It’s high time that we be honest with ourselves. Because it's not about which partner to blame or whose mistake it is.. its about spending each day of your life in silly arguments, judgment games, accusations, assumptions, etc and degrading yourself daily as a partner and more importantly as a human. You will need a lot of patience and when I say a lot of patience I mean a lottt of patience because it's not going to be easy. But you are suffering daily mentally, physically and emotionally. This will have to stop. and if the partner is not taking any step towards it, You will.
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