This week I'm talking again with Lauren Hughes.  Successful CEOs need to make fast decisions, but worrying about the consequences slows them down. Indecision and lack of action lead to consequences of their own. That's why we are talking with Lauren Hughes about failing fast & radical self-acceptance - What she thought was a weakness, and how it became her superpower (7-figure Secrets)

Listen in to hear about:

• Making fast decisions
• How she likes to fail fast and get fast results
• Radical self-acceptance: We are perfect just as we are
• Have the courage to accept things as they are so you can address them asap
• Telling yourself a more empowering story
• How she learned what a panic attack was, and what she had to give up to stop the cycle
• Catching the warning signs
• What she thought was a weakness, and how it became her super power
• Changing the story of what failure means
• The mind is powerful
• It’s normal - people just don’t talk about it because we think we need to be perfect
• Successful entrepreneurs don’t quit 
• Entrepreneurs are inherently Imposters and why this isn’t a bad thing
• The “ice cube principle”

You can learn more about GUEST here:

• www.luxurycoloradolifestyle.com
• linkedin.com/in/laurenschneidewind
• www.facebook.com/soldbylaurenhughes
• https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCByDIyz6nRS5CeW73IRz3xQ
• And: Voyage ATL, Hypopotemus, Best and Brightest

*****

If you are a driven entrepreneur who’s:

• At the top of your game, yet find your consistent successes aren’t feeling like you thought they would,
• And you are ready to root out any vestiges of imposter syndrome self-sabotage that are holding you back from expanding out of your comfort zone and into your next level,
• AND you are ready for success that truly feels like success

Book a call with me.

We'll have an intimate conversation about you and your business. We’ll explore what what might be holding you back from enjoying your success. You’ll leave with your next step.

If you still need more help at the end of the call, and it makes sense to both of us - we'll talk about what it would look like to work together.

If this sounds good to you, click the Book Trina link ==> https://bit.ly/BookTrina

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TRANSCRIPT

79-Lauren Hughes: Radical self acceptance - What she thought was a weakness, and how it became her super power (7-figure Secrets)

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[00:00:00]

[00:00:56] Trina: welcome back to the field guide to awesome folks. In my [00:01:00] last episode, I spoke again with Willow Sana. Willow has been a self-employed creative for over 20 years. She's a sought after business coach who empowers visionary entrepreneurs with heart-centered action. And we talked about what you need to do before you can show up powerfully and compassionately for others.

If you missed it, make sure to go back and check it out.

But don't go yet. Folks. My next guest is Lauren Hughes, serial entrepreneur, realtor, and investor, currently working on her fifth business. Hugh's capital. She started it last year and she's planning to grow it to be over 10 million within the next five to seven years. Lauren and I are talking about radical. Self-acceptance and about what she thought was a weakness and how it became her superpower. Join me in welcoming, Lauren Hughes

[00:01:47] open loop

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[00:01:48] Trina Serrecchia: I want to go back really quickly to talk about when you talk about decisions and from my research, from working with high level people, [00:02:00] the rapidity of. Decisions making fast decisions and failing fast.

Now I use fail as

[00:02:09] Lauren Huges: no. I like to fail fast because it's not, I don't see failure as a negative. Right. My negative is when you quit and you quit without a real reason. And that's that's the negative, but failure.

[00:02:21] Trina Serrecchia: It's, you've just learned one way that it hasn't worked yet. Exactly.

[00:02:25] Lauren Huges: And next time you're going to be faster.

[00:02:28] Trina Serrecchia: Yeah. And it's, it's like you're creating a field guide. It's like, well, that doesn't work. So let's try this new thing. When things don't work, as you expect. It sounds as if that you were telling yourself a different story than what you would have told yourself earlier in your career.

[00:02:46] Lauren Huges: Yes. I would have told myself a gentler story, I think at the beginning and it's not, and I think it takes maybe more courage or maybe. I in order to have courage, you have to [00:03:00] be afraid, I suppose. So, when at the beginning I think I tried to, put stuff under the rug and not oh, that's not important versus, now it's yeah, you know what?

I'm going to have bad thoughts, or I'm going to have bumps that aren't great. Or, this little dumpster fire needs to be dealt with now. Let's not push it off for another week or, and something. And just accepting that. That's just me versus trying to like, oh, that part doesn't exist. And the reality oh, no, it does.

It's just going to get bigger if you don't address it.

[00:03:34] Trina Serrecchia: Yeah. And early on, it's easy to avoid. And hide and bury things as you develop as an entrepreneur, as a leader you learn that, you can't ignore those things because they do get worse. They do, they do get worse. And then as you get further on in your business, you realize that.

You know what? I don't have to be afraid [00:04:00] of it. I can deal with it now. It may be unpleasant now, but it's going to be a lot worse later. So let me take care of it now. And it's okay.

[00:04:07] Lauren Huges: Yeah. And I think that's the biggest thing is because before I was, so I think, so it comes back to the

[00:04:14] Trina Serrecchia: story of let's hide that because I'm embarrassed about it.

I'm scared about it. I'm not able to deal with it. And so the new story is it's okay. I can do something about it now. It's more empowered. Yeah, the story that you're telling yourself as more empowered.

[00:04:30] Lauren Huges: Brilliant. I love that it's more empowered. And I think that, that goes a lot with, self-acceptance and we don't have to be these perfect people because there that doesn't exist.

And, and just because, I'm not a great speller doesn't mean. Cool. I use spellcheck or, it's not negative. I think, it's not, we don't live in the, leave it to beaver era anymore where people are perfect or consider, we're [00:05:00] just who we are and it's not negative or positive.

It's just, we just are who we are. And we're perfect. Just the way that we are which might be a little bit. Shay, but I think it it's very true. It's very true. Accepted.

[00:05:14] Trina Serrecchia: Perfection does not exist. Perfection keeps us in inaction and it keeps us in anxiety and it keeps us in shame. When we let go of the need for perfection and we allow ourselves to just be who we are.

And, and knowing that as who we are is enough are what we had originally thought of as our weaknesses or our failures. As human creatures are actually our super powers because it allows us to think a little differently to solve problem, solve a little differently. And to feel enough because we are enough.

Yeah.

[00:05:56] Lauren Huges: Yeah, very important words right there. And it's, it's, [00:06:00] we are enough and perfection doesn't exist. I know that we're about to run out of time, but I have actually, I had a complex with being perfect for a long time. And it would tell us about

[00:06:11] Trina Serrecchia: that story. I have time if you have

[00:06:13] Lauren Huges: time.

I do. And I actually put myself in the hospital twice because of it. Because of anxiety because of trying so hard to be perfect. I then learned what a panic attack was. Oh, body goes numb and you think you're dying, but it's all. It's all in your head and discovery. It was fun and an expensive little endeavor, but I'm glad to know I wasn't dying.

So that was the good part. But when your whole body goes numb, you don't know. You're just like, I can't feel my arms. And that actually happened to me. I think between 20 and 22, it was kind of too. And then I had to take a step back. Cause it's this is not, this is not productive. If B and I was when I was in college and I [00:07:00] was struggling to not fail my classes.

And it kind of goes back to the, I struggle on tests and actually one of the panic attacks was in a calendar. Calculus exam and I just panicked. And so, and I think that's when I have to start to give up this whole perfection that you think that you have to be perfect or I did for a very long time.

And. But it was caused like putting yourself into the hospital. Most people don't do that. So I'm really good at failing fast or, having to address some or I like, I'm very intense maybe. And so I'm going to bring something to the extreme, which is good to know about my personality. And, but it made me, I had to deal with it.

This, with this, this is not like you, you don't want to keep doing this. And now, I haven't had a panic attack. I don't think in. I don't know, 10 years or so, but I know the warning signs and that's when I, that's when you get your self reflection and you can. But, and letting go of the perfection and if something is messed [00:08:00] up, it's okay.

We can fix it. And that took me a long time to understand if that makes sense.

[00:08:09] Trina Serrecchia: It does. I mean, perfection is, and it comes from, our childhood or, we can't show weakness. We have to be perfect to fit in. And it sounds that as you released that need for perfection, you became healthy.

Absolutely. You learn to reflect more. You grew as a human being and you started to see what were your weaknesses? What were your failures as superpowers? You're you're. Different way of thinking as a superpower, the way which

[00:08:49] Lauren Huges: is it's, it is a super power. If I, I would not be where I'm at. If I wasn't just the way that I am with, Different which is, it takes a long time to, [00:09:00] accept our uniqueness, which is legitimately our superpower.

[00:09:05] Trina Serrecchia: Yeah. I want to give you some kudos on, actually getting to the point where you were having panic attacks that you need even needed to be hospitalized for and finding your way out. What was the. Early on. What was the key to that with? Just recognizing that you had panic attacks and stopping the,

[00:09:32] Lauren Huges: stopping the cycle.

Yeah. And I would say the cycle. It, it's that, it's almost that imposter syndrome, I think, but when you don't deal with it, it gets to a point where, you can't feel your body or I would. And so if I ever. And that's what happens when you skirt stuff under the rug auger. That's what happens when I skirt stuff under the rug.

And so I noticed that I have a cycle if I get, if I start to [00:10:00] get anxious. And it's all because I don't want to fail. Right. And so that's where my, my anxiety comes from is I want to produce well, or at the time I was like, I have to be perfect. I can't have any flaw oh my gosh. If I have lipstick on my teeth, it'll be the worst day of my life.

When in reality, It doesn't matter. Probably no one noticed if they did, they're going to forget within two minutes because it's really not that important. And so with that cycle, I learned that, if I start to get anxious that's why I take little, like many walks if I remove myself from a situation and then it's, and then it's fine.

But it took me a long time to, realize. Like all the triggers were coming from me, not wanting to fail or trying to be perfect. Me trying to be, fit in. And when I was not doing that, like failing my calculus exam it was me. Or that concern of, oh my gosh, I'm not going to fit in.

Someone's going to judge me. [00:11:00] I'm going to look stupid. And so I think now it's, I, you deal with it head on and if you fail, just take it again. It's okay. Try, it's, as long as, and I changed the town, my mindset thought of failure and, failure, failure's not a bad thing, but knowing if I start to get angry that's usually the cause.

And it goes back to, when I was little, saying that I was not going to succeed. And so it's I know the warning signs now and it's just, and why, I don't think failure is like a negative, it's a learning experience. Which is the mind's very. And understanding how to like, just make small little tweaks.

It has helped. And one of the biggest things that's helped is just listening to other people's stories with the books on tape

[00:11:46] Trina Serrecchia: and knowing

[00:11:46] Lauren Huges: that you're not alone. Yes. And that it's normal. Just no one ever talks about it. No one ever admits it, but. We're all, we're all very similar in the, the struggles that we go through and we, different people are struggling with different things at different times and [00:12:00] at different degrees, but, we aren't alone and we just don't talk about it very much because we have this perception of, we have to, be perfect.

[00:12:10] Trina Serrecchia: Yeah. Yeah. None of us are perfect people. Not even you, not me. So Lauren, thank you so much for being so candid, so vulnerable and sharing about your story. What do you have coming up in the next. 12 to 18 months that you're excited about.

[00:12:32] Lauren Huges: Ooh. Yeah, that's a great, that is a great question. So I am now working a hundred percent on or a full-time I should say which I define as 40 to 60 hours, which is kind of a lot mostly focused on real estate.

Expanding the mine. Real estate portfolio and expanding the, the amount of real estate I move in a given year in Denver and Boulder, [00:13:00] Colorado.

[00:13:02] Trina Serrecchia: Awesome.

[00:13:03] Lauren Huges: Yeah. So that's my, that's the primary focus right now, which I'm really excited about. And it's, it's nice that, well, I loved it for a long time and I'm glad that.

We've reached this point and being able to expand at the rate we are which is, it's, it's not, what does that expansion look like? Yeah, absolutely. So the expansion from my investment portfolio, it, it took a, it took, I think. Oh, darn near 10 years to get to a million dollar portfolio.

And now I'm able to grow it at an over a million dollars a year. But it didn't start that way. And so now we're working on the next five years or so to get it up to 10 million. But it. It took a very long time to get the wheels, wheels turning. And we're right at the cusp of, I guess, scaling would be the proper term.

We're right at the cusp of, [00:14:00] working 12 years on this project, it's now starting to really move. So there's 12 years behind the scenes that no one saw. And to get to the point that now. Now it's just, it, it looks easy. And so that's, it's not but we're at the point where, the perception is it's easy, which is a good place to be because the struggle is it was 12 years,

[00:14:24] Trina Serrecchia: 12 years.

That there is a saying that, you have to work repeat something 10,000 times to be an expert. And you've, it sounds like you've done that. And over already in what you've done, what you're doing and. I think looking at when you are going through those 10,000 steps, even if you're early on in your entrepreneurial journey.

Imposter syndrome is going to come up. If you were doing anything new, like you're going from where you are [00:15:00] now a million dollar business to multi-million dollar business. Right. You're, you're going to have to find new ways to do that. And, and that means that as entrepreneurs we're always. Imposters, because we're doing something where we're trying to do something that we haven't done yet.

We're creating solutions that haven't been created before. And so we're always going into. Try stepping into our next level self who we, who are million dollar multi-million dollar self is, is very different from who we are now. And, but slowly step-by-step, we're embodying that person. And so until we're there until we have it, then yes, we are a little bit of an imposter.

And something that I've seen in most. Of the people that I've worked with is that they're always trying to grow and expand [00:16:00] and

[00:16:02] Lauren Huges: always growing and growing, expanding. I think you hit the nail on the head is entrepreneurs by definition. We kind of are imposters a little bit because we're trying something new.

And so it's always, we, it is kind of can be seen as an imposter and that's, we have to embrace that. Instead of letting us it stopped. Yeah. Which I think is, and that's the biggest key to my success or what I think the biggest key has been. And it's not that I have any innate ability or I'm not like this super person it's that I don't quit.

It's that when we get knocked down, we get back up and it's, that part is, I mean, it's, it's simple, but it's not easy. Sounds

[00:16:45] Trina Serrecchia: great up and are happy all the time. There've been times that I've fallen and you just sit there, cry for a second. You climb back up and sing up, but I don't want it, but I got gotta.

And then you're up and then you're off and running again.

[00:16:57] Lauren Huges: Absolutely. Yes. And it's, it's all [00:17:00] about, getting up and doing it again the next day. And that's what makes that imposter. Say what you want, let's address it and we'll be better today than you were yesterday. And it's, it's simple, it's not easy,

[00:17:12] Trina Serrecchia: it's simple.

It's not easy. And if you can be 1% better than you were yesterday, if you could do just one little bit that. A little bit better than you did yesterday. And you did that every day for a year, your 365% better then. A year ago. Yeah.

[00:17:38] Lauren Huges: So love that. You said that because that is actually, my goal is to be 1% better.

There's a book atomic habits. Yes. I love that. And it's, and that, that has been a game changer because it's 1% it's not that. 1% changes and I love that that's brilliant. And it's it's baby steps. And, we don't see the progress from day to day, but [00:18:00] from one year. Oh, that's, that's huge.

[00:18:03] Trina Serrecchia: Yeah. Yeah. And there's but ice cube principle is also something that I'm fascinated with. Because, when we do like 1% better, we don't always see the improvement right away. But the ice cube say, if you start at a hundred degrees below freezing, right, and each day you increase the temperature by one degree each day, another degree, but you're not seeing that ice cube melt yet.

Right. You're not seeing that ice cube melt yet. And it can be frustrating. It's like what? I'm increasing the temperature. Why isn't the ice cube melting you're hundred degrees below zero. So each time you increase, you increase, you increase. And then once you get to two degrees below, zero. Below freezing the next couple of degrees, you increase, it's become a habit it's become easier [00:19:00] to do because you've kept up with that.

Then, then once you go up above freezing that ice cube is going to melt fast. And that is what overnight success looks like.

[00:19:13] Lauren Huges: I love that, that I love that. Yeah, cause it's spot on. Yeah,

[00:19:21] Trina Serrecchia: Lauren. Oh goodness. Thank you so much for joining me today. It has been an absolute pleasure. Where can people learn more about.

[00:19:29] Lauren Huges: Yes. Thank you so much. And thank you so much for having me and I love having honest conversations and it's one of my favorite things to do. So I'm on all the social media just joined TechTalk and so I'm so proud of myself. I it's Lauren Hughes, investor realator and investor on any of the social media platforms.

[00:19:51] Trina Serrecchia: And I'll include the links in the show notes. Perfect Lauren. Thank you again.

[00:19:57] Lauren Huges: Thank you so much for having me.

[00:19:59] Interview End[00:19:59] Close Loop outro

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[00:19:59] Trina: [00:20:00] next week, I'll be talking with Connie SCA Vela. Connie is a speaker, author and business and strategic advisor. For CEOs and entrepreneurs seeking a quantum leap in their lives and business simultaneously.

An entrepreneur for 17 years with degrees in theology and physics. She has worked with new startups, fortune five hundreds and Inc 500 companies in healthcare, real estate. Education sports, finance, oil and gas, retail ministry hospitality. Entertainment. And Connie, and I will be talking about becoming the difference maker.

Reverse engineering, her success and niching profitably. It's going to be a fantastic episode folks. So tune in next week. You won't want to miss it.

[00:21:00] [00:22:00]