0:00

Hi everyone and welcome back to the Funhaus

0:02

podcast. Here I am today with my

0:04

co-host, Lindsey Washburn. Say hi, Lindsey. Hi. And

0:07

here I have, I think, debuting on the

0:09

pod. No, no, no, no. When

0:11

were you here? On this podcast? Yes, on

0:13

this version of the podcast. When we were doing

0:15

it in the other room. The show and tell.

0:18

I was on it for a minute. Okay, well,

0:20

debuting in this room, since it's been all

0:23

redone, is Omar De Armas. How you doing,

0:25

Omar? Hello, hello, I'm doing okay. Cool, so

0:27

you know, as we've been foretelling

0:29

for the last several podcasts, we're ending

0:31

the podcast. Yeah, what are we gonna do with this room?

0:34

What are we allowed to do with this room? I mean, it's

0:36

still our podcast room. We have other podcasts.

0:38

Okay. What? You're

0:40

not the only one. What? It says

0:42

Funhaus on the wall. It does, we'll have to do something

0:44

about that. Live, pray, eat,

0:47

Funhaus on the wall. I live here. Anyway,

0:50

what I decided to do was go through all

0:52

of our podcasts that we've done since me and

0:55

Lindsey started. I was like, what are the most

0:57

successful? What got the views? What got the fucking

0:59

clicks, baby? What do we want to do again,

1:01

maybe, before

1:03

we end this thing? And the one that I found

1:05

was the Am I the Asshole podcast

1:08

that we did with John Smith many,

1:10

many months, many moons ago. So

1:12

I decided, let's do that before we end the

1:14

thing. Let's do another Am I the Asshole one

1:17

since it seemed to get those clicks. Okay. And

1:19

that's what we're all about here at Funhaus, right? Those clicks. How many more

1:21

do we got? Three, I think. So

1:24

this is not even, you didn't even bring me in for

1:26

like the penultimate. What's it

1:28

called when it's- This is like the

1:30

least valuable of them. That's not true. That's not true. And

1:32

they're like, oh, what's the one that we can do with

1:34

Omar? The penultimate's the last one, right? And what's the one,

1:36

right? No, no, no. Penultimate is the second to last. So

1:39

the ultimate is the last one? That's what ultimate is. And

1:41

then the penultimate is the second one. What's the third to

1:43

last? Shit. Tersha ultimate. It's

1:45

a filler episode. The shit ultimate. Yeah, it's the

1:47

filler one. That's why you could spare having me

1:49

on here. No, I think that you would be

1:51

very good at this, Omar. You

1:54

know, this am I the asshole question,

1:56

Aaron. So one thing that I had some

1:58

complaints in the- When I read the comments

2:01

some people were like it's hard to do

2:03

this a little bit because some of these are so

2:05

fucking long Oh, yeah, whenever I did it the first

2:07

episode I just kind of paraphrased it then some people

2:09

were like we didn't get all the context Well,

2:12

I mean paraphrased but still have all the context right?

2:14

So I'm basically gonna try to do my best to

2:16

do both of those I'm gonna not read the entire

2:18

thing some of these are just like go on for

2:20

way too long, but all you know Some

2:23

of them I might need to do that But

2:25

if I if I ever if you're ever like,

2:27

okay, give me more context will do I'll dive

2:29

back deeper into this I'll keep you honest. Let's

2:31

go. All right, you ready Lindsay? Yeah, I'm gonna

2:33

figure out what's the third to last

2:35

episode of Paul But I keep getting

2:37

very specific results about the Owl House

2:39

and Endeavor Okay, endeavor

2:41

like the spaceship Endeavor

2:43

season 9 episode 3. Oh, there's

2:45

a TV show Yes,

2:48

are you the asshole though you're asking me no

2:50

not me we know that I am

2:56

Let's see though if you think I am based on my

2:58

answers to these questions Here we go.

3:01

Am I the asshole for telling a

3:03

friend's friend that he couldn't keep the

3:05

jackpot that he hit on my antique

3:07

slot machine About seven hundred dollars

3:09

this guy won. So basically I'll just paraphrase with

3:11

this what happened You know This guy has an

3:13

old slot machine that has a bunch of quarters

3:15

in there, you know and you can kind of

3:17

it's fun if you have some extra change you

3:19

can kind of come in and Use

3:22

it and he says that usually the most

3:24

he's ever seen anyone won was like 50 bucks

3:26

or something But

3:29

then this one guy came in on at a party

3:31

he was playing with his own quarters So that's why

3:33

his friend thinks that he's not an asshole that he

3:35

played with his own quarters and then he won seven

3:37

hundred bucks He's like well Hey, I should be able

3:39

to keep this and then the guy who owns the

3:41

slot machine is like dude I can't be just giving

3:43

you so hundred dollars except where did all that money

3:45

come from? Is there this is I need additional content

3:47

Okay. Yes, is all of the

3:49

money in there from random people playing it at

3:51

random times. That is a wonderful question Let

3:54

me because the day of that guy does definitely

3:56

deserves that money. Yeah Um,

4:01

continue talking while I look for this. This is the

4:04

problem with this. You know, I mean, yeah, I'm

4:06

just curious as well, because it's not if it's something

4:08

where he won the jackpot, but there's not enough money

4:10

in the thing to like to pay out. And he

4:12

goes, you owe me seven hundred dollars. And it's like,

4:14

that's different. That's different. Kindly fuck off. Yeah.

4:17

If that money was in there and somebody

4:19

wanted it, they fucking did that. That's the

4:21

that's the fun of having that thing there

4:23

for people to play. Right. Sometimes the

4:25

house loses. Yeah. Well, I think not

4:27

very often. Um,

4:30

he says, uh, if

4:32

if I had just stocked it up with

4:34

a bunch of quarters for people to have

4:36

fun with at a party, I might take

4:38

a little bit of it. Like, well, come

4:40

on, man, this is like this is a

4:42

gag. Like, right. Yeah. Back into the machine.

4:44

It's like a novelty. But seven hundred dollars

4:46

is a lot of fucking quarters. Uh huh.

4:48

Who's got seven hundred dollars worth of quarters

4:50

laying around to stock, stock their fucking toy

4:53

machine with that. Thirty

4:55

two thousand twenty eight thousand.

4:58

So I unfortunately don't do math. I

5:01

even though I'm trying to speed read through

5:03

this thing, I can't really find whether it's

5:05

but I get the from everyone's comments. I

5:07

think that it is other people. A lot

5:09

of it is. Oh, yeah. The person who

5:11

won. That's their money. Yeah. OK. And if

5:14

you don't want something like that to happen, that

5:16

needs to be a conversation about your machine. Just

5:18

a little sign there. Take the money out. Like leave,

5:20

leave a hundred bucks or whatever. Like, how many quarters

5:22

do you need in there for it to be a

5:24

fun thing for people to just cycle quarters into 20

5:27

bucks? That's a lot of fucking quarters. We

5:29

used to have a slot machine. My

5:31

parents had one like in their basement.

5:33

It was like tokens, though.

5:36

And so, yeah, kind of old

5:38

vintagey one. Yeah. Carol

5:40

Carol Pulsar. Yeah, that

5:43

that person is. Wait, what was the who's who's

5:45

asking this question? The guy who owns the slot

5:47

machine. Is the guy who owns the slot machine

5:49

is being an asshole. Yeah. Well, the

5:51

top comment is you are the asshole. You left

5:53

money in the machine knowing people might win some

5:55

of it. You are perfectly fine letting people use

5:57

it as though it were real and keeping their

6:00

money if they. They didn't win and let the

6:02

jackpot build. And now that someone actually won, you

6:04

don't want it to be real anymore. Yeah, yeah.

6:07

No, that's 100%. Yeah. You

6:10

definitely need to, at the very least,

6:12

have a sign or something or have

6:14

some sort of rule that is clearly

6:16

stated, you know, you cannot win

6:18

$700. This is a slot machine that my parents

6:20

had. I mean, you can't see it because

6:22

it's such a shitty photo, but yeah,

6:25

you can't really see it. But it's called Caro Caro

6:27

Pulsar, and I just pulled that out of my brain

6:29

just now when we were talking about that. I

6:32

definitely, my dad had a little mini slot machine,

6:34

or it wasn't even a slot machine, it was

6:36

a poker, it was like a five-card poker machine.

6:38

Like a video poker thing? Like a video poker

6:40

game. And so that

6:42

was kind of a fun novelty thing that we

6:45

had and stuff that I totally, when I was

6:47

like, you know, this was four or five, I

6:49

just remember going like, money, hey! Hey! I

6:52

won this, this is mine now. What

6:54

did you buy candy with? Is it weird? It's

6:57

not weird to just have one of those things lit

7:00

up and going in your house. It's

7:02

not weird? Like legally? No, not legally.

7:05

That's a cool thing for people to come in like, oh, check out

7:07

my fucking slot machine, put your money in it. If you're like in

7:09

the kind of family or the hosts that

7:11

are like, oh, come over for cards, come

7:13

over for this party. It's like, same thing

7:15

as having a little video arcade that people

7:18

could play, or ping pong or

7:20

pool, that's what that seems like to me. If

7:22

you were smart though, you would not have a

7:25

coin-based one and have it be like tickets, and

7:27

then you have like your own little chucky cheese

7:30

situation where it's like, all right, friend, you won

7:32

this. You won this, finger trap. You get a

7:34

little yo-yo. You get some bouncy balls. Right. It's

7:36

like, I know it says you won $50, but

7:38

this is what $50 gets at my exchange rate

7:41

here. Okay, so

7:43

that was one. That was one. Cool. All

7:45

right, I'm gonna go to more. This

7:49

is gonna be a little, we're gonna just be

7:51

chilling out here. So if there's a few

7:53

lulls in silence of me reading this, don't

7:55

worry about it. Just keep

7:57

listening. the

8:00

asshole for demanding back a prize I won

8:02

from an ex-girlfriend at the fair. So

8:05

this one's short enough I can read it. So

8:07

pretty much I'm reading like. I

8:09

already have my answer. I already have my answer.

8:11

Okay. They went to the state fair not very

8:13

long ago. They won. He won her an

8:16

Angry Birds plushie. She eventually broke up with him

8:18

via text which upset him. And he thought, you

8:20

know, if you don't respect me enough to break

8:22

me up, break up with me in person, then

8:24

you don't deserve anything I won for you. So

8:26

after this, he texted her that he wanted everything

8:28

back. He said he's a 15 year old. He's

8:31

greeting his Angry Birds doll. And

8:34

so, and then, oh yeah, and then when she

8:36

says, when I saw her at school, I told

8:38

her when I

8:41

told her where to meet me to give me my

8:43

Angry Birds plushie back and she angrily handed it to

8:45

me and then I walked away. Yeah. Anytime

8:47

I tell anyone about this, they said I'm being petty. Am I the

8:49

asshole? Anybody who's seen the episode of Friends

8:51

where Rachel has to give back this shirt that

8:54

says relax it doesn't even fit Ross. He's

8:56

like, yeah, you don't ask for gifts or little

8:59

things like that back. You don't do that. Yeah.

9:02

None of that stuff. Even if they, you think that they wronged you

9:04

in this. It doesn't matter. You gave them that

9:06

gift or whatever. Like, yeah, that takes you back. No takes you back.

9:09

But also, I respect that. Yeah, that's the

9:11

past. Like it's, they wronged you

9:13

now. Not when you gave it to them. The only reason he

9:15

wants it back is because he wants to hurt her. Maybe

9:19

he loves Angry Birds. Lindsay, you don't know this.

9:21

No Bible on Amazon. Yeah. He

9:23

won that one though. Okay. And

9:25

then labor. For her. Well,

9:28

the top comment is you are the asshole.

9:30

I get why she broke up with you.

9:32

Yeah. Grow up. And then someone said, yes,

9:34

you are the asshole petty and ridiculous. Here's

9:37

a hint for building successful relationships going forward. Do not

9:40

ever give someone a gift and expect it back later

9:42

when they disappoint you. No matter the circumstances like y'all

9:44

are saying. Yeah. Okay.

9:47

Well, no matter the circumstances. Now, if

9:49

somebody was like, oh, I left my box,

9:51

my big DVD collection at your house. I

9:53

want that back. Get that back. But

9:56

that wasn't a gift. Right. It wasn't

9:58

a gift. But I'm saying, like, you can't ask for things back.

10:00

Oh, we you have this thing you do the you know

10:02

the exchanging of boxes of random shit that you

10:04

left at Sure, whatever. Yeah, I

10:06

mean I now in principle I agree with

10:08

you to be devil's advocate

10:11

I would just say you know if I can just see

10:14

a situation where it's like, okay Somebody just out of the

10:16

box, you know went from like, you know, I used to

10:18

respect this person now I Something

10:20

I like a flip switch and I hate them

10:22

now or something and it's like, you know what?

10:24

Yes, I am gonna be that petty getting my

10:26

angry birds plenty back. What are you gonna do

10:28

with that? You're gonna give it to my new

10:30

girlfriend. No, you're not Reminded

10:34

of like how shitty that situation was like

10:36

there's no probably right I

10:38

also want to say that I think that the only

10:40

level of gift or the only kind of gift that

10:43

you can ask for Back is sort of like a

10:45

promise gift. So an engagement ring I feel like that

10:47

is like if you're if you go, oh, I

10:49

don't want to get married to you anymore That's on me to be

10:51

like I should give this back to you.

10:53

What about? About this

10:55

about this, yeah, you it's

10:58

more like you got something jointly But it was a

11:00

gift from one to the other like hey, we got

11:02

a dog, but I'm giving you this That's

11:10

not not the direction I was going I was

11:12

you know more like a living thing that like

11:14

do you have affection for

11:16

not Just a kitchen utensil, but okay

11:27

Yeah, cuz like like you turn well if you got say you

11:29

got like a dog I got totally different

11:31

too. That's a totally different question That's

11:33

no it's not and you got like I

11:36

got you this puppy, but we we have

11:38

we have this puppy together Yeah, what it

11:40

is right? Like what do you do there?

11:43

I always think it's bizarre to give people

11:45

animals as gifts But like it wasn't giving

11:47

like the gift was like, you know, it's

11:49

like Valentine's Day like here's a here's an

11:52

animal But it's our thing to get huh?

11:54

You're not giving it like I'm not giving

11:56

them a dog We're

11:58

getting a dog together, but it's like It's in

12:00

the context of a gift. Kinda, yeah. You're

12:02

saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's a thing

12:04

that we're doing together. Yeah. It's

12:07

like getting furniture together kinda too, or something like

12:09

that. I guess for me, when I said that

12:11

a second ago, it was more just the idea of, like

12:14

they don't pick it or anything. It's like, here's

12:16

your new dog. I feel like that's weird. That

12:18

is weird, yeah, yeah, yeah. I agree with you.

12:21

That's not, yeah, that's, yeah. But

12:24

do you fight to keep that

12:26

dog? If

12:29

I gave the gift to them, and then am

12:31

I, is this my dog now? Yeah, cause like,

12:33

it's our dog. It's our dog. And then

12:36

we split up and they are the, they

12:40

are the antagonist of the breakup

12:42

or whatever. Right, okay, well it is. They're

12:44

the break-up-er and not the break-up-ee. Yeah. That's

12:46

different, cause two, you just need to have a

12:48

discussion about like, how to take care of this

12:50

dog. Cause I feel like the way that you

12:53

would decide that would also apply, even if you decided- The custody

12:55

battle, Lindsay. Even if you decided to go in

12:57

on a pet together and it wasn't a gift at all,

12:59

like you have to have the same exact kind of conversation

13:01

of like, how are we gonna take care

13:03

of this animal? Well right, but this is a

13:05

situation when you've broken up, you go your separate

13:07

ways, and it's like, all right, who actually gets

13:09

to keep our child? That's

13:12

what I'm saying, you have to have that conversation. Oh,

13:14

what? Our angry bird dog. Our

13:16

angry bird dog, yeah. Cause

13:18

I was gonna say, like I know people who have broken

13:21

up and it's like one person kept the dog, one person

13:23

kept the cat. I know another person who broke up. I'm

13:25

gonna say like, these are my dogs. I mean, I

13:27

think that like, if you're asking like ethically, I

13:29

think that, or whatever, you have every right, I

13:31

think if you bought the dog to keep it,

13:33

I guess, you bought the dog, but at the

13:35

same time, in terms of like, if I was

13:37

in that situation, you know,

13:39

yeah, I would definitely totally depend on the circumstance

13:41

and who the other person and the dog and

13:43

me and how much I like the dog, you

13:45

know? What's the lowest

13:47

level gift where

13:50

that, like, I think this person

13:52

is an asshole. Where would I have

13:54

to get to for me to flip that switch

13:56

or you've like, what's the price level or?

13:59

Yeah, yeah. Do you mean yeah, well,

14:01

I mean I kind of said mine I think it's

14:03

been like an engagement ring or yeah, like a vintage

14:05

piece of jewelry Maybe if it was like a family

14:07

heirloom. Oh, yeah for sure that you get like right Look

14:11

like yeah like a blender is a blender too

14:13

insignificant to be like no, I'm gonna take this

14:15

I don't care about the blender but but in

14:17

your point though like Vitamix But

14:22

like if you say you're in a long-term relationship and

14:24

then you know You would say

14:26

like okay. I'm gonna buy you a car. Yeah,

14:28

okay It's like so you can get around and we can go

14:30

places and stuff and it's like you break up I

14:32

would feel fine taking that car back You

14:36

know, that's it that's a significant investment. So

14:38

yes, yeah, I see where you're going. Yeah,

14:40

I'm trying to think like what's the like

14:44

Something that's worth a thousand dollars two

14:46

thousand dollars three thousand dollars I'm

14:49

also like you I'm judging the kind

14:51

of person you are for making these

14:53

kinds of gifts like these gifts like

14:55

Well, you know you call your relationship you have

14:57

some money and you're like, oh and

15:00

you think you're gonna be together for forever or whatever and

15:02

then Get them a car.

15:04

I mean I'm in that situation, but I'm imagining

15:06

somebody could be in that situation That's

15:08

that's definitely one of those things that could be very

15:11

toxic right? Like you're like looking

15:13

for controlling interest in like

15:16

Overwhelming them with things that love bombing Right.

15:19

That's what it's called. Love bombing. Well,

15:21

yeah, that's a whole other thing I would

15:23

this was under the assumption that you're not loved

15:25

by me. It's just like a I'm just getting

15:27

you a gift cuz we're cool together Happy Honda

15:30

days are Behind

15:33

today's we got a big advantage Guess

15:35

what? You're

15:38

gonna wake up and there's gonna be a car with a

15:40

giant bow on the Okay,

15:44

moving on all right, am I the asshole I think

15:46

we got a lot of good mileage out of that

15:49

prompted good discussion Am

15:52

I the asshole for pretending to get fired when

15:54

customers get a temper with me? Basically what happened

15:56

here is that this person works out like let's

15:58

say Starbucks. So I'm gonna just kind of of

16:00

a kid and they have a cool boss

16:02

who they're friends with and you know they

16:04

said periodically throughout the week just really mean

16:06

old people will come in sometime having a

16:08

bad day and then for no reason just

16:10

be yelling at people like complaining about shit

16:13

like oh this coffee's too cold or whatever

16:15

and so he says that now him and

16:17

his boss have this funny gag that they

16:19

play where if anyone ever said complains to

16:21

him like hey my coffee's too hot why

16:23

didn't you make this hotter then his

16:26

boss will come out and go okay you

16:28

are fired to the employee I

16:30

love that thank you sir we pride ourselves on

16:32

the best customer service you're fired yeah so then

16:34

they make a big scene and the person like

16:36

such cry like no I need the money and

16:39

then they get fired and then they'll usually almost

16:41

always they say the the customer gets very apologetic

16:43

and be like oh well you don't have to

16:45

no it's not that big of a deal I

16:47

love it it's like a little bit of a you

16:49

know instant karma for that person

16:51

to feel that empathy of like oh I

16:53

shouldn't be such an asshole about something just

16:55

because I'm having maybe a bad day or

16:57

whatever I even no matter if

16:59

I'm having the worst day I will always treat

17:02

people who are in customer service and stuff like

17:04

that with like the most respect and just be

17:06

as friendly as possible because like well

17:09

if you've been out there in customer

17:12

service and you've waited on Lindsay please

17:15

let us know down in the comments

17:17

whether she tips I mean yeah customer

17:20

service aside like just be nice to people

17:22

like there's you know they're

17:25

not the reason of the thing also

17:27

yeah people yelling at anybody yeah don't

17:29

yell at people that's not that's

17:31

you're not getting anywhere you're all you're doing is

17:33

making yourself look stupid you can

17:35

yell at people quieter well also

17:37

like I'm just kidding yeah you just don't you're like you

17:39

don't have to get you know raise

17:41

your voice yeah people don't have to go

17:43

crazy at all these like you're not it's

17:46

not an injustice that your coffee was incorrect

17:48

or whatever or it's taking five minutes longer

17:50

the personal tragedy yeah come on people are

17:52

yell or yellers that's so upsetting

17:55

I mean all those people

17:57

just going off on on like Starbucks people

18:00

whatever like come on the only

18:02

thing that can make me like yell at

18:04

somebody is it's like you were murdering

18:06

them or hurting them like only murder like

18:08

or like

18:12

physically hurting somebody like I don't know

18:14

what else would make me yell the

18:17

only thing I can be is just like if if if

18:20

the other person is being an asshole

18:23

you know maybe yelling maybe you gotta yell at

18:25

him but it's just kind of a

18:28

certain point well my lucky the best thing to

18:30

do it like the way that I would always

18:32

treat that like people are yelling at you because

18:34

they're they're upset about whatever they're yelling they're being

18:36

they're being away they just sit there

18:38

and look at them you know that are you done that really pisses

18:40

them off yeah

18:43

that's the best response of that kind of stuff well the

18:45

number one the number

18:48

one comment was not the asshole

18:50

that's the perfect way of dealing with hostile

18:52

customers and I think we all agree with

18:54

that I mean definitely not the asshole definitely

18:56

like teaching them like giving them like

18:58

that like Lizzie said like karma a little bit

19:00

of like oh shit I

19:02

overreacted yeah something that I didn't

19:04

expect is happening well in

19:06

the comments we actually have a kind of

19:08

an interesting devil's advocate response saying I disagree

19:11

just like giving a kid a cookie

19:13

when you when they throw a temper

19:15

transform simply reinforces that behavior rewarding customers

19:18

when they explode teaches them that ranting

19:20

and well they're taking it like if

19:22

this person who is ranting is the

19:24

person who is like truly wanted that

19:26

person to get fired like oh then

19:28

it helped me complaining oh well is

19:30

that that's the logic which yeah that's

19:32

gonna be like one in a million

19:34

yeah I don't think that's gonna happen

19:36

like very often but yeah

19:39

they said that they won't hesitate to they can

19:41

go I've had you fired I've had people fired

19:43

I've done it before again okay

19:49

moving on I think that was a good one okay

19:53

Ryan's got so many assholes stories.

20:03

It's weird how you did it too. What do

20:05

you mean? You took a bunch of weird screenshots and they're

20:07

just in your camera roll? As opposed to how would

20:09

you do it? I don't know. I'd make

20:11

a doc of them or something. Something like scroll

20:13

through and read. Well I know

20:16

that you've got a bunch of

20:18

images of different sizes. He's stretching

20:20

to be able to read and

20:22

then panning through. Well

20:24

then now he's scrolling so far that he's

20:26

gotten out of his screenshots and he's in

20:28

random images. Here's the thing though. I read

20:31

all these

20:33

before so it was more like these were like

20:35

supposed to serve as my reminder. You

20:38

were going to remember what

20:40

to say. Basically yeah. Right.

20:43

How long have you been alive? 37 years. 37 years. Has that ever

20:45

been the thing for you? Have

20:49

you ever been off book for anything in your

20:51

life? I

20:56

didn't

21:03

think this was that big of a memorize.

21:05

That's what you were saying. Last night you

21:07

were going through your scene

21:10

and you're like I'll remember this shit tomorrow.

21:13

You'd still tell you that that was this

21:15

morning. Yeah. This is our first hour of

21:17

work. I remember this. So

21:23

anyway, am I the asshole? We're asking

21:25

my college classmate about her pubic hair. You'll

21:30

get the context here in a second. They were

21:32

all hanging out drinking

21:34

and at some point this girl was a little drunk

21:36

and said, I

21:41

asked if the OP was

21:43

circumcised in front of everybody.

21:46

So they're drunk. Are

21:48

you circumcised? And then he just immediately goes,

21:51

I don't know what's your pubic situation. What's your

21:53

pubic hair situation like? Basically he was saying like that

21:55

was kind of a weird uncomfortable question first. I'm going

21:58

to turn it around and turn it around. Say

22:00

like hey, how would you feel if I asked

22:02

you about this and then she basically started you

22:04

know She got flustered ended up crying and leaving.

22:06

Okay, that's not the Bull

22:09

I mean, yeah like no not the

22:11

asshole like a little back and forth and then

22:13

clearly yeah if that's where the Conversation I don't

22:15

know that shit's weird. I guess it also like

22:17

there's so many weird Contextual things

22:19

that uh-huh to be known there for that not

22:21

to be yes super weird. Yeah Well, yeah, the

22:24

top comment is not the asshole She's the one

22:26

who took the conversation in that direction ridiculous of

22:28

her to then get upset when you play the

22:30

same game They were in bed together Any

22:37

other discussions while I scroll my phone here no

22:41

No, that's a lesson for her people need those lessons

22:44

So she's upset. That's a lesson. She goes. Hey, maybe

22:47

next time I won't blur it out. What's

22:49

your dick like? The

22:53

lesson all right, this one's kind of heavy one,

22:55

okay we can But

22:59

basically am I the asshole for wanting to go

23:01

to the funeral of a girl that I helped

23:03

get addicted to drugs basically,

23:06

they This person got

23:08

this person addicted to drugs and then like years later,

23:10

you know, like after he'd gotten clean and stuff He

23:13

got the bad call that she had passed away and

23:15

he won't go to the funeral But he didn't want

23:17

to like piss off the family Oh,

23:20

yeah, they do I definitely understand

23:22

the want to go. Yeah, but yeah, you probably shouldn't

23:24

because of the family That's

23:31

exactly what all the things were like, yeah, not

23:33

the asshole for wanting to go You're you

23:36

know, but you know, you would be the asshole if you

23:38

actually went yeah, you shouldn't go. Yeah Okay

23:49

No, do not do that talk talk I

23:52

want to go play video poker now.

23:54

Yeah, me too. Let's go casino. I

23:56

love video poker by

24:00

the asshole for telling my extended family how

24:02

many men my sister had slept with, with

24:05

after she outed our youngest brother as

24:07

a virgin. So what happened

24:09

here was that, was that they were

24:11

at a big family dinner hanging out,

24:13

you know, and then apparently her sister

24:16

can be a really mean drunk. And

24:20

at some point, her sister

24:22

and then the other, the younger brother were getting in kind of

24:25

in an argument, and at some point she just blurted it out,

24:27

shut up, I'm not gonna argue with a 22 year old virgin.

24:31

And so then this other guy, the OP, he's

24:33

like, my brother didn't deserve that, and my brother's

24:35

kind of shy, he doesn't stick up for himself.

24:37

And she took it over the line, she made

24:39

it personal, you know, so then he blurted out,

24:43

so that way, sorry,

24:46

so I responded by saying how she slept with well over 100

24:48

men while she was in college, and that

24:50

since everyone in the family knows this, it's not a

24:52

big deal, right? You know, basically flipping it

24:54

around on her. But anyway, her

24:57

husband that was there did not know

24:59

about this, and then her husband left and

25:01

said that she had misled him about

25:03

her past. Oh shit. And now her family

25:05

is all blaming the brother for breaking

25:07

up their marriage. Their marital problems now. Is

25:09

he the asshole for blurting out how

25:11

many women, guys, so

25:14

many layers. Yep,

25:16

piece it together. What

25:19

is, by the way, what does ESH mean in these things?

25:22

ESH? Apparently it's a

25:24

common response. I

25:26

have no idea. I'm gonna look it up. That's

25:29

right. Anyway, what do you guys think about all

25:31

this? Everyone sucks here or

25:33

something, maybe like that? That has to be it, yeah. Yeah,

25:35

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's what I like.

25:37

I can't believe you figured that out in your head. Well,

25:40

because that was my thought of everybody

25:42

in that situation is sort of like. I

25:44

mean, pretty much everybody in that situation is pretty cheap. And I've

25:46

seen some of those acronyms like that that people, like, I'm thinking

25:48

how. It's everyone sucks here, right? Yeah, everyone

25:50

sucks in this situation. It's like, everybody

25:52

should check themselves. Like, first of all,

25:55

if you're gonna, you

25:58

know, I don't know. The

26:00

whole thing is fucked. I don't think yeah, I don't think there's

26:02

like they're all assholes I don't think there

26:04

is one to single out there. You

26:06

don't I mean, I basically agree

26:09

with with that But you don't to play

26:11

the devil's advocate You

26:15

know they that there's some people that kind of like Consistently

26:21

Puts things too far that kind of deserve their

26:23

own medicine every once in a while So you

26:25

think that that a good prescription is everything the

26:27

person is not being an asshole by by screaming

26:29

out How many persons what sounds like this the

26:31

sister is constantly an asshole doing stuff like this

26:33

and that basically it's one of those Where it's

26:35

like he just was fed up with it and

26:37

was like, you know what fuck this Like if

26:39

she's gonna be the same stuff like this I'm

26:41

gonna turn around on her do what she's doing

26:43

to do give her a

26:45

piece of her own medicine Basically, I'm not saying

26:47

that's the best way to say was all your

26:50

problem. They're both shitty. Yeah, but yeah I mean

26:52

that whole situation is shitty like that I think

26:54

she's extra shitty if that's always her behavior to

26:56

go to like Belittle people

26:58

like that, especially their own family members. Yeah,

27:00

right a but also like yeah I don't

27:03

know like a lot of times when I hear stuff you

27:05

don't make a right I'd be like family and I

27:07

would never talk like that like right? We

27:10

respect each other two wrongs don't make a

27:12

right except for my bitch brother Everyone

27:17

sucks here one person making personal attacks doesn't mean

27:19

someone else should especially since you weren't even in

27:21

the argument to begin with So,

27:23

all right. I understand that I understand coming

27:26

into to the defense of somebody who's being

27:28

belittled or whatever be like Yeah That

27:30

person doesn't doesn't have it with them or like

27:33

is so shell-shocked or whatever that they can't stick up

27:35

for them So like tell people to back off or

27:37

whatever. Yeah, let's say something like, you know Virginity

27:41

is a choice He's

27:44

saving his virtue You're

27:48

low on letting in sin Anyway,

27:51

all right, we're gonna pick this back

27:53

up here in a second

27:55

after our ad reads everyone all you assholes

27:57

out there Stick around for after the ad

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The holidays start here at Kroger with a

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for everyone. Welcome

29:56

back assholes. It's me Ryan. Thanks

30:00

for sticking with us here on the

30:03

shit ultimate episode of the funhouse podcast.

30:05

That's what we figured out the name

30:07

was right? Okay,

30:09

so back back into

30:11

it. Am I the asshole for

30:13

wearing a joke bikini? My friend got me. Let

30:16

me explain. What happened

30:18

was that apparently this

30:21

this woman got her

30:23

best buddy gave her a gave

30:26

her a bikini. Okay, and then she went

30:28

and she's like, oh, thanks. And then when she went out

30:30

and wore it, it was like, it sounds

30:33

like it was like a prank bikini or something, or it

30:35

was like a see through bikini and her friend didn't tell

30:37

her it was a see through bikini. Okay,

30:40

and so her

30:42

so when her friend got it, she thought that she's like,

30:44

oh, my friend played a joke on me. Okay, so she

30:46

got me the see through bikini and I

30:48

didn't know the see through. She didn't

30:50

say that. And here I am and like

30:52

exposing myself out of here in this pool. So

30:55

then the next time she was hanging out

30:57

with her good friend and her friend's boyfriend,

31:00

they're then they're all hanging

31:02

out, whatever. And then they're like, hey, let's go out to

31:04

the hot tub. So then the

31:06

boyfriend went out and then this OP went out and her

31:08

see through bikini like, oh, I'm going to go out and

31:11

I see through bikini and just like

31:13

being on the joke, you know, so and

31:15

then it was like 30 minutes later that

31:17

the other friend who gave the bikini came

31:19

out and she was like, oh, you're wearing

31:21

my gift. I got you.

31:23

And she's like, yeah, I am. And then the friends

31:25

like, you know, it's see through, right? You know, and

31:27

she's like, yeah. And then later

31:29

on, she's like, so you just wore the see through

31:31

bathing suit with my boyfriend in the hot tub for

31:34

30 minutes, you know, like on purpose. You meant

31:36

to do that. Like, that's kind of

31:38

what her vibe was. And the friends like, I

31:40

was just trying to shove

31:43

this gift you got in my face because, you

31:45

know, why did you give me a see through

31:47

bikini in the first place? I was like a

31:49

joke. But anyway, her friends thought it was really

31:51

weird. It is kind of fucked up,

31:54

I think to be in the

31:56

see through bikini in that like, do.

32:00

doing it as like, Hey, you gave me this fuck you, I

32:02

want to wear it in front of people or whatever in front

32:04

of you or someone else. Probably

32:06

not a thing. The fact that

32:08

there was a long period of time before that person

32:10

was in, in on the joke, that's the

32:12

fucked up part. So it's the 30 minutes in

32:14

the hot tub with the boyfriend. Yeah. Yeah.

32:17

But I mean, you know, it's not like she, she

32:19

clearly didn't have the intention of trying to like, you

32:21

know, seduce this person's boyfriend. No, no, no. But it's

32:24

like, it would have like the joke should have been

32:26

like they were already in the thing and you come

32:28

out and like, Oh, I'm wearing that

32:30

thing. Like, Oh, I'm wearing that thing you got

32:32

me in. And then like that friend is embarrassed.

32:34

Like, Oh shit, I should have told you that

32:36

was a gag. Okay. But doing it knowingly before

32:38

that person came back. Like where's the

32:40

joke part of it? Right? Because like, well,

32:43

I mean, like I, I'm just reading

32:45

what I have here. I don't know for a fact

32:47

that she knew obviously that her friend was going to

32:50

be there for 20 to 30 minutes. Maybe that wasn't

32:52

like part of her plan. Yeah. You know, what do

32:54

you think, Lindsay? I don't think

32:56

that she's the asshole. I think that,

32:59

uh, big misunderstanding. Yeah.

33:01

I think it's sort of like a, Oh

33:03

yeah. Well, I mean, why did you get

33:05

this for me type of thing? And I don't think there

33:07

was like intention to be like, let me wear this sexy

33:10

thing with your boyfriend in the hot tub.

33:12

Yeah. So I don't think that she's the asshole.

33:15

Yeah. Like, I don't know. I do

33:17

think it's funny. Like if you got, it's like

33:19

those people who get the, get their husbands

33:21

or whatever, like the disintegrating bathing

33:24

suits, like disintegrating undies.

33:26

I've never heard of that. That's awesome. Yeah. Like the, so

33:28

you get, you like, they're to look like swim trunks and

33:30

then you get in the water and they fall apart. So

33:35

like it's that, it's that gag,

33:37

which is funny or whatever. I

33:39

guess it depends on the company

33:41

or whatever. Like everyone's comfortable with

33:43

that. But like if

33:45

they're all adults and they're all fine with whatever,

33:47

like that should be fine. Yeah.

33:49

I agree with Lindsay. I'd take mine

33:51

back. Yeah. Most people say not the

33:53

asshole, play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

33:57

And then also another part of the

33:59

context here is that. He immediately started

34:01

the boyfriends like immediately staring at her

34:03

chest. She was like, oh I

34:05

could tell that Yeah, you

34:07

know he noticed That's

34:09

a that's a different kind of bummer All

34:14

right, well, I'm not the asshole I think we all agree on

34:16

that one Am

34:19

I the asshole for planning prickly bushes in

34:21

my front yard to keep the neighborhood kids

34:23

away from my property It's

34:26

basically self-explanatory. Yeah The

34:30

self-explanatory go well, um, I Mean

34:35

I think kind of like I also think kind

34:37

of like you but I mean you clearly it's

34:39

not like it'd be one thing It's like you're

34:41

like, oh I'm set on these prickly bushes and

34:44

oh shit These kids happen to be playing near

34:46

it and it's like but you're really it's like

34:48

it's like you putting the things like homeless People

34:51

outside your homes or something, you know, it's like

34:53

yeah, you can do it You can modify your

34:55

property however you want, but it's with the explicit

34:57

intention of what yeah fucking with these kids So

34:59

I thought you were gonna go the other way

35:03

I think he's like, oh, this is easy like yeah, not

35:05

the asshole or whatever I mean

35:07

you can make an argument that you're not

35:09

the asshole. Hey, it's my property fuck these

35:12

kids But I don't know they're fucking kids

35:14

at the end of the day If you have a thing if the if

35:16

if like grown people were coming and

35:18

stealing your strawberries, you know Yeah,

35:21

like prickly cuz fuck these people

35:23

that'd be a different situation Yeah,

35:26

yeah that is it's fucked up like I

35:28

don't know like people are way too precious about like

35:31

front yards and shit Well,

35:33

this person ended up getting the cops called on

35:35

these people on the people who were going like

35:37

on the kids well At

35:41

some point they came out and they've

35:43

been telling like the kids and the bomb like

35:45

hey You know keep away from my property and

35:47

then at some point she saw late at night

35:49

The dad picking strawberries with the kids so then

35:51

she just likes out there and filmed it And

35:53

then wait strawberries wasn't aside. That's a real thing.

35:55

What do you yeah? I know it's not a

35:57

strawberry so the context is

36:00

They put up prickly bushes because the kids

36:02

were ruining the strawberries. No, no, no

36:04

I think she planted the I

36:06

think the strawberry the prickly bushes came with

36:09

the strawberries She like made the these planted

36:11

strawberry stuff so to keep because

36:13

they were prickly. I Think that's

36:15

what I don't am I am I wrong. I mean, I don't know

36:17

how bushes work I don't know. I don't know if those go to

36:19

I think Don't

36:23

think strawberries grow on prickly bushes, then

36:25

maybe okay This is an

36:27

example of what I might have fucked this up. Sorry What

36:31

I'm gathering is this person was like

36:33

upset that people were trampling their strawberries

36:36

maybe and Planted

36:38

intentionally planted painful bushes

36:40

around them to keep people away. That

36:42

might be it Yes, not the

36:44

asshole and then and then and

36:46

then I mean I started filming them once they saw

36:49

the picking it and then the cops Came and then

36:51

basically said no trespassing here. Yeah.

36:53

Yeah I mean I think I would have done other

36:55

things first like Like fences or

36:57

something to be like around stuff to keep

36:59

people out Yeah, something that would intentionally heart

37:01

like my thought is like, oh if they're gonna

37:03

come here, they're gonna get hurt But

37:06

yeah But I would also understand like if

37:08

it's something that's like preventative from like other

37:10

critters and stuff too So like that

37:12

kind of solution to me seems There's

37:15

there's something missing from the story that it was

37:17

read. It's hard to tell You're

37:19

saying I might be this My

37:22

brother's ear shot. Yeah your screenshot of

37:24

a screenshot didn't help Like

37:26

am I the asshole for making a

37:28

fence of knives? Punching

37:33

that person is just trying to hurt people

37:35

then they're there so if they're trying to

37:37

protect stuff from other things Yeah, maybe there's

37:39

some recourse there. Am I the asshole for

37:42

not completely reading verbatim? Things

37:44

to get the complete context for Omar Okay,

37:47

moving on to the next one. I think this one's kind of fun

37:51

Am I the asshole for sleeping naked on

37:53

top of the covers to teach my flatmates

37:55

girlfriend a lesson? So what

37:57

happened here was that this guy in a

38:00

own room, he'd be hanging

38:02

out and he said that his flatmate's girlfriend has

38:04

no boundaries and will just barge into his room

38:06

and stuff. Usually every

38:08

morning, like the last several weeks, she's coming in and just

38:10

said, like, hey, you want some coffee? You want some tea?

38:12

You want me to make some stuff? And he said, like,

38:15

hey, can you knock? What

38:17

if I was naked or something? And he says

38:19

he sleeps naked under the covers, usually. He's like,

38:22

what if I was doing it? And she's like,

38:24

oh, but you weren't, is what he says that

38:26

she says. You weren't, so it's okay. So

38:29

anyway, I went then he's like, tomorrow I'm

38:31

going to I'm going to sleep naked

38:33

on top of my covers, which he does. And

38:36

then sure enough, she barges in the next morning

38:38

and is like, you want coffee? Oh, my God.

38:40

And sees him sitting there naked, you know, laying

38:42

there naked. And so then he

38:44

is like, well, see, you know, you should have

38:47

done this. And she is like basically like her

38:49

and her boyfriend are like, you

38:51

were just sitting there waiting. You knew she was going to

38:53

come in and you were just sitting there waiting for her

38:55

to come in here. You're the fucking creep. Not the fucking

38:57

not the not the asshole. But

39:00

he did intentionally do that. Lock

39:02

your door. Well, the

39:05

people in all the comments said, lock your fucking door.

39:07

And he said, hey, I wish I could. But the

39:09

the lease says, you know, we can't add locks to

39:11

our doors so that they don't have locks. So

39:14

that's not an option. Back up.

39:16

Not the asshole. She should fucking respect

39:18

his face and not margin. So if

39:20

she's not listening. Well,

39:23

but to Omar's point, if you were to

39:25

set up like a home alone style trap

39:27

for this person to come in and you'd

39:29

be like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You

39:32

know, like that's basically what I like. A bucket falls

39:34

on her head and then she falls. No, I

39:36

mean, but like, yeah, like he intentionally like was

39:38

flashing or whatever. But like, well, in his own

39:41

room for the privacy of his own bag. No,

39:43

he's not the asshole here. But I'm flashing

39:45

her. She's walking in on. Yeah. But

39:48

he's on purpose doing it in a position to where he

39:50

knew that she would walk in on him. Good.

39:53

Fuck her. She's not respecting. I agree with

39:55

you. I'm just trying to get you. But

39:57

he's yeah, definitely not the asshole. That's

40:00

fucked up that somebody like if repeatedly told

40:02

like hey, don't just don't do it. Yeah,

40:04

that's super disrespectful That is very disrespectful. I

40:06

say what can you do? That's

40:09

legal But

40:11

also there's there's no way they're not allowed to

40:13

have locks on doors. Come on. I

40:15

don't know But yeah, the

40:18

boyfriend was like, you know, like So

40:21

that you're out of order that you hear Basically

40:23

saying like you threatened to do this before basically

40:25

because you know whenever the she'd come in saying

40:27

like hey I could be naked like what might

40:29

be naked next time like it's almost like he

40:31

said he's not like he's a fucking moron, too

40:35

Well, yeah, I mean get a different roommate, yeah Yeah,

40:39

I agree Any

40:42

other thoughts about that one? I'm just judging them Keep

40:50

talking, please. Do you have a roll of toilet

40:52

paper over there? Well, cuz I couldn't find the

40:54

tissues at first and I needed to blow my

40:57

nose So you went stole that from the bathroom.

40:59

No, this was over there I

41:03

did randomly see a roll of toilet paper at the other

41:05

day yesterday Am

41:08

I the asshole for pretending to not understand

41:10

Japanese and making a child cry? So

41:13

in this one, it's a probably

41:15

yeah Let me

41:18

tell you the content. It's this English

41:20

teacher who's 20 years old female

41:22

is living in Japan and

41:26

They're teaching English in Japan and then

41:28

they have this, you know,

41:30

there's obviously like any class There's some problem

41:33

kids or whatever who were more disruptive than

41:35

others. Okay, and apparently there's this

41:37

one kid who's super disruptive She

41:40

says we'll call him Sam and he's 12 and he's like

41:42

the class clown He loves attention to do anything to

41:44

get his classmates to notice them And anyway,

41:46

so she like separated him from the other

41:48

people because apparently like no matter how

41:50

much she complains To anyone parents or

41:52

teachers no one they're like just deal with it.

41:54

You got to deal with that, you know I'll

41:57

give me kids kids be kids deal with it.

41:59

So she made Sam sit somewhere else and then

42:01

she wasn't like responding to anything he was doing

42:03

and he was like complaining and being really mean

42:05

to her and all of a sudden he started

42:07

like she's not allowed to apparently talk

42:09

in Japanese to these kids. She has to talk

42:11

in English because she's English teacher. Yeah. Okay.

42:14

That's like part of her job description and this kid,

42:16

but she knows Japanese and so this kid was like

42:18

saying all these really mean Japanese insults

42:21

to her in the back, you know,

42:23

calling her stupid old lady and disgusting

42:25

and stuff and so then she

42:27

started saying like in a loud voice

42:29

she was like acting like she was misinterpreting and she's

42:31

like, oh, did you just call me nice? Did you

42:33

just call me cute? Like, oh, thank you, you know,

42:35

and I'll follow the other kids were like, ahh,

42:38

like, you know, like, like he thought she

42:40

thought that he's called her disgusting and she's

42:42

saying it's nice and then it got him

42:45

so frustrated that he ended up crying and

42:47

leaving the class and then. How

42:49

old are these children? Yeah,

42:52

that's old enough. Not the asshole. Yeah, not

42:54

the asshole. That's old enough. Tough love. Yeah.

42:58

I mean, but not even tough love. It's

43:00

like, you know, it's a thing about like teaching respect.

43:02

It's like, if you're going to be disrespectful, I'm going

43:04

to treat you like a goober. It's

43:08

also it's like, yeah, playing along with them

43:10

in a way to you. Yeah,

43:12

that kid obviously couldn't couldn't handle it.

43:15

Yeah, shouldn't be dishing. Yeah, if you can't

43:17

take it. Well, at the end

43:19

of this, it says at the end of class, my

43:22

co-worker saw that he was crying and I explained what

43:24

happened and I got chastised for making a student cry.

43:26

Am I the asshole? No, that's stupid. Okay.

43:29

Yeah, I mean, that was like the probably the most

43:31

effective way to go about like, yeah, because like, what

43:33

else are you going to do? You're not going to

43:35

fucking smack people. Yeah, what can

43:37

you do? I don't know. You can't do

43:39

anything. Like, I'm not saying that you should smack people, but like,

43:41

that's not the recourse you have. You're

43:43

you played along with the kid and you can

43:46

take it. That's probably a good lesson for them.

43:49

I agree. Yeah, overall. Yeah, it's hard to deal with.

43:51

I'm sure that's just dealing with kids is the worst

43:53

because I used to I used to work with kids

43:55

a lot. Especially that age, that age range is

43:57

when like kids are like, oh. I

44:00

am popular if I'm being a dick or a

44:02

dawg. Or like if not listening is cool or

44:04

whatever. Right. And it's like at the same time,

44:06

it's like, I'm just, dude, we're just like, we're

44:09

just trying to have a good time. Like learn something

44:11

or whatever. Like you, it would be so much better

44:13

if you just. Shut the fuck

44:15

up. Well, do you just like participate?

44:17

Yeah. It's so much. We're having fun

44:19

here. Do stuff. But kids are

44:21

like, no, it's cool to be shitty. Like that's

44:24

how I'm a cool guy. And I

44:26

also don't think it's necessary for everyone

44:28

to immediately like feel bad or guilty

44:30

when a child cries because I don't

44:32

necessarily think it's always a bad thing.

44:34

Like I think children can cry because

44:36

they're experiencing frustration. You know, obviously

44:39

they could be physically hurt, but I

44:42

think a lot of times when that kind of thing

44:44

happens, they're clearly frustrated and that's why they're crying. That's

44:46

how they're kind of releasing that or

44:48

expressing that emotion. And it's sort of like, yeah,

44:50

I get that frustration, but it's like, I don't

44:52

think they're an asshole for causing them to be

44:55

frustrated. Yeah. That's like,

44:57

yeah, I would be telling kids all

44:59

the time, like, I understand you're trying to be

45:02

cool, but like, just have fun. You're

45:04

a fucking kid. Yeah. Like it'd

45:06

be one thing to even have a 12 year

45:09

old kid that like you are in charge of

45:11

and having to deal with that. But I feel

45:13

like it's even extra harder when it's something like

45:15

your position where you're not technically, and you know,

45:17

the masters of these kids, but it's like

45:19

you are in charge of them for that period of

45:21

time, but you can't be too strict on them because

45:23

it's like you're not their parent. Ryan

45:25

just explained like the entire like crisis of

45:27

being a teacher. It's

45:29

not about being too strict or whatever. It's

45:31

like, that's not how they respond. Yeah. Yeah.

45:35

You know, just like, come on, man. Yeah.

45:37

We're just people trying to have a good time here. We're just chilling here.

45:39

Come on, man. All right,

45:41

cool. That was a good one. I'm

45:44

going to read this whole one because it's short and

45:46

I don't want you to miss any of the context.

45:48

Okay. Am I the

45:51

asshole for wanting my daughter, for wanting

45:53

my daughter to have her birthday party on

45:55

my stepdaughter's birthday? My stepdaughter, 18,

45:57

her birthday is in a few. days

46:00

away from my daughters, who's

46:02

seven. My daughters is on a Wednesday, my

46:04

stepdaughters is on a Saturday. I wanted to

46:06

have my daughter's birthday on the Saturday because

46:09

I think more people would come, likely

46:11

come that day and also because she wants to

46:13

sleep over after the party. My stepdaughter wanted to

46:16

have a little dinner at a restaurant with friends

46:18

and family, which we could only do on the

46:20

Sunday. We'll still have cards and presents for her

46:22

on her birthday, just not the party. My husband

46:24

agrees with me and is happy to do it

46:26

this way, but my stepdaughter is really angry. She

46:28

said she doesn't want to celebrate with us

46:30

at all if we don't celebrate on that

46:33

day. That sucks.

46:36

Most people, I'm just going to spoil

46:38

her, say that she's being an asshole.

46:40

The stepdaughter is? No, that the poster

46:42

is the asshole

46:44

for wanting to move her stepdaughter's real

46:46

birthday for her daughter's fake birthday. The

46:52

stepdaughter is the older one? The stepdaughter is

46:54

the old one. The 18 year old. Wow.

46:56

No, the 18 year old is being a baby,

47:01

right? I can

47:05

agree. Well, I mean,

47:07

why? Because she doesn't want to have

47:09

a birthday on a Sunday? Well, no,

47:11

just like you have this little kid

47:13

actually cares about birthdays. You're fucking 18 years

47:15

old. Like that is one way to look at

47:17

it. I'm in my

47:20

30s and I am upset that I,

47:23

you know, when I have, I

47:27

would, I would, I care about my birthday and I feel

47:29

like it should be a special thing because I try to

47:31

do that for other people. So that, but they

47:33

are doing something special for that person. Just

47:35

not on the actual day. I'm saying

47:37

there's a way that they could all discuss it as adults

47:39

and be like, Hey, maybe one of them

47:41

is seven years old, but okay. I meant

47:43

the parent and the daughter

47:46

and have that conversation about like, Oh,

47:49

well maybe we make it the Saturday before

47:51

or something. But like the son, the daughter,

47:53

it's the day after. Yeah. We're going to

47:55

do the day after. That's not your birthday.

47:57

That's as far away from your birthday as

47:59

possible. If

48:01

it needs to be on a Saturday, do

48:03

it this Saturday before or figure out another time.

48:06

Like I don't think that it needs to be

48:08

on the teenager's birthday if that's... But

48:10

that's... So you agree with Omar then that day? No, he

48:12

was saying the teenager is an asshole and I was saying...

48:14

Yeah, the teenager... But you're saying that it still moves the

48:17

teenager's birthday, right? No, I'm saying like there's... I think

48:19

you could pick another day for the seven-year-old's birthday.

48:21

Oh, for the seven-year-old's birthday? Yeah. Okay.

48:24

It doesn't have to be on Tuesday. But I'm

48:27

saying there's a way for the teenager and the

48:29

adults to talk about it and maybe compromise is

48:31

like, oh, it'd be a really nice thing for

48:33

you to do if you just let us celebrate

48:35

the seven-year-old's birthday and do something extra special. Like

48:37

it's on the parents to also, I think,

48:40

incentivize being chill

48:42

about that. Yeah. Like they should be like, hey,

48:44

you know, I know it's your birthday on this

48:46

day, but like we'll do something

48:49

extra special if you're... You're 18 years old.

48:52

We're selling a child's birthday. Still, 18 is really young though. I

48:54

can see where they're coming from though. Mentally. Mentally.

48:57

Yeah. They

48:59

shouldn't be allowed to vote. I agree. But

49:04

yeah, that's one of the comments. One of the top

49:07

comments that made me laugh said, big evil stepmom energy

49:09

in this one. What? I

49:12

don't know. But then

49:14

this person said, the fact that you'd prioritize

49:16

a seven-year-old's rescheduled birthday over your stepdaughter's actual

49:18

birthday for good reason or not, we'll send

49:20

a message. The stepdaughter will come second in

49:22

your eyes. It does send a message. It's

49:24

your own biological kid. It sends a message.

49:26

That's why you need to have a discussion.

49:29

There's a weird dynamic there that probably like

49:31

other context in, like if they don't have

49:33

a great relationship already because of being step-parents

49:35

or whatever, like, you

49:37

know, there's probably other things there, but come on. It's

49:40

a seven-year-old versus an 18-year-old. And then to your

49:42

point, Lindsay, they said, you're the asshole. Have the

49:44

sleepover on a Friday night for your daughter and

49:46

the party and dinner on Saturday for your stepdaughter

49:48

or celebrate your daughter's birthday the prior weekend. You'll

49:51

ostensibly have close to each other birthdays for both

49:53

girls for the rest of their lives. Or

49:55

prioritize them equally now. My

49:58

brother and I have pretty close birthdays like I'm

50:00

on the 24th and he's like 10 days after

50:03

that. Okay. One year

50:05

we did have a birthday together. It was

50:07

when I was 11 and he was seven. It

50:09

was a seven 11 birthday. All

50:12

right. Your birthday is close to,

50:14

wait, you're, you're like New

50:16

Year's Eve or something. I'm Christmas Eve. Christmas

50:18

Eve. He's in January. So do

50:20

you get, um, do

50:23

you always get doubled up with Christmas? Doubled

50:26

up like what celebration or? Celebration

50:28

presents, stuff like that. My parents have

50:30

always been like, my family's pretty good. I'm like, Oh,

50:33

here's a birthday gift. Here's a

50:35

Christmas gift. Um, I

50:37

would say that in general, I

50:39

think that I tend to

50:41

get birthday gifts more than the regular person

50:44

gets a birthday gift because people are already

50:46

sort of in the gift giving mind of

50:48

like, Oh, it's Christmas. Like, um,

50:52

I feel like, you know, a

50:55

good friend of mine, I would be like, Oh,

50:57

let's go out for your birthday. And we'll have

50:59

dinner or something like that. But during Christmas, people

51:01

are like, Oh, it's your birthday. And then like,

51:03

they're like, I got you this gift. Whereas maybe

51:05

I wouldn't necessarily get that person a gift in

51:08

like April or something. Like, does that make sense?

51:11

People are already in the gift giving mind of

51:13

because it's Christmas. They're like, Oh yeah, Christmas.

51:15

And it's not that I

51:17

expect that. It's not me being like, and I

51:19

get more gifts. It's just, I think that that

51:22

tends to happen because people always ask, Oh, do

51:24

people give you like birthday Christmas combination gift? Yeah.

51:26

It's like, yes, that does happen. But I often

51:28

get gifts from people who I don't think would

51:30

normally buy me a gift. It's my birthday was

51:33

in, you know, July, you know, that's very

51:35

interesting. I feel like it's one of those things

51:37

that almost like, it's like you,

51:39

you, you, maybe you, in your younger years, you're

51:41

kind of like, fuck, I wish I had a

51:43

separate birthday because you know, I wish I could

51:46

double the gifts, you know, right. It gets more

51:48

gifts. But now it's almost like once people

51:51

outgrow giving gifts, then also you get gifts

51:53

for life because your birthday is so close

51:55

to it, right? Yeah. Just cause

51:57

people are more inclined to give. Fucking

52:00

birthday. Yeah, but like like my sister my

52:02

sister's a couple days after Christmas Yeah, so

52:04

she was I think she was getting doubled

52:06

up all the time Like she grew up

52:09

being like her birthday and Christmas

52:11

were the same Like combo

52:13

gift like here's your combo. Yeah, but just like it's

52:15

like it You know like everything for

52:17

her birthday blended into like oh we just did

52:19

stuff for Christmas So like birthday things aren't really

52:21

gonna happen or whatever Oh now

52:23

see I never really had that and and as

52:25

I got older I made it a point to

52:28

like cuz I like to celebrate my birthday I

52:30

think it's fun to feel like it's special It's

52:32

for me because I like to make people feel

52:34

that way on their birthday of like this is

52:36

your special day You've never done anything for

52:38

me on my birthday. Yeah, what the fuck? Also,

52:43

you know the kind of person who's like makes a big deal about

52:46

your birthday Reflect

52:48

on my own mortality Lindsay. Thanks a lot

52:51

But like it's it's also about somebody wants that so

52:53

like if somebody's like, oh, I'm having this birthday thing

52:55

Like I want to make that really special for them

52:59

All that says I'm not an asshole when I got

53:01

older When I got

53:03

older, I was like, no, I'm gonna do it

53:05

earlier So like I obviously don't expect people to

53:07

come over on my birthday because it's Christmas Eve

53:10

People are especially living here and

53:12

people are not in town. So I go

53:14

Oh December Blank, we're I'm

53:16

having a party and it's my birthday party.

53:18

So please come what when I turned 30

53:20

I actually moved it all the way to January and

53:23

I had my birthday party at the end of January

53:25

because I wanted to have a Big party and I

53:27

wanted lots of people to come and I was like,

53:29

there's no way I can make this happen in December

53:31

Because so many Christmas parties So

53:34

I'll I'll make it happen myself So,

53:38

yeah Well everyone we're

53:40

here at the end of the podcast We're

53:43

gonna do one more before we leave. Okay, but

53:45

this one would be pretty fun. Okay, but

53:48

I Want

53:51

to come to your January birthday party next

53:53

year In

53:56

a couple weeks. I'll tell you about it. Yeah. Thank you What

54:00

should I get you? What would you like? Double

54:03

eggs Want

54:05

people to bring food? I

54:07

have a picture of Ryan from my party from last year.

54:09

So your Christmas party. Yeah, it's

54:12

my Christmas birthday party Ryan

54:14

did not show up. That was Santa Claus. Oh my

54:17

god Remember

54:23

I remember like no hang on trying to

54:25

get to the kitchen or something and

54:28

you Stopped me to talk to

54:30

me about something forgot that in mid conversation forgot

54:32

what you're talking about and started over It

54:38

was Santa con everyone all right, I mean once

54:40

a year I also sorry we don't have

54:42

to keep talking about this But I also have I was

54:44

looking at this look yesterday because I was trying to remember

54:46

my layout And I have a video of you and you're

54:48

like James is trying to take advantage of me, but halfway

54:50

through the video I fall over and that's just the

54:53

camera pointed at the ceiling. I'm like Oh

54:55

God Trying

54:59

to crouch I think and I like

55:01

fall over by anyways. I'll show you the video All

55:04

right for our last am I the asshole? This

55:06

is a mighty asshole for telling my mother-in-law. I

55:08

want to fuck her son So

55:10

what happened here everyone is that? This

55:13

person wait yes, no no go

55:15

through the do the the hierarchy of the family

55:17

again real quick Am

55:20

I the asshole you Yeah,

55:23

I want to I Their

55:26

mother-in-law's son Yes,

55:28

am I the asshole for telling my brother? I

55:31

want to fuck her son which I she is

55:33

in this she's referring to her husband her husband

55:36

So yeah, she just I think it's a

55:38

am I the asshole for being crass or something like

55:40

that right? Yes, okay,

55:42

I'm making my mother-in-law uncomfortable.

55:44

Well, but but there's a story to

55:46

it basically it's like I Know

55:54

I'm sorry No

55:58

this person's husband comes back,

56:00

okay, and they're from a long, like

56:02

two-month trip away, okay, because they were

56:04

on work and stuff. So the husband

56:07

comes back, and then she's obviously so

56:09

excited to see her husband that

56:12

... but also the husband's mom

56:15

is very excited to see her son. Okay, and

56:17

so then her- I've read this

56:19

one before, and I think we've talked about maybe- Did we

56:21

talk about this? ... on this podcast or something, but- Oh, fuck. I

56:24

don't remember. This is a rerun. All

56:26

right. I'll summarize it, but basically,

56:29

the mom ends up coming to stay

56:32

with them immediately, so they have no alone time.

56:34

Yep, that'd be where you're going. And then for

56:36

like nine days, the mom is there just like,

56:38

oh, the mom lives an hour away, so she's

56:40

living with them, she spends every second with them.

56:43

They're going out to eat, she's inviting herself along,

56:45

they're watching TV cuddling on her own

56:48

couch, she's there. It's like the mom is just

56:50

there, and then they're kind of giving her subtle hints

56:52

like, all right, anytime now you can go

56:55

back. She's like, oh no, I

56:57

don't want to. I'm not done seeing my son yet. And

57:00

then at some point, it had just

57:02

gone too far, and the wife snapped

57:04

and said, I don't want to misquote

57:06

her. Hold

57:09

on, sorry. Basically,

57:13

since you seem to be oblivious, I will put this

57:16

bluntly, I want to fuck your son. If

57:18

you don't want to see her here, then you need to

57:20

leave. Yes. I'm going

57:22

to talk about this. You talked about this? What the

57:25

fuck? I don't even remember. How did that leave my

57:27

brain? Did I talk about it with you, or we

57:29

definitely went over this one. All right. How

57:31

are you searching for what this is? Yeah, how

57:33

are you doing? I'm looking on the podcast to see like

57:35

... Well, then Omar, since this is new

57:37

to Omar, Omar, what are your thoughts on ... Does

57:40

this woman cross the line by telling her money and

57:42

law? No. Really?

57:45

No. Okay. Because

57:47

the mom should realize that ... I'm assuming that this

57:49

person is coming back from something like dangerous

57:52

or something to warrant this

57:54

kind of like overly aggressive

57:57

affection for their return. They

58:00

were like just as a different state for

58:02

work. Okay. Well like if the

58:04

mom was like that jazz Like the mom

58:07

has to recognize that there she's not the

58:09

only relationship there that needs to be like

58:11

renewed and stuff Yeah, but there are other

58:13

things too But like it yeah, it does

58:15

suck because a mom you know, if that's

58:17

their family blood and stuff Yeah, totally warrants

58:20

wanting to be around and stuff. It has to

58:22

recognize that there was like another thing going on to you

58:25

Right. Yeah the

58:28

I would argue That It's

58:31

like in theory Yes, they're

58:33

not the asshole But I think that the just

58:36

phrasing and way it was and tone I think

58:38

is kind of asshole ish I think there was

58:40

a budget or motor law. There was a bunch

58:42

of build-up there that was either Be

58:45

there oblivious to or intentionally oblivious

58:47

to That led

58:50

to that kind of reaction well I

58:53

feel like I Even if I got

58:55

to the point where I wanted to say something like that

58:57

I would still be like, I mean, yeah I was gonna

58:59

say that in a different way. Yeah, I do the diplomatic

59:01

thing like look, you know I we love you with like

59:03

like your great But you need to leave but but we

59:06

but we haven't had any moment to be together like, you

59:08

know And then you know, even if you wanted to bring

59:10

up that you want to fuck their son You can do

59:12

like we haven't a chance to be

59:14

intimate together You know, you

59:17

don't have to say I want to fuck your son.

59:19

You want to watch it or get the fuck out?

59:21

Yeah, I mean, yes, you're right. There's a better way

59:23

to do it But like I'm the I'm

59:25

gonna go with the intention behind as opposed to

59:28

like the actual thing Okay, not the asshole for

59:30

being like hey mom you need to leave. Yeah

59:33

Been here for too long or like hey come

59:35

back in a couple days and we can hang out more

59:38

But like we need some time for our relationship

59:40

as well. Yeah So

59:43

you said on the podcast first I can't find

59:45

it I but I remember having this conversation

59:47

because I remember this specifically of like yeah

59:49

What to say when your mom your mother-in-law?

59:51

Yeah, I won't leave and it's like yes

59:54

We get it. You love your son, but

59:56

like this is our home and you should

59:58

respect that and fucking nine

1:00:00

days. Yeah. Yeah. Because if I

1:00:02

remember, she's in their home. She's in

1:00:04

their home. Yeah. And it's like, yeah, go,

1:00:06

go away. Yeah. Yeah. I

1:00:08

guess. Yeah. So like strict by the

1:00:11

rules, not, kind

1:00:13

of the asshole for the way they phrased it.

1:00:15

Yeah. Not the asshole for the intent behind. Yeah.

1:00:17

No, absolutely. I totally

1:00:19

agree with that. The desire to have

1:00:22

her leave is totally normal. But like,

1:00:24

yeah, mom should understand, like, yeah, they

1:00:26

should, they should have understood that like hacking spent a couple of

1:00:28

days, come back in a couple of days or whatever. Like this

1:00:31

is, I'm not the only person here that

1:00:33

was very selfish. Sometimes parents are oblivious and

1:00:35

or apples. Not

1:00:38

just the wife. What was

1:00:40

the last thing you said? I said selfish against

1:00:43

the son as well. Because I'm sure they were

1:00:45

like, I want to, you know,

1:00:47

not, I just, I want to bond my wife.

1:00:49

Yeah. I don't, I want to fuck, but like,

1:00:52

I want, I want time for, with like this,

1:00:54

with my wife, this person that I, whatever. Well,

1:00:57

and also to be fair, a lot of

1:00:59

people were also bringing up the fact that

1:01:01

the guy should have stood the guy and

1:01:03

said something to his mom. Yeah. Way before

1:01:05

that he had to have his wife. Probably.

1:01:07

Yeah, probably. Which I agree with. Well,

1:01:10

hell yeah. I think we got a lot of good discussions

1:01:13

about stuff today. We're all,

1:01:16

basically in agreement. I don't think we all, did

1:01:18

any of us disagree on any, whether it once said

1:01:20

asshole, the other said not asshole. No, mostly. I think

1:01:22

it was one who was maybe on the fence, but.

1:01:24

Yeah. Omar, what do you want to do for your birthday? Yeah. Plan

1:01:27

it right now. My birthday. It's in

1:01:30

January. It's in January. What

1:01:32

day? Huh? Huh? Huh? There's a couple

1:01:34

right next to each other. I don't know. I

1:01:37

think there are a bunch of January people that

1:01:39

we are aware of or in our circles. January

1:01:43

12th. I was going to say 10. Wait, how did you

1:01:45

know that? I

1:01:48

was really close. I thought it was a 10th. January

1:01:50

12th. Is that a weekday this year? I

1:01:52

don't think it was a Friday. I

1:01:55

already have it in your

1:01:57

calendar. Oh, you're right. I don't

1:01:59

do much for. Yeah, that's what

1:02:01

I'm saying. So, but whatever you want

1:02:03

to do, we'll make it happen. Well,

1:02:06

everyone, thanks for watching and

1:02:08

stick around next week for

1:02:11

the penultimate episode of the

1:02:13

Funhouse podcast. And after that,

1:02:15

the ultimate. Who are the guests that

1:02:17

you're going to bring for the next year? Oh, my God.

1:02:19

Who's your who's who's the ones that are worthy for

1:02:22

the last two? Well, for the next episode,

1:02:24

I think at least is going to be here

1:02:26

chatting with us and we're going to get. Yeah. Well,

1:02:29

yeah. Thank you. Thank you. We're

1:02:31

going to talk about some, you know,

1:02:33

of our favorite moments from this year.

1:02:35

Just in general, pop culture means recap

1:02:38

everything that's gone on this year.

1:02:41

And then I think we're going to try to get it's going to be

1:02:43

I think we're going to try to have more. She's going to do

1:02:45

the soup and there's going to be gaming news. Now,

1:02:50

they'll really want that. So we can't. But

1:02:52

we'll try to get as many people in here as possible.

1:02:55

So you'll you'll get a chance to hear from everybody on

1:02:57

the Funhouse team. Thanks

1:03:00

for hanging out and listening and watching. And

1:03:02

is there anything cool that's coming out that

1:03:04

we should talk about? There's a

1:03:06

fun Christmas episode coming out a little bit

1:03:09

with. We got some big Christmas guests. Oh,

1:03:12

some videos coming up. Christmas

1:03:14

video already out by the time this comes

1:03:16

out. Typing competition number two. Oh,

1:03:19

my God. Oh, yeah. That was scary. I

1:03:21

am nervous about watching that. You

1:03:23

cut that one. I cut that video. Yeah. How do I

1:03:26

do? You did. Bad.

1:03:30

All right. So no

1:03:32

more. So no more. So yeah, lots of fun

1:03:34

stuff coming out and some cool. There's

1:03:36

a board as hell that's coming out this

1:03:39

Friday. Is it this Friday? It is detective. Says

1:03:42

they'd be a detective. All right. So the next

1:03:44

Friday is Board of Hell. Star Wars

1:03:46

Armada. No, I don't think

1:03:48

so. I think so. I'm

1:03:51

looking at something else, then. Did

1:03:54

we? But that's going to definitely come out. So, you

1:03:56

know, this comes

1:03:58

out in two days. Anyways, they

1:04:00

don't want to hear this. Yeah. Be

1:04:02

up. I mean, people should be excited that

1:04:04

that is coming eventually. So thanks

1:04:07

for watching and listening, everybody. Thanks, Ryan. Thanks, everybody.

1:04:09

Appreciate it. We're not assholes. Thank

1:04:11

God I was worried about that. This

1:04:22

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1:04:24

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1:04:28

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