In this three-chapter bumper episode:

Fireeyes trains with the muscular, experienced Vader under Kan's watchful eye. We meet Mace Window and his Earthling boyfriend, Seemore, and missiles are fired just like in the Cuban missile crisis, but more in space. Like, Hab, Jar Jar the Gun, R2, C-Three-Pee and Chewie search for the precious emerald. Leia has a pretty girl lighstaber, of COURSE, inspiring Lucy to describe the lightsaber of her Horse Girl dreams. After sending in the Wookie to scout for danger, Luke, Hands, 32D2 and Leigha battle a singing, muscled space plant, and Luke loses a hand. So! Much! Happens!

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Credit to travisskywalker58 for this excellent fic. You can read it in full on FanFiction.net.

Our fabulous theme music is by Wolf & Chain. 

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