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Family Secrets is a production of I Heart

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Radio. I'm

0:11

Danny Shapiro and this is family

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Secrets, the secrets that are kept

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from us, the secrets we keep from

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others, and the secrets we keep

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from ourselves. I've

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heard from so many about your own

0:24

family secrets and realize that what

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we are creating for each other on this podcast

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is a community, a community for

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those who are looking for a safe and supportive

0:34

space to unburden themselves. To

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that end, we've created a number for listeners

0:39

to call in to record stories

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to share here in this space.

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This week, I'd like to share a few

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of those stories from our community. Thanks

0:49

for listening. My

0:51

secret is one that

0:54

most of my family is aware of if they have to

0:56

keep from me for about thirty

0:59

years with out even a hint

1:01

of what it was. Um, So I

1:04

grew up without my knowing my father. My

1:06

mother always told me that he was just

1:09

too young for a child, and

1:11

when she learned of her being pregnant,

1:13

he just disappeared one day. Um

1:16

it turned out that he actually

1:18

wasn't that young. She had told me nineteen.

1:21

He was in fact twenty five, and

1:24

the reason he disappeared was because

1:27

he was expecting a child with his

1:30

future wife to be UM,

1:32

so he chose them over

1:35

us. So I have a

1:37

half sister who I grew up with two

1:39

towns away from and had

1:42

known knowledge of her. I actually only

1:44

learned her about three years ago when she herself

1:47

contacted me. UM. We

1:49

have since met and have gotten to know

1:52

each other. It's been wonderful. But

1:55

UM even further tunnels

1:57

because obviously the learning of this has opened

1:59

up a lot of facts

2:02

and information regarding my

2:04

entry into life that I never knew

2:06

love. UM So, when my mother

2:09

became pregnant and my father

2:11

left, she actually was institutionalized

2:14

for the first couple months of

2:16

her pregnancy. UM.

2:18

So that was something I didn't know. And

2:22

furthermore, we actually have a third half

2:24

sister. Both our mothers

2:26

are aware of this girl, but neither

2:29

of them know what her name is, and my

2:31

father, our father, is

2:34

keeping that information to himself at this

2:36

time, so we have no

2:38

knowledge of her right now. But

2:41

I have since spoken to to

2:44

my father. UM not quite ready

2:46

to meet him. It's it's still

2:49

a pretty raw, sore

2:53

emotion that I'm experiencing here.

2:56

I've only been about three years

2:59

with this information, and so and

3:01

speaking to him was fairly recently. UM.

3:04

But yeah, this podcast

3:07

is pretty great and it's

3:09

been extremely helpful as

3:12

as I go through this myself.

3:15

It's definitely been uh kind

3:17

of a therapy. So thank you. Hi

3:20

there. UM. So here's my

3:22

secret. UM. Recently,

3:25

my mother in law passed away. UM.

3:28

She was diagnosed with

3:31

her cancer and less

3:34

than six months later she had

3:36

died. UM. So the

3:39

secret that I'm keeping is,

3:42

UM, that's now that she's

3:44

gone, I have no dinner

3:46

with my husband UM to help take care

3:48

of my father in law and

3:51

who has Alzheimer's, and

3:54

we have not told him that she

3:56

has passed. UM.

3:59

It's gary to think that he

4:02

doesn't know, but we can't

4:05

risk the factor or the chance

4:07

of him um something and

4:09

having something worse than having his Alzheimer's

4:13

become worse than it is and than

4:16

him following her to

4:18

the grave sooner than UM needed.

4:22

So that's the secret to me deal

4:24

with day constantly. And when he asks

4:27

where everybody is, uh, we just

4:29

say that everybody's okay.

4:32

That's your safe, You're

4:35

at home and everybody is okay. So

4:38

that's a secret. SPEAK. I

4:41

want to thank you for this podcast

4:45

and the community that you have

4:48

brought together. Um,

4:50

I'm part of this community, and that I

4:53

was pretty to a family secret. Right

4:56

before I turned twenty one, my mother

4:58

told me that I had a

5:00

full sister. UM.

5:02

I was raised as an only child, so this

5:04

came as a huge surprise to me. But

5:08

I found out that my parents had dated

5:10

in the high school. My mother had gotten pregnant

5:13

and her parents forced her to give

5:15

my sister up and she

5:18

kept that secret from

5:21

most most of us UM

5:25

for twenty years. And

5:28

once she told me, she made me keep

5:30

that secret because she was

5:33

so embarrassed by what

5:35

had happened. She told

5:37

me I wasn't to look for her, I was not

5:40

to tell anyone, and I

5:42

kept that secret for more than thirty

5:45

years. But my

5:48

sister got ahold of

5:51

an ancestry kid and

5:55

I was able to find a cousin

5:58

who put her in contact with my father,

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and the day before

6:04

my birthday in two

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thousand eighteen, I spoke

6:08

to my sister for the first time, and

6:11

then I met her on

6:14

my birthday this past summer. And

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I guess what I wanted to say to the people

6:20

in this community is that some of

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these stories

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that began with secrets

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began with embarrassment

6:29

and pain can really

6:32

have wonderful outcomes. My sister

6:34

and I have developed

6:37

a wonderful relationship and

6:39

we talked on the phone regularly, and meeting

6:42

her and her daughter was just

6:45

absolutely wonderful and healing,

6:48

and I wish for

6:50

that kind of healing for every listener

6:54

to this podcast. It can happen.

6:57

So again, thank you for bringing this kind of community

6:59

together and I look forward

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to hearing more listener stories. If

7:15

you'd like to share your story, call one

7:17

eight eight eight Secret zero

7:20

and record your story. We won't

7:22

be able to run all the stories, but we do want

7:24

to shine a light on as many as we can. The

7:27

number again is one eight eight

7:29

Secret and then the numeral zero.

7:44

For more podcasts for my Heart Radio, visit

7:46

the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast,

7:49

or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.