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One Eleven Funny welcome to the

0:44

program. Hydrant galore.

0:47

I. What's. Up. I

0:50

wanna thank you for taking the

0:53

call I am trying will make

0:55

my. Thank. You

0:57

I am trying to make. My

1:00

father dead to me. Ah,

1:03

Do. And. When he

1:05

had an idiot a clipper. What? Is dead?

1:07

Do you may mean? And.

1:10

Mean. Kill.

1:14

Him at not part of my life anymore

1:16

because he did some bad things. To

1:19

my sister and I. And

1:21

yeah, I'm.

1:23

Having a very hard time. Just.

1:27

Letting him go like God because of the

1:29

anger. You know I have a lot angry

1:31

at a project ahead of me. I have

1:34

a project to write everything down. That.

1:37

You've ever done. And

1:40

then forgive him. I thought I had forgiven him. At

1:43

it and little rap who told you

1:45

to forgive them that is such bull

1:47

crap. Anybody. Who told

1:49

you that? Handed. You

1:51

bull crap. You. Don't forgive

1:53

it. And. You don't have to have him

1:55

dead to you. And

1:59

the more you spend are you present? And

2:02

them more that you ruminate on this

2:04

the more negative and upset and focused

2:06

on things other than the quality of

2:08

your life. There's.

2:11

A difference between letting something go

2:13

because it's so destructive and descriptive.

2:16

To today. Is

2:19

that a matter of. Somebody.

2:21

Did something evil? You. Don't

2:23

forgive them. Ever. Didn't

2:27

have to be dead if. You just

2:29

you. Just. You. Know just. Pull.

2:33

Yourself together. To.

2:35

Face a life without the

2:37

anger. Your

2:42

justified. In. Being angry? That doesn't mean

2:44

you have to be angry every. That

2:48

doesn't mean you keep going to therapy and

2:50

go through the list of things and right

2:52

admin, Burn them and forgive them and all

2:54

that crap. At. This crap. Bad.

2:57

Stuff happened. Your. Mother

3:00

brought an evil person into your lives.

3:03

He did evil. And

3:06

you survived. To. Make.

3:09

Perhaps. You got educated, Perhaps you got married?

3:11

Perhaps you have a nice hobby. You've.

3:13

Survived it. You

3:16

flourished anyway. So. Instead

3:18

of going over how angry we are.

3:21

And. Struggling with something you don't want to do

3:23

which is forgive him which I think it's absurd.

3:25

To forgive him. Instead

3:30

of going on. Facing

3:33

what you've done in spite of. Having

3:35

him. And. His evil things.

3:39

Your. Dot dwelling on the thing said. Bring.

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Three things you've done in spite of what he's

6:25

done to you. Three. Things you've

6:27

done in spite us. And

6:32

spite of home. While I would say

6:34

I graduated college, but I had to

6:37

because he. He. Gave us all the.

6:39

You. Know you got one year to. Get out after mom

6:41

died. And. Now I first of

6:44

all, died his first of all. Stop

6:46

it. That's a ridiculous

6:48

thing you're saying. And

6:51

it's interesting that you went to the

6:53

ridiculous. Because. You didn't want.

6:55

Give yourself credit. You.

6:58

Didn't have do. You.

7:02

Weighed the. Situation.

7:05

And made the decision to. You. Didn't

7:07

have do you could have walked out. Soldier

7:09

Body in New York City. That

7:12

syrup. So

7:14

I already learned that you don't

7:16

like to give yourself credit. Because.

7:19

You're still a victim. Victims

7:21

don't give themselves credit. And.

7:25

He's that. Making. You a victim

7:27

Today you are. To.

7:31

Give me to other things you've done in spite of him.

7:36

To sign or pounds. Not.

7:40

At home Number Three. I.

7:44

Raised two kids and chose a wonderful

7:46

husband. Why?

7:48

Are these three things not something you

7:51

remind yourself every day and make lists

7:53

of every day instead of making lists

7:55

of the agrees to. See.

7:58

a difference era pissed Wow,

8:02

I just totally didn't expect you to say

8:04

that. Think

8:09

on the positive, huh? No,

8:12

it's not thinking on the positive. It's

8:14

look at what you've done in spite

8:17

of him. And instead

8:19

of just resting on

8:21

those laurels, we have to keep going back

8:24

with therapists and stretching up the other good

8:26

crap. How

8:29

is that useful? I

8:32

maintain it's not. You're

8:36

a functional, wonderful human

8:38

being in spite of him. Enjoy

8:41

that. Throw away the list. Please.

8:45

Please. All I

8:49

can come up with is a black scribble mark anyway.

8:52

Good. Because you didn't want to forgive it.

9:01

Gosh, thank you so much.

9:03

I've just totally, like, pointed

9:05

me in a different direction and I appreciate that. Good.

9:09

You deserve it. You've earned it.

9:12

You've worked hard for it. Stop going backwards

9:14

into the darkness. Stop it. Okay.

9:21

Okay. I will sit

9:23

with that for a

9:25

while. You function. Then I will. You

9:28

function spectacularly well. You

9:31

don't need to make ugly lists. My

9:33

number 1-800-375-2872. You

9:40

know, you

9:42

go into marital therapy and the first thing the therapist

9:44

does is find out what

9:47

the problems are. Walk

9:49

in. It's the

9:51

first thing the therapist does and says, tell me

9:53

about how you met. Tell

9:55

me about what made you fall in love. Tell

9:58

me about when you first met. You really

10:00

liked. Tell. Me some. So.

10:07

What are your problems? My.

10:10

Number One: Eight Hundred. Three. Seven,

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join the growing number of listeners who

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