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Prince Felix Yusopov: How to Get Away with (Rasputin’s) Murder

Prince Felix Yusopov: How to Get Away with (Rasputin’s) Murder

Released Monday, 22nd April 2024
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Prince Felix Yusopov: How to Get Away with (Rasputin’s) Murder

Prince Felix Yusopov: How to Get Away with (Rasputin’s) Murder

Prince Felix Yusopov: How to Get Away with (Rasputin’s) Murder

Prince Felix Yusopov: How to Get Away with (Rasputin’s) Murder

Monday, 22nd April 2024
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to even the

0:02

royals early and ad-free right now. Join Wondery

0:04

Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple

0:06

Podcasts. A quick

0:08

note about our show. We do a lot

0:10

of research for our stories, but we also

0:13

aren't your boring high school history class. So

0:15

some details and scenes are dramatized. Today's

0:17

story contains descriptions of murder and

0:20

some cursing. Please be advised.

0:22

What is your favorite

0:24

comedy show? So

0:29

Brooke, pop quiz, high level. What

0:31

did we talk about in the last two

0:34

episodes? Okay, as my best friend, this is

0:36

unacceptable behavior. I know, it is. I

0:38

blame producers. They're literally sitting next to me and they're

0:40

like, ask her. Ask her. Um,

0:44

so, oh boy, Raspy wouldn't get

0:46

off that family's dick. Um,

0:52

I don't know. You got to catch

0:54

me up. I'm sorry. Yes. You were

0:56

right in the sense that the last

0:59

two episodes are about Rasputin. So partial

1:01

points. That's basically what I said. Yep.

1:03

Verbatim, essentially. Yeah. And

1:05

for our royalists who didn't catch those

1:08

episodes, check them out. But

1:10

if you're here to meet Rasputin's killer, you have come

1:12

to the right place. Bonus points

1:14

if you're also looking for masquerade balls,

1:16

murder plots, and a whole lot of

1:18

mayhem. Because we've got those two. Wow.

1:22

Before we get into it though, a quick

1:24

refresher if Brooke's very

1:26

detailed retelling wasn't enough. Oh

1:28

no. Rasputin was a drunk whose

1:30

life was going nowhere until a saint came to

1:32

him in a dream. And then

1:35

after that, he became a spiritual guru. Think

1:37

Gwyneth Paltrow meets Joel Austin with a

1:39

healthy dose of hypnosis. Now

1:42

Rasputin's new path led him to St. Petersburg

1:44

where he eventually caught the attention of the

1:46

Tsar and Tsarina, who at the time were

1:48

in need of a miracle because their

1:50

only son and heir to the throne

1:52

was born with a disease that could kill him, and to

1:55

Rasputin, who threw sheer luck or perhaps

1:57

some magic if you're a believer. was

2:00

able to heal the boy again and

2:02

again. But there are a lot

2:04

of Russians who aren't thrilled that a peasant has

2:06

been advising the Tsarans arena and they want to

2:09

bring him down. And that's where

2:11

today's royal comes in. Prince

2:13

Felix Fusipov, who's a playboy

2:15

who makes it his mission

2:17

to destroy Rasputin. But

2:19

in the process, he unknowingly speeds

2:21

up the end of the last

2:23

Russian imperial dynasty. Strap

2:25

in brook because we're getting inside the

2:28

head of Prince Felix, magic school bus

2:30

style. Ooh, I'm

2:32

strapped. It's

2:37

December 29th, 1916 and

2:41

29-year-old Prince Felix Fusipov

2:43

is dragging a heavy table across his

2:45

basement floor. He gets it into

2:47

position and then flops down on a nearby chair.

2:50

But as he looks around the empty room,

2:52

his heart starts to race. And

2:54

it's not from furniture aerobics, it's

2:56

from nerves. Tonight's a

2:59

big night for Felix. He's invited

3:01

one of St. Petersburg's most talked about

3:03

men over for a little whining and

3:05

dining, Raghuri Rasputin,

3:08

aka the personal advisor of the Tsarans

3:10

arena of Russia. Now

3:12

Felix dismissed the holy man for a long

3:14

time, mostly because Rasputin is a peasant.

3:17

And on principle, a wealthy playboy

3:19

like Prince Felix never

3:21

socializes with poor people. But

3:24

Rasputin kept fanboying Felix into a

3:26

friendship. And honestly, it's a win-win

3:28

for both of them. Rasputin gets

3:31

a powerful noble friend and Felix

3:33

gets advice in New Age energy

3:35

slash hypnosis therapy. They've

3:37

actually seen a lot of one another

3:39

over the last few weeks. But tonight's

3:41

get-together is special. Rasputin thinks

3:43

he's been invited over for a private evening

3:46

with Felix and his wife, Arena. But

3:48

Arena is not coming. Tonight

3:50

is about Felix and what he thinks

3:52

is best for Russia. Uh-oh. That's

3:55

why everything has to be perfect. Felix

3:58

rushes across the room to fuss with velvet

4:00

curtains. He rarely lifts more than

4:02

a pinky around the house, but keeping

4:04

his hands busy is the only way he can

4:06

stay calm. He looks

4:08

around and admires his work. Hours

4:11

ago, this basement was as dank and

4:13

empty as a 20-something dude's apartment. You

4:15

know, the kind with the mattress on

4:17

the floor? Yes. Now there's

4:20

carpet, furniture, and curtains, so it

4:22

looks like a 20-something dude with

4:24

a girlfriend's apartment. God, that is

4:26

the truest thing. I swear to God.

4:28

I know. And it's perfect,

4:30

because Felix wants Rasputin to be at ease. The

4:33

principal's out a box of small cakes to

4:35

arrange on a silver tray. They're a special

4:37

treat just for Rasputin and their works

4:40

of art. Each

4:42

cake is a moist sponge with delicate

4:44

icing, and hiding behind

4:47

their layers is something extra delightful.

4:50

Crushed capsules of cyanide. Oh, love it.

4:52

One of my favorite recipes. Mm-hmm, just

4:55

really brings out the flavors. When

4:58

Felix places his tray of cakes on the

5:00

table, he feels a strange calm wash over

5:02

him. Felix is done all

5:04

he can do to prepare. It's time to

5:07

fetch his new friend for their special evening.

5:10

Felix puts on his hat and coat and heads out

5:12

to the car. But before he

5:14

leaves, he catches his reflection in a hall

5:16

mirror and smiles. Everything

5:18

is finally about to fall into

5:20

place, because in a few

5:23

hours, Rasputin will die.

5:26

Felix will make sure of it. If

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WONDERY, I'm Arisha Sidmar-Williams.

7:11

And I'm Brooke Ziffred. And this is

7:13

Even The Royal. This

7:24

episode is all about Prince Felix

7:26

Yucatay, a Russian royal

7:28

who wants for Gory Rasputin dead.

7:31

In the last two episodes, we watched Rasputin

7:33

discover his spiritual calling and

7:36

scheme his way into guiding the most powerful

7:38

family in Russia. Now, a

7:41

prince is determined to stop his rise,

7:44

by any means necessary. This

7:47

is How to Get Away with

7:49

Rasputin's Murder. Okay,

7:56

Brooke. We're turning back the clock 12 Years

7:58

before that fateful December. night at

8:00

and it's winter night you know?

8:03

For in St. Petersburg, Rasputin's is

8:05

just starting to master the art.

8:07

Of kissing Noble Dairy errors but it's still

8:09

a few years away from advising the. Royal

8:11

family and. In. The palace that

8:13

are in Alexandra is discovering that her

8:16

son has been the Celia, but tonight

8:18

we're leaving palace intrigue aside and heading

8:20

to a costume party. A fancy masquerade

8:22

ball is underway in the Capital. Ah,

8:25

and seventeen year old Prince Felix is

8:27

eight on the dance floor leading his

8:29

best night. I love mostly Daddy's I

8:31

know we need to start have a

8:34

bomb or what? Saw a Masquerade. Murder

8:36

Mystery Party. Honestly, that's the most

8:38

amazing thing I've ever heard Think. You

8:40

The glittering ballroom is filled with

8:43

societies crammed zola cram. Everyone is

8:45

just to the nines and wearing.

8:47

Masks or last Cinderella Story.

8:49

Isn't and it sounds like we should be

8:51

there because the room is also filled with

8:54

beautiful ladies. A little while and then one

8:56

young lady is talking to a handsome imperial.

8:58

Guard She's wearing a sequined dress and

9:00

her. Dark. Hair is none up and ringlets.

9:03

Basically she's the picture of beauty and grace.

9:05

Or her, but one the hottie she's

9:07

talking few tries to untie her mask.

9:10

she playfully flaps his hand away. Seen

9:12

fit for an early aughts rom com.

9:14

But unlike Hillary Duff, the secret here

9:17

isn't that she's a nerd who has

9:19

to work at a diner as satisfying

9:21

woman is actually Russian playboy France Felix.

9:24

You suppose we'll. Let he's

9:26

playing a woman. Yes, Feel it's

9:28

love dressing up as a woman. Okay, great

9:30

looking and adores the attention he gets. Okay,

9:33

I love this for him. I really do.

9:35

Me till now. he's the younger have

9:37

two brothers which means he's been the

9:39

invisible spare for his whole life so

9:41

he really loves getting the adoring attention

9:43

for a man. Like what's happening tonight

9:45

Felix flirts and cracks a joke as

9:48

the guard last feel it sneaks of

9:50

heat over his shoulder to see if

9:52

his brother Nicholas is still keeping an

9:54

eye on him. Saw this is not

9:56

Bizarre Russia who was also named Nicholas

9:58

said to avoid confusion with. Call this

10:00

one Nick. Okay. Now

10:03

Nick is a pretty cool older brother. He

10:05

knows Felix feels great in his gowns and is

10:07

like, you do you boo boo. He

10:09

even buys Felix new outfits to wear and

10:12

gets him a gig singing at a cabaret.

10:14

Oh my God, that's really sweet. It

10:17

is, it is very sweet. But Nick is

10:19

also worried about Felix. Now this is a little over

10:21

100 years before RuPaul's

10:23

Drag Race hit your local cable station.

10:25

Yeah. So it would be a major scandal if

10:28

Felix is caught in women's clothing. Even though

10:30

men have been wearing

10:32

wigs since the dawn of time. And

10:35

dresses. Yeah, exactly.

10:38

Nick is protective of his younger

10:40

brother. So he constantly checks on

10:42

him, which totally cramps Felix's style.

10:44

He loves the thrill of doing something

10:46

off limits and flirting at this ball

10:48

is starting to feel like yesterday's news.

10:51

Felix looks over and notices that Nick is

10:53

distracted by a lady, which means this might

10:56

be his chance to push his fun a

10:58

little further. And when Felix looks

11:00

back at the guard, he's giving the prince, should

11:03

we take this somewhere more private eyes?

11:05

Felix takes one final look to make sure

11:08

his brother is still distracted and

11:10

then snakes off with the guard to a private

11:12

room with a few of his guard buddies.

11:14

Oh. And at first he's

11:16

like, now we're talking. But big surprise, the

11:18

men stop behaving once they're away from the

11:21

eyes of the whole party. They

11:23

start getting handsy with Felix, too

11:26

handsy. And then one of

11:28

them reaches for Felix's mask. Not what

11:30

I thought you were gonna say. Yeah,

11:33

Felix flees his. It's all been fun and

11:35

game so far, but this is where

11:37

things get a little too risky, even

11:39

for him. Yeah, he has to find

11:41

an exit, but with several big dudes

11:44

pawing at him, an escape is gonna

11:46

require something drastic. Felix grabs

11:48

a champagne bottle off a table and slams

11:50

it into a wall mirror. Glass

11:52

shatters across the room. Bad

11:55

luck for seven years for everyone around.

11:57

Oh no. But honestly,

11:59

this is. now my go-to-emergency exit strategy

12:01

for all scenarios. It's a

12:03

lost art. Yeah. The men are

12:06

super confused, and they start shouting at one

12:08

another to stop this alcohol-wasting lady from getting

12:10

away. But Felix is clicked on

12:12

his feet and bolts to the door before they can

12:14

grab him. Before he leaves, he

12:16

slips the light off in the room for good measure. Then

12:19

he runs out into the snowy night. Felix

12:22

breathes a sigh of relief. That was a little

12:25

too much attention. Can

12:28

I just say really quick, this is something all men should have

12:30

to do. All straight men should have to dress up

12:32

as a woman and see what kind of attention they get from men. Mm-hmm.

12:35

And that might really change some things for them. One

12:38

thousand percent agree. Felix

12:40

feels pretty smug that he got away with his

12:42

high-speed chase at the ball. But then a

12:44

few months later, his father tells Felix

12:46

they need to have a talk. Bone-chilling

12:49

words for a teenager of any century to

12:52

hear from a parent. Yeah, definitely. And

12:54

while Felix adores his mother, his father,

12:57

not so much. He's

12:59

like the classic stiff dad who never learned how

13:01

to say, I love you to his kids. Ah,

13:03

yeah. And he never cared to get to know

13:06

his sons on a personal level. When

13:08

Felix goes to his dad's room, Papa

13:10

Yusupov brings down the hammer. He

13:12

says that Felix's hoop-skirted secret is out of

13:14

the bag. Then he spits

13:17

out a litany of insults, saying that

13:19

Felix is a disgrace to the family,

13:21

and that people like Felix aren't fit

13:23

to breathe the same air as, quote,

13:25

honest folk. Wow. He also says

13:27

that Felix deserves to be shipped off to

13:29

Russia's coldest wastelands. Geez. So

13:32

much love in that family. Yeah, you know, it's a tale

13:34

of all this time on this show. Dick dads. Dick

13:36

dads. And to top off the insults, dick

13:39

dads like, you're now going to have to

13:41

take frigid cold showers as punishment. Which sounds

13:43

like a nightmare, but Felix handles it pretty

13:45

well, all things considered. He

13:47

agrees to squash his less mainstream desires

13:49

in order to appease his parents. He

13:52

says he'll only dress in men's clothing and date

13:54

women, which he says he likes, even

13:56

if he prefers to be the wooed instead of

13:59

the wooer. Which, uh,

14:01

join the club. Yeah, exactly. But

14:03

still, Felix feels all kinds of

14:05

depressed after getting caught. Thankfully, his

14:07

brother Nick is there to cheer him up

14:09

and remind him of what's ahead. Mm-hmm. He's

14:12

Felix's biggest supporter and the only family member

14:14

who loves him no matter how he wants

14:16

to dress. Nick is also the

14:18

guy who covers Felix's ass when he needs it most.

14:21

The chandler to his Joey. Aw. But

14:24

Nick is about to get into a little trouble

14:26

himself, which will be Felix without his safety blanket.

14:31

It's June of 1908, a few years

14:33

after Felix got in trouble with his dad. The

14:36

prince is now 21 years old and is

14:38

woken up by his valet. The man's

14:40

eyes are wild and he says something

14:43

terrible has happened. Felix is confused.

14:46

He races out of his room and hears his

14:48

father wailing from his dressing room. Oh no. Felix's

14:50

heart drops. This can't be good.

14:54

He runs past several servants, all

14:56

of whom look like they've seen a ghost. But

14:58

still, no one tells him what's wrong. Felix

15:01

follows the sobs through the house. And

15:04

with every step, the sinking feeling in his

15:06

stomach grows. He steps into

15:08

his father's dressing room and sees his mother hunched

15:10

over a body on a stretcher. It's

15:13

Nick's body. No. And he's

15:15

not moving. Oh, Nick. It's

15:18

the first time Felix has seen his brother in

15:20

Weeps. Nick has been totally

15:23

wrapped up in a relationship with a married

15:25

woman. Boo. And now he's dead.

15:28

The woman's husband had been threatening Nick to

15:31

a duel, but Nick reassured Felix that the

15:33

challenge had tapered off. But

15:35

looking at his brother's bloody body, he

15:37

knows Nick lied to him. Felix

15:40

feels his knees buckle beneath him and he

15:42

sinks onto the floor. Tears

15:45

run down his face as he looks at his brother's

15:47

body. And it hits him. Now

15:50

he's all alone. Which

15:52

also means the weight of the Yousafov name

15:54

is now on his shoulders. Oh yeah. Aka.

15:58

He's supposed to be the respectable prince. above.

16:01

At first, the thought makes him shudder,

16:03

but then he sees a silver lining.

16:06

This also means that he's set to

16:08

inherit the use of hub fortune in

16:10

its entirety, meaning he's destined to

16:12

become one of the richest men in

16:14

Russia. That really turned around fast for

16:16

him. I know. He's like, he's gone. Oh,

16:18

I'm going to be rich. Yeah. Let me

16:20

dry my tears with money. Mm hmm.

16:23

But to be fair, Felix is sickened

16:25

by his own thoughts. Still,

16:28

the prince can't help himself. If

16:30

you like the attention from men at balls, how

16:33

about the attention and groveling of all

16:35

of Russia at his filthy rich feet?

16:37

Oh, God. The vision is addictive. But

16:40

now he needs to prove to the world that he can go

16:42

from Felix the party boy to Felix the

16:45

dignified prince, which after years

16:47

of playing the bad boy is a lot

16:49

easier said than done. Over

16:53

a year after his brother's death, Felix is sitting

16:55

at a friend's house in St. Petersburg.

16:58

He looks around the sitting room trying to prepare himself

17:00

for the guest he knows is coming. A

17:03

spiritual healer named Grigori

17:05

Rasputin. Now Felix is conflicted about

17:08

being here. His mother hates Rasputin.

17:11

She thinks he's a dirty peasant who's trying

17:13

to manipulate the Zarns arena. And

17:15

while Felix may like to rebel sometimes,

17:17

his mother's opinions are important to him.

17:20

But a friend begged him to come meet Rasputin

17:22

at her place. She's a big

17:24

Rasputin stan and believes that he was sent

17:27

to Earth to guide their thoughts and actions.

17:29

Wow. And with Nick gone,

17:31

Felix has lost his biggest confidant and

17:33

guiding hand. So maybe having

17:35

a spiritual advisor wouldn't be so bad.

17:38

It's kind of like when I went to

17:40

get my one and only psychic reading, I was

17:42

skeptical, but I can't deny a little part of

17:44

me wanted it to do something magical. That's the

17:46

best part. And it didn't. Oh, stop. Rasputin

17:51

strolls into the room where Felix is sitting with

17:53

his friend. And Felix immediately

17:55

notices how scraggly Rasputin's long beard

17:57

is and how creepy his eyes

17:59

are. It's like they're

18:01

staring into his soul. The

18:03

holy man beelines for Felix and says, Good

18:06

evening, my dear boy. As

18:08

if they're good friends. And

18:10

then Rasputin leans in to kiss him on the cheek. Felix

18:13

jerks away. This cheek is for high

18:15

class lips only. Oh wow. Rasputin

18:18

starts to talk about the Bible, which is

18:20

a great icebreaker for any party. Yeah.

18:23

Felix can tell Rasputin is trying to get him to

18:25

open up. And for a moment, he

18:27

can feel the magnetic pull of the holy man.

18:30

No wonder his friends swear by Rasputin.

18:33

The guy's eyes are literally like magnets. Creepy

18:36

soul-bearing magnets. That's what I don't get. He

18:38

has the creepiest eyes, but yet people are

18:41

like, this guy. I know. It's

18:44

weird. But then Felix drags his gaze away

18:46

and sees the scraggly beard and faded

18:48

clothes. And he's like, uh-uh. There's

18:51

no way I'm letting a filthy peasant into

18:53

my head. He's relieved when the

18:56

meeting finally ends. Rasputin

18:58

says goodbye with a line that proves

19:00

he's fluent in ass kissing. He says,

19:02

quote, Ask for you, my dear

19:04

boy. You will go far. Very

19:07

far. Felix is probably

19:09

like, hello, I'm a filthy

19:11

rich prince. I don't need some spiritual

19:13

bullshit to tell me this. Mm-hmm. Felix's

19:16

friends. They might see Rasputin as

19:18

a treasure, but Felix is not

19:20

convinced. No supposed miracle man

19:23

is going to fill the gap his brother

19:25

left behind. Felix walks

19:27

out that day feeling unsettled. But

19:29

about seven years later, he'll end up right

19:31

back in Rasputin's web. Except

19:34

this time, the spoiled prince will

19:36

be out for blood. Audible

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21:13

it's October 1916 and

21:15

Prince Felix is at the Yousapin Palace in st.

21:18

Petersburg and he is

21:20

mind-numbingly bored over the last

21:22

seven years Felix has been busy he went

21:25

to Oxford and studied English after

21:28

graduating he married Bazaar's niece

21:30

princess arena the wedding

21:32

was over the top yeah like Kim

21:34

Kardashian wearing Marilyn Monroe's dress but

21:37

less scandalous of course yeah

21:40

definitely two years ago World War

21:42

one broke out and last summer

21:44

Felix started officer training school which

21:46

sounds super valiant but a being an

21:48

officer does not mean he's fighting on

21:50

the front lines and B

21:52

he only joined because all of his friends

21:54

enlisted and he got bored but officer

21:57

training is dull right now it

21:59

mostly consists of studying for his exams. So

22:02

to fill his time, he's been fussing over the

22:04

decorations for his new wing at the palace. Now

22:07

that he's married, he's sprucing it up. But

22:10

he dreams of being a respectable

22:12

and respected Prince of Importance, and

22:14

spending his days giving his best Martha Stewart isn't

22:16

going to do the trick. A

22:20

knock at the door interrupts Felix's spiral

22:22

of boredom. A messenger enters

22:24

and hands him a letter from his mother.

22:27

Now Felix is a little nervous to read it. He

22:30

loves his mom, but she can be controlling and tough

22:32

on him. Plus, she never

22:34

fully recovered after his brother died.

22:37

Felix opens a letter, and it's long.

22:41

He can tell from the jagged cursive that she's

22:43

ranting about the war again. For the

22:46

last two years, Russia has been crushed in the

22:48

war by Germany and their allies. Thousands

22:51

of Russian soldiers are dying on the

22:53

battlefield every week, and the peasants back

22:55

home are angry because they have

22:57

nothing to eat. Felix and his

22:59

mom are less concerned about the starving peasants

23:01

and more concerned with unhappy mobs blaming

23:03

the rich for Russia's problems. It's

23:06

hard out here for them. Yeah.

23:09

There's been talk of revolution and putting

23:12

an end to the monarchy for years. And

23:14

with the war going to shit, these threats

23:16

have only intensified. These above are in

23:18

no rush to see the monarchy disappear.

23:20

They may not be Tsars, but

23:22

they are royals. But

23:25

today's letter is mostly focused on Rasputin. He's

23:27

the man his mom believes is to blame for

23:29

all of Russia's problems. Now

23:32

remember, Felix's mom has hated Rasputin for

23:34

years, and her hatred has

23:36

only intensified as the war rages

23:38

on. The Tsar has made

23:40

some horrible strategic decisions that have cost

23:42

a lot of Russian lives. And

23:45

like many nobles, Felix's mother believes

23:47

that Rasputin is a puppeteer directing the

23:49

Tsar in Zarena. I mean, that's

23:51

not an unfair thought to have. It's not

23:53

at all. Felix's own discomfort with

23:56

Rasputin has also been growing, and for the

23:58

past year and a half, he's been He's

24:00

tried to avoid the holy man altogether. Felix

24:03

skins the letter and he can feel his own

24:05

anger rise up. His mother

24:07

is freaking out about how respect for the

24:09

royal family has disappeared. There

24:11

are reports of riots breaking out in the

24:13

streets and that the police have joined in.

24:16

Oh, yeah. Wow. Never

24:18

happened in this day and age. People are

24:20

yelling things like, down with the war and

24:22

down with the dirty bourgeoisie. Oh.

24:25

Mama Yusupov goes on to berate Bazar and

24:28

Zareena for ignoring reality. Anti-resbutant

24:31

sentiment is at an all-time high. But

24:33

Alex and Nicholas refuse to part ways with him.

24:37

And then Felix's mother adds, quote,

24:39

I disdain everyone who tolerates this

24:42

and remains silent. Felix

24:44

throws the letter down. He hates

24:46

seeing his mother this upset. It

24:49

gives Dick Sean's I'm coming, mama. From

24:51

It's a Mad, Bad, Bad, Bad World.

24:53

Great film. You must

24:55

watch. God. And Felix can't get her

24:57

words out of his head. It revs up

24:59

his pulse and makes him sweat. Adrenaline

25:01

is literally coursing through his veins. And

25:05

it feels way better than bored of. Which

25:08

is when Felix gets his light bulb moment. Maybe

25:11

he can do more for Russia than just

25:13

take his silly officer training exams. If

25:15

resputant were gone, then surely Russia would go back

25:17

to what it used to be, a calm,

25:20

steady constitutional monarchy. That's

25:23

what everyone says. There'd

25:25

be no more challenges to the status quo or

25:28

the bourgeoisie's heads. All

25:30

of Russia would celebrate the disappearance of

25:32

this parasite. Plus, he'd make

25:35

his mama proud. And

25:37

his name would be forever remembered in the history

25:39

books as Prince Felix

25:41

Yusupov, the savior of Russia. The

25:44

only question now is how to do it.

25:49

So our playboy Prince has a mission, but

25:51

no clue how to achieve it. Clearly,

25:53

resputant needs to be eliminated. But

25:56

murder is illegal even for a prince. thinks

26:00

about hiring an assassin to do the dirty work

26:02

for him. Until a friend points out

26:04

that even if Felix can find someone to

26:06

do it for money, they would just rat

26:08

him out the second someone else offers him

26:10

a bigger check. Exactly. Truly the

26:12

woes of hiring an assassin. Yeah, it's like

26:14

watch a true crime documentary, man. I know,

26:17

just one. Yeah. A few weeks later,

26:19

Felix is sitting in the gallery of a

26:21

Duma meeting, which as you may remember, is

26:23

basically the equivalent of the U.S. House of

26:25

Representatives. Arisha, I think I've proven my

26:27

memory is great. Well,

26:30

as you also may remember, the group

26:32

happens to be very pro-Rasputin.

26:35

Uh-huh, of course. Nope, they're anti-Rasputin.

26:37

Damn it! I knew it, I

26:39

knew it! Got her! Oh,

26:42

wow. Ha ha ha ha.

26:44

The betrayal. So,

26:47

just to be clear, the group

26:49

is very anti-Rasputin. Anti-Rasputin, yeah, exactly.

26:53

So, Felix is happy to be surrounded by

26:55

like-minded people today, particularly since he's

26:57

still wrestling with how to get rid of

26:59

Rasputin. And almost as if

27:01

on cue, a Duma member on stage

27:04

starts ripping Rasputin a new one. The

27:06

member starts off by saying, quote, "'All

27:09

evil proceeds from those dark forces,

27:11

"'from those influences which are headed

27:13

by Rasputin.'" Which is the

27:16

definition of coming in hot. Yeah. The

27:18

member goes on to tell the men there to

27:21

throw themselves at Bazar's feet and beg him to

27:23

see the destruction that is Rasputin. And

27:25

the words hit Felix like arrows to the heart,

27:28

but less romantic. Felix

27:30

starts to shake. This is what

27:32

he's already been thinking for weeks. The

27:35

Duma member wraps up his speech by saying,

27:37

quote, "'May Rasputin no longer be

27:39

the leader of life in Russia.'" The

27:42

whole hall explodes into you. Some

27:45

people cry, "'Bravo!'" The

27:47

sounds of the crowd's approval ring in Felix's

27:49

head, and he feels like he might faint.

27:52

This is it. This is what the

27:54

people want. And if

27:56

he were to do something about Rasputin, all

27:59

these people will be there. would be cheering

28:01

for him. Felix storms out of the hall

28:03

like a man on a mission. Because he is. He

28:06

knows he can't rely on some assassin. Somebody

28:09

call Annalise Keating because it's time

28:11

for murder 101. Ooh. Press mutant

28:13

needs to be killed. And

28:15

Felix needs to do it himself. Did

28:19

anyone say can we kill him because I might have missed that

28:21

part of the meeting? I think he's misinterpreting

28:24

things. This is what all radicals do.

28:26

They're like, oh this is what everyone wants, absolute

28:29

destruction of murders. Got it. He's like, we gotta beg

28:31

the Zard. He's like, got it. We

28:33

gotta kill Rasputin. I'm on the same page,

28:35

guys. But

28:37

Felix isn't actually so bold as to

28:40

commit murder solo. Over the

28:42

next few days, he locks in four co-conspirators.

28:45

All of these co-conspirators are sold on the

28:47

glory and the patriotism of the assignment. And

28:50

one of the four is his

28:52

mother. Oh boy. Yeah. Mama Yusupov

28:54

is like Mama-Jur Kris Jenner, just with

28:56

murder instead of naked photo shoots. But

28:58

he's doing amazing, sweetie. Yeah. Felix's

29:01

mom is many hours away at their other

29:03

home in Crimea. Please tell me there's a

29:05

river in town called Crimea River. Justin

29:09

Timberlake said never. But

29:11

Crimea is a peninsula on the Black Sea

29:13

and it's under Russian control. Okay. So

29:16

his mom is far away, but she regularly

29:18

sends letters of encouragement to Felix. Nothing

29:20

like a murder plot to bring mom and son

29:23

together. So Felix and his

29:25

co-conspirators start meeting regularly to plan the

29:27

murder. And they come up with what they think is a

29:29

genius plan. Their weapon of choice? Poison.

29:33

Because a gunshot would be too loud and too

29:35

messy. Right, right. The place of

29:37

murder? Felix's basement. Nice

29:39

and private. And the date?

29:42

December 29th. Talk

29:44

about ending the year with a bang. I was

29:46

gonna say, around the holidays, that's terrible. Felix

29:49

also starts seeing Rasputin again as a way

29:51

to regain his trust. He

29:53

tells Rasputin he has an illness and needs

29:55

his holiness to cure him. Rasputin,

29:58

of course, is more than happy to oblige. The

30:00

holy man still has the ear of the Tsar

30:02

and Tsarina, but even he can see the writing on the

30:04

walls. So the more powerful

30:06

allies he can collect, the better. Felix

30:09

is sure his mission is the right move for

30:11

him and for Russia, but his wife, Arina, disagrees.

30:15

She's been staying at the family home in Crimea with

30:17

his mother, and a few weeks before the murder date, she

30:19

writes him a desperate letter, begging him not to

30:22

do it. He's torn.

30:24

He hates that she's so upset, but she's

30:26

right to be concerned. Besides

30:29

the fact that killing anyone is illegal, Felix

30:31

is planning to murder one of the most famous

30:33

men in Russia, and a powerful

30:35

ally of the Tsar. If that's

30:37

not a one-way ticket to hell, I don't know what is.

30:40

Yeah, not smart. But

30:42

on the same day he receives a letter from

30:44

Arina, he gets another letter from his mother. Her

30:47

tone is very different. She

30:50

tells her son that killing Rasputin is

30:53

urgent and imperative. And

30:55

now I'm imagining daughter-in-law and mother-in-law in

30:57

the same room writing furiously to Felix,

31:00

and I can't get them out of my head. And

31:02

then raising each other to the door to send it

31:04

off. Yeah, and they're like pushing each other like, no,

31:06

no, and grabbing this last stamp. Yeah. Felix

31:08

has his wife telling him to come home, and

31:11

his mother telling him to kill the bastard. And

31:13

we know which woman he decides to follow. Otherwise

31:16

we wouldn't be talking about him today. Felix's

31:19

mind is made up. He will

31:21

take down Rasputin for his mother and

31:24

for Mother Russia. His

31:26

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off your next order. It's

32:22

just after midnight on December 30th, 1916, and

32:26

Felix is walking into the Yusupov Palace, but

32:28

not through the flashy front gates. He's

32:31

sneaking into a side door. Behind

32:33

him is his guest for the night. And

32:36

yep, this is where we started our

32:39

story. I remember.

32:41

But we do. Now

32:43

Brooke, what happens next is still hotly debated

32:45

to this day. Ooh okay. Only the handful

32:47

of people who were there know the truth

32:50

but this is the version that Felix shares in his

32:52

memoir. Okay. And the main person who could

32:54

challenge this account is dead. Yeah. So

32:56

here we go. Felix leads

32:59

Rasputin into his basement sitting room and tries

33:01

to keep calm. It's like walking

33:03

your friend into a surprise party. You don't want to give

33:05

it away. Right. Except Felix's

33:07

surprise is a little different. He's

33:09

hiding the fact that there is cyanide in the cakes

33:12

he's laid out for this evening. But both

33:14

have cake. Exactly. It's more like a surprise

33:16

murder party. Yeah. Felix tries to stay calm

33:18

but Rasputin is on high alert these days.

33:21

He knows there's a big target on his back. But

33:24

Felix is hoping the time he spent with Rasputin

33:26

over these last few weeks will keep him from

33:28

suspecting that anything may be amiss. Still,

33:31

as Felix pours tea for the

33:33

holy man, he can barely keep his

33:35

hands from shaking. When Rasputin asks if

33:37

he's alright, Felix stops and does his

33:40

best impression of Ross Geller drinking margarita.

33:43

I'm fine! Felix

33:45

is so frazzled that he offers a tray of

33:47

cookies to go with the tea instead of the poisoned cake.

33:49

Oh my god. Rasputin politely

33:51

declines. So then Felix offers up

33:53

his special cakes. But Rasputin

33:56

rubs his tummy and says they're too sweet

33:58

for him. Uh oh. Which... This

34:00

is how I know I would be dead immediately. I'd be like, cakes? You

34:04

would have taken the cookies too, if we're being honest. I know. I

34:07

know. Felix squeezes out a

34:09

tight smile and sets the cakes down. But

34:11

before long, Rasputin's hunger wins out. He

34:14

eats one little cake, then another,

34:16

and another. Felix

34:19

holds his breath and waits. But the

34:21

guy just keeps eating.

34:24

Felix starts sweating. What is

34:27

taking so long? Maybe the cakes

34:29

didn't have enough poison. So Felix

34:31

moves on to plan B, a poisoned wine

34:33

glass. He's not worried

34:35

about Rasputin turning it down. The holy man

34:38

is in notorious droughts these days. Yeah,

34:40

he should have started with that, honestly.

34:42

Yeah. And sure enough, Rasputin

34:44

does gulp the wine down. But

34:46

still, nothing happens. Wow.

34:49

Felix starts freaking out. I'm betting

34:51

another part of him is like, holy shit, this

34:53

guy might actually be magical. He's not gonna

34:55

die. He's healing himself unknowingly.

34:57

I know. Felix

35:00

continues to wait, hoping that the poison will

35:02

take effect. But it doesn't.

35:05

Wow. Instead, Rasputin asks Felix to

35:07

play the guitar for him. The

35:10

prince agrees and plays guitar for

35:12

over an hour. Oh my god.

35:15

If I were the prince, I would

35:17

be like, I got some bad cyanide.

35:19

Well, that's actually pretty much what some

35:21

historians think. Wait, really? Yeah, apparently that...

35:23

Oh my god. Either got bad cyanide

35:25

or like aspirin that they thought was

35:27

cyanide. Oh, okay. Or that Rasputin is

35:30

actually superhuman. One of those three. It's

35:32

gotta be one of those three. But

35:35

finally though, Felix reaches his breaking point.

35:37

He is done waiting. He

35:39

runs upstairs and borrows a gun from one

35:42

of his co-conspirators. Felix heads

35:44

back downstairs and tells Rasputin to say a

35:46

prayer. The holy man does as he's

35:48

told and bends his head down to his chest.

35:51

Felix lifts the gun at the praying man,

35:53

but he hesitates. Somehow killing

35:55

a man with poison felt easier. I

35:58

bet I did. But Felix can hear... his

36:00

mother's words ringing in his ears, telling

36:02

Rasputin his imperative there is no other

36:04

choice. And this will be

36:06

the moment he goes down in history as the hero. He

36:10

grasps the gun tighter and pulls

36:12

the trigger. Rasputin's

36:14

blood splatters all over the white bear

36:16

fur carpet. Felix has finally

36:18

done it. It feels exhilarating

36:20

and sickening all at the same time. His

36:24

accomplices come running in when they hear the gunshot.

36:27

They're stunned. Rasputin is

36:29

actually dead. They

36:31

help Felix move the body off the

36:34

rug because bloodstains are notoriously impossible to

36:36

get out. That's true. That's true.

36:38

They head upstairs. But then Felix stops.

36:41

He goes back down to double check the body. When

36:43

he gets there, he bends down to take

36:45

a closer look. And that's when,

36:48

according to Felix, Rasputin's eyes

36:50

pop open. Wait, what? Yeah,

36:52

it seems that somehow Rasputin has survived

36:55

multiple poisonings and a gunshot wound.

36:58

Felix starts to panic. He's running

37:00

out of options. He

37:02

rushes upstairs to get help. And when he and

37:04

a friend come back down a second time, the

37:06

body is gone. Oh my god. Apparently,

37:09

a bloody Rasputin crawled across

37:11

the floor and out of the room without

37:14

any of them noticing. Wow. Felix

37:16

runs and spots Rasputin crawling on all fours

37:18

up the stairs and out to the courtyard.

37:21

Before he can escape the grounds for good,

37:23

one of Felix's accomplices runs out with the

37:25

gun. He fires off a shot

37:27

and misses. Oh my god.

37:29

Another shot. He misses again. It's like

37:32

a real life Coen Brothers movie. I

37:34

was good. This whole thing is like a movie. Yeah,

37:36

it's absolutely absurd. Yeah. His

37:39

fourth and final shot hits Rasputin in the

37:41

head, finally killing him. Wow.

37:44

Felix feels relief and

37:46

pride. But the eye just killed

37:48

my enemy high wears off quickly when he sees all the

37:50

blood. And given all the

37:53

gunshots, it's likely the entire neighborhood heard

37:55

what happened. Yeah. Tonight's

37:57

been a real shit show. Felix

38:00

his carefully crafted plan is ruined.

38:03

Now, they'll have to improvise. So

38:07

Brooke, the murder aftermath is about as wacky

38:09

and confusing as the murder plot itself, so

38:11

I'm gonna give you the Cliff Notes version.

38:13

Okay. A police officer comes to

38:15

Felix's palace not long after the murder, and

38:18

Felix gets a big dose of reality. Murder

38:21

is illegal. And even

38:23

more, he's just murdered the Czar's favorite holy

38:25

man. Which means he has to

38:27

come up with a damn good alibi, along with

38:30

a cover story for the gunshots and the blood

38:32

on his floor. Good luck, bud. He

38:34

chooses the dog ate my homework excuse,

38:36

except here it's a dog was barking

38:39

so one of my drunken party guests

38:41

shot him excuse. Oh my God. If

38:44

I were the cop, I'd be like, well, I'm taking your jail for

38:46

that anyway. So there, you joke on you. Oh! Yup.

38:49

After the fatal shooting, Felix's co-conspirators

38:51

dumped Rasputin's body in the nearby

38:53

river. And one of them

38:56

was so impressed with what he did that

38:58

he brags about it to some people afterwards.

39:00

The police soon get wind of what happened

39:02

and they launch an investigation. So

39:04

Felix switches to damage control mode. He

39:06

runs around to police officers and government officials

39:09

and tells them a made up tale about

39:11

his party. But the only thing

39:13

they killed last night was the dance floor.

39:15

Hey-o! Oh yeah. What'd I say?

39:17

Been there, done that. Got him. For the most

39:19

part, they believe his story. Until more

39:22

holes start popping up. Like when the

39:24

police intercepts some incriminating telegrams addressed to

39:26

Felix and an accomplice. The

39:29

sender basically asks them how the murder went. Yeah,

39:31

telegrams aren't really the best way

39:33

to communicate murder plans at

39:35

all. Yeah. It's like Googling how to hide

39:37

a body. I know. Like, just don't

39:40

do it. Yeah. And then

39:42

Felix pulls the ultimate suspicious guy move. He

39:45

tries to flee to Crimea, where his parents are.

39:47

But he stopped at the train station and told he

39:49

cannot leave the city. And the hits

39:51

just keep on coming. The next

39:53

day, Rasputin's body is found frozen in

39:55

a river. The Zorina

39:57

wants the men hanged for killing Rasputin.

40:00

Wow. But the czar goes light. He

40:02

just exiles Felix to a remote estate at

40:04

the far corner of Russia. And most of his

40:06

other conspirators get off scot-free. My God,

40:09

that's nothing. I know. Little slaps

40:11

on the wrists. Yeah. The

40:13

news of Rasputin's murder spreads like wildfire.

40:16

And pretty soon a lot of nobles are

40:18

singing, ding dong, the holy witch is dead.

40:21

They're thrilled about his death. But

40:24

the people in other classes, they view his

40:26

death differently. They see Rasputin

40:28

as a peasant who was killed for becoming too

40:30

powerful. To them, this is

40:32

yet another sign that the aristocracy is

40:35

corrupt and needs to be taken down. Yeah.

40:38

Plus, hundreds of thousands of Russians

40:40

are still starving and dying for

40:42

their country. They've had enough,

40:44

and Rasputin's death just adds more fuel to

40:47

the fire. Russia's

40:49

class struggles implode, and all hell

40:51

breaks loose. People

40:53

are screaming for coups and rebellions. Protesters

40:56

talk of revolution and rumors of death threats

40:58

to the monarchs. Over 100,000

41:00

protesters storm the capital. And

41:03

when the government sends soldiers to stop

41:05

the unrest, the soldiers end up joining

41:07

the protest instead. Wow. Which is a

41:10

big tipping point. Yeah. Yeah,

41:12

I bet. Together, they burn buildings

41:14

and free prisoners. The

41:16

unhappy subjects demand a new government for

41:18

the people. And they mean business.

41:21

Prince Felix is forced to watch from afar. Because

41:24

all that he thought he was fighting for, the monarchy,

41:27

his own fame and glory, burns

41:30

to the ground. It's

41:36

spring 1917. Thirty-year-old

41:39

Prince Felix Yusupov is back at the

41:41

family's St. Petersburg Palace, and he's not

41:43

alone. He's walking with a small

41:45

group of noble ladies down to his basement,

41:47

the room where it all happened. It's

41:51

been months since he was last here on that fateful

41:53

night with Rasputin. But everything looks about

41:55

the same. Probably minus some blood,

41:57

though. Yeah, I hope so. Now you might

41:59

be thinking... Wait, wasn't Felix

42:01

just banished? Oh yeah. And

42:03

yes, yes he was. But,

42:05

just a few months after he left, a

42:08

full on revolution broke out. The

42:10

monarchy was squashed. Nicholas

42:13

was forced to abdicate the throne. And

42:15

he, Alex and their kids, are now under house

42:17

arrest. The new provisional government

42:19

doesn't give a shit who killed Rasputin. If

42:22

anything, I imagine they're like, thanks dude,

42:24

you did us a real solid. Damn.

42:27

So Felix is back, living scot-free. Even

42:30

better, he's now a household name. Everyone

42:33

in Russia knows who killed Rasputin. The

42:36

prince strolls around the room and

42:38

recounts the excitement of that night to his dinner

42:40

death. Maybe for the

42:42

hundredth time. Probably. Now I should

42:45

mention that some historians, and myself, think

42:47

Felix embellished his accounts of the murder

42:49

in order to boost his reputation. Of

42:51

course he did. It's

42:54

real convenient when the other person is dead.

42:56

Yeah. But either way, it worked.

42:59

Felix is now famous. He grabs

43:01

a glass of champagne and makes a toast to

43:03

Russia's future. A future he

43:05

somehow still thinks he saved. How

43:08

broke. This

43:12

isn't the end of Felix's story. A

43:14

few months after that dinner party, he ends up

43:16

having to flee St. Petersburg again. When

43:20

the provisional government collapses, the

43:22

new communist Bolshevik Party comes to power,

43:24

which involves the ultimate doom for the

43:26

nobility, and throws St. Petersburg

43:28

into absolute chaos again. Well,

43:31

when you got a name that sounds like bullshit, I feel

43:33

like that makes sense. Yeah, you're not

43:35

wrong. Pretty soon,

43:37

Felix finds soldiers camped out in his

43:39

palace. So he's like, yeah,

43:41

I'm gonna dip. The following

43:44

summer, Nicholas, Alex, and their

43:46

family are all killed by members

43:48

of the Bolshevik Party. Oh

43:50

my god. And now, in West Asia, despite

43:52

what the animated 90s cartoon tells us, Felix

43:56

and his wife end up living the rest of their lives

43:58

in exile in Paris. It's a

44:00

far cry from his glory days as a powerful

44:02

prince, but Felix still has his fame.

44:05

And in his mind, glory. Movies

44:08

are made about him. Stories are

44:10

told and retold around the dinner table, and

44:12

on this very podcast. How have I never

44:14

heard of this man? Until right now.

44:17

You clearly don't go to dinners in Paris. I

44:19

guess not. That's on me. I mean,

44:21

even if you didn't know the guy, the

44:23

history books have not forgotten the man

44:25

who killed Rasputin. So even

44:27

if Felix's life didn't quite turn out

44:29

as he expected, in the end,

44:32

he still got what he wanted. So

44:39

Brooke, how are you feeling about Felix? What

44:41

are your thoughts, feelings, emotions? I mean,

44:44

Felix seems like an idiot, let's be honest.

44:46

He's the idiot of the story, right? He is

44:48

the idiot of the story. And he... talk about

44:50

just like, failing up. I know. And

44:53

like, I will say this retelling of the

44:55

murder makes him sound really incapable

44:57

of murdering someone. Yeah. I

44:59

think it's insane that, you know, it's this elaborate plan

45:01

and the elaborate plan is to just

45:04

have a fake party with Kate. It's

45:06

like, that's... you gotta think

45:08

harder. Yeah. But a

45:11

fun fact. MGM actually made a

45:13

movie about Rasputin's murder, not Anastasia.

45:16

And Felix sued them for libel based on

45:18

how they portrayed his wife. Do you

45:20

think he won or not? No.

45:23

He did. Really? MGM

45:25

had to pay him the equivalent of

45:27

over $2 million in today's dollars. When

45:29

was this? This was in 1932. Oh.

45:33

Actually, fun fact about that. You know how in

45:35

movies they'll say any like,

45:37

relation to real characters is not

45:39

intentional and it's like fictionalized? That

45:42

actually started because of this lawsuit.

45:44

Really? Yeah. Wow.

45:47

Talk about a legacy. Oh, God. Frickin'

45:50

Felix, I swear to God. And of course, you know,

45:52

we have to unpack Rasputin. Like he's

45:54

the only one of the story that I'd heard about, well, in

45:56

Anastasia. Anastasia, yeah. Because of the movie. But

45:58

I mean, pop culture is always... referring to him as

46:00

a villain. And I don't necessarily disagree.

46:02

Yeah. He's always like portrayed as

46:05

this creepazoid, which he was in

46:07

real life. But if this

46:09

happened today, if Rasputin was a person today, there would 100%

46:11

be a cult documentary about him. Oh, for

46:16

sure. And you wouldn't shop about it. Oh, I

46:18

would love every second. But

46:20

I agree. I don't think his

46:22

intentions were bad. Yeah, he's a creep,

46:25

but he's not a complete idiot creep.

46:27

Although anyone that just sits

46:29

while somebody plays a guitar for them for

46:31

an hour, maybe it was his favorite song. He's

46:35

like, I'll never get sick of it. And the prince is like, damn

46:37

it. Are you sure? He's like, do you

46:40

want more cake? He's like, why aren't you

46:42

eating? Like, that's rule number one. Yeah, make

46:44

sure the person is eating what they're serving.

46:46

Yes. Yeah. Follow

46:53

even the Royals on the Wondery app, Amazon

46:55

Music or wherever you get your podcasts. You

46:57

can listen to every episode of even the

46:59

Royals early and ad free right now by

47:01

joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or

47:03

on Apple podcasts. Before you go, tell us

47:06

about yourself by completing a short survey at

47:08

wondery.com/survey. This

47:14

is how to get away with Rasputin's

47:16

murder. Our episode on Prince Stelos. We use many

47:19

sources on researching our stories, including

47:21

but not limited to Rasputin, Faith, Power

47:23

and the Twilight of the Roman Ops

47:26

by Douglas Smith and Lost Thunder

47:28

by Priscilla Keith-O. You

47:30

can follow us on social at

47:32

Arisha Simmer-Williams and Atrof Simfren. I'm

47:35

Arisha Simmer-Williams and I'm Brooke Simfren.

47:37

Corinne Wallace wrote and produced this

47:39

episode, Story Editing by Andrew Barbeau

47:41

and Found Designs by John Boyd.

47:44

Your associate producer is Hannah Ward.

47:46

Our coordinating producer is Taylor Snippen and

47:48

our managing producer is Cecilia Martin. Rachel

47:51

Engelman and Julie Magruder are our producers.

47:53

Our executive producers are Jenny Lower-Bachmann, Jenny

47:55

Bloom, Ansha Louis and Erin O'Haready. www.mooji.org

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