0:00

Look out. It's on the film

0:02

Stubby Balhead with Hello

0:16

and welcome to Films to be buried with. My name

0:18

is Brett Goldstein. I'm a comedian, an actor,

0:21

a writer, a director, a nutcracker, and I

0:23

love films. As Neil Armstrong

0:25

once said, it's one small step for

0:27

man, one giant leap for mankind,

0:30

and four more avatar sequels for the rest

0:32

of you. Every week I invite a special

0:34

guest over. I tell them they've died, then I get them to

0:36

discuss their life through the films that meant the most

0:38

of them. Previous guests include Jamila, Jamil,

0:40

Mark Comod, Scrubious Pip, and even

0:43

mister Edward Gamble the Third himself.

0:45

But this week my special guest is

0:47

writer, actor, showrunner and director

0:50

Emerald Fanew announcement

0:53

on twenty sixth of February, I'll be doing a big live

0:55

podcast with a very special guest soon to

0:57

be announced at the Islington Town You

1:00

can get your tickets on the Dice app.

1:02

You need to get the Dice app and then you'll find

1:04

your tickets, or you go to a website something like that.

1:06

You'll work it out. If you do enjoy the show

1:09

and you want to support it, help us out and

1:11

get more content, please come and join me

1:13

over at patreon dot com forward slash Brett Goldstick.

1:15

You'll get extra guest questions, you get

1:18

videos, guest list, tickets, recommendations,

1:20

all sorts of stuff. Give it a look over at patreon

1:23

dot com Forward slash Brett Goldstick. Right,

1:26

So Emerald for now. I

1:29

basically love Emerald. There

1:31

I said, it's out there. The woman's

1:33

a genius. I met her a few years ago. We've

1:35

been friends ever since. I recorded this episode

1:38

with her over a year ago. Recorded it very

1:40

early on in the making of this podcast,

1:42

but I've been holding on to it because I wanted to wait until

1:45

all the things that I knew she was about to do

1:47

had happened, which they now have. And

1:50

so basically you probably know her

1:52

from Call the Midwife. I know her

1:54

because she co wrote some of the episodes of Jessica

1:57

Nappitt's excellent Drifters with jess

2:00

and then she went on to show

2:03

run season two of Killing

2:05

Eve, which she got nominated for all

2:07

the awards from everyone. Also,

2:10

you will know her from The Crown, in which

2:12

she plays the naughty one. You know Camilla

2:14

Parker bowls, that home wrecker, I'll never

2:17

forgive her. And since

2:19

then, best of all, she has written

2:21

and directed her own film called

2:24

Promising Young Woman, which

2:26

is fucking brilliant

2:28

and you need it. If you haven't seen this yet, you

2:31

needs to go online now. And what's the trailer for

2:33

Promising Young Woman with Carry Mulligan.

2:35

Oh my god, it's going to blow your mind. You

2:37

won't believe it. Honestly, it's

2:40

brilliant. So anyway, that s

2:42

Emeral did it. There you go. You're in for a

2:44

right treat. I'm glad I've held on

2:46

to this one. You'll love it. Okay,

2:48

So that's it for now. I very much hope you

2:50

enjoy episode seventy eight of

2:53

Films to be Buried With. Hello,

3:06

and welcome to Films to be Buried With. I

3:08

am Brett Goldstein. I am joined today

3:11

by an incredible guest. She's

3:13

an actor. You'd

3:16

know her from Call the Midwife,

3:18

amongst other things. She's

3:20

a comedian. Doesn't

3:22

think she is, but I heard her wedding speech

3:24

and it was one of the best Edinburgh shows I've seen.

3:27

She's a writer, what

3:29

kind of writer? A fucking good one. And

3:32

she's also a show runner,

3:34

the runner currently of the show

3:37

Killing Eve Ladies and Gentlemen. Huge,

3:40

huge, get to have her here. It's

3:42

TV's everruds for now. I

3:47

just clapped myself. I hope it's okay. Of course it

3:49

is. Why wouldn't you if I were you out with every

3:51

day? Thank you for having me brought.

3:53

This is the first podcast I've been on, is

3:56

it? It's the first podcast I've been

3:58

on. And I've been soliciting for years

4:00

and years and hoping that someone would

4:02

ask me, and finally you did. And

4:05

I love your podcast. We can, I say

4:08

that on this you can, and I love

4:10

that it is in this

4:12

me too era. It's sponsored by Victoria's

4:14

Secret because I think you're the obvious

4:17

choice for famous lautery

4:19

provider. Well what else do I wear other

4:21

than that's what you're wearing right now, Victoria's Secret.

4:24

I don't think I knew that, but

4:27

I am absolutely delighted and

4:29

I'm glad that my listener's dressed

4:32

appropriately for the podcast. Thank

4:34

you for coming all the way to my

4:37

house. You're welcome. I've been having

4:39

a lovely nose around Brett's

4:41

house. Anything worth discussing, I

4:44

mean, the thing that really

4:46

drew my eye was on the bookshelf

4:49

Brett has one of only a

4:52

clutch or a handful of books. Is the

4:54

novelization of the Bradley Cooper film

4:57

Limitless, which

5:00

I mean it's a great it's it

5:03

is the bleak House of our time for

5:08

the record, no disrespect, but it's not

5:10

the novel. It's the book of

5:12

which the film was then based, right,

5:14

okay, but it does have a picture of Brady.

5:17

Yes, I believe it was a re release of the

5:19

book for the film. Okay, I

5:21

mean it's great. It's got a lot of weights.

5:24

This is a man who there's a lot of weights,

5:26

keeps fit. He keeps

5:29

setting him in and keeps weights in his house, keeps

5:31

it, keeps it all tight. And then there's a

5:33

beginner's piano book and a little tiny

5:35

piano which is very endearing.

5:39

That's a real beginner's piano. What I realize

5:41

is it's saffable, especially quite hard

5:43

to learn of because there's my fingers

5:45

are too big fit and there's only that two

5:47

octaves. I mean, let us call a spades bade. It's

5:50

a child piano.

5:56

Is it weird when people come in here and they have to

5:58

there's they sort of look at everything in

6:00

your house and kind of analyze your

6:03

personality. Yeah, they're doing it

6:05

because I think that, because

6:07

I'm aware on a podcast, I feel the need

6:10

to like describe what where I am in

6:12

a way that I wouldn't if I was just hanging

6:14

out here. You could also make it up. I suppose,

6:17

how would we know that I don't have limitless

6:19

right? That would be such a

6:21

great thing to make up. Yeah, that'd

6:24

be weird because it's a real slam. I've

6:29

got a plant. You haven't mentioned the plant. It's

6:31

a really depressing dead plant, a very

6:34

dusty again child's

6:36

electric guitar. It feels like you've

6:39

gone in and raided the school of rock. Well,

6:41

let's talk about this. I'd like to talk about lots of

6:43

things with you. Thank you. Okay,

6:45

So you have been show running, which

6:48

for people who don't know what that means, it means sort

6:50

of the head of writing at of

6:53

Killing Eve season two. So I'm

6:56

very, very luckily thanks

6:58

to Phoebe water Bridge, the probably

7:00

the greatest genius of our time and

7:03

the nicest person and the prettiest

7:05

person I know. So

7:09

yeah, so she is obviously doing

7:11

fleabag too, now, which is very exciting. And

7:13

so I am now the head

7:15

writer and execuducer on Killing

7:18

You Series two, which is again

7:20

like what a dream, What a dream

7:22

job. It's just thinking up how to murder

7:25

people in lots of delicious ways, and

7:28

you know, spending very good at you, very

7:30

good at Yeah. I like murdering people a lot.

7:32

I didn't say another list in the introduction.

7:34

Yeah thanks a three time nother list,

7:37

thank you. So the first thing I read of yours was your book

7:39

Monsters. Yeah, oh,

7:41

thank you? I mean Monsters is.

7:43

My favorite review of Monsters was on

7:46

good Reads, which when I feel like self harming at

7:48

three in the morning, I go on good Reads and read all the

7:50

one star or no star reviews and

7:53

one of them, one of the first reviews that came out,

7:55

said this book made me feel physically sick

7:58

and not in a good way. And

8:00

then one of my favorite things ever

8:03

was there was a podcast, a book

8:05

review podcast. I can't remember which one

8:07

it was, and they chose Monsters,

8:10

and the people who do the podcast were like, oh, they

8:12

kind of let me know and said we're doing your

8:14

We're doing your book for the for the

8:16

book club podcast this week. You know, tune in,

8:18

so I was like, oh, great, wonderful, and

8:21

I think I even tweeted it and I was like yeah,

8:24

And I settled down and I put it on and

8:27

listened, and literally it

8:29

was three people just

8:31

like a bit by bit, demolishing every

8:35

word, every single word, and

8:37

it was and I and and and

8:40

my flatmate was like, do you want me to turn this off? And

8:42

believe it? And it was just

8:45

so what one of my favorite bits for somebody

8:47

said does she think this is a book for adults?

8:50

I just remember it was like being It's

8:54

like being repeatedly kicked in the crotch?

8:56

Why did they tell you that? So?

8:59

Also, I'm that was what was so

9:01

interesting about it is I didn't think they knew

9:03

how much they don't hate it until

9:05

they read it, and by then it was too late,

9:07

and you know they were honest. And the thing is is that

9:09

it is quite it's quite an odd fish Monsters

9:12

because it's got a child two child protagonists,

9:15

but they're murderous and very

9:17

weird, and it's kind of it's

9:20

it is an adult book that feels like it's

9:22

written like a childldren's book, which

9:24

means that often I think people understandably

9:27

don't quite know where they are with it, and

9:29

then when it comes to some of the darker

9:31

stuff, are displeased. But

9:34

I think it's what I really liked about

9:36

it is I thought, we don't do you know what I'm

9:38

saying this. I don't read a lot of children's books these

9:41

days because once, yeah, you've already stolen,

9:45

and I didn't need anything else in their house. But

9:48

I thought it's a good book for kids, older

9:50

kids, because it feels like maybe like

9:53

rolled down, maybe like in a thing where there's

9:55

a real darkness that was

9:57

in those stories in the unfairy tales, real

9:59

fucking and your book. As

10:02

a spoiler is there's an element of sexual

10:04

abuse going on, but it's very yeah,

10:06

sort of hidden, and it's

10:09

sort of there if you're I just

10:11

think it's brilliant, but I think it can be you.

10:14

Yeah, it's it's interesting that stuff

10:16

because I don't ever mention

10:19

it. It's never mentioned, and

10:21

I think it is. It

10:23

is. It is tough, but it's also honest because

10:25

I wanted to write a book about what

10:27

I was like when I was twelve, and so the twelve year

10:29

old protagonist of this story is kind

10:31

of obsessed with murders and she reads this book

10:34

compulsively called the Murderers Who's Who? Which

10:36

is the book I have, which I think was my father's

10:38

when he was a child too. Were all of sex you

10:42

exactly pass it down and to your children.

10:46

And I just thought, why are there no books

10:48

or films or TV shows or anything where

10:51

the children in it, the girls in it, the teenage

10:53

girls, or the young girls in it are kind of as weird

10:56

as I was, because I was so deeply weird.

10:58

And I think we'll probably go on to about this in the podcast

11:00

because I think my choice is reasonably

11:04

revealing in that regard. But

11:06

like I just I feel

11:08

like I'm it's about fully a dirt.

11:10

This book about a girl who's never been noticed,

11:12

and the person who notices her is a boy who's a

11:15

psychopath basically, And I just

11:17

thought, if I'd met a sexy psychopath age

11:19

thirteen, I'd have done anything.

11:21

You know, this is the thing. It's like I was

11:23

not. I was so I think girls

11:25

are so vulnerable and so strange at

11:27

that age. And there's a reason that there's

11:30

a lot of I don't believe in it, but obviously,

11:32

you know, it's interesting that people talk about it poltergeist

11:35

activity around girls age

11:38

fourteen, and it's just the kind

11:40

of like vibrating like rage

11:42

and strangeness. And that's

11:45

just the stuff that I'm interested in. But obviously

11:47

what it does mean is occasionally somebody gives it to their

11:49

child and they're traumatized.

11:53

But that's good. Oh, come on, lads,

11:56

exactly good.

11:58

It's good to know. I very much

12:00

recommend it. Oh

12:03

God, what I

12:05

forgot to tell you? What I should

12:07

have told you when he came before we

12:09

started. I'm

12:13

so sorry. I don't know how to break this say. I

12:16

don't even know how you'll feel about. You might be all right with it,

12:18

giving yourself. Look, I'll

12:21

just tell you you've died. You

12:23

died. Oh my god, how

12:25

did you die? I mean it's

12:27

cancer, isn't it. I

12:31

mean, you know, got

12:34

a couple of moles that need checking. Bra he

12:37

didn't. I mean it probably is, isn't it. Statistically

12:40

with my you know, family history, I'm sure

12:42

that's what we'll be looking at. Okay, Oh,

12:46

bear in mind. You get to choose. Oh

12:48

I got to choose. Oh murdered.

12:53

Sorry, sorry, Acts

12:55

in the face, act in the climbs

12:57

through my window, acts through the face yeah,

13:01

really, yeah, it's I'm

13:03

one of the last people and

13:05

one. If the police had listened

13:07

to someone else, i'd have made it.

13:10

But they didn't listen to the last woman

13:12

who escaped from his car and he got

13:14

in through my window and he got me right in the face

13:16

with an AX. But because of your

13:18

deaf people, the laws have changed,

13:21

well hopefully because of my Yeah,

13:24

exactly, there'll be some kind of law called Emerald's

13:26

law. I'll

13:28

be revered, right yeah. Will

13:31

there be statues in your face with an exiit?

13:35

I would love that. In fact, I would

13:37

like that as my kind of tombstone.

13:41

In whatever however I die, Maybell

13:44

start a new sort of award for work riders

13:46

and it will be a statue of an ext It's head I

13:49

feel right now. Actually, okay, so

13:52

christ that's how do you feel about death? I mean,

13:54

you're obviously into it. Oh I'm terrified

13:56

of it, right. I think about it all the time. I

13:59

think I'm dying the time. I

14:01

have serious, like relentless hypochondria.

14:04

So if you know, I will like

14:06

and almost anything any twinch.

14:08

It's like here it is, finally She's

14:10

come for me. And so I think that's why I'm

14:13

always like prodding at it and poking

14:15

it because it frightens

14:17

me. So all the stuff that frightens me is the stuff that I want

14:19

to kind of look at all the time. But yeah, no, I don't

14:22

want to ever die ever, like

14:24

I really really like in Death

14:26

Becomes Her, if they gave me the elixir

14:29

of life, absolutely, I just never

14:31

want to die. How do you feel if everyone

14:33

else, no one else had taken the elixir

14:35

of life? So you're you're

14:37

not dying, but everyone you know is. Am

14:39

I still young? Because if I'm still young,

14:42

I can start again. I don't know what's the rule

14:44

on that. In Death Becomes Her, it's

14:46

quite tricky because you do stay young, but

14:49

if you die, your body kind of rots. So

14:51

if I could stay at the age I am,

14:53

now, I just let everyone else

14:55

dying. I just I

14:59

just made your friends. So

15:03

like you'd be a vampire? Yeah,

15:05

oh god, yeah, oh absolutely? Bang

15:07

into that have to stay at night?

15:10

Does that? Oh? I'd love it. I'm an insomnies.

15:12

That's fine. I'd have a cape. I'd have those glasses

15:14

he has in in Copper as Dracula,

15:17

those kind of blue tinted glasses. Lovely

15:20

Oh yeah,

15:22

what what a film?

15:24

A film? Why is it? If it's sort of forgotten?

15:26

I feel people don't talk about it now. Well, people talk

15:29

about it with regards to Keanu reeves

15:31

as performance, which I personally think is

15:33

sensational me too, but

15:35

in terms of like sheer like lavishness

15:38

and lushness and does

15:42

the ceiling, the writhing around the ceiling,

15:44

and also made possible

15:47

one of my favorite films of all time, Dracula

15:49

done loving it? Yes it did? Did

15:52

you ever see Dracula with Leslie

15:54

Nielsen? Big Time is Naked

15:57

gun meets Dracula. Oh my goodness,

15:59

me what a film? A forgotten

16:01

favorite? And also you can't

16:03

get it anywhere. You can't download it, you

16:05

can't. I mean I have tried to

16:07

find it. It's impossible

16:09

to find. Okay, So you're

16:11

scared of death, but you're right about death and

16:13

you're obsessed there and looking

16:15

into it and doing all this stuff you do hasn't made you any

16:17

less scared of it, of course, not

16:20

because it's the worst. How can

16:22

we go on? How can we go on

16:25

knowing that, knowing that it's I mean, I suppose

16:27

it's what makes life. So I mean,

16:30

this is what we have to think, isn't it that it makes

16:32

knife great knowing that it's finite. But

16:34

why do we have to die? Well?

16:37

Do we have to? Brett? That's not

16:39

what this That's what this podcast

16:41

is about. Why do we have to we have

16:43

to? Because phones don't I

16:45

think about this. This is mad, but I think about this all the

16:47

time. Car crashes, the

16:50

debris of a car crash. Everything's fine.

16:53

There's a banana in your bag which falls out

16:55

of your bag, and it's fine, it's unbruised.

16:58

And yet you you've gone so

17:01

the things that mean nothing, but the banana will

17:03

die, the banana will rout, and not a

17:05

banana. Then let's you mean plastic

17:07

bag? Bag? You

17:10

want to be a bag? I want to

17:12

be. You can't be breaking down, you're past

17:15

exactly. You can clog out the sea

17:17

forever and then and ever. Yeah, I don't mind. So

17:21

why did we die? But plastic bags

17:24

live to tell our story? Maybe

17:26

we're a bit down on plastic bags, and actually they're

17:28

going to be the torch bearers of our

17:30

whole civilization. Tell

17:33

us what you knew of them, plastic bags?

17:35

Well, of course from American Jesus.

17:41

I was thinking about that the other day and thinking

17:43

you couldn't in this cynical internet

17:46

world, you couldn't get away without scene

17:48

anymore, could you? It's amazing got away with it.

17:51

It was like a month they got before

17:54

everyone went on

17:59

it's a plastic bag, that's the rand. But now

18:01

and look at us, we've come from circle. Maybe he was right,

18:03

Yeah, maybe it is the only thing that will survive us.

18:05

All Yeah, that fucking plastic background. God

18:08

there go. Well, okay, that's

18:10

an answer. Well on the upside,

18:13

Yes, you've died by an ax in the face. Will

18:15

your poor husband lie next to you when this happened?

18:19

Did you wake up when he came in this X men? Actually

18:22

I think I was on my own and I

18:24

did wake up. Yeah. I was

18:26

wearing a sensational Maraboo

18:29

penoir dressing gown, so at

18:31

least when it when they walked in, it

18:33

looked like a glorious David

18:36

Lynch scene. I know that because that

18:38

Mario put Night

18:41

is on all the statues exactly.

18:43

You'll recognize it for your statues. The

18:45

good news is, although you died, there is

18:47

another lie. Do you think there was going to be

18:49

one? Really? Is that way? You're so

18:51

scared of it. There's nothing, is there?

18:54

You think it's Well, here's the way I think about it.

18:57

Do you remember before you were born? Yes,

19:01

that's ridiculous. When

19:04

I was on a podcast scolding

19:07

you, I

19:09

mean, because there's that brilliant Oh god,

19:11

I wish I knew it, because I'm going to balls

19:13

it up. But Nabokov

19:15

has a quote about life being incredible

19:17

because it's just a shaft of light or a crack of

19:20

light between two, just

19:22

two a colossal things

19:24

of darkness. And I don't see why the darkness

19:27

before being born has

19:29

any less meaning than the darkness after. I

19:31

mean, dying is the worst, isn't

19:33

it? Really? I wish because also

19:35

when I was younger, when we I guess probably

19:38

when we were younger, there were all those films and actually

19:40

teenagers in general, you see it with all

19:42

the like one direction fans. There

19:44

are all those films like A walk to remember

19:47

where I believe Mandy Moore has knee cancer

19:49

is the knee. I believe it's of

19:51

the knee. And

19:54

you know she's limping around and

19:57

she's and she's singing,

19:59

and you know there's a time when you're a

20:01

teenager before it all becomes you know, real,

20:04

what if you're lucky where

20:06

it sort of seems like glamorous

20:09

and I don't know, there's some kind of there's

20:11

sort of the emotion. You're feeling so emotional about everything

20:14

all the time, but you know, once you hit your thirties,

20:16

it's just sheer, blinding

20:19

terror. Yeah suddenly, nick cancer don't

20:21

see that glamorous, right,

20:24

Yeah, absolutely suddenly

20:26

nig cancers don't see that aspirational. No.

20:29

Okay, Well, so

20:31

there is enough to life. Good. So you were you

20:33

were wrong, and that's good news. It is great news because

20:35

if you're not gonna be a vampire, least you can hang out in heaven.

20:38

And in this heaven they love

20:41

films. Oh do you believe it? No,

20:43

I wouldn't. And

20:45

they want to talk to you. They want to they're big fans,

20:47

and they want to talk to you about your life. But only

20:50

three films, right, And the first

20:52

thing they ask you is, what is the

20:54

first film you remember seeing? Well,

20:56

this is a really difficult one because I

21:00

have like patchy memories of those sort

21:02

of like middle of the road Disney

21:04

movies that were maybe like not quite

21:07

the big hitters, The

21:09

Lion King, Aladdin, they were like The

21:12

Little Mermaid three and they didn't

21:14

have like the original voices exactly,

21:18

the like vhs

21:21

totally is

21:25

that really? Is that really one? It would

21:27

have been like those sorts of things, and I remember just like patchy

21:29

things of those but the things that

21:32

so quick

21:34

hang on. You need to make sure you edit that in so it's

21:36

correct, because the fans aren't

21:39

absolutely mental. You got those secrets.

21:47

The thing that I remember most watching with my sister

21:49

and talking about all the time and being obsessed with drop

21:52

Dead Fred with Rick Mail because

21:56

yeah, because I think that was the one where it was

21:58

the first like non can't tune

22:00

that I really remember watching,

22:03

Like probably every night my parents

22:05

and me and my sister did something called snack and video

22:08

every night, which now me and my

22:10

sister still do with our friends. What's your agetiveness

22:13

and your sister three years I'm

22:16

older. Yeah, it's just the two of the it's just the two of

22:18

us. So snack and video was

22:21

pretty much I'd

22:24

love it. It was very

22:26

dark. It was a euphemism

22:29

for something very traveling. No, it was just it

22:31

was watch a video and have a snack. But

22:34

it would usually be the same

22:36

video over and over again and dropped out Fred, like, what

22:38

a brilliant premise your imagine.

22:40

My friend is rick male, and

22:42

he's both sort of weirdly attractive if

22:44

you're a child, because you don't know where to put all those feelings

22:47

because he's thought of playing a child, but he's

22:49

a man. You know. It's

22:51

sort of that weird thing where you're like, I can see this

22:53

as a grown up, but he's talking and acting like

22:56

a child. So that's a kind of very interesting.

22:58

Did you find big sexs so sexy?

23:01

But the ginger friend?

23:03

Okay, I

23:05

was. I wasn't looking at

23:07

Tom Hanks in that way. The

23:10

ginger friend he grew up to be in terminaty two? What

23:12

Leddy Fairlong's mate, Hey,

23:16

oh my god, being like a punk anyway,

23:18

continued please anyway, So it dropped every I mean, you

23:20

know, it's just it was immensely quotable and

23:22

funny and joyful,

23:24

and it made me I

23:27

never had an imaginary friend, but I

23:29

pretended I had an imaginary imaginary

23:31

friend, you know, like I wanted

23:33

the attention of having an imaginary friend, but I couldn't

23:35

really commit. It's

23:38

called Joe. What

23:43

was the imaginary thing?

23:46

It was a rabbit kind

23:48

of it was. I can't even remember what it was called.

23:50

I mean, that's how little I committed to it. It was like

23:52

some rabbit, and occasionally

23:55

it was there, but most of the time I was like, secretly thinking,

23:57

I know this is bullshit. When

24:00

I was like mom, could yeah,

24:03

these idiots think I think

24:06

I have an imagin refriend. Yes, what

24:08

is it? Do you see

24:10

that rabbit? Oh?

24:12

No, I can't do Improperly panicked,

24:15

I was like, no, don't make me do

24:17

a bit because

24:21

I realized I cut you off as you were

24:23

about to do it and I was trying to bring it back. No,

24:26

no, don't. It's nothing I fear more than, as

24:29

you know, stand up or improvably absolute

24:31

hell. So dropped ed Fred. Yeah,

24:34

the best lovely

24:36

film. Great film, critically

24:39

not a popular film did

24:41

that when it came out it was what's be hated? But

24:44

I think that's by adults, like proper people

24:46

didn't like it. But I thought it made rittenmel

24:48

like huge in America. Or maybe that was

24:51

as a child. That was my perception. Yeah,

24:53

I think so it happened. I don't think

24:55

it was a I could well be wrong.

24:57

I mean, none of the films on my list have

25:00

had any I mean mostly for me, it's under

25:02

twenty percent on Rotten Tomatoes is my sweet

25:05

great middle above eighty

25:07

five, below twenty Those are my rules.

25:09

If you've got like sixty eight, just

25:12

do a waste my time. I agree. You know what

25:14

I say about Empire magazine, which I read

25:16

every month. If they give something three stars,

25:18

forget it. But I'll

25:20

go, yeah, exactly, it's

25:23

gonna be interesting. One I'll go to I'll go four,

25:25

and five, I go three. Give

25:27

it, miss, what's the point? And also Empire

25:30

generous, I think because they're a filmmakers magazine

25:32

and they love films and they appreciate how hard

25:34

it is to make stuff. So I

25:37

mean, it's my perceptional, but as a longtime

25:39

reader, and so

25:41

if they give it three, you know we're talking yeah,

25:44

two, we're talking sex lives of the potato

25:47

men. Okay, So that's the first

25:49

MOE week. And you've always out films, right,

25:51

No, of course, it

25:54

would be so strange to come on this and you've never

25:56

seen one Catron ran Cable and she's seen

25:58

about three Yeah,

26:00

but she is so funny that

26:02

she can you know, she could riff on three

26:05

films for the rest of her life. Yes,

26:07

that is true. So what about

26:10

what is the film that

26:12

scared you the most? Okay,

26:15

do you like a horrorize open? Let's

26:18

start from the beginning, The Dark Crystal. What

26:22

kind of monster would

26:25

make that film for children? If

26:27

you watch it again? I have, I

26:30

mean a lifelong fear of puppets

26:32

Now I cannot even look at it, Like if I see

26:34

one on the street. You know, sometimes you'll

26:36

go abroad or you'll be in trifolgusquere

26:39

autever it is, and someone will have a puppet, I

26:42

get a kind of I sort of go cold,

26:44

you know, when you go into like fight or flying. There's

26:48

something about them that deeply

26:50

chills me. And I think it comes from watching that

26:53

and because what The Dark Crystal

26:55

had and what kids now don't have is

26:58

the sense that it was real. And it's the same

27:00

with Labyrinth and all those Jim Henson movies.

27:03

Is that now you have CGI, and there's something about

27:05

the weightlessness of the CGI where you're like, you

27:08

know, it's not real, but you knew

27:10

those fuckers in the little

27:13

scary skelettal things and capes.

27:15

I mean I wanted to watch it again before this

27:17

podcast, remind myself and actually couldn't bear it, like

27:20

I just couldn't even go so

27:23

frightening, And then the second one

27:26

as a kind of partner to that, because

27:29

you'll never as scared as your owner of a kid.

27:31

So return to Oz. I'm

27:34

so glas. I was finally fucking

27:36

someone right, finally for Verisa

27:38

Bulk before the craft, thank you in a

27:41

very early and great role. I

27:43

mean, the premise of this children's film, Dorothy

27:46

has been given electric shock therapy

27:49

because Auntie em thinks she's

27:51

lost her marbles. The electric

27:54

shock therapy sends her into a kind of fugue

27:56

state where she goes back to Oz, where

27:58

these lads with wheels

28:00

attached to their hands and feet

28:03

are terrorizing the whole

28:06

place, and it's run by a woman who

28:08

has interchangeable heads. It

28:11

was the Yellow Road. Is It's best

28:13

to be It's crumbling, it's

28:16

so scary, so scary.

28:18

But again, imagine

28:21

someone trying to make that film now, like, imagine

28:23

how great that film

28:26

would be now. But you just I think

28:28

partly because again CG, I mean, I don't

28:30

want to be like, of course

28:32

we all love Avatar, I hate CGI

28:36

is I hate it, but it does make

28:38

everything much less frightening because

28:41

you know it's not I'm talking. Look,

28:44

come on, let's do this, let's do it. Puppets

28:47

are there. Oh my god, they're there. They're

28:49

there. CGI, it's not there. We know

28:51

it's not there. Don't matter how good you think your CDI is,

28:54

it's not there. We're watching a computer game. When am I watching

28:56

a computing game? We're plan to the cinema. I know the actor

28:58

is not acting against something. Put some in front

29:00

of If you put fucking cloth in front of them with an eyeball

29:02

on it, I know they're there with the

29:04

thing. Something's happening, it's real, they're touching

29:07

it. I'd rather watch a cloth with an eyeball

29:09

on it than a computer game. Thank you good

29:11

night. I mean genuinely,

29:14

that sounds quite scary. Yeah, but I

29:16

agree with you. We've all seen a ball on a stick.

29:18

We all know what it looks like, because we've

29:20

all seen a green screen. We've all seen the kind of you

29:23

know, bobble up fits. I just it just

29:25

does nothing for me. It does not make

29:27

me feel anything at all. But

29:29

those early films that

29:32

I grew up with have the

29:34

power to kind of put me back right

29:37

back into kind of child fear in

29:39

a way that anything I've seen since. I mean, I think

29:40

the most recent thing that scared the shit out

29:43

of me, you know, I guess I would have

29:45

been seventeen or eighteen,

29:47

because I'm still at school was The Ring Not

29:49

RINGU, the original version, which I found

29:52

less frightening, the Niami Watts version,

29:55

which frightened

29:57

me so much that I slept in my friend Molly's

29:59

bed, not like that because

30:02

we were obviously boarding school, imagine,

30:06

and I had to sleep in her bed at the end of her bed

30:08

every night for six months because every time

30:10

I looked at my computer, I just thought, she's coming for

30:12

me, that little fucker. It's

30:15

going to clamber out of that screen. Good

30:17

Filmlverbinski, Parents

30:20

of the Caribean. And also, lest

30:22

we forget a film that you and I saw together in America,

30:25

The Cure for Wellness. Very

30:28

odd experience, very odd, strange,

30:31

a game of two halves that film, I would say, the

30:34

first half absolutely terrific, the second half

30:37

what's going on? What's happened? But I

30:39

like any film that you go, let's see the ending

30:42

like that absolutely, And I think we all are

30:44

the net gain was pretty high

30:47

in terms of enjoyment, like

30:49

it, what's your most favorite film? Do you talk? What's

30:51

your most what's the film that scared you most?

30:56

This is the thing about podcast I find super strange.

30:59

Number One, I'm very aware

31:01

of the spish in my mouth swollowing

31:04

because I know there's a microphone here and I'm I'm

31:07

realizing I'm quite a like spishy

31:09

person now. I mean, I'm not picking that up. But we can

31:11

always cut out your if you

31:13

can, just if you can just

31:16

cut out those creepy

31:18

noises to review this on good

31:20

reads. Very spy, very

31:23

wet mouth. That's

31:26

on my spotlight page. Actually it's one of my

31:30

But there's that element podcast, and

31:32

the second element is it's like it

31:35

is necessarily you're not allowed

31:37

to ask back, but I really

31:39

want to know about you. Yeah,

31:42

I tell you films. I just haven't named

31:44

the ultimates. But Return

31:46

to Us would is it

31:48

would be up there. It's so dark and

31:51

it's really good. It's really

31:53

good and proper du but I do

31:55

think it toughened us up. I mean that

31:57

God, that's such a like that arge

32:00

Brexity thing today is we're like, well,

32:02

return to us, gave us the balls we have

32:04

to do. But no, you're there's

32:06

something very cosseted about children's

32:08

films now and in fact all films, And

32:11

there's sort of things that we grew up with in the issues

32:13

of nineties that something like serious sort

32:16

of stuff in that way. I think that's what like

32:18

something that Texas Chainsaw Massacre, the

32:20

original one, which I find very upsetting

32:22

and I do not enjoy in any way. Something that's interesting

32:24

about it is it looks

32:27

there's something so unsafe

32:29

about the film itself. It almost looks like

32:32

a home video. Like yes, it's really it's

32:34

like a snuff film. It's film.

32:36

You do not feel safe. You do not feel

32:38

like this has been crafted by technicians.

32:41

It's sort of dirty and like, oh

32:43

god, I've watching this like like evil,

32:45

this work of evil that's sort of and

32:47

I guess that's brilliant. Maybe,

32:49

yes, you're right, it's not. It

32:51

doesn't feel it's not engineered.

32:54

It feels really, you know, it feels really real.

32:56

And actually I can't even think of a

32:58

recent horror film that's that. I suppose the Blair

33:00

Witch Project was a similar thing, and all the kind

33:03

of fat wreck there's I found, but

33:05

maybe that was what

33:07

started with it. But you know, it's unbelievably

33:10

traumatizing and the fact

33:12

that it was based on you know, I mean that Australia

33:15

in general, I think has such a great, rich

33:18

horror sort of film

33:20

background because like, what a weird expand

33:22

that expect even of

33:24

course the BBC just did it. Oh god, all

33:26

the girls getting lost, picnic

33:29

hanging wrong. It's just the

33:31

space is so chilling,

33:34

that sense of even in between Us two a terrific

33:36

film that I saw twice in the

33:38

cinema. You know, even they knew

33:40

that getting stuck in Australia is no joke

33:44

and that is where they love to stop quite

33:47

and it was an important lesson when

33:51

yeah, it gets weird on it's a

33:53

lovely, lovely moment. So

33:56

I've read an entire book about Jim Hedson

33:58

and the and I mean we've lots of some assessed

34:00

with in Henson and the Creature Workshop.

34:03

But and it's sort of it. It seems obvious,

34:05

but it's like, oh yeah, that they learned from the darkness.

34:08

Dark Crystal was his big baby.

34:10

He'd been making them up its fears, and he wanted to make this

34:12

thing that was entirely made of puppets

34:14

and all the things that scare you, and it

34:16

wasn't that successful Dark Crystal, and he

34:19

sort of had this realization that the reason Duckness

34:21

didn't take off in the way he had hoped is because

34:23

there was no human in it, which is why Labyrinth

34:25

became next. And Labyrinth is all puppets, but

34:27

it has Jennifer Conny and it has David Bay And

34:29

he said it was because you needed

34:33

we as an audience sort of need an avatar. We need

34:35

a person we connect to and then we go into this crazy

34:37

world. So the problem

34:39

with the Dark Crystal was there was no

34:43

endpoint. It was this whole world which was amazing

34:45

and fantastical and feat of imagination,

34:47

but there was no entry point.

34:49

It's like when I pitched stuff that has women in it

34:52

and everyone says you need a man otherwise no

34:54

one or as

34:58

well. But they were like women doing something that. I

35:00

mean, it seems I have a fucking clue. It's

35:03

just too jarring. We need

35:05

an entry. Get

35:08

Bowian for Christ's sakes, and get

35:10

Jarreth the Goblin King. What was going on?

35:13

What I mean, those leggings

35:16

all day, all day is

35:20

sake, it's the doorbell

35:22

again. Why do you leave

35:24

the door jar? This is also

35:27

maybe this is I don't think closing the blinds

35:29

is going to help you think this is doorbell?

35:33

Maybe this is where we die? Is

35:35

recorded on the podcast anyway,

35:40

that's yeah.

35:42

So David Bowie slash Bowie

35:44

doing with puppets. If

35:46

I told you this that I went to screening at

35:49

the Prince Charle Cinema of Labyrinth

35:51

with the original technicians

35:54

or some of the people who liked some of the puppeteers,

35:56

some of the people who'd done the special effects on it, and

35:59

they did like a afterwards. It was like the thirtieth

36:01

anniversary. Perhaps it was one of the most charming

36:03

things I ever went to because none of them

36:05

could remember anything. They

36:08

couldn't remember anything. They were really sweet and

36:10

funny and they like sort of friends who

36:13

hadn't seen each other for a long time. And there was video

36:15

footage of like behind the scenes, and one of

36:17

them was like, that's you and he was like is it? Oh?

36:19

Oh did I do that? Like they didn't, They had

36:21

nothing. Why that is because

36:23

they're not looking because they

36:26

just moved on with it. I think because I guess

36:28

they made the thing. They weren't thinking, oh

36:30

this is fascinating, and it was just

36:32

their job. But also, you're ducked behind furniture

36:34

a lot of the time. You're

36:36

not in the room. You're in the room, you're not in the room. I know that

36:38

sounds mad, but if you're an actor, you'll

36:40

look at you're still in the scene. Was if

36:42

you're a pupper teer, they're just looking. You're just

36:45

screens. Yeah, looking at screens or screens.

36:47

Yeah. I guess. So. I don't really know how Papa

36:49

taps were. That's so sweet

36:53

it. I mean, it literally wasted out. I mean lovely.

36:55

I loved it. But there was not an anecdote,

36:58

not an anecdote amongst them except one

37:00

of them, who was clearly a drinker. He said

37:04

he said his only bit of that gossip. He meant

37:06

David Bowie or as we called him, David

37:08

ten Take Bowie, and they were

37:10

went, oh no, no, no, he was lovely

37:13

new lines. I would see

37:15

that. That is when I would have stood up and left.

37:18

I do not disrespect the

37:20

goblin king. Ever didn't

37:22

those lines. Of course he didn't,

37:24

because he's got life on Mars in his head. He's

37:26

got five years, he's got a whole world

37:28

of the universe. And he said, you can't learn

37:31

lye from children's film. Come

37:33

mate. Also he sold it, He

37:35

sold it so hard love it. What

37:38

is the film that made you cry the most. It's

37:40

a difficult one because I cry in

37:42

almost every film, but I

37:45

never really cry in real life. Some

37:47

one of those weirdos who just I just

37:49

hold it all in, hold it in,

37:51

hold it in. Until I watched like an

37:53

ad for Thrush, and I'm like the

37:57

thing I think that I remember most of

37:59

like of like vocally

38:01

sobbing Armageddon lived Tyler's

38:04

hand on the monitor as

38:06

her father was gonna sacrifice

38:09

himself so that ben Affleck could come home.

38:12

That to me was the most emotional

38:14

thing. And also we had don't

38:17

want to miss a thing in the background. You

38:20

really thought they'd make it, that

38:22

drilling team on

38:24

that meteorite. You thought it was going to be okay.

38:27

So I sobbed. I listened to

38:29

I had the CD of the soundtrack that

38:32

I listened to all the time. I must have been

38:34

like twelve or thirteen, and just wept,

38:36

like listening to it, just remembering it, and

38:39

just wept and wept awak because that's exactly

38:41

what I wanted to happen to me at that age. I

38:43

wanted my dad

38:45

to die. No more specifically,

38:48

I wanted my dad to sacrifice himself

38:51

for my beautiful boyfriend Ben Affleck

38:54

in some kind of spectacular space

38:57

well saving scenario. Is

39:00

it really appealed to my narcissism

39:03

and romanticism at the time. And

39:05

also I suppose at that stage I would have been a girls'

39:08

school and it must have been one of

39:10

the first times where I was like, oh

39:13

wow, Ben Affleck. But weirdly

39:16

who I really fancied in that film? And

39:18

I don't want to sell my sister down the river too,

39:20

But stevee shemy

39:23

me and my sister he

39:25

is He's our number one. That's

39:27

good, Billy Madison putting on the lipstick.

39:30

I have that my sister made me a handbag

39:32

with that scene on it for a Christmas

39:35

present. But for some reason, Steve b shemy

39:37

as an astronaut, a wise cracking astronaut.

39:40

That's it for me. That is my number

39:42

one. How do you feel as Steve as

39:44

a humorous pedifile. I

39:50

haven't seen Cornair for long enough, but

39:52

I'd probably I'd probably be able to get there

39:55

given the right sex. You don't have a suitcase

39:57

with that one. I can't.

40:00

I can't remember the film enough. I'm worried now that

40:02

it's really dark and I'm going to watch

40:04

it and feel really horrible. So that made me cry.

40:07

Most recently the film made me cry and made

40:09

me cry for like hours afterwards

40:11

was Melancholia, the

40:14

las onon Trier film with Kirsten

40:16

danced, which I

40:18

mean, I

40:20

don't know what. I don't know what you thought about this film,

40:22

but like, I really love las onon Trier

40:25

right, and I

40:27

know he's there are some problematic

40:29

aspects to his filmmaking, but

40:31

I love his stuff and

40:34

the combination of it being about kind of

40:36

depression and

40:38

sort of nihilism and then the

40:40

actual world ending, the

40:43

idea of the world ending, and how visceral,

40:46

how unbelievably deftly that's

40:48

done. When you're told at the beginning

40:51

the world is going to end. Of this film, they

40:54

show you it happening. And yet

40:56

there's a moment where what's his name

40:59

twenty four keep us Sutherland. He makes

41:01

a little stick with a little thing around.

41:03

He's a physicist. I can't remember the ins and outs of the

41:05

stops. I's crying too large. But there's a moment

41:07

where you think it's going to be okay and that the planet's

41:10

actually moving away from Earth, and

41:13

then it doesn't, and then it just starts hurtling

41:15

towards Earth. And I just thought

41:18

it was the first time i'd really thought, of course,

41:22

everything will go eventually,

41:25

so Shakespeare, so you know, even

41:27

if you can get to scripts with your own

41:29

death, the idea of like everything going

41:32

was so harrowing, and I suppose I'd never

41:34

really thought about it. Also, it had Wagner's

41:38

libas stopped as the music

41:40

in the end of it, which is also used in Bass Lemons

41:42

Romy and Juliet during the poisoning,

41:45

which is again Wagner not

41:47

a good guy. But that piece of music

41:50

is you know how it came

41:52

from him? I don't know, but it it is moving,

41:55

but it just got you know, it just gets

41:57

you, and then you just can't stop. You've

41:59

just open the floodgates. Do you cry in front

42:01

of people if you're watching it with your husband? UK?

42:04

Oh, yeah, in front of him. I mean he's saying

42:06

it all it's too late, it's too late to

42:08

hide anything from that guy. I

42:11

don't like crying in front of people like

42:13

I won't. I remember you

42:15

were saying on your podcast. I can't remember what you were saying you were

42:17

crying about. But you wait, you had to hide behind

42:19

a jumper as you were leaving

42:22

banks. Oh my god. Oh

42:25

well that, I mean that really got me too, anything

42:27

with dads, anything with parents.

42:29

But I remember going to see it. It's not film but

42:32

constellations by Nick Pain that play

42:35

and again something sometimes it just gets you.

42:37

And I had to stay until

42:39

everyone had left because I'd really let myself

42:41

DOWNE was really I'd kind

42:44

of lost all sense of what

42:46

was real. But

42:49

yeah, and I think the one that makes

42:51

me cry, the moment it starts as

42:53

a kind of Pablovian response, is

42:55

it's a wonderful life, Okay, because

42:58

and I know lots of people think I know the

43:00

arguments against it. I know it's cheesy, but

43:03

there's something about the goodness

43:06

and the message of that film, of of

43:09

being that kind of decency will be

43:11

rewarded, which I feel kind

43:14

of less and less in this. I know

43:16

that's I mean, you know, I know that it's

43:18

true, but it's kind of the most important thing

43:20

that holds us all together. And

43:22

I just think it's so And the first one

43:25

of the first bits that happens that makes me cry

43:27

almost the most is is

43:30

there's I can't remember how well. I don't know how well

43:32

you remember this film, but there's a bit where the

43:34

young James Stewart when he's a kid,

43:37

works for the pharmacist and the pharmacist

43:39

accidentally puts poison

43:42

in someone's medicine because

43:44

he's just got a telegram that his son has died in

43:47

the war. And there's a whole thing and something

43:49

happens and Jimmy Stewart basically takes the wrap

43:51

for the poison because he knows it will be

43:53

the end of his But

43:56

it's again it's about a little boy no recognizing

43:59

an older person grief

44:01

and that they're not able to express

44:05

it. And the pharmacist hits him

44:07

and he takes it, and it means he's death

44:09

deaf in one ear for the rest of his life. And there's just something

44:11

so it's like, you know, goodbye,

44:14

mister Chips, Missus Miniver. All of those

44:16

films about like good men,

44:18

I mean, there are no films like good women are because we're not really

44:21

interested, but I

44:24

mean we need Also the great thing about that

44:26

film is when he's died or when he's never

44:28

existed in the world where he never existed

44:30

in potter Land or potter Pottersville.

44:33

The worst thing that's happened is wife

44:36

is that she has become a librarian. She's

44:39

a spinster librarian, and she wears glasses

44:41

and he looks at her and he grabs her and he says, no,

44:44

no, not you do. Everyone else has gone to

44:46

shit. Everyone else is a prostitute.

44:49

Everyone's fallen on hard times. And as a Plaine

44:51

librarian, I

44:54

mean, but yeah, sob sob first

44:56

constant sobs. Yeah,

44:59

it's people being nice, isn't it. It's always

45:01

good. But like

45:03

in real life, you can scream

45:05

in someone's face, but if somebody says you're okay,

45:08

that's it. I mean, it just takes

45:10

a stranger. The

45:13

name is a robber. That gets me and why that

45:16

story is right at the beginning,

45:18

comes out of prison, it's been in prison, comes

45:20

out of prison. A priest stays

45:22

at the priestss. He nicks some candles

45:24

because he needs money. He gets caught. He's

45:26

about to go back to prison, and the priest says, I

45:28

know I gave them to him. Oh

45:32

god, that's sort of

45:34

thing just don't even

45:36

talk about. And he says, remember this, Jesus

45:40

God, oh God, No,

45:42

I mean anything like that, anything like

45:44

that. It's just too much, any

45:46

excuse to have a cry. I think that's a I

45:49

mean, it's got to be a British thing, doesn't it. I

45:51

mean, not necessary. Well, I think

45:53

it changed. I think it used to be a British then. But everyone

45:58

said let's cry everywhere I X factor.

46:00

Of course, let's we forget the

46:03

two opened Flying with the moment Flying with that wings

46:05

came out. That is when people

46:08

started something. That's

46:10

the graph. That was the end of what

46:16

is a film that you

46:19

used to love? And then what's recently an

46:21

oh dear, Okay, I'm

46:24

sure everyone has said this. Has

46:26

everyone said pretty woman? No,

46:28

pretty woman has come up in different context. Yeah,

46:31

I mean, here's the thing about pretty women that

46:34

there is no defending it. Really now is there feminine?

46:41

Okay sort

46:43

of things? There's hidden feminism within that film.

46:46

I think that Look,

46:49

she's I would definitely take her word for

46:51

over mine. I think that it's

46:54

just that what it did

46:56

for so many girls

46:58

me included was would sort of sell

47:01

an idea of your

47:03

kind of work you're worth like

47:06

in physical currency, and

47:08

that that was a good thing. And I believe

47:11

that still, you know, I still

47:13

kind of buy into The

47:16

reason I think I feel so uneasy

47:18

about Pretty Woman is I like there's a secret

47:20

part of me that's like, yeah, just pay

47:23

me. You know, there's a kind

47:25

of awful there's an awful thing that I

47:27

think all all girls have

47:29

been, like, I don't know, sort of slightly conditioned

47:31

to think it's like, oh, wouldn't it be easy? Wouldn't

47:34

it be easy if the stuff that you're

47:36

really valued for was the

47:38

thing that you were just given money to do anyway,

47:41

and you could go into shops and you could tell them to fuck

47:43

off. And so it kind of

47:46

it's that I know that I'm a venal, greedy,

47:49

grasping, dirty goblin

47:53

that I can't watch that film because it just it

47:55

just makes it sells me a life

47:57

that doesn't exist, and

48:00

also glamorizes obviously, you

48:03

know, I think that I feel very really

48:05

look, it's a can of worms that I won't get into because

48:07

I don't know enough about it, but I do think

48:10

in general it is it's

48:12

inarguable that it's glamorizing an industry

48:15

that in general is incredibly

48:17

bad for both women and men. And

48:20

I mean this is this is a comedy

48:22

podcast, right, this is

48:24

whatever whatever Happened. And similarly,

48:27

another film which is and this is really interesting

48:29

actually is I don't want to get

48:31

this wrong, but The forty year Old Virgin, which is

48:33

a film I absolutely

48:35

love. It has a scene

48:37

in it where the advice

48:40

in a nightclub to get ladies, and

48:43

it shows kind of how far we've come. Really. The

48:45

advice is wait at a nightclub and

48:47

wait for the girl. I'm paraphrasing. I don't

48:50

want to get this wrong, but basically wait to pick

48:52

up the drunkest woman. Yes, And

48:54

it's a kind of funny bit, is the thing

48:56

of it. And it's so interesting because

48:58

you know, this what probably fifteen

49:01

years old. And again, the film itself

49:03

is really funny and really heartwarming and actually I think,

49:05

very kind in lots of ways.

49:07

But it just is one of those films where it shows

49:11

how different are attitudes to like consent

49:13

and the way

49:16

that I don't know, women should maybe

49:19

be treated. It's just it's

49:21

just suck it jars so strongly

49:23

sorry recently that did you notice that?

49:26

Do you even remember it? I mean, that's of an impact

49:28

I made at the time, and I'm sure everyone involved

49:30

in it would probably now go, you know,

49:32

like I mean, look at Porky's, look at National

49:34

Amon. Any sex comedy is always

49:37

going to be problematic, and it's going to reflect its

49:39

times, of course, but

49:41

it is interesting. It is

49:44

it's it's because it's the fact

49:46

that I've completely forgotten that scene. And

49:49

obviously at the time, I just thought, yeah, this

49:51

is what I'm fascinated by, is that we see that

49:53

scene now and I find it genuinely shocking,

49:56

and yet however long ago it was

49:58

Yeah, I obviously went funny,

50:01

true funny because it's true, very

50:04

weird. But the what

50:06

I do like, like Seth Rogan. I saw an interview with

50:09

Seth when he's promoting

50:11

Neighbors to Bad Neighbors too, which

50:14

I liked, and he was saying, you

50:16

know, we've learned stuff, and we've grown

50:18

and we've changed, and there are things in our past films

50:20

that we would definitely never

50:22

do now, absolutely, and that's far you know,

50:25

of course, And I think everything

50:28

no, and every single person has

50:31

the right to like learn

50:33

and change. And I think particularly making

50:35

any sort of making anything, really,

50:39

especially if it's funny, you're going

50:41

to fuck up occasionally and you're going to kind of step

50:43

over a line, and I think people should

50:45

really kind of be reasonably forgiving

50:47

off that stuff. Otherwise, like you

50:49

know, it just becomes too complicated. What

50:52

is a film the alternative to that

50:55

that most people don't like? It's sort of

50:57

critically with our but you're like BURKEU, I

50:59

love it. If we're going by rotten

51:01

tomatoes and by reputation.

51:05

The film that I love most

51:07

that people wouldn't agree with is

51:09

Deep Bluesy The Shark Rennie,

51:12

I love that, Okay, Deep Lucy.

51:14

Do you remember the premise of Deep Lucy? Because

51:17

go on please, I do, but I'd like

51:19

to hear you. Okay, pitch me Deep

51:21

Please. Deep Bluesy nineteen ninety

51:24

nine, l cal J Say

51:27

No More. It is set in an underground,

51:30

underwater compound. It's a team of

51:32

scientists and they are solving

51:35

Alzheimer's I

51:37

Forgot by genetically engineering Mako

51:39

sharks, the most violent shark as

51:42

we all know from our Dawling Kindersley Shark

51:44

books. So

51:46

they've genetically engineered them to take

51:48

chemicals from their brain in order to

51:50

sort of Alzheimer's. Now, of

51:53

course, the very unfortunate

51:56

side effects these sharks no

51:58

too much and

52:02

they are. They become sentient and

52:05

genuinely Almost

52:07

the last film I will think

52:09

of before I die will be Deep

52:11

Lucy. I think about it at

52:14

least once a week. There's a scene

52:16

in it where ellll cooldre. I

52:18

mean the things that happen in the scene,

52:20

he's the chef, right, I

52:23

believe. I think he's the I think he's the chefer.

52:25

If he's not, He's in a kitchen. The

52:28

kitchen is filling with water because the shark has

52:30

worked out how to kind of break

52:32

through the windows. So Ell cool

52:34

j and his pet parrot, don't forget

52:38

his pet parrot are

52:40

in the kitchen. It's filling it with water. The shark

52:43

is coming in. He climbs into

52:45

the oven. The shark before

52:47

he gets into the oven, the shark gets his parrot. Sorry

52:49

to say spoiler alert. He climbs into

52:51

the oven, and the shark is wise enough to know to

52:54

turn the ovener. The shark

52:56

knows what an oven is. Oh

52:59

my god, how does it know? Well?

53:01

We will never will never say, but

53:04

honestly starts

53:06

heating up cool Jay. So

53:08

cool Jay is cooking. He's

53:11

cooking in a kitchen with

53:13

a shark in it. That's filling up the water. If

53:15

that is not the best

53:17

idea that anyone has ever had,

53:20

I literally don't know. I don't know what's better

53:22

than that, Like, there are no films better than

53:24

that. Nothing else has it for you.

53:26

And you make a very good argue it, why

53:29

would you watch anything? Why would you watch like apocalypse?

53:31

Now watch

53:34

a shot demolish a parrot and

53:37

then cook and cojare he gets O. Course

53:39

he does, because he's smart, but

53:41

also when but it does have genuinely one

53:43

of the best surprise deaths big

53:46

time. Midway through an inspiring speech,

53:49

Yes, surprise death, the surprise death

53:52

in that is, during

53:54

an inspiring speech about the fact that they

53:56

are not going to be what, They're not going

53:58

to be beaten by these arks. Halfway

54:01

through who is it? Samuel

54:04

L. Jackson, I haven't seen it for

54:06

so I can't believe. I think about it so vividly and yet

54:08

I haven't seen it. Phages, Yeah, and Samuel Jackson, just

54:10

the shark just comes and snatches

54:12

him away halfway through the film, like

54:15

Psycho, you just you just gone. I've started

54:17

talking about this is stand up back. Just realized. You

54:19

think the premise of Deep Blue c is mad?

54:21

Like? Why are they messing around with sharks trying to

54:24

cure out simmers? They gave ecstasy

54:26

to an octopus the other day

54:28

in real life? Did it have a nice

54:31

time? Ye made it more social?

54:35

A perfect thing? Oh? I love

54:37

octopuses, Yes,

54:40

I think so, I think hope remember

54:42

that from Qi Octopusses.

54:45

But again, you can't have calamari

54:47

because they can. They're so clever. Yeah,

54:50

they're really clever. They can. If you put them in

54:52

a jar, they learn how to on twist

54:54

the jar. Could they turn on another? I

54:57

mean, Bratt, I think we both.

55:00

They're just a step away. They're one. They're one

55:02

drop of MDM A actually probably

55:04

coke. It would be coke that would give them the idea,

55:06

wouldn't it. Okay,

55:10

we should pitch this to the sci Fi channel. Calamari,

55:13

No More Calamite. A bunch

55:16

of like vegans protest

55:18

eating calamite, but then the calamites eats

55:20

the picks them off.

55:23

Yeah, it's been binding octopuses have been binding

55:25

the hanger. I think Calamari is squid. Actually

55:28

we better just do a little Google. Don't think it will

55:30

matter. I mean, I

55:32

think that people watching this aren't going to care. The

55:35

octopuses are gonna right

55:37

in eight leggage how

55:39

many? Anyway, the point is okay,

55:42

anyway, deeply see the second thing

55:44

I would quickly say, and again

55:46

it wasn't reviled, but I don't think it's got

55:49

as much a claim as it deserved.

55:51

Vacation twenty fifteen with

55:54

their towns in Christina applegates

55:57

it's a it's a it's

55:59

the thing people haven't so it's a kind of national

56:01

lampoon Grizzwold spin off.

56:04

No one saw it. It is the film I recommend

56:07

to the most people, and

56:09

I have not yet not had

56:11

a text message or all afterward saying this is the funniest

56:14

film I've ever site. Really, it is exactly

56:16

like the comedies we grew up used to be. It's joke

56:18

after joke after joke, and some of them are really silly

56:21

and a bit terrible, but generally

56:23

most of them are sensational. It's

56:26

just it's just got everything. So

56:28

that's just that's just a serious recommending.

56:32

What is it's

56:34

my favorite? What's the film that means the

56:37

most to you, the most of

56:39

you, not necessarily because of the film, but because

56:41

of the circumstances around which

56:43

you saw it that will always make you remember

56:45

it. First date, for example, Well, first

56:47

date I went on with my parents. So yeah,

56:50

that's fine, isn't it. Go on a date

56:52

with the boy you're taking you on a date. But make sure your

56:54

parents come, for God's sake, Well

56:56

make sure they come on you're the day with you.

56:59

I just invite to them. Else, how are we?

57:03

It's yeah. Last year, well

57:06

it was Cruel Intentions. So when do Cruel Intentions

57:08

come out? Yeah? Oh that's

57:10

fun. Do do

57:13

do? Go to an as k and

57:16

order Apollo Chicken bake

57:19

okay, and then sit between your

57:22

mom and the boy that

57:24

you fancy and watch the film Cruel

57:26

Intentions, which has the line you can put

57:28

it anywhere in it, which of course I didn't

57:30

understand. I

57:33

was like, but where is there to put it? Leaning

57:46

across the boy? I

57:52

mean, you know, so that was the

57:55

parents? Oh yeah, yeah, we went the whole No,

57:59

no, no, of course not. I mean I was absolutely

58:02

I was cold with embarrassment, you know,

58:04

And I don't think they meant it. I think I think

58:06

what had happened to was because he was a family friend

58:09

and we were quite young. We probably were only twelve.

58:11

Maybe I think they

58:13

probably just thought it was a cinema trep. But in

58:15

my mind it was a date. And

58:19

so I think, I think I don't

58:21

know what. I do not know what compelled

58:24

them to be honest with you.

58:30

Oh, we've been really wanted torture. It's like Buffy, the

58:32

vampires come Ryan,

58:34

Ryan Phillippe slash Philippe.

58:37

He has the same trouble I have with his last

58:39

name, where it is how

58:42

he pronounces it is way more pretentious

58:44

than how it's spelled. So I'm for now allegedly,

58:47

I mean, you know, according to my

58:49

family, but it's always Fennal. But everyone

58:52

thinks it's very high since the bouquet ish,

58:54

yeah, I think, I say, yeah,

58:56

I mean, I don't recare. So

59:00

that so that was the first date situation. But the film

59:02

I remember most is Drassic Park. Okay,

59:05

because it was my seventh

59:07

birthday. I was in America for some reason,

59:10

I'm on holiday.

59:11

I was

59:15

in America or holiday

59:18

and I

59:23

beg to go and see it, and again, I don't

59:25

think that. I don't think anyone

59:27

was really you know, it was the nineties. Everyone was very negligent

59:29

with their children. It was very much like, ah, yeah,

59:31

you know, it's probably fine. So I was

59:33

allowed to go and see Drassic Park for

59:35

my seventh birthday, and I just I

59:38

was just completely

59:40

overwhelmed by her brinant it was on

59:42

your own, no, no, no. I

59:44

think I would have been with my mom or maybe like maybe

59:47

a pair or I can't quite

59:49

remember who I was with, because I was

59:51

so excited and

59:54

I watched it and I remember thinking every stage

59:56

like it was probably the first time I thought, really,

59:59

I've got to have something to do with this, right, because

1:00:02

this is just like I couldn't believe people

1:00:04

could imagine such a thing. The

1:00:06

idea was so brilliant and it was so frightening

1:00:08

and and so and I got one

1:00:11

of those big American butchery popcorns,

1:00:14

and I'd eaten so much of it, and I was so excited and overwhelmed

1:00:16

that when the velociraptors came into the kitchen, I vomited

1:00:19

on myself with excitement. And

1:00:21

then I would not let whoever

1:00:24

was with me take me out, because I couldn't bear to miss

1:00:26

any of it. So I just sat in my own vomit until

1:00:29

the rest of the film. And I

1:00:32

just was I mean, I was just so obsessed. I

1:00:34

had a veloci raup stuffed velociraptor.

1:00:36

I mean, what imagine a seven year old

1:00:38

child girl, child

1:00:41

like wandering around with a huge stuffed

1:00:43

velocirap I mean, it was it was madness. I loved

1:00:46

it, and it's just oh, it was just so great, the whole

1:00:48

experience and the smell of the butshery popcorn

1:00:50

and being in America and

1:00:52

the sick But that was kind of a

1:00:55

matter of pride because I was like, yeah,

1:00:57

yeah, I'm sick. You weren't that on the

1:01:00

I was sick. I was sick, and in a

1:01:02

good way. Unlike the good Reads person,

1:01:04

I was in a good way. Okay,

1:01:07

So what is the

1:01:10

film that you

1:01:13

thought was the sexiest? So

1:01:16

is this sexy really sexy? Or is

1:01:18

this weird sexy? Well

1:01:21

there's two, there's two. I will

1:01:23

start with the sexiest film all time first,

1:01:25

I should there. I find most films sexy, Okay,

1:01:28

I find crying on films and it's

1:01:30

a lot of there's moisture. There's

1:01:32

a lot of moisture going around when I was it's

1:01:35

it's there's something about the I don't know, I just

1:01:37

love I just love films basically. But

1:01:40

the sexiest film in the world as Secretary

1:01:43

with Maggie Chillenhall and James Vader,

1:01:47

and it's the first time again,

1:01:50

I guess I saw a sexy film that was sex.

1:01:52

There was an erotic, a deliberately

1:01:55

erotic film because I suppose in the eighties there

1:01:57

was all that kind of body heat and the Postman always rings

1:01:59

twice. But I guess I would have been

1:02:02

a teenager when that film came out, and

1:02:04

it was really unfashionable to have those kind

1:02:07

of sexy films when we

1:02:09

were teenagers. I can't

1:02:11

think. I mean, there was cool intentions, that was pretty soft.

1:02:13

Yeah, that's really you know, it's

1:02:15

soft enough to watch with your parents. But

1:02:21

but yeah, but sex. She was like, Oh, somebody's

1:02:23

made a sexy film about something that is

1:02:25

kind of, you know, maybe

1:02:28

off the beaten track in terms of what and it's

1:02:30

and it's coming from. It's completely

1:02:33

the engine of it is quite damaged.

1:02:35

Young woman, What is I've

1:02:37

got to ask it again. I'm really sorry, I'm dunison

1:02:39

a podcast. We'll have to cut it. But someone has mentioned

1:02:42

Sexay. I'm fascinated by Sexuary. I haven't

1:02:44

seen it since it came out, but I remember think it's very good when

1:02:46

I saw it. But so

1:02:49

many women I know it's their sexiest

1:02:51

film. Yeah, And what I would like, if

1:02:53

you can articulate it, is why you think

1:02:55

that might be that this is the one,

1:02:58

like what is it about Secretary that works so well?

1:03:02

Well? I think it's exactly the same thing. It

1:03:04

comes from the same route as the pretty woman thing,

1:03:06

which is that the relief of

1:03:09

being objectified, of

1:03:11

actually just being an object because I

1:03:13

think if you're you know, because if you grow

1:03:15

up with lovely parents and you know,

1:03:17

and you you go to a reasonably

1:03:20

nice school, and you know you've got if you've had a kind

1:03:22

of if you're a girl and you've had a lucky

1:03:25

life, you are told

1:03:27

and you have to and it's quite right

1:03:30

to fight against this ship as much as

1:03:32

possible to be more even

1:03:34

though you spend all your time, you

1:03:36

know, you know, we talk about all the time being

1:03:39

objectified. Every day of your life,

1:03:41

from the moment you turn ten

1:03:43

or level. Let's say the

1:03:46

relief. And that's what

1:03:48

the film is about. It is about a girl who is

1:03:50

a self harmer. She cuts herself and

1:03:53

part of that is that is to try and

1:03:55

control something she can't be controlled, and so

1:03:57

therefore the relief for her, for

1:04:00

somebody to just say,

1:04:03

there's a scene. The sexiest scene in that film for

1:04:05

me is when she calls him up and he tells her what

1:04:07

she can eat and he says, sort

1:04:09

of three peas and one,

1:04:12

you know, come what it is, and she just eats them with her

1:04:14

fingers and you just think the

1:04:16

awful you know I mean. And

1:04:19

also I can't speak for the other women who

1:04:21

found this film

1:04:24

no, no no, no, no, but from

1:04:26

what I can gather from myself and probably

1:04:29

from you know, my girlfriends who talk about stuff

1:04:31

all the time, is is the more you are, the

1:04:35

more you feel

1:04:38

like you've managed

1:04:40

somehow to be a functional

1:04:42

woman in the world, have a job, do all

1:04:44

the stuff that you know, we're supposed to pass

1:04:46

your exams, go to university, you know, whatever it is,

1:04:48

however however it is you define

1:04:50

like being a successful, functioning human,

1:04:53

The truth of it is the relief of

1:04:56

just being the thing that the world wants

1:04:58

you to be, which is kind of on your and

1:05:01

that's I think why it spoke

1:05:03

to so many girls at that particular time, because

1:05:06

we've always been told don't

1:05:08

like this stuff, and so it's so

1:05:10

illicit and it's so complicated,

1:05:12

like all sex stuff. It's it's really

1:05:15

really complicated, and there's and it's not easy

1:05:17

to put your finger in

1:05:20

or but like there

1:05:23

was something like, oh, no,

1:05:26

is complicated and it is messy. And actually I haven't

1:05:28

seen it for years, and I wonder if I saw it now,

1:05:31

I would feel I

1:05:34

would feel differently about it. But I think there was

1:05:36

so much about it. I think Maggie Gillanhaugh is just sublime

1:05:40

and her performance is so moving

1:05:44

actually, and I think James Spader was such

1:05:46

a good choice because he's not a sexy

1:05:48

man. You know, he's not, of course to women in the

1:05:50

eighties from like his early career, he's

1:05:53

but you know, to like those of us who

1:05:55

didn't know him as a young man, he was just some kind of boring

1:05:59

boss who was you know, it's not exactly

1:06:01

Leonard Jacapri in his prime, but it was

1:06:03

the fact that he was not

1:06:06

obviously sexy that made it such

1:06:08

a surprising thing. I mean, I don't

1:06:10

I really don't know. I

1:06:12

really don't know what it is, and I think, but

1:06:15

it was. I just loved it and

1:06:17

I saw it in the cinema and I was just completely blown

1:06:19

away. I remember my mum and dad's

1:06:21

friends. I don't know why

1:06:24

I know this, but they saw a section and it sort of

1:06:26

saved their marriage. And a

1:06:28

month afterwards they just did role play of sex.

1:06:30

Really really,

1:06:33

it was very much. It's saved there, the

1:06:36

marriage. I mean, it's a romantic comedy. That's

1:06:38

the thing about Secretary. It's it's a really beautifully

1:06:41

made romantic comedy.

1:06:43

But the thing is, but here's the interesting here, I suppose,

1:06:46

is that he loves her in the end and

1:06:49

he marries her in the end. And actually it's

1:06:51

a bit fifty Shades of Grades and it's like a complicated

1:06:54

version of that Oh fifty saighth great

1:06:56

another of my favorites. I love. Oh.

1:07:00

Sure, we've spoken about us. But the moment

1:07:02

in the first film when

1:07:04

he takes her up on the roof and

1:07:06

a helicopter comes down and

1:07:08

she says, where are we going? And

1:07:10

he looks at and he says, Seattle

1:07:16

oh seeaattle,

1:07:18

stop it the

1:07:21

steak. And

1:07:24

also there's I mean my favorite

1:07:26

bit about those I mean the books about all of it, and

1:07:29

I should say I'm not above I love it. I love

1:07:32

the books, I love the films, but the thing that

1:07:34

I love is them explaining why

1:07:36

Christian Greer is rich age twenty seven,

1:07:38

a billionaire, and it's very much along the lines

1:07:40

of so Christian computers.

1:07:43

And he says, yes, and that's it.

1:07:48

I mean, the research that's gone into why

1:07:50

he's rich is I mean cursory.

1:07:53

So you know the film Crank. Have you ever seen

1:07:56

Crank? No crank

1:07:58

too high voltage? Yes? Oh

1:08:01

boy, what Frank? What's

1:08:04

the premise. The premise is he's

1:08:06

been given an injection which if his

1:08:08

heart drops below beats

1:08:13

per minute or die, so we have to keep doing adrenaline

1:08:15

things. But the whole explanation

1:08:17

of it, he goes, he calls

1:08:19

someone, goes, I've been fucking I've

1:08:22

been done in with some stuff, and

1:08:24

they go, what is it? What could have done that thing?

1:08:26

And he goes, some Chinese ship. That's

1:08:29

it. That's the whole Oh, that's it,

1:08:31

exactly explain it to Chinese

1:08:34

ship. And now he's it's

1:08:37

but I love that. Just cut out the middle man. None

1:08:39

of us really care, do we? He could have said some

1:08:41

science work, what's the point?

1:08:44

More like a limitless What does the Book of Limitless?

1:08:46

How does that? And

1:08:48

explains it? So? Yeah,

1:08:51

so secretary also for me, and

1:08:55

one of the main things for me was the bronzes.

1:08:58

The bronzes, the bronze Emily,

1:09:01

Charlotte, Gillian exactly,

1:09:08

Wuthering Heights and Janeare nothing.

1:09:10

Nothing comes close to how sexy

1:09:12

those books are. They nothing ever will

1:09:15

the fact that those women in that cold, rainy

1:09:17

house at that time wrote the

1:09:19

sexiest books ever written and ever

1:09:21

will be written, probably, and so the

1:09:24

Michael Fassbender Janeare is

1:09:26

pretty close to and again almost

1:09:29

no sex, I think, I think, actually maybe even

1:09:31

no sex at all. But it's just

1:09:33

heavy. The whole film is heavy with like,

1:09:37

you know, just longing, longing.

1:09:39

I think longing is always better than the Actually I didn't really

1:09:41

want to see people go at it.

1:09:45

Yeah. Well, also just because I've done

1:09:47

sex scenes as I know you have

1:09:49

to, and I just know they're brutal and

1:09:51

miserable, and no they're not miserable,

1:09:53

They're just like something you have to do and

1:09:56

get out of the way, and they're mortifying and everyone's

1:09:58

embarrassed, and so whenever I

1:10:00

see them, I think, oh god,

1:10:03

poor you. It sort of takes it away for

1:10:05

me. If I'm seeing like fake penetration,

1:10:07

I'm like, oh boy, your Paul lamb. I

1:10:10

hope this isn't after lunch and you've just had a curry.

1:10:14

But what is very good

1:10:17

is any longing looks? Yeah,

1:10:19

yeah, I mean any I mean period dramas. I'm

1:10:22

just a I'm just a posh British

1:10:24

girl, you know, I

1:10:26

am a sort of I used to say

1:10:29

I don't like period stuff because

1:10:31

I thought, I don't watch a lot of what I thought,

1:10:34

But then of course, you know westerns

1:10:37

are a period drama, or don't

1:10:39

maybe watch a Western. I'd literally rather But you

1:10:41

know what, the one is that I love. Wings

1:10:43

are the dev Oh, I

1:10:46

absolutely love. Well, that's a kind of men,

1:10:49

kind of dark MENA has

1:10:52

also one of the best very sexy

1:10:55

sex scenes that is about

1:10:57

something at the end of Wings of the Dam

1:10:59

because I had a bottom Karsher, isn't it? And

1:11:02

praest from Priests and

1:11:04

they they've done

1:11:06

this thing. They were in love and

1:11:08

they've done this thing to get money.

1:11:11

But the thing that they've done has hurt

1:11:13

them, has hurt their souls

1:11:16

essentially, and at the end, after they've

1:11:18

completed their task, but it hurts

1:11:20

their cells, they have sex and it's meant to

1:11:22

be like, you know, a

1:11:25

celebration sex. For what the sex is

1:11:27

is, Oh, we can't love each other

1:11:29

anymore, we're not in love and it all and

1:11:31

you're like, oh, yes, please, miserable

1:11:34

hate sex. Oh

1:11:38

their souls of it's

1:11:40

a great film. Well, because

1:11:42

we know the rules. We know

1:11:45

the rules of Victorian England, because we all grew up

1:11:47

on it. There are no rules now anyone can have sex with anyone.

1:11:50

I mean well still at sorry

1:11:52

to my husband. I just mean no.

1:11:56

I just mean that, like, yes, you can hurt

1:11:58

someone's feelings. Yes

1:12:01

you can betray someone, you can fuck

1:12:03

someone. The rules of engagement of love are

1:12:05

still the same. But what is not the same

1:12:07

is if you fuck someone, your

1:12:10

life is. If you're a woman and you fuck someone, yah,

1:12:12

you are over. You're This is the tension

1:12:15

of something like Tessa, the Durberville's, all

1:12:17

of those films. It introduces

1:12:20

an element of an

1:12:23

obstacle which makes the seduction

1:12:26

so much more high

1:12:28

stakes. High stakes, Yeah, high stakes

1:12:31

and long lasting.

1:12:33

And you know, because now you know, I don't

1:12:35

know what you've heard about these kids

1:12:37

today, but you can have sex with someone practically

1:12:39

the moment you meet them. And I'm

1:12:42

that's all for the good and fair play to everyone.

1:12:45

Good on you, But it doesn't

1:12:47

make for very erotic storytelling.

1:12:50

Yeah, because there's no you

1:12:53

know, there's no journey. There's no journey,

1:12:55

there's no like you know, the slight

1:12:58

hand touch, the slight you know, just

1:13:00

those things. And I think I don't know if

1:13:02

men feel that. I mean, I don't want to generalize about

1:13:04

men, but you're the only man in

1:13:06

this room, the

1:13:09

entry point. You can be the entry points we

1:13:11

book can access this conversation. Do

1:13:14

you like do you watch those sorts

1:13:17

of things like glove being taken

1:13:19

off? And or are you like get

1:13:21

let's get no, no, no,

1:13:23

no. The The one of

1:13:25

my favorite films is The Virgin Suicides and

1:13:29

those virgins killing themselves. They're

1:13:33

longing and there's a sequence where he

1:13:35

where he goes it's Dunn card fos in

1:13:38

there, the whole build up

1:13:40

of their I love that, I

1:13:42

get it everything

1:13:45

it works, but

1:13:48

also I'm just thinking, I can't believe

1:13:50

I hadn't thought about the sexiest, the two sexiest films

1:13:52

I've ever seen with this year, and it's God's Own Country,

1:13:56

which is ye, earth

1:13:58

shatteringly moving and sexy

1:14:00

and genuinely as close to

1:14:03

a bronze Roman service scene,

1:14:05

so great, so romantic,

1:14:07

so sexy and call me by

1:14:09

your name. I mean, if

1:14:12

ever there was a film about longing and

1:14:14

waiting and oh, just you

1:14:17

can feel the oh, I can go

1:14:19

on. I mean, I actually can't. I just I'm not

1:14:21

going to talk about this because I will literally wang

1:14:23

on about those films forever

1:14:25

and ever and ever. I mean so many. I mean, basically,

1:14:28

my answer is, Brett, every film,

1:14:30

every film I've ever seen, I could every

1:14:33

film where there's at least a gap between the meeting

1:14:35

and yeah,

1:14:38

we're the minimum of a tiny gap. If

1:14:40

at least there's a hello, how are before they have sexy

1:14:43

sex? I'm on it. So on

1:14:45

the subject of the sad sub question, which

1:14:47

is worrying, Okay,

1:14:50

Brett, I did some research this morning because

1:14:52

I knew what it was, and I didn't know what film

1:14:54

it was cool, So

1:14:57

I looked it up and I've written it down. So

1:15:00

it was what I knew was and what I typed

1:15:02

in to Google to tell me what

1:15:04

it is was care Bear

1:15:07

baddie boy. Okay,

1:15:09

so it is from

1:15:12

care Bears, the care Bears movie to a

1:15:15

new generation. You've seen it, right, Yes,

1:15:18

The baddie in that is called dark

1:15:20

Heart, and

1:15:22

dark Heart is a sort of satanic

1:15:25

figure who wants to murder all of the care

1:15:27

Bears and he can. He's

1:15:29

in lots of I will. Why don't

1:15:32

I just read you his character description here?

1:15:35

Dark Heart, his most assumed

1:15:38

form is that of a young, ginger haired human

1:15:40

boy cloud and red. His true

1:15:42

form is that of a dark cloud with

1:15:44

ominous red eyes. Now, when

1:15:47

I tell you that both forms really

1:15:51

absolutely did it for me. I

1:15:55

know, do you know what

1:15:58

there was? There's something about

1:16:01

clouds, there's

1:16:03

something about a nebulous black cloud glowing

1:16:05

red eyes. Just yets

1:16:08

me going, no, it was again, it's the same

1:16:10

thing. It's exactly the same thing, which

1:16:12

is I'm given something and I know what

1:16:14

I'm supposed to think, which is dark Heart is

1:16:16

bad. But what my brain is telling me

1:16:18

is dark Heart is so fit

1:16:21

and what he's doing is he's coming into

1:16:23

the care Bear kingdom, and

1:16:26

he's telling them all stuff

1:16:28

that they don't but they're not allowed to do. He's trying to

1:16:30

make them all do stuff they're not supposed to do. And

1:16:33

I mean, I must have been. I

1:16:36

can't. I mean, I can barely remember this, but it's

1:16:38

so vivid in my I can't have been. I must have been six

1:16:41

seven eight and it wasn't

1:16:43

like a sexy things. I must have been

1:16:45

far too young for that. But I definitely was like,

1:16:47

oh my god, that's

1:16:50

who I'm after, right, dark

1:16:52

Heart, the cloud with glowing eyes. That

1:16:56

that is my vibe having met your

1:16:58

husband. If I made yes, you may some

1:17:01

context he is, Well, he is exactly.

1:17:03

He's got glowing red eyes. You've

1:17:06

not really nailed your brief. He

1:17:09

looks like he

1:17:13

floats two inches above the ground.

1:17:16

He goes, yeah,

1:17:18

well look, but you know, so

1:17:22

it was dark Heart in his human and frog form.

1:17:24

Can we say also dark Heart crucially in

1:17:26

the end, like in Secretary, there is a happy

1:17:28

ending. So I couldn't. I can't toy

1:17:31

with danger. But I'm a nice girl, you know I don't.

1:17:33

Actually you're going to marry it. I

1:17:35

can't marry a big cloud

1:17:38

with eyes. It's too difficult to

1:17:40

get a plane seat. I don't know

1:17:42

how the sex would work. I mean, it's

1:17:44

too difficult, but yeah, I mean I

1:17:47

fancied Lucifer and Paradise Lost.

1:17:50

You read it, of course, I've read it. May come

1:17:53

on a little university

1:17:55

called Oxford that

1:17:59

day when it was pretty much day

1:18:01

one, but mostly I was thinking, oh, that's Satan

1:18:06

to town on me because

1:18:09

he knows he's bad. And I'm like, it's and

1:18:11

Satan sort of like he's fallen. And

1:18:13

I was like, I think I could fix it.

1:18:18

Yes, maybe hasn't

1:18:20

matter. I

1:18:23

love that. Maybe

1:18:25

you could fix Satan. I do

1:18:28

my honest best. Brett, great

1:18:31

answer, that is not turned up. What

1:18:34

is the film that

1:18:36

you most related to? Okay,

1:18:40

this is hard, and I think

1:18:42

actually I've noticed that girls on your podcast

1:18:45

have maybe a harder job than men do, because

1:18:50

like that, Okay, well you know,

1:18:52

but most people generally speaking. When

1:18:54

I thought of this, I thought, oh, that's interesting because

1:18:56

there aren't that many female characters that

1:18:59

I really think, Yeah, I get it. So

1:19:01

for me, two films starring

1:19:03

Alissi Silvestone, and it's

1:19:05

an obvious choice. Number one,

1:19:08

Clueless, Number two, Killing of a Sacred

1:19:10

deer. I mean they're the I

1:19:12

mean it's a classic combo, isn't it. Because

1:19:15

Clueless was everything I love. It's

1:19:18

like funny and joyful and

1:19:20

wry and clothes the terrific.

1:19:23

And I was so in love with the Lizziy Silvestone

1:19:25

that I wrote her a letter about her dog, which

1:19:27

she never responded to. Really dog

1:19:35

fucking but I've

1:19:37

killed dog if you don't come and be

1:19:39

my friend. No, I was just like I'd read

1:19:41

in Miss Magazine about her dog's name,

1:19:43

and so I wrote a really polite, well researched

1:19:46

letter about her dog, thanks

1:19:48

for nothing. I can't remember. But

1:19:50

then I also used to write weird letters to Miss

1:19:52

Magazine, pretending I had I mean,

1:19:54

this is just this is something I could hadn't

1:19:56

even remembered, pretending I had weird like things

1:19:59

like I and stop eating paper. I don't

1:20:01

know what it was made

1:20:04

up, very odd anyway, there

1:20:06

was a lot going on so Clueless.

1:20:09

But the thing that I saw, the thing that I've seen where

1:20:11

I thought, that's about as close to something

1:20:13

that I that's about as close

1:20:16

to how I feel my brain feels, is

1:20:18

the killing of a sacred deer, which

1:20:22

is, you

1:20:24

know, it's really interesting because loads of people hate

1:20:26

it and I cannot believe

1:20:28

it because it is it's a Greek It is a Greek

1:20:30

tragedy set

1:20:32

in a kind of modern non town in America.

1:20:35

And it is about a man, Colin

1:20:37

Farrell, I mean, anything with Colin Farrell, and it Frankly

1:20:39

and Nicole Kidman, a man who

1:20:42

has kind of taken up with this odd boy

1:20:44

who is a sort of satan.

1:20:47

It is a sort of Satanic figure and who's coming in

1:20:49

and making making Colin

1:20:51

Farrell, who is a doctor's children

1:20:53

ill. And it is the

1:20:56

darkest and the funniest film

1:20:58

I have ever seen. And the denouement, I

1:21:01

mean, it's quite a new film, so I don't want to do any

1:21:03

spoilers, but the denouement turn

1:21:06

off now if you haven't heard it,

1:21:09

the denouemal is Colin Farrell, puts a bag

1:21:11

on his head, gets out a shotgun,

1:21:13

ties his family to some chairs, and then, because

1:21:16

he has to kill because it's sort of a Greek tragedy,

1:21:18

has to kill one of them. He just

1:21:20

plays like a kind of Russian blind man's

1:21:22

buff And it's

1:21:26

just extraordinary and

1:21:29

it's so funny, and it's so

1:21:31

terrible, and it's one of

1:21:33

those films where I can't really explain. It's

1:21:35

the first thing in ages that I've watched

1:21:37

two nights in a row because I just could not couldn't

1:21:41

believe it. And sometimes sometimes

1:21:45

you get that feeling with books more frequently than

1:21:47

films, where you feel like you and the writer. I don't

1:21:49

know, maybe the act of reading is different where you're like, I

1:21:51

am so, I am

1:21:53

so with you. And I felt that watching Dog

1:21:56

Tooth that my husband watched it before

1:21:58

me and said, you've got to watch this. This film

1:22:00

is as close to your brain as I can think of a film,

1:22:03

and I felt that even more with you. Do you

1:22:05

mean that just the whole kind of vibe

1:22:08

of the film, the whole vibe

1:22:11

is your set of world view. Yeah, well not my world

1:22:13

view, but like the feel of it, the the

1:22:16

scale and the like, because

1:22:18

it felt a bit like Melancholia in the sense it

1:22:21

was global and epic but also

1:22:23

kind of a domestic drama, and it felt and the

1:22:25

way it was made was stilted and frightening,

1:22:27

and it just

1:22:30

I don't I don't really know how to describe it.

1:22:32

It just I just watched it and thought, yes,

1:22:35

oh, totally. Whatever

1:22:37

that response is, I don't know. I mean it's

1:22:39

it's weird because I don't really watch films, and I

1:22:41

don't. I never really feel like, ah, that is so

1:22:44

mean, not because I'm very interesting,

1:22:46

just because I don't know what I would feel

1:22:48

like. I think you've answered

1:22:50

it perfectly, though. Thank you. You're the killing

1:22:52

of a sacred dip. Thank you?

1:22:55

Do you like me? Do you like people shooting their kids

1:22:58

with a bag of your head?

1:23:00

Circles talking weird? Oh, there's

1:23:02

a sex scene in that that is deeply,

1:23:05

deeply chilling, very

1:23:08

traveling. Love It

1:23:10

perfect, a perfect film. It's proper

1:23:13

great. It's proper great. I went to see it

1:23:15

at midnight on my own shepherd's bush.

1:23:17

That's that's a crowd and it's just me a

1:23:20

couple at the back sort of getting off of each

1:23:22

other for it. And when it finished, the

1:23:26

guy went he might know,

1:23:28

Yeah, anyway, what did you figured that? I'm

1:23:32

gonna have to think about it anyway. Fucking

1:23:34

weird? Will it? I

1:23:36

couldn't argue with him. The thing is

1:23:40

you're either going to get it or you're not. And I don't mean that

1:23:42

in a snobbish way. I just mean like that.

1:23:45

There are tons of things that I don't intrinsically

1:23:47

get as well that I can recognize the

1:23:49

good, I just don't get them. But the killing

1:23:51

the Sacred Deer, I can completely

1:23:54

see why people didn't like it, because if you

1:23:56

don't find it funny, you're absolutely

1:23:58

not gonna like it. It's a kind of it's a matter

1:24:00

of taste. But for me, and I think

1:24:02

lots of people who are parents, I'm not parents, so I

1:24:04

didn't mind that that stuff so much.

1:24:07

You're less free, Absolutely,

1:24:10

I think the it's

1:24:12

not it isn't like a Deviline film at all, but in

1:24:14

the way that some people don't lynch. You either like

1:24:16

are locked into this sort of trance

1:24:19

that it sets or you're not. Absolutely,

1:24:22

it's like being hypnotized. And I love that

1:24:24

feeling and that, I mean you and I have talked about

1:24:26

that new twin Peaks before,

1:24:29

But the sense of dread, I think dread

1:24:31

is something I'm like very interested. When I did get hypnotized

1:24:33

to get over my fear of flying, one

1:24:36

of the things I'm haunted with in my self

1:24:38

conscious is dread. Really, I mean,

1:24:40

you know, they sound mad, dread

1:24:43

didn't really want to leave, but fear of flying?

1:24:45

Did fear of flying was? It's fine now I recommend

1:24:48

it, but dread as

1:24:50

a kind of concept, and that's and that is

1:24:52

what Lynch does, and it's what Patricia Higsman

1:24:54

does as well. I think that all those things have like and

1:24:58

and killing the sacred It is just you the

1:25:00

whole time. It's like a nightmare. You know

1:25:02

what's happening, but you can't explain it. Great

1:25:05

answer, You're welcome, really

1:25:07

good answer. Objectively.

1:25:09

What's the greatest film of all time? Shining? Okay,

1:25:13

I mean you know that's it, isn't it. There's no more,

1:25:15

that's it. It's perfect. Uh yeah,

1:25:19

yeah, I mean it's difficult

1:25:21

that one. Magnolia fucking

1:25:24

all right, Magnolia, Tom

1:25:26

Cruise and Magnolia. The greatest performance

1:25:29

of all time, the greatest casting,

1:25:31

the greatest performance. I mean, I mean

1:25:33

that I would say those two for me. But

1:25:36

and again just people

1:25:38

didn't a bit like I think the Killing Sack

1:25:40

for a a Deer will absolutely be the kind

1:25:43

of third in that sort of trilogy of films people didn't

1:25:45

really know what to do with, because when The Shining came out,

1:25:47

people thought Jack Nicholson's performance was terrible

1:25:49

they thought it was terrible, Like it's

1:25:52

one of the best performances in any

1:25:54

film ever. I watched Magnelia. I've

1:25:57

been flying the weed and airlines shout out

1:26:02

much better than you think they would be. And

1:26:04

they have an amazing film selection. And

1:26:06

weirdly they have well because I think they

1:26:08

were last in line when the movie

1:26:11

they had that to life. So they have like what they call

1:26:13

classic movies, and it's really odd stuff like Thumberlina

1:26:16

and Oh, and they've

1:26:18

got really really like low down stuff. But

1:26:21

they also have Magnetia, the one film where you go, well,

1:26:23

no, that's a classic. They have Magnelia. I watched

1:26:25

it twice. Okay, that's in one

1:26:27

flight because I was watching it going,

1:26:29

I can't believe how good it is

1:26:31

and Forge and I'd seen it when it came. I've seen

1:26:33

it a few times and I just couldn't

1:26:36

believe it. And they're bits. You forget that weird opening

1:26:38

and the singing along to Amy Mann,

1:26:41

which he said that you know, everyone

1:26:43

at the time kind of Understandabing was like, this

1:26:46

is a this is mad, this terrible

1:26:48

idea, and he was like, look, I think what he said

1:26:50

was we can cut it out if it doesn't work.

1:26:52

We can cut it out. You know, such

1:26:54

a good idea, and it just of course it works

1:26:57

because you're always with him, because he's just like, yeah,

1:27:00

I know you're in. Whatever he's

1:27:02

made, you know you're in. It's the same with Krubrick.

1:27:05

I never know how to say his name. Kubricked,

1:27:10

wrecked, you

1:27:13

know you're fine. Hitchcock, you know you're fine.

1:27:15

I mean, that's another one. Stranger's on a train, the

1:27:18

opening of that the Shoes, you know

1:27:21

exactly who you're dealing with. I discovered

1:27:23

because I won't see it again at the cinema. Stop

1:27:25

going now, you're really putting

1:27:28

me off. Magneta now, but I

1:27:30

read reviews. They've got views. It's

1:27:32

stupid. At the end of it's like,

1:27:35

well, I mean, god, let

1:27:37

me just say the most obvious thing that any person has

1:27:39

ever said. But if it's really really

1:27:42

good, people won't like it first time round.

1:27:44

They just won't like my stand up.

1:27:48

It's like my face. If

1:27:51

I can get him to come to his second gigh.

1:27:53

Okay, Okay, this guy,

1:27:56

this guy,

1:27:59

these are so fan they're not frightening. Okay,

1:28:02

So you're saying I'm saying, I'm

1:28:04

saying Shining Magnolias, Strangers

1:28:06

on a Train. Right, I'm gonna let you have no idea.

1:28:10

What's the one film that

1:28:12

you can or have? What's the most

1:28:14

over and over and over again? Hot Fuzz? Really,

1:28:17

it's on it, It's on

1:28:19

IB two, and every time it's on

1:28:21

wherever it started, I'll go, oh, watch

1:28:23

a bit of Hot Fuzz. And I always watch it

1:28:25

to the end because I

1:28:27

love it. And when I first saw it,

1:28:30

I was at university and I saw it with my

1:28:33

now husband and two

1:28:35

close friends and

1:28:38

it was just one of those kind of golden days.

1:28:40

It was like three in the afternoon and we're at university's

1:28:42

where Buckled do, and we

1:28:44

went to watch Hot Fuzz and it was just joyous

1:28:46

and it was pats in them on. Everyone loved

1:28:48

it, and we'd love Short

1:28:50

of the Dead, and I just say every time, and

1:28:53

and I think the film itself is terrific,

1:28:56

but it also reminds me of that like lovely

1:28:59

Day, and so whenever I watch it, I'm like, oh,

1:29:01

I should call my friends. I don't

1:29:03

think I'm too big for them. Now, friends,

1:29:07

what's the worst film? Okay,

1:29:10

how have you seen a film called the

1:29:12

Number twenty three? Starring Jim

1:29:14

Carrey. Now let me let

1:29:18

me who's the girl in it? Is it got? I

1:29:20

mean the redhead from Picky Fences in it? I

1:29:23

don't know what Pick of Fences is. Oh

1:29:26

gosh, I don't believe. So okay,

1:29:29

go on number twenty three, the number twenty

1:29:31

three. The premise is this, Yes,

1:29:34

it's a it's a numerology thriller. Yeah.

1:29:37

Almost all of the dialogue is this.

1:29:40

There were seven women in that room, and that room

1:29:42

had three windows. Seven plus three minus

1:29:45

ten equals twenty three. I mean basically,

1:29:47

this is all the dialogue. Okay. Now,

1:29:50

the premise is Jim Carey is painting house

1:29:52

for some reason. He goes to a bookshop. He

1:29:54

finds a book called the Number twenty

1:29:56

three, written by a man called Top

1:29:59

Secrets No.

1:30:02

Two ps y k

1:30:04

r E DOUBLET Top

1:30:07

Secrets. And as

1:30:09

it transpires, Jim

1:30:11

Carrey himself is Top Secrets.

1:30:14

I Top Secrets,

1:30:19

Yes, and he has written this book

1:30:22

in a sort of memento style way it.

1:30:25

I could not recommend this film more highly.

1:30:28

I again, I watched it in a

1:30:31

in a like a ton of us watched it,

1:30:33

I don't know a few years ago, like it must

1:30:35

I don't know. It must have been on or something, and it

1:30:37

was one of the most pleasurable. It's

1:30:40

just a romp. I love Jim Carrey,

1:30:43

even when Jim Carrey is like Topsycrets.

1:30:46

Absolutely, I'm

1:30:49

down with it. Hang

1:30:51

on. I wrote it down because I wanted to make

1:30:53

sure I got the spelling right. All it is topsy

1:30:56

two ps y crets.

1:30:58

KR is my bread but

1:31:00

with a K Topsy Crets.

1:31:05

And I mean I think I reference

1:31:08

Topsy Crets once or twice

1:31:10

a week. I can see where

1:31:12

you please watch it? You've sold it?

1:31:14

Can we do a DVD extra

1:31:16

of us watching the number twenty three? Even

1:31:20

though well spoiled the twist

1:31:22

it's I'm deeply sorry

1:31:25

to anyone who's been waiting for

1:31:27

it to come out of HS. But when

1:31:30

you see Topsy Crets written down, I've

1:31:32

forgotten that he made this film. It's such

1:31:35

a weird anomaly

1:31:37

in his CV. I suppose it must

1:31:39

have felt like a twelve Monkey's or a Memento

1:31:42

or well wasn't it? Also, what's the other numbers film?

1:31:44

Knowing I don't know that Nicholas

1:31:46

case where it's like, well seven

1:31:49

seconds in advance? Is it that now? It's the one

1:31:51

where it's like he's an I

1:31:53

think Rose Burns in it, and they work out numbers like twenty

1:31:56

twenty three minutes till the end of the world. Yes,

1:31:59

great, I love for any of that stuff because

1:32:01

all of that stuff makes me laugh because

1:32:04

it's so I mean, sorry to anyone who believes

1:32:06

in it, but it's really loadbib balls,

1:32:08

isn't it. Sorry Numerologists

1:32:14

podcast, Now Toxiccrets is gonna

1:32:16

be yours nearly

1:32:20

at the end. What's the film that made me laugh

1:32:22

the most? Well,

1:32:25

Dracula Dead. Other than through

1:32:28

Dracula Done Lumming, it's pretty close. Now.

1:32:31

The Scary Movie franchise mate

1:32:35

absolutely terrific,

1:32:39

and I can watch one and two

1:32:41

in particular, over

1:32:43

and over and over and over again. Anna

1:32:46

Faris would have got an oscar for

1:32:48

Scary Movie. Yes, thank

1:32:50

you, she should have. I

1:32:52

mean everything about it

1:32:54

is perfection. It works

1:32:57

both as a piece of satire and as

1:32:59

a film in its own right. The second one

1:33:02

is mostly pastishing the house

1:33:04

I'm Haunted Hill, which I would argue, sorry

1:33:06

Catherine C. S. Jones, as you remember, was

1:33:09

maybe not a big enough film for

1:33:11

everyone to get the references.

1:33:14

The second one is grayser is and it's got more

1:33:16

gross out stuff in It's got to

1:33:18

buy a spoon ca with a sort of

1:33:20

strange withered hand which

1:33:23

he No, No, it's not to buy a spoon cake.

1:33:25

It's it's that. It's

1:33:27

the Yeah, what's cabin

1:33:29

boy? It's

1:33:31

the guy is the guy? Yes, and he's doing I

1:33:34

mean, look, scary.

1:33:36

Movie makes me laugh every

1:33:38

time. Again, it probably does not stand

1:33:41

up to scrutiny. Oh shut,

1:33:46

I've not a long time, but I remember I'm

1:33:49

a big fan of the Way.

1:33:52

Have you seen fifty Shades of Black? Yes,

1:33:55

fifty Shades of Black? Almost My favorite joke

1:33:57

for the last few years is when the

1:34:01

I can't remember what he's I think he's called Christian Black

1:34:03

in it, he plays

1:34:06

she when she comes when Anastasia comes to interview

1:34:08

him. It just she's asking

1:34:10

about his business, and it cuts back to him and he's

1:34:12

just fondling an abacus. And

1:34:17

that is the kind of joke that I come to

1:34:19

The Wayans for and I and I will laugh

1:34:21

at every time, and it's best. And I mean,

1:34:23

of course, the jerk. The jerk would probably

1:34:25

be my first choice, but weirdly,

1:34:28

I mean, I was I know times. People haven't

1:34:30

seen the jerk, but it's been a very popular one with your

1:34:32

podcast, so so

1:34:34

fuck it. You can have the joke. But

1:34:36

I like having you know, can I have

1:34:38

the SCO movie franchise? You want all of them?

1:34:41

Yeah? Yeah,

1:34:43

you can have that. I mean five is

1:34:46

sheen and low Hand God

1:34:48

bless him. You can have it. And you're I'm

1:34:50

very pleased with the answer. Thank you. Okay,

1:34:53

So Emerald fl thank

1:34:55

you. No, no, Emerald,

1:34:58

thank you, Emerald

1:35:01

Banalia. That's the one.

1:35:03

Thank You've been wonderful. Now, something

1:35:07

I've got to explain is that when

1:35:09

this puppet axe murderer

1:35:12

climbed through your out of its box, up

1:35:14

through the window, you were on your round, you've been asleep, you're

1:35:17

wearing your fee of a robe.

1:35:20

You came to the window. What's that noise? Like suspiri?

1:35:23

Like that rustling? And

1:35:25

you open the window and this puppet

1:35:27

and the dark crystal putting

1:35:29

out through your read Now what

1:35:31

happened was it was

1:35:34

a strong puppet and it's fucking

1:35:36

spread your red and we're

1:35:39

basically gone to put your body in this coffin,

1:35:41

and we've had to like cut off edges

1:35:44

of you because it's split around. It just doesn't

1:35:46

work. But to pull off the

1:35:48

edges of your face that they'd cut off, we

1:35:51

stuffed them in the sides of the coffin, and

1:35:53

we've put in that robe that you want don't get statue.

1:35:56

You can't get the axe out of you, so that's

1:35:58

gone in. We've had to squash down the

1:36:01

point. Is not much room left in this

1:36:03

coffin, lot less than we thought. There's only

1:36:05

enough room for one DVD. If youse

1:36:07

takeaway you to the other side, on the other side of this movie

1:36:09

night, one night, it's yours. What's the DVD

1:36:12

going to be? Scary movie franchise? Okay,

1:36:17

scary movie one scary movie

1:36:20

because nobody else is going to bring that to no

1:36:22

one has brought it. And yet everyone

1:36:24

there's going to love Saint Peter,

1:36:27

whoever else is in exactly

1:36:31

Mark all the lads, they're

1:36:33

gonna love scary movie and they

1:36:35

won't need to watch the scream because they

1:36:38

get you get I know what you did last time? You gets

1:36:40

such a wide variety and just one

1:36:42

perfect the best of all, you get

1:36:44

the best of all one. It will be a great movie night

1:36:46

as well, because the pressure will

1:36:48

be so much less be because everyone else is bringing

1:36:51

like masterpiece and never's going God

1:36:53

like this. How many times are we going to have to

1:36:55

watch dazz boot They're gonna

1:36:57

be so glad I brought it. They

1:37:00

were going, really and you're going to trust me, guys,

1:37:02

and then they're fucking raising you out on their

1:37:04

showers waits

1:37:06

fields. Yeah, and then

1:37:09

you'll die. You'll be the second third person.

1:37:12

Please do I

1:37:16

mean one of the longest minds

1:37:18

we've done. Oh, I'm so sorry. Can

1:37:20

I take this off now? No? Keep it on if

1:37:22

you haven't finished. Is

1:37:24

there a kind of deep cup question? No,

1:37:27

you've done excellent, you really have. And

1:37:30

it's very nerve racket doing a podcast, isn't

1:37:32

it. Well, you probably do loads

1:37:34

them off. It's really scary. You've

1:37:38

been excellent, you really have. And I'm going to send

1:37:40

you to the other side of a scary movie. And

1:37:44

I hope that when you go upstairs

1:37:47

and you see a cloud glowing

1:37:50

red eye to keep on walking.

1:37:53

Oh god, I thought you were going to say I was going to suck it,

1:37:55

don't fuck it. And

1:37:58

I know you think you can change in, but

1:38:00

that is a dark heart and you're going

1:38:02

to heaven all right. Thank

1:38:04

you for coming, Thank you for having me.

1:38:06

Good night bye. So

1:38:11

that was episode seventy eight. Thank

1:38:13

you so much to everyone for doing that. She doesn't

1:38:16

do a lot of podcasts, so that was a dream. Get

1:38:18

your tickets for the live show February twenty

1:38:20

sixth from the Dice AP and head over to

1:38:23

patroon dot com forward slash Brett Goldstein

1:38:25

for all the extra stuff. Go to iTunes

1:38:27

and give us a five star rating. And instead of

1:38:29

writing a review, right about the film

1:38:31

that means the most to you and why if

1:38:33

you have a look. People have been doing it. Stories are

1:38:35

beautiful. Plus it helps numbers, means

1:38:37

more people see it. I can keep making it more. You can keep drinking

1:38:40

craft beer. We can be happy for Evan un till we die.

1:38:43

Thanks to Scruby's pit and the distraction pieces of Network.

1:38:45

Has to Buddy Peace for producing it. Thanks to ACAS

1:38:47

for hosting it, to Adam Richardson for the graphics at least

1:38:49

Aladdin for the photography. Come join me

1:38:51

next week were

1:38:54

my incredible special guest, It's

1:38:56

succession star Sarah Snook.

1:38:59

I know you can't believe it, nor could

1:39:01

I. In the meantime, have

1:39:03

a lovely week and please be

1:39:06

excellent to each other,