0:03

Hello, uh, welcome to

0:06

this episode of the flats and shanks series

0:09

seven, maybe episode two, 40 minutes

0:12

is all we do now because none of us

0:14

can be bothered to pay for

0:17

upgraded zoom business. It's

0:20

more like, I'm sure it's really

0:22

cheap, but it's like, it's

0:24

the admin of having to have a password, another

0:26

account and loads of emails from zoom, which I don't want

0:28

and forgetting my password

0:31

and my kids taking my laptop and

0:33

me not knowing my password or another lap. Well, that's

0:35

easy, mate. All you got to do is change your password to

0:38

what Martin would, how does his password

0:40

address? Oh

0:43

my God. Now what we can't do, some

0:45

pods would just reveal this password.

0:48

Martin would the old boss scram off. Oh,

0:53

the old bastard. Uh, he, um,

0:56

he, horrible bastard. He

0:58

had a banking problem. I think from

1:00

get a banking problem. We were on

1:02

tour and he couldn't get any money out and

1:04

he had to ring his mom and dad at home. His mom at

1:07

home answered and said, right, there's an email on my hotmail

1:09

account. And that is the password

1:11

I need to get money out of this bank on England tour.

1:13

Right. And he had to spell out

1:20

email password to his mom. She's

1:22

logging in right.

1:22

Martin, a hotmail. And

1:24

it got caught. Right. And what's your password? And

1:26

he says, right, mom, I'll tell you the

1:28

letters. Is my mom awful? Yeah. I'll tell

1:31

you that she does sound like that. Um, he

1:33

said, right, I'll tell you the letters, but don't add them up

1:35

to make words. Don't write them

1:37

down, mom. So

1:41

we can't say what it was. It

1:44

started with the C word and ended in the letter,

1:46

the numbers six and nine. It was just awful. Like

1:49

Adam Jones and the old Welsh second row. Our old mate

1:51

who played for a long time.

1:55

That's right. Yeah. Steve, about time he

1:57

looks, he looks 55. Um, so. Adam

2:00

Jones, steam boy, he's when he went on his

2:02

first Wales to the ask for his email address, and it was always

2:04

up for the steam at hotmail.com.

2:07

I'm always on the piss. Oh, God, I

2:11

had to take his suit. It shot himself to

2:13

the dry cleaners. So I just take

2:15

it because we obviously live together. My

2:17

suit needs a clean, sorry, suit like

2:20

for postgame. You want to check to be favorite?

2:22

Just take my down with you as well. I said,

2:24

Yeah, no problem. But it's suspicious because

2:26

he's given to me in a black bag. And

2:29

then what they do is they get it and

2:31

they get it in the dry cleaners.

2:34

They take it out, don't they lie on the service, see if there's

2:36

any stains on it. Oh,

2:38

my God,

2:40

it was the brown stains.

2:42

It'd been in a black bag for about four days.

2:46

So, oh, my. Yeah,

2:49

animals. I have animals on it.

2:51

But anyway, congratulations to Adam Jones. Um,

2:54

yeah, we're getting engaged. So truth

2:56

is, when someone's as old as us and they get engaged, you're

2:59

like, oh, you're married

3:02

or oh, is it your second marriage, which is cool,

3:04

all the rage these days. But actually, you can just do

3:06

what you want and get engaged whenever you want these

3:08

days. So what I'm doing,

3:11

but you don't have a big thing about it. You don't have to have

3:13

a flash mob in the middle of Cardiff. No.

3:16

And, you know,

3:18

I've had a couple of weddings, Tommy, as we all know, and the

3:20

second one was much smaller and it was like my kids

3:23

are like, oh, you're going to do it. You're going to put a

3:25

picture on Instagram. No. Why would

3:27

I do that? Well, you got to

3:29

know. I haven't. I

3:30

don't have to do that. I'm all I'm going to do, babe,

3:34

is two kids is I'm

3:36

going to cook a big brisket and I'm going to

3:38

hide the ring in there.

3:43

I'm a slow cook, the bastard for eight

3:46

hours. We have a break that took on it. That's

3:49

like the equivalent of catching the bouquet. You're

3:51

next. Even though you're 11, even though

3:53

you're 11, you're next to be married. I

3:57

love you, Tom. Boy, good boy.

3:59

I'll go home. Come to. So that's why I have to do it

4:01

a little bit earlier for me. Yeah. Oh god,

4:03

right. Talk to me. What's going on in home? It's song Kong

4:06

There is a Q&A

4:08

I've got to do in Kowloon

4:10

Ruppy Club tomorrow night

4:13

Yeah, we're

4:15

Clive Hammond is sorting that out and David

4:17

trick is the MC myself and rocky. Oh

4:21

Tricky I tell you now what

4:23

you'd be wearing. Okay, cuz he's very similar to you

4:25

You'll have a pair of jeans on probably like Wranglers

4:28

not tapered. You'll have a really

4:30

old-school pair of deck

4:33

shoes or

4:36

Whatever the court. Yeah deck shoes aren't they? Shoes

4:39

deck shoes. Yeah shoes deck shoes. Yeah,

4:41

you'll have a Ralph Lauren shirt on And

4:47

it'd be funny as

4:49

All hell

4:51

all hell Frick I was gonna say yeah,

4:53

so and then playing golf on Thursday

4:56

hopefully

4:58

Yep, and We've

5:00

got a good thing. I think that's what

5:02

the course is lovely. All right. Oh, I think men Michael

5:05

checkers Martin Murray my

5:07

friend Martin Murray from

5:09

Swire group

5:11

Okay and then

5:14

got like a little dinner in the evening with

5:16

Brian Rennie and

5:18

A couple of the speakers is still quite

5:21

a fair on the Thursday night. Just yeah

5:24

Just trying to break us in I think slowly and then

5:26

we got the long lunch on Saturday, which I'm

5:28

speaking at. Oh Just

5:30

thinking about my intro now The

5:32

intro is anything you really got to work on you could

5:34

get a minute.

5:36

Yeah. Yeah, you got if you know The intro is

5:38

gravy from there on if you don't

5:41

Yeah, you push it man uphill Maybe

5:44

I think it may be like I'm a bit of music like Simply

5:47

the best it's coming and walking in cap

5:50

on backwards if you don't

5:52

be it get out The

5:55

book I carry around with me Forwarded

5:58

by

6:00

It's like when you and I did that often

6:02

tell people off air this story where You

6:08

We did that dinner together up in Norfolk and you were

6:10

like We basically planned it and it was like

6:12

right I'll go first shanks you go second and we'll

6:14

alternate on these bits like that Oh, don't say it.

6:16

You've just dropped my memory. I might use that I might

6:18

use that yeah I won't say I won't say I won't say the

6:20

theme of the gag either because we'll

6:22

guess it But I want to say it on our pod But

6:24

you're like just about about to introduce us on

6:27

and you were like flat see I'll go

6:29

first boy I said no no it's just stick to the plan and

6:31

it's all ad-libbed anyway But just stick to the structure and

6:33

you were like no I'm gonna start the gag about

6:36

that and I was like no definitely

6:39

don't do that because there's 800 600 people

6:41

here and

6:44

It's about 50% men It's

6:47

about 40% women and 10% children

6:49

and people had their kids there as well And it was like but

6:51

they're all leaving soon after we start the

6:53

kids But they're there for the start

6:56

big family rugby club I was like you cannot make

6:58

a joke about that and you're like yeah, I can Be

7:00

fine mate you walked on and

7:03

I gotta say I had a bit of sweat running

7:05

down my back And you absolutely

7:07

Jimin nailed it and that was it it made the night

7:09

so easy from then on well done back yourself back

7:12

yourself

7:13

Dot-com yeah, yeah, so yeah

7:16

read the room which Well,

7:18

no you didn't know the room you just put the punt

7:21

and it was too much too much not enough raise

7:23

your hands

7:26

Yeah, that is it flatty and

7:28

then I am back um I

7:30

leave then Saturday morning half-aight

7:34

And I'll mostly leave Hong Kong then yeah

7:36

mostly be sleeping I believe any working

7:38

this weekend when you get back on the URC on Sunday.

7:41

Nope

7:42

Yep, oh

7:45

Fella you've got a lovely couple of days. You'll

7:48

have a good time with Rocky Clark tricky former

7:51

bath rugby winger for years quickest

7:54

guy ever and former-present

7:56

the club and all that apart

7:58

from all that I might have

8:00

told this before, but you and I have been to a lot

8:02

of raw kestus. I'm sure I have

8:04

told this. The loosest

8:07

I've ever emceed in my whole

8:09

career, Tommy, and I've been

8:11

doing that almost as long as I play rugby now, was

8:14

the Wasp's 150th centenary dinner at the Savoy,

8:16

and it was at

8:21

the Savoy, and it's the loosest event I have ever

8:23

been to. And Tricky had

8:25

to speak at about half ten, quarter to eleven,

8:28

and I came off the stage and I was like, guys, we

8:31

had a Q&A and we had Gatlin there, and everyone

8:33

was there, and Rob Henderson

8:35

wouldn't get off the stage after the Q&A

8:37

refused to leave the stage, we just had to carry on. And

8:40

he had a mic, and he just kept shouting swear words every

8:42

time I spoke, and in the end I was like, could we cut his mic

8:44

off, please? And in the end, he fell

8:46

asleep in his chair. He was very good value, but

8:49

it was loose. And

8:51

I was like, Tricky, you can't go up there, you can't speak

8:53

now. The night's gone, they're all thinking about going

8:55

off to a club somewhere, it's done, that

8:58

you can't go up there. And he said, it'd be fine. He

9:00

walked up there, and I've

9:02

said this before, and I say it again, it's the best I've ever

9:05

seen. Best after dinner

9:07

speaking in terms of control in the room, landing

9:09

the gags I've ever seen. Amazing.

9:11

The looser I've been to was Breck and Robbie

9:13

Club before.

9:14

Oh really? The Plen Panat,

9:16

actually we just went out there on a social, and

9:19

went to the clubhouse after. They

9:22

started to do Baluge. They

9:24

put all the tables together, put loads of liquid

9:27

all over the tables, and then they're

9:29

just using the big elastic bands

9:32

around your arms. You've

9:34

got to get naked. Well, someone got

9:36

naked, I wore my pants, just didn't want to

9:39

slice anything.

9:40

Yeah, gotcha. Even though I could probably do with

9:42

it.

9:46

And they just fling you along the tables. And

9:48

I was watching it initially thinking, wow, this

9:50

is amazing. And then you start chanting

9:52

your name.

9:53

And you're looking around thinking, right, I've got to get out

9:55

of here. Nowhere to go. So

9:58

there's still a couple of videos.

9:59

flying around of that. That's

10:01

horrendous. All

10:04

the lads did that in all by one in Bath once and Andy

10:06

Beattie, the back row of the Beast,

10:10

who's an email address

10:12

on that subject used to be andthebeastgoeson

10:15

at hotmail.com, good one, but

10:19

he did it and everyone was going along it and I think Bolsch did

10:21

it and Tins were flying in and I was just like mate if

10:24

I'm not coordinated enough to do that I'll go through a table.

10:27

Beast got up and just jumped and just slammed

10:29

really high, slammed down

10:31

onto it, didn't skate forward and just split

10:33

his chin from memory. Come

10:37

on mate.

10:37

I'm not as big as you

10:39

yet but I

10:41

went down a slide in Alton Towers a couple of weeks ago

10:43

and I stopped halfway.

10:47

Well because your ass got jammed in it. I don't

10:50

know, it's like a normal slide, one

10:52

of the big slides where you go round and round. Maybe

10:55

you're not heavy enough. I

10:58

think I had the wrong

11:01

swimwear on. Yeah,

11:03

what did you have on? I

11:06

think I needed shorts.

11:09

You had the old Rod Stewart, did you?

11:14

I'm

11:16

currently sitting, Tommy, in

11:19

our upstairs sitting room

11:21

that was sitting room really that we

11:23

call the drawing room to annoy the children because they think

11:26

it sounds really snobby but we only call it that

11:28

when they're here but in the

11:30

drawing room and it is a it's not a building

11:32

site in here because next door is a building site and

11:35

the ceiling fell in as I might have explained on a former

11:38

pod in my office slash snug my

11:40

favorite room in the house

11:41

I said this is my favorite room in the house and

11:43

within five days the ceiling had fallen in

11:46

the whole ceilings had to come down ever tellies

11:48

off the wall speakers out lights off

11:50

the ceiling the whole room

11:53

has got to be repainted

11:55

we are now looking at

11:57

uh replacing

11:59

all of the furniture that was in there which you think, hey,

12:01

nice, new furniture, cannot find

12:03

the same furniture again, doesn't exist anymore.

12:06

We really like it and it's basically brand new. We've

12:09

hardly ever been used

12:11

and the insurance

12:13

company said, I'm not happy with this, we're sending

12:15

somebody round

12:17

and he came around and they were like the quotes too

12:19

high from your builders got to get a couple of quotes which

12:21

took ages and when

12:23

I didn't, took ages from one of them, not from the other

12:26

and the bloke came around and he was like, I

12:29

don't think your quotes enough. I don't

12:32

think it has an account for any new furniture. I was like,

12:34

yeah, but hopefully could clean it. He's like, mate, that's

12:36

a pink sofa fella. He's dead. So

12:39

we now got all the admin

12:41

and dust and I'm asthmatic, the

12:44

dust mate.

12:45

We thought it was all done and we're back in

12:47

the mix now.

12:48

This is where it helps front

12:50

end ITV, Robbie

12:53

Walker, money maker,

12:55

the money maker. Oh, the face. Have

12:59

you ever thought about renting your house out for like Pluto

13:01

parties? Awesome.

13:04

Yeah, Airbnb being

13:06

your whole house. I get like

13:08

the last year that the lads that do he makes I've

13:10

got that do it. The rent out, they go away in the summer,

13:13

rent out their house, whole house. The

13:16

admin that goes around getting

13:19

basically all personal items

13:21

put away, stored away, then back out again. I'm

13:23

sure you could develop a system and you could be

13:25

reasonably efficient like Paulie,

13:27

I'm a he reckons he's got it down to three or four hours

13:30

with all the kids, all five of them like digging

13:32

in. They've got their own roles crack on. I

13:36

can't organize a system to the

13:38

privatize whatever the word depersonalize

13:40

my house. And I've got four

13:42

kids to have whom a baby's a dog. I just

13:45

know it's not worth it, right?

13:47

No, it's not. You know, we got a couple

13:50

of complaints about last week's pod.

13:52

Oh, yeah.

13:53

Too much rugby, apparently.

13:55

Well, funny you

13:58

say that I was a thing on Friday night.

14:00

And this lovely bloke walked up to me, probably 55 years

14:02

old. And

14:04

he said, I love the podcast, but

14:06

you two have got to stop the rugby chat. He

14:09

said, we've heard it all by the time we get to your pod. We

14:11

don't need it. We all read the papers. And

14:13

he said, all we want to hear about is Netflix and barbecues. I

14:15

said, fella,

14:17

you're speaking my language. Ah, right.

14:20

Now listen to this. You might've watched already.

14:22

It's obviously been promoted quite well at the

14:24

moment. Robbie Williams

14:26

documentary on Netflix.

14:28

No.

14:29

It's really good. Really enjoyed it. Obviously, you know

14:31

who Robbie Williams is and his

14:33

career, but

14:35

mate,

14:36

just like an insight, because it's got loads of

14:38

footage from when he first joined Take

14:40

That and when he left

14:43

or when he went solo and basically

14:45

all the ups and downs he's had along the way. And

14:48

you often don't hear about these things. You just hear when

14:51

he's bringing a song out, maybe if he's had

14:53

to check into the priory, but

14:56

what he struggles with along the way is, I don't want

14:58

to spoil it for you, but

15:00

I'm not going to watch it so you can tell me. Really?

15:03

Not my cup of tea, but I'm interested.

15:05

You think you like him or you just not? No,

15:07

I like him. I just don't know what that sort of thing. Just

15:09

had like massive anxiety, massive

15:11

panic attacks, had this whole fear about the

15:14

UK not warming to him, not liking him.

15:16

Um, seems to be okay when he was performing

15:18

in America, but anytime he came back to UK,

15:21

just got overly, overly nervous

15:23

and having panic attacks, even though like he just nailed

15:26

Nedworth for three or four days.

15:28

Um, and a lot about his songwriting

15:30

as well and how much songwriting he did

15:33

and it's good in the relationships he had

15:35

and on the way. And obviously now, you

15:37

know, he's found peace with himself and he's

15:39

got a lovely, beautiful family,

15:41

but

15:43

what he took to get him there, you know, it was a classic

15:45

case of

15:46

he was 16 when he joined, take that

15:49

and not really having a proper sort of

15:51

teenage years,

15:52

basically, very young. Yeah.

15:55

And then later on call up with him down the

15:57

line, but I loved

15:59

it.

15:59

it like within two days I think it was

16:02

four episodes but it's good.

16:04

Yeah I read a review of it online

16:07

the other day and it said it was the

16:10

best documentary of its kind this

16:12

year. So you weren't watching it. And

16:14

I think, well it's just not, I might watch it, it's just

16:17

not what, that's not my cup of tea on telly really.

16:19

There's a couple of cars in there. Yeah

16:22

what cars you got? But it's like

16:25

the Beckham documentary, I love Robbie Williams,

16:27

I've been to take that concerts mate in Cardiff for a great time.

16:31

But if I could get tickets again I would but

16:33

you know I love his music

16:35

and I want him to be alright but at the same time and

16:38

the human stuff I do find interesting. But if I put it on

16:40

I'd probably enjoy it. It was like

16:43

when he left Take That he was obviously really young and he bought his

16:45

first album out and it was okay

16:47

the album but

16:48

it was the one song I think he

16:50

co-wrote it with Guy Chambers

16:53

who was sort of his music producer

16:55

for a long long time. They worked together very closely

16:58

and it's all to do with that relationship as well. But

17:00

Angels was a song that just connected

17:02

with everyone.

17:03

Oh yeah it was huge, it still is huge now

17:05

but

17:07

I also forget how many good songs

17:09

he's brought out. Road to Mandalay was

17:12

it? Road to Mandalay?

17:13

He made it up? Might

17:14

have made it up. Road to Perdition, that's a

17:16

great film with Tom Hanks, it's one of my favourites.

17:20

But no he's obviously, he's absolutely mega and that's

17:23

not the point, his brain does what it does to

17:25

him and that is very sad. But hopefully... Do

17:27

you know what I'm excited about on the plane? What?

17:30

Well

17:30

I've already pre-ordered food, I've pre-ordered

17:33

a burger,

17:34

you know what I'm like. Standard. I'm going

17:36

to arrive at the hotel and have a club sandwich.

17:38

Again, standard. See

17:39

what channels you've got. Do you know what channels you've got? Do

17:41

you know that? When

17:45

we play out in France

17:48

we stay in the same hotel all the time on the Champs-Élysées

17:52

and

17:53

it was great because in

17:54

the team room you'd have

17:56

a big TV

17:58

and they've obviously

17:59

got these they've got

18:01

rude channels out there naughty channels it would

18:04

just be on a porter the whole time.

18:06

It's running constantly. Yeah I

18:08

remember I

18:09

was doing McGarriff's company

18:12

and used to get

18:14

like two or three

18:16

minutes free till it came up with a screen

18:18

that you had to pay but

18:21

we worked out that if you turned off the mains back

18:24

on again you

18:25

get another two minutes free. Oh God. It's

18:31

good stuff though isn't it? It's just it's

18:33

you know. Right a passage mate.

18:35

You're trying to not think about the game

18:37

aren't you so yeah you know. Yeah it's nothing like watching

18:40

pornography with your friends can't imagine anything

18:42

weirder. Actually they mention it. Yeah

18:46

I read a really good article a few years ago about why men shouldn't

18:48

watch it and stuck with me fella.

18:51

Shouldn't watch it you got you got a big problem with

18:53

it but. Well why you

18:56

got like a power bank and a lead on you then. Well

19:00

I can't see I'm plugging your telly at the mains mate. But

19:03

I

19:03

the other thing I won't not I won't watch

19:05

or refuse to watch I everyone said it's amazing

19:08

but no it's not true. But the

19:10

Beckham documentary is I love Beckham. I

19:12

love him he's a national treasure I love all that

19:14

stuff. I just can't I'm just

19:16

not enthused by those

19:19

programs I read a review of it I think I mentioned it on a pod

19:21

recently that is the most aggressive review

19:23

negative view I think I've ever read about any television

19:26

program ever you on that one I'm with you on this

19:28

I'm not Camilla Long Camilla

19:30

Long I think it was that wrote the review and

19:33

I always just like got a TV TV

19:35

program review on Google and the Guardian is a

19:37

pretty reliable run to market reviews

19:40

and it was like whoa she has I

19:42

think it might be in the Times actually that one but she has wherever

19:45

it was she absolutely slammed it and it's like

19:47

this is just content

19:50

it's viewed as an insight what it really is

19:52

is really tightly curated just to make

19:55

improve augment their brand and make loads of money which

19:57

is absolutely fine but it's presented as something else.

20:00

and it's kind of like... I

20:03

don't resent that, I'm just not interested in that

20:05

at all. What I

20:08

was going to say to me about the plane is I'm looking

20:10

for it, I'm really hoping they've got Oppenheimer

20:13

on

20:14

TVs there, on the movies, on the plane. Because

20:16

I'm not seeing that yet.

20:17

Yes, no, I haven't. Yes, but to watch it. Yeah,

20:21

it might be a cut down version on a plane in

20:23

case kiddies watch it, that's the only problem.

20:25

That'd be alright. I can deal with not

20:27

seeing a nipple flat, that's fine.

20:29

You keep bringing them up. We're

20:33

watching Time at the moment, which

20:35

is about being in prison. The second series, the first

20:38

series was amazing,

20:40

and the second series

20:43

is really, really good. If you hadn't seen the first

20:45

series, as a standalone, the second would

20:47

be really good, there are only two in, but I think

20:49

there's only three actually. I'll try.

20:51

But it's really good, it's

20:53

clever, it's good. The first

20:55

one had Stephen Graham and Sean Bean in it, and it's like, well,

20:58

it's like having Al Pacino and Rob De Niro in it, in a

21:00

BBC drama, do you know what I mean? It's quite

21:03

hard to follow, but next

21:05

series is good. It's like

21:07

watching Sylvester Stallone documentary

21:09

as well, that's on Netflix. The

21:12

one about Arnie is really good.

21:14

He's brought one out as well, so at

21:17

the moment he's just

21:19

talking about his younger life really, about how he

21:22

was born. How he was

21:25

born, how half his face is paralyzed, how he's

21:27

trying to become an actor, but no one really

21:29

would take him too seriously because they thought he

21:31

was going to be a villain the whole time because

21:34

of his voice and the way he looked with his eyes, and

21:36

then how he got into writing because he couldn't

21:38

get any parts, and then how he wrote

21:41

Rocky, rewrote Rocky, and then made

21:43

it what it is now. And

21:45

cast and

21:47

the actors in it as well. It's

21:49

really interesting because obviously, like

21:52

anyone like him, he's got a massive story because

21:55

he wrote, he

21:57

directed, and he starred in it as well. all

22:00

those three when you're like 22-23

22:02

years old. Yeah. Yeah

22:06

I mean he did get caught with

22:10

human growth hormone at the old services didn't they

22:12

all their customers once. Reesweb.

22:16

Sorry did you say Reesweb? Sorry Sylvester Stallone.

22:19

What's happening? What's happening with Reesweb? Oh

22:21

I'm not sure I made that up. I don't

22:24

know. The papers. What? The

22:26

growth hormone. He got he got he gave

22:29

he didn't he get he failed a drug test didn't he

22:31

for growth hormone. I thought it said in the papers. Yeah

22:33

I'm not sure exactly I saw him the other day actually at

22:35

Phil Bennett Foundation didn't they seemed he seemed okay.

22:39

It'll come out in the wash. Should

22:42

I just. I hope he's alright then.

22:44

Yeah I do. I really like Rees. He was looking immaculate.

22:47

I have to say that. Like I was looking. Yeah of course he was. Oh

22:49

so he's demanded it says here the well the first thing I've

22:51

got is he demands a B sample.

22:56

Yeah test positive growth hormone.

23:01

Yeah well I hope that works out. I hope

23:03

it is

23:04

not the case. Sometimes it's good to heal

23:06

in your body though if you've got like a real severe injury.

23:09

Oh mate like I honestly think like

23:11

I I wouldn't really know where

23:14

to start but it's

23:16

like people pay subscriptions for you

23:20

know telly or vitamins or

23:22

protein powders that sort of stuff. I

23:24

reckon that you know there are certain there are certain

23:27

things that would be massively frowned upon in the rugby fraternity

23:29

that if you could just pay it you know what you

23:31

pay for Netflix every month and just have a bit of liquid

23:34

youth

23:35

bit of HGH shabbed in just a little bit jabbed

23:37

in the only thing I know nothing about it then I

23:39

think if you have isn't it right if you have tumor

23:42

a tumor or cancer it grows at a significantly

23:44

faster rate if your growth hormone is spiked

23:46

or I don't know that's why I just don't bother doing

23:48

that stuff wouldn't know where to start

23:51

but so I still I did say

23:53

that you know HGH is nothing I think

23:55

was his favorite quote and it's like mate it's not even

23:57

it's well yeah you might like

23:59

it you I might like that one. I'm sort of an episode

24:02

in and it's really interesting.

24:04

So I'll be good. I'm

24:07

more up for that. I'm more than

24:09

a puff piece on, but they're all kind

24:11

of all these documentaries are there

24:13

a little bit like aren't

24:15

I a legend and I find that a little bit uninteresting,

24:18

but the Ricky Hatton one I loved, which

24:20

we've spoken about, loved it. So

24:23

I was great. I watched Louis Faroo interview

24:25

Anthony Joshua.

24:26

And you're good. This week. You've seen that? Well, no.

24:29

Yeah, it's all right. Yeah, it's

24:32

all right. And I love both of them, but I

24:34

think he seems to be

24:36

like Anthony Joshua

24:39

is seems to be massively or

24:42

preoccupied by the

24:44

feeling his feeling that the British

24:46

press and maybe the therefore

24:48

the public by proxy or whatever, don't

24:51

give him the credit his achievements deserve.

24:54

He seems to have a big which are what

24:57

obviously clutch double world

24:59

champion, double heavyweight world champion. And

25:01

if you know, it's one of those things that I don't know if

25:04

you ask about heavyweight Tyson Fury,

25:06

obviously is a massive name, but Joshua

25:09

had a massive impact on what was a really stagnant,

25:12

uninteresting heavyweight division. Yeah,

25:15

but until he fights Tyson Fury, then

25:18

then I just I can't

25:20

really buy into it because

25:22

everyone's won this fight for years and

25:24

years. And I just don't want to see at the end of

25:26

their careers when they're just looking for a pair. I want to see

25:28

them fight in their prime, which is which is now

25:32

and

25:34

they've got to sort that out. It is

25:35

pathetic. That is

25:36

the fight. Yeah.

25:39

So I'm I'm I'm watching the documentary thinking

25:41

a couple of things like there's a bit edgy couple

25:43

of points. It looked almost a bit confrontational,

25:45

a bit awkward, but in a good

25:48

way. I'm also thinking

25:50

Louis through is like the greatest of the great but

25:52

I'm there was bits where it was edited, I think just

25:54

felt like he was interrupting Anthony Joshua all the time

25:56

and a couple of times I thought I'd just let him speak like he

25:59

was going to carry on then but Louis Theroux is just the master.

26:02

He did Tyson Fury impressions that were amazing.

26:05

Like he was really, really good. And he

26:07

asked the right stuff. Like he's brave. I think he's

26:09

amazing but didn't adore this

26:11

documentary like I normally do. But

26:13

halfway through it, I'm thinking what you're thinking. If

26:16

this is your primary concern, like you want to earn

26:19

money and that stuff.

26:20

And

26:21

it's like there was a few contradictions. Like

26:24

he said, you know, you said it's all about the

26:26

money, Anthony, or in those similar words.

26:28

And he said, no, I mentioned doing

26:31

it for the money once. And I mentioned it once

26:33

and everyone's just blown it up. And he's

26:35

like, no, no, because you mentioned it here too. Oh,

26:37

yeah, well, I mentioned it there too. Like it's not a crime

26:40

to what money. So it's like, yeah,

26:42

but it's like, if it's not all about the money,

26:44

and it's all about legacy, fight

26:47

him then and take less money. Don't demand 50

26:50

million or 30 million. So do it for a shitty

26:52

little 10 million. You know, do that

26:55

just fight him then if it really isn't

26:57

about it's easy for me to say it's not my job. But

27:00

actually, if my primary if

27:02

my primary thing was that

27:04

people didn't respect me didn't respect me, and the only way

27:06

they respect me was hosting

27:08

a game on ITV, where I'm going to get

27:10

paid four pounds instead of my normal fee,

27:13

I would do the game I would do the tournament for four

27:15

pounds. If it meant I could find

27:17

peace, I think 15 to 30 years ago, though, these

27:20

boys would fight, they would fight. Yeah,

27:23

big fights. Now it's all to do. Not good, isn't

27:25

it? Money, it's all to do with rights. It is knackered.

27:27

It's completely knackered. Like you look at, I

27:30

don't know, like the late 90s, early

27:32

noughties, you had huge fights all

27:34

the time, all the time, like at

27:36

least once twice a year, big,

27:39

Holyfield, Tyson. Yeah. Kazagi,

27:42

you bank. Yeah,

27:43

you know, there was there was low Steve Collins, Nigel

27:45

Ben. Yes.

27:46

All always. But now it's like,

27:49

happens once every 10 years. It

27:52

could kind of fight him now as well, because Tyson

27:54

Fury didn't look

27:56

that great. And his last one.

27:58

So I read it. I read

27:59

one of the reviews of it that said he

28:02

basically looked like he hadn't trained hard

28:04

enough for it and he

28:07

did.

28:09

We're not body shaming one of the

28:10

greatest heavyweights potentially of all time.

28:13

He's never been ripped. He just looked like he was really

28:15

heavy but anyone

28:16

looks

28:21

like that next to Francis Nganu. I think Anthony Joshua

28:23

would look a little bit like a speaker piss

28:25

neck to Francis Nganu. He's an absolute freak show.

28:31

I know these fights generate loads of money and if I was a

28:33

heavyweight boxer and I got offered, I'm making numbers up 30

28:36

million to fight some YouTuber. Shit

28:38

me mate, I'll do it naked. You do don't

28:40

you?

28:41

Ten minute warning.

28:43

Oh God.

28:54

There's a

29:21

film on Netflix called The Killer

29:24

which has just come out. Michael Schloepender.

29:27

Fast Bender. What did you call me?

29:30

It's got five stars in the Guardian in

29:32

the pet Guardiola which never happens mate,

29:34

very rarely happens. Downloaded.

29:37

Ready. Well done mate.

29:40

Well done mate. Last point on

29:42

series now. Have you got anything for me to watch that's

29:44

gripping?

29:46

I don't mean anything like serial

29:49

killer. Struggling at the moment. No,

29:52

same. Okay, that's fine.

29:54

But it's autumn. I feel like all the good stuff should

29:56

be coming out now because it's autumn but nothing's

29:58

quite... grip me recently and I'm

30:01

kind of empty on the TV front.

30:03

I know we

30:04

got told off for doing too much rugby.

30:06

Oh, there you go.

30:08

Yeah, I know. We'll just pick

30:10

out a couple of instances because if you

30:12

want to catch up on rugby, listen to other pods

30:15

or watch the ITV highlights with you in Topsy

30:17

or listen to the unloaded UOC

30:20

show. But the

30:23

red card at

30:25

the game you covered at the weekend. Yeah.

30:30

Oh, for the leg out.

30:32

It's a red card for me.

30:34

I don't know what you said.

30:36

Whether you agree or not, I think

30:39

that's red.

30:40

Every day of week.

30:42

You might notice I'm standing up, Tommy, as you're, Tommy

30:44

can see me in the view that the listeners can't. I'm

30:47

standing up because my

30:49

back's going to expose yourself.

30:51

Yeah, I'm not. It's like I'm singing in a

30:54

booth now, like I'm doing, what's

30:57

it called, a Band-Aid song. Live 80. Yeah,

31:00

I'm Band 80. Live 80.

31:03

Yeah, looks like I'm doing that. The old back's

31:06

going.

31:07

My point, what I said was I know

31:09

the letter of the law and

31:12

all that, but that is just balance,

31:15

unintentional, bit of empathy,

31:19

let it go. That's what I thought. And

31:21

I was with Nollie and she was a fullback. She

31:23

said the same. And I looked along at Stuart Hogg, who

31:26

was obviously knew his onions at fullback. And I

31:28

just, we're both commentating on different channels, the

31:30

same game. And I was like, would

31:32

you reckon he said never a red? And then from

31:35

what I haven't watched it on TNT,

31:38

but I think Benny K thought the same. And then Ollie

31:40

Woodburn, who's current play, but

31:43

he's the teammate of the

31:45

accused.

31:47

That's slightly different, but I think, I

31:50

don't know. It's

31:52

one of those letter of the law jobs. Yeah,

31:54

I spoke to two World Cup referees.

31:57

I spoke to... couple

32:00

of world player of the years that have got

32:02

it and they think it was a red card. But

32:05

I spoke to Bono. If

32:07

you miss time, you jump when you go

32:10

for the ball and you collide

32:12

with someone, it can

32:14

be a red card. That way, same

32:17

instant supplies, I think when you're taking a ball like

32:19

that, he looks at the player, the foot

32:21

comes up, he's trying to buy himself a little bit of time, doesn't want to get

32:23

smashed.

32:24

I think he knows exactly what he's doing and

32:27

red cards. Really?

32:28

Yep. You know what I'm like, Flats? You know

32:31

what I'm like?

32:31

You think the game's gone soft?

32:33

I think we have

32:35

too many red cards. But for me... You

32:37

hate player safety. You hate player safety. That

32:40

is

32:40

a red card.

32:41

I'm really surprised if that's a red card. What we've gone by

32:43

on... It happened in the World Cup, happened

32:46

to Palo a Dog Woo before. He

32:48

got a six week ban. Yeah.

32:51

It looks too obvious to me, David. So

32:53

there we are. And that's what players do to stop

32:55

them getting smashed, stop them getting hit hard, they

32:57

land on the floor. It looked very

33:00

unnatural. So there we are. You're

33:02

right, it's gone. We agreed to disagree, but yeah, I

33:04

have spoken to people way

33:06

above who you listed. And

33:09

I'm on this massive WhatsApp group with basically

33:12

the last 10 years players.

33:14

I have been playing players. Bob

33:16

Duar and Nick Mallet.

33:18

Rasi Rasmus. I rang Eddie

33:20

Jones.

33:22

Did you? I spoke Daniel Craig

33:24

about it. How's the answer? Konichiwa.

33:27

And Idris Elba.

33:28

Yeah. I spoke to a load

33:30

of celebrities about it. A couple of quick highlights.

33:33

George Ford was mega for sale

33:36

against Bristol. Second half, sale really

33:38

got it together and George Ford looked immaculate.

33:42

Honjo Pollard made a massive difference for

33:44

Leicester Tigers, even though they didn't win. He looked

33:46

great. Marcus Smith looked fantastic as

33:48

well. Finn Smith for Northampton

33:50

in there. That win over Chiefs. You

33:53

got a lot of fly-offs doing really good things

33:55

in the prem.

33:56

Dave, can I ask you a question?

33:59

I'm not seeing too much.

34:01

Maybe you have, maybe you haven't, because obviously you just

34:03

highlight Marcus Smith. But Jared Evans, what's

34:08

the word on the street? How's he been going? I've heard

34:10

it's been okay.

34:11

He's played really well. The word on the street is really

34:13

good. They really like him. He's everything I've heard.

34:17

He really suits the way Quinn's want to play. Realistically,

34:21

he's going to be, like most players,

34:23

would be an understudy for Marcus Smith. Quinn's

34:27

might use Smith at 15 here or there,

34:29

when people are injured, but they don't need him as a 15. They've

34:32

got plenty. They've even got Tyrone Green

34:34

on the wing, who is brilliant at fullback after Mike

34:36

Brown left. So they've got options on options

34:38

at 15. So Jared Evans

34:40

will, but because Marcus Smith goes away

34:43

a lot and all that stuff, and people

34:45

get knocks, he will play quite a

34:47

lot of games for Quinn's, and they really, really like him. So

34:50

they're quite chuffed with that signing. Because there's no point

34:52

in having really exciting

34:55

outside backs if you don't have a 10

34:58

who is, A, a running threat

35:00

himself, and B, really good at

35:02

setting them alight and creating space. Yep. And

35:05

that's why I think we'll see

35:07

probably a

35:08

different way of attack for Wales coming

35:11

up in the Six Nations. Dan

35:13

Bigger won't be there, he's retired, and

35:16

he's

35:18

good at game management, he's good at

35:20

positional play, making sure Wales

35:22

play in the right areas. Not high risk

35:24

rugby, quite low risk really,

35:27

but I think whether Sam

35:29

Costello's back fit, Johan Lloyd's been playing well,

35:31

and I said this a couple of times on different

35:33

platforms, this

35:36

is a massive period for him now, because

35:38

he's playing well,

35:39

but he's got from now until January

35:42

really to form up a partnership

35:44

with Garth Davis, Sam Costello's injured at

35:46

the moment, to

35:48

maybe warrant a starting spot. So

35:50

it's in his hands at the moment, he's looking good,

35:52

even though the Scarlett's aren't playing particularly

35:55

well. All four Welsh

35:57

teams lost at home at the weekend, which is the first time.

36:00

ever in the history of the

36:03

competition. I feel

36:05

like with Johan Lloyd,

36:07

tell me if you think this is... You look at him

36:09

as like a James Hook and you think if he's going to go on

36:12

and amass as many caps for Wales as James

36:14

Hook did, he's got to start getting in that starting 15

36:16

soon. He's got to be that sort of player

36:18

where they say, well, we've got to get him in somewhere

36:21

so he goes here. If that's the end then

36:23

great, because he seems that talented to me

36:25

whenever I watch him. But

36:26

if you

36:27

play in 10 internationally, you

36:29

can't just be a makeshift 10 at your club. You can't

36:31

just be filtering it out. You have to be. Yeah, the

36:34

guy. You can get away with it at 13, wing, 15. But 10

36:40

is so important. You have to be playing at every... What

36:42

he does have in his favour is he

36:44

is unbelievably versatile. So he can

36:46

play in multiple positions. So

36:50

therefore, you probably want him in your squad because

36:52

he can cover, whether he starts

36:54

or whether he's on the bench, he can cover loads and loads of

36:57

positions, which is key, which is golden. Exactly

36:59

what you want.

37:00

So there was

37:03

nothing really massive

37:05

that went on in the UFC. There was

37:07

a red card to tame Basham. Just

37:11

Ross Burn is running back to

37:13

pick up the ball. Basham just leaves his elbow

37:15

out, tries to connect with Ross Burn's head, gets

37:18

him a little bit at the top. Luckily, he didn't get

37:20

him right on the draw. But

37:22

he got red carded straight away and I'd

37:25

imagine he'll get quite a hefty ban.

37:28

I haven't seen it, but I think the game has gone

37:31

soft and it shouldn't have been a red.

37:33

Yeah, maybe. Absolutely

37:35

not. It'll get a big ban, I reckon, for that. It's

37:38

too obvious. It was like rugby

37:40

when we played. You could

37:41

get away with it. Yeah, when men were men. Yeah,

37:45

so much of it is about

37:47

self-control just in the moment, isn't it? Yeah,

37:49

it is. They were getting hammered by Leinster and it was

37:51

a tough game. We've got a minute left, that's right.

37:53

Let's go.

37:54

Can I just inform you? We've

37:57

got Chuckland Ladies' Day coming up in March,

37:59

right? The squad has been

38:01

assembled, Steve Spears is in. Yeah.

38:04

Lee Byrne is coming with

38:07

Roger Harry, my mate. Geth

38:09

Jones is coming with him as well. I'm

38:11

on that table so they've got... Jason Fox is

38:13

coming, isn't he? Three world-class looking

38:15

blokes with me. God. Including

38:18

me. Yeah, Jason Fox is coming as well so

38:21

it's going to be good.

38:23

And we all know that Dean Schofield, former sale sharks

38:25

on England's second row will be there as well. It

38:27

just makes every day better.

38:28

Always. We all will. Never

38:31

see it. Well done mate. Good pod.

38:33

Not too much.

38:34

I'd be well done. You look after that back now. Do you

38:36

want to come to my pub with me? Get it stretched?

38:39

None of that. Good luck, boy. Cheers,

38:41

everyone.