We have a tough one today. Helping me tackle this episode we have the return of Kristen Rau and Caroline Allen, plus for the first time on the show, my roommate Amanda.

We start things off by talking about porn and the general consumption of it amongst us, why we use it to masturbate, whether it's necessary, and why Kristen doesn't watch it period.

Then we dig into the recent rape accusations surrounding porn star and until now BDSM and porn-done-right poster boy James Deen. Deen was accused by fellow porn star and former girlfriend Stoya of raping her Saturday evening. Stoya returned to twitter after a brief hiatus to make the allegations on Twitter, stating, "James Deen held me down and fucked me while I said no, stop, used my safeword. I just can't nod and smile when people bring him up anymore."

We go into a bit of Deen's background, why he had been lauded for his work by so many women (and men), and why this was particularly disheartening to here.

Then we get into a very complicated and nuanced discussion about sexual assault, and where Deen's actions stand in the context of other rapists like Bill Cosby. Is there an increased danger in the power structures afforded to celebrities? Through the discussion we share our own stories of sexual assault. 

We then talk about affirmative consent, what it means, and whether we agree that verbal consent must be obtained and maintained throughout every sexual encounter. Some movements even believe that all sexual partners should have to sign a contract explicitly stating that all people involved in the sexual encounter are of sound body and mind and consent to the forthcoming interaction. We all agree there are lines that have been blurred by poor communication in sexual dynamics, pronounced by our slut-shaming culture.

Of course this somehow leads me to be encouraged to play an old clip of a rape joke I used to do.

We end things on a slightly lighter discussion about wether it's reasonable to tell your first date that you want to sleep with them or not prior to meeting them.

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