiting from out of town. So

1:26:58

we do that. I mean, it literally turned into

1:27:00

the worst day. It started raining. We got kicked off

1:27:02

of like the coaster. At one point we were stuck on

1:27:04

a coaster for 15 minutes where it just let us dangle

1:27:07

there. Like it was- Upside down? No,

1:27:09

no, right side up. But still, like it was

1:27:11

just like, are we gonna get out? Like we just

1:27:13

couldn't believe how much bad luck we were having. Then

1:27:16

pouring rain, lightning. So they obviously shot

1:27:18

all the rides. So we go home, I track

1:27:20

it. I do close up satellite.

1:27:22

It's right under the roller coaster. So I go, guys,

1:27:25

here's a picture of it. Zoomed in as far as

1:27:27

it can go. It's right under the roller coaster. Go

1:27:29

out there and get it. I call for weeks.

1:27:32

I'm calling. I finally tweet. Somebody

1:27:34

gets in touch with me and goes,

1:27:35

please write to our VIP

1:27:37

email address. I'm like, great. So

1:27:40

finally, I find my iPhone

1:27:42

pings.

1:27:44

Six weeks later and it's in

1:27:46

Hong Kong. My phone is

1:27:48

in Hong Kong. What? Because- Hey,

1:27:50

wait a minute. Clearly the like teens

1:27:53

that work at Magic Mountain like found

1:27:55

it and were like, oh, the screen didn't crack. This

1:27:57

is probably a pretty decent phone, but-

1:27:59

It's bricked because I've put it into lost

1:28:02

mode and everything. So they're like, we'll

1:28:04

resell it to wherever. And I

1:28:06

went on Reddit. The first thing I found on

1:28:08

Reddit was, their phone was at the exact

1:28:11

place my phone was at. And that phone had been stolen in

1:28:13

London. So you found some under

1:28:15

ground. Yeah,

1:28:16

pipeline. A Magic Mountain, a

1:28:19

Six Flags to Hong Kong pipeline.

1:28:22

And what they said on Reddit was that these phones

1:28:24

are probably getting stripped and reprogrammed

1:28:26

to be sold as burners in the Philippines or something.

1:28:28

I have no idea if

1:28:30

any of that's true. This is just Reddit I'm quoting

1:28:32

as my source here. And so I tweet

1:28:34

and go, hey, Six Flags, why didn't you just

1:28:37

tell me that you were going to sell my phone

1:28:39

to Hong Kong or whatever? I tweet

1:28:41

some bitchy things. And

1:28:44

I start getting phone calls now for Six Flags.

1:28:47

I'm still playing phone tag with Six Flags

1:28:49

to this day. And I'm hoping to get Bianca

1:28:51

on the line very soon. Because I would

1:28:53

love to get some reimbursement for

1:28:55

the brand new phone I had to buy. How

1:28:58

long ago did this happen? At the

1:29:00

very March 31. And

1:29:02

then it came

1:29:03

back on the very beginning of May.

1:29:05

And I was like, what the hell? And then I ended

1:29:08

up breaking down and just buying a new phone because I'd been using

1:29:10

my friend's old ass phone and wasn't

1:29:12

holding a charge. And I

1:29:15

was starting to feel like my journey wasn't

1:29:18

going to happen. Then once it pinged in Hong Kong, I

1:29:20

go, OK, it's really dead. I'm going to buy a new

1:29:22

phone. It's all in part. And then

1:29:24

that little thing that

1:29:26

pinged it is probably sitting in a pile. But

1:29:28

I just couldn't believe it.

1:29:31

They're so expensive.

1:29:33

It's so much money. And I didn't have

1:29:35

the insurance for the law. I have the insurance

1:29:37

for breaking it because I'm a dumbass. But I didn't have the

1:29:39

insurance for losing it because I'd never really lost

1:29:42

it before. Yeah. So

1:29:44

you know. That's just bad news. A sad

1:29:46

story. But I am hoping once I

1:29:48

get Bianca on the line, we're going to talk it out. Bianca,

1:29:51

if you're a diner sore. Yeah.

1:29:54

I don't know what the listeners

1:29:55

are called. We made a joke about

1:29:57

that one time. But yeah. And

1:30:00

it's stuck. Yeah, I think it's stuck. Well, I just

1:30:02

said, I go, any idea how my phone

1:30:04

got from an employees-only access

1:30:07

area to Hong Kong? Yeah. Like,

1:30:09

it's not like other riders were

1:30:12

down there under the coaster chilling and

1:30:14

found my phone, you know? Right. So

1:30:16

I was... She's gonna call you and say, I hate to break

1:30:18

it to you, but many times

1:30:20

there's a criminal element with our carnival

1:30:23

workers. Yeah. Well, it's so funny.

1:30:26

Everybody that works

1:30:26

there is like 17 and bored out of their minds.

1:30:29

It's really... And they must know. That's

1:30:31

like people doing that and then

1:30:34

they're not... The park is like, it's unsafe

1:30:37

to go down there or whatever, right? Yeah. And

1:30:40

then that's that. Then it's just like, well, you...

1:30:43

It's all on you and I'm sure the average person can

1:30:45

get shamed into, it's

1:30:47

your fault. Yeah. Not

1:30:49

our girl. Not me. Not me.

1:30:52

That X2 sucks it out of my pocket. We are... Even

1:30:54

if you aren't the guest, we need to have an update

1:30:57

on this phone. Oh, yeah. Yes, please.

1:30:59

I'll lady a voice note, but I'm only trading it

1:31:01

for the one from Karen's dad. That's

1:31:03

right. So I will hold my voice note hostage

1:31:06

until I get that one. We

1:31:09

just passed the playground where I was gonna have you

1:31:11

guys pick me up before. The

1:31:13

snake park, as we call it, because there

1:31:15

is a slide shaped like a snake. Oh.

1:31:19

Not because there's like a tons of snakes. That would be

1:31:21

weird. Thank God. You're like,

1:31:23

come on,

1:31:23

let's just go back and give Snake Park one more try. The kids love

1:31:25

it. This

1:31:28

is where my daughter's gonna be going to school in the fall.

1:31:30

Hey. This is her little elementary.

1:31:33

Oh, yeah. It's not just tiny

1:31:35

shoes, I think. Tiny picnic tables.

1:31:37

Yeah. They can't fit on a regular

1:31:39

picnic table. No. No, they're

1:31:41

not. They need adjustments. They're little. Yeah.

1:31:44

In skateboard videos

1:31:46

growing up, I thought that everyone was

1:31:49

way better than they are because they were doing like

1:31:51

kick flips over picnic tables. And then you move

1:31:53

here and you realize, oh, these are tiny little picnic tables. These

1:31:56

are baby

1:31:56

picnic tables. Everyone's been lying

1:31:58

to me. They're for babies. Oh,

1:32:01

babies at a picnic. So,

1:32:04

is there anything you'd like to promote? What a

1:32:07

natural segue. Yes,

1:32:10

my podcast, That's

1:32:13

Messed Up, an SVU podcast, right

1:32:17

here on the Exactly Right Network. Please

1:32:20

listen if you like SVU, or even if you don't. A

1:32:22

lot of people listen to our show that don't watch

1:32:24

SVU, which I find wild, but go for

1:32:26

it.

1:32:27

I've never watched SVU. Yeah,

1:32:30

but a lot of people... We explain everything that happens in the episode,

1:32:33

so people are like, I don't really need to watch it, you're

1:32:35

telling me what's happening. Yes,

1:32:37

it's the best. So that's what we do. And you

1:32:39

guys get amazing bookings of people who

1:32:42

play different parts on the episodes you're talking about. Yeah, that's

1:32:44

one of the funnest parts. Yeah, we have an episode coming up where

1:32:48

we interviewed Matthew Lillard, which was so cool. That's a

1:32:50

great guest. Yeah,

1:32:53

we were so excited to get him, because he's in this wild episode

1:32:55

with Carol Burnett, and we were just

1:32:57

not going to get Carol Burnett. She's 90 and a legend.

1:33:00

I just didn't think we were going to get her. So I was

1:33:02

like, thank God we got Matthew Lillard. And

1:33:04

we are actually touring. Our

1:33:07

podcast is going on tour. We're

1:33:09

going to be doing 20 cities

1:33:12

in the fall from September

1:33:14

to December. So that's messeduplive.com

1:33:17

is where you can find out everything about our

1:33:19

podcast. Amazing. Thank you for allowing

1:33:22

me to promote myself. Of course. And

1:33:24

then, yeah, if you live in Los Angeles, come down to Bar

1:33:26

Bandini on Wednesdays. I gave that a nice little

1:33:29

20-minute plug. Yeah,

1:33:30

that was smart. But I also just

1:33:32

want you to come, Karen. I want to come. And

1:33:34

that's actually a great kind

1:33:36

of bridge from me always being in my

1:33:38

house to going back out or going

1:33:40

to a comedy show.

1:33:42

Yeah, because you can come on the side and sit with the comics

1:33:44

and stuff and talk to us. We should

1:33:46

have you on when somebody is on that you like.

1:33:49

Yeah. Or

1:33:50

a person that you are friendly with. Or

1:33:53

maybe it's a place you could do stand-up

1:33:55

again. That's an idea. Well,

1:33:57

I've offered. I don't want it to be thought

1:33:59

that way. that I have an offer. I like to plant the seed. If

1:34:02

I could get Karen Kilgareff, trust. I'm

1:34:04

just watering the seed, you plant it. Karen

1:34:06

Kilgareff, I'm just doing jokes

1:34:08

about my kids and my husband all the time. That's

1:34:11

my problem. Now, the last time I did

1:34:13

a set, Kara, it was like

1:34:16

a hot tub show or something. I fucking had

1:34:18

to follow James Fritch, which

1:34:21

God bless anyone who has to ever follow

1:34:23

James Fritch. He is so fucking

1:34:25

good at stand-up comedy. But also, I

1:34:27

hadn't written a new joke in ever. I

1:34:30

was just like, I kind of didn't believe my own

1:34:33

thing. I was just kind of like, and

1:34:36

then I was like, don't do it if this is the way

1:34:38

you're gonna do it. Right, I get that. That's

1:34:40

kind of how I feel right now. I think I'll

1:34:42

probably eventually start writing

1:34:45

more and coming up with more stuff. But

1:34:48

just coming out of pandemic and the two kids

1:34:50

being the age they are, I'm just like, my

1:34:53

brain is stretched at capacity. I just

1:34:55

can't sit and write jokes right now. It's just

1:34:57

too- Also,

1:34:58

being a mother is a job and you've

1:35:00

been doing that. Yes, you have. Yeah, it's

1:35:02

not like, it's not that

1:35:05

you're afraid your material will be about

1:35:07

that. Yeah, I can only

1:35:09

imagine since,

1:35:12

it's been years since I was in the daycare

1:35:14

business. Ha ha ha. Wait,

1:35:17

where? My house? I

1:35:19

could've sworn I knew how to get there. Yeah, yeah,

1:35:21

you just keep going up a couple more blocks. Are

1:35:23

you driving by my favorite picnic tables

1:35:25

again? Yeah, I just wanted to. I

1:35:28

wanted you to get another visual of yourself kick-flipping

1:35:30

my thing. I couldn't jump over that when I was young.

1:35:33

Straight ahead. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Alex

1:35:35

Cole lives right around here. You

1:35:38

know Alex Cole? Yes, of

1:35:40

the Bay Area. Yeah, because you're Bay

1:35:42

Area. It's also a family

1:35:44

name, I'm sure we're related. Cole's.

1:35:50

Ma'am. Ma'am. Ma'am,

1:35:52

can you please get off my side? I

1:35:55

follow this Highland Park Instagram,

1:35:58

where it's like,

1:35:59

It's clearly run by somebody who's

1:36:02

lived here for their whole life and hates the

1:36:04

gender fires and stuff. And they were complaining

1:36:06

about these things being these

1:36:09

four pillars of plastic

1:36:12

that make people slow down a little bit in the center of the

1:36:14

street. And they're like, these didn't used to be around

1:36:16

in the old days, not when I was growing up.

1:36:18

And then other people are like, yeah, but people

1:36:20

drive like assholes. Like, we gotta stop

1:36:22

them. And it's like, I don't know, neighborhood's

1:36:25

changing a lot. Like, everyone's just

1:36:27

so mad about something. It's

1:36:30

like,

1:36:31

but you're, so you're saying you're

1:36:33

pro, oh, is that your husband? No. No.

1:36:37

No. Why is he at that

1:36:39

house? Right here, Karen. All right, yeah. That's

1:36:43

like saying that they wanna go back to the time

1:36:45

where pedestrians were just getting mowed down

1:36:47

all the time. I just liked it when like auto

1:36:50

fatalities were higher, you know? It's

1:36:52

better. Jump driving, miss

1:36:55

it all. Nobody wore their seatbelt. You

1:36:57

didn't have to back then, you know?

1:37:00

You just died or you lived, you know? We

1:37:03

saw on the Next Door app, the email came

1:37:05

in and I opened it and it said, did anyone here,

1:37:08

the cops say, come out with your

1:37:10

hands up? Kurt Brunneller did a tweet of that.

1:37:12

Yes, I saw. And then I saw it was Kurt. And

1:37:15

I was like, is this a bad

1:37:16

time to ask? Kurt's on Next Door? Yeah.

1:37:19

Kurt's on Next Door, absolutely spiraling about

1:37:22

this. This is so funny to me. I didn't make

1:37:24

the joke because I thought he actually

1:37:26

might be totally freaking out. So

1:37:29

he is like in the neighborhood and he heard

1:37:31

cops saying that? He was outside,

1:37:34

I think they were watching fireworks and they heard cops,

1:37:36

I think from a helicopter say,

1:37:39

put down your weapons and come out of the house

1:37:41

or something. And so he scurried his kids into

1:37:43

the house and then just asked on Twitter and

1:37:45

then apparently on Next Door. Yeah. Like,

1:37:47

did anybody hear that? Does anyone know what's going

1:37:49

on? Yeah, it was funny to see because usually

1:37:51

it's just about a stolen bike. And

1:37:53

I was like, wait, I know that guy. I

1:37:56

did not make the hot tub joke. That's really

1:37:58

funny though, is now. Oh, a bad time. Wait,

1:38:01

you guys, Oscar goes to bed in five minutes. Can

1:38:03

I just sit here for, no, I'm just kidding. No, you waited out.

1:38:06

Just waited out, let Jared do it. Sorry,

1:38:08

we just got talking and I

1:38:10

could not get back. I couldn't

1:38:13

get back until 7.45. Yeah,

1:38:15

right during talking time. Well,

1:38:18

you're a delight, I was telling Chris and

1:38:20

Analise before you got in the car, and

1:38:22

I know I've already told you this, but

1:38:24

I always say when I very first met you, it

1:38:27

was like I already knew you to the degree where I was

1:38:29

like, it feels like she's my cousin. It's

1:38:31

the weirdest thing how, well,

1:38:34

I just adore you, but I

1:38:36

also love your comedy so much, and

1:38:39

it's just so nice to know a person like you. Oh,

1:38:41

you're so nice, you like always are so nice.

1:38:43

Well, I love you, I hardly like

1:38:45

anybody, so it's fun when I like someone. Well,

1:38:49

I love to hear that. You know, it's like when people

1:38:51

say, I don't usually like female comics, but you

1:38:53

were funny. Yeah,

1:38:54

that's what I like. I don't like most people,

1:38:56

but you, you I like. Yeah, I'll take it, I'll

1:38:58

take it. All the other girls can go to hell.

1:39:01

You, you're good. Oh

1:39:03

my God, I love you guys, this is always so much fun.

1:39:06

Yeah,

1:39:07

I was looking forward to you

1:39:09

all day. Oh, should we wrap it up

1:39:11

while we all show mine? Do the ending.

1:39:14

You've been listening to Do You Need a Ride?

1:39:17

PYN, A-R.

1:39:20

Oh, beep, beep, beep.

1:39:23

This has been an exactly right production.

1:39:26

Produced by Analise Nelson. Mixed

1:39:28

by Edson Choi. Our talent booker

1:39:30

is Patrick Kotner. Theme song by

1:39:32

Karen Kilgariff. Artwork by Chris

1:39:35

Fairbanks. Follow the show on Instagram,

1:39:37

Twitter, and Facebook at Dynar Podcast.

1:39:40

That's D-Y-N-A-R podcast.

1:39:42

For more information, go to exactlyrightmedia.com.

1:39:46

Thank you. Oh, you're welcome.

1:39:50

So you have to press down on the button. Press on the button.

1:39:53

Ooh, sexual. That's

1:39:56

really fun. All

1:39:59

right, guys.

1:39:59

Wow, wow, I can't believe

1:40:02

I got to ride in a Tesla. I'm a man.