Today we are talking about the insidious business of people pleasing. It’s something that so many of us do without even thinking. It’s become a habit that my guest Helen Snape gently reminds us that we can change. She’s been there herself.

Helen became a transformational relationship coach after 19 years in Human Resources and Development. She works with women on breaking free from people-pleasing, codependency, and bad relationships to build a life they love. Helen loves walking in the woods, meditating daily, and dancing to YouTube videos. She lives with her partner in Surrey, England.

Helen and I talk about the roots of people pleasing in her life, how a scarcity mindset limits us, and how to reparent our inner child. She opens up about how a childhood of bullying made her “dial down” her true self and what served as her wake-up call. She also busts the idea that women should be nice.

After the interview, Helen confessed off the air that she’s only recently begun to tell her story. I admire this so much. We as humans are bound by stories. We see our pain, our joy, our idiosyncrasies in others. I asked her if I could share that with you. She agreed. I think you’ll understand after hearing her powerful story, which she so eloquently tells.

Get a copy of Helen’s new book, “Building Healthy Boundaries - An Over-Givers Guide to When to Say Yes and How to Say No in Relationships.” Head over to www.fortiesstories.com to find out how do that and connect with Helen.

I’d love to hear what you think about the episode. Is people pleasing something you struggle with or have overcome? Every episode has a comments section on the website, so please check it out and share your thoughts. We’re all in this together. You can also email me and find me on social media. Finally, if you are enjoying the show, I hope you will forward it to a friend and get a conversation started.

Thanks for listening!